It was early, maybe around 5am when Paul entered my room. He stepped inside with heavy footsteps, knowing I was already awake.
"I messed up Bella," he said coming to sit down. Under his eyes were dark circles and he looked worn and tense.
"What happened?" I wondered. He seemed a bit surprised about my reaction. I hadn't talked to anyone for a while. Rose must not have told them about our deal. He looked at me with tear filled eyes.
Scooting closer, I pulled him down and made him lay beside me. I put my head on his shoulder and curled myself around his body, giving my Pack brother all the comfort he needed. Tears fell down his cheeks, which I found unusual. Paul was never the one to cry. He was always the strong and tough one- always wanting to deal with the problems on his own.
"What happened?" I asked again, drawing patterns on him.
"She's pregnant," he said with a shaky voice. I froze for a second. Who was pregnant? Paul didn't have an imprint- last time I checked.
"Who?" I wondered calming his shaking body down.
"Her name is 'Lissa," he said. "I- she-…we hooked up and…I don't know. It was a while ago. She- and…"
"Okay," I said softly, not needing the full explanation right now. All that mattered was he was upset.
"Did you tell your mom?" I wondered carefully as he calmed down some more. He nodded and hugged me tight. "She flipped out. And she has every right. I totally screwed up Bella. And Lissa just dumped it on me. I don't know what to do…and I had nowhere to go. My mom was so upset. I was so afraid she was going to turn back to the bottles."
"But she didn't right?" I asked putting my head up. He shook his head, "she said she needed to get out of the house for a while and talk with some other adults. I think she went to Sue's."
I nodded and laid my head back down.
"I couldn't stand being in the house. I just- I hate myself."
"You shouldn't," I said softly, "you created another life. You made something- someone," I clarified.
"Lissa wants nothing to do with the kid when she has him. She wants me to sign adoption forms to give him up."
"Are you going to?" I wondered, pausing again.
"I don't want to Bells. She's carrying my son. I have a son," he said proudly as his voice was thick with tears, "but I can't handle a child. I don't know where to begin. And my mom? She won't be able to handle that kind of stress. You should have seen the look in her eyes when I told her what Lissa said. I- I…"
"First off, I want you to take a breath," I said now scooting up and wiping away his tears. "We are going to get through this, one day at a time," I smiled, thinking of Rosalie.
"Your mom's a strong woman Paul. A kid is not the end of the world. She raised you right- even if you don't believe it. People make mistakes, even you. She's stressed out- yes, but that doesn't mean she loves you any less. She needs time. Even if it's just a little bit."
"What if she hates me?" he asked, his voice cracking.
"She's your mom," I said with kind eyes, "she could never hate you."
"What do I do Bells?" he asked, looking in my eyes. I gave him a reassuring smile. "You would make a good dad you know. I think you could do it."
"Not by myself," he said.
"Who said you would be alone?" I asked with a smile. "You have us- your family. We will be with you every step of the way."
"Its too much to ask- too much for you. I should have-"
"Stop," I said gently, pushing him to the bed. "Nothing is too much. You're going to have a kid in this world Paul, whether you like it or not. And you're a responsible guy. You'll do right."
"I want him Bells, I want to raise him."
"Then you will," I said confidently. "You and I- your mom and the rest of the guys will."
"You don't hate me? Think less of me?" he asked.
"You're Paul- The funny, smart ass, cocky son of a bitch who I love. Even though I don't admire your habits with woman, I know you don't abuse them, or push them. Its just your nature to be a womanizer- and flaunt what you got," I joked. "What happened with Lissa may seem like a mistake, but it made something great. Something that's another part of you."
I snuggled with him again. Ever since Sam, I needed the contact. "I would never think less of you. And I could never hate you. You're the one guy I can go to, to give it to me straight up- tell me what you think, what you feel; I like how that you don't hold back, no matter what happens or who the person is."
I smiled as I thought of that dance we shared at the club. He never held me or touched me like I was the property of Sam. He just did what he felt was natural.
