A/N: I am sick, again =.= my body just hates me. Anyways, chapter five is here. This chapter made me cry while writing it. It's hard writing scenes that relate to you in some shape or form. I won't get into the story about why (too long of a story), but this just moves me. At least, the beginning does... I don't know about everyone else tho :/

Chapter Five

It was taking everything in Len to keep control of his emotions. Now that he was away from the situation, he felt completely embarrassed; he had no idea how he was going to face the class now. Right now, they were probably bitching about how much of an arsehole he was to their "precious" Shion-senpai, but he didn't care. He honestly thought Shion-senpai was better than that. Seriously had, but clearly he was wrong. He should have known better. Every person in this world were two-faces. They were all the same… we're all the same…

"Life would have been better if you were never born!" was something his mother said frequently… all because he wasn't normal. Just because he wasn't like every other guy… I hate this. I hate myself. I hate everyone and everything. Mother was right, life would have been so much better if I just disappeared.

He'd never seriously thought about suicide before, but he began to wonder what would happen if he threw himself off the school building. Gakupo would take care of Rin that he was sure of. Rin would never really understand why her brother would never come home. And everyone else? His parents would laugh, because that was the kind of people they were. His classmates? Well, why would they care? They didn't care beforehand, why should they care now?

All it took was some strength to climb the fence and jump. That was all-

"KAITO!" a voice startled him out of his thoughts, and for a moment, he was unsure what had happened until a moment later when the door to the roof opened. Slowly turning, he could hear some yelling, but he realised someone had stepped out of the doorway and into the sunlight. Len just stared as Shion-senpai turned around, and flinched. Someone had clearly king-hit him from the bruise and blood dripping down the right side of his face. The bruise was so big it covered the whole cheek right from the bottom of his right eye down to his jaw. His lip was slightly cut, which was where the blood was dripping from.

It felt like forever they stood there, but then Len got the confidence to speak up. "Who… punched you?"

"Kamui-senpai," he answered flatly.

How the hell…? Len was kind of startled that Gakupo would do something like that. When Len had bolted out the door, Gakupo had been walking along the hall. He's ran straight into him, but had bolted before Gakupo got a word out of him. Clearly he followed Len this far. The only question was why Shion-senpai was here. "Why are you here?" Len snapped, once again feeling bruised. "Here to make more fun at me?" He felt the tears beginning to gush again. This is stupid.

"Do you not see my face?" Shion-senpai answered, and though Len was expecting it to bitter, it wasn't. Len looked up again, staring at him. "How do you think this happened?"

"You said Kamui-senpai punched you," Len whispered.

"But why do you think he did that?"

"I… don't know…" Len whispered.

"He did that because I said he could," Shion-senpai replied. The answer shocked Len, making him stared wide-eyed at him. He was about to ask why, but clearly Shion-senpai guessed the next word and continued on if Len had asked. "I told him he could, because I felt I deserved it. Of course, you can hear the yelling downstairs. Aiko, Hibiki and Katsurou are having a bitch fest at him while I'm here." He took a step forward, his expression changing to an apologetic look. "Len, I'm sorry. You're right, we were the ones placing labels on you when we shouldn't have. However, I do stand by what I said. If you don't tell us what's wrong, how are we meant to know? We're not mind readers, Len. We're human too," Shion-senpai said softly. "And we aren't as perfect as you make us out to be. Remember, I had cancer for two years. I was constantly reminded that I was going to die. Not just by the doctors, but my own parents had made up their mind and just assumed I was going to drop dead. They still do."

He should have remember that. They had been talking about it yesterday. Now Len just felt guilty. "I…"

"It's hard, Len. When you're stuck between a rock and a hard place, it's really hard to find your footing again. Ryunnosuke told us that your parents were abusive. You might not remember him, but he went to Junior High with you. He's also the only person who knew what was going on, I guess. He really shook us all up. After you bolted from the room, everyone was angry at you. They shouldn't have been angry with you, they should have been angry at me. I said stupid things without knowing the truth. I took the labels everyone else planted on you, used them to humiliate you. They shouldn't have been angry with anyone but me. But they weren't. They were so damn angry that it pissed Ryunnosuke off. He's not a guy to get involved in things, but he shut the whole damn class and shook some sense into them. After we left, the whole class broke up to look for you." Shion-senpai sighed. "We're all the same Len. We all try to be perfect, but what do you know about your class mates? Would you have known Chiyoko's parents committed suicide two months from each other?"

Len shook his head. No he hadn't heard that.

"It was about four months ago now. Chiyoko lives with her uncle now. Hibiki doesn't have a father either. He dad was killed in a car accident. Aiko's mother miscarried five times, and her mother nearly died giving birth to her. Aiko was lucky to even be here, same with her mother. Ryunnosuke comes from a strained family. He doesn't get along with his father and lives with his mother's parent's." Shion-senpai watched Len, then moved forward. "Len, no one is perfect. We all go through hardships in our lives. Some of us never really move on from those hardships, while others do. That's just life." He stopped in front of Len, who had shrunk into himself. "I wouldn't know this if they never told me. Do you think it was easy? No, it wasn't easy. Aiko balled her eyes out for an hour after telling me her story. Chiyoko did too. Hibiki, who's bloody loud, went silent. He lost his voice half way through telling me his story. Ryunnosuke, who doesn't normally get angry, got really angry and punch a hole in the wall while telling me. That's just how it is; and reality is, when we bottle things up, small things make us explode."

Looking away, Len nodded.

