Bel sat on his bed as he sorted through the baby clothes Lussuria had just brought home for him. He didn't know what gender his baby was, so he liked how the Sun Guardian had had the sense to buy gender neutral clothes; this way, he could be prepared for anything. He wanted to smile as the reality of him being a parent became more and more clear, but even now, almost two months after having been rescued, he still hadn't been able to smile; it was almost as if he had completely lost the capability of doing so.

The boy folded a light blue shirt and added it to the pile of what he liked best before he looked over to Lussuria. Even now, he was still quiet as he spoke with that hint of fear the other Varia were beginning to think would never disappear still apparent in his voice. "Squalo said the Vongola are coming here…"

"Yes, sweetheart." Turning his attention from the instructions for the baby crib he had just bought, Lussuria offered the boy a smile. "Squ-chan will be going to Japan personally to bring them back. He was thinking that you might feel more comfortable around people closer to your own age."

Bel dropped his head and frowned as he rubbed at his bulging stomach; if they knew the truth… "They won't come near me; they'll think… that I'm disgusting…"

"No, honey, not at all; they want to help you." Wishing he could sit beside Bel and give the younger a hug, Lussuria instead stayed where he was; it wouldn't do to upset the Storm any more than he already was. "They don't think you're disgusting; they understand that you had been… Well… They know the circumstances of the baby, Bel-chan…"

Feeling his face pale as anxiety consumed him, Bel instead tried to focus on his task of sorting through the many items Lussuria had bought; he knew it wouldn't be long now before he gave birth, and as much as he wanted this baby, he was very daunted by the fact that he knew it would have to be cut out of him – but unlike Verde who was just cruel in his efforts, at least the Varia should try and keep the pain as minimal as possible.

"Lussu…?" Bel's frown deepened as he rubbed circles against his stomach. "…Do you know how you're going to get it out…?"

"Not yet, sweetheart; I never thought I would have to learn something like this. But I'll find a way to get it out safely; I promise."

Bel sniffed as he nodded and rubbed at his eyes. He opened his mouth to respond, but he quickly stopped as he felt a horrible cramp in his stomach take him by surprise. Gasping in pain, he wrapped his arms around his stomach as he curled inwards. He groaned loudly at another cramp, this one more painful than the first, and when the blood started dribbling past his lips, he knew it was time; it seemed his baby wanted to come out earlier than even Verde had anticipated.

"Lussu…!" Whining as tears rolled down his cheeks, Bel panted heavily; he knew he was going to have complications with this birth, because despite the unnatural occurrence in his stomach, he still shouldn't have been bleeding like this; the bleeding had been eliminated after the first few pregnancies. "Get it out…!"

Lussuria jumped to his feet at this and rushed over to Bel. Pushing back on the boy's shoulders, he laid the younger down on the bed. "Where are your knives, Bel-chan?"

Bel coughed up blood before he whimpered as he pointed a shaky hand to his bedside drawers. He listened to the man rummaging through them before he heard footsteps rushing to the door and Lussuria calling for help.

"Lussu…!" Bel cried heavily at the pain and the memories that were floating through his mind; he couldn't help but remember all the previous births, the agony he had endured that wasn't entirely physical, and all of a sudden, he begun doubting his fellow Varia members; what if they took his child away from him, too? What if they did nothing to help him, let his child die, or didn't care to numb the pain? What if the past couple of months had all been a lie and they didn't care at all?

"Don't thrash, Bel-chan!"

Bel screamed when hands grabbed his shoulders to hold him down, and his struggling increased; he had to get away to somewhere safe, and if he had to, he would cut his baby out himself; he couldn't let his last hope of having a child be taken away again.

"Bel-chan!"

"No! Please! Please! Don't!" Bel didn't even know what he was begging for; all he knew was that he needed the others to leave him alone, to let him have his baby, even if it meant unbearable amounts of agony.

"Bel-chan, it's going to be okay; we promise!"

Bel screamed again as he felt something prick his arm; why were they trying to give him an aphrodisiac? Hadn't he been through enough?! "Stop it! Stop it! I don't want to!"

"Brat, it's for the pain; Lussuria's getting the baby out now, so stop moving around!"

Bel kicked out wildly in an attempt to protect himself when he felt the tell-tale signs of a sharp blade against his stomach; he had been so badly traumatised, all he could think about was his time back with Verde, dissociating himself from reality. His crying became hysteric when he felt someone grab his legs and hold him down, and he was so distressed when he felt the first incision in his stomach, he turned his head to the side and vomited.

But then, after several more cuts to his stomach and an untellable amount of time later, the fog in Bel's cognitive abilities was broken by a loud, unfamiliar wailing. Feeling all hands let go of him, Bel rolled onto his side and tried to pull his legs to his stomach, only to cry out in pain as his stomach sent a tsunami of agony through his nerves. The boy still wasn't coherent enough to register what was happening, so when hands grabbed his hips and rolled him to his back once more, he started crying again; he had no energy left to fight against whatever was going to be done to him.

"It's okay, Bel-chan; Squ-chan has your baby." Finding it hard to understand what was being said to him, Bel just continued to cry. "I need to stitch your stomach back up, and then you can hold your baby."

