The Talk of the Town
New York – Central Park
Glen Simmons dreamed of working for one of the great daily newspapers in the city all of his life. In a way he'd achieved that dream, well almost. Glen was a stringer for the Daily News and several of the magazines based in and around the city. That meant he was freelance, which basically meant he didn't actually work for any of them, just sold them pictures he took and they wanted. Another name for stringer is independent contractor. It's a nice title, but what it really means is they don't have to give him benefits or pay taxes on him because he officially doesn't work for them.
Think Uber and you'll get what he does. He's part of the Gig Economy. In this Gig Economy, businesses save resources in terms of benefits, office space and training. It's the opposite of a "real job", you know permanent, well paid and with benefits. Gig makes it sound kind of hip and cool, like you're a beatnik or base player in a jazz trio, but calling a job a gig is a luxury reserved for people who can pretend they don't need one. If you think of the people cobbling together a livelihood cleaning apartments, working fast food, delivering groceries and doing other people's laundry, not many of those people think of themselves as having gigs.
Glen wasn't in a jazz trio, he had studied photography in college but with the collapse of the traditional newspaper-advertising model and the emergence of the Internet many stringers are becoming superstringers. This meant they didn't eventually get full time jobs at the papers and were forced to work other part time jobs to make a living and pay their bills. Glen was one of these people that had to work more then one job. So as the snow continued to come down, he was obliged to walk back to his apartment from another 'gig' to save the money a ride would cost. He had his camera with him and was taking shots of the city in the snowstorm. Glen figured he could capture a few human-interest type shots that the papers always liked to use. You know the ones, a guy skiing down one of the main street or kids with trash bags as sleds in the park.
He was cutting through Central Park towards his apartment when he saw them in the distance. Glen reached for his camera instinctively. It was a young couple all by themselves in the park in the middle of the snowstorm. They were at least five hundred yards away from him, but in the moonlight he could see they were dancing. As he raised his camera to snap a few shots, Glen couldn't help thinking they seemed a million miles away from everything around them. They were in a world of their own where only each other mattered. He watched as the young man dipped the young woman and then kissed her. He couldn't make out their faces, but the picture was going to sell he just knew.
They started to walk away, hand in hand and Glen snapped one last shot. He changed directions as they disappeared into the snowstorm. He needed to get these photos to the city editor of the Post tonight for tomorrow's edition. One of his 'gigs' was going to pay off for him tonight.
The Watchtower – The Next Day
Even heroes eventually have downtime. In some ways it's in those moments that they are most like the rest of us. It's when relationships are cemented over a cup of coffee, stories are told and coworkers become friends. Sitting at a table were the usual suspects, Wally, Zatanna, Dinah, Shayera and Mari. They were catching up, doing a little gossiping, telling jokes and just doing what most coworkers do when they have some downtime.
"So I saw the worst, bar none, toy online the other night,' Wally ventured. "It's pure nightmare fuel."
"Why are you looking for toys online at night?' Dinah asked.
"Toys? Really?" Shayera said.
"Don't guys usually look at porn?" Zatanna added. "That's sort of what the Internet was invented for, wasn't it?"
"I don't know about invented,' Wally replied. "I mean, sure I imagine it was one of the factors. I imagine blowing stuff up or spying on people was the first thought. Okay, porn was a close second but I'm pretty sure killing people and snooping were probably first."
"Yeah, that makes sense,' Zatanna added.
"Your serious? You look up toys online?' Shayera asked. "How old are you again?"
"I drift sometimes, okay?" Wally stated in his defense. "Didn't you ever start looking at one thing and then you start following links and end up totally someplace else you weren't expecting."
"Yeah, but that usually leads you to porn,' Mari suggested. "I'm pretty sure all links and roads lead to porn eventually, not the opposite like you're suggesting."
"Look, I'm trying to tell you all a nice, family friendly story about this creepy toy and you're ruining it with all your talk about porn!" Wally said in exasperation.
"I don't believe that combination of words have ever come out of a guy's mouth before,' Dinah remarked.
"How exactly are we ruining it?' Zee asked.
"Well, you know, cause,' Wally fumbled to say.
"Cause what?"
"Cause now I'm thinking about porn!" Wally admitted.
"Weren't you sort of thinking about that already?" Zee asked. "I mean you're a guy."
"Well, yeah, but in the background,' Wally said. "Besides you're ruining my creepy toy story with your smutty porn talk!"
"Another phrase I don't think a man has every said to a table full of women,' Dinah observed.
"Do you really want him to talk about porn?" Shayera asked.
The four women looked at each other for a moment.
"Okay, so creepy toy story it is, let's hear it Wally,' Zee said breaking the silence.
"I'm not sure I want to tell you it now,' Wally said, crossing his arms in a huff.
"Oh, come on, you know you're dying to tell us,' Shayera replied. "Just get on with it."
"Well, if you insist!" Wally said with a big smile. He pulled out his phone and quickly brought up a picture.
