Not mine, not for profit, yadda yadda.

Chapter 13

"The kitchen is here on the left and the bathroom at the end of the hall." Xiao Tao was giving Ranma and Ryoga the guided tour. The rear of the clinic opened into a living space where the old woman lived with her grandson. "Up the stairs over here are the bedrooms." She continued as she lead them to the upper level. "This one is Iichiro's room, mine is down the hall," Ranma noted that they had passed a room that the old midwife hadn't made mention of before arriving at the end of the hall. "and this will be your room." She said as she turned the handle and went inside.

Ranma looked around the room, it was sparsely decorated, but it was a step up from her room at the Tendos. There was an actual bed in the corner, a luxury that was almost completely foreign to Ranma. She sat her pack next the wardrobe and proceeded to sit on the bed, so soft, she laid down and nearly lost herself in comfort. Ryoga snapped her back to reality though.

"Uh, so where will I be staying?" He asked nervously. He was uncomfortable, he didn't know this woman at all and didn't want to be an imposition.

The old woman's mouth quirked up in the corner and an amused glint lit up her eyes. "The bed is a double." She replied, a touch of humour lacing her voice.

Ranma sat up straight as a rod and Ryoga nearly fell over. "What?" They exclaimed simultaneously.

"Oh please, given the circumstances, it would be pointless to separate you. It's not like you can get into any more trouble." She waved her hand dismissively, but her continued grin clearly indicated that she knew full well that was not the reason for their outburst.

"What about that other room down the hall?" Ranma asked. She was curious as to why the old woman hadn't made any mention of what was in there during her little tour.

The joviality on the old woman's face was replaced by a hard expression. "You would do well to stay out of that room. Terrible things will happen to whomever enters it." A chilly and dangerous aura wafted off the old midwife that made both Ryoga and Ranma shiver involuntarily. They both gulped and nodded in understanding. The aura fled as rapidly as it appeared and the smile returned to the midwife's face, "Well then, I'll just let the two of you settle in."

After the door closed behind her, Ranma and Ryoga just looked at each other, glanced at the bed, then looked away. "Look," Ranma started, deciding that they may as well just get this over with, "we slept next ta each other the whole time we were camping, right?" It was true, there hadn't been much of a gap between their sleeping bags, the tent had been small, it had been easier to travel with that way. "So this really ain't much different." She still wasn't looking at him as she spoke. "There's blankets in the corner, so it ain't like we gotta share or nothin'." She nodded to herself, That's right, this ain't nothin'.

"Yeah." Ryoga agreed. He was glad that Ranma was still avoiding looking his way, because he could feel the blush rising to his cheeks. He looked away from her and examined the room, until his eyes drifted over her pack. "Uh, Ranma,"

"Yeah?" She asked, finally looking up at him.

He shuffled his feet and scratched the back of his head, he was sure she wouldn't like what he was about to say. "I, uh, my bag… It's still at the Tendos'." He hadn't grabbed it while Ranma was there because he didn't want her to know he was following her, and he didn't grab it after she left because if he had taken his eyes off her for a second, he would never have been able to find her again.

"Oh." She said, looking up and realizing that he was still wearing her clothes. She really didn't want to go back to the Tendos' again, every trip risked her being caught and would inevitably end with someone wanting answers. She couldn't just leave him without his stuff though. She sighed, "Ok, just let me get changed first." With everything that had been going on, she hadn't changed out of the maid costume. There was no way she was going back out dressed like that.

Ryoga nodded, but just kept standing by the door. She raised her eyebrow at him, crossed her arms and tapped her foot on the floor impatiently. "Oh, uh, right." He muttered as he left the room.

Akane was unsure of who she could confide in at the moment. She was so distressed that she was barely holding herself together. She wasn't sure if she wanted to cry or break something, not that she hadn't cried a good deal already during her walk. She knew that she couldn't let her father or the Saotomes know what was going on, that would be a death sentence for Ranma. As angry as she was, she still didn't want him- her- whatever dead.

Looking back now, she was sure that Nabiki had known, many of her classmates had attempted to back out of her betting pools after the fiasco at the café. Nabiki had asked them, with a predatory grin, "I asked when Ranma's baby was due. Did I ever mention Shampoo?" The students had shaken their heads. "Then I asked if Ranma or Ryoga was the father. Was Shampoo mentioned that time?" They shook their heads again. "So then, since Ranma is still set to have a baby, and Ryoga, has been revealed to be the father, the bets stand." There were groans all around, very few people had bet on Ryoga. She did notice Gosunkugi doing a happy dance, but after saying something to Nabiki, he fell into depression. Any other day Akane might have tried to cheer him up, but not today, she was too miserable herself.

