Chapter 25

Burnt Toast

(Same day)

The room erupted with chatter as the meeting came to a close. People began to disperse and disapparate, Alex was the first to go.

Draco was being helped up from the ground by his parents, he was quite shaken, but unharmed.

"Severus," said The Dark Lord.

Snape turned to see Lord Voldemort beckoning him forward.

"A word," said Voldemort.

"Yes, My Lord," answered Severus Snape.

"Leave us!" ordered Lord Voldemort in a ringing hiss to the last remaining stragglers. Everyone hastened to leave, including the Malfoys, who had been reduced to visitors in their own home. Bellatrix gave Snape a fleeting glance of jealously before disapparating. She was the last to go; Voldemort and Snape were then alone.

"Severus, I have two important matters of business to discuss with you," began The Dark Lord.

"Of course," said Snape, bowing his head respectfully.

"The first matter of concern, as you may have guessed, is your cousin," said Voldemort.

"Ah, yes," said Snape.

"You are my most loyal servant and I trust your opinion above all my other deatheaters," said The Dark Lord.

"Thank You, My Lord," said Severus.

"Now tell me, do you believe your cousin to be completely devoted to my service?" asked Voldemort.

"My Lord," said Snape as he knelt at Voldemort's feet, "Alex is as devoted to you as I am."

"Very good," said Voldemort triumphantly. "You may stand, Severus."

Snape stood.

"I still have another matter to discuss with you," said The Dark Lord.

Snape's air stiffened as he waited for The Dark Lord to go on.

"I desire more information on the Order of the Phoenix," said Voldemort. Nagini, Voldemort's large snake slithered across the floor, up Voldemort's body and wrapped herself around his neck like a huge, scaly scarf.

"So you want me to investigate the old headquarters," said Snape his eyes watching the snake.

"Yes," Voldemort hissed, impressed that he had not needed to explain himself to Severus. "I need information, plans, disregarded papers, anything that I can use."

"Yes, My Lord," Snape bowed.

Voldemort turned his back to Severus, facing the fire and putting an end to the conversation.

Severus was about to disapparate when Voldemort spoke again. "Oh Severus," he said. "Take Alexandra with you."

Severus gave a fleeting nod, and then vanished.

When his feet found ground again he was in his own sitting room and it was just as he had left it.

Severus began to pace back and forth around the room, a favorite pastime of his, that he used to rid himself of his frustration; it never worked.

Severus let out a solitary, humorless laugh. The situation that he now found himself in was funny really; if you think about it.

"Is this what you wanted to happen, Old Man?" Severus asked Dumbledore's spirit. Snape began to pace faster. Dumbledore had thrown this girl to the wolves. Dumbledore could have kept her safe from all this; he could have taken Alex to the Order immediately after her family's death and never have brought her to Hogwarts, but Dumbledore did not care about the girl's safety. It was so like Dumbledore to use people for his own gain, but in Alex's case, he was not using her for himself but for Severus's benefit and Snape did not even want her to begin with. Dumbledore used her like he has used Harry and like he was using Snape now. Where Severus stood no one seemed to be better off by Dumbledore's help and yet he still obeyed the old orders of that dead man.

Severus stopped his aimless pacing as he remembered that Alex was probably in the house somewhere.

"Alex," He called out.

No answer.

"Alex!" he called a bit louder.

Again there was no answer.

Severus worried to where the girl was if she was not in the house. He suddenly got a flashback to an earlier conversation they had had. "I want to die," she had told him.

"Alex!" he yelled as he took long strides around the lower level of the house, peering into each room.

Suddenly as if contradicting his concern, a slight cough could be heard coming for upstairs.

Severus hurried up the stairs and once he reached the landing he stopped to listen. There was another cough and then the choking, lurching sound that came from someone who was being violently sick. Severus connected the sounds as coming from the lavatory.

Severus swung open the door to find his cousin half passed out with her arms resting on the seat of the toilet.

