Important Chapter Notes: This is unlike anything I've attempted in the series as I've avoided using flashbacks in Dancing in Time/Endless Waltz. There are three parts (one this chapter, two next) of this story arc that are written from the perspective of two years ago – dates and times listed next to the segments are important. This also marks one of the original ideas for the series back in 2003. Of course, didn't think it would take me thirty-some odd chapters to get here!

Other notes: The name Wimbly is from the game itself, although it never mentions if he/she was female or male. Playing the game I thought female, but figured I'd use creative license making him a male. Wimbly is short for Wimbledon for my story purposes. If you're going 'who is Wimbly Donner?' they're mentioned on Garden Square when you first log in; he/she is leaving Garden and resigning from their duties of the Garden Festival, which Selphie then takes over…is it sad I know this? At least I'm not alone. ;)

Chapter Ten: Parallax

-o-o-o-

Par-al-lax (-noun.)
An apparent change in the direction of an object,
caused by a change in observational position
that provides a new line of sight.

-o-o-o-

June 9th - 9:47 pm (two years prior – Garden Dorm)

It was new and uncomfortable; it was exciting but also somehow felt inherently wrong. Maybe if he hadn't had that glass (possibly more) of wine or if he had drawn his own boundaries instead of having someone define them for him – Squall Leonhart would not be in this position.

Most sixteen year old males would be thrilled by this prospect, no limitations, no restrictions, and no one to truly stop him – no one except his own conscience. To him, this could be (was) his greatest failure to date.

Then why the hell did failure feel so damn amazing?

He mentally cursed at himself, wishing to find that sense of reason that tonight was obviously lacking. This wasn't him; this was nothing more than something that amounted to teenage rivalry and pride, not to mention both intoxicated and overactive hormones. It all started with an off-handed comment that had gone too far.

Or was in the process of going too far…he wasn't sure which yet…

How he found himself in this position he could barely recall - a position which currently had his arms wrapped around a perfect stranger, hands roaming over barely-covered flesh. His uniform jacket tossed on the floor, shirt unbuttoned, and her hands getting dangerously close to something that he would forever regret. This was not him.

He only met her a few minutes ago. He didn't even recall her last name. It started with a rival. A dare. A dance. An invitation to his dorm. A roommate that was away. A lifetime of feeling pressure, whether real or in his own mind…

How did this all happen?

One word: stupidity. His.

If he was looking for a sign to stop, his mind was screaming plenty, but the swirling mixture of alcohol, hormones, and tension seemed to have the upper hand over logic and reason. Again, this wasn't him, but maybe for just tonight, for just this moment in life, he wanted it to be. The following moments would only be a short term answer, however, the regret he would feel later would be overwhelming – but he didn't seem to give a damn.

This was different. The feeling of someone's lips upon his was foreign. It was so easy for some people – physical contact and relationships were so causal. Why for tonight couldn't he just let himself go? Nothing was stopping him.

That was nothing until the door suddenly opened.

So much for his damned roommate that was supposed to be away.

Squall was angry and outright furious as he cursed, again not acting himself. He rarely showed emotion, but that man wasn't supposed to be there. Squall was embarrassed and ashamed that he had allowed his actions to get this far. Instead of yelling at himself, he angrily growled at his roommate who stood in utter shock – and this scene was a shock to Wimbly to say the very least. But Squall's tirade was never directed toward the right person, he hated his weakness at that moment.

Deep inside Squall was thankful.

He just couldn't see that right now; he had wanted a sign earlier and thankfully, he found one.

July 14th 10:13am

Rinoa felt a certain unease sitting on the edge of Squall's bed. She had been patiently waiting while he went ahead and contacted the headmaster. Right now, she couldn't shake the feeling that she had made a mistake in even coming down here. There was an underlying feeling of tension surrounding them; it was something that she eventually had sensed once she could see beyond her own issues.

Sometimes their empathetic connection could be both a blessing and a curse – it always served a purpose, it just never seemed to be convenient. Of course, that would have been too easy, and since when was their relationship anything close to easy?

Going to Squall wasn't her intent when she left her desk, but then again, she wasn't sure what her intent had been when she took the break. Still, one step had led to another and then another until she had found herself perched on his doorstep. Part of her wondered how he would take this. She didn't want to appear weak, like she would have to run to him every time something upset her. There seemed to be a fine balance that she was still trying to define. Time would only tell if this had been the correct decision. Honestly, it was too late to have a change of heart now.

