He sped the entire way home.
His heart raced as he pulled into the drive, panic flaring under his skin. He had no idea how Kurt might have gotten here as there were no other cars but something drew him back here, right where it had all begun.
And just as he'd hoped, he was standing right outside his door.
Gasping out in relief, Darren quickly unfastened his belt, springing out of the car. He took the stairs too at a time, racing up to meet him.
"Kurt," he gasped out, reaching the top of the stairs, "let me-"
"How long have you been keeping this from me?" Kurt demanded, whirling around to face him. Darren's heart clenched at the sight of his red rimmed eyes, brimming with hurt and he halted, right in front of him.
"A week," he admitted softly. "I… I couldn't find the right moment to tell-"
"To tell me what, Darren?" Kurt interrupted sharply, arms folded defensively across his chest. "Were you ever even going to tell me or were you just going to dump me the morning of your flight?"
"You think I would do that to you?" Darren asked, recoiling in horror.
"You've been keeping-"
"You've kept things from me too!" Darren shot back, instantly regretting his words as Kurt froze.
"Don't bring that into this," Kurt said coldly and Darren's face screwed up in apology.
"I'm sorry," he said quietly, "I… I haven't even decided if I'm taking it…" he offered, as if that would help.
It didn't.
"Darren," Kurt breathed, the shock evident across his features, "of… of course you have to take it."
"But what about us?"
Kurt sighed and Darren's stomach sunk as he realised what was coming next.
"I don't know."
Kurt agreed to stay the night just as they'd planned.
They slept restlessly, both hiding their tears behind clenched lids, Darren's arms wrapped around Kurt's waist as he snuggled against his chest. In the morning Kurt woke first, to his phone buzzing. He untucked himself from Darren's embrace, his heart clenching at Darren's little whimper as he grabbed for him.
He found his phone in the pocket of his jeans, sprawled out on the floor along with Darren's. He flipped it open, his heart lifting ever so slightly at the message that played across the screen.
Guess who our net regionals soloist is? spoiler alert: his name starts with K ;)
He climbed back into bed then, kissing the contented sigh right off Darren's lips as he settled back into his embrace.
"It looks like we're both getting what we wanted," Kurt whispered over the lump in his throat.
Darren slept on; oblivious, as Kurt cried himself back to sleep.
LINEBREAK
When Darren finally woke, his heart plummeted as he realised he was alone, the sheets cool and tangled around him.
He had, at least, left a note.
Had to get back home. I love you.
-Kurt
He shook his head, his whole body cold as he turned away with a sigh.
He tried to continue on as normal; spending the morning pattering about with menial tasks to distract himself.
He was doing the dishes by hand when Joey came home, his expression wary as he pushed through the door.
"Hey," he greeted him carefully, "how are… things?"
Darren shrugged, not quite meeting his eye.
"Pretty shit," he admitted quietly.
Joey nodded, patting his shoulder gently before slinging his bag back over his shoulder, retreating to his room.
The best part about Joey:
He'd never say 'I told you so'.
Kurt hated to leave him like this.
But he didn't think he could leave at all if he waited.
He had taken a taxi home the night before, but simply opted for the bus this time, giving himself time to try and collect his thoughts.
He managed to make it the entire way home before he broke down.
He made it through the front door, into the living room where he spotted Finn who looked up at him with concerned eyes.
"Kurt? Are you okay, man?"
And then he lost it, Finn rushing to his side, holding him as he crumpled, his entire frame shaking with the force of his sobs.
"Darren," he choked, "he's leaving. He's leaving me."
Finn's palm was broad and warm as it rubbed reassuring patterns up and down his back.
"Shhh," he soothed, "it's all going to be okay."
If only he could believe him.
The rest of the day was no better.
Finn tried to get him to talk but it was no use. Every time he tried to explain he would start crying again.
Finn was alarmed, Kurt could tell. He asked if he wanted him to call Burt or his mom but Kurt declined.
A nap, he said. He would take a nap.
(He slept past dinner, his lashes clumped closed with his tears.)
Darren was a mess.
He tried calling Kurt several times to no avail.
"He just needs space," Joey tried.
"We need to talk," Darren had objected desperately, his throat thick. "Couples talk."
"Just give him time," Joey insisted over his tired sigh.