"I'm scared," he admitted. "It's all just…happening so fast. And I just- what id I'm not good enough? Bells, my dad walked out on my mom and I. What if being a dad is harder than I think? My life is going to pass me by!"
"Again, breathe," I reminded. "Look," I said nodding to the window. The sun was starting to rise.
"Take in these little moments. Like right now. I know your antsy and scared, but just look. Look at the sun, watch it shine against the trees and look at how the wind makes everything move. It's a beautiful sight," I said. "There are so many beautiful things in this world- even the little things. And your son is going to be beautiful. Life will change for you and you'll adapt. He's going to be your world Paul. I know it. It's going to be okay."
"How do you know though?" he whispered after a while.
"I just do- I can see it, and feel it. I have so much faith in you. You're going to be great."
He sniffled a bit and hugged me for the longest time.
"Come on, lets get you something to eat," I smiled. He was surprised again as I offered to get out of bed. "Rose talked me through some things and I promised her today would be the day I changed. Sam isn't dead, I need to stop acting like he is and be grateful he's alive and breathing."
Paul smiled at me, which caused me to just feel silly. I hated when people stared especially at me. Grabbing his hands, I pulled him out of bed and made him follow me downstairs.
"Eggs, toast and fruit good?"
He nodded.
"After breakfast, I want you to talk with your mom," I said. "And do the guys know?"
He shook his head, "I haven't phased long enough to tell them."
"When did you find all of this out?" I wondered while cracking some eggs into a bowl.
"Last night, a little before dinner. I told my mom after we were done eating and she went to the Clearwater's. Then I had patrol by myself so it was easy to just stay there in my thoughts."
"Then you came here," I said. He nodded. We talked a bit more. Paul was not going to be alone in this. I promised myself that.
After cooking all the food, I set it in front of Paul and put the extras on the table.
"Bella," Bills said surprised. Both him and Jake were still at our house since Sam hadn't finished their house.
"Morning Uncle Billy," I smiled, leaning down to give him a hug.
"Morning Paul," Billy acknowledge rolling up to the table. I set him out a plate and continued to make some more food. My heart was healing a bit, I could feel it. Being around everyone made it better.
"How are you doing?" Uncle Billy wondered suspiciously.
"Good- better. Rosalie talked some sense into me yesterday. I think I might stop by and see Sam later."
He and Paul both gave me raised eyebrows.
"Hey daddy," I said a few minutes later. I could hear his footsteps in the hallway a ways a way before he even needed to acknowledge his presence.
"Bella," he said surprised. He came over and gave me a long, hard kiss to the temple and cheek. "Don't worry, I'm doing better," I murmured with a smile. I know I worried everyone, and that upset me a bit. I didn't mean to do such a thing.
"How long have you been up?" he asked.
"A while, but I just came down. Paul stopped by to visit so I thought I would make breakfast."
He continued to stare at me, mildly surprised.
"Jake," I said putting some bacon on the men's plate.
"Holy shit. Bells?" he asked rubbing his eyes. I walked over with a hot pan in my hand and gave him a kiss. "Sorry for scaring you."
"You're here…in the kitchen," he said still trying to pull it together.
"Wow, nice one captain obvious," Paul stated. I giggled a bit which caused everyone to look at me.
"And you're laughing," Jake said.
Paul rolled his eyes and gave me a wink. I think Paul's news was helping me move on too. What Rosalie said was right. The Pack needed me- especially Paul now. I couldn't be catatonic Bella. It wasn't fair to him, the guys, or Paul's unborn child.
"I am," I stated with a smile. Going back to the stove, I cooked a bit more for anyone else who would stop by.
"You're sure your okay?" Charlie asked as he came back down to go to work.
"Yea, I think so," I smiled. Giving him a kiss on the cheek, I watched him leave the house. When he was gone, I turned back to the men in the kitchen. "You need to go find your mom and talk to her," I told Paul. He looked slightly nervous but I easily calmed him down with a small squeeze to his shoulder. "It will be fine. Just go see her."