It was then Bel understood; the loud wailing and the feeling of some sort of thread being stitched through his stomach… Panting heavily as sweat coated his face and body, Bel tried to push himself upwards, only to fall back down. Whimpering in despair, more tears rolled down his cheeks; why did the world hate him so much…?

"Here, brat." Feeling pillows being stacked up behind him and careful hands helping him rest against them, Bel then opened his arms, silently begging for his child.

When the tiny baby was placed into his hold, Bel peeked through his long bangs down at it. He wanted so badly to smile at the exhausted joy he felt, but even now, he still couldn't; he could only run his fingers through the small lumps of black hair that stuck up from its skull, its eyes closed as its wailing quietened down. Letting tears of uncertain happiness roll down his cheeks, Bel, too, closed his eyes as he held the baby higher and nuzzled his face against its tiny cheek.

"It's a girl, Bel-chan." Looking at Lussuria, Bel hadn't even noticed that the stitching had been completed; he had been too focused on his child to even feel it. "Congratulations."

Bel looked to Squalo next and frowned at the long-haired man as Squalo shifted in uneasiness. "…"

Squalo tried to offer his own smile, and his eyes darted to the side as he asked, "What are you going to name her, brat…?"

"…" The boy leant further back against the pillows and closed his eyes as he whispered, "…C… Chiara…"

"How lovely." Lussuria reached out to take hold of Chiara's little hand, but he stopped when Bel reached out and pushed him away before pulling Chiara closer to his chest. "Oh? I'm not going to hurt her, Bel-chan."

Bel couldn't trust these words, no matter how well he knew Lussuria; he had already lost every other baby he had had and he didn't need to have his trust betrayed and to lose this one, too. Finally… Finally… He was holding his child… "…"

Squalo, who was more understanding than he would let on, shook his head. "Voi, Lussuria. Leave him alone; he just had his kid. He doesn't need to deal with you trying to take his kid's attention."

"Maa~ But I suppose you're right; Bel-chan just wants to be with his baby." Looking back at the new parent, Lussuria's hidden eyes sparkled with joy. "We'll leave you two alone; try and get some rest, Bel-chan; you're going to need it."

Thankful to see the two men leave his room, Bel waited until they were gone before he laid down on his side and held his child close as he drifted off into sleep; giving birth to a baby was much too tiring, and he desperately needed sleep.

~~XX~~

With the rest of the Varia leaving Bel be, they knew they couldn't leave him alone forever; Bel didn't know what he was doing, and he needed help. It was Lussuria, the one who knew the most about babies, who finally coaxed his young comrade into the bath with Chiara. The blond had been nervous, afraid of hurting his child, but finally, he was ready to dress her and put her to bed.

"That's right, Bel; remember to support her head." Supervising the Storm Guardian as Bel was the gentlest he had ever been with anything, Lussuria was glad to see such a young boy taking charge; he had been worried things might be too hard for Bel, and that once the baby was born he would decide he didn't want it anymore - but to his relief, Bel seemed adamant in being a parent, despite his young age and lack of knowledge.

Bel hummed in response as he tenderly tugged the shirt over Chiara's body and straightened it out once her arms were in the sleeves. He then picked her up once more, having gotten her ready for sleep. Resting his cheek on top of her head, Bel frowned at Lussuria. "What do I do now, Lussu…?"

"It's time for a bottle now." Lussuria smiled at the sight before him before he turned around in order to head downstairs to the kitchen. "I'll go and make it for her; get yourself comfortable so you can feed her."

Bel didn't want to admit that he didn't need bottles and instead kept silent and accepted Lussuria's offer; he had only told Mammon his secret, and he wasn't ready for anyone else knowing; he would just have to feed Chiara in his own manner once he had some privacy.

Bel got back onto his bed and laid against his mountain of pillows as he held Chiara close. He grabbed the TV remote from next to him and turned it on before lowering the volume as low as it would go; he didn't need to disturb Chiara when she was trying to sleep.

Bel didn't wait long at all for Lussuria to return, and with help from the man to get into the right position, Bel found himself relaxing ever-so-slowly as he fed his daughter. He couldn't help but stare down at her, wanting more than anything to love her, but he was finding it hard to feel more than just affection; was it because of how she had been conceived…? Because he hadn't been ready to have her…?

"What's on your mind, Bel-chan?" Lussuria took a seat on the other side of the room when he noticed the lost look on the boy's face; he wasn't going to leave Bel alone if the other needed someone to talk to.

"…" Bel ducked his head and said, "I always heard you fall in love with your baby…"

"Ah, but Bel-chan, you just had her, and look at what was done to you; it's natural for you to feel hesitant and distant from her, but don't give up; you just need some time to cope before you can learn to love her."

Bel nodded but he didn't reply; he just held Chiara closer to him.

It was Lussuria who spoke again. "Squalo is bringing the Vongola kids here sooner than planned; he thinks they'll be of help to you since they've already been around babies."

Bel tensed and shook his head as his eyes widened beneath his long bangs. "I don't want them around Chiara…"

"I'm sure they will respect your wishes, Bel-chan." Lussuria glanced at his wristwatch and then stood back up. "I have to go into town, sweetheart; call me if you need anything."

Bel nodded and removed the bottle from Chiara's lips now that she had fallen asleep. He leant across her to put it on the nightstand and then tugged his blankets up over both of them. Pulling her close against him, he only watched a few minutes more of TV before he, too, joined her in sleep.