"The toy is called Tooth Monster Doll." He continued. "According to the ad it says you just take your little one's baby teeth and sew or glue them into the monster doll's mouth. Now your child can cuddle with a plush toy made from his or her own discarded body parts! FUN!"
"That's not real,' Diana instantly said.
"Oh My God!" Zee gasped as she looked at the picture on Wally's phone. "They're called Fugglers!"
She handed the phone to Shayera with a look of horror on her face.
"It can't be that bad,' Shayera dismissively said. "AAAHHHH! I was wrong! What is that nightmare?"
She quickly passed the phone to Mari, who recoiled in horror before passing it to Dinah.
"My God the kid is going to need therapy if you give them one of those!" Dinah gasped.
"I think I might need therapy too,' Mari groaned. "I can't un-see that!"
Dinah tossed the phone towards Wally as if it were on fire.
"Sew or glue your baby's own first teeth into the doll, why would anyone want to cuddle with that?' Mari asked. "You might as well start saving for the child's therapy instead of college right then and there. What happened to putting them under your pillow for the Tooth Fairy?"
"I keep picturing a little kid snuggling with a doll that has his teeth in it,' Dinah said in disgust.
"Could we stop talking about it?" Zatanna said in exasperation. "I'm going to be sick, change the subject, please? Anything, just not that!"
There was a silence as the horror of the doll seemed to linger over all of them, well except one.
"So that's all I had on the doll, if you want to go back to talking about porn, I'm down with it,' Wally offered with a smile.
Shayera of course slapped him for it.
"Pick something else,' she said to him.
"Something without baby teeth,' Zee added, a shudder going down her body at the thought.
"Kind of stuck thinking about porn now,' Wally admitted. "It's you guys fault."
Shayera was going to hit him again, but he sort of had a point, they did bring up porn.
Diana walked into the cafeteria as they all were desperately trying to think of something else besides the creepy doll. While she rarely participated, Diana did like to listen to the latest gossip once and awhile. Grabbing a cup of coffee she started to stroll over towards the table to see what they were talking about.
The specter of the creepy doll had everyone sort of in limbo for something to say, something different to say, that is. Mari took the initiative and reached over to one of the other tables and picked up the day's Daily News. She held up the front page, which had the pictures Glen took of the couple dancing in the park the previous night.
"How about this?" Mari said. "Romance in the middle of a snowstorm."
"If the choice is a guy and a girl freezing to death in a snowstorm or porn, I'd still vote for porn,' Wally offered.
This time Shayera did hit him.
"Ow! So one vote against,' he said, glancing at Shayera then turning his attention to the others. "So anyone else up for some porn talk?"
The looks the others gave him relayed their opinion on the subject.
"Okay, so ix-nay on the porn talk, got it,' Wally replied and then shifted gears. "What's so special about a guy and a girl in a snowstorm, though?
"It's romantic,' Zatanna said. "Dancing in the moonlight as the snow falls all around them, alone in the park like that it's magical."
"Alone at night in a park doesn't sound romantic, it sounds like the beginning of a police report." Wally ventured. "Oh and by the way, just because you're a magician doesn't mean you have to say everything is magical, Zee. You're allowed to use other adjectives I'm pretty sure."
"Douchebag!" Zee snarled.
"I think that's more of a noun, but good try," Wally replied with a smile.
Zatanna was about to hit him, but Wally held up his hand.
"Please don't hit me,' Wally asked.
Zatanna seemed to consider it for a moment.
"Okay, this time,' she finally said and turned back to the discussion. "I still think it's … um, well, special. How's that?"
"Ah, well, special can have a couple of meanings, not all great if you know what I mean."
"I think you're special, Wally and I only mean that in one way,' She said with a smile.
"Thanks!"
"You're an imbecile,' Shayera grumbled and then hit him for good measure.
"I think I like being special better,' Wally replied, rubbing his shoulder.
Diana had stopped when she saw them looking at the front of the paper. She'd seen it before and thankfully it didn't show their faces, but she was afraid someone would figure out that it was Kal in the picture dancing with her. She'd promised him she would keep it a secret and now that they were going out she sort of wanted to keep it a secret for her own reasons. She wasn't ashamed of dating and taking dance lessons with Kal, she just liked that they had this one thing all to themselves. Sooner or later someone would find out, Diana just didn't want it to be right now. She took a seat several tables away from the group but she could still hear them clearly. As she listened she hoped they would get back off track and on to something else like they usually did.
"I think it does look romantic,' Dinah ventured, returning them to the topic. "They obviously like each other and dancing is kind of magical. Oh, and I can use that word Wally, I'm not a magician."
"Point taken,' Wally replied. "It was freezing last night remember? Sure, dancing's great, but indoors with heat that is all I'm saying."
"It was really cold last night,' Shayera admitted.
"You two should date, neither one of you has any romance in your soul,' Zee complained.