He nodded and got up. "Thanks Bells," he said hugging me.
"I'll be here if you need me."
Leaving my arms, he said goodbye to the Black's and left.
"What's with him?" Jake asked. I shook my head, "you'll find out later."
"Wait…you already know something? What did he tell you?" Jake wondered. I bit my lip. "He came by earlier this morning and was thinking of talking to catatonic Bella. What he didn't know was I was no longer…that. And as for what I know, you will get informed when he is ready."
"But you know," Jake said again.
"Yes," I said in a breath, "I know what is going on."
"Bella," Billy said ready to change the topic, "may I ask how you got out of your…predicament?" he asked.
I nodded; somewhat proud I was out of my scary state. "Rose helped me. She talked some sense into me. I'm not sure I can recite it word for word, but I know what hit me was that Sam isn't dead- and I've been selfishly acting like he is. I'm wasting my time, his, and the Pack's by sitting around moping. I don't want to do that. I don't want to let the days pass me by."
He nodded, somewhat impressed of the vampire too. When breakfast was done, I went to take a nice long hot shower. It was odd to actually feel the pellets of water. When Alice came by to help me clean up, it was like I felt nothing. Odd to be living again.
Stepping out of the bathroom, now fully clothed and dry, I was wrapped up into large warm arms. "Embry," I smiled knowing exactly who it was.
"It's unreal. When Jake said it I just…I missed you," he breathed while hugging me against his chest.
"I'm sorry for giving you such a worry," I said hugging him back.
"As long as you are okay- living, breathing and talking, I can manage. I just- I really missed you."
Smiling, I continued to hug him in the hallway. Yea, I missed him too.
"Come on, there are other people downstairs waiting to see you too," he said tugging on my hand. I let out a little giggle and let him pull me.
"Bella!" Everyone shouted. Collin and Brady got to me first. I felt the guiltiest with them because I always promised to look out for them. Yet, I was being selfish. They each just gave me happy smile though, not seeing a problem with my past actions. Seth pulled me into a hug next, along with Leah on top of him. I let out more laughter. Soon after that, the imprints were hugging me and Quil pulled me in his arms. "Never do that again."
I nodded.
"So…we know," Jared stated while coming to hug me.
"About Paul," Kim said nicely.
"He told us a few minutes ago," Jake said. I raised an eyebrow at all of them. That was great, but where was Paul?
"He's still out talking with his mom," Leah said reading my face. I nodded.
"He showed us you two talking this morning," Seth said.
"I honestly can't wait to have a baby in this huge family," Sarah said kindly. I smiled at her.
"We support him, whole heartedly," Embry said hugging me again.
"Good," I spoke simply. We all chatted for a while till Paul came back in the house. He stood in the doorway, just stunned for a few seconds. All eyes were on him, waiting to see how he was again. Taking in his appearance I went over to hug him. It was good news- I could read it on his face.
"She's okay, she still loves me," he breathed while bending down to hug me, "She wants to help raise him," he sniffled while tucking his face in my shoulder. "It's going to be okay," he said pulling away happily. Tears in his eyes were at bay and I smiled.
"Thank you," he breathed, squeezing my hand.
"You have nothing to thank me for," I said with such happiness as I hugged him again. We all moved to the family room and had some bonding time. It was weird to be without Sam, but he was still in my heart and for now, I was okay with that.
My Pack was happy- just how Sam would want them to be- and that made me happy.
Towards the middle of the afternoon, I made sure to take time to see Sam. I knew a lot of he guys were hesitant, but it was something I needed to do. Driving over to the Cullen's Edward came out and opened my door for me immediately.
"Alice saw you coming," he smiled. I returned the gesture and let him lead me inside. "Are you sure you want to do this?" he asked.
"Yea, I think so," I said, passing Alice and Rose with a smile on my way.
