Chapter 150

Ari could see why it was suggested that the droids stay behind. She forgot how slopped the landscape was. All around there were hills of rolling meadows. She remembered playing hide and seek among the tall grasses with the other children during the spring festivals. Their laughter and shouts of delight were often accompanied by the constant thundering of the nearby waterfalls.

Ari shook her head, focusing on the present. Those memories were so clear now that she was back on Naboo but they could have very well been the memories of someone else, from another lifetime.

Though she had the basic idea of the direction to go, she couldn't remember exactly where the gravesite was located. Things always looked different to a child, so she focused on the Force, letting it help guide her. It felt odd to Ari, using the Force like in such a tranquil setting. She used it so often while practicing with her lightsaber or in battle that using it in a serene meadow like this was almost soothing.

As they approached the gravesite, Ari slowed the speeder, than stopped it. "We'll have to walk from here." She got out of the speeder with ease, feet landing without a sound. Then she glanced at her companions. Luke got out of the speeder as well, much like she did. Han had got out of the speeder then offered his hand to Leia. She took it and stepped out gracefully. Ari stole a glance at Luke who smiled faintly at this.

Though she was curious as to what Luke and Leia were thinking, she didn't ask and she didn't use the Force to find out either. Private thoughts were supposed to be for that person alone, unless they wanted to share them, or if they somehow broadcast it through the Force. She wondered how they felt about being here; about to visit their mother's grave.

Ari found it hard to imagine not knowing her mother. She still missed her mother, every day, though years had passed since that fateful day when she lost her entire family. She imagined it would be different though, since both Luke and Leia had never met her and both had been raised by loving parental figures. Leia clearly had loved her adopted father and though she didn't often speak of her adopted mother, who had died when Leia was young, it was obvious the Princess had loved her as well. Luke's uncle, through gruff, did care for Luke and his aunt was as kind a person as anyone that Ari had ever known. While Luke and Leia had been given time to think about their father, the man who became Darth Vader, they had just recently learned about their mother. They did not know her, yet they were coming to her grave.

Ari only needed a moment to lead the short distance up a path through a few trees. There was a way to come with speeders, but this was the only way Ari knew, though she was finding everything seemed different compared to how things were years ago when she was brought here by her mother.

It only took a minute until they were in a beautiful clearing, where there were wild flowers in bloom. They covered the entire clearing except for one area, which drew Ari's attention immediately. Padme's grave. It was clearly maintained well, with fresh flowers there. The stone still looked polished and the words engraved were clearly visible.

Ari had considered walking over, but when Luke walked over, Leia just a step behind, Ari stayed back. Han did the same, apparently felt uncomfortable, from what Ari could see. He kept glancing around and saw him shifting his weight from one foot to the other. She knew that he was an orphan so this probably felt strange for him. She had thought to ask him about his childhood, but it never seemed to be the right time and this certainly wasn't it.

So, the two of them just stood there silently, watching Luke and Leia approach the grave. The twins stood so close, their shoulders were nearly touching. Ari couldn't tell if they spoke, since their backs were to Ari and she was too far to hear, even if words were spoken.

Ari watched as Luke reached over and touched something on the headstone. A hologram appeared and even from the distance, Ari could tell it was Padme. It wasn't just one picture though. It showed her as a young child, then a dozen more, showing images of her growing up, including when she became princess, then queen and finally senator.

She watched as Luke wrapped one arm around Leia, who was ever so slightly leaning against him. She could sense this was difficult for them. The mother they never knew. Yet, there was something peaceful about the area, which softened the pain of loss.

Something about Naboo tugged at Ari and she felt a mixture of things. Raw, aching loss from her family was something she had hidden away for years, keeping busy and burying it deep inside her. Being back on Naboo reminded her of all she had faced and all she had lost. Her family was gone, as were many friends who had fought alongside her in the Alliance. The feelings of sadness swept over her, but then she slowly felt some of the pain ebb away. It was still there. It might always be, but the serenity of this place as well as the beauty of Naboo, seemed to be helping to heal her. It also brought back happier memories.

