Hope you're enjoying my story. Our couple will continue to work through issues. Love all of your comments so encouraging. Not sure where this will lead, we'll just have to see.

Can't forget to thank my international friends who bring my story clarity. Love you guys - Bree, Marjo, and Stella

Finally!, Chapter 6

Castle had been able to convince Kate to make veal in mustard sauce, one of his favorites, for tonight's dinner. It was actually more like begging than persuading, but it had worked and Castle was thrilled. Kate was a wonderful cook and he loved watching her work in the kitchen. She was so focussed, so intense, and when Kate was fully absorbed in her production, Castle slipped out to put some jazz on the stereo. He came back in, bringing a bottle of wine and glasses, which he poured while sneaking glances at her. She had put her hair up, but some wisps had escaped and fallen onto her face. Occasionally she blew them aside, never missing a beat. My God, he thought again, this woman was something to behold, she is truly extraordinary.

As one of his favorite songs started playing, he reached out and spun her around. Staring into her eyes he whispered "Dance with me?" Kate looked to her unfinished preparations, slightly annoyed, but when her eyes again met his, they melted her heart and she though what the hell. Kate pushed into his hips and as the dance began Kate realized this was their first dance together and a chill spread through her. He seemed to sense her thoughts and raised her face to bring her lips up to meet his, their mouths opened, passion flaring as they lost themselves in the moment.

"Well, well, well, does this mean dinner will be late?" Martha inquired as she entered the kitchen. Kate tried to push Castle away, but he held on, refusing to release her.

"Castle, let go, I need to finish dinner." she said as she smacked him on the chest.

Castle shrugged, "Okay, but only because I'm hungry. We will continue this later", he murmured as he ran his finger down her jaw.

Kate was flustered by his public display of affection, especially in front of his mother. Since her mother's death, she and her father had become so reserved, so insular and it was something she had long regretted.

Later that evening, Kate sat curled up on the couch, enjoying JD Robb's latest book. Years ago she had fallen in love with the author's hard-nosed female homicide detective from the 21st century. She related to the heroine, Dallas, someone who drove herself until the criminal was apprehended. She smiled as she recalled how much Dallas and Roarke's relationship paralleled Castle and hers. She sensed Castle's presence, reaching up behind her as he approached. He had been on a phone call for nearly an hour.

"That's amazing, how did you know I was coming?"

"Intuition, Castle, remember I'm a cop." Then she gave him a sly smile, "Besides I heard you step on the squeaky floorboard."

He bent down to kiss her neck and handed her a glass of red wine. She frowned, it was a full glass and she had a feeling something was up. He came around and sat next to her, sliding her feet under his thigh, looking crestfallen.

"OK Castle, spill. Now!"

"Am I that transparent?"

"Pretty much, but adorable with it, I might add."

Castle looked so serious that Kate's heart tightened, and her mind raced as she tried to identify what this mood change was about.

"My publisher wants me in LA to talk about the new book release and maybe a new book deal. It would be a 2 week trip."

Kate's face fell. She didn't want him to leave, they were finally in a good place. So in sync right now. She rubbed his forearm and looked up. "I-I know you have to go, it's your real job and you can't follow me around every day." A long sigh escaped as she stared into his hypnotic eyes. The thought of being without him for any length of time was unsettling. She attempted to give him a smile of encouragement as she touched his chin, his evening stubble was rough under her palm and brought her chills down to her toes.

"When do you leave?"' she asked, dreading the answer.

"Tomorrow. I'm so sorry, I don't want to leave you." As he brought her hands up and kissed her palms, he brightened and said "Wait, why don't you come with me."

She shook her head in sad resignation, "Cas- Rick, I can't leave now. We just started this new case, I'm stuck here." She had never before regretted her job, but up until now her job had never interfered with her personal life.

Sensing her frustration, Castle leaned in and lightly kissed her, whispering against her lips "We'll talk everyday... twice... three times a day." Laughing he saw her frown. "No, relax, we'll be okay. It's only two weeks, it will go by fast." they stared into each others eyes, neither believing what he said. It would be difficult to be apart, especially now.

