Chapter 6
Title as Mates: Part 2

~Beatriz~

If I ever ask anyone about sickness, the majority of it probably seeks to avoid such circumstances (except if you have such weird things about illness and pain… okay… probably too much absurd mystery novels) and that also included me. I never really liked getting myself sick, for the main reason it rendered me helpless to do anything on my own (thought I am sure no one like getting sick, aside from the fact that some of you might want to get one in purpose to skip school… or work…). Yes, I am completely aware about this biological disturbance is somewhat unavoidable for every single organism in this planet (maybe that's not applicable for viruses and some microorganisms), yet again, I never liked the fact that I can be easily doom in that helpless situation.

It didn't help when I recalled the fragments of nightmare back then when I was spending summer in Rio, the time when I also got myself sick from the unstable weather that occupies Rio (thanks global warming!), an apparition manifested from my deepest fear; loneliness.

I recalled lucidly being awaken in the dim room where its walls made from the black, crystalline obsidian stone. The spell of silence was casted upon the room where the floor was icy cold, and I was there, struggling to get back on my feet before scrutinized the alien surrounding. The terrorizing fact inflicted deep into my soul as I realized I was alone in within the darkness, as no sole clues seems to point the existences of living being other than me.

I could see black fingers of rotten tree sprouting outside the crystal clear window, but unable to break the material forcing me to dwell deeper into the darkness and looked for explanation.

"Mom? Dad? Carla? Tiago? Frost?" I remember calling their names as I descended into darkness, but the only reply was the distorted echo of my voice.

My tentative steps were halted as I felt the darkness thickened suddenly with a low disembodied whispering reverberated through my eardrum. I rotated my head and saw the pitch blackness already obscured my path, camouflaging every direction with the black display that started to overwhelmed my nerves; and it did, sending me a blast of immense vertigo.

I shook my head as my heartbeat galloped rapidly, trying to escape the duskiness that slowly dissipated my focus. The whispering voices then intensified before they let the silence be the rightful king, empowering the eerie atmosphere of the alien world.

And a brief thunderous boom was the catalyst I required to scream my heart out and flapped my wings as fast as I can.

My coordination was impaired thanks to the raging headache that occupied my head, and to my horror when I realized my wings' feathers had disintegrated into thin air, hurling me back into the cold floor for darkness to consume.

I never believed in superstitious and ghost (even after reading that ghost, goblins and ghoulish figure book did give me a little chill) but that time was my logical side eclipsed under the umbra of my fear, and no one was around to help me.

I was all alone.

The whispering voices resumed as I groaned from the pain after my freefall, their words were incomprehensible, almost like hearing an incantation from the lost civilization during their ritual. Without a second thought, I quickly lifted myself from the freezing surface and rushed to run before the world around me was nothing than a blackness, a void, and no matter how fast, how I tried to run, the feeling of staying in one place never left me.

Hope had left me; fear had consumed me; sanity had lost me; specters of nightmare rejoice upon their conquest.

And I was there, crying…

…crying for my fate.

…crying for I will face the Grim reaper alone.

…crying for I trapped under the solitude of darkness…

Before a burst of sunbeam welcomed me back into the real world with a familiar male voice singing while soothing me:

Moonbeams and Starlight, magical twilight.
The warmest ray, hear it whispering your name.
Rainbows at midnight, sparkling night sky.
Don't go away,
Stay another day…

He continued to hum the tunes as he caressed my head, an act of affection that manage to exorcise specters of nightmares that once possessed my mind. I opened my eyes and saw him looked at me with a concerned face, thought, it didn't last very long as I hastily wrapped my wings and cried my heart out.

He hugged me back and whispered, "Hey it's okay… it's just a bad dream." He caressed my back and nuzzled my head, "It's not real."

His words failed to overcome shards of fear from the fragments of my nightmare; I even recalled my jarring wings as I tried to convince myself with his words.

He stayed there, letting me stained his plumages, only tightened his grip to unleash the warmth of his love and let me know he was there for me, and it succeeded to dissipate my fear into mere memories.

"You okay?" He asked as my sobbing receded.

I could only nod weakly, not yet letting go of him.

"Do you… want to talk about it?"

I shook my head this time, fearing if recalling those memories will inflict more damage me.

"Okay." He said patiently, placing his wings on my head, "Seems like you are still burning up… how do you feel?"

"Hurt… afraid…" I replied with a fragile voice.

He sighed, leveling his gaze with mine, "Hey… it's okay… it's all over now."

I went into silence (you wish Frost… You just don't know how mentally degenerating the experience is…), trying to calm myself by burying my face onto his chest, smelling his natural aroma to remind me that this one was no more a mirage of my nightmare, but a reality where I wasn't alone.

