Chapter 16

Stephenie Meyer is an awesome chick who last week donated money to American Red Cross. I use to work for Australian Red Cross blood bank. Whenever I did overtime I didn't put it on the books, choosing to donate my time to this worthy cause. It's not quite Stephenie's level of donation, but every bit counts. She also owns the characters and all the Twilight stuff. I just own the story, and am grateful she lets all of us in fanfic land get away with using her beautiful characters.

Hoping to be doing them justice.

~~OtA~~

BPOV

Edward's mouth was beyond believable. In the five minutes or so that they had been having a good old fashioned make-out session, he had also managed to introduce his tongue into the mix. "Hello tongue," she thought. "Nice to meet you. Meet my tongue, who is strangely attracted to the back of your teeth."

Edward's hands had slowly made their way to just above her knee, and he was now making little patterns with his fingertips. The sensation mixed with the great surge of hormones she was currently feeling towards this complicated man was making her slightly crazy. If this continued, she thought, she might lose her V-card sooner than she had hoped.

His weight on her body was a mixture of comfort, sex, and heat - a feeling she wouldn't have minded continuing without clothing.

She had turned into a sex-crazed, mindless bimbo. She didn't even know him that well! She was just grateful he wasn't stopping to suddenly declare that he was gay or pulling a Mike maneuver on her.

And then suddenly she could feel that Edward's body was in tune with her own. He stopped, mouth agape.

"Um, sorry about that." He was now making moves to extricate her body from his.

She moved with him as he sat up, her legs over his as he leaned against the couch, and she spread her arms to support herself.

"I don't want you to get the wrong idea."

Her face fell.

"Wrong idea? What the hell was the wrong idea? I mean, it wasn't a great idea but it felt kinda right..." Her voice trailed off weakly. Great, add one more to the number of men who had rejected her. She was like a pathetic discarded John West catch.

"Oh God no! Believe me I want to..." His arms wrapped around her body in attempt to stop her from moving away.

"I really want to, but we need to do this right. You deserve that. I need this to be more than sex, for both of us. Where would we go if we moved to that point straight away? I want to do this right. You deserve to be courted."

She may have blinked in a slightly spasmodic way.

"Courted? Seriously? That idea is ancient, like way ancient."

"Yeah, but despite your rather rambling insistence that you don't think this is important… it, well, it actually is. And the way I feel about you is so different than any other girl...Aww geez,I suck at being eloquent. I sound like I've already been castrated." He let go of her and ran his hand through his hair. She thought if he kept it up, he would probably be bald by 40.

"Nah, your voice is too deep for that. Romance is good. Wooing is good. Courting sounds kind of lame. Maybe it would be ok if we just said we're dating. But after all this actual 'Court' legal business is over. It's too risky."

"So how do we play this for the crowd that is about to descend?"

"I think we play it professional and keep them confused. Say as little as possible. I can't really lie all that well, so denial by omission of fallacy is probably the way to go."

"Well, we'd better go and iron our clothes, brush our hair, and get rid of my friend here." He indicated his continually evident appreciation of the time spent with Bella.

"Yeah, sorry um, big guy, But er, 'Little Edward' is all yours. How much time do we have?"

He checked his watch.

"About fifteen minutes."

"Is that enough time to fit in a few more kisses?"

"There is always room to fit in snogging."

"What the fuck is a snog?"

"Stop moving your mouth and I'll show you."

Ten minutes later they reluctantly arose from their snogging session and walked into separate bathrooms.

She thought of the movie "Shakespeare in Love". She had that glow of a woman who had been touched. Well, not touched in the sentiment that Queen Elizabeth meant, but in the sentiment that she had an excited flush to her cheeks. She realized that both of them probably looked like they were in severe like with each other and that would be obvious to their friends.

It was frustrating to not being able to just come out to her friends and say that "this one" might be "the one". Why did this particular romance have to be so fraught with potential professional and legal ramifications?

She applied some lip gloss onto her slightly swollen lips and applied a cool washcloth to her neck where Edward's permanent 5 o'clock shadow had done a nice exfoliating number to her skin. She gently touched where his lips had brushed. She instantly blushed.

"Oh fricking great, I look like a teenager in heat," she said to her reflection.

EPOV

Edward had the constant vision in his mind that this woman was the one he was going to marry and then share his DNA with ASAP. He couldn't remember when he had been more turned on over a short little snogging session that couldn't possibly lead anywhere. He finished off "little Edward" (as Bella had dubbed his cock) and continued to clean up the rest of his look. Maybe the thrill of getting caught was the reason he was so excited. Not that he really cared why. He could leave this job tomorrow, but the responsibility that he felt towards his friends and their careers kept him in Jekyll and Hyde mode. Maybe he could just run away with her, leave behind all the responsibility and be her secretary or something. Or full-time lover.

He looked at the bloke in the mirror and came to the realization that he needed her, and for her he needed to become a better man. He just needed time, and her patience. And maybe some therapy. This situation was not conducive to 'long term'. And that is what he needed and wanted Bella to be.

