"Come on, Dean," Sam tried to pull him out of his panicked state. "I need you on this...Need you to take some deep breaths, okay? If anyone should be panicking, it should be me. But I'm okay, right? Look at me, Dean. I'm okay." Dean looked at Sam's face, trying to register whether or not he seemed scared at all, about any of this. And when he found nothing but acceptance and willingness to continue, he tried to take the deep breaths his brother had requested of him.
After a few calming moments, Dean defaulted to humor. "So...how is it you know so much about this gay sex stuff?"
Sam let out a scoff, though there was a slight grin on his face. "Anal sex isn't just for gay people, Dean. What, you've never had it with a girl?"
"Of course I have," Dean defended. "It just... ya know, it didn't really turn out how...I would've liked for it to. For her, I mean. Wasn't exactly fun for her. She was actually kinda traumatized by the whole thing, and I never tried it again. With anyone."
"It's not gonna be like that, with me," Sam assured him.
"What, you've done this before?" Dean got an incredulous look on his face.
"I've not...been on the receiving end, no," Sam defended. "But I know the proper way to prep someone for it, and I've done that for myself. You're not gonna hurt me, Dean," he told him. Because he knew exactly what his older brother was most afraid of. "And this isn't gonna hurt us," he added. Because he knew exactly what Dean was a close second afraid of. And as Dean searched Sam's face, Sam knew he'd been right about his fears. "We're doing this because we have to. It'll be...awkward for a bit afterward. If we don't do it, we both die. And that witch keeps going around doing this to a lot more people."
"Damnit," Dean thought. "Damn Sam and his fucking logic. Of course we have to do this. We have no choice. There's...nothing stopping us. If it was just us... well hell. No. Even if it was just about us, I still couldn't let him die. Even if it meant him hating me forever..."
"Dean, we're wasting time," Sam pulled him out of his thoughts. "We should get started." Dean seemed unsure of what exactly to do, at that point. But he gave a small, quick nod to Sam. "You can close your eyes, if you want to," Sam suggested, with a sort of sad smile. "Pretend I'm a girl or something."
"Like that's real fair to you," Dean said through gritted teeth.
"I don't have to be hard," Sam retorted. "That's also kinda why I haven't untied you. All you have to do is sit there and pretend. Maybe also not freak out."
"I'm not closing my eyes, Sam," he told him."Gotta make sure you're okay..." he looked away, off to the side of his younger brother. "Let's just...let's just get this over with, before I start freaking out again."
"Okay," Sam was suddenly a bit nervous; his eyes darting a bit in between them. "Can you um...can you close your eyes for just a minute, then? While I um..."
It took a moment for Dean to get what he meant. "Oh. Right," he nodded and clamped his eyes shut.
Sam swallowed against his suddenly dry throat, then stood from where he'd been crouched in front of Dean, and moved to straddle his brother's legs. He grabbed the small bottle of lube and squatted back down, hovering over Dean's lap, then looked up at his brother's face. "Okay...thankfully, this isn't very cold," he told him, as he snapped the cap open.
Dean's eyes snapped open about the same time, fixing his gaze on the bottle, before he realized where Sam was going to pour it. It wasn't until the liquid hit the head of his dick, and Sam's eyes briefly met with his, right as his hand followed to spread the lube over and down the shaft, that Dean slammed his eyes shut and his head jerked back into the pole. He was torn between how absolutely wrong this was, and how damn good Sam's hand felt...
When he chanced to look again, it was when Sam's hand had stopped, and was simply holding it. Dean's eyes opened on Sam's face, first, realizing that the younger man was looking down, concentrating on his current task. And Dean's gaze lowered, noticing one of Sam's hands was holding his own 'parts', sort of up and away, as he lined Dean's cock up and began lowering himself down onto it.
"Sam..." his voice shaking, he found himself in the beginnings of a panic, again, and Sam looked up. Their eyes met, right as Dean felt himself sinking up into the tight, hot heat of his brother's ass. He watched Sam's face, intently, waiting for any sign of pain. But he found himself distracted, the more Sam sank down onto him. And Sam's face, though his eyes had fallen closed, showed no sign of discomfort. Maybe more fascination, than anything.
It took a couple of minutes, but soon, he was fully seated, sitting on Dean's lap, and he let out a breath. Dean waited, biting down on the inside of his cheek, for Sam to open his eyes. "Sammy, you okay?"
Sam nodded, then slowly opened his eyes and met Dean's. "Just...need a minute," he told him.
Dean gave a short, rapid nod. "Does it hurt?" he couldn't help but ask.
Sam shook his head, "No...no," he said, letting out another breath. "Feels...weird, though."
"Come on, Sam. It doesn't hurt? You're an ass-virgin, and I ain't exactly small. Not tryin' to brag or anything, but..." The corners of Sam's mouth curled up into a grin.
"It stung a bit, at first," Sam admitted. "But like I told you, I prepared myself. It wasn't painful," he assured him. Dean looked at him for a moment, noticing the sincerity in his eyes, and nodded. "What about you?" Sam asked, raising his brows. "Doing okay?"
Dean wasn't sure, at first, how to answer that. "Well sure, Sam! Being balls-deep in your ass is the nicest thing my dick's felt in a long time..." seemed like the wrong thing to say. "Not as horrifying as I'd imagined," he replied with, instead.
