Gokudera freezes up at Phoenix's revelation.

"No…no you didn't…You wouldn't want to….You're not like that."

"I did…No one wanted the job, it had been up for grabs for almost six months, no one wanted to piss off the Vongola. The boss raised the reward and I took it…I didn't think twice. I…I…" Phoenix unconsciously slips into Gaelic. "Bhí mé sásta a mharú Tsuna ar feadh deich mhór agus an chuid eile de tú ar feadh cúiggach ... bhí mé réidh agus toilteanach chun tú a mharú ..."

Gokudera scoots away from Phoenix as he stares at her.

"I don't…I don't want to believe you…"

"I know you don't…I…" Once again begins to speak Gaelic without meaning to. "Tá brón orm. Mar sin, an-brón orm. Níl aon rud is féidir a dhéanamh is féidir suas do. Tá a fhios agam go bhfuil, ach Hayato ... le do thoil ..."

"GOD DAMNIT! At least speak fucking English! I can't…I don't fucking understand."

"I'm sorry! I...I switch back when I can't keep my emotions under control...

I said, 'I'm sorry. So very sorry. Nothing could ever make up for it, I know that but...Hayato, please...'"

Phoenix looks at Gokudera pleadingly and Gokudera squares his jaw.

"…So it's…true?"

"Yes...But I hate myself for it! I hate the fact that I used to be so callous that I would kill kind, amazing, wonderful people for a couple grand in cash...I...I...I just...Non posso neanche chiedere scusa, perché so che non è sufficiente ... Capisco se miodiano ... Dopo tutto, non aveva senso per me che tu mi ami. Ma per favore ... Non posso sopportare di perderti ..."

Gokudera rolls over and gives her his back.

"Ho bisogno di pensare per un po."

"I...Okay..." Phoenix slips off the bed, grabs her clothes and goes to take a shower. "Mi dispiace Hayato. Dal profondo del mio cuore, me dispiance."

Phoenix leaves the room and Gokudera curls up into the fetal position, whispering to himself.

"I really don't know her at all…"

Phoenix turns on the water and stands under the falling water.

"Why did I tell him…" She looks up, closing her eyes against the falling water and sings softly. "Close your eyes little girl. You're a princess now, you own this world. Twirling in your twirly dress, you're the loveliest far about the rest." Phoenix hums for a time before singing again. "Close your eyes pretty girl. 'Cause it's easier when you brace yourself. Set your thoughts on a world far off, where we only cry from joy." She hums again but suddenly sings again, louder than before. "Oh lovely and beautiful, precious and priceless. You're so much more then you know. Heart of the purest gold, pure clean and white as snow. Clothed in such splendor. Oh what a beauty for me." A choked sob makes its way past the knot forming in her throat. "Oh set apart this dream, Oh set apart this dream for me. Set apart this dream for me."

The girl sinks to the floor, wrapping her arms around herself as tears flow down her face.

Gokudera pulls the covers up and stuffs his head under the pillow as he hears her sing.

"Just…stop…I can't go to you and hug you and tall you it'll all be fine this time. No matter how much I want to. What the hell am I going to do now…"

Phoenix bites the inside of her cheek hard enough that the metallic taste of blood fills her mouth.

"Mom…I need you…I don't know what to do…What do I do…I can't deal with this Mom…I don't know how…How do you deal with breaking your own heart…"

Phoenix hums a nameless tune as she continues her silent plea, hugging her knees to her chest.

"Everywhere I turn, I hurt someone. But there's nothing I can say to change the things I've done. I'd do anything within my power I'd give everything I've got But the path I seek is hidden from me now.…I let you down. You trusted me, believed in me, and I let you down. Of all the things I hid from you, I cannot hide the shame And I pray someone, something will come, to take away the pain. There's no way out of this dark place. No hope, no future. I know I can't be free, But I can't see another way I can't face another day..."

"Mom…Dad…What do I do…?"

Gokudera bites his bottom lips so much it starts to bleed.

"She truly wanted to kill Juudaime…but she was a trained assassin before I got to know her. It's understandable…right?" He goes from biting his lip to biting his inner cheek. "Does she still feel that way?...She's changed, I'm sure…" Gokudera buries himself further into the sheets. "Why do I feel so betrayed?"

Phoenix looks up into falling water.

"Mom, Dad…I'm not smart like you and I'm not tough like you…I can't handle this anymore…I just wanna forget who I was…forget everything I did…I just want to go back to being the little spit fire princess who wandered around Chicago...I just want to be a normal girl...w-who can spend more than five minutes with her boyfriend without being eaten alive by the things she did in her past!

I don't know what to do...I need you guys now more than ever...and I don't have you...Mommy...Daddy...Where are you..."

Gokudera slowly sits up as he hears Phoenix talks to her parents and buries his face in his hands.

"Should I…?"

Phoenix wipes her face and quickly washes her hair and body.

"Can I even face him…do I even have the right to?" She turns off the water and gets dressed. "I tried to kill his best friend for money…I tried to kill him for money…Mom what do I do?" The girl almost falls to the ground bur catches herself on the sink. "Dad…I need your strength." She places her hand on the doorknob and slowly turns it. "Mom…Dad…please help me get through this…"

Gokudera glances up as he hears the door open and his heart beats rapidly. Phoenix keeps her eyes on the ground as she feels the impulse to go to Gokudera and kiss him as she normally would, but she pushes it down.

"Help me please, I'm not strong enough for this."

"Sorry I…I'll go make dinner…or…or something."