This might be M-ish for violence
Steve finished his run around Central Park and started to head back the Stark Tower. Dinner with Maria had been alright. It was all work related, but it was better than nothing. Maybe next time he asked her he would stress that it wasn't for work. God Bucky is going to give me so much crap, thought Steve. He got back to the Tower and was about to take a shower when his phone rang. The caller I.D showed it was Becca.
"Good morning Bee," said Steve and Becca let out a snort.
"And here I thought no one was ever going to call me that again," said Becca.
"I can't help it," said Steve. It was a small holdover from childhood; she was the little bee that followed him and Bucky.
"Have you heard from Bucky and Alison?" asked Becca and she sounded worried.
"Not since they left last night," said Steve.
"I'm probably being silly, but they were supposed to be here an hour ago for breakfast. I can accept Bucky being late, but Alison always calls when she might be late," said Becca. Steve felt something settle hard in the pit of his stomach. Bucky might always be running a bit behind, but he wouldn't make Becca wait and not call her. Plus Alison was one who liked to be somewhere fifteen minutes early. She wouldn't be late and not call ahead.
"I tried calling her cell, but no one picked up," said Becca.
"Give me a bit and I'll go over and shake them out of bed," said Steve trying to joke before ending the call. There was no reason they would stand Becca up. Or maybe they both overslept and Alison forgot to set her alarm and her phone died, thought Steve even though it didn't sit right with him. Steve skipped the shower and drove over to Brooklyn. He called Alison and neither one picked up. That worry in his stomach increased when he saw Alison's car still in the parking garage.
Steve went up to the apartment and found the door wasn't shut all the way. Steve eased the door open and saw the small end table had been kicked over and Alison's purse was on the floor with the contents all over the place. Her phone alarm was buzzing and Steve shut if off without thinking before calling Natasha.
"Someone took Bucky and Alison," said Steve trying to fight the panic. Panic was quickly fading to rage though. It was a blitz attack. They clearly took Bucky out first or else the mess would have been greater, thought Steve looking around. Unless they used Alison has leverage against him. Or they used them as leverage against each other. Alison wouldn't want them to hurt Bucky and Bucky wouldn't want her hurt either, thought Steve.
"I'll get Sam and David and we'll meet you at the Tower," said Natasha ending the call. Steve wanted to scream has he left the apartment. Why did I think Hydra was done with him? I thought he was safe with us now. I wanted his life to be normal again. They took Alison too. They tortured Bucky into what he was. What are they going to do to her? That thought chilled Steve to the bone as he drove back to the Tower.
…..
Alison nearly fell down the last flight of steps that lead to a basement level. She was in a warehouse or factory of some sort and if her situation wasn't so horrifying she would have laughed at the horror movie trope of it. Woman running for her life in a creepy warehouse while being chased by a bunch of psychos. Alison put her arm up to her nose to try to stop the bleeding and ran down the hall. Don't leave any more of a trail, she thought.She found a door that wasn't locked and threw herself into the room and locked the door quickly. It was a large workshop area with lots of places to hide. She scrambled for the nearest table that gave her some cover.
Her nose was broken and it was hard to breath, not to mention she really couldn't see out of her left eye since it was swollen shut. Good thing he punch you with his right hand. Had he done it with his left you might be dead, thought Alison and she shuddered. That wasn't her Bucky, but when he came back to himself and saw what he had done he was going to be sick. Bastards, thought Alison trying to breathe through her mouth and not cough. They were going to make him hurt her until they got bored and then they would make him kill her. He would never forgive himself if I died while he wasn't in control. I won't let them, thought Alison.
Alison felt numb when it dawned on her what she would have to do to get her and Bucky out of this. She was going to have to kill them before they could give Bucky anymore orders. She hoped their version of the Lullaby would bring Bucky out of it, but in order to get to Bucky she had to get rid of them. They want me dead...they'll use him to do it. I don't have a choice. I don't know where we are or if anyone knows we're missing yet. Even if they know how are they going to find us?
Alison took her coat off and left it as a decoy and went deeper into the room to find a weapon. She heard someone calling down the hall. "Run Rabbit-Run Rabbit-Run! Run! Run!" She picked up a screw driver and slipped a box cutter into her back pocket before hiding behind another workstation as the door was kicked in.
"Oh little rabbit...come on out. I promise I won't let him play too rough with you. Maybe you and I can just play huh?" he called out. He kicked over a stack of boxes and Alison bit her tongue to keep from crying out. Her hands were damp and she could feel her whole body shaking as she listened to him get closer and he called out taunts on what they could do if she just came out and played nice.
"I promise to be real sweet with you. You looked really pretty when you were sleeping. Neil wanted to play with you then and I wouldn't let him. It's no fun when they're passed out. I like my girls lively...you got a lot of spunk in you sweetheart. Your boy can go for hours can't he? He knew how to behave when we told him too. I'll make him do whatever you like," called the man.
Alison waited until she saw his shoes and she came out and shoved the screw driver right into the jugular vein. She jammed it in as deep as she could and ran away as he fired a shot and missed her by inch. She heard him try to scream and a thud has he fell to the ground. If he tried to pull it out he killed himself quicker, thought Alison scrambling into another hiding place as another pair of footsteps came into the room. One down and four to go.
"You fucking bitch," called a voice. "Neil...she killed Alec. Yes! The cunt stabbed him in the neck is how. No. I'm gonna clean her clock when I find her. I'm in the basement. If you want her alive or a least breathing I suggest you and your toy get down here!" Alison picked up a pipe and listened as the other man went slamming around the shop. Your opponent thinks you're weak and he'll underestimate you. Let that be in your favor. Natasha had told her that and now she was going to use it to her favor. Her opponent was pissed and not really expecting her to come out in front of him and club him in the face.
"You bitch," he spat and he went to rush her when Alison ducked down and slammed the pipe into his kneecaps crushing them and knocking him to the ground with a kick to groin. This was the man who had grabbed her throat last night and tried to choke her. He tried to get up and Alison kept hitting until she heard the crack of his skull. She looked to see his skull was now caved in and he wasn't breathing. She dropped the pipe and fought the urge to throw up. Alison took his gun with shaking hands and made sure the safety was off before running away. Two down...three to go.
….
Natasha realized she was going to have to be the rational one here because Steve and Sam were barely keeping it together and David seemed stunned by what was going on. Then again she knew the fear they felt and couldn't blame them. When Clint had been taken by Loki it was all she could do to keep it together. On the outside she knew she appeared to be an ice queen, but inside she was terrified of what was happening to her friend.
"They could be anywhere and we don't even know where to start," said Sam. Natasha pulled up the security camera footage she could find and had narrowed down one unmarked black van leaving the area around ten last night.
"I had Friday track the van all the way to Jersey. It was heading for an airstrip there," said Natasha. Steve shook his head as Natasha went on. "A plane was booked and they manifest has it heading to D.C, but no plane matching that description landed in D.C.," said Natasha.
"So we have nothing," said Steve pacing and Sam got a look in his eyes.
"They would have to refuel if they wanted to take it out of the country," said Sam.
"Well that narrows it a bit. Still they could have landed and driven them anywhere," said Steve and Natasha went over to him.
"We're going to find them and we'll take care of the damage when we find them. Right now we need to think. Friday," called Natasha. "Can you see if any airport has a plane matching the description of the one that left New Jersey last night?" asked Natasha.
