Disclaimer: I do not own any characters, scenery, or towns; Square Enix does.
40 – Hidden Motives
Sephiroth woke and stretched from head to toe. He lay still for a moment and enjoyed the distant sound of the ocean. The visual beauty of the water might escape him but the audio did not. It was soothing and he could easily lose himself in it.
With a wistful sigh, the silver sat up and took in his vacant surroundings. Where are they, he thought, grabbing his PHS off the small end table. He couldn't remember exactly when he'd gone to sleep but it was around 12:00 – 13:00 hundred hours. It was now a little past 18:00 hundred so he'd slept for about five or six hours. Genesis had left before he'd fallen asleep and he couldn't picture Reno sitting still or being quiet unless he was working. Had the pair stayed outside so as not to disturb him or was something wrong? He was usually a light sleeper but he hadn't slept in so long that he'd probably fallen into a much deeper sleep. It was entirely possible that things that would normally wake him wouldn't have, like a fight caused by unexpected visitors.
Worried, Sephiroth stood, put his boots on, shoved his PHS in his pocket, and grabbed his sword harness, strapping it on as he headed for the door. The sun didn't set until after 20:00 hundred hours this time of year and he closed his eyes against the bright light, wondering where the pair might be. He knew they weren't in the detached bathroom because he would have heard them by now but he doubted that they would stay out in the sun for five or six hours, which narrowed the options considerably. After a few more seconds of thought, he headed toward a large cluster of boulders by the ocean. The tide didn't come in that far and some of the rocks were large enough that they would provide shade.
Moving quickly, the silver had gone a third of the way to the boulders when he heard laughter. He changed his course slightly and picked up the pace. Less than five minutes later, he stood on the shore around 500 feet from the boulders and perhaps 20 feet from Genesis. As soon as he stopped, the auburn turned toward him with a dazzling smile and gestured toward the ocean. Gaze following the STC's hand he spotted Reno standing motionless, knee deep in the water with a makeshift spear.
"Is he fishing?" Sephiroth asked, surprised. The Turk stood in a small inlet surrounded on three sides by water. He knew from experience that small to medium sized fish could usually be found there; however, he wasn't certain if they swam in for a rest, to avoid larger predators, or if they simply came in with the tide and were trapped when it went back out.
"Yes. He's managed to catch an impressive number of fish even though there's been a considerable amount of floundering involved."
As the silver watched the Turk suddenly sprang into motion, quickly moving forward and throwing the spear into the water at an angle. A few seconds later he retrieved the spear, lifted it out of the water, and removed the fish unlucky enough to have been run through. He turned to toss the fish on the shore but as soon as he spotted Sephiroth, he headed toward land instead.
"If you were hungry you should have returned to the hut," the silver called as Reno dropped the fish onto a pile he'd overlooked. There appeared to be 10-15 decent sized fish waiting to be cleaned. "Impressive."
"Thanks and where's the fun in just goin' in and gettin' food yo?" the Turk replied, coming to a stop next to Genesis.
"You wouldn't have gotten soaking wet."
"Meh, I don't mind. Do need to wash the salt off before it dries and starts ta itchin' though. Figure I can do that while you two gut 'em."
"Us?" the auburn exclaimed.
"Of course," grinned Reno.
"Well… I suppose you did catch them. What do you say Sephiroth, care to help me clean them?"
"That is acceptable. Where did you learn to fish like that anyway?"
"Part of bein' a Turk. Never know when yer gonna get stranded in the middle of Gaia knows where with zero provisions."
The silver nodded. "SOLDIERs learn similar skills."
"I thought you said there was no Turk school," stated Genesis.
"There really ain't but we do pick up a few things and get a couple a books."
"Weird."
"Heh. Hey, I saw some firewood behind the hut. Ya mind if we cook 'em outside? Nothing like fresh fish cooked over an open flame yo."
"I don't mind," the SSC replied.
"Mmm, sounds good," grinned the auburn. A split second of concern showed on the Turk's face before he simply nodded and headed toward the detached bathroom. Wonder what that was about? Genesis turned to Sephiroth with a sigh. "Guess it's up to us then."
"It would seem so. Wait here a moment."
Before the STC could even arch an eyebrow the silver was gone. Though he knew he wouldn't find him, he instinctively spun, wondering where the man had gotten too. So that's how Reno feels. The thought had barely crossed his mind before Sephiroth was back, holding a woven basket. In that instant he decided Reno was right to be flipped out. It was unsettling having someone be there one second and gone the next and it was even worse when they simply popped up out of nowhere. He made a mental note to be more conscious of his speed around unenhanced individuals as he trailed the SSC to the pile of fish. Once there he bent and helped the man toss the unfortunate critters into the basket.
"How are you feeling?" the silver asked.
"Physically or mentally?"
"Both."