Kate shrugged, resigned to their fate and responded, "I'll just go back to my apartment till you return."

"Why? You live here now."

"No, I don't Castle, I still have an apartment. Besides, I don't want to bother Martha and Alexis, it's their home, I' m here when you are, that's the deal."

As Kate got up from the couch, she winced slightly. Castle jumped up, grabbing her arm, "What was that?" he demanded.

Kate jerked her arm away, "Nothing, remember my side hurts sometimes. Drop it." Kate said irritated, not just about his concern, but also about how vulnerable she was. She turned so they were facing each other, both glaring.

"I'm fine. I'm going back to my apartment, period. End of discussion." The more she spoke the angrier she became. How dare he take for granted that she would stay in his house and wait for the big man to return. No way!

He put a hand on each shoulder, and Kate squirmed, trying to break his hold. The more she fought, the harder he gripped her. She refused to look at him, seething quietly. Now his voice began to rise,

"You are being ridiculous. Alexis! Mother! Can you please come here?"

"Rick, don't do this, stop it, I mean it!"

He yelled for his mother and Alexis again, still hanging on to Kate, knowing that if he let her go she'd run. He was infuriated with her, how could she think this wasn't her home?

The two other women appeared before them, apprehension in their features. It was clear that Kate and Castle were in the middle of a heated discussion.

"Richard, what's up?" Martha asked as she placed a hand on his shoulder, looking at Kate who was clearly upset.

"Yeah, what's up, Dad?" Alexis was also looking back and forth, her eyes widening, as she took in the scene in front of her. Wow, they were mad.

"Please, Rick, no, don't do this!" Kate implored him to stop, still trying to break his hold.

"I've got this!" He stated forcefully, his anger rising and hers nearly exploding, yet she held her tongue.

Turning to his mother and daughter he explained. "I have to go out of town for a couple of weeks, pre-release promos for my new book and maybe a new book deal. Kate is stuck here working and she thinks she should go back to her apartment."

"Absolutely not!" Martha interrupted, "she lives here. In fact, I want to know why she hasn't officially moved in here yet."

Stunned, Kate looked at the three of them, as she shook her head, suddenly feeling out of control and off balance. The fight in her was quickly dissipating as she lowered her gaze and stared into the carpet.

"OK Mother, thank you, I'm... we're working on our relationship' Rick cut Martha off as he shook Kate's shoulders gently, "Look at me," his head dipped down trying to catch her eyes.

"No, Rick, it's OK, she only wants to help. Martha, it's not him, it's me, I'…I-I'm not sure I'm ready for such a life change. I just need a little time," her voice was stilted, as she tried to explain something she didn't quite understand herself.

Martha was immediately apologetic. "I'm sorry, kiddo, it's just that Richard has finally returned to the man he was before last summer. It was a hard time, for all of us, but now you are here, right where everyone wants you to be. I understand that you and he still have some issues to work out, but, well, that's life. You understand?"

Kate nodded, still not looking up. Rick's grip on Kate had gentled, and he slid his hands down her arms to hold her hands lightly.

"Now, back to the question at hand, Alexis and I want you here, we would love to have you, so please stay. Besides, think of the fun we can have with him gone." Martha's eyes sparkled, full of mischief as she waived towards her son.

Her enthusiasm calmed Kate's nerves and she smiled back at Martha, before looking to Alexis, who was nodding in agreement. Castle released his hold on Kate and fell to his knees.

"Pllllllease stay," Castle whined, his hands clasped in a prayer gesture.

Kate began laughing. "Get up Rick, you're an idiot!"

Only if you say you'll stay?"

"Okay, I'll stay!" shaking her head and marvelling that it had taken so little to win her over.

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It started slowly, and with each touch the intensity grew as both of them realized they would be apart for some time. For tonight, it was all about them. Once they were both satisfied, they quickly drifted off to sleep, content in each other's arms.