"The plane landed in Honduras, but another plane was stolen and hadn't been located yet. The black box has been disabled," said Friday and Sam sat down grim.
"So from Honduras they could have gone anywhere in Central or in South America. Or they're in Honduras. Or the plane was trick and they're still here in the States and...I can't think," said Sam and he left the room quickly.
"I'll go talk to him," said David leaving the room Steve looked after them and shook his head.
"I'm not giving up on finding them, but they have a twelve hour head start on us. We don't have a way to track them and they could be anywhere and having god knows what done to them and…" Natasha cut him off.
"Don't think about what could be happening to them or you won't be able to help them. I know how much Bucky means to you and how much Alison means to Sam. They're my friends too and god help the people who took them because I'm going to kill them slowly," said Natasha.
"I just wish we had a way to track them," said Steve when Friday chimed in.
"Mr. Stark is on the line and he might be of assistance," said Friday.
"Patch him in," said Steve and Tony appeared on the screen and he looked annoyed.
"So the Flying Monkeys have Dorothy and the Tin Man?" asked Tony and Natasha rolled her eyes as Steve counted to ten in his head.
"Not now," said Steve and Sam and David came back to join them.
"Tell me he has good news," said Sam and Tony nodded.
"Back when I was fixing Barnes's arm I noticed a GPS chip was missing. He had enough sense in his head to locate it and take it out before going on the lamb. So when I was fixing it I put a new one in," said Tony and Steve looked torn between annoyance and relief.
"So where are they?" asked Steve and Tony grimaced.
"Well I figured you would be a little pissed at me for putting it in so I set it up to be active when it's taken out. So it may not lead us to them, but it's something to work from," said Tony quickly when he noticed Sam was about to lose it.
"Tell me they took it out," said Steve through clenched teeth. Tony typed in something on his phone and grinned.
"They took it out. I'm sending you the location now," said Tony and a second later Steve's phone pinged.
"Venezuela," said Steve and he headed for the Quinjet with Sam on his heels.
"Thanks," said Natasha before ending the call with Tony. She changed into her uniform and made her way to the jet. Sam was sitting behind Steve and Natasha took a seat in the back with David.
"You know you might have to get in line to kill whoever took them," said David eyeing Sam who sat ridge in his seat and Steve who was flying the jet and looked ready to break something. Natasha had only seen Steve in a rage a handful and it never ended well for the people on the other end.
"I'll wait my turn," said Natasha.
…..
It was an old run down factory of some sort and Natasha and David started in the basement while Steve and Sam worked the upstairs levels. Natasha spotted the kicked in door and tightened her grip on the gun as she listened for any sound.
"No," muttered David and he picked up a light grey coat that had blood on the front and on the sleeve.
"Just keep looking," whispered Natasha. She wanted them or us to find it, thought Natasha as she went down the aisle. She spotted the body and when she saw it was male and not Bucky she almost let out a sigh of relief. She turned him over and noticed he had a blood covered screw driver next to him. David frowned looking at the man.
"He bled out when he was stabbed. He pulled it out and made it go it a little faster," said David and Natasha shook her head. The next body was further in and looked like his head had been beaten in and a pipe with a bloody handprint was on it. It was too small to be Barnes's handprint and Natasha sighed.
"They didn't leave her a choice," said Natasha.
"You think Ally did this?" asked David. "She holds her own in self-defense class, but this is...damn them," said David as he gave it real thought.
"They had her cornered and she fought back as hard as she could. They clearly didn't think she had it in her," said Natasha. Her comm buzzed and it was Steve telling her to come upstairs. By the sound of it things were bad up there too.
…
Alison crept back up the stairs and her chest burned from trying not to cough. She could hear them on the upper levels. She had found another door in the basement room and it went back upstairs. Someone was coming to take Bucky and if she didn't get them out of here before they came she was going to lose Bucky. She wiped her hands on her jeans and frowned when she realized how bloody her hands were. Is it mine or theirs, thought Alison. She bit back a sob and a cough. She had to get Bucky and somehow call for help. Her head was pounding as she made it back up to the floor where they had wiped Bucky. She heard two of them in the room gathering things and joking.
"Neil and the Asset went to find her. I'm not surprised she got Alec. He was always a cocky piece of shit," said one man in Spanish. His partner laughed and put something in a box.
"It's a shame we couldn't join in. She has really pretty eyes," he said.
Alison took a second to get her hands to stop shaking and adjusted her aim since her one eye was swollen shut. She hit the first man through the shoulder and when he turned around she got him in the chest twice before he fell over. The second man rushed her before she could fire the next round and he knocked her down and tried taking the gun from her. She pulled the trigger and it went off and she could feel the blood soaking her shirt. She pulled the trigger three more times before he stopped moving. Alison pushed him off her and threw up her dinner. She was used to seeing people hurt, people near death and more than once she had seen someone die. She never thought she would be the cause of death. Alison forced herself up and swayed on her feet and she dropped the gun. She was burning up and it was getting harder to focus. She gave into a coughing fit that doubled her over. Just find Bucky and this will be over, thought Alison. She turned to leave when she saw Bucky and the man called Neil standing in the doorway and Neil was smirking.
"Well you are a tricky one," said Neil. He nodded at Bucky and Bucky rushed at her. Alison staggered to get the gun when Bucky knocked her and pinned her. He wrapped his right hand around her throat and started to choke her.
"Bucky…" she could see spots. "Sergeant...Winter is over," whispered Alison and she weakly tapped his wrist. He tapped her wrist and looked puzzled.
"That's enough," said Neil and Bucky got off her. Alison went to reach for the gun when Neil kicked it away. She tried to get the box cutter out of her pocket and realized it had fallen out of her pocket when she had been knocked down the first time.
"I think you've done enough damage for one day," he said before kicking her hard in the side. Alison let out a strangled cry of pain and she tried to crawl away when Neil pinned her down. Alison tried to get him off her when he slammed her head into the floor and she saw spots again.
"Now. You're going to behave or he's going to make you behave," said Neil. Alison felt him running his hands under her shirt and cupping her breasts hard.
"Please...don't," pleaded Alison and she looked over to Bucky who seemed to be dazed. "Please." Neil grabbed her face and made her look at him.
"He can't help you and he's not going too. It's just us," hissed Neil. Alison felt herself go numb as he kissed her and pressed his erection against her
"Let's see if you're better than he was," he said. He went to undo her pants when Alison heard a strangled cry and felt the weight lift off her body. Through the haze she saw Bucky slam Neil to the ground and his left fist slammed into Neil's face. She was sure the second blow killed him, but Bucky just kept hitting him and Alison carefully touched him.
"Bucky," said Alison and he whirled around with his fist raised and a look of madness in his eyes. He jerked back when he saw it was her, he looked confused and sad.
"I know you...I don't know how," he said softly. Alison fought the urge to cry. She didn't know how much of his memory had been damaged during his shock treatment and she didn't want scare him. He did remember her a little, enough to recall their Lullaby and to save her.
"We're friends. We have to get out of here and…" Alison moved too fast and the world spun around her. Bucky caught her and she finally blacked out.
…..
"I don't think she did that," said Sam pointing at the body that no longer had a face. Actually he barely had a head left and Natasha agreed even as Steve looked sick seeing the chair that wiped Bucky. Natasha filled them in on what they found downstairs and her theory about what happened.
