To the 10 or so people still reading this story: thank you for trusting me enough to make the ride worth your while.
The day after talking to Janae on the phone, Piper found herself on a plane bound for Milan. She'd informed Diane that she was going to visit Alex, stating that she'd forgotten to tell her about the trip because she was so busy at school. Piper knew if she'd told the older Vause that her daughter might be in trouble, Diane would've hopped on the next flight to Italy. The blonde swore to herself that if she couldn't make progress in a few days, she'd send a plane ticket to Alex's mom herself.
There were too many thoughts crowding her mind to focus on a singular one. Would she inform Alex of her pregnancy? Would she beg Alex to come home? Would she yell at her ex-lover for dismissing her so thoughtlessly? Would the brunette even admit that her modeling career had ended long before her family knew about it?
Piper closed her eyes and tried to fall asleep on the plane as the mental image of Alex from their glory days entered her mind—ripped gray jeans, fitted leather jacket, Dr. Martens and long, shiny black hair cascading over her broad shoulders. That was the Alex she chose to remember; she had no idea who she'd find in Europe, or if she'd find anyone at all.
The plane landed and Piper remembered taking the bus to downtown Milan years ago with Alex. She followed the signage and had no problem getting to the heart of the Italian city with her small carry-on luggage.
Piper arrived at the steps of her ex-girlfriend's apartment with a heavy heart. The only other time she'd been there was magical, and she'd give anything to return to the way things were back then. After taking a few steadying breaths, she climbed the stairs to the second floor.
Janae greeted her with a hug. "Hey, sorry about all this."
"Any word from Alex?" Piper asked in lieu of 'hello.'
Janae gave her a comforting smile. "She's on her way here."
Piper raised her eyebrows, relief filling her chest like helium in a balloon. "How do you know?"
"She texted me a few hours ago." Janae showed her the text. "She'll probably arrive in a few hours—that is, if she comes here first. No telling where she'll go." Janae took Piper's suitcase. "Let me take that for you. Make yourself at home."
The two talked about what little they knew about Alex's life, and Piper sipped a glass of water slowly, hoping that the jetlag would hold off until Alex made it home. She'd had a few decent hours of sleep on the plane, so if the brunette made an appearance before 9 o'clock that night, Piper figured she'd be in good enough shape to have a difficult but necessary come-to-Jesus conversation.
"You want me to stay here with you?" Janae asked, refilling the blonde's glass.
Piper accepted the water. "Do you have some place to stay if you leave?"
"I have friends I could call right now—no big deal," she offered.
"Maybe that would be best," the blonde admitted. "If Alex doesn't come home tonight, of course, you should come back and we'll figure out a plan."
"Sounds good." Janae went into her room, and Piper threw her head back on the sofa, letting out a long, anxious sigh.
After Janae left the apartment, Piper went into Alex's bedroom and immediately felt a pang in her chest. The room was sparsely decorated: there were two generic art prints hanging on the walls, one of them crooked, and a Navy blue robe on a hook behind the door. Piper opened the closet to see a few pairs of jeans and t-shirts placed on wire hangers, and she removed one faded black shirt, bringing it to her nose and breathing in Alex's familiar scent. It smelled like home.
She noticed a shoebox on the desk and opened it without hesitation. Inside were all of the letters Piper had mailed and three photos of the blonde, now bent at the edges as if someone had clutched them on more than one occasion.
Piper sat on the double bed with a thud and paged through the letters, some of which were dated two years ago. While she couldn't confirm if Alex had read them, they were all still in their envelopes, each one was sliced open.
Piper awoke on the bed an hour later, holding one of Alex's pillows with one hand and one of her letters with the other. She sat up, glanced at her phone, and then walked into the living room with a slight headache. It was going on 8 p.m. and there was no sign of Alex. She'd made Janae promise to call or text if she'd heard anything about the brunette's estimated time of arrival, but Piper didn't hear from Janae that evening.
She decided to take a shower and change into something warmer as the temperature had dropped significantly that night. Piper went back into the brunette's room and grabbed her old NYC hoodie, pulling it over her head. Immediately, she felt closer to her former lover. She noticed Alex's original iPod with its cracked screen next to a small speaker and decided to turn it on. Maybe if she could hear the last song that Alex had listened to, she'd know what mood she'd been in before she disappeared. The blonde took the iPod & speaker into the living room and hit play, and Bono belted the lyrics from One.
Did I disappoint you?
