Author's Note: Hey guys! Long time no see, ;) So, there is no excuse really for me not getting this up faster and I feel really bad about it. I actually wanted to get this out before the premiere last week, but it wasn't ready so :( Speaking of season 3, what do you guys think? I'm absolutely loving Stefan this season (especially last episode), and would really love to hear what you guys thought about it! Also, if you guys go on Tumblr, my url is listed in my profile. I'd love to talk with you! :)

Well anyways, anonymous reviews are below. Enjoy :)

cherry657: Thank you! :)

booyah: Thank you! That makes me feel a little better, but I still wish I could update sooner!

More: Here you go :)

Huh: Aw, thank you!

86: Thank you :D

krazykittykartwheel: Thank you! I'm glad you like it! And here's more :)

iGG: Oh my god, what can I say to this wonderful review? Really, your reviews make me feel so good. I'm so glad that you seem to really enjoy this story, because I honestly never expected this much response. Really appreciate all that you had to comment on and compliment and I'm honestly touched that you wrote such a long review :DD So sweet, thank you! Oh, and thank you for understanding about how often I update.

Hell: Thank you, I'm glad you liked it! And protective Damon is awesome!

v-babe: Glad you thought it was cute lol! Yes, Stefan is cute, isn't he :) I'm glad you really like the story!

MaraJade: Thank you! And here's an update :)

Damon awoke with a start to find that he was gripping something very tightly and securely. Looking down, he found that he was holding his younger brother closely to him and the memories came rushing back.

Shifting Stefan so that he could look more closely at his stab wound, he undid the bandages he had placed on before and saw that the wound was still there but much smaller. The older brother could also hear that Stefan's breathing seemed a little strained. With all the cups in the room empty of blood, Damon allowed his fangs to come out and bit down on his wrist again.

He found that he actually didn't mind feeding his brother. It was convenient and allowed Damon to give him the blood right then and there, rather than having him waste all the animal blood downstairs. Plus, a cocky side of Damon said that his blood was "superior" and would get the healing job done much quicker.

"Ow!" Damon said playfully, pulled out of his thoughts as Stefan unconsciously bit him while sucking the blood. "Easy there, Stefan." Damon chided.

Damon then extracted his wrist from his little brother's mouth and found himself smiling a little when Stefan seemed to pout in his sleep at not having the steady flow of blood anymore. Damon turned his head to the side with a slight shake. "Don't pout. I'll go get you some more; like the slave I am, right little brother?" The elder vampire joked in an effort to get some sort of reaction out of his younger brother.

Stefan, however, remained unresponsive and Damon creased his brow in worry. Placing his hand one more time on his brother's head, Damon ran at inhuman speed to fill up more cups of blood. He also realized he was getting very low on animal blood. He would have to go out sometime and hunt but he also realized that he didn't want to leave Stefan alone..

Back in his brother's room, Stefan was still out cold on the bed. Bringing the first cup of warm blood close, he eased his brother's head back up and watched him silently drink. When the cup was about halfway empty, Stefan started to fuss; as though he was done with the blood. Damon frowned. "Are you sure, Stef? You seemed very eager about it before."

Almost as if he had heard what Damon just said, Stefan shook his head and moaned. "Nooo. I .. don't..want ..to be.. a.. monster. Ohh."

Damon leaned back in surprise and placed the cup on the nearest table. Sitting closer on the bed, Damon watched as Stefan kept fidgeting and mumbling. What was Stefan talking about?

"Noo. I'm a monster. Oh, what have I done? Damon…Damon, I'm sorry. No!" Stefan cried out.

"Stefan!" Damon gripped his brother's shoulders in an attempt to wake him and Stefan flew up, panting hard.

"Stefan, relax." Damon spoke soothingly to calm his very nervous little brother. This was weird. One moment Stefan was completely normal and sleeping calmly. The next, he was mumbling and acting all crazed. He looked like a mess as well; head slightly sweaty, hair disheveled and all over the place.

Stefan started to breathe a little more evenly and noticed Damon sitting beside him. "Damon."

"Hey." Damon gave him a slight comforting smile. "What happened? "

Stefan shook his head again and raised his hand to his messy hair. "I-I saw things. Things I know that I did. It was awful." Stefan looked up at him with tear filled eyes.

Seeing his brother almost crying again broke Damon's heart; though he'd never admit it. "Whoa. Stef, calm down. You probably just had a nightmare." Damon gave him a smirk. "You remember those don't you? You used to get them all the time." An image came instantly to Damon's head of a four year old Stefan coming into his room and climbing into his bed with him, slightly crying from the latest nightmare, and knowing the only place he would ever be able to find sleep again was in his big brother's arms.

