Chapter Seventy-Nine

Syaoran didn't sleep well that night.

It wasn't the soreness in his cheek. The throbbing ache had subsided and his vampire blood had healed him. Truthfully, Seishirou hadn't hit him very hard. Only hard enough to get his point across.

Only hard enough to ruin everything, he thought, eyelids sliding open. He'd taken his pills hours ago, and had been curled up in his sleeping bag on the floor ever since, waiting for the moment he could fall asleep. But he couldn't keep his eyes closed.

He remembered sleepless nights. He'd had his share of them in Infinity, when he'd still been dreaming of the Other. When sleep had ceased to be a reprieve, he'd done his best to avoid it. Having pills to keep the nightmares away was a luxury that afforded him a few extra hours of sleep at night—a luxury, he decided, he might be better off without.

I've had it too easy these past few weeks, he thought, curling up tighter and pulling the slippery blankets around him. Sleeping in, no nightmares, not getting seriously hurt . . . It's been so easy, it doesn't seem real.

He closed his eyes again. Dwelling on his time away from the others wouldn't get him to sleep any faster. But he still couldn't quiet his mind.

It had taken a moment to process the fact that Seishirou had slapped him, and even now, Syaoran couldn't quite believe it. Up until Outo, the dark-haired man had never raised a hand against him or the Other. And he'd only killed the Other in Outo because that was a made-up world, where the consequences brought on by death were not as severe as they were in reality.

But this was reality, and Seishirou had really hit him.

Syaoran tried to reason through it. Yes, he'd provoked the older man. But even so, the whole situation had been handled poorly. Kurogane-san never would have hit him. Neither would Fujitaka-san. There were dozens of ways Seishirou could've handled it, all of them better than what he'd done.

Syaoran crawled out of his sleeping bag and donned his day clothes. In less than a minute, he was outside, sitting at the edge of the field.

He dug in his pocket for the bolt he'd found in Cirrus. He was always careful to transfer the metal object into whatever he was wearing for the day, so much so that it had become a habit. He could no more leave it behind than he could've walked away from Sakura, if they somehow met again.

"So who's the girl?"

He leapt to his feet. The movement was probably too fast for a human, but he'd been trained to react for too long to just sit there. When he took in the face of his visitor, he relaxed. "Oh, hi Sadie." He frowned, processing her question now that he'd ascertained there was no danger. "It's nothing you need to worry about."

The blond girl frowned, then walked over to him. "You normally up at this hour?"

He sat back down. "No. Are you?"

"Not usually." She took a seat beside him, her eyes alight with curiosity. "You sure it's not about a girl?"

He sighed, cradling the bolt in his palms. "Maybe a little bit," he admitted. Maybe a lot.

Sadie's voice softened. "Did you two break up?"

"We were never together."

"Oh." It was silent for a moment. Syaoran could almost hear the words at the tip of the girl's tongue, but he could see just as clearly that she was afraid to say them.

"She's not dead or anything," he told her. Sadie's shoulders collapsed in relief. "I just miss her, that's all. And the rest of my . . . family."

"Oh . . . Well, I'm sure they'd be real happy to have you back, wherever they are."

He bit his lip. "I don't think they would."

"Don't be silly! Of course they'd take you back, they're your family."

He shook his head. "I messed up pretty bad." I don't deserve their forgiveness.

"Are all boys such idiots?" Sadie demanded suddenly, rising to her feet and taking several steps across the berry field. "If you've got a girl waiting for you back home, you've gotta go back to her. Otherwise she'll end up marrying someone else and moving on, and you'll be left alone."

Alone. The word echoed hollowly in his ears, like the dissonant chime of bells. The air around him suddenly felt cold. He looked down. "It's more complicated than that."

"Bullshit," Sadie said, and for a moment, Syaoran wondered if everyone in this world was going to remind him of Kurogane-san. "They'll be happy to see you again, no matter what. Especially if they've missed you as much as you miss them."

