May 4th 2013
David watched helplessly as the casket containing his wife's body was slowly lowered into the ground. He closed his eyes, trying to make sense of the events of the past few days. He had finally admitted his feelings toward Regina and had been ecstatic when he had learned she felt the same way. He had been looking forward to start a life with her but their happiness had been short-lived. Regina had been framed for murder… by her own mother. David shuddered at the thought of Regina as Cora's prisoner.
Everything had happened so fast. He had taken Regina for a walk in the woods. Upon their return to the cabin, Regina had wanted to talk to her son. After looking for his cell phone for ten minutes, he had decided to check the car. His phone must have slipped from his pocket when he was moving their supplies inside. He had been surprised to find twenty-five missed calls from his daughter. Not willing to worry Regina further, he had returned Emma's call outside.
David breathed deeply and gently squeezed his daughter's hand. He was being selfish. They all had lost part of their family but he could not grieve for Snow while the woman he loved was in danger. And the fact that nobody seemed to care about Regina angered him. He knew this was not the place nor the time to sort through the events of the past few days but he could not help it. His mind always drifted back to the one horrifying truth: Regina was with Cora.
Emma's heart was breaking for her father. They had come back too late to save Regina and she felt partly responsible for it. They had not wasted any time once in New York. They had found Rumple's son, Baelfire, within a few hours; to Emma's shock and anger. She had been confronted with a past she had wanted to forget. She had hoped to never see the man who had let her take the fall for their robbery and had knocked her up. But fate could be so cruel.
Emma's anger had only increased the more time she had spent with the man she had known as Neal. He had seemed to know a lot about her and the curse. Although he had promised her he did not know when they had met, Neal had discovered her true identity soon after the robbery went wrong. August had payed him a visit and convinced him to let her take the fall so she would be given the opportunity to turn her life around. And she had taken that opportunity. While in jail she had learned the bondswoman trade. Her life had been better for it but she still could not forgive Neal for his betrayal. The same way that Henry could not forgive her for lying to him about his father.
Although Henry had been excited to meet his biological father, he had also been confronted with the realization that his fairy tale family was far from perfect. Emma had lied to him and the lines between good and evil were far blurrier than he had ever imagined. Henry had wanted to go back to Regina, to his mother. And Emma had agreed. She should have never left Storybrooke in the first place. Her family was there and her father needed her help. She had held her side of the bargain and she had only wished to put as much distance between her and her former lover.
But Neal had had other ideas in mind. He had wanted to be a part of Henry's life and had therefore decided to go back to Maine with them. Emma had made it clear that she could not prevent him from coming with her but a relationship with his son would only be possible if his mother agreed to it. And as far as she was concerned, there would be no relationship between the two of them. The warnings had not deterred Neal in the slightest as he had started packing his bags.
They probably would never know if it was the fear of losing his son or the joy of finding a larger family that had motivated Rumple. But for once in his life, the Dark One had told them the truth. He had confessed his suspicions about Cora and his plans to leave Storybrooke so she could never find him. Belle had left the room, wanting to be alone. She still was not used to Rumple's selfishness and the truth had hurt her deeply. Neal had just laughed the incident off. He was used to his father's cowardice.
The family had been on the next flight home. Unfortunately, they had been too late. Cora had what she had come looking for: her daughter. Emma and Henry had been left with dealing with the pieces of David's broken heart while Rumple had been preparing for an attack. Whether Regina had followed her mother willingly may be of interest to the Prince but the fact remained that the mother-daughter duo was more powerful than he was.
David's attention focused back in the present when he felt Emma pull away from him. She first helped Henry with the shovel before scooping some dirt herself. David was next and he murmured a few words of apology to his wife. The family watched as the people present followed their lead. Half the town had come to their beloved princess' funeral and Granny had organized a wake at the diner. David sighed. All he wanted was to find Regina. He did not have time for decorum.
David ducked away from the crowd and walked purposefully toward his truck. A hand on his forearm stopped him from climbing into the cabin. "Where do you think you're going?"
David looked directly into his daughter's angry eyes. "To the station. We must have missed something."
