Hello, lovelies! I am so, so sorry about the wait. Here's a super-long chapter as an apology.

Disclaimer: I know, you know, that I don't own Psych. Run, you clever boy, and remember, that I also don't own Doctor Who.

"So, who are you really?" Shawn asked as soon as they left the building.

"What do you mean?" The Doctor asked innocently. "I'm just your regular—"

"Nope."

"What do you mean, 'Nope?'"

"I mean, 'nope.' Don't buy it. No way are you, my trenchcoat-ed and besneaker-ed British pal, are you regular or average in any way. I mean, you obviously have connections, and some kind of heroic complex, but what else?"

"Complex?" the Doctor sounded offended.

"Oh come on. The spirits are telling me—"

"Nope."

"Excuse me?"

"What? If I can't lie, neither can you. And you are most certainly not psychic."

"Yeah I am."

"Nope. And really, it will save us time if you drop this silly charade when it's just the four of us. This is very important."

"Guys!" Juliet called from the top of the steps. "Woody just finished with the autopsy. You might wanna see this."

...

"Welcome!" Woody exclaimed to the large group, consisting not only of the four on the case, but Lassie and Juliet as well. "It's always nice to see new people interested in cadavers."

"They're investigating. And busy." Lassie said, still upset over being excluded.

"Of course." Woody nodded. "Would you care for a cheese cracker before we begin?" He offered a plate filled with dainty little cheese slices over round crackers.

Shawn and the Doctor immediately grabbed a cracker, and after a slight hesitation, Gus selected one too.

"Seriously?" Martha asked the Doctor, grinning.

"What?"

"There is a corpse in the room."

"It's not like the food was on the corpse….It wasn't on the corpse, was it?"

"Of course not." Woody set the snack plate down and pulled the sheet down from the face of the corpse.

"This is Brenda Lively, our second victim."

"She doesn't seem very lively to me." Shawn's quip was met with silence and stares. "Carry on."

"As you can tell from the blood in her ears, it appears she suffered from major cerebral hemorrhaging before she died. However, her brain, along with her internal organs, seems to have…melted. I mean, it is soup in there. Reddish soup with little hunks of intestines and stomach, with a hint of liver—"

Gus gagged. "We get it, Woody."

"Really?" The Doctor asked, intrigued. "Just like that? Intestine stew?"

"Much closer to a soup, actually. You see, stews tend to be thicker, with more meat, usually in larger hunks. Her organs were almost completely liquefied, save for a few bits of tissue here and there."

"What about her bones?"

"That's what's really weird. With all this damage to the organs, you'd think her skeletal system would look similar, right? Wrong! Muscles, bones, tendons—all completely intact! And in decent shape. Brenda must have worked out."

"Huh." The Doctor eyed Juliet and Lassiter. "Would you mind leaving for a few? I have a few tests I need to run myself."

"Certainly." Woody agreed. "I need to check on my pet parakeet anyway. She has the measles."

"Spencer, Gus? You two can stay."

"Are you sure?" Martha asked.

"If we're going to work together, they need to know as much as we do."

"That's right!" Lassie exclaimed. "We need to stick together."

"This is just getting sad, Carlton." Juliet sighed and escorted Lassiter out of the room.

As soon as the Doctor was sure they were gone, he took a small metallic object out of his pocket and pointed it at the corpse. A buzzing sound came from it the end emitted a blue light.

"Um, what is that?" Gus asked.

"My sonic screwdriver."

"Right." Gus smiled and leaned toward Shawn. "Shawn, the dude has a magic wand."

"Gus, that is obviously not a wand. Wands are more stick-like, and have unicorn blood in them."

"No, they have unicorn hair in them. Unicorn blood is what Voldemort drinks in book one!"

"Technically, Professor Quirrell drank the unicorn blood." Martha spoke up.

"You read Harry Potter?" Gus asked, impressed.

"And seen all the movies."

Gus grinned. "Did you hear about Pluto? That's messed up, right?"

"Dude, seriously? Doc is scanning a corpse with goo for eyes right in front of you, with his sonic looks-nothing-like-a screwdriver, and you're flirting?"