His fingers curled tighter around the screw. Moonlight glinted off the steel surface. Fai said everyone missed me, back when we talked in Cirrus. Why would he say that unless it was the truth? And he helped me hunt, helped me stay in control of the bloodlust. He said I could come back . . . Syaoran wrapped his arms around his torso.

"I'm going back inside," Sadie said. "But you should think about going back. I'm sure they'll be happy to see you."

"Yeah . . ." he whispered, too quietly for the girl to hear as she walked back to the house. "Maybe."

The wooden swords met with a crash.

"You're still telegraphing your moves," Kurogane said, moving to block the princess's next strike. The practice swords struck each other again, and he deflected the brunt of her attack.

It was rather like trying to spar with a kitten. The princess would approach, bold as a tiger, but when she struck, her attack was so weak it wouldn't have hurt even if he'd let it hit him. Maybe the mage was onto something when he gave her that stupid nickname in Outo, he thought, moving to counterattack. Too late, Sakura raised her fake sword to block the strike. The rounded tip of his stick struck her elbow, and she recoiled, falling backward.

Kurogane lowered his sword and extended a hand to help her up. "Your stances are getting better."

Surprise flashed across her face, as if she didn't think she'd heard right. Then the words sunk in and she smiled.

No wonder the other kid fell in love with her, he thought. Her whole face changes when she smiles like that.

Sakura took a fighting stance again, still glowing from the compliment. Jeez, if I'd known it was that easy to make her happy, I would've said something a long time ago. By tacit agreement, they continued their practice. It wasn't quite sparring. Sparring implied that both parties were near enough to the same level to fight each other fairly. But it was close. Maybe if the boy ever comes back . . .

He banished the thought from his mind. For them, at least, it had been months since they'd seen the brat in Cirrus. Longer than the time he and the wizard had been forced together in Shura. While there was a chance the boy might return, it was unwise to plan for it when time passed so differently between dimensions. If he intends to come back at all . . .

They went on practicing until the sun fell from the sky. In this world, the sun turned sapphire whenever it got close to the horizon. The same went for the moon. From what he'd been told, some great power had sparked a change in the environment that made the sun turn blue. Here, they called it the Mist.

They'd landed in this world two weeks ago, over forty miles from the feather. With pockets of population spread so thin over this area, and the suspicious nature of their party, they'd been unable to secure any horses for transport. They'd been walking three miles every day toward the source of the Mist, but since the feather's effect seemed largely inert, most of those days were spent working on the princess's sword skills.

And good thing, otherwise I'd have to listen to the magician every waking hour of the day, Kurogane thought, parrying another clumsy attack.

The princess was breathing hard with exertion, though he'd only been halfway paying attention to blocking. He brought his fake sword around and hit the joint between her thumb and her wrist. The sword dropped from her hands.

"We're done for the night," he said, more out of habit than any real need to stop. The sun had set, and the mage was making dinner in one of the soup pots they'd acquired during their travels.

Sakura nodded, extending one hand in a silent request. He gave her his practice sword and watched her walk back over to their supplies and wrap them up. In a way, she was just as diligent as Syaoran, despite being born into nobility.

"We'll reach the canyon by tomorrow," Fai announced as they gathered around the fire.

Sakura nodded. The smile she'd worn a few minutes ago had vanished.

"Finally," Kurogane said. "We landed so far away, it's a wonder we're going to get there at all."

"Mokona tries!" the white creature cried. "But Mokona can't always get close to the feather on the first try."

Kurogane took the bowl of chili the mage offered him and started eating. About three bites in, the white pork bun squeaked, eyes opening wide.

"What is it?" Sakura asked, her voice almost as high as the long-eared creature's squeak.

"Mokona felt a big wave from just beyond the canyon!"

"Another feather?" Fai asked, eyebrows disappearing behind his hair.

Kurogane rose to his feet, the realization piercing through him like a sword. He said only two words, but those were enough to derail everyone's confusion. "The boy."