"David, your place is here. With this people. With us. You need to take time to grieve."
David kicked the door of his car. Emma now knew where she got her hot temper from. "And I don't want to be grieving for the woman I love."
"Cora won't kill Regina."
David chuckled. "We only have the Dark One's words for proof."
Emma shook her head. "She had several opportunities to do so. And she didn't. She needs Regina and we need to figure out why."
"That's one more reason to find Regina. She will be able to tell us."
"Rumple has tried to find her. But wherever she is hiding with Cora is being protected by magic."
"Then maybe it's time to use a brute force approach to the situation. We can go knock on every door. We can ask people to help us." David waved his arms toward the crowd.
"And let them end up like Joe and Frank?"
David closed his eyes. They had one more problem to deal with: George. He had been adamant about Regina's culpability in these crimes and had asked for her head. Apparently burning her alive was not enough for the man. But after they had recovered the surveillance video from the station, they had possessed the needed proof to Regina's innocence. At the time Frank had been killed, Regina was being stitched up without anesthesia at the hospital. The man had been so proud of torturing the Evil Queen that he could not be stopped from bragging about it. David sighed before re-opening his eyes and answering his daughter. "So what do you suggest?"
"We help Rumplestiltskin defeat Cora. But first, we go to the wake and try to keep everyone in town from panicking."
David groaned but finally nodded.
EC
Regina used all the self-control she possessed to not run toward her family. Her heart broke at the sight of Henry and David watching the coffin being lowered into the ground. She wanted to be with them, to support them. But she could not take the chance. If her mother caught her, she would kill them both and Regina would not let that happen. She had followed her mother to protect them and she would not endanger them futily.
Regina did not know how long she would need to hide. After taking her to the pirate's vessel, her mother had healed her and with some of her strength back, Regina had been able to access some of her magic; enough to perform simple spells but not nearly enough to win a fight against her mother.
She watched as David hugged Emma, a tinge of guilt tugging at her heart. She had taken his daughter from him and no amount of apologies would give him the precious moments he had lost. Regina waited until everyone left the cemetery before walking toward her stepdaughter's grave. "Hello, Snow."
Regina placed her gloved hand on top of the cold stone. She had never imagined this would be the way their relationship ended. "My mother gave me back my journal." Tears of anger fell down her cheeks. "I hated you. I hated you for getting Daniel killed." She took a shaky breath. "But you know who I hated more? …. Myself." Regina snorted. "I hated myself because despite the fact that you had ruined my life, I also loved you. I was forced to spend time with you but in the end, I still loved you."
Regina took a few steps back. "I wanted to believe that you did not know. You didn't know what your father was doing to me. And I was trying to hold on to the belief that I should not blame you for your father's sins. I didn't want you to know the monster he really was." Her eyes dried up and her expression hardened. "But you did. I don't know how you got my journal but you read it. Your tears stained the pages. See, at that time in my life, I had no tears left to shed... Did you hate me that much, Snow? Did you hate me enough to ignore my cries? You could have helped me. But you chose to ignore me, you chose to let me suffer so you could save the image of the perfect family."
Regina fisted her hands. "I can't forgive you, Snow. I may be a bad person for not being able to but I cannot forgive you for blabbing my secret to my mother and I cannot forgive you for not reaching to me when I needed you to. But I don't hate you anymore. I thought that hate and revenge would give me my happiness. But it did not. Love did. Henry showed me that I could still love unconditionally, something that I thought you had taken from me." She swallowed hard. "And then there is David. He truly loves me. And I love him." Regina kneeled on the ground. "I don't want him to suffer. I want him to remember you as the kind-hearted woman you'd become in all the years I chased you. So I will keep your secret." Regina grabbed some dirt and let it slowly fall in-between her fingers on top of the fresh pile. She pulled the last page of her journal out of her pocket and buried it in the dirt. "Goodbye, Snow." Regina slowly stood up before poofing herself back to Hook's ship.
