Unable to think of any place to go right offhand, I Apparated in Diagon Alley, right outside my clinic. I felt like crying, but I forced the thought out of my mind, at least temporarily. For now, I focused on finding a place to stay. I could stay at the clinic- but that would mean being alone with my thoughts. Not the best idea- and there was a slight insect problem I hadn't gotten under control yet.

My next through was headquarters, but the Order had vacated the house after Sirius' death, unsure if it was still safe. Pity- there had always been extra rooms there and Sirius would have liked the company.

I could find Lupin…but his wasn't the sort of company I wanted now. I needed a friend…someone who understood what I was going through…

The answer hit me like a brick and I mentally slapped myself for not thinking of her sooner. Tonks had an apartment in London- I had visited her a few times. She'd been quite depressed recently- having professed her love to Lupin, he had denied her.

I knocked on Tonks' apartment door. She opened it a moment later, leaving the chain locked. A single brown eye peered out the crack of the door and the tip of her wand.

"Olivia… I'm supposed to ask you a security question, otherwise how do I know you're you?"

"I am Olivia… I come because…because Severus Snape has broken my heart and you are only person who knows about us…though I suppose now there is no us."

With that said I burst into tears. Tonks opened the door and pulled me into a hug.

"Olivia, I'm so sorry…what happened?"

She shut the door and led me over to the couch, which was bright purple. I wiped my eyes, willing myself to quit crying. I told her what happened, all the while looking around me so as not to start crying again.

Tonks' apartment was a one-bedroom apartment, but it was rather exciting. The walls were bright blue, the couch bright fuchsia. She had a Muggle television set- her Dad was a Muggle. The place was untidy- cups and plates were on the coffee tables, there was trash and empty pizza boxes on the floor- and although I wasn't a particularly messy person, I didn't mind.

"What an asshole," Tonks said when I finished talking. I automatically opened my mouth to defend him, then closed it.

"You're welcome to stay as long as you like, but I'm afraid I'm not very cheerful company," she said.

"I don't want cheerful company. …We've both had our hearts broken."

She was silent a moment, staring blankly at the TV screen.

"You know what we need?" she said finally.

"What?"

"Pizza and beer."

She went into her kitchen and reappeared a moment later with a case of beer and a phone. She handed me a beer, then called and ordered us a pizza.

While we were waiting on the pizza, Tonks flipped through the channels on the television. Not being used to such things, it sort of gave me a headache, seeing all the rapid colors and movement…but the beer helped.

The pizza came and we stayed up late, drinking and eating and watching some slasher horror movie. She told me she had been having trouble with her Metamorphing since Lupin turned her down. Try as she might, she couldn't change her hair from the lanky brown nor her eyes from the deep, sad brown they had assumed. By the time the movie was over I was nodding off. It had been a long day and I was still exhausted. And my throat and lungs still hurt from smoke inhalation. I thought about mixing a simple potion to help, then remembered that all of my stuff was at Spinner's End. I hadn't even grabbed any clothes.

Tonks brought me a pillow and blankets from her room so I could sleep on the couch.

"Goodnight Liv," she said, going towards her room.

"Night," I said, stretching out on the couch. I was asleep almost as soon as my head hit the pillow.

Snape's POV

I was an idiot.

Why is it I can never say or do the right thing? I thought as I lay, tossing and turning, alone in my bed. I hadn't wanted to her to leave- I still couldn't believe she was gone.

I loved her. I missed her. I had just been upset, after having been reprimanded by both Albus and the Dark Lord. I hadn't meant for her to leave.

I couldn't sleep. Not alone. Not without her in my bed. I never realized how much I would miss her small warm body next to mine. I had taken it for granted over the last year and a half.

The Dark Lord had been mad- not furious, but mad. He requested an explanation and I told him the truth. How she had been attacked by dementors and had followed the sound of screams to where her mother's bookstore was on fire. He had sneered and called her foolish. She should have known better than to go out alone and night and to try and fight a fire alone. I defended her without even thinking and had received a quick slap to the face for my troubles.

I tossed and turned in my bed for a little over an hour before getting up. I made my way to Olivia's room and crawled into her empty bed. I buried my face in her pillow and inhaled deeply. My heart ached for her. Before falling asleep, I decided that tomorrow I would go and look for her.

Olivia's POV

That night I dreamed about Snape. I dreamt he had been killed by the Dark Lord. Lucius Malfoy had brought his body to me, all the while sneering and trying to flirt with me. I'd dreamt his funeral and when they put his body in the ground I was standing near the edge and fell into the hole. I fell down and down through the darkness and became wrapped in what I soon realized were the shrouds a body would be wrapped in.