"Maybe she got away or they decided to have a little fun, but she wasn't going to leave Bucky behind. She didn't have a choice Sam," said Natasha softly, but firmly.
"That doesn't explain where they are now," said Sam.
"Alison would have tried to contact us if she could by now," said David and when Sam glared at him David went on quickly. "She could just be hurt and can't reach out right now," said David. Natasha looked at Steve who was still glaring at the chair.
"If Alison is hurt and Bucky is in some sort of Winter Soldier mindset than we have a huge problem," said Natasha.
"Bigger than what we have right now?" spat Steve.
"If he feels threatened he's going to go back to being a ghost. If Alison is really hurt and he can't take her with him...he might eliminate her," said Natasha. Steve went over to the chair and started tearing it apart with his bare hands.
…
He knew her. Somehow he knew her and he couldn't let her be hurt anymore. She called me Bucky...my name is Bucky. Bucky Barnes. Something in him snapped when it dawned on him what was going to happen to her. They had hurt him in the same way and he wasn't going to let it happened to her. She seemed stunned and worried about him before she fainted in his arms.
She was right about getting out of here though and he carried out of the building and carefully laid her in the back of the van. She moaned and let out a cough that shook her body and made her wince even though she was passed out. She might have broken ribs when he kicked her. We'll wrap them once I'm sure it's safe, thought Bucky. He took in her injuries and frowned. Her eye was swollen shut and he was sure her nose was broken based on her breathing. Her neck already had marks on it and he frowned thinking about how he had come too with his own hand on her neck. It was the fever and the cough that bothered him. She was sick and it pulled at something in his mind. Steve had the flu and he complained about being cold even when he was burning up.
He checked the van for a tracking device and didn't find any. It took a bit too hot wire the van and she let out a whimper from the back.
"Please don't," she muttered before drifting back out.
"How do I know you?" muttered Bucky driving away. She would sometimes mutter or whimper from the back, but she stayed asleep the whole time. They were near Maracaibo and he was sure there was somewhere they could stay and hide until she was better. What if she doesn't get better? Bucky shoved the thought away and parked the van in a lot once night came. He looked around the van and found the box that handlers kept money in and took a couple hundred in Bolivar and shoved it in his pocket. They would need somewhere to stay and lay low. He also found a Glock and he carefully put it in his pocket.
"Hey. Hey. Wake up," said Bucky and he shook her hard. She woke with a start and then her face softened when she saw it was him.
"Did you call Steve?" she asked groggily. Did she mean his Steve? Steve Rogers? Why would he help me?
"Not yet. We need a secure location first. I'm going to find one and I'll come back for you," said Bucky and she frowned.
"Don't go," she said. Bucky took in her appearance and frowned. She was covered in blood and badly bruised. She's going to attract attention and we don't need that, thought Bucky.
"You look horrible and I can't take you with me right now. I'll come back for you in a bit," said Bucky. She went to get up and he forced her back down.
"I'll come back for you. Just wait here," said Bucky. She looked tired and worried as she laid back down.
"Be careful," she said hoarsely before she drifted off again. Bucky left the van and locked it. Just leave her to die and Bucky was horrified at the thought. She wouldn't leave me. I don't know how I know that, but I know she wouldn't leave me to die. She killed those Hydra agents for me. Why?
"What's her name?" muttered Bucky. They were in a rather empty part of town and he spotted a small rundown apartment building. He went in and spotted the landlord watching a game.
"I want to rent an apartment," said Bucky in Spanish and the landlord eyed him.
"Laborer?" he asked and Bucky shrugged.
"Looking for work," said Bucky. The landlord shrugged and gave Bucky the weekly rate and Bucky gave him the money and the man tossed him the keys.
"Third floor, Number two. Water and lights work and there is a bed with sheets and some towels," said the landlord before turning back to the TV. Bucky took the keys and left. He picked up a pair of pants and a hooded sweatshirt at a corner booth before heading back to the van. He woke her up again and handed her the clothes. She quickly stripped her bloody clothes off and he spotted two bruises forming near her ribs. She pulled the hoodie over her face and he had to help her down the street to the apartment. The landlord didn't notice them as they went upstairs to the apartment.
"My head," she muttered slumping over the second the door was shut. He carried her over to the bed and brushed her hair back from her face. She was burning up and her cough made her wince. He found the towels and he ran a hand towel under some cold water. Bucky sat down on the bed and scrubbed the blood off her face and her hands. She was probably a very pretty woman when her eye wasn't blackened or her nose off center or her neck swollen and bruised. She woke up and gave him a small smile. Something about how she looked at him pulled at him and he gave her a small smile of his own. She said they were friends and he felt that she wasn't lying. He had friends from before and she had mentioned Steve. Maybe she knew Steve and she had been sent to look for him? No it wasn't making sense and he couldn't remember her.
"I don't...I don't remember your name," he admitted and she nodded. She looked hurt for a second, deeply hurt before she pushed it away.
"My name is Alison Conley," she said softly and he nodded. He kept running his hand through her hair and she drifted back to sleep. He rinsed the bloody towel out before running it under the cold water again and placing it on her forehead the way he had seen Steve's mom do when Steve was sick.
"I know you," said Bucky and he frowned as he tried to get something to stick in his head. "Alison...Alison..."
"Can I touch you?" she asked calmly and all he could do was nod. She carefully took his face in her hands and she was almost cold to the touch. "Can you look at me please?" asked Alison softly and when he did look at her she gave him a sad smile. Her green eyes were patience and sad all at the same time. "That's better," she said and she brushed the damp hair off his face. Steve had his hand on his shoulder and he wasn't sure what he had done to earn their kindness.
"You know Steve," said Bucky brushing her hair back. He had been somewhere with her and Steve.
"We're you and Steve on a date the night I came in?" She smiled and turned red.
"No. It was supposed to be a dinner to meet what Sam assured me was just a friend and he brought Steve. People were trying to push a date and neither one of us wanted it," said Alison.
"You're too cute for him anyway, "said Bucky.
"You are too pretty," said Bucky and he kissed forehead and was confused a second later about why he felt he could do that to her. She's mine. The thought just floated through without reason. He spotted the chain around her neck and he carefully pulled the necklace up and studied the tags. One them belong to him and his grip tightened on the tags.
"If you had been my girl back then I would have given you one of these," said Bucky and he pressed the tag into her hand. Alison smiled and looked a little glassy eyed.
"So I guess this means I'm your girl Sergeant Barnes?" asked Alison.
"No...no...no..no..god no," snapped Bucky and it woke her up.
"Bucky?" asked Alison and he jerked away from her ashamed as memories started to slam back in. They were in pieces, but he remembered her and what she meant to him. How things had been for him the last six months and that he had been happy with her. I had Steve back...I had a home. I had you and you loved me, thought Bucky.
"I remember. I remember...you. You're my girl and I...damn it Ally what did I do to you?" asked Bucky. Why are you asking? Look at her! That's what you did! She stood up shakily and went over to him.
"It wasn't your fault. They wiped you again and you weren't in control," said Alison. She went to hug him and he stepped away.
"I didn't remember you," said Bucky. "I could have killed you and I wouldn't have known who you were. How can you even look at me right now?" asked Bucky.
