Disclaimer: The characters here and the world they inhabit are the creation and property of JK Rowling and her assigns.
"Why are you torturing me this way? Why are you torturing both of us?"
She looked at him and barely remembered to put his breakfast tray down. There was a dressing gown, but he hadn't tied it. It was nothing she hadn't seen, but he was a different man than the one brought to her the previous May. He had eaten properly, and he was stronger. He didn't need her to do things like spoon his food into his mouth any more... or some of the other things. The thought of bathing him now was... Some of the china on the tray rattled although she was no longer touching it.
The glare in his eyes became a twisted smirk. "If it's causing unintentional magic, then perhaps it truly is affecting you." He walked toward her slowly so that he wouldn't startle her. He stood in front of her, and she still hadn't moved. He thought to himself that she was his for the taking. Her eyes looked nervous, but the way she stood was an open invitation. A gentle approach had brought her to this state; he would continue with it.
"My dove," he whispered. His hand paused just a whisper away from her cheek, as he thought about how best to proceed.
The smell of cinnamon permeated the room. Her hands rushed up to her mouth in dismay. "The baking!" She ran out.
He dressed slowly enough to enjoy his coffee but quickly enough to make it into the kitchen while Andromeda was still there. She turned from the oven as he set his tray on the table. Seeing that she was using the table as she worked, he chose the end farthest from the oven. It also gave him the best view of her. Tendrils of her hair came unfastened and stuck to her neck in the heat of her baking. She stopped moving to rest for a moment and caught him staring.
He busied himself with some toast and jam. "I really don't need breakfast in my room, anymore, although I admit I do enjoy having my coffee as I prepare for the day."
For some reason, Andromeda remembered the last time she had helped Severus to dress. He was sitting on the edge of the bed. She knelt on the floor to slip his trousers over his feet and was sliding them up to his knees when she suddenly face to face with proof that his recovery had progressed considerably. She stood back up and said, "I guess you can take care of it from there."
He leaned back on an elbow. "You never know, my dove. Perhaps there's some other way you could help me?"
She looked anywhere but his intense eyes or indeed at him at all as she had handed him his shirt and then the rest of his clothing.
She took a deep breath and put her attention back on the breads and rolls she was making. It didn't keep her from wondering if that had been the first time he had used that name for her. It was certainly around that time, she decided.
"Perhaps it was," he said, sipping his coffee leisurely. "I know that's when I became sure that we should be together. It was just one of the many delightful moments I've had with you."
She turned right around. She knew he was an expert Legilimens, and it wasn't the first time he had caught her out. Foolish witch! If she gave him control of her mind, she would never get through the holiday with an intact—What was she trying to keep intact, anyway? Was there virtue in aching so desperately for another man while remaining technically true to her husband? What would Ted say about that? His voice in her head was strangely quiet.
After several days of constant cooking, cleaning, and decorating, Christmas Eve finally arrived. Dinner was a success, and the students enchanted her with their efforts to entertain each other afterward. Severus saw them off in a jovial mood, and then Draco quietly wished them a Happy Christmas and went to bed. Andromeda went upstairs with her grandson.
It was difficult, getting Teddy into bed that night. He was overexcited from all of the Christmas activities. It was quite late before Andromeda had a moment to herself, when she put on her own nightgown. Following some whim, because it was Christmas after all, she wore a pretty nightgown with lace trim. She stared at herself in the mirror as she brushed her hair.
She didn't think she would ever be beautiful. She didn't have Trixie's full blown sensuality, nor Cissy's delicate loveliness. She did have a pretty enough face and figure. Ted had made her feel like the most beautiful woman in the world. Severus had been openly desirous, but of course he was not a consideration. He might desire whom he pleased, but his future was with Hermione, according to Cissy. Andromeda would simply have to see if another wizard whom she could love would ever come to her cottage.
There was a terrible yearning within her tonight. Usually she could stave it off by remembering Ted's touches, but this time it wasn't working for some reason. Instead she kept remembering Severus's kiss under the mistletoe and the way she had laughingly pretended it was just a joke when the kids had looked at them. She couldn't close her eyes, for she would recall the look in his eye that had told her it wasn't a joke to him. What had he whispered into her ear as he deliberately snapped off some of the sprig?
Our moment is almost here.
There wouldn't—there couldn't—be a moment for them. Andromeda understood that it was hard to wait until the younger witch was ready, but surely he realized that it would be better if he did. He didn't really need to have a mistress for just the few months until the N.E.W.T.s were over.
Her hair crackled; she had brushed it too hard for too long. She set the brush on her dresser and turned toward the bed. There was only one pillow on it, one space where one body lay. When, exactly, had it become just her bed, no longer the one she shared with her husband?
The dream lover came back. He started by touching her through her nightgown and then slid a hand through where it had gaped open during the course of the night. He hummed delightedly as he traced along the edges, touching and stroking until her back was straining her body into his hands.
His mouth started to take action. He kissed and his tongue moved over her skin, raising goosebumps and her blood. He continued, suffusing a delicious heat throughout her entire body. A soft moan escaped her, and he chuckled as he loosened her nightgown, sliding it gently over her shoulders...