"Bella," Esme said coming to hug me as I reached the second floor.
"I can see your doing better Bella," Carlisle said coming to stand next to his wife.
"Thanks to Rose yea," I grinned. "is it okay if I see Sam?" I wondered. They nodded and each gave me encouraging smiles. "You're always welcome Bella," Esme said.
Thanking her, I opened my boyfriend's temporary bedroom door and let out a little breath. I wasn't sure what to expect when I opened the door but it hit me a bit. It made it harder to see that he was actually in coma than to think it.
"Hey baby," I said coming to sit next to him. I ran my fingertips over his face again. "I miss you so much."
Taking his hand, I kissed it softly. "You've barely been gone a month and so much has happened," I said.
"One of Paul's hook ups is pregnant," I said. "I'm sure you would be flipping right now. You would have that responsibility lecture with him," I laughed just picturing it. "But he's okay. He's going to make it. He's going to be a dad," I said. "Crazy huh? Paul being a dad?"
I sat there wishing for a response but my boyfriend's features were neutral.
"I love you so much," I whispered. Not knowing what else to say, I stood up, kissing his forehead and leaving the room. I shut the door letting out an unsteady breath trying to push my tears away.
"Thought you might want some company on you ride home," Collin said sitting against the wall next to the door. Brady was sitting next to him, smiling at me.
"Hey guys," I smiled opening my eyes as I pulled in my composure. "You didn't have to come."
"We wanted to," Brady said.
"Come on," I told the two. We went back downstairs and found the vampire clan.
"You're doing good," Rose said zooming up to hug me. Brady and Collin stiffened a bit but didn't react.
"Couldn't do it without you," I whispered as we pulled away.
"Come back anytime Bella," Carlisle said as I went to walk away.
'Thanks, I will," I smiled, leaving with my boys.
Every week I went to visit Sam. With the Pack around there was always something happening. Paul just went to go see a sonogram of his baby and Embry had just imprinted.
"Times moving fast," I told Sam. "I swear, Embry is love sick," I laughed, "The girl Andrea and him…you should see them," I laughed, "I thought Jared and Kim were bad. They are like…bunnies and magnets all at the same time," I joked. "They can't seem to stay away from each other."
I kissed Sam's hand, which laid in mine. "God baby, when are you going to wake up?" I wondered more to myself than anything.
It had now been over 4 months since Sam had gone into coma and Paul told me he was going to be a father. Lissa was now 6 months pregnant and a very bitchy person. I had thought Emily was bad, well…Lissa, man I could tell why they didn't have an actual relationship.
"I swear, if any of you women are like this, I am leaving the Pack," Paul groaned. I gave him a sympathetic smile. It was odd that Lissa wanted nothing to do with the baby, but Paul did and he catered to the mother's every need till his son was his. He had just came back from getting her watermelon, a bottle of chocolate syrup and pickles which she wanted from Port Angeles, and Port Angeles only.
"Well next up is Andrea and Embry, so I would be worried about your services with them," I joked. Embry and Andrea were always…busy. And from what I heard from everyone is that he did not have a filter in his head to stop from showing the performances of him and his imprint in the bedroom.
"Don't you two fucking dare," Paul growled at the pair.
"Woah Papa wolf," Leah said as she joined us in the family room. She settled on the couch next to me, ready to watch a movie.
"Popcorn?" I asked to Paul who was getting up to grab a beer. He let out a moan, which I think was supposed to be a growl. "Thank you," I called as he went to the kitchen. The rest of the boys (and their imprints) joined us a while later and we all had our scary movie night marathon.
"I can't believe I'm doing this," Paul said as we painted his spare room green. "This is really happening," he said.
"Yes it is, now keep rolling," I teased while coating the white walls with a baby green color.
"A few more months," I smiled.
"And he's mine," Paul smirked.
"Did you think of a name?" I wondered.
"I have," Letty said coming in the room. I brightened at the sight of her. She was just as stunned and excited as Paul.
