Enterprise, 2258

Sophie-Anne didn't make it to the transporter room before colliding head on with Spock in the hallway. The look on his face would have passed for normal to a casual observer, but she wasn't fooled. There was a thin layer of calm covering his panic, that she could tell was mere moments from bubbling up.

"What's the matter?" she asked, allowing him to hook his hand around her elbow and tug her away from the bridge.

"Cadet Kirk has managed to reactivate our transporter abilities," he explained, dodging two people running in the opposite direction. The ship had dissolved into controlled chaos, but Spock seemed to take no notice.

"That's good, but where are you going?"

He stopped pulling her along then, having reached the transporter room, and paused for a moment. The agitation she'd suspected lurked under the surface of his expression hit her full on when he wrapped his fingers around her bare wrist. It was a gesture he'd done a thousand times, so quick most people would miss it entirely, but in that moment their mental connection opened up and she could... feel him. He was frightened, for his parents and his planet, and frightened that he couldn't control the fear before it consumed him. And he was torn, though that part was hazier, and it seemed like he had something else to tell her but refused.

"I must attempt to save the elders, the planet is collapsing," he said, pulling his hand back. Nothing he'd ever done had ever felt so... intimate before, and though she wished she could control it Sophie-Anne could feel the color rising in her cheeks. Trying to play it off she offered what she hoped was an encouraging smile.

"Be careful, okay?"

He was already halfway into the room, rushing up onto the transporter pad. Kirk and Sulu were still slumped on the floor, a triumphant Chekov cheering over by the controls. Spock waved them away, kneeling down in position. "Step aside, I'm going to the surface."

"The surface of what? You're going down there? Are you nuts?!" Kirk said, allowing Sophie-Anne to slip an arm under his shoulder.

"JT, you reek," she said, giving him an appraising sniff as she helped him down the steps. He did stink, like ozone and phaser burns, and she quickly deposited him into a chair as Spock shot them a quick, final look.

"Energize," he commanded, and with the push of Chekov's button he disappeared, Kirk watched him go, turning up to face Sophie-Anne.

"He didn't really just go down there, right?" he asked, sharing a look with Sulu and Chekov. Sulu was already shrugging off his space suit, and Chekov seemed to want to avoid the conversation altogether, pressing at buttons that surely didn't need his attention. "With Pike gone, he's the Captain. He can't just take off like that!"

Sophie-Anne ignored him as well, pulling out a well concealed PADD and tracking Spock's process across the planet. It was a special feature she's been playing with, connecting directly to the ship's mainframe without special security clearance, and she hoped that Chekov wasn't paying much attention as she zoomed in on Spock's position. The Russian teen would either want to know exactly how it worked, or unintentionally rat her out. Either way there wasn't time. "They're his parents, he has to go. You understand that, I know you do," she whispered to Kirk, using her fingers to zoom in the map. "He's made it inside the Katric Ark, but the signal's breaking up really badly. I don't think there's much time..."

It seemed like only moments later that the Vulcan elders were materializing on the transporter pad, Chekov screaming and pounding frantically at the controls. Spock appeared last, his arm still outstretched toward where his mother should be standing, and Sophie-Anne had to choke back the sob of horror that threatened to escape. Even though they weren't touching, she could still feel his emotions. It was surreal, the way she knew that they were his, just from the feel and taste of them. It was heartbreak, so raw and wild that her knees started to give out. Kirk wrapped and arm around her waist without thinking, holding her up without comment or judgement, and they all watched as Spock left without a word to anyone.

XXX

An hour later, after getting checked out by a strangely quiet Doctor McCoy, Spock found himself sitting on the bridge. Too many thoughts swirled through his head at once, making it impossible to concentrate, and without realizing what he was doing he stood and headed for the turbolift. A moment too late he realized Uhura had followed him.

The look in her eyes, it nearly ended him. There was so much pity, concern and sorrow, that it hurt to look at her. When she reached over and stopped the lift he thought he might scream. After a moment she reached out and gently took his face in her hands. That contact, the skin to skin, it was like a full on assault. When she kissed him he could feel it all at once, emotions like the too tall ocean waves he'd seen back on Earth. She was so... sorry for him, so confused and hurt that it was impossible to tell where her sorrow ended and his own began.

"I'm so sorry," she murmured, running her hands along his hair. She really was beautiful, he realized. Smart, sexy, all the thing he never realized he prized in a woman. And it was clear beyond all doubt that she cared for him, he could feel it running like a current under the surface of her pain. Loving her was the logical choice, he knew, if love were logical. Her eyes drilled into his, voice soft. "What can I do? Tell me what you need."

Maybe it was her choice of words, but in that moment the only thing that flashed in his thoughts were a pair of dark green eyes and a wispy braid. Sophie-Anne his subconscious whispered, the image of her burning bright in his mind. When he didn't say anything Uhura frowned, mistaking his inattention for sorrow. Before he could stop himself he reached out, starting the turbo going again.

"I need for everyone to continue performing admirably," he said finally, unable to come up with anything better to say. She nodded, ever understanding, which only increased his guilt. When he was clear of the lift he stopped at a nearby console.

WHERE ARE YOU? he typed out.

A few moments later he received his response. DECK FOUR OBSERVATION.

He quickly walked down the hall, punching his code into the door and walking through onto the observation deck. Sophie-Anne was sitting on one of the benches, and the room was empty. Everyone else was racing around, making repairs, leaving the room deserted but for the two of them. When he came in she turned, a serious, unreadable expression on her face. He didn't have to say a word, just took a seat by her side.

At first he thought she might say something, offer condolences or ask questions, but when she simply slipped her hand into his it became clear that she understood how precious silence was to him just then. Touching Uhura had been like a flood, but Sophie-Anne's emotions were more like a tide. They still came to him, unrelenting sadness and quiet sorrow, but he didn't feel so much like he was drowning. Instead they floated together, shared anguish making his fingers curl tightly around hers.

It was a full five minutes later when he finally spoke, eyes trained firmly on the stars streaming past the observation window. "I never told her," he said, finally daring to turn his head toward hers. "I expressed the sentiment but never said the words to her. Now she is beyond my reach."

Sophie-Anne tugged him closer, pressing her shoulder against his and leaning her head toward him. "I'm sure she knew, Spock. You're not nearly as mysterious as you'd like to think," she said, and her words washed over him. He took comfort in them for a split second before the door opened again.

"Captain, you asked me to keep you updated on the condition of the Vulcan High Council, but our communicators are still down on this deck and..." It was Doctor McCoy, and he looked, as the humans were fond of saying, "totally pissed".

XXX

a/n: this update has been an inexcusably long time coming. i actually got distracted looking at pictures of karl urban. i wish this were not true, but it is...

i've really played up the whole vulcan telepathy thang, i'm not sure if the mechanics are right but i kind of imagine that when spock is all emotionally compromised he might get a little sloppy in his mental wanderings... plus i read somewhere that vulcans avoid skin contact because of the telepathic implications. oh! and in canon, i really love spock and uhura... i just need for things to play out a little differently in this one.