She may have been overacting just a tad to her father's invitation, but things tended to rub her the wrong way when it came to Caraway. Rinoa just didn't know why she had been invited to the inauguration ball – was it because he truly wanted her there, as a start to a renewed relationship with Timber, or because she was part of the six who saved the world?

Sure, if it had been either of the first two options she would have been more than flattered, but she was highly skeptical. She guessed it had to do with her new found celebrity. She certainly wasn't going to let that man exploit her when, in fact, he was the one vehemently opposed to her involvement in the first place.

She had to let that line of thinking go for now, as apparently she had other things to worry about. The worst part about this morning's little scenario - Squall wanted to talk…wanted to. That was near the equivalent of her wanting to touch a spider or wanting to jump off a bridge; neither of those things were high up on her 'to do' list.

As she waited her fingers nervously fumbled around with his bedspread, un-tucking the corners from their military-grade confines. She wondered how his conversation with Cid was going; she had opted out of staying in the room when he called the headmaster. It wasn't exactly standard protocol for two workers to take time off in the morning to talk about personal issues. She pretty much knew in the real world this would most likely get them both fired, yet here, they had always been granted leeway. Then again, there was nothing 'real-world' about their situation in the first place.

It really hadn't been that long, it just seemed like it was taking him forever. Her nerves were starting to get the better of her. She paused when she had a random thought - what if he could sense that she was nervous? By default would that make him nervous when talking to the headmaster? That could be really awkward for both of them. She swallowed, trying to calm herself. This line of thinking would get her nowhere and in the end, make the situation far more complicated than it need be.

Luckily, she didn't have time to dissect things further as Squall finally walked in from the other room. She couldn't tell much by his expression, or lack thereof of one, but knowing Squall was still an art form that she most likely would never completely master.

"How'd it go?" she asked trying not show her nervousness.

"Fine. He understands."

She crooked her neck to the side, contemplating the possible meaning of his answer. "Do you ever think it's a little on the strange side that Cid understands so much about us?"

He shrugged, though he gave her the tiniest hint of a smile – the one that only his friends could possibly decipher.

"Just as strange as the fact that I'm an eighteen year old commander, a knight, and my girlfriend is a sorceress. Not to mention that he basically lead a parallel life for awhile – give or take a few major details. He just doesn't want that to happen to us."

He sat on the edge of his bed nudging her over to the other side. She silently obliged and both found a way to rearrange themselves so they were relatively comfortable. He never realized how small a twin bed could be until the rare times that fate tossed them on one. Then again, sometimes he didn't mind the closeness at all. It was also this rare closeness that would often give him strength to look at their future.

"But Rinoa, I'm not blind. I know there's more than one reason for his willingness to work around us. I mean, sure, he cares and I know that – I'm not doubting that for a second. But there's also the fact that we're less of a threat to Garden if they can keep an eye on us. It's not a completely selfless act on their part."

He let it go at that. If that situation would have to be addressed at a later time, he would, but for now all parties seemed content on their arrangements. They both had maneuvered themselves so they were leaning against the headboard. There was a moment that part of him felt the need to instinctively wrap his arm around her. However, given the conversation that was most likely going to transpire, he didn't know how appropriate that action would be.

"So," he began looking directly in her eyes, "you want to start? Why don't you tell me what's in your purse that has you so upset?"

She nodded silently.

Instead of telling him, she figured it would be just as easy to show him the invitation. Unfortunately, she had set her bag on his nightstand earlier. Of course, when he scooted her over she was no longer next to her purse. So, she reached over him to retrieve the envelope. It wasn't exactly a bad thing to be that close as she pressed against his body. Actually, it was just the opposite. This hadn't been her original intent, but it would be rather redundant to pull back now; she still wanted her bag and this was so much better than walking around the bed. She heard him make a sound akin to moan; apparently, she was crushing him more than she thought.

Sitting back up right, she smiled innocently, "Sorry about that."

He didn't reply just lifted an accusatory eyebrow in her direction; he knew she wasn't as innocent as she was trying to play. He shook his head feigning disgust and took the envelope now in her hand. He knew she truly wasn't sorry, but then again, he wasn't truly upset.

They remained in silence as he read the invitation. He hadn't really understood the true reason for her mood until he saw the small hand-written note: your attendance is required.

He nodded in agreement. "Yeah, that's a little harsh."

"I just-" she began, once again frustrated by the situation, "why does he still think that after all this time he can still order me around? It's not like I'm some kind of soldier in his private little army."