EC
Red was walking toward her car with her Granny. They had agreed to host the wake at the diner and they needed to hurry back to get everything in order. Red kept looking for her keys in her pocket. Finally, she threw her hands in the air. "They must have fallen out of my pocket when I reached for the shovel. I'll go back and look."
Red used her werewolf's speed to run back toward Snow's grave. She stopped in her tracks when she saw the brunette kneeling by the freshly-dug pile of dirt. Red hid behind a tree and watched as Regina talked to the tombstone. Red was conflicted. On one hand, she needed to get David and Emma but on the other hand, she wanted to give the woman some private time to grieve. She watched as Regina buried a piece of paper in the dirt but before she could call her name, the woman disappeared in a cloud of purple smoke.
When Red reached the grave, she promised herself she would only look for her keys. Whatever that piece of paper was, it had been meant to be given privately. She found her keys next to the shovel and she started toward her car. But her curiosity won over her resolution. She dug the piece of paper out and read it quickly. Her eyes immediately filled with tears.
Granny immediately sensed her granddaughter's mood. It was not only grief. She could feel the anger simmering at the surface. "Red, what's wrong child?"
Red did not respond. Instead, she handed the piece of paper to her Granny. The old woman put her glasses on to read the content.
"I have a fever. The new doctor says it's the Blaze. Leopold has ordered his guards to escort me to the furthest tower and leave me there to die. The doctor tried to convince him to let me stay in my room, where I will be more comfortable. But Leopold was afraid that my pained screams will alert Snow. I'm scared. Not of dying. But I'm scared of the pain.
Before leaving the doctor looked at me as if I was already dead. What he did not know is that I died the night Leopold claimed me as his Queen."
Granny gasped and looked at his granddaughter. "We need to find Charming."
EC
When Regina reappeared on the ship, her mother was there to welcome her. Cora smirked. "So how is the shepherd?"
Regina feigned her indifference. "I don't know, mother. I haven't talked to him."
Cora's eyes narrowed. She always had been able to tell when Regina was lying. Her eyes would always betray her. Regina tried to keep her expression neutral. She needed to keep walking the fine line of semi-truths. "Where were you?"
"In my vault. I needed some ingredients." It was not a lie either. Regina had stopped by her vault on her way to Snow's funeral.
"What did you need?"
"Some herbs. Your healing talents have room for improvement." She still was not lying. Regina had used a balm to fully heal herself.
Cora ignored her daughter's attempt to anger her. In fact, she doubted anything would put her in bad mood today. After two weeks of careful planning, they were finally ready. "I hope you're feeling better dear."
Regina looked at her mother carefully. Cora's overly sweet tone was never a good omen. "I am, Mother. Thank you for asking." The role of the obedient daughter did not suit her and Hook could not help but chuckle at the false politeness between the two women. He was finally about to get his revenge against the crocodile and he did not care much for the mother-daughter bonding he had been subjected to in the past few days. Regina's eyes narrowed. Hook had always been an overconfident fool but today he was more so than ever. Combined with her mother's good mood, Regina sensed the immediate danger. "What is it, mother?"
Cora smiled. "I will finally be able to give you everything you deserve."
Regina snorted. "The only thing I want and deserve is your love, Mother. Unfortunately, you're incapable of such."
"I love you Regina."
"You have a funny way of showing it."
Cora swallowed. They had this conversation multiple times already and she was rapidly losing her patience. "I know I showed it in all the wrong ways."
Regina laughed. "You abused me, Mother."
"I wanted to make you strong. I wanted to make sure you would not have to go through the same hardships I had known. I wanted something better for you. Isn't it what a mother's love is about?"
Regina shook her head. Her heartless mother had no idea what love was. She herself had to learn to love. But her heart had been able to guide her and soon she had understood her role as a mother. "No, Mother. You had your own agenda. You wanted the power and YOU used ME to get it."
"Regina, I…"
"You wanted to be Queen! But since it was impossible for you to ascend that far, you made sure that I would." Regina felt the dread at the pit of her stomach. She had never thought about it before but suddenly it all made sense. She could see her mother's plan clearly now. "You killed Queen Eva!" Cora's silence was as good as her admission. Regina continued. "And you are responsible for the runaway horse. You just had to make sure that I would be there to save the princess. You used me. You used my love for Daniel against me!"