Or leave a bad taste in your mouth?
You act like you never had love
And you want me to go without.
She hit the back button to see what playlist the song was from and discovered a list called, "Anguish." Piper's hand flew to her chest as it physically upset her to know that Alex was hurting possibly as much as she was. Once again Piper thought of what she'd say upon seeing her ex-girlfriend, but she knew it was useless to plan that kind of greeting. Whatever would come out of her mouth would likely be truthful, and more than likely, painful.
Alex stumbled down the sidewalk leading to her apartment, exhausted from 48 hours of train travel and very little sleep. She hoped that Janae wasn't home so that she didn't have to hear her long string of questions, starting with, "Where the fuck have you been?" Alex had only sent half a month's rent and had no idea how she'd come up with the other half, but that night, she didn't want to deal with questions that required fessing up to the fucked up choices she'd made.
She lugged her suitcase up the flight of stairs to her apartment and heard music coming from inside. She put her ear against the paper-thin door. There was a familiar song playing, but she couldn't place it at first. Alex positioned her ear further to the right and realized that was her music—the only genres that Janae listened to were jazz and hip hop. This was some kind of indie rock.
Alex was grateful that she hadn't lost her keys on her drugged-out trek across Spain. She shoved the silver key into the lock, turned the knob and opened the door.
There in her apartment no more than ten feet away stood Piper Chapman.
She shook her head as if she was hallucinating. "Piper? Wha…" she choked on the one syllable word.
I told you the words and then knew it was a lie
I wish I could offer an appeal
You're wrong
I don't belong to you
As the crescendo of the song blasting through the mini-speaker built, Piper moved towards her, each step quicker than the previous. "Alex," she breathed before wrapping her arms around the brunette and burying her face in the crook of her neck.
The drums beat in rapid succession and the violins hummed faster as Alex threw her arms around the woman in front of her. One hand rested on the back of the blonde's head as Alex smashed Piper's face against her neck.
What I'd give for that first night when you were mine
Tried with all that I have to keep you alive
I wasn't taught this way, with a thousand things to say
I was born with a broken heart
Alex felt like she was dreaming the scene playing out in her living room—this was impossible. There was no way Piper was in her apartment in Milan—she figured it must have been a tantalizing high she was on in some foreign country. She squeezed her eyes shut as a hundred images of her and Piper from long ago scrolled through her mind. It was like stories she'd read about when someone dies, their life flashes before their eyes in a string of animated memories. For a moment, Alex wondered if she was actually dead—it wouldn't be that far-fetched.
She opened her eyes and blinked rapidly. They pulled back at the same time, each grabbing the other's face, palms splayed on cheeks. Piper looked at Alex's lips, and the brunette did the same. In an instant their mouths crashed together, pressing so hard it hurt.
Piper angled her head, making it easier for Alex to kiss her properly. After several seconds, the brunette pulled back, a little out of breath. She ran her hands down the sides of Piper's head. "I can't believe this…What are you doing here?"
Piper's hands journeyed reassuringly down her arms, resting on the crook of her elbows. "I heard you might've needed me."
"God." Alex's eyes welled with tears as she grabbed the woman in front of her again, yanking her into another tight embrace. "You have no idea," she said in a thick, wet voice.
Piper was the one who pulled back this time, looking at Alex's face as if she was reading a map. "I'm here." She wiped tears off the brunette's cheeks, paying no mind to her own that were cascading down her face.
Nothing in the world mattered at that moment—a bomb could've gone off or there could've been a 10.0 magnitude earthquake—nothing could have kept her from holding on to Piper as if her life depended on it; and in many ways, it did. They could've stood in each other's arms for a minute or an hour—Alex had no concept of time.
Finally, Piper took her hand and pulled her to the sofa. "Do you want something to drink?"
"This is my place, shouldn't I be the one offering you something?" Alex asked somewhat embarrassingly.
"It's ok. I've been here for a few hours." She went into the kitchen and pulled two bottles from the refrigerator "Water or beer?"
"Definitely not beer." The brunette removed her glasses to dab the tears hanging on her eyelashes. "Not for a while, anyway."
Piper walked back over to the sofa and handed her the water. "Have you been drinking?"
Alex let out a thin, incredulous laugh—as if any response she'd give would sound outlandish. "Not today, but recently, yes." She sniffed and her head wobbled. "I don't even know where to start." She placed her eyeglasses back on. "This is still so surreal. I feel like I'm going to wake up, and you'll be gone."