Much later, Kate opened her eyes and watched at Rick as he slept. A small smile of contentment spread on her face, she loved him so much. Suddenly, panic gripped her. She didn't deserve him. She had left him alone for three months and lied to him, how could he ever forgive that! With this thought, her instinct was to run and her panic overtook her. As she moved, the pain in her side was so sharp she gasped and stumbled, but continued on, searching for her clothes.

Castle heard the commotion and opened his eyes sleepily, what was Kate doing rushing around? As he looked at her, he could see panic written all over her face. Oh no, no, no, no, no. Rick bolted from bed and clutched at her arm.

"Where do you think you're going?" he demanded.

"I can't do this, I'm so sorry. I don't deserve you, I'll only break your heart. We're both fooling ourselves to think this will ever work." Her words choking in her throat, came out in a rush of emotion.

"Hang on a minute Kate, you can do this, we can do this. We'll make it work. You're not running away from me again. The only way you will break my heart is if you leave, get it? Or wasn't I clear enough today?"

Kate was starting to hyperventilate, the pain from her side immobilising her and dizziness engulfed her. Castle saw how she had paled. Uh-oh, he thought, she's going to pass out. He sat her down on the edge of the bed and put her head between her knees. He hadn't paid any attention to their state of undress, and right now it didn't matter. He squatted down, rubbing the back of her head. "Kate, take a deep breath and relax. What's brought this on?"

"Nothing", Kate raised her face, lying to him yet again. "I'm so sorry Rick..."

"Kate," he said gently, looking into her eyes, "listen to me. We may have a lot to work on, but it's nothing that we can't handle. We've experienced the worst and survived, to be here together now. When I return, I think we should go and talk to Dr. Burke together. What do you think?"

Still sitting on the edge of the bed, she frowned, closed her eyes and rubbed her hands together. Nodding, she said, "That may be a good idea. Dr Burke has wanted me bring you in, but I wasn't ready. I didn't know if you would want to go with me, it can be really tough and emotional, and I'm not very nice when I'm pushed," she laughed. "He doesn't let me hide." Kate looked at Castle, stunned that he would go through this with her. She realised she wasn't going to be able to hide or lie much longer.

"Good, that's settled. Now can we get back to bed? I'm freezing." She looked at Castle and noticing they were naked, she laughed, crawling back into bed. Wrapping her back in his arms, they drifted back to sleep.

They woke early and enjoyed a leisurely time caressing, exploring, and memorising each other, knowing their time together was limited, for now. They had fallen into an easy rhythm and could alternate from a slow pace to a frenzied passion, as he had learned what drove her crazy, and she could lead him off the cliff just as easily.

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Castle had only been gone three days and Kate was already exhausted. She hadn't wanted to admit that she wasn't one hundred percent before he left, knowing he would have cancelled his trip. She was spending long hours searching the murder board, trying to figure out who the killer was, and so far there were no leads. The victim was a 44 year old advertising executive, found in her office with her head bashed in. The CSU team had found little physical evidence of the crime, how was that possible? Kate found herself longing for one of Castle's crazy theories as she rubbed hands over her eyes and looked at the clock. It was after midnight and it had been another long night with nothing to show for her effort. The boys were long gone and she was lonely and just wanted to hear his voice. She picked up the phone, and dialled, but it went straight to voice mail. Damn. He was probably out with the publishers. She had found she couldn't sleep without him next to her., and her side had been waking her when she did manage to fall asleep. Each time she took a breath, she felt a burning sharp pain, which she knew was not a good sign, but she just kept pushing, hoping to get through.

Each evening Kate made sure she was home for dinner, as even though she had little appetite, she wanted to spend time with Alexis and Martha if she was there. But her focus was Alexis, as Kate knew she owed it to the young woman to show her she would not going to leave again. Once their time together was winding down in the evening, she would excuse herself and return the precinct.

As tomorrow was Saturday, Kate and Alexis were planning on going to the street fair on 45th & Lexington. She loved how Alexis had reminded her of the simple pleasures in life. Castle, and Martha, had done a beautiful job of raising this bright, witty and well grounded young woman.

