Chapter 24

Alec

Of course this room looks immaculate. This is the Cullen's house after all. Alice probably designed everything herself, so it looked like something out of a magazine.

Why do doctor's rooms try to make you feel so comfortable? So that's its not as bad when you flip out? So that at least you're in a nice environment? I truly don't understand.

So, Carlisle was waiting for me when I got home from school—a crappy day let me tell you—and I really wanted to get the whole crappy-touchy-feeling shit over with and get on with my day. Clearly, it's not going to be that easy. Well at least Jasper's not here, to try and control my emotions. I would really hate to be all heartfelt and stuff while I probably spilled my guts in a very embarrassing way.

I threw myself down in the chair opposite Carlisle's desk. He looked up from a book he was reading and cleared his throat.

"Alec," he began, "I just want you to know that I really appreciate you doing this, and – " I listened like I was paying attention, but I really didn't care.

"So," Carlisle stopped and looked at me, "would you mind telling me any anything about your human life?" He looked slightly nervous as he asked me. He should feel nervous, after all, I AM a Volturi guard member.

"It sucked." Was my reply, and Carlisle sighed, but went with it.

"Is you're vampire life much better?"

"Yes."

"Alec?"

"Yes?"

"I understand that this is hard for you, but I can't get anything out of these one word answers. I won't be able to help you, and I know you do not want my help, I feel that you should talk about things, and lessen the pain you carry. I can't read you. Are you happy? Sad? Ready to kill me? Your face is a mask, and—" I let out a short bark of laughter.

"What did I say?" Carlisle asked.

"You sound like Jane," I replied, to his surprise, "she was always telling that my face was a mask because I rarely let any emotion out through it. She could hardly tell if I was annoyed, happy, angry or sad—that my face conveyed nothing of what I was feeling. It bothered her because she could never tell if I was joking or not.

"You have always been that way then?"

"What?"

"Have you always hidden emotions?"

"I'm not too sure I understand," I said, slightly confused as to where he was going with this.

"Well, Alec, even when you and the rest of the guard came to Forks a few years ago to try and destroy Renesmee," I shuffled uncomfortably, "I could read the expressions on almost everyone there. Aro yearned, Marcus looked bored, like he couldn't care, Caius looked angry, Jane was furious, Felix and Demetri wanted a fight. The witnesses that you brought were petrified. My family was nervous, Emmett was itching for a fight, but also many were frightened. I could tell these things because of our eyes. Even though we are vampires, our eyes convey how we are feeling. Those emotions that I named for you that I saw that day were conveyed through the eyes. With you however, I could see nothing. Surrounded by most of the Volturi that wanted us dead, you could have been looking at a baseball game where your team is losing. Or possibly watching a really bad movie. Or a myriad of things. Nothing shifted in your eyes, nothing could give away how you were feeling. The eyes usually betray a person, showing true feelings. With you, your eyes are like an empty abyss. And no one can see anything in them."

"The eyes of a killer," I murmured to myself.

"What?" Carlisle sharply asked, only slightly hearing me.

"That's what my mother told me," I sighed and told him, "that I had the eyes of a killer. I had almost no emotion when I was human. Certainly I showed no emotion when I was around my parents. They wouldn't tell you, but it freaked them out. I saw it in their eyes." I gave a sly smile.

"You didn't like your parents?"

I laughed harshly. "I did when I was younger, but after your own family sends you to burn alive, I wouldn't care too much for them, would you?"

"I suppose not," Carlisle responded. "What else could you tell me about your human life? Your parents? Or friends?"

"The only friend that I had was Alexandra and her sister Lucy. Jane and I scared the other children away, when we came in rare contact with them, and my parents thought we could have been so much more; that Jane and I were who we were wasn't enough. They weren't happy with us, and as a result, Jane and I grew distant from them."

"How old were you when you were tried as witches?"

"Tried? How about grabbed from our house, wrestled down the streets, getting pelted at with god-knows-what, being tied to a stake, and watching people who knew you stare at you with hatred all over their faces, and watch a man in a black mask take a torch and light up straw by your foot, so you are staring death in the face?"

Now it was Carlisle who shuffled uncomfortably.

"I was sixteen."

Carlisle looked at me, there might have been pity in his eyes. "Could you tell me how you were saved?" This was no longer just questions he was asking me about my past, I could see in his eyes that he actually cared about me. He was shocked and angry at the young age at which we were tried, and he was curious as to how we survived. Well, not survived, per say, but rescued and then turned into vampires.

"I'll try, thought it's a bit fuzzy." I paused, trying to recall all the memories that I hide deep in the back of my mind. "Jane was screaming, cursing and just making a lot of noise. I was just worried about Jane, and taking in my last moments of humanity. Suddenly, people were pointing above our heads and screaming. This bat shaped thing came down from one of the roofs above us, and landed in front of the crowd, and started to kill people. It probably didn't help people thinking that we weren't witches, but whatever. We were dying anyway. Then another shape, I think it was Aro, landed next to Jane. I believe I started screaming and yelling him, because I did not want him hurting Jane. I was screaming, and yelling at the shape until one of them came next to me. I'm pretty sure it was Caius. After that, I remember a searing pain coursing throughout my body, and I'm almost positive I was screaming my head off. I remember being concerned about Jane, but that's it. When the pain stopped, I realized I was in a castle, and there were the things that saved us, watching over me and Jane. As I turned my head, I realized that Jane looked a lot like whatever saved us. And then I saw that I did as well. And then Aro started to explain what they were and what they did. And then he told us how special we were, and he asked us to join the Volturi. Jane, for the first time really feeling wanted, I guess, agreed right away. I simply nodded my head after Jane agreed. I wasn't about to be separated from her, my only family. So that's how I began my vampire life." I paused. "Am I done now?"

"Almost," Carlisle responded. "Could you tell me how Aro knew that you and Jane were special?" Crap. Not that question.

"I'm done now," I firmly said as I got up to leave. "That's more than I've spoken to anybody, let alone about my life, so you should be happy about that. Maybe another time we can have a little chat about special abilities and stuff like that," I said the last bit sarcastically.

Carlisle just sighed and nodded as I walked out the door. I decided I was going to go for a run to clear my head and I open the front door to find Seth Clearwater standing there, about to knock.

"Hey Alec," Seth said, "what's up? Did Edward send you to open to door for me? I have news from Jacob."

"Edward's not here, actually," I replied, "it's only me and Carlisle."

"OK, then can I tell him?"

"Yeah, sure." I stepped out of the way of the door so Seth could come in. Out of all the wolves, only Seth didn't have a problem with me or Lexi. The others were guarded, but seemed to like Lexi more than they did me. But I can see why—Lexi didn't come to kill them all.

"Carlisle is…?" Seth asked.

"In his office," I replied, following Seth back to Carlisle.

Seth knocked, all polite and everything. "Come in," Carlisle called.

"Hello Carlisle," Seth said, going into the room, "the pack found the scent of a vampire on the far border of our lands, and we didn't know the scent. I was sent over to tell you."

"Are you going to track it?" Carlisle asked

"Jacob's going to send someone, and he was said that if you wanted one of your family members could go as well."

"Alec?" Carlisle asked me, "would you like to go?"

Would I? Definitely! Killing a vampire is just what I need right now. "Sure Carlisle," I respond, very politely.

"Cool," Seth said, "let's go!"