Don't own Chuck
General Beckman was clearing out paper work that she had let slid while she was dealing with the mess in Los Vegas. But now that things were back to normal if normal could be used to describe what went on in her office. She had time now to wade back into the waters and she did this by sorting the reports one folder at a time.
"Knock, knock," said Roan as he stuck his head in her door. Diane looked like she was going to pull her hair out.
"Morning Roan. If you're here to raid my bar I'm sorry but you drank the last of my gin the last time you were here which was yesterday. I think I have some scope if you're desperate," she said as she looked up at him over a pile of after action folders.
"I was afraid you were going to offer me some Everclear. No, I thought I'd come by and see if you wanted to go out for dinner this evening. I was able to get us reservations at one of the most exclusive restaurants in the whole town."
"Really," said Diane as she looked back at him. "And what restaurant would that be? I could use a distraction after all these reports."
"It's called Chez Roan and I think you know the address. I happen to know the owner quite well and he's holding us a table for two."
"Really, from what I hear it's not that exclusive," said the General as she took her reading glasses off and sat them on her desk. "I don't know Roan I'm knee deep in kindergarten reports."
"Didn't you say you needed a distraction? Well here it is. The dress code is pretty relaxed you can come as you are or take it off at the door."
"In your dreams, I don't know Roan I'm trying to get caught up here. Didn't these idiots go to a university? I've got morons using text language in their reports. I swear the first person who uses an emoticon I'm going to drop kick into orbit."
"Some people would argue that text messaging speeds up communication by removing all the fluff our languages have imposed on us."
"No Roan don't try to justify it, it's just bad English. Imagine trying to read a book translated into text language. Take for instance I don't know… Conrad or Forster works for instance translated into text language. The beauty of the language would all be lost. Conrad said that words are like the palette of the writer and with each word he paints a picture for the reader."
"You sound like my high school English teacher asking me what I was writing. I told her it was the beginning of my bester seller but she didn't buy it and she still sent me to the office."
"What did you write that got you sent to office. She sounds a little prudish but that was the way things where back then."
"Well, it really wasn't what I wrote more like where I wrote it on the wall of my high school. I was just paying her a compliment but she didn't read it that way."
"Roan, you're incorrigible. I don't know what I'm going to do with you. I should take advantage of this lull. I just gave Chuck some time off so maybe we can actually spend some us time without Chuck showing up on the monitor. Okay I'll come over tonight but I expect to be wined and dined."
"Your wish is my command so Charles and Sarah are taking time off. Good for them all missions and no play make for very dull agent. Just look at Colonel shoot 'em up."
"You really should stop calling him that he doesn't like it."
"I know," said Roan as he smiled.
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In Alexandria the Honest Brokers and Sons office building called the city police in to report a break-in. Over the weekend a group of people posing as office cleaners broke into their building. They real cleaners came in to find they had already been logged in and out. The building security manager was called in who in turn called the local police in.
"Okay Mr. Smith," said the Detective as he took notes on his mini tablet. "Mr. Smith, how do you spell that?"
"S-M-Y-T-H-E," said the man as the detective corrected it. "Excuse me but you use tablets to take notes with. What happened to the little notepads in the movies?"
"Our Chief is trying to keep up with the times and this makes writing our reports easier when we're done. You don't have to interpret what you wrote and everyone's notes are available for all our colleagues to consult if there's any cross connections with different cases."
"It sounds like something out of a Sci-Fi flick but you want to know why we called you. Well we think we were broken into but as of right now my IT guy says none of our sensitive files were touched."
"Do you have any cash or valuable objects missing. I noticed some of your art work you've got hanging on the walls. Is any of that missing."
"We don't keep cash here… well there is a petty cash fund but it's not enough to mess with and as far as the art work goes they're all reproductions. They're just very good copies. We did that intentionally because we didn't want something like this to happen."