Sam let out a small, amused laugh. "Yeah, actually...that's kinda what I was thinking, too," Sam replied.
Dean kinda hoped that meant something more along the lines of what he'd been thinking, as opposed to what he'd said aloud.
"Okay," Sam looked off to the side of them, and carefully leaned over to grab a small cloth he'd laid next to the bottle of lube, and wiped off his hands. Throwing the cloth back down, he met Dean's eyes again, "Ready?" he asked. Dean swallowed, as Sam put his hands on Dean's shoulders. He didn't reply to the question, but Sam seemed to be able to read his face enough to know that it was okay.
Slowly, at first, Sam rose up a bit, pulling off of Dean, maybe a quarter of the way, then sank back down. Dean accidentally allowed a small grunt to escape his throat. Then Sam rose up higher, about halfway off of Dean, and then down again, with more confidence. He started a steady rhythm.
Dean couldn't believe how good it felt. Well, sex generally ended up feeling good. But he couldn't believe that even with the awkward facts that surrounded the situation, he was still so completely turned on. He just about hated himself.
But then, on one of the downward thrusts, Sam made this sound, from somewhere in the back of his throat. His head was slightly fallen back; eyes closed. Dean wasn't sure what compelled him to look down, between them. But what he saw, nearly stopped his breath, and most definitely caused something to heat in his belly. Sam was hard. Like, completely hard, and there was a glistening line of pre-come connecting from the slit on the head of his dick, to the taut skin of his abs.
Dean was breathless as his gaze trailed back up to Sam's face. "Sammy," his voice was lower, now, and Sam opened his eyes, picking his head up a bit to look at him. His lust-blown pupils only intensified what Dean was feeling. Sam seemed almost as lost as he was, in every psychological sense of the word. Lost to the feeling; lost at how much they must be completely messed up, for it to feel this damn good.
Dean's eyes must have conveyed something correctly to his brother, because Sam was suddenly pulling forward, ducking his head in the crook of Dean's neck, where it met his shoulder. Sam's hot and heavy breath spilled warmly against Dean's skin, causing it to tingle and spread over his entire body. And as Sam sped up the pace, there was more than just breath on Dean's skin; there were teeth, grazing soft enough not to cause damage, but rough enough to send a jolt of electricity through him.
"Sam...fuck," Dean said, breathlessly. "Fucking untie my hands," he pleaded. "Just fucking untie them..." And he was grateful that Sam was complying, without arguing, because he didn't think he could go another minute without-
His hands were suddenly free, and he pulled them in front of him, ignoring the slight ache from having been held in that position for who knows how long, and immediately sought to grab onto both sides of Sam's face. He moved him into view, and their eyes met, searchingly, before Dean drew him in and crushed his lips to Sam's.
As tongues collided, teeth lightly tapping together at the new territory, their groans were in unison, and suddenly Sam felt free to use his own hands for something other than balance. The first thing they did, was pull at the rope around Dean's torso, attempting to remove it.
One of Dean's hands moved into Sam's hair, gripping at the back of it, as he deepened the kiss. The other, traveled down Sam's chest, and to his abs, causing Sam to make an approving sound against his brother's lips. Just as the rope fell free, Dean's hand was wrapping around Sam's erection.
Sam had no choice but to pull from the kiss, slightly shocked by the action. He looked down between them to verify Dean's hand stroking his impossibly hard cock. "God...Dean," he breathed, and looked back up at him. "You don't... have to. I don't have to come. Just you. Technically..."
"Hell no, Sam. We're in this together, all the way. Besides..." he pressed his forehead against Sam's, "I wanna see you... Wanna watch you come from my cock," he couldn't believe he'd just said that to his little brother. They were both a little shocked by the words, but then Sam just kind of melted, right there, moaning like an obscene late-night pay-per-view porn star.
And just like that, Dean had a new mission. It was something he'd always done, but not like this. This was completely different from how he'd always done things... Take care of Sammy... Yes, he would take care of his Sam... "Lean back, baby," Dean whispered to him, no longer surprised by anything currently coming out of his mouth.
"What?" Sam looked confused.
"Trust me," Dean replied, guiding him to lay back, slightly, against Dean's bent thighs. Then Dean, with his new-found leverage since the ropes had been removed, thrust his hips up into Sam. Sam cried out, throwing his head back, at the amazing feeling of Dean's cock hitting his prostate with the sweetest perfection. So he did it again, just to hear that sound.
"Yeah...god, Dean...right there," Sam cried out. "Fuck...fuck me..."
"God, Sammy," Dean couldn't hold back the urge any longer anyway. Leaning back against the pole, Dean gripped tightly onto Sam's waist on either side, and began a steady, slightly rough thrusting pattern, being sure to hit that same spot over and over. It didn't take very long before he felt himself getting close. His right hand left Sam's waist and wrapped back around Sam's cock, jerking it in time with his thrusts. "Come on, Sam.. Want you to come with me... So fucking close, baby..."
"Oh god... Oh god, Dean... Gonna...gonna...oh shit. Oh shit! Dean!" he was coming; moderately pitched moans of ecstasy that no longer formed words, accompanied by streams of thick, white stripes of come on his and Dean's thighs.
The sounds Sam made, and the pulsating, tight heat around Dean's cock, threw him over the edge; hips completely losing their rhythm, jerking wildly up into his brother as his filled him... Whether anything legible came out of his mouth, neither of them would ever know...
(to be continued...)