Alright, I'm going to be brutally honest and say that I wasn't even sure that there was going to be an update today. June is just brutal, and has far too much shit to do. But I pushed through to get this here, so here it stays.

I know that I haven't done this in a while, but I'm going to have to skip next week and update two Thursdays from now. Sorry, but I need a bit of a rest.

But, huh? Can you guys and gals believe that this is the last chapter, because it is. And I think it's my longest chapter for this story. :)

So without further ado, Enjoy.

Disclaimer: Still don't own anything. I'm just having a blast at making up what I like.

Warning: Same as the first chapter.

Chapter 5: People, Pictures, and Purple Puppies

As much as I would love to detail each and every word that I said, it's not really important. I just told Oaken and Punz what happened. I pretty much started after when I had left from Tiana's workplace, since Oaken could vouch for me on that and worked my way to the present.

I'm glad that I had the water bottle close by, because even my shortened version of what happened was pretty long.

But after all was said and done, I was nervous. Honestly, in that freezer of an apartment, I had sweat on my eyebrows. I've gotten into some stupid situations because of the jackasses that I call my friends. But this…

I really fucked up. I really did.

No matter what way I looked at it, I just straight-up fucked up big time. There's no detention or Saturday School for this. It's going to be criminal fucking charges that will stay with me until my dying day. I swear to God, I could almost feel my hair turning white from the stress I felt.

But I'm telling you now: Today, my faith in Karma has been restored.

Why? 'Cause Karma made Rapunzel the most chillest/weirdest person on Earth. And before you all say anything, don't go all grammar Nazi on me.

Through my whole confession of my oh-so horrible sins, she never yelled or interrupted me. And at the end of it, she hugged me. And I mean full-on, with two surprisingly muscular arms, bear hug. It wasn't as weird as it was unexpected. I like a hug as much as the person right next to me, (a.k.a. Oaken) but I only had one thing on my mind as she hugged me.

Why in hell is she hugging the person that broke into her friend's place?

I basically said the same thing to her face, so I got my answer.

First, she corrected in by saying that the apartment was actually hers and Elsa's. They're roommates and had been friends since forever. It's easy that they're friends since they're family. Cousins actually. They even graduated together from the same college.

And I now know why I recognize her. The graduation picture that I saw earlier had the younger versions of Punz and Elsa.

Besides that, she told me that this was the best way that the whole shit-fest could have gone. She said it better, but you get what I mean. She basically compared me to dear Mother Teresa and couldn't stop thanking me for looking after her best friend and her best friend's puppy. Like I said, Karma made Punz into the weirdest and calmest person I know.

The only part that she really got mad was about how easy the door broke. Pinocchio backed it up with his report on all of the aging and rot the door and the door frame had. She basically told us that she would break down the doors of the apartment complex's office building with a frying pan. That way they would really need to really fix the doors.

It was a good thing that Oaken and I talked her out of that plan, but she's still weird. Kinda like a kid's mind in the body of a hot brunette.

So, all of this drama tied up a lot easier than I would have imagined. I psyched myself out for nothing.

But I remembered something very important: None of this would have happened if Elsa wasn't so bat-shit sick. There's sickness and there was Elsa's sickness. When I asked Punz and Oaken, I mostly thought that maybe she had a shitty immune system. But they explained it better and told me a bunch of other stuff.

Apparently, Elsa is Norwegian while Punz is half-German, half-Norwegian. They were cousins, but Elsa's side of the family lived in Norway while Rapunzel's side lived in Germany. The family was one of those close-knit kinds, so they visited each other a lot. When they were younger, summer was the only season that they could meet up without school getting in the way. Later, Punz wanted to stay in Norway and with her cousin so badly that she convinced her parents to allow her to move in with her uncle. Punz and Elsa grew up and moved out of Norway and immigrated to the U.S. about a year ago. Punz became a painter and Elsa became the professor at my university.

Honestly, I think Punz rambles more than I do. And that's saying something.

Anyway, the thing that happened was that sicknesses are different in different places. Shocking, I know. But that explains why traveling gets so expensive, because if you don't get vaccinated, some of those diseases can and will kill.

As fucked up as that sounds, it's alright in this situation. Punz had caught the cold from some careless ass and she was as loopy and shit-crazy as Elsa was now. Even Oaken jumped in and told his little backstory of his horrible first cold when he first moved over. Besides that, when Punz got better, she passed it onto Elsa and the whole story comes together.

Yep. It was a longer conversation than I ever wanted to listen through, but I did. And I was tense as hell though the entire thing. Maybe I was still waiting for the axe to drop on my neck. Because I couldn't be getting away this easily, right? I mean…right?

Damn, I think I used up all my good fortune for the next year. Thanks, Elsa.