"My muscles are a bit tight and tired, like I've worked out but didn't stretch before or after. Mentally… I'm exhausted," Genesis admitted. "Part of the time my thoughts are moving so fast I can't keep up with them and the rest of the time they're sluggish or my mind goes blank altogether. I'm used to being able to control my thoughts, not having them run amuck or worse, control me."
"I'm sure it will get better."
"I hope so," the STC replied, throwing the last fish into the basket and standing. "What about the flashbacks?" he asked quietly.
"You're having flashbacks?" Genesis nodded. "Why didn't you say anything?"
"I just did, didn't I?" Had he not been comfortable with Sephiroth the look he received would have stopped him in his tracks. "Don't get all bent out of shape. They're a new development, okay?"
"How new?"
"I had one not too long after you went to sleep. Since then I've had… mini flashes. Actually flashes is probably too strong of a word. More like flickers. They go by so fast that I can't tell what they're of."
"I see," Sephiroth replied. What the auburn was describing made sense. His mind was warring with itself. On one hand, it wanted to fill in the blanks but on the other, it feared the outcome. Simply put Genesis's mind was trying to decide if repressing or remembrance was the better option. "Have you told Reno?"
"No but he knows. Before the flickers started I had a full-blown flashback that led to a little breakdown. Reno was with me and since then he's been watching me like a predator watches its prey, even if he doesn't act like it."
"He's concerned."
"I know. I didn't say I was angry Sephiroth." Genesis smiled before adding, "At least not yet. Besides, in a way I'm doing the same thing he is."
"What do you mean?"
"Ever since our conversation the other day where Reno walked out of the hut I've caught myself watching him, and not just because he's sexy." The silver gave him a puzzled look and he added, "Do you remember what he said right before he walked out the door?"
"'It's not a question of bein' fragile. Even the strongest people can be destroyed by somethin' like this.'"
"Good memory," Genesis smirked, not surprised by the word for word recount. "Obviously this meant being kidnapped and probably tortured and he wasn't talking about people, he was talking about himself. Like you said, he probably has unresolved issues and given the word choice it makes me wonder just how close he came to being destroyed and how well he's actually handling it."
"Well enough to return to active duty."
"Oh come on, that doesn't mean a Gaia-damned thing," the auburn snipped.
"It doesn't?"
"No. Turks aren't favored like SOLDIERs. Shinra doesn't give a damn if one of them is hurt, physically or mentally, so long as they're capable of doing their job."
"I see your point but I get the impression Tseng cares."
"True, but Reno's very good at hiding things. Besides, Tseng just became Director and Reno didn't get alone with Veld, the previous Director."
"To the extent that Veld would harm one of his employees?" asked Sephiroth.
"I'm honestly not sure," Genesis sighed. "He's not talked to me about it in detail however the impression I was left with is that there was no love lost between the two. Veld might well have not given a damn if Reno was injured."
"Yet Reno stayed a Turk?"
"In case you haven't been able to tell loyalty means a great deal to Reno. In that regard one can liken him to an abused dog. It doesn't matter how many times he's been hit and kicked, he'll keep returning to his abusive owner with unconditional love. He might wonder why he's abused but he's more likely to assume it's his fault and accept the blows without question and if someone should attack his owner he would savagely attack the attacker."
"I find that disturbing. It's irrational that anyone would help, let alone protect, someone who has treated them poorly."
"People aren't always rational Sephiroth. You aren't always rational."
The silver's jaw moved a centimeter before he stopped it. Genesis was right: he wasn't always rational. Rational meant that a person used reason, sound judgment, and good sense to make decisions. Getting involved in the Turk Desertion had not been rational, let alone the current situation. Sure things had worked out fairly well before but this situation was on an entirely different level. Before, he'd been able to downplay his involvement through rational, however that was unlikely to be the case this time. No matter how he looked at it, he'd pitted himself against Hojo with Genesis and Reno knowing how much power the man had within SEPC. It wouldn't matter how rational his argument was, in the end he was likely to lose. "Are you afraid Reno's going to fall apart?" he finally asked, directing the conversation back into a more comfortable area.
"No, that's not it. It's true I'm concerned but he's strong Sephiroth. So strong that he can handle things that would drive many others mad. The reason I've been watching him is that I feel like he wants to talk but stops the words just before they come out. I guess what it comes down to is that I want to help him, to be there for him whenever he can't stop the words."
"Perhaps he wishes to talk to you about it because you can now, unfortunately, relate to each other in that regard."
"That's part of it but ya hit the nail sideways yo."
During their discussion, Genesis and Sephiroth had begun moving toward the hut. Now, less than 15 feet from the door they froze. A heartbeat later the Turk rounded a corner. As he stopped, a grin spread across his face.
"Ya should see yer faces," the Turk chuckled. The pair looked like teenage girls caught cheating on their boyfriends: a mixture of shock, indignation, guilt, and concern.
