Chapter Ninety

The offer hung in the air, defining a new connection between them. Syaoran stared at Sakura, his breath catching in his throat. "I . . . I'm not . . ."

"You need to feed, don't you?" Sakura asked, leaning forward slightly. Her lips slipped into a slight pout, as they'd done whenever the Other had been hurt and tried to keep it a secret.

"Yes, but . . ." He swallowed thickly. Her scent wrapped around him like a cloak, stirring the ravenous predator within. For her to offer her blood . . . Surely the others would protest. Fai and Kurogane both. Surely Sakura had only offered out of some sense of obligation, or pity.

Surely, she couldn't mean it.

"Not here," he whispered, breaking eye contact. "Not now. Not you."

Sakura flinched, her hand releasing his and retreating to her lap. The sudden lack of connection made Syaoran shiver.

"I'm sorry," she whispered, standing up. Syaoran's heart shot up to his throat, and his hand lifted up to capture hers. Her arm went rigid at the contact, as it might have if some slimy animal had touched her.

Syaoran released her hand, a mix of panic and self-disgust forcing him to withdraw. "Sorry. I didn't mean it like that."

"How did you mean it?"

"I . . . I only meant . . . If I lost control of myself even once while I was near you . . ." He shook his head, as if doing so would expel the thought from his mind.

"I'm . . . important to you?" she asked, turning back to him. Her gaze was intense, curious.

He nodded, unable to say the words building at the back of his throat.

She sat down, legs folding awkwardly under her. When her leg brace scraped against the floor, she winced. He reached toward her reflexively, then pulled back, unsure how to alleviate the pain. She smiled apologetically. "Don't worry about that. It just gets a little sore after sword practice."

He thought of the metal bolt sitting in his pocket and gulped. "It . . . It looks like you got it fixed . . . after Cirrus."

She nodded, tracing the steel joint. "We fell into a world where everything was powered by steam, and this nice mechanist fixed it up for me. It's more stable now, and the quality of the steel is better."

"That's good."

"Yes." Sakura's smile softened, and Syaoran's heart thumped. He'd waited so long to see her smile like that. Today, he'd seen so many, he couldn't process them all.

He didn't mind. Overdosing on her happiness wasn't such a bad way to go.

Sakura spoke again. "Kurogane-san says I'm a lot better than I used to be. He only corrects my stances once every few minutes now, when we work. Fai-san is proud of me, too, though I think he gets lonely because I'm always busy practicing."

Syaoran nodded.

"It's been tough," Sakura said. Her smile dimmed, but didn't disappear. "In the beginning, I was sore all the time, and I thought I'd never be good at it. But I . . . I wanted to learn it because you asked me to, the day you left . . . It was all I had left of you."

"Sakura . . ."

Her stern gaze silenced him. "That day, you didn't call me Princess, or even Sakura-chan. You just called me Sakura. As if we were . . ." She trailed off, leaving Syaoran dumbstruck. I didn't realize, he thought. I didn't even realize I'd started calling her Sakura. The Other used to have such a hard time doing that . . .

"Do you want me to stop calling you that?" he asked, struggling to weed out the pain in his voice.

"No! I . . . I just wanted you to know . . . I'm grateful, for all you did for me. You gave me a reason to keep fighting. I would've died in the canyon if you hadn't pushed me to learn how to defend myself."

"I nearly killed you," he whispered. "And you're thanking me?"

"It does sound kind of silly, when you put it that way." Her fingers traced the back of his hand before closing around his palm. Her hand was warm, like sunshine.

For a while, they just sat there, relaxing. The steady ache in his body eventually became too much, and he laid down again.

"Are you tired?" Sakura asked, legs shifting as if to stand. "Should I go?"

"Will you stay?" he asked, knowing he had no right to ask.

She laid down beside him, still holding his hand. "I don't mind staying. I missed you, too."

He eased deeper into the straw mattress, body languid after being asleep so long. "How long has it been since we arrived here?" he asked, eyelids sliding shut without his permission.

"About three days. For two of them, we were sure you were paralyzed. Nothing below your waist would move at all. It wasn't until you rolled over in your sleep last night that we thought otherwise." Sakura's fingertips massaged the palm of his hand. Syaoran forced his eyelids open to see her face again.

"Three days, huh? Yet somehow, I'm still exhausted . . ."

"You should sleep," Sakura said. "Yukito-san always said healing takes a lot of energy."

Syaoran shook his head. His neck was stiff after days of apparent stillness. "I don't want to sleep."

"Why not?"

His lips curled into a bitter smile. "Because I'll have nightmares."

He heard the faint sound of surprise Sakura made, and went on to explain.

"I've been having nightmares for a long time now. Seishirou . . . Seishirou carried around a bottle of medicine to keep the dreams away, but he's gone now, so . . . I don't have them."

"Syaoran, you have to sleep."

He tried to shrug, then winced as the movement pulled at his broken body. Though the most critical injuries had healed, he ached all over. It would probably be another day before he was well enough to walk around, even longer before he could fight. "I don't need so much sleep . . ." he murmured. "I managed the nightmares well enough in Infinity." Not like I have to worry about sleepwalking in this condition anyway.

He felt a faint pressure on the side of his face and opened his eyes. Sakura's hand rested on his cheekbone, a feather-light touch after so long starving for her presence. If breathing hadn't pained him enough already, the sudden swelling he felt in his chest would've done it. His breath quavered with each lungful of air. "Sakura . . ."

"There's nothing you have to be afraid of," Sakura whispered. "We're all here, and we're all safe. You can rest."

His eyelids slid shut again. This time, he couldn't find the will to open them. "Will you stay here? Until I fall asleep?"

There was no hesitation in her answer. "Yes."

"Thank you."

Sakura's hand wound around his, and he allowed himself to drift off. It was only minutes before he was dreaming again.