Time, Darren thought bitterly, resisting the urge to throw his phone out the window, that was the one thing they had never had.
Sunday evening after sleeping so long, Kurt ventured out to the living room where Finn was watching a football game on TV.
"Hey, little bro," Finn said softly, carefully, as if worried he might burst into tears again.
"Have you eaten yet?" Kurt asked, mustering up a smile.
Finn shrugged, face falling a little guiltily. "I was gonna order a pizza but…"
Kurt wrinkled his nose, suddenly overwhelmed at the heaviness in his stomach. He hadn't eaten all day.
"How about I make some of that green pasta you like so much?"
Finn's entire face lit up. "Thanks, man!" he said enthusiastically. "And after can we watch that movie, the one with the dead pirate and you can make some of that warm milk?"
Kurt felt a smile tugging at his lips, his chest feeling just a little lighter.
God, he as much as he hated to admit it, he'd missed Finn. He'd missed him a lot.
"Sure, Finn," he agreed. "That sounds good."
It did.
Darren didn't sleep all night.
He didn't go to bed, either, unable to face the loneliness that impended. He instead stayed on the couch, curled up with his guitar and notebook, trying to jot down his feelings on paper, coming up with the exact representation of what he was feeling.
Shit.
It was nearing midnight when the front door burst open and Darren's entire heart leapt. It wasn't unusual for any of their friends to spring impromptu visits on them at any time of day (or night or morning) but the name that immediately fell off his lips made his stomach twist.
"Kurt?"
Charlene's face fell in horror. "Oh my god, I'm so sorry," she said immediately, turning to leave, "I can go-"
"No!" Darren cried. "No," he
sighed, "I'm sorry, come in."
She smiled carefully, taking another hesitant step forward, closing the door gently behind her.
"So… how are… things?"
Darren groaned, burying his face in his notebook.
"God, Charlene," he moaned, "everything's a mess."
Charlene sat down beside him, petting his hair gently. "I have time," she insisted.
They didn't talk about it.
For a few hours, Kurt let himself forget about everything and just lay back on the couch, sipping his warm milk and listening to the odd comfort of Finn's voice, mooning about all the latest Glee Club drama. Kurt wasn't sure how much of it he genuinely processed, but it was nice all the same. He and Finn hadn't spoken in so long.
He'd never thought he'd be able to miss him that much.
Eventually, Finn got to his feet, stretching up with an obnoxious yawn.
"I think I'm going to go to bed," he said, shooting Kurt a concerned look, "are you going to be okay, little bro?"
Kurt nodded, even though he wasn't so sure. "I guess I should go to bed too," he said with a grudging smile.
And so they did.
When Darren finished talking, Charlene's face was torn with upset.
"Oh god, Darren, I'm so sorry," she said earnestly. "But you knew it had to come out sometime."
"I know," Darren sighed. "I just wish I'd been the one to tell him… and sooner."
Charlene nodded in understanding, patting his knee gently. "Have you tried to call him?"
Darren's expression was all the answer she needed.
"Well, to be frank, my dear," Charlene said with a small smile, "you've never been particularly good with words."
Darren sighed. "I wouldn't even know what to say if he picked up the phone…"
"That's why you need to speak to him in person," Charlene said, a sudden grin melting over her lips, her eyes sparkling with an idea, "with less words as opposed to…"
"As opposed to…?" Darren prompted.
"Lyrics," Charlene said, grinning. "You need a song."
Kurt managed through his morning as if things were normal. He was perhaps quieter than usual, but he passed it off as tiredness.
If no one believed him no one said anything.
At lunch all his friends were mysteriously busy so he sat in the library by himself, flicking through his homework absently, his fingers twitching towards his phone. He hadn't spoken to Mercedes or Rachel in weeks and he hated how much he missed them, how much he missed everything.
He never thought he could miss his old school so much.
(He'd never thought he'd want to go back).
Darren pulled up to Dalton with nerves fluttering in the pit of his stomach. He spotted Kurt's car in the driveway and had to fight the urge to park beside it.
No, he couldn't know.
Not yet, anyway.
He had already contacted the school and spoken to Wes, the Warbler council president, over the phone and he had agreed to organise a Warblers meeting (sans Kurt) at lunch time so they could all talk.
They were already waiting for him when he found them, in the senior commons, as promised.