"So hit the nail on the head for us," snapped Genesis, guilt transforming into anger. It didn't matter how much the redhead had heard, it was enough for him to know he was the topic of choice.
Reno took a deep breath and blew it out slowly before answering. "Until the other day I didn't realize how terrified of Fuhito I was. Now all I can think about is what would happen if my fear overcomes and paralyzes me at a critical moment."
"You'll either die or be captured," stated Sephiroth matter-of-factually.
"Heh, thank you Mr. Obvious," the redhead said sarcastically, causing the silver to blush in embarrassment. "Sorry. Mouth got the better of me." The SSC nodded without looking at him. "I'd kill myself before I allowed Fuhito ta get his hands on me again. Even told him that on Mt. Coral. Just one problem: I don't wanna die."
Words spilled out of Genesis's mouth before he even realized it. "Yet you risked dying to possibly save me."
"Offing oneself for love is romantic as hell yo."
"Be serious Reno!"
"I am bein' serious! Dying for a friend or loved one, hell even at the hands of an honorable opponent is one thing, but Fuhito ain't any of those. I can't stand the thought that the fucker might best me. Worse, I really didn't realize how fucking terrified I was of him until Mt. Coral. Guess the saying 'out of sight, out of mind' is true." Genesis started to speak but the redhead held up a hand. "Let me finish. On top of all of the above I hate myself for being a sniveling, selfish, childish bastard by focusing on my problems and not yours and how the hell do you always do that?"
"Do what?"
"Deflect discussion's away from yourself."
"I didn't deflect anything," Genesis defensively replied.
"That's not entirely true," interjected Sephiroth.
"What?"
"We were talking about your flashbacks and flickers yet somehow ended up discussing Reno."
"We, but, I… Godsdamnit I didn't do it on purpose!"
"I did not imply you did, merely pointed out that whether intentional or not you diverted the conversation away from yourself."
"What do you want to know?" Genesis growled.
"Gen… I'm sorry. I deflected and answered my own question," replied Reno, inwardly cursing himself. "I always thought you intentionally shifted the focus away from you but now I realize you don't. Hell I just did it and didn't realize it until I'd done it."
"It doesn't matter. Intentionally or not you're right. I do steer conversations away from myself." Genesis sighed, then added, "Weren't we just talking about this? About how I keep everyone at arm's length and need to change?"
"Yeah but changing takes time Gen."
"Maybe so but one has to start somewhere. So again I ask what do you want to know?"
"Do you have a knife?"
Reno and Genesis exchanged confused glances before turning their gaze on Sephiroth. The STC arched an eyebrow, saying, "No, I don't. What else would you like to know?"
"The hell do ya need a knife for yo?"
"To prepare dinner," Sephiroth replied, slightly raising the basket of fish he still held.
"You turnin' into me? Seriously, where the hell did that come from? We're havin' a serious discussion and you're thinking about food."
"Perhaps you're rubbing off on me. Regardless this needs to get started and I'm perfectly capable of carrying on a conversation while I work."
"Alright, alright," Reno sighed, reaching behind his back and retrieving a thin knife with a non-serrated blade.
"Did you just pull that out of your ass?" Genesis laughed as the Turk handed the knife over, hilt first. The redhead chuckled, turned, and lifted his shirt up. Sitting in the crook of the man's back was a black pouch that looked similar to a gun holster in size and shape, except it had three distinct pockets. One pocket was empty but two more knife hilts stuck out of the others.
"I learned my lesson during the Desertion," the Turk replied, lowering his shirt and facing his companions. During that time he'd found himself stranded in the wilderness with nothing but his EMR, which was great for beating and electrocuting things but not so great for cutting and skinning. The only thing that had saved his ass, and perhaps Genesis's, was Legend's care package. The two probably could have made do but why put himself in that position again? Always be prepared was one of Tseng's mottos and it had finally sunk in.
Genesis plopped into the sand as Sephiroth darted behind the hut. He returned with a flat slab of wood as big as a table leaf. Had the piece not been at least three inches thick the auburn might have believed it was just that. As he watched the silver dropped the wood into the sand, placed a piece of fish onto the scarred surface and got to work.
His friends having made their statement Reno sighed and lowered himself onto the ground. It was good that the mood was lighter and he didn't mind being outside, but he still felt like a jerk. He was trying to think up a good topic when the auburn spoke.
"I'm still waiting."
"Can we not do this Gen?"
"Do what?"
"You know what," Reno replied, not wishing to fight. He also didn't want the auburn to later say he'd been cornered into sharing.
"I understand you weren't and aren't pressing for information but I'm as willing to talk right now as I'm going to be. Just go with it, okay? When I've had enough I'll tell you."