She sighed and rubbed the back of her neck, as on top of everything else, she had a horrible headache. Too much caffeine perhaps, and not enough sleep. She was getting nowhere fast, but she shook her head, she had to stay and try to solve this crime. There would be time to rest after it was solved. Looking at her father's watch on her wrist, she realised it was 5:30 am, maybe if she closed her eyes for just a few minutes.

The alarm on her computer woke her at 8:00 am. Kate sat up, confusion on her features as she took in her surroundings. Oh no. Dialling the phone, she started talking as soon as she heard the connection.

"Hey Alexis. I...I'm stuck at the station, gotta take a rain check for today. I'm so sorry, I was really looking forward to it, we'll reschedule, OK?"

Kate could hear the disappointment in Alexis' voice, just as they had been making some progress in their relationship. Damn it!

Around midnight, she crept quietly into the loft. Seeing a red ponytail hanging over the couch, she smiled. Good, Alexis was still up watching TV. Kate slipped off her boots and slid down next to Alexis, "I'm sorry about today. This case has me baffled, and God, help me but I need your dad." she rolled her eyes, and they both chuckled. "You OK?" Kate asked, smiling as Alexis nodded and snuggled in. She had forgotten the wonderful feelings this type of closeness invoked. They sat together for a while, just watching TV, but when Kate felt herself falling asleep she slowly rose, leaned over and kissed the top of Alexis head. "Think I'll go to bed and call your dad." Alexis jumped slightly when she felt Kate's touch. Wow, she felt really hot.

Kate slipped into bed, digging into the covers, she was freezing. She hit favourites on her phone and he answered on the first ring. "Detective you've made my day."

"Hey", she replied, her voiced sounded tired and hoarse.

Instantly, Castle sensed something was awry. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," she growled. "I'm just tired and I miss you and your wild theories Castle." She reviewed the case for him and asked, "Any wild theories, I'm up for anything."

"Hum let think on that, maybe she... " as he was talking, he realised it had gone eerily quiet.

"Kate? Beckett?" his heart jolting as there was no answer.

Castle immediately called his daughter, "Alexis, sorry it's late Pumpkin, but would you please go in and check on Kate, I think she went to sleep while we were talking."

Alexis walked in and Kate was asleep, her phone resting on her cheek. Alexis took the phone and shut it off. "She's out to it Dad. Kate's been working non stop. She comes home for dinner, but then leaves and doesn't come back until really late, if at all. She doesn't look good, and we're worried, she won't let us help her. Is she always this stubborn?" Castle chuckled, Alexis had figured out Kate fairly quickly, and he was impressed but not surprised.

"Keep an eye on her and I'll wrap this up as soon as possible."

Noise. Gunshots. Kate flew out of bed and collapsed on the floor, her side screaming. What the hell? Her body was trembling and her mind was struggling to determine where she was. Kate placed her head on the bed, and she realized she was burning up. This was getting worse, but she couldn't stop now, she had to solve the case. Looking at the clock on the beside table, she realised it was 2:00 am. She groaned and sat for a few minutes, trying to gather enough energy to make her way back to the precinct.

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Kate had lost track of time, and was not sure what day it was. Her last meal was... she honestly wasn't sure. Martha had wanted to bring her something on Sunday night, but Kate had lied and told her she had already eaten. Her exhaustion had brought out cranky Beckett, who neither needed nor wanted help from anyone. She realized it was nearly 8:00 am Monday morning, where were Esposito and Ryan? Soon, they strolled into the precinct, laughing as usual.

"Keeping banker's hours boys?" She said sarcastically. "Come on, get moving Esposito, check out the neighbors; Ryan, her secretary. Someone had to see something. Get going, this case isn't going to solve itself."

"Beckett, we already did that."

"Well", she rubbed her hands on her face, "do it again!" She was tired and cranky and just wanted them to do what she asked!