I am not alone, and I've never been.

"Maybe Tulio have something to help you." He said as he unfurled his wings and prepared to take a flight, "Stay here for a bit… I'll be back soon."

"NO! please… don't leave me alone…" I said, holding him tighter, "Please… don't leave me alone again…"

I could detect a frown on his face before he replied, "Are you sure you don't want to talk about it? Seems like something is really bothering your mind right now?"

I reluctantly shook my head, "Just… stay with me…"

"Okay, Beatriz. I'm staying." He said lovingly.

I donned myself a smile as he placed me back on my "bed" and sighed, "You shouldn't have stayed up that late…"

"What… happened?" I asked with a hoarse voice (and it makes me so helpless… gah…).

"Well," He shrugged, "I don't exactly know what happened, but when we watched that movie last night, you just seemed so quiet… and when I checked what happened to you, it turned out you have a fever."

"Oh…"

"I probably took responsible for this too…" He said sheepishly, "If I wasn't so eager to watch that movie, you probably won't end up here."

I placed my wing on his face and replied, "It's the weather to blame… I usually get… sick… when the weather… uuhhh." I moaned in pain as my headache flaring up.

He sighed, "You know… I think it would be better if I just call Tulio so he can give you something to help you."

With a wing on my head, I stated, "I'm… just… don't leave me alone… I'm afraid…"

"Nightmares?"

I issued a double nod.

"Want to talk about it?"

Again, I shook my head reluctantly, "I don't know… I don't want to remember it again…"

"Maybe it will go away if you talk it with someone." He then playfully observed every corner of the room before looking back at me, "And looks like I am your only options."

I chuckled, "Well…"

I began to reminisce the nightmare that recently put my soul into restlessness, retelling every details on how I was bizarrely awakened within the dark room with no one else. I vividly recalled the adrenaline rush I got when I realized something was hunting for me, something that hidden within the shadow, only time will tell when it will leap upon me. My tears welled up when I remembered the cold solitude as I run endlessly inside the ethereal darkness, a void.

He wiped my tears and embraced me tightly, addressing his apology for making me remember something I wanted to forget. My face was buried onto his chest as I heard him uttered, "Bia, I'm sorry…"

"I'm sorry… it must be very unpleasant, but…" He lifted my stained face, kissing my forehead before adding, "You are not alone… I'm here… next to you."

My stomach had butterflies as I registered his words, filling my mind if utmost serenity from the spell of nightmare finally lifted from me. I donned myself a smile, a sincere smile when I felt another kiss on my cheek.

A creak from the main door's hinges soon heard as a middle-aged Brazilian ornithologist entered the room, "Hello there, Bia, Frost." Tulio greeted us as he put his clipboard to the table, "Feeling any better?"

Frost motioned his wings on my head with a squawk (which is actually he said "Not good.") to emphasis my lingering headache. Tulio then nodded (although, I am not sure if he understood Frost or not), "I will give you some medicine to help you sleep." He hummed a Samba tune I heard from the carnival as he went to the medicine cabinet.

Hearing the word 'sleep' lashed me another anxiety. I began to tremble violently with the prospect of returning back into my nightmare. Frost noticed my condition and asked, "You okay sweetheart?"

I gave him no reply and just staring at the possibilities of dreading nightmare. Sleep was no longer restorative as it should be. Frost patiently repeated his questions, "Bia… you okay?"

Snapped out of my trance, I replied, "No, I am not okay… I don't want to sleep again…"

He cocked his head, "But you need to sleep to recover, right?"

"I don't want to go back there…"

His eyes widened as he – I assumed – realized the reasons of my actions and words, "Oh…"

"I don't want to go back there… please don't make me go there…" I repeated in horror.

He scratched his nape with his talon, caressing my head with his wings, "Okay… okay… I get it…"

"If I sleep with you, will it chase away the nightmare?" He offered after ruminating for a while.

I don't know to be honest, but feeling his warmth might decrease the chance of my next dream will be another nightmare; and for that, I bobbed my head, "It might work."

He beamed as he positioned himself next to me, unfurling his wing for me to snuggle with his body in the gap between his wing and body.

I exhaled one exhilarated sigh as his warmth began to seep into my body, knowing that his presence was near. My tranquil mind allowed me to regain my basic abilities and recalled one thing I was going to ask, "Frost?"

"Yeah?"

"When I woke up… why did you sing that song?"

He covered his face ashamedly and before answered, "It was meant to calm you… because I heard your Mom sang that for you." He sighed in defeat and resumed, "And it seemed, what I did was waking you up."

His sincere intention made the butterflies in my stomach fluttered faster, "I rather hear your off-tune voice than remained in that nightmare to be honest."