"Fine, I know you grew up in Banora, that you were sick a lot, didn't get along with most people, including your parents, were deprived of sweets, and joined SOLDIER when you were 14. I'd appreciate it if you filled in some of the blanks yo."
The auburn nodded as his mind spun, trying to decide on a topic. His concentration was broken as Reno began fidgeting out of the corner of his eye. It wasn't until he noticed three cleaned fish sitting on the board that he realized he'd been silent for much longer than he thought. "My illnesses were the result of a weak immune system, or so I was told."
"Or so you were told?" Sephiroth inquired. "You didn't believe them?"
Genesis shrugged. "I always wondered if it was a convenient way for them to say 'we don't know what's wrong with you but obviously something is.' I just felt like they weren't telling me everything." The silver nodded and he continued. "I was constantly ill from infections: respiratory, sinus, blood, ear. You name it I probably had it. I also had chronic bronchitis which often led to pneumonia and other bacterial infections not to mention asthma."
"That's rough," Reno said, shaking his head.
The auburn shrugged. "It may sound strange but it wasn't as bad as it sounds. Sick or not I was always a loner and when I wanted company I had Angeal."
"When did you two meet?" inquired Sephiroth.
"I'm not sure but I've known him for as long as I can remember. Some of my earliest memories are of us playing at one of our houses or out in the orchards. He never minded that I was a weak, scrawny, little sick kid nor did his mother mind that we hung out like some of the others."
"Ya mean parents wouldn't let their kids play with ya?"
Genesis sniggered. "A lot of adults treated me like I had some horrific, highly contagious disease and they didn't want their kids anywhere near me."
"What about school yo?"
"Even when I wasn't sick I was still too weak to go but my parents did try to send me once. The first day I came home in tears and refused to go back. The next day they drug me there, telling me it was for my own good, that I'd get used to it and maybe make some new friends. I toughed it out until recess then I took off. My parents, some of their friends, and Angeal and his Mom looked for me but I was very good at hiding. Two days later I was hungry and sick enough to drag myself home and beg my parents for forgiveness. After that I had tutors. Even when I got better they didn't push the issue."
"Obviously you got better since you wouldn't have been admitted into SOLIDER otherwise," stated Sephiroth.
"You're right. Around 10 or 11 I just suddenly stopped getting sick."
"Ya think things woulda been different without discriminating parents?" Reno asked, getting back on track.
"Hard to say but I doubt it. There were other things that made me different."
"Like what?" Sephiroth asked.
"For starters there was my parents wealth. Instead of being the little sick kid, I probably would have been the little rich bitch. Aside from that, I wasn't interested in things most kids are. Even when I was healthy I wasn't fond of sports nor did I enjoy camping or fishing. Hell, I generally wasn't fond of anything one does in a village like Banora. Don't get me wrong, I liked to explore on occasion and what not but I would have rather read or played a board game."
Genesis paused and watched as Sephiroth cleaned the last fish. The silver's movements were quick and precise, making it clear he wasn't a stranger to the task. As the man placed the piece next to the others, the auburn's gaze traveled to Reno. The Turk sat with his right leg stretched out and his left pulled in toward his chest. His left arm was wrapped around his bent leg, his chin was resting on his left knee, and he was idly running the fingers of his right hand through the sand. Aside from his furrowed brow the redhead looked serene. "You look like you want to know something."
"I, eh…" the Turk trailed off, eyes darting to the silver.
"Would you like me to leave?" asked the SSC.
"No," Genesis said, waving the question off. "If I don't like whatever it is I'll say so, so go ahead Reno."
"A while back you implied yer parents forced you to join SOLDIER. I guess I'm not connecting the dots. I mean, ya don't talk like ya hate 'em or like they hate you, just that ya didn't get along."
"Before I get into that you have to understand something. My parents would have been better off with a thoroughbred Chocobo than a child. In fact half the time I felt like they treated me like one."
"They fed ya greens and kept ya in the stable?"
Genesis chuckled at the mock horror on Reno's face. "Of course not, but they primped and groomed me like one. Really they wanted nothing to do with me unless we had company, then I was required to play music and otherwise be charming so as to impress whoever was in attendance. In turn, those people would fawn over me and heap compliments and attention onto my parents, which was of course the point to the whole charade. Aside from that, they didn't do much more than feed me. We never really bonded or anything. In fact I always got the impression they went out of their way not to get to close to me."
"That sounds eerily familiar yo," said Reno, thinking of his own parents disinterest in him.
"Doesn't it?" the auburn replied, smiling bitterly. "Anyway, I complied with my parents wishes for years but once I stopped getting sick all the time things changed. Basically what it came down to was that I was tired of being their little pet."
"How'd they take that?" Sephiroth asked.
"Not well but they finally got the message. After a few incidents in which they forced me to attend parties I no longer wished to attend, I made it clear I was no longer going to perform like a trained dog."
"How?"