"Hey Letty," I said coming to hug her. She kissed my cheek and picked up a paintbrush.
"What about Kyle?" she asked the two of us. Paul made a face and I shrugged, it was okay.
"Mason?" she asked.
"Ehh," I said not really finding it fitting. Paul having a son Mason? What would his nickname be? Mace? I knew Jake would get a nice laugh out of that one. I could hear it now 'Mace? As in the spray?' and then he would crack himself up.
"What about William? Or Matthew?" I asked.
"I like those," Paul said painting the opposite wall. "William Matthew Lahote."
"What about Jeremy?" Letty said. "William Matthew Jeremy Lahote."
"Woah, my kid isn't going to have like 10 names," Paul said. I let out a giggle as she rolled her eyes. "Fine, well you have to decide soon."
He nodded. As we finished painting, Jake, Jared, and Collin came over to help us set up some furniture.
"So how long you got again bro?" Jared wondered.
"A month," Paul said.
"Shoot dude," Jake said.
"Did you pick a name?" Collin wondered. I gave him a smile as Paul rolled his eyes.
"Well its not like we can call the kid squirt for ever," Collin said.
"Or Paul Jr.," Jared laughed.
"…PJ," Jake said cracking up. "Its like PB & J but with no B so its like PJ…" Everyone stared at him weirdly and he rolled his eyes, grumping about how it was a good joke.
"Well, how's it look," I said in charge of decorating the walls. He wanted something there, so I put up some picture frames. I did some of the Pack, Letty, Paul, and even one of Lissa. I wasn't sure if Paul wanted his future son to know about his mom, but the kid did have a right to know.
"It looks perfect," he said smiling at me. "Thank you."
I stared at Paul, knowing it wasn't just a thank you for the décor. It was a thank you for everything. For every step of the way I had been there. Paul had cracked numerous times, telling everyone he couldn't do it. His doubts had been laid out and he was dead set on failure.
It was odd that I could always be the one to get through to him, but I guess it was because he had so much trust in me, just like I felt with Rosalie. Numerous times when I went to see Sam I broke down, and she was always there to help me back up, reassuring me I could do anything.
"Of course," I said with a smile. I helped Collin out with putting a bookshelf together while Jared worked on the crib.
"How the heck does this work?" Jake asked picking up the baby monitor. "Hello? Hello?" he asked in one of them while listening to the other. I laughed as Paul grabbed them and shut them off.
"Idiot," Paul muttered to Jake. Paul had been reading up on every single baby book he could get his hands on. Sometimes he even made me go with him so he didn't look funny buying practically the whole store.
I hung up some of the small baby clothes on the hangers in the closet. It was funny to see such miniature things. Jared making sure the crib was sturdy while Jake set some books in the newly put together bookshelf. Collin was hanging up the mobile while Paul was staring at us all with a smile. Going over to hug him, I glanced at everyone. Team effort.
Giving me a soft squeeze, Paul glanced down at me with a warm smile. He had changed quite a lot. He was no longer out and about with other girls and he was always attentive to Lissa. He had buckled down on his work and made sure to start funds for his kid. I hugged him and laid my head against his side. Paul was a great guy, and I was happy to witness such a change in him. He was like my brother and close friend. "To the diner?" I announced.
"To the diner," Everyone smiled. Paul was the last one to walk out of his son's room, grinning as he shut the door.
The day finally arrived. I was in the bedroom talking to Sam when Edward came in with the phone. It was Paul.
"Bella? Oh my god, I cant do this. She went into labor. And I- oh my god. I think I'm going to pass out. I'm going to be one of those guys on TV. I can't do this. I was a fool to think I could be a dad. And I-"
"Okay, slow down," I said now fully in charge. "Where are you? Forks hospital?"
"Yea," he breathed.
"I'll be right there. Don't go passing out on me now," I said.
Hanging up with him I immediately dialed Carlisle's number.
"Bella?" he asked concerned.
