Chapter 10: Please come back

Santana was standing at her locker, looking over to Brittany who was talking to Quinn. The both spent a lot of time together lately and Santana didn't like that.

They were laughing and Quinn touched Brittany's shoulder slightly. Santana grimaced and felt an unpleasant feeling in her stomach.

Brittany was her best friend not Quinn's.

"Hey Tan", she heard a well known voice behind her.

"Hi", she answered without turning around.

"Oh...okay. You're not even looking at me?", the voice grumbled annoyed.

Santana sighed, turned around and smiled at her boyfriend with an overly nice smile. "Better?", she asked sarcastically.

Darren rolled his eyes. "Moody day...again?"

Santana just shrugged her shoulders. She didn't want to talk to Darren. She wanted to stare at Brittany again and stab Quinn in her thoughts.

"Wanna do something after school", Darren asked with a smile, "We could go to my place"

"Okay", she tried to give her voice a nice sound. Darren didn't do anything wrong. It wasn't fair to be bitchy at him even if it was hard for Santana to control her feelings, "See you later then. Should we meet at the parking lot?"

"Okay, see you", he leaned down and kissed her quickly.

When Santana turned around again, Quinn was gone and instead there were standing two guys near Brittany. Santana didn't really know those two, but from their body language, Santana was sure, they were looking for trouble.

Of course, Brittany didn't see it. She walked towards them with a smile.

"Hey, can you help me?", she asked friendly, "I have math now but I totally forgot where the class room is"

The guys smirked mean. "Oh, is that so? Lucky for you, it's right here", one of them pointed at a door behind them.

Santana narrowed her eyebrows. The guys obviously tried to make a fool of Brittany. Behind that door was the janitor's closet.

"Are you sure?", Brittany asked confused, after she opened the door, "Because it looks different than usual"

The two boys burst out in laughter. "Such a smarty"

It happened only very rarely lately that someone was actually mean to her. People were laughing from time to time, but in general they didn't care if Brittany gave strange answers during class. They liked her. If something happened, of course Santana was always there for her, but mostly she had to do nothing. Brittany had always defended herself lately. So Santana didn't worry as she saw the two guys, even if she would prefer to run towards them and beat them up.

Brittany looked slightly to her side and surprising for Santana her body sank down and she lowered her head. She allowed that the both make fun of her without defending herself.

"Leave her alone Beagle Boys!", Santana now yelled at them. Even if Brittany hated her, she would never stop protecting her.

The two guys just laughed.

"Oh don't play innocent", one of them said, "As if you don't think she's stupid"

Santana made a fist and stormed towards them, but as she saw Brittany's face, she stopped and her heart ached. Brittany looked so hurt. Santana turned towards her.

"You know it's not true", she tried so say, but Brittany had already lowered her head, pressed her books closer to her body and ran away.

"Britt", Santana shouted after her, but she didn't turn around.

Santana lowered her shoulders and dragged herself in the classroom, completely forgotten the two guys who where still standing in the hallway.

"Santana?"

She turned around and looked into the face of her boyfriend.

"Can we talk?", he asked shyly.

"About what?", she had a bad feeling. This question meant almost never anything good.

"Where were you yesterday? We wanted to meet after school at the parking lot, remember?", he seemed a little bit pissed.

Santana grimaced apologetically. "I forgot. Sorry"

"And you didn't answer your phone the whole day", he added.

"I..", she started, but didn't finish the sentence.

The truth was, she didn't answer the phone and she didn't come to the date, because she wasn't in the mood to see anybody. Except for Brittany of course, but that wouldn't happen.

"And it's not just that", Darren looked at his feet and then back in her eyes. "You're...distant lately. You seem sad, but I don't know why and you don't let me in"

"I'm not sad", she just answered, avoiding his eyes.

"See?", he sighed, "You're always pretending everything is fine, but it's not. I want to help you but I can't if you don't talk to me. In fact you're barely even talk to me about anything lately. It is because of the...you know...sex-thing?", he now whispered, "We can totally wait if you're not ready. I told you so"

Santana rolled her eyes and blushed slightly. "It has nothing to do with that"

"Then what is it?", his voice became louder, "You're completely trapped in your thoughts sometimes. You don't talk to me, you don't listen to me. I can't do this anymore"

"Look! If you wanna break up with me, break up with me", she flamed at him, felt backed into the corner.

He looked at her emotionless. "Yeah...maybe it's for the best", he finally said, turned around and walked away.

Santana didn't stop him, but her heart sank. Now she had also chased away Darren.

When Santana got on the field, Quinn and Brittany were already there, warming up for the cheerleader training. Brittany spotted Santana and for a moment it looks like she wanted to wave with her hand, but then her face got a sad expression and for a moment she just stared at Santana.

Santana stared back. She wanted to run towards her, pull her into her arms and never let go.

She missed the sleepovers, she missed the talks about everything and nothing, she missed Brittany's funny little stories why bananas are yellows and giraffe necks so long, she missed her smile, her smell, her hugs. She missed her.

She just couldn't stand it any longer. Tears crawling into her eyes and before anybody could see this, she turned around and ran towards the locker room.

"Sanny?"

The kind, warm voice of Brittany lead to another loud sob from Santana. She sat on the ground of a shower cubicle, her face covered with her hands.

"Are you crying?", she heard Brittany asked and a second later she could see her legs in front of her.

Santana raised her head slowly and looked at her.

"Oh Sanny", Brittany whispered, sat down next to her and pulled her into her lab.

Santana sobbed again and leaned her head against Brittany's shoulder. Her pleasant smell of strawberries and vanilla poured into her nose and Santana's hands clung to Brittany's uniform.

"I'm so sorry Britt. Please! I never wanted to hurt you. Please believe me. I don't think you're stupid. You know that, right?", she sobbed in despair, "Please don't be mad anymore. I miss you so much"

Santana didn't care about the fact, that she was crying in public. She made herself weak and vulnerable, but in this moment it didn't matter. She just wanted her best friend back.
"You miss me?", Brittany asked in a low voice.

Santana nodded.

Brittany pulled her closer. "I miss you too"

For a moment nobody said anything and Santana's sobbing finally came to an end.

"It hurt so much hearing this words coming out of your mouth", Brittany broke the silence.

Santana raised her head and looked at her, regret written all over her face. "I know and I'm so sorry. You have to believe me. I didn't mean any of this. I was just so scared.."

Brittany frowned. "Why scared?"

Santana shook her head, but didn't say anything.

Brittany leaned her forehead against Santana's temple. "Why are you scared about anything? You're the most awesome and strong person in the world. You fight against two head taller guys even if they're in the majority."

Santana made a voice, half laughing half sobbing. "Yeah but losing you would hurt much more than get beaten up by some guys", she whispered.

Brittany looked here into the eyes. "You're scared to lose me?"

Santana cleared her throat and just nodded, a single tear went down her cheek.

"Honey", Brittany pulled her closer to her again, "You are so important to me. I never want to leave you"

They heard footsteps and looked up surprised.

"Oh I'm sorry", Quinn rambled and looked at them slightly confused. Santana still sat on Brittany's lab on a shower cubicle floor, now both with tears in her eyes must been a weird picture.

For a moment they just stared at each other.

"I'll tell the coach that you need a few more minutes", Quinn finally said with a smile and turned around.