"I see so someone broke in but did what? You're telling me they didn't take anything?" Smythe nodded his head.
"That's what it seems like now. My first thoughts were about a disgruntled security guard we let go but we haven't let anyone off. The only person who's left was a Martin O'Hare but he moved back to Ireland."
"Do you have a current address on him? I can contact Interpol and have someone got interview him. Just because he's there doesn't mean he didn't give anyone you building security codes."
"That would be kind of hard. He's current location is plot 144 in the Kildare county parish church cemetery. He retired from us at seventy-four then moved back to his birthplace only to suffer a massive heart attack a week later. I know the plot number because I sent a floral arrangement from the company to his funeral. I got a nice card from his family and that's how I know what happened and where he was buried, which brings us back to square one."
"I guess it wouldn't hurt to verify the information there. But if he was seventy-five in all likelihood everything is on the up and up there. Maybe if you walk me through the building I can get a better idea of what happened. One quick thought did your IT guy check to see if these people took something. What if they didn't take but put. He should check to see if they install any viruses. You guys wouldn't have pissed off any environmental people that might use this for publicity?"
"No, not at all…" said Smythe. He saw the Detective's reaction. "You have to understand we are ecologically conscious here and most of those so-called tree huggers work through us to finance their operations."
"So reverse the scenario, maybe it was someone looking for dirt on one of your clients," said the Detective as he wrote on his tablet.
"No because no one accessed out database like I said before. This whole thing is a mystery to me. As we walk through the building I'll have Bob our IT guy look into that idea of yours about the virus," said Smythe. He took out his phone called Bob and told him what to do then he and the Detective went up floor by floor until they reached the server room on the top floor.
"Detective Derrick this is Bob our IT guy," said Smythe as the two shook hands. Bob were you able to do your magic for us?"
"I ran a Blood Hound program that snoops out malware and viruses. It didn't find anything but I did some data crunching and I found something odd in the digital video records. Each second corresponds to a byte that's recorded but because of movement and other things it's rare that the byte size is always the same. Sure at night no one is around but we recorded the false cleaners coming in but then suddenly the byte size became a constant. You know what means don't you?"
"That's kind of the reason we pay you so I don't have to guess," said Smythe but the Detective broke into the conversation.
"He's saying your security cam feed was tampered with. They probably put it on a loop to cover whatever it was that they were doing."
"Exactly," said Bob as he turned to Smythe. "You see that's the difference between real cop and rent-a-cop." Smythe gave him a look. "That's just a personal observation. Another detail I uncovered, I was able to pull off from our security logs that the alarm to the roof door was deactivated during the same timeframe."
"Then we need to go out on the roof and look around too. This is becoming stranger and stranger by the moment. You've got thieves who concocted this elaborate system to break in but didn't take anything only to do what? Go up on the roof? I'm missing something here."
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Back in Echo Park, Chuck wanted to leave right away but things just didn't work out that way. Chuck had to take care of Morgan issues first while Sarah and Sam worked through their mother daughter problems too. The only person who was chipper and required low maintenance was Bunny. As long as she was fed and her diaper changed she was a trooper.
"Okay Morgan we've put off leaving for a couple of days but that's it no more. So what is this about our covers being at risk of being blown?"
"It's Big Mike, I think he might be on to you. So you might want to put a little more face time around here before you go."
"Really, uhmm… Big Mike is onto us. I assume this us is me since you're telling me I need to put in more face time around here."
"That would be a safe assumption on your part. I don't know Chuck, Big Mike might look dull and brutish but under that rough exterior there's a diamond waiting to be polished and you are his wet stone."
"Morgan, you're crazy admit it you don't want me to go because I won't take you along. I understand but Morgan you've got a fiancée and I'm married with children. We're not back in the good old days… but in the good old days I couldn't have afforded a trip like this. Beside you'd have to fly and who's going to be rooting for the airplane? Or doesn't that sound familiar? I bet Big Mike doesn't even know I was gone."