Piper grabbed her hand, looked her in the eyes and said very slowly, "I'm not leaving without you."
The brunette had to look away, feeling like she didn't deserve Piper's visit to essentially save her. Another set of tears rolled down her face and she felt her chin wrinkle. She was this close to a full-on meltdown. "How are you even here?"
"Janae called," Piper admitted, handing Alex a Kleenex. "She was worried sick about you."
Alex huffed, feeling the wet saline in her mouth. She knew her roommate would've been torn about whether or not to contact Piper. If Janae hadn't, Alex had no idea what she would've done upon arriving back in Milan.
Piper looked at her lap, seemingly trying to hide the tears in her own eyes. One dripped onto her leg, and it wasn't lost on Alex. "I called our parents and told them I was coming."
"My mom must've had a field day with that," she tried for a laugh, but it came out more like a wet gasp. The brunette used the pad of her thumb to wipe a dangling drop from Piper's chin.
"She doesn't know about Janae's call." The blonde leaned forward slightly as if Alex's simple touch wasn't enough. "I'm sure your mom knows something up, but I didn't want to alarm her before I knew exactly what I was dealing with."
Alex looked at the ceiling, trying to keep the rest of her tears from slipping out of their lids. "There's so much I have to tell you."
"You don't have to say anything right now." Piper picked up her hand and caressed her knuckles. "We can go to sleep and talk about it in the morning."
The brunette nodded, trying to keep the words that were biting at her lips from pouring out. It was no use—her brain wasn't cooperating with her vocal chords. "Please, don't leave me."
"I'm not going anywhere, Alex." She put her hand behind Alex's neck, and the brunette saw a confidence she'd never witnessed before in Piper's eyes. "Not without you."
They stood at the same time, and Piper turned off the iPod before following Alex to the bedroom.
Alex was broken—there was no other word to describe her. She'd lost at least 20 pounds, had bags under her eyes, and her cheeks were sunken in as if she hadn't eaten a balanced meal in weeks. There was something skittish about her like a frightened, malnourished kitten, but the light in her eyes wasn't completely diminished. Even for a split second, Piper saw life in them, and that's all she needed. The fact that Alex was alive was all that mattered.
Piper unzipped her bag and pulled out a pair of snowflake pajama pants. "I hope you don't mind; I borrowed your sweatshirt."
"I see that." Alex issued a tiny smile. "And, no, I don't mind."
The blonde retreated to the bathroom to wash her face and brush her teeth. It had been a long 24 hours, but she was immensely happy to just be in the same room with Alex.
As she finished gargling, Piper wiped her mouth and saw Alex's reflection in the mirror. The brunette gave her an almost imperceptible smile, and then wrapped her arms around her from behind. Piper stared at both of them in the glass, remembering a time when they were both so young and vibrant. Now they were only shadows of their former selves.
"Take your time," the blonde said, squeezing Alex's hands and letting go. She padded back to the bedroom, quickly shooting a text to Janae. Alex walked in, and Piper swiveled her neck but didn't quite look at her.
She'd put on blue, plaid pajama pants and a white t-shirt. "Text my mom if you want—let her know everything's alright."
Piper had every intention of making this easy for Alex that night; the next day was another story. "Ok."
Alex crawled into bed and sighed. She flung one arm over her eyes. "I forgot what it feels like to go to bed sober."
Piper glanced at her, but didn't say anything. She sent a text message to her father and Diane, promising that they'd call the next day. She was confident Diane would appreciate the quick communication. She leaned over and turned off the lamp on the bedside table. "Good night, Alex."
The brunette reached around Piper's waist and pulled her closer, making them the perfect spoons. "Thank you for being here…" she paused. "Babe."
Piper squeezed her forearm and then closed her eyes, basking in Alex's embrace (and the fact that she'd called her babe.) The way they held each other that night was like two people floating on a small raft in the middle of the ocean—there was no way either woman would let go. Piper tried to categorize every touch on her skin, knowing that after they both aired everything out, that might very well have been the last time they held each other so close.
If you're so inclined, listen to the song "Belong" by Cary Brothers so you can feel what I felt while writing the reunion scene. There are moments in some of my stories when I can so clearly picture the scene I've written, and when I listen to "Belong," I can picture Piper and Alex seeing each other for the first time in months and not being able to stop themselves from hugging and kissing despite being officially broken up.