Heart Attacks

Author's Ramblings: I had a fanfic fan (weir to say but it's true; I have a fan!) come over to my house and actually say this: So ehrm… WHEN ARE YOUFINISHING YOUR STORIES!
I laughed of course and, after cowering for a while in fear of getting murdered and sold as dumplings, decided that I should probably quit this whole fanfic-writer-or-death nonsense. It's just a quick thought, don't' worry I'm still considering it…
Oh by the way; please-oh-pretty-please don't flame me for this. I wrote it around two years ago and just fish it out of my old hard drive. I just gave it a few touches and decided to post it as is.
And yes, I am procrastinating from my other fic (Sorcerer's Apprentice) Monster in the Closet.
Enjoy!

Safely on his side of the table he thought that what she was currently eating lead to two possible outcomes: Death by starvation or the need to brawn. Sure it looked good with the glittering dressing, the bits of croutons standing in a shinning mess and the sorry excuse for a grilled chicken breast but those things gave no support to a healthy body; especially a hungry one.

Pepper and the entire Health Association did not share the same thought.

"Pepper am I such a bad employer you attempt death by starvation to get away from me?"

"I'm not starving!" She said surprised, a small smile playing on her lips. "I happen to be on a diet." He stared at her, eyes questioning. "I gained five pounds last month."

A long silence followed in which Tony leaned to his left and actually looked at her sitting form head to toe and then back up.

"Where?"

Pepper ignored him (and his meal) and dug into her salad, annoyed. Tony himself smirked. Now this could be fun. HIs own lunch was a huge double meat, double cheese hamburger, and a mounting of fried, the tall shake beside it just finished the picture quite nicely. Just to annoy her further he splattered ketchup all over the fried and ate with his hands. The burger was huge, and he cut it in half not because he couldn't deal with it, but his calculations were usually right and she would be falling into his trick soon. Tony could offer a bite, of many things, and she wanted to take a bite of the burger the way she stole glances and all. That just made him smile evilly.

"Hm, I tell you Pep." He picked up a French fry and pointed her way. "This burger is just...Mmm." And he took another bite, as she stared he ate. He was having a ball torturing her.

"That pre-heated meat and fries will kill you." She spat at him, angry.

"Did you heard when I order, girl? I said fresh, they just killed the cow to make this burger."

"And just how much less would your heart attack hurt?"

"I can have it right now. I guarantee you'll loose those five pound on worry alone." And he took another messy bite, humming at how delicious the meal was. And he wasn't faking it, it was the best burger since his first cheeseburger from his return. "I love building heart attacks; all these flavors, hmm!" He moaned in delight and bit again. "How's your salad, Pep?"

Before he could react to torture her further, Pepper reached forth and grabbed his other half of the burger, biting furiously on it. "Hey, hey, hey, that's my lunch!" He whined trying to stop her assault on his meal while they both pushed the salad away.

"Your fault for tempting me!" A waitress passed by and Pepper stopped her, ordering the biggest chocolate shake in the house. At this Tony just stared at her, a smile still present on his lips. Moments later they were too busy actually fighting over the pile of fries and when his meal was done with and the shake was halfway through they turned to the salad.

"What do we do with that?" He asked, and watch her bit her lower lip.

"Ignore it and let's buy some dessert."

Smiling smugly Tony leaned back and sighs.

Once again Stark makes dust of diet.