He bit back a laugh at how stiff and serious they all looked, perfectly coordinated in uniform and slicked back hair.
God, how did Kurt stand it?
"Hey, guys," he said, feeling suddenly underdressed in his old jeans, Michigan hoodie and saddle shoes, his pink glasses tucked into his pocket. He ran hand through his messy hair, feeling oddly judged as their eyes ran over him. He pushed his glasses up with an absent thumb as Wes stood to greet him.
"Fellow Warblers," he said, smiling charmingly as he crossed the room to Darren, "this is Warbler Kurt's boyfriend, Darren Criss."
The Warbler's expressions melted from guarded to understanding and they smiled up at him.
Well, all except one of them.
Darren didn't dwell on it, however, happily shaking Wes's hand before turning to the collective.
God, they were like the Borg, but in blazer jackets.
He fought a shudder, suddenly intimidated.
"Hey," he said again with a wave, "I'm Darren… I err… I was wondering if I could ask a favour." He turned to Wes. "Is that okay…?"
"The floor is yours," Wes said grandly, sweeping back to his own seat.
"So here's the deal," Darren continued, "I… er… Kurt and I got into a bit of a fight on the weekend," he fought a wince at the memory and the other's Warblers were sympathetic, "and I wanted your help apologising… through song."
A few of them emitted excited whispers and Darren grinned at their enthusiasm.
One petulant looking one, however, turned to Darren with a sneer.
"Why should we help you, anyway?" he objected. "You're the one who hurt our friend."
Darren instantly recoiled. Who was this kid?
"Hunter," Wes cut in sharply, glaring at him before turning back to the group. "Darren's even been so kind as to arrange the piece in acapella for us. We were thinking we could perform tonight, after dinner in the commons?"
"I like this plan," Darren voiced, still slightly wary of the blonde who had folded his arms sulkily.
"All in favour?" Wes asked. All the Warblers raised their arms in answer.
Hunter still sat still.
"Hunter," Wes snapped, glaring at him until he grudgingly raised his hand. He turned back to Darren with a grin. "We better get practicing, then."
The rest of Kurt's day passed drearily.
After classes were out for the day they told him Warbler practice had been postponed until after dinner, something that was practically unheard of and Kurt was pissed off. He just wanted to go home and go to bed early.
So he stayed and managed to finish his work in the library before dinner. He sat with his friend from math class, Adam who chatted animatedly about his upcoming soccer game while Kurt poked out his chicken and pretended to be interested, when really his mind was restless.
His phone had 1o missed calls, all from Darren, but none within the past day.
What if it was too late?
What if he'd ruined this forever.
Tears pricked behind his lids at the thought and he finally excused himself, dumping his half eaten dinner in the bin on his way out.
He was speeding towards the bathroom when a voice tugged him back from down the hall.
"Kurt!" it was Mason, a kid from his French class. To Kurt's surprise a flurry of kids pushed past him as Mason stumbled over, breathless and excited. "Where are you going? You're going to miss it!"
"Miss what?" Kurt asked, confused.
Mason grinned.
"Impromptu performance in the Warblers Hall."
"What?" Kurt cried after him, but he was already gone, racing along with the crowd.
Kurt barely had time to catch his breath before he was running after, his feet taking him quickly thorugh the flow of students as he darted past, the halls clicking beneath his feet.
By the time he reached the commons, half the school was already gathered around, watching as the Warblers began their harmonies and their lead began to sing.
I know a place that we can go to
A place where no one knows you
They won't know who we are
Kurt felt numb all over as he watched and the world stilled around him until their surroundings were just a distant blur and it was just them.
Only them.
Because Kurt knew that voice.
It was him.
Darren.
I know a place where we can hide out
And turn our hearts inside out
They won't know who we are
Kurt felt tears pool under his lashes as he watched, as if he hadn't cried all of yesterday and been supressing tears all day. God, he could cry rivers over him. He'd cry forever if he didn't have his hand to wipe them away.
He needed him.
His insides ached as he watched the performance play out, the boys backing him beautifully with their harmonies and adorable little two steps as Darren belted his heart out, tears of his own staining across his cheeks as he crossed the room, holding out his hands.
Kurt didn't hesitate.