"Because I love you that's how," said Alison looking at him with her one good eye pleading.
Bucky stood there shaking and he went to take a step towards her, before backing away. He put her in danger and nearly killed her without a second thought because someone told him to do it. He didn't remember that he loved her and would have forgotten her for good if she hadn't gotten him out of there. She killed for you. She had to save herself and she had to save you from yourself. Bucky looked at Alison and knew she would never blame him for what he had done. That she did still love him despite the nightmare she had gone through, despite the bruises and hurt he had caused her. She's not safe loving you. Did you really think you could have anything good after everything you've done?
"I love you too Ally," said Bucky. He hugged her and she hugged him back just has hard and he could feel the tears on his neck.
"I couldn't lose you. I couldn't...I couldn't let them hurt you again. We'll go home and it will be alright again," whispered Alison. I would have watched them hurt you if I hadn't snapped out of it. I almost did, thought Bucky and the memory of that animal with his hands on her had him shaking again with rage. Alison held him tighter and buried her face in shoulder. She started coughing again and she nearly doubled over from it. Bucky pulled her back to the bed and crawled into the bed to hold her. She was passing out again and she kissed his check.
"Just give me a few minutes and we'll figure out how to call the others. We'll go home...you...I love you," muttered Alison before slipping out again. The tears were hot and bitter for Bucky. He never should have pulled her into this. He should have planned a way out after his arm had been reattached. It would have been easier if I had walked away then, thought Bucky
"I shouldn't have fallen in love you with you. I couldn't help it," said Bucky softly. He kissed her forehead before scooping her up in his arms. She stirred for a second before drifting back off. He walked three blocks with her; she woke up a few times before dropping back off and coughing. Bucky spotted the clinic and something in his heart froze. We don't have to do this. We don't have to leave. We can go home. Don't hurt her like this.
"It's for the best. She already knows how to move on," said Bucky to himself. He walked into the clinic with her. It was empty except for a dozing nurse behind a desk.
"I need help," said Bucky in Spanish and the nurse shot up in her chair. She looked at Alison and her face went white. "She was mugged. Can you help her?" asked Bucky. The nurse yelled for a doctor and went into the back. Bucky carefully laid Alison on a row of chairs. She looked up confused.
"Where are we?" asked Alison. Bucky kissed her carefully on the mouth. He could feel the fever coming off her in waves. This is for the best.
"You're going home. I love you," said Bucky and he walked away. She called for him hoarsely and he started running. Alison went to get up and the world spun again.
"Bucky...Bucky...James," called Alison. She made it to the door to see him disappear down the street. Tears stung her swollen eye and blurred the vision she had in her good eye. Someone speaking Spanish pulled her back inside and Alison was too tired and weak to fight them. They were asking her name and she told them her name before slipping into blackness again.
…
"Three days," said Sam and Steve looked at him confused. They were still in South America looking for any sort of clue that would lead them to Bucky and Alison. Nothing was turning up and they had been missing for over twenty four hours now.
"After the Invasion, we couldn't find Alison or Matt for three days. It was such a cluster, no one had ID's, bodies were messed up bad and they took people to whatever hospital they could. I went to two different morgues three times each morning to see if Alison or Matt were there. I found Matt's body on the third day and her grandfather got the call she was alive an hour later. I really didn't know what I would have done if I found her in the morgue. When I found Matt there was this flicker of relief that I didn't find Alison. I almost lost her once Steve and I don't know if I can look through morgues again for her," said Sam.
"I wanted to look for Bucky in the Alps, but we didn't have the manpower to do it. I told myself the second the war was over I was going to look for him. I didn't care if I had to it myself. I won't let you do it alone," said Steve. Sam sighed.
"I haven't told Sophia or Renee. They're gonna kill me," said Sam. "I told them she wouldn't be in any superhero antics," said Sam and he looked defeated.
Sam had looked for Bucky for over a year and half and had always seemed to be a step or two behind him. He had pulled himself away from his family and his best friend to try and help him and it was debt Steve wondered how and if he could ever repay it. David was combing through police reports and Natasha was listening for any underground chatter on someone wanting out of Venezuela.
"Si. cabello castaño, ojos verdes ... sobre 5'5 5'6," said David quickly and excited. He grabbed a pen and started writing. "Había un hombre con ella?" asked David and his face fell about a bit. "Sólo ella. Gracias. Estaremos allí pronto." David hung up the phone and turned to them.
"There is an Alison in a hospital in Maracaibo," said David. Sam sank into a chair and looked ready to faint from relief. David looked at Steve sadly. "They said a man brought her in claiming that she was mugged and he just left. From the description he sounded like Bucky," said David. Steve sat down with a crushing weight on his shoulders. His friend was a ghost again.
…...
"Hey. Hey sleepy head. Wake up," said a male voice and Alison muttered at him to leave her alone and let her sleep.
"You know this has got to be a first. A bride who skips out and wants to sleep at her own wedding," said the voice and Alison felt her heart slam into ribs. It had been so long since she had heard that voice and well it had to be dream. Alison looked up and there standing over in his black suit with the purple tie she had bought for him one Christmas was Matt. Alison looked up at him stunned and he squatted down next to her. His bright brown eyes took her in and he laughed.
"You know you're going to get that white dress dirty taking naps on the beach," teased Matt. Alison took in her surroundings and they were near Coney Island.
"I don't care," said Alison and she threw herself at him and hugged him tightly. She had been having a nightmare. One long, drawn out and very intense nightmare that made her want to cry.
"Hey. Geez Ally you're shaking," said Matt and he took off his jacket and wrapped it around her. It was his scent, coffee and Dior. Had she really thought he was gone?
"It was just a really bad dream," said Alison and she kissed him hard. Something in the back of mind was protesting. James. And she shoved it away. James...Bucky...he wasn't real and even so in the dream he had left her behind. She was awake and home with someone who loved her. You would never leave me behind, thought Alison.
"Damn maybe should have bad dreams more often," teased Matt when he pulled away. He sat down in the sand next to her and sighed. "I think you had the right idea coming out. It's a zoo in there. My mom is tossing out her backhanded compliments to Sophia's aunt about the flowers, my dad and your grandpa are cleaning out the bar and I think one of your coworkers is coming on to my gay friend from band camp. All in all a good day," said Matt taking her left hand and kissing it. The wedding band clinked on the engagement ring and Alison grinned while leaning her head on his shoulder.
"Do you want to go back inside?" asked Matt and Alison shook her head. If they went back inside it would be noise and talk and people wanting to know how soon everything was going to start-her career, his career, when would they start having babies. No she wanted some peace and quiet for ten minutes
"It's nice out here. Let's stay just a bit longer," said Alison. She looked down the beach and saw Sam and it froze something inside her. Why was he just standing there looking at her? Alison closed her eyes and put her head on Matt's shoulder. She was home now and she wanted to stay here.
…
"Come on. Wake up. Open those pretty eyes and give me some sass," whispered Sam gripping Alison's hand hard. Steve stood in the doorway listening to Sam plead with Alison to wake up and he was listening to David plead with doctor to release her so they could take her back to New York. She was running a fever of close to 105 and they were worried about it getting higher and what it could do to her on the way back to the States. She also had two broken ribs, a broken nose, a concussion, bruises from being strangled and pneumonia. Steve looked at the woman in the bed and clearly there was a mistake. The happy woman he had seen out the door a day ago was replaced by a beaten shell that was trying to hang on and was losing. She was sick and although they were pumping anything they could to lower her fever and fight for her, it seemed to be a Band-Aid on a bullet wound. Natasha hovered near the bed and Steve saw her take Alison in before she locked herself down. He had seen her look at Fury that way when they had been operating on him.