As she entered her family's home, she realized that there had really only ever been one option. She crept quietly through the house, Genma and Soun were sitting out on the deck playing shogi, which she was thankful for, as they failed to notice her as she checked the kitchen for her eldest sister. It was empty however, so Akane turned back and nearly collided with Nodoka who was entering behind her.

"Oh, sorry Akane dear, I wasn't looking where I- Oh, dear, have you been crying?" Asked Nodoka, having just noticed Akane's reddened eyes.

"Crying?" Asked Soun as he burst into the kitchen.

"What has the boy done now?" Genma wondered aloud.

"What more could he possibly do? That- That- PERVERT! It's sick is what it is! I can't believe he- I mean I knew he was a pervert but- ARGH!" She wanted to vent her frustrations so badly, but these were not the right people. Thankfully the person she wanted to see most right then came to investigate the commotion.

"Oh my! Akane, you poor thing, come with me and we'll get you cleaned up." Kasumi handed her youngest sister a handkerchief and led her out of the kitchen. She sent a look back over her shoulder that told the adults not to follow them. A look like that from Kasumi was not to be ignored.

Nodoka looked at the two men in front of her, "What's going on here?"

Genma put his hands up in front of himself defensively, "Now, now, it's not that bad."

"Not that bad? not THAT bad?" Soun shouted at his long-time friend, "Your son is cheating on my sweet Akane and you say 'It's not that bad'?"

Nodoka gasped, "Is this true?" She asked Genma.

"You know how boys are, he's just sowing some wild oats." Genma tried to play it off, but inside he was panicking, he was rapidly losing control of the situation, and after I'd finally settled Soun down too, he sighed internally, he had no idea how he was going to get himself and the boy out of this one.

"The girl is pregnant Saotome!" Soun continued to wail.

Nodoka gasped again, "Are you sure?"

"The boy hasn't been home yet to ask, it could just be childish speculation and rumours. You know how kids are." A bead of sweat rolled down his neck.

Her brow furrowed, "Hmm… I can't say that I approve, but a healthy young man does have needs. Perhaps he just wanted to preserve Akane's honour until marriage?" The crease in her brow smoothed, "Yes, that would be the manly thing to do. Alright, we will wait and hear Ranma's explanation before doing anything rash." Of course she hoped that there was a misunderstanding, she was loathe to the idea of her first born grandchild being illegitimate if it turned out to be true, none of her options were ideal. Firstly of course, Ranma could simply deny the child, the brunt of the societal implications would fall on the mother and Ranma would be free to do as he pleased. That option grated against her personal moral code however. The second option, would be to make an arrangement with the mother that would allow Ranma and Akane to raise the child. She was certain that Ranma would be amenable, but Akane was willful and would need some convincing. The final option of course was to force Ranma to marry the girl, but given the number of manipulative suitors Ranma had, she found it likely that this may have been the girl's intention all along. Hmm, in that case, option one might not be so bad… She excused herself to go and meditate on the matter, it was not something to be thought over lightly.

Once again that day, Genma relaxed, enjoying his brief respite. If everything fell apart, he'd be forced out on the street, or worse, forced to live with Nodoka. He eyed his wife's retreating form, she had lived with them here temporarily after Ranma's overzealous suitors had wrecked her house, but she had developed a bit of an independent streak during his absence. She had attempted to get Genma to move into an apartment with her, but when it became apparent that she expected him to get a real job to cover half of the expenses, he insisted that he was needed here to help oversee Ranma and Akane's relationship. She had instead found a single apartment and maintained it herself with her family's money. Money that she had been forbidden to share with Genma by her father on the day of their marriage. No one told Genma about the agreement until after the 'I dos', much to his chagrin.

"-and he didn't deny it. I mean, I always knew he was a pervert, but I never thought it was this bad." Akane had just finished her retelling of the afternoon's events to Kasumi, who had patiently listened while her sister cried, lamented, ranted and fumed.

Kasumi stroked her sister's hair in a motherly manner and in a gentle voice said, "Akane, I know it must hurt that Ranma did this while you were still engaged, you have every right to be mad about that. However, I want you to think for a minute. When you thought Ranma just wanted to be a girl, you were happy for her and wanted to be her friend." Akane opened her mouth to object that the situation was different now, but Kasumi quieted her with a stern look. "If Ranma wanted to be a girl, was a girl, is a girl then what would be the problem with her liking boys?" Kasumi was tempted to add that just whom a person liked didn't matter, be it boy or girl, but she didn't want to push Akane too far all at once. She knew Akane was a sweet girl, but she was equally as stubborn.