Let me take you there
I wanna take you there
Let me take you there
Take you there
Take you there
Their fingers intertwined as Darren spun them around, pulling him close, singing into his ear.
Kurt never wanted to leave his arms.
I know a place we'll be together
And stay this young forever
They won't know who we are
He pulled away softly, but still held his hand. His eyes were bright and earnest as they bored into Kurt's and Kurt could hear his apology on his every note.
"Sing with me," he murmured, tugging him by the hand to join in the dance with the others.
As if he'd ever say no to him.
We can get away
To a better place
If you let me take you there
And their voices soared together as if they always had, tangling in discorded notes and rythms, a perfect mess of thick tears and lovely sounds. Darren squeezed his hand so tight Kurt thought it might go numb but he didn't care, it didn't matter.
In this moment, neither did anything else.
Or any one else.
It was just them.
We can go right now
Because every second counts
Boy, just let me take you there
Take you there
Always them.
As the song closed, their dream shattered as the commons exploded into thunderous applause. Kurt buried his face against Darren's chest, wanting to kiss him so bad but knowing they couldn't, not when there must be a teacher in the sea of students somewhere.
"Want to get away?" Darren murmured softly in his ear. Kurt let out a shuddering sigh, nodding eagerly.
They escaped the crowd eventually, after the Warblers buried Kurt in hugs and Darren had finished thanking them all. Kurt grabbed his bag and tugged Darren to his car, pressing him against it, rather enjoying the little gasp Darren made against his mouth as he leant up into him.
"So dad already thinks I'm staying late for Warblers practice…" he told him coyly. Darren smirked, catching on.
"And what do you suggest we do with that time?"
Kurt fingered with them hem of his hoodie, slipping his fingers just under it, pressing his cool fingers into the heat of his skin, feeling Darren shudder under his touch.
"I have a few ideas…"
They barely made it home before Kurt lost it.
As soon as they were in the front door, he pressed Darren's back against it, attacking his mouth with hot, hungry kisses that had him moaning as his hands tangled in his hair, his hips already bucking up. Kurt slotted their hips together, feeling himself quickly harden in his jeans as Darren kissed back enthusiastically, wrapping a thigh around his waist and tugging him harder against him.
Kurt ground his hips up hard, groaning as Darren slipped his lips down to mouth sloppily at his jaw, his hands rubbing desperately across his skin, tapping bursts of pleasure everywhere they moved. Kurt's hands tugged frantically at his shirt, cries of please and fuck and sorry and missed you falling between them.
The sound of a door slamming behind them broke the spell and they pulled apart quickly as Joey yelped, retreating back into his room, as quickly as he'd exited.
"Really, guys!" he yelled through the door.
Darren chuckled weakly, running a hand through his hair, trying to catch his breath as Kurt folded his arms angrily.
"You're fucking welcome, Joey!" Kurt snapped back. Darren rubbed a hand sympathetically across his back, kissing his cheek. Kurt sighed a little into his touch, leaning back into him.
"We should talk," he murmured quietly, tipping his head back as Darren stroked his cheek.
"We should," Darren agreed softly, ducking down to press a short kiss to his nose. Kurt scrunched his nose up adorably and pulled away with a small sigh, taking his hand and leading him to the bedroom.
They would work things out, Darren promised himself.
They had to.
Kurt was only a very little late home, but Burt still grumbled.
"You're late, Kurt," he said, frowning. He had stayed up waiting, sorting through mail at the dinner table. Kurt sighed a little, plopping down in the seat beside him.
"I'm sorry," he apologised honestly. And he was – he didn't want to make his dad worry.
Where he had been, however, he couldn't bring himself to be sorry for.
"Warblers practice run late?" Burt asked conversationally.
"I wasn't at Warbler practice," Kurt admitted quietly. Burt looked up suddenly.
"You lied to me?"
Kurt swallowed. "I was with Darren." Burt sighed, but Kurt interrupted before he could say anything. "We had a fight."
"I know," Burt said surlily, tossing a pamphlet into the junk mail pile. Kurt lifted an eyebrow in surprise. "Finn told me," Burt elaborated. "Said you were a mess when you came home on Sunday."
Kurt shifted until his arms were wrapped around himself completely. "Darren got a job offer," he explained. Burt didn't pause. "In LA."
That got his attention.