Her headache had become excruciating, her side was screaming, her whole body throbbed. She was in desperate need of some water and gritting her teeth, she started walking towards the water cooler. Espo called out to her. Why did he sound like he was in a tunnel. As she turned to face him, everything became fuzzy and slowed down. Just as she realised she was going to faint, she collapsed.

When consciousness returned, she was lying on the break room couch, how did that happen? She opened her eyes, everything on fire, aching and her body shaking. She tried to get up, but was held down.

"Let me up, Esposito!" Kate attempted to swing at Esposito's arm, her rage keeping her conscious.

"No, you're staying there. Lanie's on her way."

Kate groaned and placed her arm over her eyes. Fine! She couldn't have gotten up even if she had tried. Voices continued to fade in and out, and Kate knew it was serious.

Hey, girlfriend what's up?" Lanie had arrived and knelt next to Kate's horizontal body.

"I'm just tired, let me up. I've been working long hours, Ok?"

Holding her down, Lanie got right into Kate's face, "Listen, you may be able to bully writer boy and these two fools, but not me! Fess up!"

Kate turned her head away, trying to ignore her friend. But Lanie wasn't about to give up, she grabbed Kate's face, turning it so she could look at her. What she saw made her stomach flip, Kate's face was flushed yet deadly pale and her eyes were lifeless. With one swift movement, Lanie raised Kate's top, her left side was red, hot to touch, and she pressed the angry flesh. Lanie's movement occurred so fast, Kate was unable to brace against the examination, and her touch resulted in a severe bout of discomfort. Kate's back arched and her body shivered, and she gritted her teeth, trying to remain silent but a groan slipped out. Kate's breathing became rapid and shallow as she recovered from the physical assault.

"You should go to the hospital, Kate."

"No, please, no, I can't, I can't go through that again. I can't, no, no, I-I... Kate's eyes were huge filled with tears, her face displaying the terror of the recent past events. Her body was shaking uncontrollably. Her illness had made her vulnerable to exposing her fears.

Lanie turned to Espo and Ryan, saying, "Get her home, now."

"No, I'm fine. Give me a minute", Kate argued weakly.

"Either you let them take you home or I'm calling an ambulance and you'll go to the hospital. Am I clear?" Lanie glared at her sick friend.

Kate glared right back, neither yielding. Yet Kate was too weak to continue the fight with Lanie, she knew she would lose.

"Espo, Ryan just take me home!" she snarled as she tried to rise.

When Ryan opened the door to the loft, both Martha and Alexis were standing in the entry. Lanie had called them and alerted them to the situation.

Kate stormed in, pushed past the boys, threw her coat on a chair, unsteady but determined. "I'm home, you satisfied?" Her voice raspy yet definitely irate. Her breathing hurt worse than ever.

The women simultaneously raised their eyebrows, staring at Kate. Espo quickly updated them, while Kate scowled at them the entire time.

"Great you've reported in, now leave." Her fury continued to grow. She hated being sick and helpless. Tears were filling her eyes. When had she become such a cry baby? The boys were just about ready to leave when Kate announced to all within ear shot, "I'm going to my apartment, I need to be alone!"

Kate turned on her heel, swayed slightly, her teeth clenched. Martha stopped her, one arm on her shoulder, using the other to feel her forehead.

"You're burning up, kiddo. Lanie called Dr Steiner and he is coming to see you.

The mention of her thoracic surgeon's name brought chills to her heart. "I don't need him. I'm fine. Let me go." Kate's frustration was mounting.

"No, you're not fine. You're staying here, got it?"

"I don't need to be taken care of!" Kate was shaking uncontrollably, all from sickness, fear and anger.

Martha's grip on her arm tightened, and Kate was unable to escape, not that she wanted to leave, she just didn't want anyone to see her like this. Something in Martha's tone made it through her feverish brain, and quietened Kate down.

Kate looked over at the boys, then over to Alexis. She knew everyone was concerned for her. As her anger left her, she felt her body again begin to collapse. She reached for Martha's arm, grasping at air. Not again, unable to fight the enviable, she felt herself being drawn back into darkness as she tumbled into Martha arms.