Akane's mouth opened, but this time she found herself with nothing to say. It was true, she had been happy thinking of Ranma as a girl. If any of her other girlfriends liked boys, and she generally assumed they did, she would think nothing of it. If they had found themselves in Ranma's current situation, she would have been sympathetic rather than revolted. When she thought back over the day's events, she recalled the look on Ranma's face right before she had fled. Heartbroken, absolutely heartbroken, and Akane knew that her rejection was responsible for that. I'm a terrible friend. Akane hugged her sister and went to take a bath. She needed a good long soak to think, she was still angry over Ranma's betrayal. Even if Ranma did like boys, it was not ok to do that sort of thing when you had a fiancée. However, Akane knew that she had hurt Ranma just as badly in return. She wanted to apologize, but if she tracked down Ranma now in her current state of confusion and anger, she'd say something that she would regret later. She needed to clear her head first.

Genma noticed that something was off the second he opened the bedroom door. Ranma's drawers were open and the travelling pack that belonged to the boy was not sitting in the corner. Genma wondered briefly if the boy had run off on another training mission, but decided that it was unlikely. On closer inspection he noticed that everything was gone, including the boy's girlier belongings. Genma had only ever opened that drawer once, by accident, and was so disturbed and ashamed that he never opened it again. He may have also yelled, just a little bit, and thrown Ranma out the window for leaving such embarrassing possessions laying around where anyone could find them. He looked at the drawer now, open and bare, Ranma wouldn't have taken the contents of that drawer on a training trip. Genma scanned the room carefully for any remaining signs of his son, but found none. The only thing that did not belong to himself or the Tendos was Ryoga's backpack.

Worry gripped him once again, if this keeps up, I'm going to have a heart attack. The most likely scenario in Genma's mind, was that the boy had run off with Shampoo. He sighed as he sat in the corner, if that was the case, then his freeloading off the Tendos would come to an end. He doubted very much that Cologne would let him leech off of them, but Shampoo would likely do anything to keep her 'Airen' happy. Free ramen for life didn't really sound that bad. His thoughts were disturbed by a rustling in the tree outside, followed by soft footfalls indicating that someone and entered the room through the window.

"Boy, explain yourself." He said, looking up at Ranma.

Ranma was surprised to see her father sitting in the corner, from outside the room had looked empty. She shuffled out of the way to make room for Ryoga to jump through the window and whispered, "Shh, keep your voice down Pop, if ya don't wanna die."

A dangerous look crossed over Genma's face, "Are you threatening me, Boy?"

Soun, who had been walking down the hallway, heard voices in the Saotome's guestroom and burst through the door. "You!" He said in an accusatory voice, "You had better explain yourself."

Both Ranma and Ryoga pressed their fingers to their lips, "Shhhh!" they hissed in unison.

Now on his feet, Genma stood over Ranma looking intimidating, "Don't you Shush me, Boy!"

Whispering as loudly and furiously as she dared, Ranma replied, "If mom hears ya and comes up here, we're both gonna get it." She emphasized her point by drawing her finger over her throat.

This shut the two men up, but it was too late, Nodoka came rushing through the door. "Oh Ranma, you must clear this misunderstanding up quickly. Tell us everything. Who is this girl? Do you love her? Is she truly with child? What about Akane? Will you marry her? Shall we set a date? What of the child? Would you raise it with Akane? Haven't you had enough of training as a girl yet?" The woman had gone red in the face from asking so many questions without taking a breath. She gasped a few times for air and looked as though she was about to continue, but was interrupted by Genma.

"Nodoka, Dear, this really is a sensitive topic, you may hear far more than you want to know. How about you let Tendo and myself here talk to the boy, we'll get the answers we need and sort this whole mess out." Genma had an inkling now that things were far more serious than he had previously believed if Ranma thought that Nodoka might carry out her pledge. What has the boy done now? He had to get rid of his wife before finding out though.

Ranma, who looked as though she wanted melt into the floorboards, was relieved when after a few minutes of quiet bickering, her father convinced her mother that this was a discussion best left to the 'men'. She did tell Ranma that they would have to discuss the situation later on though, but Ranma had no intention of sticking around.

The door clicked as Nodoka left and they all sat down and waited until they could no longer hear her retreating footsteps. When he was sure that they could no longer be overheard, Genma cleared his throat, "Now, Boy, why do you think your mother is going to enforce the seppuku pact?"

Soun however had asked a question at the same time, "Ranma, is that Shampoo girl really pregnant?"

Ignoring her father's question for the time being, Ranma answered Soun's because it was easier, "It's just one of her tricks. She figured that if she said that in public I'd have ta marry her."