A knock at the door set his heart on edge. It was the end of their sanctioned time together. Now it was back to reality.

RPOV

Rosalie was not really one for apologies but she felt that she needed to apologize to Edward for threatening his manhood. In the last hour she had learned from Emmet that Edward was just the spokesman for the monster "DJ Cullen" their group created. She supposed that made him only about a third as bad as she had thought him to be. She also found that Emmet was obviously a good friend who cared about his friend's happiness.

So here she stood, knocking on a hotel door with the hulking Emmet next to her, so that she could make the her apology that she needed to and to extricate her friend from the clutches of Captain Inappropriate if she had to.

Bella answered the door and Rosalie knew immediately what they had been up to. No sex, but it must have been one good make out session. Bella's blush was present, and that only existed when the girl was embarrassed. Rose raised her eyebrows suggestively when Bella looked at her. She could tell Bella knew that she knew what the two of them had been doing.

Rose tried to hide her little smirk.

"I'm here to apologize to Mr. Cullen." She noticed the surprised look on Bella's face and quietly murmured for her to just "shut up."

Rose generally didn't apologize to anyone because normally her behavior was impeccable.

Bella stepped aside as Edward came to the door. She took a deep breath and said in an even tone, "I apologize Mr. Cullen, for upsetting you earlier. My friends mean a great deal to me, and after much consideration, I believe I may have been out of line for saying some comments relating to you and your… er… bits and my hunting knife. Please believe that I am genuinely sorry and I do regret if my actions caused you any undue distress."

"Oh Christ, Miss Hale! That sounded like what something you would write when you've lost a case and you're trying to be politically correct in a legal framework." Emmet obviously did not like her apology, but she didn't like that he was using the Lord's name in vain.

"I would ask that you refrain from swearing around me, Emmett."

Emmet was looking like he was going to implode. His vibrant white smile was being hidden by his rather large hands.

"Oh shit! Lawyer lady doesn't like swearing? Well, fuck me."

Rosalie inhaled and grasped Bella's arm at the same time, with the intention of leaving the room.

Bella piped up.

"Rosalie is a lady, Emmett. She doesn't swear. I mean, she threatens and she uses funny nicknames for reproductive organs, but she doesn't swear. You really should just shut up around her."

"Way to go Bells. Make me look like something that just stepped out of a 1930's time warp."

"Well Rosalie, you are a lady. You don't drink tea out of Styrofoam coffee cups, you wear more dresses and skirts than anyone I know, and beneath that ice queen exterior you have a lovely old-fashioned sensibility that knuckle head over there doesn't quite seem to grasp."

"I am not a knucklehead." Emmet responded. His hands clenched and unclenched as he glared at her and Bella.

"Well, then don't upset me by using foul language. It's unnecessary."

He walked over to her and towered over her fairly impressive stature.

"Fuck, fuck, fuckity fuck."

She felt ill. She weakly grabbed Bella's arm and tried to pull her to the door. Emmet stood in her path, suddenly concerned, and looking like he was contemplating touching her arms to see if she was okay. He withdrew them after deciding it was obviously not such a good idea.

"Oh man, you're serious? Really? You don't swear at all? I'm sorry, really. I was just shi...er riling you. I just can't believe you could have put terror into Ed here and not use one single swear word to do it. That's gotta be some kind of gift."

"Well, before my mother died she impressed upon me the importance of being a lady. So even though the behavior of my dad and two brothers was less than savory, I tried to maintain my mother's dignity. So, while I guess it's out of fashion these days, I try to be a lady despite the coarse profession I'm in." There. Go stick that in your pipe and smoke it Mr. Emmett Neanderthal.

"Well, I guess it IS kind of nice." Did he just say it was kind of nice?

EPOV

Oh my God. Was Emmett putting the moves on the polite castrator? This had to be stopped. Although…maybe some good would come out of this.

He looked at Bella while she watched the continuing exchange between their two wingmen.

Bella was trying to hide her face because she was amused by this turn in events too.

"I bet that you can't go one week without swearing. Everyone is so conditioned to use foul language that it's almost impossible not to," Rosalie challenged his friend.

He didn't think Emmet could go five minutes without swearing, but found this bet to be kind of interesting.

"All right, but I bet in that same week I can make YOU swear. At least one little modern curse word." Emmet challenged.

"Can we put this on air? Let's say the loser pays $2,000 to the winner's favorite charity." He had a plan.

"You're on!" Emmett replied with enthusiasm.

"It will be my pleasure to take your money Mr. Neanderthal." Rosalie extended her hand to Emmett so they could shake on the deal.

"How about we all go out to dinner and get this bet started off right?" It would be a win-win. More time with Bella, sanctioned by her friends and his, and tomorrow the radio station would know about his new little side gimmick. All time spent with Bella could now be clearly accounted for. At least for the next week.

Win-Win.

~~OtA~~

Thanks to my Beta -FicObsessed and Pre-reader Elaine 67- for some reason I found this a difficult chapter to write. So you know the drill, reviewers for this chapter get a little treat from the next chapter...