"Daño cerebral," said one of the doctors and Steve could hear David trying to stay calm.
"Tenemos diferentes opciones de tratamiento en el hogar. Por favor, podemos tenerla de vuelta en los Estados Unidos en tres o cuatro horas. Ella sostiene en este momento y si queremos moverla tiene que ser ahora!" said David.
" Su vida, sus manos," said the doctor and he left to get paperwork to sign her out. Nurses came in and shooed them out to unhook Alison from everything. The Quinjet was on the roof. They just had to get her own the jet and pray she made it back to the Tower. David already called Cho and Banner to meet them at the Tower. David didn't want the other students to see her this way. I don't want them to see her this way, thought Steve.
"I'll make sure everything is ready," said David and he headed for the jet. Natasha took Steve's arm and Steve shook his head.
"He left her and he has a three hour head start on us. The only reason we found him is because she brought him in. I owe her," said Steve. Natasha nodded and went over to Sam to help him sign the release the forms. There was a part of Steve that wanted to go after Bucky and him come home even though he knew couldn't. The nurses left and he saw Alison on the bed trying to fight and that if Bucky were in his right mind he wouldn't have left her. You would want me to stay with her in your place. For you Buck. I'll stay with her for you, thought Steve. They wheeled Alison out and to the jet. They needed to get her home.
…
Bucky took the van and drove until it ran out of gas about fifty miles from the border separating Venezuela and Colombia. He pulled the van over and grabbed a backpack that had a change of clothes and a few weapons. He stuffed the money box in the backpack and was about to leave when he spotted the bloody clothes Alison had left behind. Bucky picked up the light brown sweater and frowned. It still faintly smelled like her, but it was mixed with smell of copper and smoke. He liked how she looked in the sweater, it made her eyes seem greener and it clung to her frame. We could go back. She still loves us and we could…
"Shut up!" hissed Bucky. He balled the sweater up and shoved into a side pocket of the backpack. He left the van and started walking on the side of the road.
What are you doing? asked a voice in a head and it sounded so much like Alison that Bucky almost thought it was her. There was no one and this was how it should be. Did he really think he could go back and be normal after everything he had done? That he could still do with a few words being spoken.
Alison had been able to bring him out of it, but what if it hadn't work? He would have been a mindless tool again that remembered nothing. He shouldered the backpack and kept walking. You left her. She was sick and hurt and you left her. After everything she did for you, you left her alone in the middle of nowhere. She won't love you anymore. Why would she love you after that? And Steve. Do you really think he'll understand this? You left him too when he was hurt. They saved your life and you just walk away. How are they going to explain what happened to Becca? Bucky wiped his eyes and kept walking. He needed to put miles in before Steve started looking for him. Unless Steve stayed with her since you left. He hoped Steve had stayed with Alison. Someone had to look out for now and she was safer with Steve than she had ever been with him. Becca might also be safer with him gone. Take care of my girls, thought Bucky as he crossed the border into Colombia.
…
Something about this was wrong and Alison couldn't put her finger on it. Matt's head rested on hers and she leaned back against him. He played with the loose strands of her hair and he sang in a mock British accent.
The sun ain't gonna shine anymore
The moon ain't gonna rise in the sky
The tears always clouding your eyes
When you're without love.
"Darling you are no Alan Rickman," said Alison looking up at him and he sighed.
"I tried. I think that movie was the first time I saw you cry," said Matt grinning as Alison turned around in mock rage.
"I was not crying over that movie. I was crying because we were in a shitty motel in Atlantic City and we placed third in a battle of bands competition. That band who won was horrible and the backup vocalist was clearly blowing one of the judges," said Alison and Matt laughed.
"You were watching Truly, Madly, Deeply on Encore. Sitting on the bed with a box of donut holes and crying during that poem scene," said Matt grinning and Alison couldn't help smile back.
"He was leaving huge chunks out of that poem and his accent was terrible," said Alison with a small laugh as the memory came back to her. "You said you would come back and haunt me. That you would bring back much cooler ghosts and…" Alison felt herself tear up and Matt looked at her puzzled.
"You sure you're alright?" asked Matt.
"That dream. It was super weird and vivid and it just felt so real even though it was crazy. It was some next level crazy," said Alison.
"What made it so crazy?" asked Matt.
"Sam had a jetpack and worked for Captain America for starters," said Alison and Matt shook his head.
"Okay. Give them up," said Matt holding out his hand.
"What?" asked Alison.
"Whatever sample drug you decided to pop to calm your nerves. Clearly it was awesome," said Matt and Alison shook her head.
"It had good moments, but some of it...I...you died and I...," said Alison. She looked away to try to get it together when she saw a tall blonde man with a young woman in a red jacket standing where Sam had been. It's Friday night I just want to walk out the front door. My mother always put cinnamon in her brownies. Alison can almost hear their voices and it froze something in her. It was a dream. It was all a dream.
"Ally?" asked Matt and she took Matt's hand and squeezed.
"Let's go for a walk," said Alison. She leaned against Matt and they started walking down the beach.
…..
"She thinks this is the dream," said Wanda softly and she stroked Alison's head. Steve looked down at Alison and sighed. If she doesn't make it, I'll have to tell Bucky if we find him again and he'll blame himself even more. He won't come back, not really if she dies. I don't know if Sam would come back from losing her. Wanda was talking softly to Alison and Steve wondered how she would handle another loss. Wanda had insisted on coming with Cho and Bruce and had paced nonstop until she was allowed to see Alison. Steve watched her face pale, but she held it together. She hadn't left Alison's side since they were allowed to see her.
They were back at the Tower and Cho, David and Bruce had gone back and forth about Alison's treatment. According to Cho, Alison's immune system was already messed up so they started her on a high dose of antibiotics. The fever had slipped a degree, but it was still very high. She needed some help breathing since her nose was broken, she kept coughing and being choked had bruised her airway so now she had tubes up her noses She had a tube in one arm for pain meds, another pumping in the antibiotics and one under the sheets to collect urine to test. They had to wear gloves, masks and gowns to be anywhere near her since her immune system was in such a bad state.
"What's she really dreaming about?" asked Steve sitting down.
"Her boyfriend who died," said Wanda frowning. "She's confused about what's going on though. Bucky... if he was dream it doesn't hurt so much," said Wanda and Steve took Alison's free hand and squeezed it. Steve had ordered Sam to rest, though Steve doubted he was doing much resting. Alison had put Sam in charge of all her care if she couldn't make a decision and Steve could only imagine the weight. You were supposed to be in charge of Bucky's well-being and look what happened, thought Steve. He should have insisted they be more careful going out, but he wanted something to be normal in Bucky's life. He could see the old Bucky when they were together. Didn't you use him enough? Bullies. They had to take everything, thought Steve.
"She still loves Bucky, but watching him go," said Wanda and she quickly wiped her eyes and cut herself off.
"I know it hurt her," said Steve and Wanda nodded.
"Are you going to look for him again?" asked Wanda.