Wow. That was so long ago. Damon hadn't thought about times like those in decades. This Stefan certainly had an effect on him.

"It wasn't like that. I know they were ..memories that I forgot happened. Things that I had done. So much pain." Stefan eyes clouded again and he dropped his head down.

Damon was at a slight loss. Was Stefan really seeing past events now in his dreams? "Stefan.."

His brother brought his head back at just Damon's voice. Green eyes filled with despair looked back at normally icy blue eyes that now held softness. "I'm sorry brother. I did terrible things. I'm a monster. I..I..hurt you. And I…killed Father." Stefan started to softly sob, horribly ashamed and disgusted with himself.

Damon had never heard Stefan talk this way. Yes, he had heard Stefan refer to himself as a monster when it concerned how he acted on human blood, but never so broken and to everything he did in general. Damon put an arm gingerly on Stefan's shoulder. "Stefan, it's alright. Please don't cry." The elder Salvatore was torn. A part of him that still had unresolved issues with Stefan for years wanted to say yes, it was all your fault. Another part just saw his little brother crying. Either way, he wasn't as affectionate as he could be and perhaps Stefan noticed this.

Stefan jerked away from him. "No, it's not alright! You hate me, don't you?" Stefan said this quietly. Damon gave no response.

"You see! I know, now. I saw. I saw how I ruined your life, how I hurt you. All the terrible things I did. And how you hate me with everything you have, and want nothing more than to give me an eternity of misery!" Stefan shouted this at him.

Damon winced at this but gave his younger brother a steady and somewhat cold look. "This conversation is best suited for when the Stefan from before comes back. It doesn't concern you, little brother." Damon spat out the name mockingly.

Stefan looked back at him angrily. "You don't get it! I am that Stefan!" Damon raised his eyebrows at this. Stefan merely continued in a huff. "How else would I have seen those memories if I wasn't that Stefan! Although the spell may have changed me and messed up my memories, I'm still him! He's still inside of me, a part of me. And what I say is no different from what he feels."

Damon was once again startled. Even though he knew that the Stefan in front of him was still Stefan, he had just always felt that the Stefan who had lived everything from before was gone until the spell was reversed. To think that Stefan had actually been here the whole time, subconsciously, inside 1864 Stefan, well, he really didn't know what to think. It was going to take awhile to wrap his mind around the whole thing. This spell is such a pain in the ass.

While Damon was still reeling over what his brother had just angrily announced, said brother was attempting to get off the bed.

Finally noticing his younger brother's actions, Damon made a grab for him and firmly pushed him back on the bed. "Please sit and behave." Damon's voice held obvious authority and any trace of light-heartedness was gone. Surprisingly, Stefan obeyed and lay back down on the bed, turning away from Damon to stare silently at the wall.

Damon blew out some air. With all this brooding, how could I question that the other Stefan had been gone?

"Stefan-" Damon started.

"Please leave me alone." Stefan mumbled this into his pillow but knew with everyone in the room having enhanced hearing this was hardly a problem.

Damon sped over to where his brother had turned away from him on the bed, slightly startling him. Stefan cringed away, "I hate when you do that."

"Tough." Damon placed his hands under Stefan's legs and moved them over, not asking for permission to do so. Once again, Stefan barely acknowledged this and just continued to stare sadly.

"Stefan, are we really going to do this?" Damon asked.

"Do what?" Came a quiet response.

Damon rolled his eyes. Why must his brother be so difficult? "Look, so we have some issues. Don't pout about it." Damon said harshly, expecting a reaction from Stefan. None came. "What did you expect? A happy fairytale ending after we became vampires? " The older vampire fell back into his old habits of lashing out at Stefan in cold indifference.

His younger brother said nothing and Damon became annoyed. "I'll come back to check on your healing and give you more blood." And like a flash Damon was gone. In the silence of his brother's absence, a single tear fell down the younger Salvatore's cheek.

A week had passed and not much had changed between the brothers since Stefan had first experienced his onslaught of memories. Damon usually spent the day downstairs, yelling at Bonnie to get her ass in gear and figure out a solution to the spell; that he had waited long enough and if she couldn't come up with results in a matter of days, someone would pay.

Bonnie took this to mean that someone would die and simply assumed that Damon was running his mouth with his usual empty threats. She had gotten an earful from Damon after hearing about Jules' attack and Stefan's brief scare. Bonnie had been quite taken aback by the whole incident – she had never heard Damon so upset.