"Rinoa, I'm in no way siding with him, but I just want to say that maybe this is the only way he knows. Asking for things isn't always easy for some people, especially if either giving or receiving orders is the norm in their life."

"I suppose," she mumbled, though not completely sold. "It just seems that with him it's different. I've seen both sides. Yes, he can have that military persona, but he also used to have a…well, civilian side - for lack of a better term. It was there when I was younger, before my mother… well, you know. It's just that I want to see that side of him again not this side." She pointed to the order written on the invitation.

This was hitting close to home for Squall. If anyone walked in, they might think they were talking about him - not Caraway. But truthfully, it would be hard for Rinoa to understand how trained one becomes, how even in everyday live that strict mindset was hard to brush off.

He only hoped that she wouldn't take his comments the wrong way. He wasn't defending Caraway, rather trying to offer another perspective. "I understand your point too, but the fact is you may have to get through the military part of him to find the other one again."

Rinoa contemplated his words and maybe to some degree Squall did make sense. She just didn't know how much more regimented bullshit she could handle from Caraway before it became too much. She was already at a point where every little thing that the man did irritated her. Maybe having a boyfriend who was also in the military could offer her different insights. Honestly, Rinoa could see both sides of Squall, both a warrior and a boyfriend. Maybe she should give her father the same opportunity.

She took the invitation back from Squall, carefully rereading the words. It didn't seem to lessen her irritation, but maybe there was some hope behind the pretense. "So, you think we should go?"

He was just about to answer that the choice was hers, but then the date sunk in. "Rin, I honestly can't tell you what you should do, but unfortunately, I wouldn't be able to go with you. SeeD has a yearly retreat for senior leaders and instructors that has already been pushed back. I have a two-week commitment the middle of August. It's really nothing I can get out of."

"Oh," she answered, unsure if she was disappointed by this or thankful she now had another reason to decline. She thought about it for a minute before admitting, "I wasn't ready to face him anyhow. It's not like this is earth-shattering if I don't go and I'm certainly not facing that firing squad alone."

"Thanks for wanting to toss me in front of the squad too," he half-joked. "I'll remember that when I have to face Laguna." Then he paused realizing how absurd that comment was, "Yeah, that doesn't exactly work, does it? You love the guy. Somehow, I get to lose out twice on this facing our father issues. I'll just make you jump off another bridge, then maybe we'll be even."

"Always the chivalrous one, aren't you?" She laughed, playfully tapping him on the arm.

"Kind of in my job description – that whole knight thing. But honestly, I'm really sorry I couldn't be more help about this."

"No, please don't ever think that. You were helpful… but mostly, I think I just needed to vent. So, thank you." Rinoa tried to assure. Now it was her time to repay the favor, or at least she hoped. "All right, now that you've helped me out of my semi-off-the-wall crisis, it's my turn to do the same… You want to talk about whatever's on your mind?"

"No," he stated rather bluntly at first, but then corrected himself, "I mean yes, I do. It's just that I'd rather not, but I feel that it's time… I guess my timing skills are just as spot-on as yours, huh?"

"You're not making much sense," Rinoa said slowly, not sure if she had seen him quite this at a loss for words.

"I'm aware." Squall placed his head into his hands and rubbed his eyes for a second. He really wasn't sure how to bring this up or even why he decided to pick now. He was never really known for his keen sense of timing, but then again neither was Rinoa – it was another common trait they had inadvertently discovered they shared.

He finally looked up, quickly glancing over to her before returning his gaze in front of him. Now or never…

"Well, ironically, I got an invitation in the mail today too."

"What? Caraway sent you one? I guess that makes sense given your position and all but..."

"No, no… I didn't mean from him. I mean a wedding invitation from my old roommate."

"…And this is bad how?"

She honestly had no idea why this would upset him to a point of being near incoherent. Maybe Squall was much more opposed to the idea of marriage than she thought… or was it possible that he had an allergic reaction to the paper the invitation was printed on? Sadly, given the choice between those two thoughts, she honestly hoped it was the latter.

"We kind of have a history." He finally said after a long, awkward pause.

"He was your roommate, isn't that sorta expected?"

"To a point, yes, except I ignored him for over three years and then one night pretty much ended up losing my temper with him. I blamed him for certain things when honestly, he did nothing wrong."

"I'm missing something here, aren't I?"

"Yes and no." There he was giving indecisive answers again. At this rate, they would be sitting here until dinner time. Once more in frustration, he put his hands to his face. Why was this so difficult to talk about?