Oh, and before I forget, Ms. Vinters's first name is Elsa. That's what Punz keeps calling her, so I will, too. Also, because I really like it. The name 'Elsa Vinters' has a nice ring to it.

But I'm probably not making sense. Too much drama in a day does fuck up a brain. Right now, the drama is just ever so slowly leaving my system, but I was still absorbing what's happening around me. But before the fact that I'm getting off scotch-free could really set in, my thoughts were pulled away by another set of voices.

I was still on the floor as Elsa's pillow, so I couldn't really see who had come, but it didn't take me long to recognize my not-so-mysteriously-murdered friend and his little brother. Pinocchio was being the little helper that he was until Kristoff tapped him on the back. Still, he greeted the two with a smile and pointed them to our little gathering.

"Well, I'm fashionably late as always!"

I face palmed, hard.

And that's why Kristoff is a complete goober. He's a sloppy, rude, and idiotic goober.

And I wouldn't change that for the world.

…If any of you dare tell him that, I'll just deny it.

Anyway, I could ignore his horrible intro line this one time as I caught sight of a large liter of Sprite and the grocery bag in Sven's arms and the smell of my delicious supreme pizza drifted through the air.

Three cheers. The cavalry's arrived fashionably late.

"Alright Bjorgman. Stop parading around my food before you lose a hand." Seriously, I ate nothing but water today, so he should be afraid. Very afraid.

Good thing that he's not brain dead, or he really would have lost a hand. Anyway, he falls on his knees like a knight in shining armor to present the cheesy heaven that is pizza. He speaks in a solemn and mature voice, sounding years older than he really was.

"My dear Princess, I have traveled across the lands for the Sacred Manna of Heaven and the Holy Drink of Immunity. I have succeeded in my quest and present them as tributes of my undying loyalty."

Dead fricking silence.

And then, I can't. I just can't.

I bust out laughing at the idiot. I'm laughing so hard that I'm crying. I can't see and my lungs are burning and I can't stop. I got to hold myself to not shake too much and wake up Elsa, but…

"Hmm…"

Too late.

Her head was on my lap and with my laughing, I shook the poor white-blonde awake. I'm doing my best to control the last of my giggles when she opens her eyes to look at me. It's still the hazy blue of her cold, but at least she's seems okay. I quickly move the cold-watered paper towel off of her forehead before I start talking to her.

Well… First, I glare at the dipshit for making me laugh.

You prancing thespian. Can't you be serious for one afternoon, instead of your multiple personality shittery that you do?

And then I calmly talk to Elsa.

"Hey, Elsa. How do you feel?" Without really thinking about it, I start running my fingers though her hair again. I like playing with her long, blonde hair and I think she does too as she leans closer to my hand like a kitten would.

Warning: Cuteness Level High.

"I'm… hungry."

Oh, wow. Any food that she'll eat will most likely come back up, and no offense, but I'm not cleaning puke. That's where I put my foot down. I look at my phone and check to see if I could maybe slip in some more medicine to her. But nah, it's only been two hours. So, I turn to Oaken and repeat what she told me to him.

"Ya, I'll go an' fex soom up fer Elsa." Oaken replies with his usual jolly voice.

My eyes follow Oaken as he moves from the love seat and into the kitchen. Remember that huge pot that he brought in? Well, it has the Oaken's secret family recipe for sodd. Basically, it's stew with mutton and meatballs. Oaken ate it when he was sick, he made it for Rapunzel when she was sick, and now he made it again for Elsa. I don't know about you, but I feel like a tradition is being made.

Anyway, the smells of the cuisines of the Italians mix in with the Norwegians so well that it makes my stomach gurgle. Oh, well. I gotta feed this, so…

"Hey, Sven? Can you please give me a cup of Sprite? The cups are in the cabinet to the far right." Aww, and there he goes. Sven is really such a sweet little guy that I could almost forget who he's related to, because those two couldn't be further different.

But they love each other, and I love the two brothers. I just show it differently for each. Why do you think I was so pissed off at the idiot for speeding?

The little gentleman gives me some liquid goodness, while his clumsy knight of a brother gives me a slice of cheese heaven on a paper towel. I'm about to swallow the slice whole, when I see Sven shifting on his feet. It's not much, but I know him better. He's nervous about something.

When I look where he's looking, all I see is Kristoff being a doof with Punz. But I can also see a specific white fluff trying to sneak a nip at the thespian knight's hard-earned meal. Sven loves animals, but that particular animal is in the lap of a stranger. Sven is quiet around new people, while the bumbling knight is as chipper as always.

Oh, well. I could always sneak an interception.

But I don't really need to as Pinocchio's voice cuts through the domestic setting.