Ranma found herself caught up in a hug by the older man, "Oh what joy! To know that this was all a misunderstanding and that you didn't cheat on my Akane!" Tears of happiness were streaking down his face.

"Er..." A distinctly uncomfortable expression settled onto Ranma's face as Soun dislodged himself and she rubbed her arm self-consciously. "Uh... heh."

Tears of joy turned to tears of distress, "No! Tell me you didn't, son." Soun cried dramatically.

Genma nodded in understanding, "So you have been carrying on an affair with the girl."

"No way! I ain't never touched her!" Ranma yelled defensively.

"Ukyo then?" Genma asked. He could live with a lifetime of okonomiyaki if it came to that.

"Pops!"

"The gymnast then?" She was the only other girl in Ramna's life that Genma could remember. She was completely insane though. Oh, perhaps… "Did she paralyse you?" He pulled something from behind his back, "Show me on this doll where she touched you!"

Ranma smacked the toy out of his hand. "Jeez! Knock it off already would ya, Pop? It wasn't any of them!"

Genma and Soun leaned forward in anticipation, Soun had even forgotten his misery temporarily as he waited expectantly for Ranma's answer. He could think of no other likely candidates for the boy's affections, and there was nothing like a good mystery to distract a troubled mind.

Ranma glanced sideways at the boy beside her, he had remained silent the whole time and was sitting rigidly. She sighed, I suppose they'll find out eventually… "It was Ryoga, but it wasn't our-"

Before she could continue, the two fathers blinked, blinked again, then both burst into laughter. Genma went so far as to roll on the floor in his amusement, he was taking deep gasping breaths between guffaws. "You got me there, Boy." He wheezed several minutes later, "Really had me going." He added, his breathing coming under control. "Now who was it really?" He asked as he finally righted himself.

"It was Ryoga, but there were these mush-" She tried again to give her excuses, but it was to no avail. Two angry auras suddenly stood over her, Soun's giant samurai head and Genma's large panda form.

"How could you!" Soun demanded of her.

"You are no son of mine." Genma burned with rage.

Genma stepped forward to beat some sense into the foolish boy that was currently a threat to his very life. "Stop." Ryoga shouted, it was the first time he'd opened his mouth since entering the house. "She's pregnant."

"You..." Genma exclaimed as he pulled Ryoga to his feet. "You violated my daughter!" He roared irrationally, then proceeded to kick Ryoga out the window. He grabbed a very confused Ranma up in a hug and rocked her back and forth, "That bad boy won't touch you again, Daddy's here." Ranma was completely bewildered by the 180 degree turn that Genma's fury had taken.

Soun slumped against the wall, this was simply too much for him to take.

Genma finally noticed what he was doing and snapped out if it. -cough- "Yes, well, there is only one possible course of action. You've got to be a man, suck it up," he paused for effect, "and run for your life. Run, son. Run far and run fast before your mother finds out about this"

Ranma was thrown completely for a loop, "You mean you're not disowning me?"

"I- I don't know, but right now, you have to go." He replied. Before your mother kills us both…

Ranma grabbed Ryoga's pack, which was exceedingly heavy, took one last confused look back at her father and hopped out the window.

Soun muttered, "I can't believe you're ok with this Saotome."

"He's carrying my grandchild Tendo, I'm not heartless." He answered as though it were the most natural thing in the world. I wonder if that Kuno would still want to marry the boy in his condition, he is awfully wealthy after all… Then again, I haven't a clue about Ryoga's parents, for all I know, they could be loaded…

"That's very mature of you." Soun praised his life-long friend, having not been privy to his internal musings. A dark cloud soon settled over him though, he lowered his head in disappointment. This day had gone from bad to worse in the blink of an eye. Salvaging the situation seemed nigh impossible, he could only hope that- "What are you doing?"

"Packing." Genma replied as he shoved his belongings into his rucksack. "If Nodoka were to find out…" He shuddered. "Tell her we've gone on a camping trip, or something."

"Oh no you don't." Soun snatched the bag from Genma's hand. "You've got to help me think of a way to fix this mess. Besides, if you both disappear, Nodoka will start to get suspicious. If you stay, you can cover for Ranma until we come up with a plan that will end with Ranma and Akane marrying."

Genma sighed, his old friend was delusional if he thought there was still a chance at a wedding between their children, not that he planned to tell him so. Soun made a good point however, he could stay and shield his only child and grandchild, from Nodoka for the time being. He couldn't see how this could possibly end well, but improvising, lying and when all else failed, running like Hell was the Saotome way. Somehow, he thought, they'd manage.