"Of course he knows you were gone," said Morgan as he looked out his manager's window. "There he is if you don't believe me."
"You know what I think I will go ask him," said Chuck as he got up and went to the door. "We can settle this once and for all."
"Hold up Chuck, don't do anything that could get your cover blown here. He might not look it but the man has the mind of a steel trap," said Morgan as he hurried out behind him. "Big Mike… Big Mike tell Chuck..."
"Hold up I thought you told me that the Buy More policy was not to bother their worker when they were going on break?"
"I did what? When did I tell you that? I don't remember it."
"It was a couple of days ago but maybe it was only the assistant manager. Big Mike you remember seeing me and Morgan talking don't you."
"Of course, I do. It was as clear as day you were right over there in the manager's office. Morgan was behind his desk and you were sitting in front of it."
"How was that possible if Chuck wasn't here? He was on an off site installation," said Morgan as Chuck gave him a look.
"Morgan, son I don't doubt you or anything but I think you've got your dates confused. I remember Chuck being here and you two talking because that was the day your mother arrested me when I got home. We played bad cop and dirty cop if you know what I mean. Yes sir, Muy Caliente. I just remembered I need to run home I might be late coming back or I just might not."
"Big Mike, it's still morning. What do you have to do that you need to run home for and that will take the rest of the day?"
"Do I need to paint you a picture? Let's just say it will begin with a good frisking then some time in handcuffs probably attached to the bed posts."
"But it's the middle of the day?"
"Remember Buy More policy not to bother the assistant manager when he's going to get some afternoon delight."
"I never read anything written like that in the Buy More manager's handbook and I've got a copy in the office… your copy as a matter of fact."
"The law is open to interpretation and this is the way I'm interpreting it so have a good rest of the day," said Big Mike. "Hello police precinct this is your honey bunny my little Mexican jumping bean. I've been naughty and need punishing I'm on my way home."
"Just shoot me and put me out of my misery," said Morgan as he shook his head.
"I wouldn't repeat that anywhere near Casey. A guy said that during the last mission so John offered to help him out. I think he's been working too long here he called it his two for one special. He told the guy he'd get his wish… dead and he'd get his itch scratched."
"Cool for him."
"What isn't cool is you trying to be our third child. Morgan this isn't just for me it's also for Sarah and Sam. They need time to be alone together. You saw the way Sam treated Sarah and Sarah's worried about it so I'm sorry if you feel left out but I've got to think about my family. I know why don't you take Alex some place nice and I'll spring for it. However, by someplace nice I don't mean making a meal out of it and it isn't going to happen at the ten-dollar buffet at Sizzling Shrimp."
"Chuck, you're cramping my style here dude. Alex was happy and content with me then you start showing me up by doing things for Sarah like taking her to Monaco. The next thing I'm hearing is why can't you be more like Chuck. Chuck is so considerate when he thinks about taking care of Sarah why can't you be more like him."
"I'm sorry if I know how to treat my woman and you don't. Sarah is my soulmate I just want to do things for her because she deserves them."
"Well her getting what she deserves is keeping me from getting what I deserve," said Morgan as Casey poked his head from around the corner of the beastmaster aisle."
"And what would that be? I'd be careful how you answered that because your life could depend on it. I haven't been able to shoot anyone for a while so you can imagine I've got quite the itch right now."
"I know why don't you drive down to Acapulco for a couple of days? I can have everything covered for you and you two can get away for everything and everyone. You covered for us so it's the least I can do for you guys."
"If you take Alex to Acapulco I'll be poking you in the face with my fist multiple times. I punched one guys ticket one time and with one punch I broke his nose and blackened both his eyes as well as busted his lip. He had a little face kind of like you."
"I've seen you do that so what's the big deal about it. But just saying that I can see how I should've kept my mouth shut."
"You asked what the big deal was I was ten at the time and these high school kids were shaking us little kids down for our lunch money."