"Thank you… I'm going to take that as a sarcasm masked as a compliment."

I chortled, tickled with my own unintended joke.

Tulio then reappeared around one minute since our last conversation with a bottle of medicine in his hand. I saw him pour the orange-colored liquid to a measuring spoon before he passed it down to my beak, "Here it is."

I gladly swallowed the – turns out it also orange-flavored – medicine before squawking as a sign of my gratitude towards him. Tulio gave me a warm smile as he patted my head softly, "You two reminds me a lot of your parents, Bia."

I twisted my neck and saw Frost had taken a head start into the realm of slumber; my mind baffled on just how fast he fell asleep.

"He must be so tired after staying awake the whole night…" Tulio said, "Looks like he will be a good mate for you." He exited the room and let me alone, pondering with my heart glowed intensely.

He slept like a log, oblivious to my watchful eyes.

Staying up all night just for me, typical you, Frost. I mused as I gazed up at the ceilings. You'd always been such a fool; you know that?

I pecked his cheek gently, resulting a sweet smile manifested on his face, At least I know one thing.

I chuckled internally, looking at his scar. I know you love me until you want to sacrifice anything to me… but…

My smile distorted into a frown at the thought, recalling the feeling of trapped within aloofness. I whispered, "Promise me…"

"Promise me that you will never leave me alone, even it was another sacrifice you did for me."

"I need you, Frost. Don't you ever leave me."

My headache had been cleared when my consciousness returned back into reality, slowly restoring my abilities as my brain completed to do a cold boot. The blurry vision didn't last long after I rubbed my weary eyes with my wings and realized my mate wasn't on our nest.

I yawned briefly before I could feel a cool breeze ruffled me plumages, reminded me of the recent rain that happened before I escaped into the realm of slumbers. My eyes rapidly examined the blackened room – thanks to the gloomy atmosphere outside – trying to spot my mate, but to no avail, there wasn't a sole clue about his presence.

I vaguely recalled when he offered me an herb-like medicine, which I assumed was the reason why my headache cleared in an amazing rate compared to my usual recovery speed (which usually takes one to two days).

"Frost?" I whispered, waiting for his response. "Frost?"

My voice echoed through the seemingly empty hollow as a gust of freezing winds causing me to shiver. "Frost? Where are you?" I said in desperation.

Trying to calm my nerves isn't easy when my emotion is incredibly unstable. I remembered how exaggerated my actions this morning when I realized Frost wasn't anywhere in the hollow, and I learned a fact he promised this morning, that he will never leave me.

I believe his words, his sincerity dissipated the clouds of doubt that once raging on my head. And to confirm it, I finally saw him perching on the entrance of our hollow in a gargoyle-esque position and – I assumed – staring at the gray skies that slowly thinned.

I took a slow step towards him before I stumbled upon a collection of leaves with a puddle of rainwater beneath it. I lifted the plant for further examination and realized it was the one he gave me to ease my headache (documented for future usage). The state of the plant, however, made me cringe.

I left the plant on the floor and rushed towards Frost, glimpsed over his darker shades of blue than the rest of his body, confirming my suspicion about how he acquired the herbs in the first place. Reluctantly, however, I placed my wings on his forehead to fill the last piece of the mental puzzle I was trying to solve, but his temperature was thankfully normal.

I let myself let out a sigh of relief, but my soul still restless from his recklessness.

And it also gave me butterflies in my stomach.

My feelings were volatile: I want to smile as bright as the sun, but at the same time, I also want to dig myself a hole as in Armageddon will soon commence.

His actions make me happy, because I know I have someone that look up after me, a bird that won't let me alone in the pitch freezing blackness; a bird that does not hesitate to tell the world I am his mate, and he loves me deeply as deep as the Mariana trench.

But at the same time, I'm afraid. I'm afraid his actions; his sacrifices he has done to me will one day take him away from me. I know he will even dare to trade place with me if I stumbled upon hell, but he didn't know that I don't want that.

I want him, as my mate, to cheer our limited together.

He is my mate, I love him. Oh I love him so much…

I opened my eyes as I realized I had involuntary closed them, feeling the tears tempted to burst out from the incompatible emotions that was raging on my heart. I exhaled on sharp breath before I turned my eyes into the masculine figure of my mate, still closing his eyes.

I rested my head on his nape, ruminating about the title we just recently gave each other, a title as mates.

He is your mate.

I know.

And you finally stepped into that decision?

It bounds to happen anyway.

But it can be regretful…

I'm aware of that.

And you don't regret it?

I don't know… I'm still afraid.

He will leave you?

Yeah.

But you know he loves you, right?

Yes.

Do you love him?

Of course.

It is what truly matters.

"But what if…"

I want to believe it, the voices from my heart.