"Once she pulls through and I can tell him something good," said Steve.
"Captain, Mr. Stark is here. He would like to see in his lab," said Friday. Steve patted Wanda's hand.
"I'll be back soon," said Steve. He stripped off the gown, gloves and mask the second he was out of the room and looked back at Wanda. She looked like she was singing to Alison and Steve forced himself upstairs.
When he got upstairs Tony, Bruce, Cho, David and Sam were waiting. Cho and Bruce looked bothered while David looked slightly nervous, but hopeful. Tony and Sam were impossible to read at the moment. Then again Tony was always a bit impossible to get a beat on, Sam on the other hand was always easy to read and it worried Steve that he couldn't read him. He looked older than thirty and unbelievable tired in both mind and body. Steve took a seat and Cho looked to Bruce.
"Her latest test results are back and she's just getting worse. We have on the strongest medication we can give her and it's not making a dent. We don't know how long she's been running that fever, but that combined with all the stress she's been under for the last twenty four hours hasn't helped. We're going to up her pain medication so she...well you know," said Bruce and Steve felt like he had been kicked in the gut. So she won't feel it when she goes, thought Steve. They had drugged his own mother to that point when she was sick and Steve hoped she really hadn't felt any pain. He felt enough pain for her.
"Or we could try what I suggested," said Tony annoyed and Bruce glared at him as Cho spoke up.
"We have no idea what that could do to her," said Cho. "She's a person not a lab rat," snapped Cho.
"It's a worth a shot though," said David and he looked at Steve. "If you want to hear us out on it," said David.
"What do you have in mind?" asked Steve puzzled.
"Well your blood underwent a lot of tests back in the day to see if they could recreate the Super Solider Serum. They didn't have a lot of luck and they burned through all their samples by 49. However, Howard had theory, but he didn't have a sample to run tests with. He thought your blood might have cures for stuff. Colds, flus...hell maybe even cancer," said David.
"There was accident and dad lost his sample of your blood before he could run the tests. I say we see if his idea had any merit," said Tony and Sam looked at Tony and David as what they were suggesting sunk in.
"You want to give Alison a blood transfusion from Steve? Are they even compatible?" asked Sam.
"Alison is A positive, Steve is O negative so there shouldn't be a bad reaction," said David and Sam gave them a look of like he had bitten into something sour.
"You want to test a seventy year old theory on my best friend?" asked Sam.
"She might not be your best friend much longer unless we do something," said Tony. Sam looked ready to swing when Bruce grabbed him.
"I'll let you hit him later," said Bruce.
"Could it hurt her?" asked Steve and Sam looked at him.
"Steve…" started Sam and David cut him off.
"Well no it shouldn't hurt her, but it could have side effects due to the serum. The one we're hoping for is that serum will fight off the pneumonia since her body can't do it. You heal four times faster than the normal person. It's a shot in the dark in the really, but it's something," said David.
"If we could test it out first," said Cho and Bruce sighed.
"Time is not in our favor to test it out," said Bruce. "I still don't think it's a good idea though," said Bruce.
"We're not going to zap her with any Vita Rays, Gamma Rays or any sort of rays so we can eliminate any of those mishaps" said Tony.
"What other side effects are we talking about?" asked Sam and David nodded to Steve.
"Well the super strength and speed might be one. Since we're not going to use the Vita Rays she might not get the height boost," said David smiling weakly. Steve thought about what Erskine had told him the night before he went through Project Rebirth. The serum amplifies everything inside, so good becomes great, and bad becomes worse. So that's why you were chosen. Would Erskine have chosen someone like Alison to go through Project Rebirth? Steve thought he would have. She was a good person and there was still a lot of good she could do. She had chosen to help a man that others would have walked away from. Even before she knew who he was she tried to help him. Steve thought of her work with Wanda, how she had befriend Becca...she was his friend too. He had a great deal of faith in Alison and not just because Bucky loved her, but because she had earned her place on this team and she was family.
"I'll do it," said Steve quickly and the others looked at him. Bruce and Cho looked unhappy, David looked relieved and Tony looked ready to get to work. Sam looked worried for some reason though.
"I can't...you don't have to do this," said Sam. "If this doesn't work out you'll blame yourself and…" Steve interrupted gently.
"And you'll blame yourself if we don't try everything we can to help her. She's my friend too Sam," said Steve and Sam sighed.
"I know," said Sam.
"How much blood do you need?" asked Steve.
"A pint maybe. They were testing it in small doses so we'll just give her a vile or two to see if it has any effect," said David.
"What we don't use I want destroyed," said Steve. Tony looked annoyed as David quickly agreed. "And if she pulls through we're not going to treat her like a lab rat. We'll let her recover and she goes back on the team," said Steve thinking about how they wanted him in a lab.
"Well Alison is a medical person...she might want to put herself in a lab and run her own tests," said Cho annoyed.
"We'll cross that bridge when it happens. Come on. I'll take your blood sample," said David. Steve followed David and while Steve didn't pray much anymore he thought of his mother and asked her for some help.
….
Bucky woke up slowly with Alison curled up behind him, one arm wrapped around him and her hand holding his. Bucky rolled over to face her and Alison was half awake already.
"Morning," said Alison softly. She had just come back from Niagara after spreading her grandfather's ashes. She still looked tired to him, but accepting of her grandfather's passing. Bucky kissed her forehead and pulled her closer. He saw the tags around her neck and started to fiddle with them.
"Did you always wear your father's tags?" asked Bucky.
"No. I started to wear them after I got out of the hospital. A reminder to not give up again," said Alison.
"You were just going to let me have them," said Bucky looking down at his own tags. Well one was his and the other was her father's. Considering how her grandfather had reacted when he had seen him with them it still stunned him that she let him have them.
"You needed a reminder to not give up," said Alison. "I know how easy is it to want to give up." She tucked his hair back and settled next to him. Bucky held their tags in his hands as she fell back asleep. She needed the rest badly after the week she had.
"Thanks for not giving up on me," said Bucky as he drifted back to sleep.
Bucky woke up on the floor of some warehouse and it hit him like a fist that he had sent her away. That he left her. It's for her own good. She'll be safe without me.
You gave up on us. Bucky wondered if and when he would stop hearing her voice in his head. He didn't know how much room he had for his own voices, let alone hers. He shouldered the pack and was careful to not leave any hint that he had been there.
Bucky wondered if Steve was looking for him yet or if they Hydra goons were looking for him after the mess left at the hideout. He needed to get out of the country and quickly. He didn't want to head back to the States and he didn't want to stay here. Maybe Europe would be a safe bet. Bucky bought a small coffee and weighed his options. He thought about what Bruce had told him about his time on the run. Boats are the best way to get around. I could always get a loading job or a kitchen job on a boat and get taken wherever I wanted with no questions. Bucky gave a wry smile at the thought. He had worked on loading docks, but never really thought about where the boats came from or where they went. He finished his coffee and noticed the tags still visible. Bucky quickly tucked them under his shirt and frowned.
He should get rid of them. They would make him stand out. If people saw them they might ask questions. He wore two black gloves to hid his hands and baseball cap he picked up to hide his face. He knew how to hide and not be seen anyone. It was a little scary how easy was for him to go back into the shadows. He should get rid of them, but the metal felt familiar on his skin and reassuring somehow. One of them belongs to her. She gave you something that meant a great deal to her. She wouldn't throw yours away, thought Bucky.
