Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia

Entry two

Today was a really busy day. I'm really going to need to do a better job of not scheduling so many appointments while I'm pregnant. Anyways, my first task today was telling all my providences that I was expecting. Because I had several appointments going on later today, I decided to do this through a mass email. I figured that this way I wouldn't be on the phone talking to all of them for several hours while worrying about making all the appointments.

The second task was talking with my prime minister about how I'm pregnant. When I first found out, I had asked my doctor to not tell him since I wasn't sure what I was going to do at that point. So, now that I decided that I would be keeping the child I figured that it would be a good time to tell him.

My meeting with him began alright. We talked about the current state of affairs, what was talked about at the last world meeting, and then I decided to tell him about how I was pregnant. When he heard this, his face went completely pale. For a moment I was worried that I would need to call someone for help. Needless to say, he snapped out of it before that point. The rest of our meeting was then pretty awkward. It was not like he was angry at me or anything, at least I don't think he was, but it was obvious that he wasn't expecting me to say that. I wonder what he would think if I told him that I have been suicidal for the past few weeks. I decided to not tell him that part, after all I don't want to give the guy a heart attack.

Later that day, I had an appointment with the psychiatrist. Shortly after I got back home, I had sent my diary to her so that she could critic it and now I would be able to hear what she had to say. Somehow Papa had heard that I had a meeting with her today and had even called to make sure that I remembered to go. Maybe some of the other nations really are trying to get things right.

When I started the appointment, I was expecting her to start in by telling me everything that was wrong with me, tell me to take some drugs and a whole lot of other stuff. Instead, it was quite different. She began by asking me what I thought about the exercise. To this I told her exactly how I felt about it. How I enjoyed being able to write out my frustrations and that I started a new diary and even how the other countries read it and now know everything and so on and so on. After a while she stopped my ranting and I realized that the appointment only had ten minutes left.

"So from what it sounds like to me, you have some very rude friends that you are grateful to," she said.

To this statement I paused and thought. Am I grateful? I mean, I guess I should be. After all, if they never read my diary and got their heads out of their asses then who knows what I would have done. They most likely stopped me from causing myself all that physical pain, but does that really make up for all the years of emotional pain they made me feel beforehand?

I scheduled for another appointment in a couple weeks since she advised that was best. I don't really mind that, after all if all the appointments will be like this one, then I might grow to enjoy them. Of course that may also change when I see the bill at the end of the month.

It was already in the evening when I got back home. Since there was only myself and Kumakuma, I decided to order out for dinner. This was fine, and the evening progressed rather busily due to all the calls and emails from my curious providences. It had gotten to the point where when my phone rang for about the hundredth time that night I yelled at the receiver, "Don't you guys talk to eachother? Unless it's a life or death question just ask someone else!"

"Birdie?" The receiver asked a little cautiously. Shit. Not had I found myself prepared to yell at one of my own providences, but I hadn't even checked the caller id to see who was calling me. After I realized my mistake I promptly apologized to Prussia. In response he shook it off and told me that he was planning on being back at my place tomorrow. He then got off so that I could get some sleep.

After that, I decided that some sleep really did sound good and that the answering machine could answer the rest.

With maple syrup,

Matthew (Canada) Williams

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