Burt bit his lip, looking like he was unsure of how to proceed. "I'd like to say about time," he said finally. "What does that kid even do again?"
"Acting, dad," Kurt said, a little sourly. Burt knew that. "He's an actor."
Burt nodded. "Right… so he got a job in LA… and he broke up with you?"
"Why do you assume that?" Kurt snapped. Burt gave him a look.
"Because you've been snapping at me since you sat down and Finn said you were, and I quote, hysterical yesterday." Burt sighed. "I'm just worried about you, kid."
"We didn't break up," Kurt said slowly, "but he didn't tell me… for a week. And I found out through his best friend and…" Kurt tapped his foot, not quite meeting his dad's eye as he fought for words, "I really thought it was going to be over."
"But… it's not?"
"No," Kurt said, a sudden smile tugging at his lips, "no, we talked about it and… I'm happy for him,' he said honestly. "I was upset he didn't tell me but I understand why. And I love him, and I want him to take the job."
"Do you think you guys'll be okay when he goes?" Burt asked, eyeing him seriously.
Kurt considered this for a moment before his smile finally spread.
"Yeah, dad," he said sincerely, "I think we'll make it."
And time passed, as it always did. Now that things with him and Darren were… not good, but better - he could let himself be excited for Regionals. He was working with the council to choose his solo and he was really happy with the song they decided on. The acappella arrangement was beautiful, too.
They might be able to win this thing.
Even better than that, Hunter had talked with the council and convinced them to arrange their opening number into a duet – with him and Kurt!
Kurt was so, so excited, and they were covering one of his favourite songs, too.
And Darren had promised he'd be there to watch.
He had been pretty busy lately with meetings and interviews and arrangements for his big move – after his discussion with Kurt he had finally accepted the job. The finality of the decision was pretty scary, but Kurt knew he was happy.
And that was enough.
"I don't want to alarm you," Kurt told Finn on the morning of the competition as they sat together at the breakfast table, "but I'm going to beat you."
"That's adorable, little dude," Finn grinned, mouth full of sugary cereal, "but we have a secret weapon."
"Your girlfriend doesn't count, big dude," Kurt sighed, rolling his eyes.
"What does Quinn have to do with anything?"
Kurt groaned. "I thought you were dating Rachel!"
Finn at least had the decency to blush.
Before he could say any more, Burt walked in then, grinning as he told the boys to hurry up as he had to take them to school. Kurt thought his enthusiasm was adorable, but he could also tell that he was secretly worried about the income. Neither of them had been known for being notoriously… humble winners when it came to brotherly competition.
Kurt thought it would be fine.
(Kurt was also sure he'd be on the winning team).
Kurt sat next to Hunter on the bus ride there, hardly able to sit still in his nervous excitement.
"You look excited," Hunter told him, biting back a laugh as he watched him buzz around in his seat.
"This is my first Warblers performance!" Kurt reminded him. "I'm excited to see what pre-show traditions you guys have lined up!"
"It's nothing special…" Hunter murmured only to be interrupted by Nick who peeked over his shoulder in the seat behind him.
"Au contraire, mon chere," Nick drawled, "but the Warbler traditions are not only special but also an integral celebration of the principles of which our group is based on, a tradition passed down from our forefathers-"
Kurt giggled at his pompous tone but Hunter only rolled his eyes.
"The worst part is," Hunter muttered, "he's actually reciting this from the Warbler Handbook. It's really just a bunch of pretentious bullshit."
"Basically," Jeff agreed, making Kurt jump with fright as he poked his head over his shoulder. "Usually we just play chubby bunnies until Thad throws up and sing along to Tarzan until Wes threatens to stop the bus."
"Our forefathers had swag," someone from behind them yelled. Kurt pressed his lips together, hiding his threatening grin as Hunter rolled his eyes again.
"Obnoxious," Kurt managed, unable to hold back his laugh at the look on Hunter's face.
Darren was just debating between two ties as he got ready for Kurt's performance when his phone buzzed in his pocket. Thinking it was him, he opened it with a smile and a soft hey, you.
"Would it kill you to check Caller ID?" Ava sighed. Darren mentally groaned.
"What can I do for you, Ava?" he asked tersely, opting for the blue one (it matched his eyes).
"Cut the crap, Criss," she snapped back. "Murphy's in town and you better not have plans because he wants to meet with you immediately."