"Hey!" Shayera protested, pointing her finger at Zee. "Just because I don't want to freeze to death doesn't mean I don't have any romance in me! Take that back!"
"Okay, sorry,' Zee replied, raising her hands in surrender. "You're a Thanagarian Valentine's Day card come to life, happy?"
"We don't have Valentine's Day on Thanagar,' Shayera admitted. "We have something similar but it involves feats of strength. It's quite the holiday back home."
"Yeah, that really sounds magical,' Zee sarcastically replied. This earned her a glare from Shayera.
"Wally slap Zatanna,' Dinah said.
He immediately did.
"Ow! What was that for?" Zee complained to Dinah.
"Too much snark,' Dinah replied.
"You just do what she tells you to do now?" Zee turned and complained to Wally.
"Well, yeah, if it involves someone getting hit other than me, sure,' he offered. "Besides, she's mean when she wants to be."
"How do you know I'm not going to be mean now?" Zee asked him.
"Really didn't think it out that far,' Wally admitted.
"Ya think?" Zee replied and then slapped him.
"Ow, okay, I'll give you that one, but you have to admit Dinah's meaner and scarier than you are, Zee,' he offered. "When she gets that vein popping out and pulsing in her forehead it's like she's going to kill someone or have a stroke."
"Hey!" Dinah protested. Before she could shout at Wally, Shayera interrupted her.
"So are you saying you think Dinah's the scariest of the four of us, Wally?" Shayera said. "Scarier than me?"
'Or me?" Mari chimed in.
"Um-um well, ah, how should I put this,' Wally stammered to say. He was thinking this would be a good time to run but they wouldn't forget this and he'd have to either keep dodging them or quit the League. "I-I think, well, you're all scary."
"But who's the scariest Wally?" Dinah asked, before Shayera could.
Damn it, Wally thought, there's always another question with Dinah. She can't just let it go. Should have probably said that was part of why she was scarier than Zee, but now that I think about it that probably wouldn't have helped.
"We're waiting, Wally!" Shayera demanded. "Who's the scariest?"
Casting his eyes around for any salvation they landed on Diana. Bingo, my get out of jail free card.
"Diana's the scariest,' he confidently said.
"What? Why?' Both Shayera and Dinah asked. Mari seemed rather interested in the answer too.
"Cause you actually have to mean to hurt me, Diana can do it just by accident,' Wally offered. "She doesn't have to turn into a tiger or grab her mace or even scream, all she has to do slip for a second. Plus she can run and fly a lot faster than you all."
The others considered what he said for a moment.
"He kind of has a point,' Mari admitted. "She also has that Amazon thing going for her."
"That's what scares me a little about her," Zee whispered. "I mean I like Diana a lot and kind of admire her, but that whole island full of Xena warrior women types is kind of intimidating and scary."
"I'm a warrior, does that mean I scare you too?' Shayera asked with a smile.
"No, not really,' Zee replied.
"Hey!" Shayera protested.
Diana was just starting to relax as they once again seemed to be off on another tangent, but of course Wally had to ruin it.
"Hey you know Diana could dance out in the snow like that picture,' he said. "I mean the cold wouldn't bother her the way it does everyone else."
"But the person she was dancing with would have to not feel the cold too or she'd just be dancing with a guy freezing to death,' Mari pointed out.
"I could think of worse ways to go,' Wally commented. Shayera was just about to slap him, but he continued talking. "You know, Big Blue could dance with Diana in the snowstorm, he doesn't feel the cold either."
Shayera didn't hit him, as she thought about it. Diana held her breath waiting to hear what the others would say.
"No, that wouldn't work,' Zee replied. "Clark doesn't dance. I asked him and I think Dinah did too at Bruce's party last year. He was nice about it, but declined."
"If he didn't dance with one of us, he probably doesn't know how to dance if you think about it," Dinah added. "I mean what other explanation is there?"
"Yeah, that sounds about right,' Zee said in agreement.
Shayera and Mari had been looking at the two as they said this.
"Wait a second, so if he didn't dance with either of you that automatically means he must not know how to dance?" Mari asked. "Maybe he just didn't want to dance with you or didn't like the song?"
Dinah and Zee seemed to think about it for a moment.
"Na, that doesn't sound right,' Zee replied.
"Exactly,' Dinah agreed. "It's because he doesn't know how to dance, that has to be the reason."
Wally leaned over towards Shayera and whispered.
"I guess we don't have to ask who has the biggest ego do we?" He said with a smirk and then rolled his eyes towards Dinah and Zee. Shayera leaned a little closer to him.
"I'd agree with you, but they look like they want to hit somebody,' she whispered in replied.
Wally looked at Zee and Dinah and they were not happy.
"Yeah, that scary vein is popping out of Dinah's forehead,' he groaned.
As the sound of Zee and Dinah slapping Wally reached Diana's ears she started to relax again. Dodged a bullet on that one, she thought.