She didn't push him or even encourage him to continue. She knew that sometimes it was best to just back off and let him work things out in his own mind. He would tell her when he was ready, if he was really ready. The fact that he had even come this far spoke volumes. His heart really wanted to tell her, even if his brain hadn't figured that out yet.

"Rinoa the thing is you know, or I should say, saw most of it… I just never explained. Maybe I should have after you remembered what Ultimecia showed you, but I don't think I was ready then."

"Oh," she said softly.

Rinoa immediately knew what he was talking about and although she had been curious for months, she always respected his privacy enough not to ask. She wasn't exactly meant to see that part of his life, though it sometimes bothered her more than she cared to admit at times, but they were both allowed their pasts.

She had her history with Seifer and that couldn't have ever been easy on Squall, especially knowing the lifetime of harassment those two shared. Then again, Squall was never forced to witness those events firsthand, and that was most likely a godsend.

Still, the images with Squall and that other girl, dancing and kissing… well, they were hard to push out of her mind. It wasn't right and rather hypocritical, but it seemed to be just part of human nature, she supposed.

"So, what you saw...it happened. I wish it didn't, but it did."

He stopped half expecting her to offer a response. She didn't. Whether this was a good sign or bad one only time would tell. The main problem to him was even with all that happened, he had no idea what Rinoa had seen or heard. He had no idea how Ultimecia had twisted it or if she could have twisted the truth any worse than it already was in his mind…

It was all a little unnerving. For a second, he recalled when he had heard Laguna's thoughts. He was so annoyed at the time that he never realized how intrusive it truly was. Not to mention that he would never want to discuss what he'd witnessed through the eyes of Laguna; it was horrible enough for him to experience once. His father's thoughts on Julia were now rather disturbing, in his opinion, knowing how that little story played out.

The commander would have to sort out those feelings later, as right now, he realized that he was purposely avoiding the subject at hand. Yet, Rinoa had said nothing through his silence, which he was extremely thankful for, especially after the errant thoughts of their parents.

"Yeah…" he mumbled, taking a deep breath.

Rinoa would never know why, but the curiosity was quickly getting the better of her. He was having trouble - that was quite obvious. It was a gamble, but maybe she could move him along.

"Who… who was she?" After the words left her mouth, she was mortified at her own bluntness.

"Nobody." He responded knowing that wasn't exactly the truth either. She was just 'nobody' to him.

"Squall, she wasn't nobody."

"No, I suppose she wasn't. But she was nobody to me, just a mistake I almost made."

"Almost?" Somehow she already knew that, but confirmation never hurt.

"Yes, almost… Rinoa, just because I have kissed another girl, doesn't mean that you weren't the first person I kissed."

"Sometimes I don't know if you're being really sweet and compassionate or just really obtuse."

"Obtuse? Me? I'd like to categorize myself more as acute."

The next thing Squall heard was her laughter radiating from beside him.

And just like that, somehow the tension had been broken. They were still talking about something neither of them really wanted to but, in that second, he knew it was going to be okay. Nothing would change, not that he really expected it to. They were continually in the process of learning about each other, learning to defuse the otherwise tense times. And sometimes, an unexpected comment from him was all it took to break that barrier.

The thing that still amazed him was that it was almost becoming second nature. Rinoa had managed to get through his military side and get into that other part he just recently found existed. Even though the tension had been broken, that didn't negate his obligations to explain the truth.

With one sideways glance at her, he followed through with his initial instincts.

"Come here," he softly said, pulling her forward enough to move his arm around her. She easily obliged and found solace close to him. Being like this, she honestly believed what he had just told her - that she really was the first person he had ever kissed. It was an extremely sweet sentiment that she would never forget.

"I'm guessing you know certain parts about the truth, seen some parts. Honestly, probably more than I even remember, it's kind of a blur. I think I remember yelling at Wimbly more than anything."

"So, Mr. Obtuse, you never did tell me who she was…are you really going to make me guess?"

"If I tell you I really don't know much about her or who she was – would that make it seem worse or better?"

"Well, knowing you, that only makes it more confusing."

"Then I really shouldn't tell you that Seifer's involved."

Rinoa opened her mouth as if to make a comment, but immediately closed it. Sometimes when the word 'Seifer' was involved… silence was golden.

"Yeah, I thought you'd say something like that," Squall replied dryly after he had seen her mouth start to move. "It's really not that complicated and certainly nothing I'm proud to admit, but I think it would be best for me start at the beginning."