He rolled his eyes at what he had to deal with; not only was this girl a pain, she also had an active gag reflex, which made matters all the more worst.

"Alex!" shouted Severus to wake the girl up.

Alex glanced up weakly and gave Severus a wide, watery flash of her blue eyes before vomiting again into the toilet.

"Oh God," said Severus irritably. He reached towards the girl and held her long black hair away from her sick.

Before Severus could make any remarks on the girl's weakness of mind, body and stomach, Alex collapsed on the floor in a faint.

Severus pulled out his wand ready to perform a spell to revive the girl so that he could scold her properly when he really got a good look at the sickly state of the child in front of him.

She lay on the tiled floor shaking and breathing heavy. Her hair was askew and damp with sweat. She was paler than ever and her skin was clammy. Sick was caked on the corners of her mouth, the thin, pinkish acidity that occurred with malnourishment.

Severus had not noticed before that moment how much thinner Alex was since she had been at Hogwarts. Her school robes, which she still wore, hung limp and lifelessly off her small frame.

Severus bent to clean the residue from his cousin's mouth. Then he took Alex in his arms, which wasn't difficult and carried her downstairs to the sitting room. He placed her on his worn couch gently. Severus knelt at the girl's side and brushed the hair away from her face with his long, slender fingers. She was completely unresponsive to his touch or his presence.

"Renovate," Severus said as he pointed his wand at Alex. Her eyes opened fleetingly, but then closed again. "Alex, Alex," he called to her. Her eyes flickered again. Severus raised her into a sitting position with his left hand supporting her head. "Alex." He raised his wand and a small vial of blue liquid came floating towards him. "Alex, drink this," he ordered her. Without opening her eyes she parted her lips slightly. Severus poured the potion into her mouth and Alex choked it down.

"Better?" Severus asked her as he laid her back down.

Tears came from the corners of my shut eyes. "Yes," I said in a weak whisper. I opened my eyes to see Severus right beside me. As he stared down at me I wondered what he thought of me now for using an unforgiveable curse. Was he shocked that I could have ever done something so horrible? Or was he proud that I followed his instructions so well? Then I pondered which one was worse.

"Was Draco okay?" I asked him nervously.

The professor nodded.

Thank God, I thought.

There was a long silence.

"Draco will hate me now," I said finally as a few tears fell from my eyes.

"That is not of great concern," Severus told me. "You did what you had to."

I figured that in the language of Professor Snape, which is a tongue that no one will ever quite understand; these words were meant to be comforting, sort of. Don't worry that you friend hates you; you had to cause him excruciating pain.

I let out an audible sob at the thought of what I had done. I curled my knees to my chest to stop the feeling that my insides were going to explode. "I am evil now, aren't I?" I asked in a half shriek.

Severus stared at me for a long moment with his emotionless, black eyes. "No," he finally said.

I sat up shakily. "You really believe that?" I asked him, my words less hysterical.

"Yes," he said seriously.

Just his two short answers of no and yes made my tears stop falling.

Severus stood.

"You need nourishment," the professor proclaimed.

I stared up at him. "Are you going to cook for me again?" I asked him.

He looked at me as if to say 'What a stupid question, how else do you expect to eat?' but never the less he nodded.

"Oh," I said with exaggerated disappointment.

"What?" Severus asked exasperatedly.

I laughed. "You are a horrible cook."

He looked at me with mild disbelief. "Then what do you suggest we do?" Severus asked irritably, yet I did not think he was as annoyed as he let on, "seeing that you are in no condition to cook."

"You could order pizza," I suggested.

"Deatheaters do not order pizzas," he said as he walked into the kitchen.

Severus came sulking back five minutes later with two pieces of burnt toast on a chipped plate.

"You burnt it," I playfully told him as he handed me the plate.

"Just eat it," he told me impatiently

I laughed at his frustration. "Toast, really how hard is that," I joked.

"Eat," Severus ordered me.

I looked at him and smiled and he looked at me and of course didn't smile. "Okay Severus," I said before I took a bite. "Thank You."