"Shut up, Shawn. She reads, and she's obviously adventurous, and she's British."

"You know I can still hear you."

"A-HA!" The Doctor straightened up and looked at the screwdriver. "I'm seventy-eight percent sure I know what we're dealing with!"

"What?" Martha asked.

"Keh-Sha."

"The singer?" Gus asked.

"Don't be daft. The Keh-Sha are an alien species with no corpeal body. On Gystehlia, their home planet, they generally inhabit living non-entities, closer to plants that people, though they do resemble humans to a degree. My guess is that a group crash-landed here and attempted to inhabit Miss Lively, and got so scared they burned her up from the inside, liquefying her internal organs. You see, the Keh-Sha are powered by emotion. The stronger the feeling, the stronger they burn. They were frightened when they entered the body, causing her to be even more frightened then one normally would, which in turn scared the Keh-Sha even more, causing a chain reaction until—"

"Organ soup." Martha finished.

"Um, yeah. Just one question?" Shawn half raised his hand. "What planet are you from?"

"Gallifrey. Anything else? Because we need to find the Keh-Sha and take them home before anyone else dies."

"You're an alien." Gus stated.

"Yup."

"And she's…?"

"Human, and she can hear you!" Martha snapped. "I just travel with him."

"Through space."

"And time" Shawn added helpfully.

"How did you know that?" the Doctor asked. "And please hold the psychic bit."

"Fine. If you must know, it was your hair. There is some residue in it that coincides with early English architecture."

"Really?"

"No. Between the alien thing and the Shakespeare talk, I guessed."

Gus then cut in. "I'm sorry, but I've had my fill of crazy for the day. If the three of you want to play alien, go ahead. I'll be at home, enjoying a delicous bowl of Lucky Charms."

"Gus, c'mon. Aliens."

"No, Shawn. Crazy. And I don't feel like baby-sitting all three of you. I'm out."

"You can't be out. This is the opportunity of a lifetime. It only happens once in your life. I mean, its right there in the name."

"Shawn, aliens do not exist. And if they did, they would look like little green men or nasty worm-things that hatch from your stomach, not like a British guy in a trenchcoat!"

"Then explain the sonic hand-dryer."

"Screwdriver! It's a sonic screwdriver!" The Doctor interjected.

"Who would make a sonic screwdriver?" Shawn asked. "I mean, you have all this futuristic technology at your fingertips, and you build a sonic screwdriver? Why not a sonic handgun? Or toaster?"

"I don't like weap-did you say toaster?"

"Yes. You could have perfectly toasted toast, any time you wanted...provided you have the bread."

"Hmm" The Doctor studied his screwdriver as Gus quietly began making his way to the door. "I suppose I could add a new setting...Martha, what do you think about using the sonic to make breakfast?"

"That thing?". Martha laughed. "Sorry Doctor, I'd rather–"

"Gus!" Shawn cried, grabbing him before he assed him. "C'mon, man. Aliens! It'll be like when we were kids!"

"What? And saw a port-a-potty?"

"That may or may not have contained extra-terrestrial life forms."

"It didn't."

"I'm bored with this now.". The Doctor decided. He grabbed a stethescope from a nearby table and crossed over to Gus, popping the ear pieces in Gus's ears, ignoring his objections, and placing the third end on his own chest. "Listen.". After a moment, he moved the stethescope over slightly.

Gus's eyes widened. "Shawn." He said, eyes never leaving the Doctor's. "The man has two hearts."

"Seriously?" Shawn asked. The Doctor nodded. "Cool! I want two hearts! Gus, c'mere. And, uh, hold still for about, two hours." Shawn picked up a scalpel. "I'm not gonna lie, this may sting a little" Shawn deadpanned.

"Shawn, get that thing away from me!" Gus hid behind the Doctor as Shawn attempted to poke Gus with the scalpel.

"Come on! You'll barely feel a thing!"

"That scalpel cut into a dead chick Shawn! I am not having you touch me with that thing!"

"Are you two always like this?" The Doctor interrupted.

"Pretty much!" Shawn yelled, still trying to attack Gus.

