Disclaimer: I do not own Saiyuki or it's characters. They belong to Kazuya Minakura, Tokyopop and all those other wonderful peoples. All I own are my OC's.

Note: This chapter was originally chapter 10. But Then I got caught jotting down my little extra ideas for Kugo and such, and decided to change it up.

~Recollection~

Sanzo stood before The Three Aspects. They had just told him to do the impossible…

"Why?" he asked them. "Why must I separate them?"

"Because, Genjo Sanzo," the female, Peace, on the left spoke. "There is one you will not be able to control and the other will obey your every command."

"The closer you get to one," the female on the right, Chaos, added. "the more distant the other will become."

"The choice is up to you, Genjo Sanzo," the male in the center, Neutrality, continued. "Choose wisely."

"I HATE YOU!"

Sanzo heard a distressed, pain-filled cry as he walked away carrying Goku on his back.

"NII-CHAN!"

This is why Sanzo must never get close to anyone…A position like this would have tore him apart.

As Sanzo neared Goku's bedroom door to check up on him, he heard Goku's groans as he awoke. Sanzo entered and Goku caught his faint scent.

"Sanzo?" Goku asked.

He sat down on the stool near his bed.

"How are you feeling?"

Goku put a hand on his forehead as he sat up.

"My head's spinnin'…"

"Here."

Sanzo handed him a glass of water. Goku took it and drank it all in a few gulps.

"Hey, Sanzo?"

"Yes?"

"Are ya ok?"

"I'm fine," he stood up and turned to walk away. "Why do you ask?"

"Ya seem kinda pale…"

Sanzo walked to the door frame and paused.

"Get some rest." he replied and walked out of the room.

Sanzo noticed that Goku continued to roam the halls aimlessly. One of the monks even informed him that that's all he's been doing.

"He hasn't even finished his meal." the monk had explained earlier that day as Sanzo was trying to finish some paperwork.

He took a break from the papers and decided to see what Goku was up to. He found him staring at the Merciful Goddess's peach tree.

"Goku." he called, catching the teen's attention.

But Goku didn't turn to look at him. Sanzo walked up to him and also stared at the peach tree for a moment.

"What are you doing?" Sanzo asked him.

"Those peaches look delicious…" the teen answered.

"Don't even think about it."

"Yeah, yeah. I know."

Goku walked away from the tree and toward the temple. He seemed sluggish.

'I knew it.' Sanzo thought as he watched him.

Goku walked down the hall almost bumping into a monk, who exclaimed:

"Watch where you're going!"

"Sorry…" Goku softly mumbled and continued to walk.

The monk spotted Sanzo and gave him a 'What's wrong with him?' stare. Sanzo sighed and decided to follow the teen.

'He misses her.' Sanzo continued thinking. 'He just doesn't know who exactly.'

Goku walked all the way around the temple and stopped at Sanzo's work room, where Sanzo worked on some papers earlier and noticed he wasn't there yet. Then, he noticed he was right behind him, so he stepped aside. Sanzo walked in and sat in his chair to continue on his work. Goku stood at the door frame, seemingly lost in thought.

"Don't block the entrance." Sanzo said not looking up from his work.

"Oh…" was Goku's answer before entering the room and sitting under the window near his master.

After about an hour of silence and work, Sanzo glanced over at the teen who looked to be thought. The teen stared at his hands, clenching and un-clenching them.

"Tell me." Sanzo said mentioning as to what he was thinking about.

"I lost somethin'." Goku answered.

"You lost something?" Sanzo meant it as a question but it came out more as a statement.

"Yeah…Somethin' important."

'Gota…' Sanzo thought.

He turned in his chair and stared at his finished paper work.

"What did you lose?"

"Don't know…Don't remember."

'I'm sorry…' Sanzo thought.

"What did you eat today?" Sanzo couldn't continue to talk about something he forced him to forget.

"Rice…Miso soup…Tofu…"

"Was it good?"

"Didn't finish it…"

Silence.

"But maybe if I had some peaches for dessert…"

"Forget it." Sanzo interrupted him.

"I'm jokin'!"

The room filled with silence once more.

"Hey, Sanzo."

"Hm?"

"Do ya know what I lost?"

"If you describe it to me."

Goku stayed silent, trying to remember his lost importance. He stared at his hands again. But he never answered Sanzo. He couldn't…

Goku continued on like this for another two weeks. He wouldn't finish his meals and would leave the rest of it to waste. Sanzo would sometimes follow him to see where he would end up, but he always just led him back to his work room. There, the teen would keep his master company by sitting under the window near him. It was now the end of the second week.

"Sanzo?"

"Yes, Goku." he replied.

"It hurts…"

Sanzo froze. He was afraid something like this was going to happen. Just like girl had said before:

'Something bad happens when we're apart…'

"What hurts?" Sanzo took a deep breath.

"Not bein' able ta remember." Goku closed his eyes. "Somethin's missin'…and it hurts."

Sanzo's heart ached. Even when he erased Goku's memory of his sister, he still remembers she exists; he still remembers he lost her…even if he doesn't actually remember.

"You've been saying that for the past two weeks, Goku. I think that's enough."

"'Cuz it's true!" Goku abruptly stood up. "Somethin' is missin', an' ya probably know what it is, but ya won't tell me!"

Sanzo didn't answer him. Goku's right…But he can't remind him of her. His job was to get rid of one of them; he was ordered to because…

"Hellooo? Mr. Droopy-eye…Wake up!"

Sanzo blinked, finally coming back to reality. In front of him was Gota, who was waving her hand in front of his face.

"'Bout time!" she exclaimed.

They stood off to the side of the town's market, as not to be in peoples way. The only one near Sanzo was Gota. He looked at her, his eyes asking where everyone else went.

"They went on ahead," she answered his eyes. "Since ya weren't respondin' ta anythin'. I stayed here with ya, 'cuz I know ya probably woulda been lost."

"Where's Goku?"

"With Hakkai-sama." she started walking away from him. "Well? C'mon! We won't catch up ta 'em if we just stand here."

'They didn't give me a legitimate reason to get rid of her…' Sanzo thought. 'But I have a thought as to why…'

"C'mon, slow poke!" Gota waved at him a few feet in front of him.

'You see what happened?' he continued thinking as if the three heads could read his mind.

"Look! There they are!" Gota exclaimed smiling and already running ahead. "Hakkai-sama!"

"Hey!" Hakkai greeted her.

"Sanzo! Hurry or we're gonna havta wait…" Goku called. "Man, I'm starvin'!"

"Y'know? I'm really gettin' tired of hearin' you say that..." Gojyo roughly put a hand on Goku's head.

Sanzo closed his eyes in relief and followed the group as they entered the restaurant.

'I can't get rid of her that easily…'

Chapter 13! Finally, right? :D

I'm not exactly sure how I feel about this chapter. I apologize for this chapter, it's a bit on the short side. Hope you all enjoy it!

Kugo: R&R...please.