"Somehow I never really pictured you as ever being little. I guess I just assumed that the clones came out looking like you are now."
"Very funny Chuck," said Casey as he cracked his knuckles. Maybe it's time for a repeat performance right here, right now."
"No I don't see any need for that but if Morgan and Alex want to get away for a weekend what harm can it be. You should do the same with Kat… take her away. A couple of days we can cover if something comes up but remember we're taking two."
"No," screamed Morgan. Chuck looked at him like he was crazy. But Morgan realized what direction this was heading to.
"That's an excellent idea Chuck. I think we will do that. Kat and I can go with Morgan and Alex to Acapulco. That way we can keep and eye on them. I'd hate for Morgan to end up in a donkey show in Tijuana."
"Geez, thanks there Chuck old buddy you really hooked me up," said Morgan. "What's next are you going to shoot me in the head?"
"That can be arranged too," said Casey. "But in your case it would only be a flesh wound but then again all the sawdust would come pouring out."
[Back at Echo Park]
Sarah fed Bunny then put her down for her nap after Bunny fell asleep she went to check on Sam. Sam was outside with Molly playing as Emma sat in one of the chair near the fountain watching them. Emma saw Sarah come to the door then stop. She got up and walked over to her.
"Come on outside and sit with me for a bit. We can worry about lunch later on for now let's just sit and talk."
"Okay let me get the baby monitor," said Sarah. She picked up the receiver then came out and sat next to the fountain with Emma. Sam and Molly were sitting around a table with one of Sam's books open. She was teaching Sam to read.
"I wonder if you can test out of Elementary school," said Sarah as she sat down with Emma. "I didn't want to teach her to read because she's already going to be more advanced than most of the kids in her class."
"Have you thought about hiring a tutor and doing home tutoring like what we're doing with Molly and Razib. Molly seems to enjoy it and the lessons are tailored to what they need."
"But Molly has Razib to hold her lessons with while Sam would be alone with adults. She's already acting like an adult in most ways. I don't want to cheat her out of her childhood. She needs other kids her age to play with and Bunny will too."
"Is that a complaint I'm hearing about the way you were raised. I know I parked you with your granny and you ran off with your dad."
"I really don't want to get into this right now. I'm not like Chuck I don't need to exercise the ghost of Christmas past to move on to the future."
"Are you sure about that? I mean you and Sam seem to have hit a rough spot in your relationship. Maybe you're seeing now that it wasn't that easy for me."
"Okay I'll let you have that it wasn't easy and it was on me for running away with Jack. I made that decision but I don't see how that's the same thing we have here."
"You don't? Who did you leave Sam and Bunny with? I'll tell you me and who am I? I'm the granny. Doesn't that sound like what I had to do with you? I've been on the receiving end of a little pouty face too. You're right Sam does sound more like an adult than a child but if you remember correctly so did you."
"But I don't think you act as bad as granny did. There was curfew and forced labor if I stepped out of line. Half the reason I ran away with Jack was to get away from her and I always knew there would be hell to pay when I had to go back but I ran away all the same."
"I'll be the first one to admit that your granny… my mother was hard to get along with but like you I didn't have a choice."
"Mom, I really don't want to get into this with you. I understand you did what you thought was right and I get that you didn't have many options…"
"No, I had no options. But you do just remember in all this mass of confusion that the agency throws up around you your family is always he most important. People like Beckman will die old and alone. That was what I was afraid would happen to you before you met Chuck. Then you lost him now you have him and two wonderful children. Diane will never understand this and it's your job to remind her when she asks you to stupid things like what happened in Los Vegas."
"Mom, I did what I had to do and you should understand that. It all worked out in the end better than we'd thought it could've."
"Now tell that story like you really mean it to that little girl over there. You guys need this vacation together and what I don't understand is why aren't you leaving tomorrow."
"Chuck is working everything out with Morgan as we speak."