All of those memories came back in a rush. She remembered playing in fields like this one as a child. There was also the memory of when she met her baby brother, Jett, just hours after he was born. Aunt Sabe and her mother letting her play dress up with their gowns that were much too big for her. Growing up on Tatooine, which hadn't been easy, but she remembered the good times. The beautiful sunrises and sunsets. Being allowed to keep her candido, Saber. Hard work, yet her mother tried to make it not seem so bad. Her father made sure they never went hungry or thirsty. Her parents had run instead of fighting more, probably because of their children. Though she didn't have any, Ari understood now. They both could have fought, but could have died and then she and Jett would have been left alone, which they couldn't let happen. Then, of course, there was Luke. Since she moved to Tatooine, he had become a constant in her life. Yes, Biggs and Luke did a lot together, they were almost like brothers. Yet, she still had considered Luke her best friend. Now, it was certainly something more. Love.

Ari had followed Luke from Tatooine and her life had changed forever. She became a Jedi Knight, had helped destroy the Empire and was seeing the dawn of a new government forming. She also had met people that she now couldn't imagine not being in her life.

Leia, who Ari was still trying to understand. Luke's twin and a very brave, talented politician who also had Force abilities. Perhaps she couldn't understand Leia because Leia was still trying to understand it all too. Anakin Skywalker became Darth Vader and destroyed Alderaan, murdering millions. Leia was forced to watch it and she was tortured too. Yet, Anakin Skywalker had married Senator Amidala, bringing two children into the world. Luke and Leia. It wouldn't surprise Ari if Leia was having trouble dealing with all of this.

Then there was Han. The smuggler wasn't a smuggler anymore. He was a high ranking official now, if he kept his position now that the war was over. Ari doubted her would go back to smuggling. He was too well known now. He would probably keep the Falcon though and keep flying too. He might seem rough, but Ari knew he did have a good heart. In small, little ways, it would show, though he would probably deny it.

Then there were others. Chewie, who was quite brave and loyal. He pledged a life debt to Han, to travel with him even when he had a family at home. Though Ari couldn't really translate or speak like a Wookie, she was quite fond of the large alien. There were the droids. Arfour, Artoo and Threepio. They seemed so much like people, she often forgot they were machines. They had personalities and she knew she would be very upset if something happened to them. There were others, like Lando, Taga, Taylor, the Narabe family and all of the other Rebels.

It stunned her to realize that though she considered herself an orphan, she really wasn't, not really. She had loyal friends and, in a way, she had formed a family with them, especially Luke, Leia, Han, Chewie and the droids.

"Are you alright?"

Han's question brought her back to the present and when she looked at him, she noticed he looked blurry. She frowned and rubbed her eyes. They were wet and she brushed at her cheeks.

She had been crying and hadn't even noticed. They weren't just tears of grief though. They were also bittersweet. The pain would always be there, but it got easier to think of the good instead of just the bad.

"Yeah," she assured him.

He gave her a look, clearly not believing her.

"I am," she insisted, brushing away at the trails left by tears. She gave him a small smile, finding it hard to explain why she had cried and why things were going to be alright. Luckily, Han didn't ask for more clarification.

They both glanced over when they saw movement out of the corner of their eyes. Luke and Leia were walking back toward them. Leia looked more shaken than Luke, though Luke was good at hiding his emotions.

No one had to say anything as they walked back to the speeder. Ari had a feeling that no words could say how they felt. It wasn't uncomfortable though. As Ari got in, she glanced at Luke, asking if he was okay, without saying a word. He just gave a nod, giving her a questioning look.

She nodded as well. She could hear Han and Leia talking quietly in the back and though she could have listened to hear it, she would never use her abilities for that. Casting one last look in the direction of the hidden grave Ari powered up the speeder again and soon they were headed back to the Lake Retreat.