Darren's heart sunk.
"But I do have plans!" he protested.
"Cancel them," Ava said shortly. "It's your future, Darren."
"I'll…" his words caught in his throat and he fought the sigh building deep in his chest, "I'll be there."
When they finally pulled into the lot of the venue, Kurt looked out the window with a large smile as he took in the new space. His heart hammered in his chest as he spotted another bus pulling up opposite them, and waited as a pile of familiar looking teenagers spilled out.
New Directions.
He was jittery with sudden nerves as the Warblers exited the bus, and he was quick to excuse himself from the group.
"Can I meet you guys in the green room?" he requested.
Wes followed the path of his eyes with a small smile.
"Of course, Warbler Kurt."
Darren barely had time to finish getting ready before Joey knocked at his door, looking concerned.
"You're going to be late if you don't hurry up," he told him. Darren bit his lip guiltily, busying himself with putting things back on hangers.
"Ava called," he said shortly, "there's a meeting with Ryan… I can't miss it."
Joey's face fell. "But… Regionals, man…"
"I know, I know," Darren said irritatedly, "do you actually think I want to go?"
"Tell them you already have plans!" Joey insisted. Darren shook his head.
"It just…" he sighed, "it doesn't work like that Joey."
Joey shrugged sadly. "I guess I wouldn't really know, would I?"
"Joey-"
"Have fun at your meeting, Dare," Joey said, not quite meeting Darren's eyes as he left, shutting the door with a gentle click behind him. Once out in the hall, he fished his phone from his pocket, quickly dialling a familiar number.
"Brian? Hey… you wouldn't be busy right now, would you?"
Kurt had to dart through the crowd quickly to reach them. He snuck up behind Rachel and tapped her shoulder carefully. She let out a little frightened squeal that quickly turned into an excited one as she turned, spotting him. at last.
"Kurt!' she shrieked, throwing her arms around him, hugging him tight against her. Kurt chuckled into her shoulder, squeezing her back. "It's so good to see you, oh my God!"
"It's good to see you, too," Kurt said, pulling back with a flustered laugh. He felt warmth spread in his chest and like a weight had been lifted. These people, he thought, turning around to his friends with a grin, letting himself be passed between arms and hugs and kisses; these people were his family.
It was like coming home.
(Even if he was only visiting).
They spent the next twenty minutes catching up before Hunter came and dragged Kurt back to the green room.
"It's time to warm up, superstar," he told him with a wink.
Kurt said his goodbyes and good lucks to his friends, feeling an overwhelming sudden draw of sadness, even as he promised to make plans for the following weeks.
God, he'd missed them.
Back in the green room Kurt joined them all with their vocal warm ups, feeling his nerves settle in as they moved side stage. They were preforming second.
Kurt bit his lip as he watched their performance unfold. They were… different, but they were good, there was no denying it –and the crowd and judges seemed to enjoy it.
The hummingbirds in his stomach only grew more frantic.
"Has anyone," Kurt asked worriedly, turning to Hunter as he heard the click of his shoes behind him, "ever died literally died onstage?"
Hunter gave him a smile caught between amused and fond.
"Kurt Hummel," he said slowly, coming to rest his hands on his shoulders comfortingly, "the only people who are going to die tonight, are the people in that audience, because you are going to fucking kill this shit." He shook his head, biting back a slightly giddy laugh, turning back with a softer smile. "You are the best thing to ever happen to the Warblers."
Kurt blinked back slowly, a little aweful in the wake of Hunter's comment. Hunter's hands fell from his shoulders after a moment, his smile sweet as he stepped back, huffing out a nervous breath as the call for the Warblers sounded from across the stage and the last of the performers scurried off stage.
"You ready?" Wes said from behind him, patting his back with a comforting smile. Kurt attempted to shoot one back, and nodded, even though he wasn't so sure. Wes just grinned.
"Go get 'em tiger."
As the lights dimmed on stage and the curtain began to rise, Kurt took a hesitant step out, swallowing the nerves that threatened at the base of his throat. The opening bars dwindled out and he took a deep, steadying breath.
He could do this.