Was she alright? Did Steve and the other find her and get her home? I should have stayed, but it was too risky. They had to call the cops once they saw her and they would ask questions that I don't have answers too. Bucky went into a shop and bought a cheap phone before heading to another warehouse to hide. He made it point to memorize numbers and he dialed the number to someone who would give him answers and understand why he was running again.
…
Alison stopped in her tracks and looked at the little coffee shop. They tore it down five years ago. It's a Starbucks now, thought Alison. She went to fiddle with her necklace and couldn't find it. Maybe that was what clued her in that something was wrong or maybe she had known all along this was wrong. There was no way she would have been allowed to sneak out of her own wedding. She thought long and hard and couldn't recall the ceremony or the days leading up to it. She remembered the car crash though and all the things that had happened afterward with glaring clarity. Matt was gone and so was Bucky. Well he wasn't gone, but he had left her and somehow that hurt even more than if he had died.
"We had our first date here," said Alison and Matt grinned
"Well it really wasn't a date. We just hung out. I was too damn nervous to ask you out," said Matt. They went inside and Alison noticed two elderly men playing chess and mocking each other.
"Thought you were supposed to be the smart one," teased the man who still had a bit of blond in his hair and he took the queen off the board. The other man straightened up and Alison noticed his left arm was missing. It was his eyes though that caught her attention, how blue they were. Bucky?
"Well we all mess up from time to time," he said. He shook his head and looked over at her and Matt and grinned. "Did you ditch some poor guy at the altar to be with him?"
"Nope. Somehow I conned her into being with me," said Matt. He went to order their drinks and Alison was trying to wrap her head around what was going on.
"Congratulations," said Bucky with a small smile. Well she assumed it was Bucky and she smiled back.
"Thank you," said Alison and the other man Alison now assumed to be Steve shook his head.
"Didn't you sneak out of my wedding?" asked Steve and Bucky grinned.
" I skipped out with Dugan and Jim to go to bar for real drinks," said Bucky and he looked back over to Alison.
"He tried to set me with one of his wife's cousins. She had a terrible sense of humor. You look like you got some humor in you. Your husband is lucky I'm not seventy some years younger or else I might have talked you into something stupid," teased Bucky. Alison wasn't sure if she wanted to cry or scream. Matt came back and he sat down their drinks and Alison smiled at the hot chocolate. Steve and Bucky went back to their chess game and Matt studied her.
"You never told me how the poem went," said Matt.
"What?" asked Alison and Matt took her hand and he looked so serious it made her nervous.
"You aren't stupid Ally. You know that you don't belong here. I'm really happy you don't belong here. Not yet anyway," said Matt and his face soften a bit and Alison looked down at her drink.
"I'm tired Matty. I'm so tired of having to let people go. I've been saying goodbye to people since I was five. I know it's selfish, but I miss so many people," said Alison.
"You have a lot people who will miss you now. They need you more than we do. He needs you more than you know," said Matt and he looked over to where Steve and Bucky sat.
"He left me," said Alison numbly. "Maybe you were it for me," said Alison and he squeezed her hand.
"Maybe you're it for him. He loves you. You love him. I will admit I did not see you falling for a ninety year old guy, but he loves you. It scares him how much he loves you," said Matt.
"Fear is the heart of love," said Alison softly and Matt shook his head.
"It's nice to see how much of a dork you still are. I mean it though. He needs you. It's not going to easy, it's going to suck and people are going to get hurt. They're going to need you though. It's who you are," said Matt. Alison looked over to where Bucky and Steve sat and her heart hurt. She did still love him and she would do anything to bring him home.
"My Spanish is still terrible so I'll need you to tell me that poem in English," said Matt and Alison gave him a look.
"Really?" she asked.
"It's important. The whole poem" said Matt gripping her hand. Alison nodded and the words came to her. I had to memorize this for my Spanish finale. Pablo Neruda… The Dead Woman
If suddenly you do not exist,
If suddenly you no longer live,
I shall live on
I do not dare,
I do not dare to write it,
If you die
I shall live on.
For where a man has no voice,
there, my voice
Where blacks are beaten,
I cannot be dead.
When my brothers go to prison
I shall go with them.
When victory
Not my victory,
But the great victory comes,
Even though I am mute I must speak;
I shall see it come even though I am blind.
No, forgive me.
If you no longer live,
If you, beloved, my love,
If you have died,
All the leaves will fall in my breast,
It will rain on my soul night and day
The snow will burn my heart
I shall walk with frost and fire and death and snow,
My feet will want to walk to where you are sleeping, but
I shall stay alive.
Because above all things
You wanted be indomitable,
and , my love, because you know that I am not only a man
But all mankind
Alison felt her throat close up near the end and Matt squeezed her hand.
"You have always been indomitable. You just forgot. Don't forget it again," said Matt.
"I still miss hearing you play," said Alison.
"I know. Sometimes I miss that too," said Matt. She hugged him hard before she joined Steve and Bucky. Bucky grinned up her and Alison felt her chest get a bit tighter. She couldn't go back so the only choice was going forward. It was going to hurt, Maybe more than she could imagine. She sat down and took his right hand. He was no longer the old man he should have been. Bucky looked at her with those sad blue eyes and Alison hugged him hard. He seemed stunned before hugging her back.
"Let's go home," said Alison.
…..
Steve watched as Alison stirred and let out a small moan. He saw her wince at the light and he quickly dimmed it more. It took her awhile to open both her eyes, one more than the other and take in where she was. Sam was sleeping in a chair by her bed and Wanda had taken a bed down the hall. Steve couldn't sleep and stayed by her side. Natasha came in every so often and brought him coffee. David, Bruce and Cho kept taking readings and samples after they had done the transfusion. The fever had finally broken about two hours ago and her cough seemed to be lessening. Tony looked in on her a bit ago and shook his head.
"Oz was really rough on you Dorothy. Hopefully coming back to Kansas won't be so bad," said Tony and he looked at Steve. "There's a hospital in California that has a really good teaching program. I'll see if I can pull some strings and she can start there fresh in spring," said Tony.
"Why would she want to leave?" asked Steve and Tony looked at him blankly.
"Why would she want to stay after this? She was kidnapped, had god knows what done to her and is barely out of the woods fighting for her life. A real fresh start might do her some good," said Tony. Before Steve could say anything further Tony was leaving the room. He's his father, they need the last word, thought Steve. Alison had started to wake up shortly after.
"Steve," whispered Alison and she tried to sit up.
"Hey. Hey. Take it easy," said Steve and he gently made her stay down.
"I'm sorry. I'm so damn sorry. I didn't think he would…" Alison swallowed hard and winced. She doesn't want me to see her cry, thought Steve. Steve squeezed her hand and looked her right in the eyes.
"It wasn't your fault. None of this is your fault. You did the best you could under the circumstances," said Steve. "You're alive and so is Bucky. Let's just focus on that right now," said Steve and Alison nodded. Steve rang for Bruce before waking Sam up. Sam looked over and saw Alison was awake and he came over her bed and gave her a quick forehead kiss.
"Welcome home," said Sam looking happier than Steve had ever seen him.