"Do not take this tone with me, Regina! I did what I had to do to ensure your success."
"My success? But Mother, I never wanted to marry the King! You did." Cora stayed silent. She needed Regina for her plan to succeed so she would give her the time she needed for her little scene. "Do you know what Leopold did to me? He RAPED me!"
Cora's patience had reached its limit. "Oh, Regina, enough." She moved her hand in a dismissive gesture. "You performed your duty as the Queen! Back in our land, a woman had to learn to please her husband in bed to gain power. I would have taught you how if you hadn't banished me to Wonderland."
Regina's mouth was opened in shock. "He left me bleeding night after night. I was too young to carry his children! But when I grew older, the damage had been done! I will never be able to have a child, Mother!"
"And whose fault is that? You took that potion!"
Regina shook her head, remembering how her mother had tricked her into believing she had returned to help her find True Love. She laughed. "I never took an infertility potion, Mother. It was just colored water. I did not have to. Leopold damaged me beyond repairs." The statement was true in more ways than one.
Cora shook her head. Her daughter would not ruin her day. "It doesn't matter anymore, Regina. Because today…." She turned toward Hook and the black scarf he was holding. "Today…. I will get everything I ever wanted. And you will stand by my side."
Cora removed the scarf from the object it was hiding. Regina gasped as she recognized the Dark One's dagger. Her mother's motives were worst than she had ever imagined. Regina shook her head as she watched the mad woman smile at the dagger. "Today we will have everything, Regina. And we will take it from the man who took power away from us."
Before Regina could protest, Cora poofed all of them to the diner.
ECECEC
April 15th 2013
Archie watched the former mayor of Storybrooke pace the length of his office. They were making progress; Regina had finally opened up with some of her darkest secrets. Archie could not help but feel sorry for her. She never had an easy life. Everyone she had met had manipulated her to advance their own agenda. Her fall to the darkness had been unavoidable and Archie was impressed she had managed to hold onto her humanity for this long. He was even more impressed by her path toward redemption. He just hoped that Henry could see it as well.
For the past half hour, they had been talking about the man that was responsible for much of the Evil Queen. And Regina could feel the anger warming the pit of her stomach. She despised the man. She despised everything he had done to her. Yet, he had given her freedom, or at least he had taught her how to be free and independent. "Rumple was a bully. His lessons were stringent at best, painful most of the time." Regina closed her eyes, remembering the time he had asked her to crush a unicorn's heart. She had refused. Her heart was still full of love for the man she had kept frozen in time inside a glass coffin. Her mother had been wrong. Love was strength and it had given her the strength to cast her first successful spell. She had been able to preserve Daniel's body six months after his death. But Rumple had needed Daniel to teach her a lesson. She had not known at first. She had not known the role he had played in Daniel's ultimate death.
Archie watched carefully as Regina stopped pacing. Her head was held low and she was lost in her past. The way her body was slightly hunched over confirmed they were not pleasant thoughts. After the breakdown she had suffered in his office a month ago while talking about her mother, he knew he had to tread carefully. She had not come back for another session until now and he did not want her to turn down his help once more.
Besides, he was hoping he could talk to her about David. Although they were both denying their growing feelings for each other, it was obvious to anyone in town that the pair had become a lot more than simple co-parents. They went from the divorced couple bickering about everything to the young lovers going on their honeymoon. Archie took a steadying breath before prompting her further. "Regina?" Regina re-opened her eyes and turned her head toward him. He gave her a soft smile. "Do you want to talk about it?"
She knew perfectly what the 'it' was referring to. But she was not ready. Regina shook her head. "No."
Archie closed his eyes briefly. "Regina, I'm here to help you." When the woman did not react, he pressed on. "But you already know that. That's why you came back."
Regina did not move. She had resisted coming to Archie in the first place. But the sessions had helped her stay away from magic. Archie had been right, stopping using magic was much harder than starting it. At times, she had felt like a junkie needing her next fix and being in this office had helped. When she had decided to resume her sessions with Archie, she had hoped she would be able to find the same calm. Her relationship with her son was improving but she had to leave town. If the pain in her side was any indication, she needed medical attention.