"Ma'am, I finished with your door." And damn, he's been working like a champ. Poor dude worked up a lot of sweat. Even though I have a bad view from the floor, I can still see that the door has been worked on. The knob and lock shine out from the wood and a bunch of splintered and rotten pieces litter the floor. "If you can be so kind as to let me borrow a broom, I would gladly clean up the threshold before I leave."

D to the A to the M to the N. Now that is some quality service.

Punz lets Pinocchio borrow her broom and the guy keeps his word on cleaning the doorway. It's been sweating hellfire all day, and he's been working as hard as he could and hasn't complained for shit. Sometimes, you gotta let people know that they're appreciated.

So, when we start dealing with the payment, I paid the bill with my beloved emergency credit card. And guess what? The cost was even lower than what Mr. Geppetto had said earlier. When I asked, Pinocchio stated that he was here shorter than his father had expected, so the ending price was lowered. It was almost too easy to give him my emergency twenty dollar bill for a tip.

Trust me, when that damn door finally closed, I could easily say that he earned it. You could feel the air getting cooler by the second. Oh, he did try to say that it was too much, but I'm a stubborn bitch. All I need to know was that if I had to do that job, I would straight up quit and go freezer diving for chocolate ice-cream.

Sadly, he was a stubborn bastard, too. It did surprise me, but I still pushed. In the end, we came up with a deal. He took my twenty and gave me back a ten, but Pinocchio had to stay and eat one slice with us. It was an easy deal to make after I heard his own stomach grumble for food. He blushed, I teased, and we both won.

And after our little haggling battle, the apartment was almost calm again. Kristoff and Pinocchio were chatting and eating, Sven and Punz were playing with the little menace in white, and I finally had my pizza. I ate it one-handed as the other kept playing with Elsa's hair and tried to keep her calm.

It wasn't working too well since a giant of a man keeps trying to make the sick professor eat some delicious sodd. And since Elsa doesn't want to eat any sodd and Oaken is worried for her health, they're in a haggling battle, too. But this round has a lot less negotiating and more refusing from Elsa. She keeps ducking her head and even hiding inside her comforter cocoon to escape the bowl of sodd. I manage to stuff down three slices of the supreme pizza before Oaken admits defeat.

Even so, I can still see that he's worried. I sighed at his sad face and then I look to Elsa.

A small echo of the past springs up in the form of a purple, cowardly, cartoon dog name Courage. As random as it was, it helps to nudge me to help out.

So, I push the randomness out of my head for the moment, give Oaken a silent thumbs up, and I speak very softly.

"Elsa?"

"Hmm?" Her dazed eyes looked back to me.

"Didn't you say that you were hungry?" I know that she can't smell anything with her fucked up sinuses, so that means she really can't taste anything. But food is food.

"I no want that…"

"Oh, and what would you like to eat?" I cross my fingers to hope that it's the pizza. That is at least close by and she wouldn't have a chance to change her mind.

She mumbles out the words so badly that I had to ask her to repeat herself. When she does, I just can't stop my laugh.

Warning: Cuteness Level is on Dangerous. God, this woman is going to kill me with raw cute.

"Sven. Hand over that bag, please." I raise my voice to make sure the younger boy could hear me. He quickly gets up to get the plastic bag that he had set on the dining table with a little stinker following at his heels.

"Thanks, Sven." He gives me a shy little smile in return as he lies on the ground to play with Olaf. I watch for a bit as the little stinker tries biting at Sven's brown hair before I start looking though the plastic bag. At the bottom, three Giant Hershey's Chocolate Bars lay within. Each of them were a different flavor: milk chocolate, dark chocolate, and milk chocolate with almonds.

What can I say? A promise is a promise, and Elsa wants chocolate for lunch, so she's going to gets some. The only thing is that I didn't really know what her favorite kind of chocolate was, so I made Kristoff buy three just in case. Still, I pick out the milk chocolate, since it's kind of a safe bet. I'll just have the other two stored for Elsa for a later day.

I have to use both of my hands to break the bar off into a bunch of little squares, but I do it quickly. I move myself until Elsa's head is on my knees, so I have room for both the chocolates and her head to rest in my lap. Then, I open up the trusty water bottle next to me, so that it's ready. Too much chocolate can make the throat feel all dry and Elsa's is already sick as she is.

So, I carefully pick one chocolate up and gently hold it up.

"Elsa?" I sing-song her name.

It always seems that whenever I turn away, her eyes always close. It's true because when I keep calling to her, she always opens them. And she does it again with her sickly eyes. This time, she doesn't question me as I gently press the chocolate square to her lips.

And whoosh, it's gone.

Not really, but you know what I mean. I could hear Oaken chuckling before moving off, probably to store the sodd for later. All I can do is keep feeding the sick woman on my lap. After I see her swallow the first piece, I press another one to her mouth. This one also goes down without complaint.