Now and then I think of when we were together
Like when you said you felt so happy you could die
As he sang he let himself look past the beam of lights out into the crowd. He spotted New Directions in the middle of the crowd, and Rachel's beaming face, waving excitedly. He fought a smile as Hunter's voice sounding from the opposite side of the stage tugged him back.
So when we found out we could not make sense
Well you said that we could still be friends
But I'll admit that I was glad that it was over
Hunter's eyes were deep and compelling as they ran over him, his legs carrying him slowly across the stage to stand beside him. His voice was deep and rich and lovely as it caressed the air between them and Kurt felt a shiver rock through him.
Right on cue, Kurt broke away slightly, edging back towards the crowd, searching once more. The large number of people staring back at him made his stomach turn a little and his eyes darted about restlessly, seeking out the one person who could bring him comfort right now.
He couldn't find him.
But you didn't have to cut me off
Darren wasn't here.
Make out like it never happened and that we were nothing
But he promised he would be.
And I don't even need your love
God, he needed him here.
But you treat me like a stranger and that feels so rough
Hunter caught his eye across the room as they paced and turned, their voices flowing in harmony as they sang, the lyrics never seeming so earnest.
You didn't have to stoop so low
Have your friends collect your records and then change your number
I guess that I don't need that though
Now you're just somebody that I used to know
As soon as both songs were over, Kurt was straight out of there. He didn't have the heart to stay and watch the New Directions performance, and quickly excused himself, dashing straight out of the theatre to get some fresh air.
The wind was bracing as he leant against the wall of the theatre, trying to catch his breath, smudges of suppressed tears blurring against his eyes. His heart hammered in his chest as his mind ran over the possibilities. There was a chance that he was actually here, but Kurt knew deep down that his hope was in vain.
He hadn't come.
He checked his phone for messages to no avail – and god, that's what hurt the most. He hadn't even called.
So had he forgotten? Had he already forgotten him?
No, Kurt didn't think so. Not when he'd texted his love (and other things) just early this morning.
It didn't make any sense.
He tucked his hands deep into the pockets of his blazer as another wave of icy wind shot through the air. He let his eyes drift shut as he tried to block out the horrible thoughts circulating his mind.
What if something had happened to him?
What if Darren was hurt?
He fished his phone out again and nervously dialled his mobile number but there was only a tense wait before it rang out. Kurt tried to dial again with a huff but a voice from behind him stopped him.
"He's not going to answer."
It was Joey.
Kurt started at the sound of his voice, whirling around to meet him, his eyes growing wide as he took in the group standing behind him. Joey, Brian, Joe, Dylan, Jaime, Meredith, Lauren, AJ, Ally, Julia – even Charlene.
They were all here.
"You did so well, honey," Charlene said softly, stepping forward with her arms extended. Kurt stepped into them numbly, his whole body cold and quiet as Joey's words rang in his ear.
He's not going to answer.
"We're so proud of you," Ali's voice sounded from behind, in her usual sweet and girlish tones.
"You sounded amazing, kid," Dylan enthused.
"Fucking amazing," Joe added helpfully.
"And we're sorry Darren couldn't be here," Brian said sadly, holding out his arms as Charlene slowly let him go. Kurt hugged him too, mumbling into his shoulder.
"Where is he?"
"Emergency meeting with RM," Joey explained. "He's really sorry, Kurt."
Kurt swallowed, nodding as he stepped back from Brian's arms.
He was okay, that was the main thing.
"It's okay," he said, smiling weakly. "I-how did you guys…" he let out a huff of an incredulous laugh as the facts registered in his mind.
All these people – these wonderful, talented people.
They were here for him.
"What are you guys doing here?"
"You're a part of our family, Kurt," Lauren said, slinging an arm around his shoulders. "We take care of our own."
"When Dare said he couldn't make it, I decided to call up these guys to see if we could be his substitute," Joey elaborated.
"Just don't expect any congratulatory kisses," Brian teased.
"Actually-"
"Shut it, AJ."
Kurt muffled a wet giggle, nudging into Laurent's shoulder. "Thank you, guys," he said sincerely. "It means so much having you here."
"Awwww!"
And as the group moved in on him, smothering him in a mess of arms and kisses and musical laughter, Kurt felt the ache in his chest numb somewhat.
It was going to be so hard when Darren left. He was the rock, the light, the best thing in his life – but without him, he wouldn't be alone.
He would always have these losers.