This fic has sat in my drawer for almost a year.
Angst alert. You were warned.
Broken
He had been carelessness again. He had hurt her with his negligent behavior. Blue eyes, filled with tears, met the golden ones she was so used to... used to love, used to care. Love was not in question. It never had been.
They loved each other. However, like the serpent that eats his own tail, their relationship had a destructive cyclic nature. All the love in the world was not enough to prevent them to grow apart. When that happened, her insecurity would show. And he was always unable to deal with her fragilities... Instead, he would grow angry and cold. Then, he would become negligent in their relationship, distancing himself from her, until they burst into a fight.
Angry words cut more than samurai swords: they are sharper and accurate. But the silence that followed was even worst. It was a silence born from having had the same discussion too many times before… with the same result.
In a sense, they loved each other too much. They had fallen apart too many times before. They had tried to move on without each other. But, every single time, they found their way back to each other arms. Just to end up like this… both hurt, both defeated, both broken.
Why would they always end up hurting each other? The same man she shared a bed with and with whom she cuddled every night, was sat in the couch as far away from her as possible, after uttering the most hurtful things about her she had ever heard.
He was so close to her and, yet, so far…
She felt the need to leave and never see his face again. To hurt him like he had hurt her.
To see if he loved her enough to run after her…
But she knew this pattern all too well. She wouldn't leave. She had never left him before. She loved him too much for that… Besides, that was his role. He was always the one to give up and run away. But he always would come to his senses and eventually got back to her. Because he loved her as well.
How did they become this? When did they become this shadow version of their happy past? When did the fairytale end and this nightmare begun? Or there never had been a fairytale at all, only this dysfunctional relationship?
His golden eyes were clouded with pain and sorrow. She could see the reflection of her hopelessness on them.
She wanted nothing more than reach out for him, grab his hand and pull him close. However, she couldn't find in her the strength to do it. So, she just sat there, in silence, staring into the nothingness, feeling the love of her life slip through her fingers.
Love can be a salvation or a curse. And their cursed love had turned them into this: two damned souls, damaged and broken.