"My mother wanted me to play violin at one of the gatherings. When I refused she grabbed my arm, shoved it at me, and viciously whispered that if I knew what was good for me I'd do it. I took the instrument and went through tuning and warm-up, glaring at her the entire time. When I was finished I held my bow up, ready to go, but instead I lifted my chin, straightened my head, and let the damned thing crash onto the hardwood floor. It didn't survive the incident."
"Heh, bet that went over well."
"As well as one winged bat," Genesis chuckled. "My mother made some excuse about how I wasn't feeling well and ushered me to my room, all the while hissing that I was an ingrate, among other things."
"Did they punish you?" questioned Sephiroth.
"They tried."
"Tried?"
"No matter what I did they were never violent, never even gave me so much as a bruise. In fact they were very careful not too. About all they ever did was isolate me in my room, which of course didn't work because I'd just sneak out knowing full well they wouldn't do anything to me." Genesis paused, shaking his head with a faint smile. "Anyway that was the beginning of the end."
"What do ya mean?"
"Before the violin incident we mostly left each other alone. We lived in a peaceful harmony created by ignoring each other, like ships passing in the night. After the incident we still mostly ignored each other but the atmosphere in the house became tense. My mom, ever the attention whore, started crying on friends shoulders about how disrespectful I was and how I acted like I was above them. Suddenly my parents thought I was a problem child and that my actions were my way of crying out for attention. They signed me up for kendo, saying it would give me an outlet for my rebellion or whatever I was going though. It actually did help and enjoyed the lessons. So much so I ended up studying koryū, iaidō, kenjutsu, and other techniques."
"That doesn't sound so bad yo."
"At first it wasn't but then they suddenly decided that the only way to really correct my rebellion was to start controlling my every action. Before I'd spent most of my time in my room and all the sudden I had to eat breakfast, lunch, and dinner with them. Worse, I couldn't leave the table unless I was excused. If I went out they had to know where I'd be every second and I'd be asked to recount what I'd done when I returned. Stupid things like that."
"Did ya actually do any of that?"
"At first I went with it but I got sick of it pretty quickly and then they brought in a psychiatrist."
"A psychiatrist?" Reno exclaimed in disbelief. "That's a bit extreme."
"That's what I thought but apparently they didn't see it that way. The son of a bitch followed me everywhere for like a week, and then he convinced my parents that I was emotionally disturbed and was suppressing an unhealthy amount of rage. Next thing I knew they were trying to feed me pills and when that didn't work they started using liquids, pouring it into my drink. It didn't take me long to catch on and I stopped drinking anything that wasn't in a glass bottle with a metal lid that I didn't break the seal on. When they began holding me down and giving me injections I gave up and went back to the pills."
"Did you actually take 'em?"
"In the beginning I had to because they checked my mouth. As soon as they trusted me enough to stop checking I stopped taking."
"I can't believe they did that," the Turk said, shaking his head and stretching out his cramped left leg.
"I put up with it for as long as I could. The last straw was when they started to deny me access to my own money."
"Ya mean money ya saved up from allowances or somethin'?"
"No, it was money I earned on my own through a… business venture."
"A business venture? Eh, how old were you yo?"
"Around twelve." The redhead's eyebrows rose in surprise. "A story for a different time." It was clear Reno was curious but he merely nodded and motioned for him to continue. "Anyway, around then I decided to get the hell out of Banora and away from my parents. I started contemplating where to go and what to do. Since I hadn't been sick in years, loved handling a sword, and Shinra was located in a city far from Banora, the SOLDIER program was a natural fit." Of course there were a few other reasons, namely Sephiroth, but Genesis saw no need to confess that.
"So yer parents didn't physically force you into SOLDIER, yer decision was a result of their actions."
"Yes. In fact they went nuts when I told them and tried to keep me from joining."
"Seriously? I know SOLDIERs got a high mortality rate and all but since yer parents thought you were lacking in discipline or something you think they'd have been cool with it. If nothing else the program woulda squashed yer supposed rebellion," Reno said.
"That's rather what I thought as well, but obviously they thought differently. The day after I told them they fired the psychiatrist and let me have access to my funds. Even their behavior did a 180. Instead of hovering, they gave me space, no longer asked for a play-by-play of my day, and tried to be pleasant. I could tell it was all an act though. At first I thought it was the death factor but toward the end I changed my mind."
"Why?" Sephiroth asked.
"As I was walking out the door my mother hissed at me, saying that when I got rejected from the program to not come crawling back to their door, that I was on my on regardless of circumstance. It wasn't what she said, but the fact that she said it with such surety, as if she knew I would be rejected. I brushed it off but later Angeal asked to borrow my PHS so he could call his mother and tell her we were accepted. I overheard the call and even she was shocked I'd gotten in. I could hear it in her voice."
"Did she give any indication as to why?"