I woke myself with a scream. Tonks came running into the room where she found me crying and thrashing about, tangled up in the sheets. She helped me sit up and get untangled.

"B-bad dream," I said, shaking. Without saying anything she led me into her room.

"You can sleep in here- but I warn you, I tend to move around a lot in my sleep," she said.

We crawled into bed and while she went back to sleep almost immediately, it took me a little longer, fearing that I might slip into the dream again.

When I finally did get to sleep, I was dimly aware of Tonks moving around beside me, though a part of me thought it was Snape. To still him, I moved and snuggled up. Tonks did not wake, but stopped moving and we both fell into a deep, peaceful sleep.

I awoke the next morning warm and snuggled up with someone I assumed to be Snape. Slowly I realized that the person my arm was around- and whose arms were around me- was much too petite to be Snape. I opened my eyes and everything came flooding back to me. Tonks opened her eyes, momentarily confused- then she grinned at me. She sat up and stretched.

"I think I slept better than I have in weeks," she said with a yawn. I chuckled weakly.

Tonks was wearing nothing but shorts and a tanktop and when she stretched, I noticed a tattoo on her left shoulder. It was of a black and blue butterfly.

"What's with the tattoo?" I inquired.

"Hm? Oh, I got that when I was a teenager. I can even hide it with my Metamorphising…if I could do it right."

"That's pretty cool," I remarked.

"Yeah. Hurt like hell though."

We got up and went into the living room to eat breakfast, which consisted of cold pizza and orange juice.

"I guess I'm going to have to go and get some of my stuff today- clothes, potions ingredients…you know, the essentials…" I said to which Tonks rolled her eyes and smiled slightly.

"I can go with you, but it will have to wait until this afternoon. I have an assignment this morning. We can go after lunch. You can stay here, or go work on your shop until I get back."

"Okay," I said with a slow nod.

That is how I found myself wandering Diagon Alley for most of the morning. I was half-heartedly looking for some sort of bug spray for the clinic, but mostly I was just avoiding going there. I was worried that, for whatever reason, Snape would come looking for me…and I just wasn't ready to face him alone.

Close to lunchtime I found a good insect repellent and finally went to the clinic. I cleaned up a bit so it would look like I had done something today and sprayed the bug spray. I nearly had a heart attack when someone knocked on the door but was relieved to find it was only Tonks.

"Are you ready?" she asked me.

"No. But let's get it over with."

I locked up shop, took Tonks' hand, and we Disapparated.

We appeared in my room at Spinner's End. I quickly scanned the house with Legilimency and breathed a sigh of relief.

"He isn't here," I said.

"How do you know?" Tonks asked.

"Legilimency."

"Aha. I never could get the hang of that or Occlumency. So you could read my mind?"

"If I wanted to. I generally don't, but Severus and I have-…had, I guess- a special connection. We just sort of click…it's always easy for me to slip into his mind."

I was silent a moment, then shook my head and began to fill a bag with clothes. I looked at my bed for a moment- it looked almost as if someone had slept in it since I last made it. Then Tonks flopped down on my bed to wait while I packed.

I walked across the hall to Snape's room to gather anything I might have left in there, leaving Tonks on my bed, flipping through some books. I picked up most of my clothes off his floor. Then, on a strange impulse, I stole one of his black cloaks and shoved it in my bag quickly.

"What's up with this?" Tonks asked warily when I re-entered the room. She held my copy of A Guide to the Dark Arts.

"Severus was training me…in case the Dark Lord ever asked for me. To give me an idea of what I'd be working with. …Dumbledore approved it," I explained quickly. "He taught me some good defensive spells as well."

"What happens if He asks for you now?" Tonks asked.

"No idea. I'll let Snape figure that one out. Come on, let's go- I've got everything I want, for now."

Snape's POV

I spent most of the day looking for Olivia. I checked the clinic in Diagon Alley, the Leaky Cauldron, Headquarters- even though we'd all been told to evacuate- but I couldn't find her anywhere. I'd even checked Hogwarts, which had led to Albus asking probing questions.

"We just argued, that's all, and now I can't find her. Are you sure you haven't heard anything?" I asked somewhat desperately.

"I'm afraid not…but I'll keep my ears open…and I'll ask around. Olivia knows things and should her knowledge fall into the wrong hands, it could be disastrous."

I didn't tell him that I was more worried about Olivia herself than the knowledge she held.

I thought about checking with Lupin…but that was a conversation I didn't want to have, especially if she was there.