Regina was afraid. She was afraid to lose David. Once he knew of her deception, he would leave her alone, preventing her to see Henry. She had lied to him several times already but this was the biggest lie of all. She was pregnant with his child. She opened her mouth to confess to Archie but stopped herself. She already knew what he was going to say. And she did not need to hear it.
Archie tried to decipher the thoughts clouding her mind. "Regina?" The brunette raised her head to face him directly, except she was not looking at him. Her eyes were fixed on a point behind him. "Regina?"
Suddenly, Regina reached for the letter opener lying on Archie's desk. The doctor stood and tried to get her away from the knife but he was too late. Regina had cut half of her wrist open. She smiled as she showed him her work. Archie grabbed some of the tissues he kept close to his patients. He needed to put pressure on the wound and get her to a hospital immediately.
Regina laughed at his feeble attempt. She held her hand over her wound and healed herself magically. Archie shook his head. "You can't do this to yourself! Even if you can heal it. Regina, …"
She cut him off. "You know how long it took me to master this?" Archie shook his head, still stunned by her actions. Regina continued. "Almost a month." She chuckled. "Rumple was getting impatient. He would cut my wrist and wait for me to heal myself. But I could not." She tilted her head to the side. "See, healing with dark magic is difficult… Dark magic feeds on negative emotions such as hate and anger. But when you want to heal, these emotions are useless." She remembered Rumple's lesson as if it had happened yesterday. "But fear… fear and pain can be the biggest motivators of all. And so Rumple decided I should learn the art of healing on myself." Regina took a deep breath, trying to hold back the tears. The lessons had been painful but strangely they had not been the most painful of all. "At first, he would cut my wrist and wait for me to heal myself. When I couldn't, he would do it himself. As the weeks stretched on and I was not getting any better at it, he lost his patience."
Regina closed her eyes, the day still vivid in her mind. "I was supposed to have a lesson with him since the King would be gone for at least two weeks with Snow. I met him in the woods at our usual spot. As soon as I dismounted, he poofed us on top of the mountains. I… I wasn't dressed for the cold… and I yelled at him to get us back." Regina wrapped her arms tightly around herself, the same gesture one would make to conserve body heat. "I was so stunned that I didn't try to poof myself back to the castle. Before I could protest, Rumple had magicked himself a sword and cut my back in half. I… I collapsed on the ground ... I could feel the warm blood gushing out of my wound… I couldn't think straight. But Rumple kneeled besides me and just repeated 'heal yourself'. I was trying but I was growing weaker with every breath. I begged him to heal me but he just shook his head. He told me I was no good to him weak." Regina collapsed on the couch in Archie's office. "I had nothing to look forward to. I hated my life and I had no reasons to heal myself. So I closed my eyes and let it happen. But… but the fear of dying won. I wanted to die but I was too afraid to let it happen. So I healed myself." Regina buried her face in her hands, holding back the tears. "Rumple taught me two lessons that day: healing and that the fear of dying would always win over the desire of not living."
Regina raised her head to look up at Archie. The psychiatrist was speechless. How could one be so cruel? Archie needed to focus on the problems at hand. He knew Regina was self-destructive but he had never imagined she would cut herself willingly. "Regina, you can't keep on hurting yourself." Archie pointed toward her wrist with his chin. Regina chuckled. If only he knew the injuries she had suffered while learning her craft. Archie continued. "And I need to ask you. Are you still not wanting to live?"
Regina averted her eyes. She was unsure on how to answer this question. Archie had convinced her to always tell him the truth since it was the only way he could help her. As much as she had tried to deny it, talking with Archie had helped her. She kept her eyes fixed on the floor as she answered him as truthfully as she could. "I don't want to die… not.. not anymore."