"Unfortunately no and I didn't want to ask 'Geal since I wasn't supposed to have heard the conversation in the first place. That leaves my parents, and there's no way that's happening."
"What about Angeal? Perhaps it wasn't that he hoped you'd fail the blood test for SOLDIER, but rather he expected you too," the SSC said.
Genesis cocked his head sideways in thought. "I don't think so. 'Geal isn't very good at hiding things from me. For that matter he's not very good at keeping things from anyone. It's just not in his nature. Regardless, I don't suppose it's entirely impossible."
Even as the auburn said the words, he was adamantly denying them in his mind. It wasn't that it couldn't be possible; it was that he didn't want to entertain the notion. The thought itself had caused a slight seed of suspicion that possibly 'Geal knew something. It was bad enough that he would likely be more guarded when it came to his friend, whether intentionally or not.
The auburn knew he was probably being paranoid but he couldn't help it. He'd often felt that his parents actively hid things from him and it wasn't a far stretch to believe 'Geal might know something as well. His suspicion had been caused by seemingly unimportant comments from his parents such as 'we can't except anything more given the circumstances' and 'we're just lucky things didn't turn out worse.' His parents had also watched him closely and would overreact to the slightest thing, like hiring a shrink for minor rebellion. For years he'd told himself it was because of his health, or lack thereof, but not all of it could be explained away. Frankly he'd felt as though they were always expecting something terrible to happen either to him or because of him.
Genesis's blood went cold as another thought struck him. Was it possible that Angeal had ulterior motives in becoming his self-appointed protector? Perhaps Gillian, Angeal's mother, knew something as well and had the same worries that his parents expressed when they thought he wasn't listening. If his parents, and perhaps Gillian, truly knew or believed something terrible about him, was it possible Angeal had befriended him so that he could keep an eye on him? 'Geal, a spy! Perhaps in the beginning 'Geal's true intentions hadn't had anything to do with friendship at all, but over time the relationship had gone that way anyway. After all, even a spy could become friends with their target. Absurd. Or was it?
His parents and Gillian had been fairly close and Angeal had often been allowed to stay with him when he'd been sick. As they'd gotten older, the pair had even been left alone, regardless of whether he was ill or not. If Gillian had even remotely suspected there was anything wrong with him, he couldn't picture her letting her only child stay with him without good reason. Friendship was a good reason but if she did suspect something, wasn't it logical to conclude she may have told Angeal to be on guard for certain things? No one would leave a child alone with a possibly dangerous person without warning them right? As for the rest, perhaps Angeal hadn't been his protector, but the village protector. If he started acting oddly or something Angeal could have easily overpowered him or gotten help.
Genesis shook his head, scattering his thoughts. Everything in his mind was nothing more than speculation. Worse, it was detrimental speculation. The only way he was going to get answers was to confront Angeal face-to-face and even then he wasn't guaranteed to get answers. Was confrontation truly necessary? Even if Angeal had started out with ulterior motives, he believed they really had become friends. If his friend still had ulterior motives, well it still didn't change anything. That being the case what would confrontation achieve aside from destroying a good friendship and throwing his entire past into question? It didn't really seem worth it. Besides, if he really was a danger to others it wasn't such a bad thing to have someone between himself and others. When he looked at it that way, Angeal wasn't that much different from Reno and Sephiroth. It was true that they were on his side and trying to help him but they were also concerned about innocent bystanders that might get caught in the crossfire or in front of him on a bad day.
"You in there yo?"
"What?" Genesis blinked slowly and focused his gaze on the redhead, who blinked back. "Sorry, I obviously got lost in thought."
"About what?"
"Crispy people."
"Eh, what?"
"I was thinking that you two aren't just protecting me, you're protecting anyone I might lose control on or around, thereby turning them into crispy critters. On that disturbing note can we call it quits for now?"
"Sure thing yo." The silver nodded agreement and he added, "Why don't ya go clean up a bit? Me and Gen can take care of the rest."
"Very well. There is a fire pit out back and skewers in the kitchen."
"I'll get the skewers," Genesis said, standing and brushing off his pants.
"Heh, sure you don't wanna start the fire? Ya don't even need a lighter or anything after all," Reno chuckled, earning a glare from the auburn. "Mmm, yer annoyed face is as sexy as ever." He laughed as Genesis groaned and Sephiroth smirked.
"You're hopeless," the STC called over his shoulder as he headed toward the hut.
"I know," Reno shot back, falling into step beside Sephiroth. It didn't take long for the pair to round the hut. While the silver continued straight toward the detached bathroom, the Turk veered to the left, zeroing in on the woodpile. He got what he needed, placed it into the fire pit, and got a small fire going, adding wood as needed.
"Boo."
"Shiva's Tits!" Reno yelped, six feet from where he'd been squatting down. At least he'd scuttled backward like a demented crab instead of shitting himself.