"Hey Carlisle, everything is okay, don't worry. But Paul's girlfriend just went into labor and he is freaking out. I was hoping if you had a chance you could go up to the baby unit and calm him down? I will be there as soon as I can."
"Of course," he said. "I'll see you in the maternity ward," he said smoothly and then hung up.
"Baby time?" Edward asked.
"Yea," I breathed. Glancing at Sam, I kissed his head and smiled. "Show time."
"Want me to drive?" Edward asked. I nodded. Rushing down stairs we alerted everyone.
"Baby time!" I yelled throughout the house. I of course didn't really have to yell since they had the hearing thing but it was natural.
"Really?" Alice said excitedly speeding over to us.
"Yea, lets go," I smiled. The Cullens have actually become really close with the Pack too. They were especially excited when they found out Paul was going to have a kid. Rose was even more happy to hear such a thing. She shared her past with all of us and it really made a difference on how we saw her. Paul wasn't always sure of her, but he took into huge consideration that she helped me out of my funk and put me on track. That, he said, he was forever grateful for. Edward helped me in his car and we all set off to the hospital. I raced into the building, demanding the room number. Alice and Jasper had already called the Pack for me on the way.
"Thanks!" I said to the receptionist as I ran off. When I got up to the maternity ward Paul was pacing in front of a room. I was guessing Lissa was in there.
"What are you doing out here? You should be with your future son!" I scolded.
"I'm supposed to be getting ice chips. Ice chips…" he said repeating himself. I stopped him by the shoulders and made him look at me.
"Ice chips," he said again. Not sure what to do, I lightly smacked him across the face.
"What the hell," he said moving a hand to his face.
"Well it worked," I stated while the vampires behind me chuckled.
"Now, here are your ice chips," I said taking them from Carlisle's hand as I said hello. "Now go back in there and wait for your son to make an appearance."
"Right," he said.
"It's going to be great," I told him. "I promise."
Giving him a hug and a kiss, I shoved him inside and closed the door behind him.
"Did you just smack Paul?" Leah asked coming near us with Cole in tow.
"Yea, I did," I giggled.
It took 4 hours and 56 minutes of waiting till we saw Paul come out with a little bundle of joy in his hands. We were all shocked and in awe at how small the kid looked in his arms. He was perfect.
"Meet William Matthew Lahote. Son, this is everyone," he said with a coo. My eyes teared up and my heart ached to be with Sam. I wished he were here, holding me close. I wished he was marveling the little bundle in his Pack brother's arms with me. I even wished we had a child or had a family of our own.
"Bella, I would like you to meet your godson," Paul smiled.
"Wh-hat?" I asked getting back to the present.
"If you accept, I would like you to be Will's godmother," he said looking up from his son to me.
"Me?" I asked making sure he had the right name,
"You," he laughed. I nodded tears running down my cheeks. He smiled and kissed my head. Handing over his son carefully, I curled my arms around the tiny baby body.
"Hey little man. I'm your godmother and Aunt Bella. I'm going to spoil you rotten, I hope you know," I laughed with tears in my voice.
"Not if I get to him first Bella," Alice cooed with a pep in her voice. Paul chuckled, even accepting them in his son's life.
"How's Lissa?" Carlisle asked.
"Good, glad to be done with labor," he said with a sigh.
"Did she want to see him?" Rose wondered.
"Nope, not even for a second," he said sadly. Rosalie looked angered for a bit, but Emmett just shifted her attention to William.
"He's perfect," I said softly.
"He is," Paul smiled.
A/N: So I went ahead and pretty much finished the story which means more (frequent) updates for my readers! I hope you are enjoying the story so far. I was wondering though what you guys would like to see in the end. Was there something you wanted out of this story? Predict it or request it, just let me know! Also, I know I time skipped quite a bit, which I am sooo sorry for, I just wasn't really sure on how to go about everything. Please review to tell me how I'm doing- it would mean a lot. Thanks!