But the series of 'what if', his actions…

I can't escape from the prison of algorithm and logic.

I snapped out of my trance when I felt his neck moved slightly, signifying his arrival back into the real world. The intrusion, however, did not make me remove my head from his nape, instead, I rubbed it lovingly with his soft, messy feathers of his neck.

I cooed as I felt his beak nuzzled my head, "So the princess finally awake?"

"I am no longer a princess." I replied, "I am a queen; your queen."

"Aw… thanks a lot, love." He yawned before added, "I take it your headache finally subside?"

"Yes, I can no longer feel that annoying throb in my skull, and… Frost?"

"Mmhmm?"

"We need to talk, about something."

He cocked his head before replied, "Wait…"

His face lit up and his beak beamed widely, "You… have eggs?"

"No." I said with my face flushed red, "At least, not yet…"

"Oh." His smile dimmed, "So what is it?"

"I want you to answer it honestly." I stated as I reached for the abandoned plant earlier, "Where did you find this plant?"

His talon nervously scratched his nape, "Why did you ask that… I don't think it's…"

"Please, Frost."

He sighed, "Healer's hollow."

"But that is at least seven trees from here… and it was raining."

"It's just a little rain… you don't have to worry about that."

I shook my head, "You don't need to lie to me… I heard the thunder, and judging by your damp feathers, it must be raining heavily."

"No…"

"Do I need to include the approximation on how long I slept to prove my point?" I countered, "Please be honest with me."

"Why did you stupidly fly in the rain? You know you can get sick or worse, like that one in Rio."

"Okay, okay…" He stated before admitted, "I can't stand seeing you writhing in pain, so I think it would be best if I just find something to help you."

"The rain wasn't really strong…" He paused briefly before resumed, "You know… you don't really have to worry about-"

"BUT I SHOULD!" I shouted, "I SHOULD WORRY ABOUT YOU!"

"You don't have to yell; you know that?" He snarled and his eyes narrowed, "I can hear."

My breathing became rapid for my unstable emotions transformed into the inexorable anger, "YOU ARE MY MATE FOR GOODNESS SAKE! I SHOULD HAVE WORRIED ABOUT YOU."

"I should have…" I said softly, having the anger evaporated in all of the sudden.

We stood there in frigid silence before Frost decided to break the ice, "Done yelling?"

I only huffed, avoiding his eye contact that could be a hostile gaze – but I never know.

"Bia." He started, "I am doing this for you."

"I love you, I love you so much."

"I can't stand seeing you in pain, it aches me, it tears me apart."

"But that's not a reason to act reckless!" I replied with a slight hostility, still avoiding eye contact with him, "You are my mate… and you know I love you…"

"I don't want to lose you… especially because of me."

My tears welled up in an instant regret washed over me, the reason of this unnecessary argument was utterly foolish. Still, I tried to suck up the heavy waters that occasionally leaked from my eyes.

He seemed to notice my tears when his wings lifted my face; I finally saw his face full of hurt and worry, "Even if I was doing this for you?"

"I don't accept any reason."

"But-"

"I. Don't. Accept. Any. Reason." I emphasized each words with a tap of my wing.

"Okay." He muttered gently.

The silence once more blanketed the room, only the ambience from the outside was the source of noise, but I believed my sense of hearing has been muted temporary until he spoke up. "Bia."

I averted my gaze on the ground, not wanting to hear nor see any more of his reasons.

Suddenly, I felt his wings grasped my body, causing my gaze to be automatically facing him.

Our beaks touched, in one passionate kiss.

My shock rapidly replaced with ecstasy, a form of his – maybe our – love in a simple, yet powerful blast.

My anger vanished, my clouds of doubt and uncertain emotions dissipated as we pulled out of each other and relishing each other's love remains within our respective beaks.

"Bia."

Unable to avert my gaze this time, I locked my eyes with his. "I love you. I just want you to have a peaceful sleep without worry about anything."

"You know I love you too… and we are mates." I replied, "And mates worry for each other."

"Please promise me you won't be reckless, in any reason."

"I can't promise you." He said, causing fear to occupy my heart, "But I will try my best."

"You better try your damn best, Frost." I threatened as I crumpled down to his chest, "Or I will find you and rip you apart."

"Doesn't that means you are also a danger for me?"

Maybe I was being paranoid, maybe I was being a drama queen, but his actions are not without consequences.

And I fear the worst of all…

A\N: This might take longer than it seems, I tell you why, maybe because I was losing this vibe in Rio. But here it is, I hate to break it into more parts than I just had.

Regarding Winter's Summer, yes, I am going to continue it, in fact, the script was being written the moment you read this Author's note (if you read it that is).

anyway, please review to save a writer.

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