"Sorry."
"Oh ya look real sorry!" the Turk muttered, frowning up at Genesis. The auburn placed the wooden slab that held the fish onto the ground. It now held skewers as well.
"It's your fault you know," the STC grinned.
"My fault? I'm an innocent victim here!"
"Hmm, victim maybe, but innocent? Hardly. You even made me break a promise to myself."
"What promise?"
"I told myself I'd be more cautious of my speed around you so as not to startle you. Thanks to your earlier teasing that lasted less than half a day."
"Teasing? Wha- oh, you mean callin' yer annoyed face sexy?"
"Precisely."
"That wasn't teasin', that was truth," Reno chuckled, crawling toward the fire pit.
"Is that so?" replied Genesis, dropping onto his hands and knees in front of the Turk.
With the auburn's face suddenly inches from his own Reno gently pressed his lips against the man's soft petals. Without hesitation Genesis pressed back, causing his lips to tingle. Happiness, pleasure, and relief flooded him, making his heart race and his eyes sting. For the first time he acknowledged that mere days ago he'd fully expected to lose the STC. His brazen, half-cocked scheme had truly been born from desperation and the knowledge that he was losing someone he loved. There were few others, perhaps two or three, whom he would go so far for. He'd long ago stopped questioning and wondering how the auburn had become so important to him in such a short amount of time. He wasn't afraid of the answers; rather the answers didn't matter. Once again the phrase 'it is what it is' was the best way he could describe how he felt.
Genesis's heart sped up as he melted into Reno. Since waking his mind had been a flurry of activity but now it went silent. Instead of chaos, anger, and confusion, peace reined. The fact that one person seemed to have such an effect on him was somewhat disconcerting, yet he also knew he had no desire to fight or change it.
"Are you two that hungry?"
"Hmm?" the auburn purred, pulling back from Reno. "Hungry?"
"From a distance it looks as though you are attempting to devour each other," chuckled Sephiroth.
"Damn Seph, you have lousy timing," the Turk grumbled, dropping his forehead onto Genesis's shoulder.
"Perhaps it isn't me, but you two. Would you like me to leave you be for awhile?" Sephiroth smirked.
"Weelll…."
"Certainly not!" proclaimed Genesis, using his left hand to smack the redhead on the back of the head.
"You sayin' you want him to join us yo?"
"Reno!"
"Spoil sport."
"Whom are you referring to?" Sephiroth queried, kneeling and skewering the fish. The auburn quickly joined him.
"Heh, both of ya."
Genesis grinned as the silver blushed and Reno stretched his legs out in the now vacated space in front of him. Though he was amused, the auburn was choking on questions he wanted to ask the redhead. More than once the Turk had made comments about being intimate with Sephiroth, about both of them being with the man. The comments didn't bother him but he was unsure if the man was serious or not. The silver seemed to take the comments as a joke, but what if they weren't? He knew Reno found Sephiroth attractive, as did he, so it wasn't hard to imagine the Turk might really wish to have a threesome. If that was the case what kind of threesome was the redhead thinking about? Was it a 'let's have sex together sometimes' threesome or something more complicated, like all of them dating or something.
While Genesis was dying of curiosity he held his tongue. Number one: it wasn't a conversation he wanted to have in front of Sephiroth. Number two: he was uncertain of his own feelings on the matter. If he asked Reno and the man said he really did want to sleep with Sephiroth, well he wasn't sure how he felt about that, let alone what it meant. Did it mean the redhead wasn't content with just him? That he really wasn't good enough, or just wasn't enough, for him? These were questions only Reno could answer and the answers depended on his willingness to go along with whatever the redhead might have in mind. Until he had his answers and could make a more informed decision, all he could do was organize his questions and wait.
"Hand me some fish." The auburn grabbed six fish by the skewer and turned. It was awkward but Reno managed to take the fish without dropping any in the sand. "Thanks," he said, stabbing the skewers into the sand at an angle so that the fish was close enough to the fire to cook, but far enough away so as not to burn. "Won't take too long yo."
"Would you like something to go with it?" Sephiroth asked.
"You know I ain't gonna complain."
"Nor will I."
"Pasta salad or rice?"
"What kind a pasta salad?" Reno asked, sounding somewhat suspicious.
"Something cold, perhaps a simple vinaigrette with broccoli, carrots, sweet peppers, mushrooms, and black olives."
"Mmm, that sounds good," said Genesis.
"I'm game yo."
"Very well. I will prepare it," the silver said, standing.
"Anything I can do to help?" the auburn inquired. Sephiroth shook his head. "You're such a control freak," he chuckled.
"True, but that is not the issue. Most of the work is cutting and the kitchen is rather small."
"No worries. I'll stay here and make sure Reno doesn't eat all of the fish."
"Pfft. You don't wanna get in between me and food yo."