Archie frowned. He did not like the answer. Not wanting to die was not the same as wanting to live. Although she would not try to kill herself intentionally, she would not prevent others to do so and considering the resentment of the townspeople against her, Archie was concerned for her safety. Most importantly, he was worried about the last word she had uttered. "Not anymore? Regina, have you tried…" He kneeled on the floor besides her, trying to look at her. He could always tell when she was lying, her tell was in her eyes.
"David stopped me." Archie closed his eyes and took a deep breath. How could he have missed this?
Regina stood abruptly, not willing to say more on the subject. "I have to go. I have to pick Henry up from school."
Archie gently grabbed her arm. "Not after you just told me you tried to kill yourself."
Regina shook her head and jerked her arm free. "It doesn't matter anymore."
"It does if the reason you tried to take your own life in the first place still exists."
"I'm ok. I need to pick Henry up."
Archie's eyes narrowed. Directly confronting Regina was never a good idea. Besides, David seemed to believe she would not try again and he had to trust the Prince's instinct. Considering his feeling toward Regina, Archie truly believed David would not let anything happen to her. "When will I see you again?"
Regina hesitated. "I'll call."
Archie nodded. "Have a good afternoon with Henry, Regina."
She smiled softly. "Thank you."
EC
Regina was early; the school would not let out for another half hour but she had needed to get out of Archie's office. So she decided to walk to the school and wait for Henry. She had tried to enjoy the walk and although the fresh air had done wonders to calm some of her anxiety, she was unable to steer her thoughts away from Daniel. His death was still a fresh wound on her heart, one she started to think would never heal. Except when she was with David. She shook her head trying to clear her thoughts. David was not exactly a safe subject at the moment. She unconsciously rubbed her hand over her abdomen. She was not showing yet but probably would soon. Most importantly, she needed to make sure that nothing was wrong with her child.
Regina jumped when she heard a man call her name as she had been lost in her thoughts. She turned toward the voice and groaned when she recognized Dr. Whale approaching. He crossed the street to meet her. Regina placed her hand palm out in-between them to stop his advance. "I will use magic, Viktor. I'm in no mood to be tossed around for your entertainment."
The man stopped a few feet away from her. He tried to smile. "I didn't …. didn't come here to fight." In fact, he had not expected to see her. Ever since his conversation with Red on the dock, he had wanted to talk to Regina but had never found the courage to do so. "I… I came here to apologize."
Regina's eyes widened and she dropped her hand to her side. She laughed wholeheartedly. "For what? Tricking me into thinking Daniel was dead? Trying to strangle me? Send a mob after me? Bringing a monster back to life using my fiance?"
Whale looked down. "All of it."
Regina gasped in shock. She had not expected his apology to be sincere but the man seemed to mean it. She shook her head. "No."
"I will understand if you cannot forgive me…."
"No… I just don't believe you."
Whale sighed. "I was not always a bad man. I wanted to bring back the dead…. I wanted to do it for my mother." He closed his eyes. "But I was so focused on the dead that I had forgotten the living…. Someone… someone told me that you cursed us for revenge… but has it ever occurred to you that the cruelest of curses was to break the first one?" He watched the woman's reaction but she had slipped her mask on and her expression was unreadable. "Some of us…. you gave us a blessing. You took away our most painful memories and gave us a life here."
Regina closed her eyes; Jefferson may not necessarily disagree with Whale. The worst curse imaginable was to live with the knowledge to have lost the ones we love. Whale continued. "You gave my life a new purpose. Dr. Frankenstein may have been able to bring back the dead, unsuccessfully. But Dr. Whale can help heal the living, prevent them from dying… and until recently, I did not realize how much of a blessing you gave me when you brought me here. So thank you, Regina."
Regina was stunned. She had not expected a sincere apology from the man yet alone his gratitude. But she could not find the deception she was looking for. As far as she could tell, he was telling her the truth. Whale looked uneasily toward the silent woman. "If you ever need anything… I will help you." Regina brought her hand over her abdomen but remained silent. After a long moment, Whale bowed his head to take his leave. "Have a good day, Regina."
Entering the last part of this fic. Here is a little spoiler for you. The second fic is called the Blaze but it's not set in the Enchanted Forest and won't have flashbacks like this one.