This was partly why she wasn't telling Damon to go to hell at the moment while he was screaming obscenities at her. She obviously didn't appreciate his constant yelling and death threats, but this spell was her fault and she would own up to what she had done and not stop until she had found a solution. Not to mention all that had happened to Stefan, just because he was Stefan and only wanted to help ease everyone's worries about Klaus, Elena's worries about her, and Bonnie's own over enthusiasm for spells as an extension of her own worry for Elena.

All of this and look at where it had gotten him. After hearing about the attack and Stefan getting hurt, Bonnie's guilt had threatened to consume her but she fought it down with more determination. All of Damon's yells came from his worry for his brother and now with Jules in the picture Bonnie had to stop at nothing to fix the problem she had created.

Stefan on the other hand, spent most of his days holed up in his "room". He found he suddenly had a lack of energy or will or something. He couldn't place it, but perhaps it was more that he didn't want to. Maybe because he knew all along what was missing, what was causing this horrible heartache, what gave him nightmares at night that every time he would pray that he wouldn't wake up screaming; for he knew that he could no longer cry for comfort that had so easily come to him.

Speaking of nightmares, they were getting worse. Every time it seemed he closed his eyes, Stefan saw his past. Saw The Ripper's past. He hated the ripper. He hated himself. At first, he had just wanted to believe that maybe Damon had been right, that they were just dreams, nothing more.

He knew he was right though. He knew this was part of the spell because he felt a semblance of recognition when he dreamed these terrible images. Because it was all real and had lived before, within himself. And because of the emotions it stirred inside him. The emotions tied to him becoming a ripper – a link to the ache he was feeling now. The loss of Damon. Of everything.

After all, hadn't he only wanted to be a vampire if Damon was one as well? He had never wanted to become a vampire; Stefan remembered one memory with him and Katherine and of her showing her vampirism and him turning away in fear. He had only become one because his urges had been too hard to deny with the blood everywhere. And by the time he knew what he was doing, it was too late. So, he had raced back, knowing that he couldn't live this new life without Damon. That before he been okay with dying, because it meant he was following Damon into death. That he needed his brother, and he just couldn't care about if Damon really wanted that too.

Stefan sobbed silently to himself. Damon had every right to hate him. For everything he was. All Damon had ever done was take care of his little brother. Think of Stefan before himself. And what had Stefan done? Stefan had been selfish in the one time that Damon had wanted something for himself and Stefan had taken that away from him because that's what he wanted.

So after Damon had rightfully rejected him, he hadn't been able to deal with it and became even more selfish by becoming a devilish character to hide his pain, his guilt. Took it out on numerous innocent lives and gave into the bloodlust so nothing but the blood and the hunt existed. If Damon hadn't hated Stefan for who he was before, Stefan couldn't see how he couldn't hate him for what he had become.

Elena knocked on the door, harder this time. She had been waiting for about a minute after the first knock and there had been no response - an unusual occurrence for a house of vampires.

Something was up with the Salvatore's and Elena was very worried. Damon had told her what had happened to Stefan last week and she had been desperate to see him for some time now. But every time Damon told her he was not allowing anyone to see him and that he was resting and to visit later.

Well, it was later and Elena was impatient. She longed to be in Stefan's arms, see if he was okay and to hold him and just be with him. She would get in this house if she had to break it down as far as she was concerned.

"Damon! It's Elena! Let me in! I'm not leaving until you do!" Elena was about to knock again and when the door suddenly swung open and Damon appeared on the other end.

"Please, stop that. It's so very annoying with vampire hearing."

Elena walked past him. "Well sorry, but maybe if you had answered my calls saying I was coming or bothered to open the door the first time I knocked, maybe I wouldn't have to make your ears bleed."

Damon rolled his eyes at that. "Oh please. My ears are so not bleeding. Especially not at the expense of some human knocking."

"Let's skip past the witty banter. You know why I'm here, so I'll just be upstairs then, alright?" Elena was already turning towards the stairs.

"Uh-huh. Not so fast." Damon grabbed her arm. "I don't think that's a great idea.."

Elena frowned. "Why Damon? It's been a week. Please. I need to see him." Elena stared at him and Damon had to look away from the pleading in her eyes.

Damon sighed. "Look, we had an argument and he's been very upset. He never comes out of his room, he won't look at me and when I look at him he looks so far gone I don't know what to do or say!" Damon bowed his head. After a weeks worth of his brother's immense sadness, Damon wasn't sure what to do anymore. He longed for the time he and Stefan had easily played football outside and even eaten that goofy breakfast. He thought he was getting his little brother back again. But of course, it seemed he had managed to screw that up again.

Elena noticed how torn up Damon seemed. "How did you two get in an argument? It seemed like he was worshipping you the last time I saw the two of you together?"

"It seems like he's been remembering things from before..and he got pretty upset over it." Damon sighed again.