I end up with a pattern to the feeding as I give two pieces of chocolate and then a couple sips of the water before repeating myself. And all through this, Elsa has this dopey smile as she eats the chocolate that I hand to her and as I start playing with her hair again. It's like a kid relaxing after finding out all of her dreams had come true.

Warning: Cuteness Overflow. Mayday, mayday. S.O.S.

But I stay in place, just loving the dazed happiness that she's in. I even give a few pieces to Sven since he's so close, but I make sure he know to not give any to Olaf. Chocolates are deadly for little stinkers like him.

So, this repetition happens for a while before I hear something that stops me cold. The clicking of a camera. The sound of blackmail at the ready.

Looking up, I can suddenly see the future.

Kristoff just sealed his fate.

He will die. Horribly and slowly.

Because the prancing troll just took a picture of me. But what he keeps forgetting is that I'm half-ninja, half-badass.

So, before the little troll-ish look could even begin to leave his face, I untangle my hand from Elsa's hair and reach for my phone. In a flash, I use all my strength to make my phone into a throwing star and hit the douche just above the wrist. He releases his phone with a bunch of curses and starts acting melodramatic again. Everyone else got a good chuckle at his pain.

I just stretch to the phones that fell onto the leather couch and pluck them right up. And who ever said anime and cartoons don't teach anything useful? Hump, I wish I could have gotten my star throw on camera to prove them all wrong.

I easily unlock the douche's phone and skim to the newest picture.

And... God damn it.

I hate to admit it, but Kristoff is a good photographer. He got the angle from just behind and a bit up from me. You couldn't see my face, but you could see how gentle I was in feeding the chocolate to the wrapped-up blonde. You could also see Sven licking chocolate from his lips and a white fluff ball tried biting at his wavy hair.

Really, it was a nice picture. Almost nice enough so that I don't immediately murder a certain someone. But far too dangerous to be left unsupervised.

So, I quickly sent the picture to my phone while making sure no trace of it was left in Kristoff's possession. Only then did I throw it back onto the couch. My own phone was unharmed due to my trustee case that protected it. The screen lit up with the new picture that was just received. As I powered it down for now, the TV powered up. I guess Sven grew bored and had asked for some cartoons.

And with all of this craziness happening, Pinocchio thought he could sneak away undetected. I guess he's not really good in loud crowds, like us. But we at least got to him and were able to say goodbye to him. I just fist bumped him as we said goodbye. I did get a bit down since he was a cool dude to be with, but I don't cling.

If we meet again, then we meet. Maybe I could recommend their services for the dorms' maintenance team.

As soon as the doors closed, Sven just plonked on the floor next to me and watched the cartoon that was playing. And déjà vu happened to hit me.

"Of course. Courage, the Cowardly Dog." Kristoff huffs out as he messes with Sven's hair. I myself just smile. Sven is obsessed with this show, even though it's old as shit.

Still, with how many times I've watched this with Sven, I can safely say that I've seen every episode for this old cartoon as well as I've seen every episode for Game of Thrones. And that's impressive since I don't put anywhere near that much effort to any other TV shows that are out there.

"HHOOOwwwwwlll… The things I do for love!"

And there goes his catchphrase. Even though he's a cowardly dog, Courage puts himself though wacky situations to save the woman who adopted him. It's a good lesson to learn, and it can be funny as hell when the moment is right.

But I've already seen this episode, so I look down at Elsa. Strangely, her eyes are still open and looking at me. She's waiting for something.

So, I easily reach over and begin playing with her hair again. That's all it takes for her to give a small yawn before fluttering her eyelids close. She still has the dopey smile as she sleeps.

Yep. That's all it takes to kill me with cuteness. Some dopey smile.

Still, I'm smiling as I suddenly feel warm.

I'm not saying that I'm in love with the blonde. Oh, hell no. But I can see a small part as to why Oaken has taken it upon himself to look after the duo. They're a pretty okay pair, and I had a lot of fun on what should have been a fucking horrible day.

So, as I lay back with old and new friends, I still have to wonder: Why didn't I leave when I had the chance? I'm not morally perfect, so I'm not cut out for sainthood. Even now, I still wonder why I stayed to help. I just kept making excuse after excuse to stay.

I looked down at the sleeping woman who was part of making this day pretty damn good in my book. I start thinking in my head, hoping that somewhere, she or someone would hear.

Maybe it not the things I do for love, because I don't know you. Maybe I am a crazy psycho.

But I hope you get better soon, Elsa. That way, I could learn more about you and your obsession of chocolate and medieval violence. I hope we could meet normally later on. So then, I could figure out why I did things the way I did.

The things I do for you.

AN: Author's note will be posted tomorrow.

Until next time, Au revoir.