"It's good to be home," said Alison and she looked at her IV bags. "I feel...weird. What am I on?" asked Alison. Sam looked at Steve and Bruce came in and looked relieved and worried all at once,
"I'll give you an extension on your assignments for this week," said Bruce and Alison gave him a ghost of a smile. Bruce took her temperature and other vitals before explaining what had happened and what they had done. Alison looked back and forth at Sam and Steve stunned.
"You didn't have to do that for me. You didn't…"
"Save your life?" asked Sam and Alison looked near tears.
"No...I mean…" Bruce shook his head.
"You've had a really long forty eight hours and you need some real rest. We'll do another CT Scan later," said Bruce. He adjusted her medication and Alison dropped back off. Bruce motioned they all needed to step out.
"Let's see if that keeps her out a bit longer. Her temperature is back to normal, I didn't hear anything when she coughed and well her bruises seem to be changing color already. I think she might have gotten that super healing. We'll see if she gets the rest of it when she's feeling better. Right now just let her sleep," said Bruce heading back to the lab.
"She just needs time now," said Sam. She's going to need a lot time to work through everything, thought Steve.
…..
Bruce was about to input Alison's latest vitals when his phone rang. Without looking at the caller ID he answered the call.
"Hello," said Bruce.
"Is she alright? Did you find her?" asked Bucky and Bruce almost dropped the phone.
"Where are you?" asked Bruce.
"Is she alright?" repeated Bucky and Bruce could hear the rising note of panic in his voice.
"She's resting right now. She's going to be alright," said Bruce. He didn't get into how she was going to be alright over the phone. It would come later when it was time. Bruce knew he just needed a basic answer.
"I didn't mean to hurt her. Not the real me...I didn't have control," said Bucky sounding defeated and Bruce sighed.
"I know. I know," said Bruce. He did know all too well what it was like to have the one you love see a monster. That even after seeing the monster they still loved you.
"I just need to think. I can't think with her because I feel too much with her," said Bucky sounding panicked again.
"It's alright. Take all the time you need. She'll be here when you come back," said Bruce. He had a feeling that Alison would be here no matter what Tony offered her.
"I don't know if I can come back. I don't know if I should have come back to start with," said Bucky more to himself than to Bruce. "I'm glad she's alright. It's all I needed to know," said Bucky before ending the call. Bruce sighed and thought about getting Steve or Natasha to let them know Bucky had made contact. A trace on the phone number would be useless since Bucky most likely got a burner cell and he stayed on long enough for a trace.
Bruce put the data in and sat in his chair exhausted. He knew all too well the need to run and hide It was easier to hide than to fight. He wished he would have told Bucky to stay and fight.
…
Bucky smashed the phone once the call was ended. He didn't think Bruce would try anything to locate him, but it was better safe than sorry. Bucky went to reorganize the pack when he found the balled up sweater in the pack. He frowned looking at it, why had he grabbed it? It still smelled a bit like her despite the blood on it. Bucky frowned looking at the blood and he took it into a small bathroom and started trying to get the blood off. The blood was dry and stiff so he couldn't get it all off. He wrung it out and put it back in the pack. Why are you keeping that? Because I need to. I need to remember her. They made me forget and I don't want to forget anything, thought Bucky.
You should write it down. Like we did before. Her voice in his head again. Calm and rational in his head. Maybe her voice in his head wouldn't be so bad. Bucky finished packing and headed down to the docks to see about a boat job to Europe. On the way he stopped in a small bookstore and bought three hardbound journals and a set of pens. He wouldn't forget again.
…...…...….…..
Steve told Becca in person what had happened and that Bucky was missing again, Becca looked out her window fighting back her tears the way Alison had done.
"Poor Bucky. Poor Alison. Oh Steve, this isn't your fault either," said Becca and she took Steve's hand and Steve could barely look at her.
"I thought he safe now that he was home. I just wanted him to happy again," said Steve.
"He was..is happy. He came home once. I'm sure he'll find it again," said Becca and she kissed him on the forehead. "You came home again," said Becca softly.
"Did I?" asked Steve and Becca hugged him.
"You've made one and don't forget that. You are a good man Steve Rogers. I know my brother and he's a stubborn one, but he'll do the right thing in the end. Just like someone else I know," said Becca. After Steve left she called her son and told him she wanted to make a small change in her will. She wanted to leave her mother's ring to a friend.
…..
Maria had done her debriefing, Bruce had done her head CT Scan to make sure she didn't have any injuries there, Wanda had Vision bring her Bailey and Sam had finally gone to sleep. Alison sat up with the puppy in her bed. The dog rested her head on Alison's lap and kept looking at her worried. Alison stroked the dog's head without much thought. She felt weird, like her body was humming. She knew her side didn't hurt anymore and that she was able to see out of her other eye better now. The swelling around her neck was already fading. They still wouldn't let her look in a mirror until the surgeon came in and fixed her nose. Humming...like electricity in a wire. Was this how Steve felt afterwards? Is this what Bucky felt afterwards?
She knew that Bucky had left because he felt it would protect her, but it still didn't change the hurt. She had hoped for a second that she would wake up and find Bucky here with her. He wasn't here and no one had a clue to where he could have gone. Her free hand went up to tags and she toyed with them. Lost in her thoughts she didn't notice Natasha until she sat down on the bed and started petting the dog.
"You held your own out there," said Natasha and Alison shrugged dismissively. "None of that," said Natasha sharply and Alison looked at her.
"I killed four people, I barely made it out and I lost Bucky in the process. Not seeing a lot of win in this," said Alison.
"I knew an agent who an assignment go bad in Bahrain. Three teams were taken hostage and there was an unknown number of hostiles. She got in, took out the hostiles and saved almost all the hostages. She couldn't get over the one she couldn't save and it ruined her for a long time. You did what needed to do to get out. Bucky is out there and still in his mind. You saved him from something worse. You saved yourself," said Natasha. She got up to leave when Alison spoke up.
"I didn't want to kill them, but I knew if I didn't they were going to kill me or something even worse with Bucky. I didn't feel anything when I did it...now I just feel weird and numb," said Alison.
"It will pass. You held your own. Don't be ashamed of that," said Natasha before leaving the room. Alison looked down at the dog and wondered what she would feel when she stopped feeling weird and numb. Right now there was only one other thing she could think of.
"I'm going to find you no matter what it takes or how long I have to look. I'm going to find you," said Alison.
….
Bucky found a boat going to Argentina and in a month he could get one going to Spain. From there he could go anywhere. He sat in his bunk with his journal and started writing.
My name is James Buchanan Barnes. I was born in March 15th of 1917. I had a mother named Wendy and a sister named Rebecca. My best friend was Steve Rogers and I have a girl named Alison Conley.
The others were playing cards or sleeping in their bunks. Bucky opened his pack and took out Alison's sweater and held it. She would come looking for him and Bucky wasn't sure what he would do if she found him. He missed Alison, but he was doing this for her. She can go back to a normal life. He put the sweater and the journal back in his pack. Bucky drifted off to sleep and dreamed that he came home from the war. He went to dance hall and there in her purple dress waiting for him was Alison.
If you can watch The Poem scene in Truly, Madly, Deeply with Alan Rickman and not cry I suggest you see the doctor ASAP. I had wanted to use this poem in this story even before his passing. Truly, Madly, Deeply did inspire a bit of Alison. Look it up on Youtube.
One chapter to go before I pick up with Civil War. Let me know what you think.