"And you mananged to trick everyone into believing you're a psychic for how many years?"

"I am a psychic!"

"About eight years!"

"Gus!" Shawn stopped going after Gus and put the scalpel down. "Why would you do that?"

"So you might put down that stupid scalpel. And it worked!"

"You're the one who's all 'Oh, Shawn, make sure to keep pretending to be psychic, I don't want to end up in jail' and you tell?!" Shawn exclaimed, doing a rather poor impression of Gus, in fact sounding more like Henry Spencer.

"First off, I do not sound like that! Secondly, if we do end up in jail because of this, I will sell you out faster that a concert ticket to a Coldplay concert. Third, the guy's an alien. I'm pretty sure he's good with secrets."

Shawn paused. "Who listens to Coldplay anymore?"

"I do Shawn. It's catchy and good workout music."

"Since when do you work out?"

Gus glanced at Martha, who was watching them with an amused expression. "I work out all the time."

"No you don't."

"Yes, I do, Shawn. You don't know everything about me. I worked out just this morning. I took a jog through the hiking trail in the woods."

Shawn gave Gus a quick once-over. "Then how come the only bit of dirt in your shoes is sand from the beach? "

"I wore jogging shoes Shawn."

"Like those are a thing. Besides, on the extremely rare occasions you do go jogging, you make one of those disgusting health smoothies in the blender. The blender was devoid of any smoothie-ness, both good and disgusting."

"…I washed it."

"If you had, you would have noticed I replaced the dish soap with blueberry syrup. You did NOT work out today, and you are lying about it, which is kinda pathetic."

"I could have worked out."

"C'mon son."

"Anybody want to go after the aliens?" the Doctor asked.

"Wait…you put syrup in the dish soap."

"Of course not."

"Good."

"That would imply some soap remains. I replaced the soap with syrup."

"Seriously? Nice, bright aliens outside, just waiting to be tracked down."

"Why?" Gus asked Shawn.

"I was bored, and you were at your boring job."

"What's his job?" Martha asked.

"He sells drugs."

"Ignore him. I am a pharmaceutical representative."

"You sell drugs."

"I do not just 'sell drugs' Shawn. I make deals with large offices and convince doctors to use our high-quality products."

"Close enough."

"Martha, aliens?" The Doctor tried.

"This is kind of amusing."

"Fine!" Gus gave up. "Let's go. Do you have a car?" he asked the Doctor.

"My, uh, transport is kind of…incapacitated at the moment."

"Fine, I'll drive."

"Shotgun!" Shawn and the Doctor yelled at the same time.

"Seriously?" Martha and Gus asked their respective friends.

"What? I want to sit in the front." The Doctor responded.

"You can't call shotgun until you see the car." Gus pointed out.

Shawn and the Doctor looked at each other, and broke out into a run, both racing to get to the car.

Martha and Gus looked at each other, grinning.

"Is your friend always like this?" Martha asked.

"Sometimes he's worse. Yours?"

"As far as I can tell, he's either a child or this powerful, strong hero. Almost no in-between. And now I find out he's got a twin. How is Shawn when he's serious?"

Gus's smile dimmed. "I've only seen him serious a few times. It's never good."

Martha nodded. "Right, well, they're probably about to destroy your car. Shall we play referee?"

Gus smiled. "We'd better." He offered Martha his arm. "To the Blueberry?"

Martha laughed and slipped her arm in Gus's. "Yours is blue, too then?"

"Yup."

With that, they walked out of the morgue and to the car, where a pseudo-psychic and a nine-hundred year old alien were arguing over who called shotgun first.

Again, so sorry about the wait. First, I had to finalize a bunch of college stuff, then internet problems. I'll do my best to make sure chapters are updated faster from now on.

And I promise, I have nothing against Lassiter. I just feel he would be very put out to be left out of such an important case, especially when Shawn and Gus are being given free range.

Oh, and I'm considering adding a dash of Supernatural to this. How would you guys feel about the Winchesters crashing the party? (The sooner I know, the sooner I can update)

Thank you for bearing with me. Hope to see you soon!