She came abruptly awake. He was haunting her day and night, now. There was only one way to escape him. She let herself out of the house and stood in the garden, looking at the stars. "Please, Ted," she begged, not sure what she was asking for. There was some comfort in seeing him up there, rushing across the sky to see her.
How long had it been since she had heard his voice in her head? She tilted to the side to look at the constellation again. Was he rushing away, instead? All this time, was Perseus moving away from Andromeda? Is that why he never caught her? She looked up into the sky, willing Perseus to turn his head and look at her, but the stars were blind.
Severus heard the house door open and close. She was going outside again. He went to the window and watched her stand there in an insignificant nightgown. The starlight was bright enough for him to see her form silhouetted against the sky. He put on his own robe and shoes. Then he went down to the mud room and found the shawl she often wore when stargazing. He quietly made his way across the lawn.
"Why will you never come back?" he heard. "Why must I be tortured with this ache? If you would just look at me..." He stood in indecision and then started to back away.
She sighed and spoke a bit more loudly. "It's all right, Severus."
He came forward then and covered her with the wrap, holding his hands over her shoulders. She shrugged into the comfort it offered and then looked back up at the stars. "He's never coming back, is he?"
There was no hiding the obvious. "No."
"He's gone." There was a pain in that statement that was hard for him to stand.
"Somehow I think you'll carry him with you wherever you go." He didn't need to explain why he thought that. She knew.
"It's not the same. Maybe it would have been better if my sister had killed me instead of just breaking my things. My life is over."
"No," he averred. "You are a vibrant and passionate woman, Andromeda. One part of your life has ended, yes, but another part can begin."
"Perhaps. All I know is that he's gone and I'm alone."
"You're not alone as long as I'm here."
How long would that be? She wondered. For over six months they had spent more time together than most married couples. She had looked after his needs, had entertained him, had sat quietly with him when both were engrossed in their own pursuits... He was right, she had not been alone during that whole time. He was so much to her already, and she would miss him when he was gone.
She sighed at that thought. If she allowed him to become even more to her, she would be completely lost when he left. Already there had been the day he had gone to Diagon Alley to do his shopping for the holidays, and Andromeda had wandered through her cottage unable to sit down, not quite at home without the need to do something for him. She turned to look at him again, and within that heartbeat everything was different, although nothing actually changed.
He watched her, wishing he knew what to do for her. He desired her, and he knew she desired him as well. He knew the pain of having lost a great love—to a point. He understood that her loss was greater than what he experienced in losing Lily. Just now she was the loneliest person in the world, and he begged the stars above to show him what to do to ease her pain.
Maybe she turned to slip away from him, or maybe he judged that the time had finally come for a small push. She made a movement toward the house, but he pulled her close and kissed her. It was only a moment, but it was long enough. He pulled away to search her eyes. Andromeda wasn't sure what she was feeling or what she wanted, but whatever it was must have been what he was looking for. She felt Severus's lips touch hers a second time, and her last conscious thought was that she couldn't get close enough to him.
She was vaguely aware of somehow making it into the cottage. There was a sort of movement into a bedroom and onto a bed. His hands were everywhere, doing the most exquisite things to her. She had the impression of a pleasure that spread through her entire body, followed by a sigh of delight that bubbled up and through her.
When she regained full awareness, he was shifting his naked body away from hers. They were in a bed—sweet Helga, don't let it be Ted's and hers! She quickly raised her head to see that it was Alphard's room and lay back in initial relief.
She looked at him and realized what they had done. She couldn't stop the tears as they started. "Andromeda," he said as he pulled her close and held her tenderly, "please don't cry, my dove."
"So much lost," she whispered. "My husband, my daughter, your Lily..." She wouldn't mention Hermione at such a moment, but she cried for the girl who had lost a small something this night, too.
"Oh, my dove, I'm sorry," he soothed her as he held her, letting her cry. It occurred to him that she was expressing his grief as much as hers. He kissed her and patted her hair as she cried. After a little while, her sobs quieted, and she tilted her head back to receive his kisses.
She changed in his arms, and he knew that she would receive his attentions again. He touched her hair and her face as gently as he could. She sighed and melted into him. He held her and roused her with delicate touches until her sighs became insistent. She spoke in breathy murmurings until one long, shuddering breath indicated to him that he had brought her bliss. He quickly followed as pleasure washed through him and into her.
She looked up at him with unreadable eyes, and he searched for a way to reassure her. "Thank you, Andromeda. I knew we would find something exceptional together." She didn't speak but instead curled into a ball. He put his arms around her comfortingly. She stiffened but then settled into his side.
Just before dawn, he became aware of the door to the bedroom opening for a moment and then closing again as her nephew, holding the baby, looked in on them and quickly stepped back out. Severus was so completely relaxed and at peace that it didn't seem out of place to him. He kissed her head and settled her more firmly against his chest. She whispered something unintelligible in her sleep and put her arms more closely around him. As he fell asleep again, he felt the greatest contentment he could remember knowing.
A/N: Again, thank you faithful readers for following this story. I do enjoy your comments when you have a chance to make them, so feel free to say what's on your mind. This has been beta read by the wonderful Mark Darcy.