"No doubt," laughed the auburn.
"There's plenty of food in the kitchen if he goes on a frenzy."
"At least we won't starve."
"There ya go pickin' on me again."
"It is amusing," Sephiroth grinned before disappearing around the corner.
"Heh, we're a triangle of amusement."
"Excuse me?" asked Genesis.
"He amuses you, I amuse him, and ya both amuse me."
"When you look at it that way I guess you're right. By the way, thank you for giving him a chance. I know two didn't exactly hit it off."
"No need to thank me. Us not gettin' along at first was my fault yo."
"It takes a big person to admit error."
"I don't think I'm a big person but I don't have much problem fessing up when I'm in the wrong," Reno replied, removing the now cooked fish and replacing them with a fresh batch.
"Well regardless of how you look at it, I think that makes you a big person."
"Heh, yer entitled to yer thoughts," grinned the Turk.
The STC could tell the Turk was somewhat uncomfortable. What he couldn't tell was why. Perhaps he's not comfortable with complements? He decided to change the topic. "Sssoooo, what did you two do while I was… gone?"
"Nothing really, just talked."
"I see. So that's why you two seem closer."
"Come again?"
"That explains why you two seem closer."
"Eh, not really. We mostly just speculated about what was wrong with you and what to do about it. There was some personal stuff but not much."
"Oh." The auburn thought for a moment, wording his next question carefully before speaking. "Why so little personal talk? Is it that you didn't want to get personal or that the conversation never went in that direction?"
"I can't speak for him but for me it was a little of both yo," Reno replied, placing the last of the fish next to the fire.
Genesis's curiosity started to get the better of him and he asked, "Do you want to get personal with him?"
"What kinda question is that?" the Turk asked, squinting suspiciously at the SOLDIER.
"A simple one."
"Sounds like a loaded one to me."
"Then why did you ask?" snapped the auburn.
"Yer clearly hinting at something."
"That is the point of a question."
"Godsdamnit Gen quit playin' word games and spit out the real question."
"What makes you think that wasn't the real question?" At Reno's chilling look he spat, "Do you want to sleep with him?"
The Turk's eyes widened in surprise. "Where'd that come from?" he asked, moving the last of the fish away from the fire.
"My mouth."
Reno narrowed his eyes and glared at the STC. Instead of the sharp retort on his tongue he asked, "I can't give you an answer."
"Why not?"
"I haven't really thought about it."
"Yet you seem to make references to it quite a bit."
"I do?" Immediately following the statement understanding dawned on the redhead. "I was just teasin' Gen!"
"Were you?"
"For Planet's Sake yes! Heh, now who's the jealous one yo?"
"I'm not jealous!"
"If you say so."
"I-" Genesis trailed off and deflated as his anger and annoyance drained away. "Maybe I was, am, jealous," he sighed. "You really haven't thought about it?"
"No, not really. Have you?"
"Sort of. I mean, I thought you had so I thought about it."
"Uh huh, and what did you decide?"
"Nothing. My decision hinged on yours."
"Which means you weren't completely opposed to it."
"I didn't say that!"
"True, but if you were totally against it yer answer wouldn't have depended on mine," Reno said, standing and picking up the large slab of wood that held the now cooked fish.
Genesis froze, realizing the Turk was right. Gods what a jackass he was! Whether he wanted to admit it or not, jealously had caused him to speak before he really thought things through. Suddenly he remembered the incident in which he'd almost kissed Sephiroth not long after Reno had left Midgar. That had been before the kidnapping incident. Damn, damn, damn! He'd been worried about the redhead wanting to put the moves on Sephiroth but he hadn't done anything physical. Unlike me.
"Relax," the redhead called, heading toward the corner of the hut. "I said I haven't thought about it, not that I'm opposed to the idea yo."
The auburn swore his jaw hit the sand as Reno rounded the corner and disappeared from sight. Two thoughts occurred to him simultaneously. One: If the Turk knew about the almost kiss he clearly wasn't rattled by it. Two: He'd just stated that sleeping with Sephiroth was open for discussion. Holy Minerva what did I just do? Thinking about it he wasn't certain whether his curiosity over the redhead's intentions had caused him to broach the subject or whether it was his own desire to bed the silver that had done it. Either way he'd all but verbally admitted he was willing. He felt sick to his stomach as he wondered what Reno must be thinking, let alone what he thought of him.
Confused and half in shock, Genesis managed to rise and head toward the front of the hut with feet that felt as though they were made of lead. Reno hadn't seemed upset and he'd even said he wasn't opposed to discussing the topic further but that didn't stop the fear that he had just damaged, or worse, destroyed his relationship with the man that had risked his own life to save him. The fact that Sephiroth had probably heard the conversation also ate at him. What did he think about all this? Only time, and talking, will tell, he thought, entering the hut and facing whatever awaited him.