I went home that night feeling worse than before. She obviously didn't want to be found. Either that or she was being held somewhere against her will…

This is just great, I thought miserably. Now I'm just all the more worried about her. Better to keep her close than to not know where she is.

When I went upstairs to go to bed, I noticed the door to her room was ajar. I knew I had shut it before I left. Feeling slightly hopeful, I entered her room, only to be met with crushing disappointment. Most of her stuff was gone. Heart heavy, I sat down on her bed. At least I knew that she was okay…but that meant she was purposely hiding from me.

Olivia's POV

I'd been staying at Tonks' place for about a week. Each night I slept in her bed. We were a small comfort to each other during those times.

Whenever I was alone during the day, I wandered the streets of London. I avoided Diagon Alley and my clinic, anywhere I might run into Snape. I stuck to the Muggle side of London. I had been mulling something over in my head the past week and it wasn't entirely planned out when one day after a lunch alone in London, I entered a Muggle tattoo parlor.

I emerged about an hour later, limping slightly but grinning through my pain. When Tonks got home that evening, I peeled the bandage off my ankle and proudly showed her my tattoo.

"That's awesome! But you never really struck me as the flower type," she commented.

"It's not just a flower. It's a lily…a Belladonna lily, which is a form of deadly nightshade," I said with a grin.

"Aha. You know you could dab a bit of healing paste on that so it won't peel?"

"Nah. The pain is all part of the experience."

A few days later, I was home alone, watching TV, when there was a knock at the door. I leapt to my feet, thinking that Snape had somehow found me. My first instinct was to run and hide in the bedroom, preferably under the bed. On the off chance that it was not him, however, I grabbed my wand and peered through the peephole…into the smiling face of Albus Dumbledore.

"Hello Olivia. May I come in?" he asked pleasantly. I opened the door a crack.

"Er, well… It's not my house, you see-"

"I'm sure Tonks won't mind."

"-And how am I to know you are truly Albus Dumbledore?"

"I doubt any Death Eater would dare impersonate me, however, you may ask me a security question, just to be on the safe side."

I thought a moment.

"…What was my biological mother's name?" I asked him.

"Lynn Rahl," he answered. I opened the door and let him in.

I looked around rather sheepishly at the room as he sat on the couch.

"Sorry about the mess, sir. We've been…" but I was unsure of how to finish the sentence, so I let it hang.

"It's quite alright," he said with a slight chuckle. "…I wonder, Olivia, if you have spoken with Severus recently?"

"No, sir," I said somewhat stiffly.

"I thought not. He is quite worried about you. He cares for you an awful lot."

"He's got a funny way of showing it," I mumbled.

"Well he is, after all, Severus."

He had a point there. I said nothing.

"I know," he continued. "that I cannot force you to forgive him, whatever injustice it is he has done. But I think it would be better for the both of you. …If not, I offer you the use of a safe house. The Order has several of them available. I can't help but worry that someone may come after you. You possess knowledge of the Order and knowledge of Severus that, if in the wrong hands, could be fatal…"

I considered his words carefully and sighed.

"I will let you know what I decide," I said quietly.

"Excellent," he said, standing. "Also…you know he has been looking for you?"

"Yes sir."

He nodded.

"I trust you will choose the right path," he said and Disapparated with a pop.

When Dumbledore left, I sat back down and turned the TV on, though I wasn't really watching. I was pondering my decision, though I already knew what I was going to do.

I went down to the clinic to work. I had been there a little over an hour when the door opened and Snape walked in.

He looked surprised to see me standing behind the counter. I imagined he had been by several times looking for me.

"Olivia…" he breathed in disbelief.

I said nothing, merely continued my sweeping.

"Are you still mad at me?" he asked, cautiously approaching me.

"Well… I'm waiting on an apology," I said coolly.

"I'm sorry," he said immediately. "Of course I'm sorry. I love you. I miss you. I've spent every spare moment looking for you. I'm an idiot. I let love slip through my fingers once already and… I want you to come home."

I smiled in spite of myself.

"Well, when you put it that way…" I said. "Of course I will come home."

He laughed weakly and embraced me. He kissed my forehead, my nose, my mouth. He held onto my for the longest time, as if afraid I would disappear if he let me go.

"Let's go home," I murmured.

Author's Note: There, isn't it all well and good now? By the way, I actually have a Belladonna Lily tattoo on my left ankle, I got it for my 18th birthday and it's bitchin' awesome. Heehee. Don't forget to review, folks, and I'll be back soon with an update!

~LilReporterGirl