"Damon let me help. I can talk to him." Elena was determined to get through to Stefan.

"Alright." Damon consented and she immediately rushed up the stairs.

Outside of Stefan's closed door, Elena wondered if she should knock. She supposed since this Stefan wasn't familiar with her, it would be rude to just walk in unannounced.

"Stefan?" She knocked twice. "It's Elena. Can I come in?"

No response. Hmmmmm, well I did try.

Elena swung the door open, happy that these doors didn't have locks on them. Stefan was lying on his bed, seemingly in a deep sleep. Elena walked quietly up to his prone figure and whispered softly to him. "Stefan. Hey, Stefan." She laid her hand on his shoulder and moved it up in an affectionate manner.

When Stefan still continued sleeping peacefully, Elena smiled a little at him. She couldn't help it. All her determination seemed to melt away as soon as she saw him. Propping herself up on the bed, Elena situated herself so that Stefan lay resting in her lap. Her fingers sought out his long silky locks and she began gently playing with them.

Elena brought her lips down his head, giving him a soft kiss. "I love you Stefan. I missed you."

Elena continued to hold Stefan until she could feel him starting to wake. She herself had almost drifted off into sleep several times as she lay on the bed.

"Stefan?" Elena asked softly.

Stefan stirred and blinked. Looking around, he took notice that someone was holding him and it wasn't Damon. Glancing up at Elena, he was a little startled.

"Shh, it's ok Stefan. It's Elena." Elena now felt a little bad. She kept forgetting that Stefan would be confused by her obvious affection, not to mention being in the bed with him.

"Oh, um. Not to be rude, but what are you doing in here?" Stefan moved out of her arms.

"I'm sorry. The thing is, you and I are dating, and I missed you so much I just wanted to see you." Elena said earnestly.

Stefan looked a little surprised again and scratched his head. "Oh. Well, then I'm very sorry then Miss Elena."

Elena blushed and let out a little laugh at Stefan's out of date mannerisms. "Stefan, please just call me Elena. It's the 21st century." She joked lightly.

Stefan smiled back at her and blushed too. "Sorry. Elena then." He smiled again.

Elena scooted closer to where he was on the bed and ignored how he unconsciously seemed to back away slightly. "I'm glad you're ok. I was really worried about you." Elena said.

Stefan looked back at her. "I'm alright. Thank you." He looked back down.

"Damon told me that you've been feeling a little down?" Stefan flinched again.

"I'm fine." His response was quiet.

Elena thought for a moment. "Hey. You know what? We should get out of here and have some fun!" Elena said. She wanted to get Stefan out of the house and possibly get him to open up to her.

He looked up at her in surprise. "I don't know.. Besides, Damon will never let me go out."

Damn. She had forgotten about Damon. "Well, then we'll sneak out."

Stefan raised his eyebrows at this. "Elena, how are we going to do that?"

Elena just smiled at him in a way that reminded him very much of Katherine.

More knocks at the front door. "Ugh, what now!" Damon shouted annoyed. He swung the door open and found none other than vampire Barbie at his doorstep.

"Well, well, well. What can I help you with Blondie?"

Caroline skipped past him and walked right in. Damon rolled his eyes and shut the door. "Seriously, what do you want?"

"Don't get so snippy," At Damon's look, Caroline added, "please." "I'm running out of blood bags and I was wondering if I could maybe borrow some of yours?"

Damon looked annoyed again. "Can't you just go and get your own, jeez. I'm not your blood dealer." He smirked to himself.

Caroline just shook her head. "Please, Damon? I'm still new to this and Stefan always let me borrow bags from him. I'm still not sure about my compelling abilities if I run into someone."

Damon sighed. "Ugh, find. Come on." He raised his hand and gestured her to follow him to the basement. As they were walking, Caroline dug into her pocket and sent a text to Elena signaling the coast was clear.

Back up in Stefan's room, Elena received the text she was waiting for. "Ok, it's time to move."

Stefan still looked unsure and was about to hesitate.

"It's ok Stefan." Elena assured him.

He nodded and followed her down the stairs. Elena looked back and forth to see if Damon was anywhere in sight. She then turned to Stefan and grabbed at her ear – signaling for Stefan to see if he could hear them.

Stefan strained his ears a little and found that he could hear Damon and Caroline talking, but they were definitely still downstairs. He nodded back at Elena to say everything was fine. She smiled back and soon they were both out the door, making their way to Elena's car.

"Whoa-what's?" Stefan pointed at Elena's car.

"Oh, it's this century's type of transportation. An extremely updated carriage, if you will. It's called a car." Elena said as they got in. Elena then showed him the seat belt and she started the engine.

"Alright. Time for some fun."