Shion-senpai sighed then sat down on the ground. "Did you know Japan is up there on the top of the list when it comes to suicide? Did you know most of the suicides that happen in Japan are from the male demographic? Did you know that the most common form of suicide here is throwing yourself in front of the train? I catch the train to school often, Len. The amount of times the train has stopped because of an accident or something just reminds me that every day, people take their own lives. It reminds me that some people are so deeply depressed and aren't being helped. No one is helping these people, and now days, we almost seem to tolerate the fact that people are killing themselves," Shion-senpai's voice went quiet for a moment, then he looked Len in the eye. "I almost attempted suicide myself. I thought if I was going to die anyway, it wouldn't matter. The only reason I'm here was because I scared myself out of it. I didn't want to die. It's not easy to talk yourself out of taking your own life, Len. A lot of people don't. They just do it."

Len continued to stare, then looked away from him. "Did you assume I was…?"

"I didn't have to assume anything Len. I'm just telling you, that no matter how hard life is, it's not worth giving it up. You have a little sister, right?"

"…Yes…"

"How do you think she would have felt knowing her brother didn't come home tonight? She's only little right? How do you think things would have gone? Would your parents take her back?"

Len flinched, realising what he meant. That was right. The only reason he had Rin was because he was capable of taking care of her. If he were to die or something… Gakupo wouldn't be able to fight to keep her, she'd go back home and face the life he had… and end up doing the same thing he did years later. It was just enough to trigger a wave of emotions and tears. Shion-senpai was right…

"Len," Shion-senpai stood up and once he was on his feet, he pulled Len into a hug. "I am so sorry for what happened before. I stepped out of line and did something stupid that hurt your feelings. I just hope you can forgive me some day. If not today, then maybe someday in the future."

Could he forgive Shion-senpai? Since day one, Len had really come to like Shion-senpai. He just stood out, and became popular amongst the students in their class. Of course, outside of their class room, he was a nobody to the rest of the student body, but he didn't need that. He had people that depended on him… and who he could depend on. Len ended up mumbling something without much thought, but Shion-senpai clearly didn't hear him.

"Huh? What was that?"

"I…I don't own any bathers… so I don't have anything… for Saturday…"

For a moment, Shion-senpai was silent. And then, he laughed. "Well, why didn't you say something earlier, silly? If that was what you needed all along, you could have just asked me to help you find something."

"I wouldn't trust your fashion sense, Shion," a voice intruded. Len stepped away, wiped his eyes and looked as Shion-senpai's friends came up to the roof. "That last pair of bathers you brought had duckies on them."

"I didn't buy them! My grandmother did!" Shion-senpai protested, going bright red.

"Bullshit, you secretly think little duckies are cute," Aiko laughed loudly until she was practically crying.

"Damn it Aiko!" Shion-senpai yelled.

"Alright, alright," Aiko laughed. Sweeping past Shion-senpai, she came up behind Len, grinning brightly. "Anyway, Kaito. You have club this afternoon, while I don't. So, why don't I just take care of that matter since I have nothing on this afternoon? Besides, after today, I think you two need some space to cool off. There was a lot of tension, and there still is so let's leave it be for now, alright."

Somehow, Len felt Aiko was right. Everyone was on high alert, and if things did swell again, it would probably be between them. Shion-senpai must have clearly thought it through as well, sighed and gave up. Before Len even had a chance to explain he could do that on his own, it was settled and the next thing he knew, Aiko was dragging him back downstairs, alone. Gakupo was clearly nowhere to be seen, so Len promised himself that he'll talk to Gakupo tonight and explain what actually happened. He wouldn't lie that the punch bothered him, but Shion-senpai did deserve it, though not to that extent.

"I'm sorry." Len jumped, realising Aiko had spoken. "I should have intervened when Kaito mentioned about what happened when we had our names pulled out of the hat. I was going to say I'd partner up with you, but Kaito cut in before I had that chance. I told him not to say anything either, so I'm partly to blame for this."

"N-No… I needed to hear it," Len admitted. Maybe he'd been a little arrogant after all.

"No! What should have happened was the two-faced bitch should have kept her trap shut and done the work. She actually brought it up because she wanted to work with Kaito, and couldn't settle for the fact another girl was. Her words were 'Len is stupid and pathetic; he doesn't care about people. Why should I have to work with him when she gets to work is Shion-kun.' Those were her exact words, because all she wanted was Kaito. Funny thing was, Kaito said to me he'd rather eat shit than deal with her." Aiko laughed bitterly. "I hope she gets bitch slapped one day. In fact, I hope I'm the one to slap her."

Len stopped walking, which made Aiko nearly slip, though she didn't complain. "You're just saying that."

"That's the thing, though Len. I'm not. This was what really happened," Aiko replied. "I'm not making it up. Kaito ended up settling the dispute by saying he'd work with you and the two girls could work together. As far as Kaito was concerned, that was what he wanted. He's been trying to think of ways to integrate you into our class. He hates seeing you alone, and he's just worried. When he said he didn't believe you had friends, he genuinely meant that. He really did think you were alone, and he hated that. He hated the fact you were an outcast and wanted to change that."

"I know you're not good around people, but don't you find it boring having no friends?" That had been what he said. When Shion-senpai spoke those words, it was the final straw. He'd been so damn angry that he hadn't actually listened to how he said that. He didn't mean it nastily, little did he actually say it in a nasty way. He was being genuine about it, and if Len has just paid a little more attention, he would have seen the concern. No, he had seen the concern. He'd mistaken it for pity. That was why it hurt so much.

"Len… what are you scared of?"

The question startled Len, and he found that Aiko had come up real close, and was now speaking quietly. It was almost as if she knew there was some big, dark secret Len was hiding. Of course, he wasn't going to tell her his reasons. He barely knew her! Instead, he looked away.

"Are you scared of being rejected?"

Again, that startled him. How did she…? "I guess… I guess it is."

Her eyes saddened. "Ryu said your parents were abusive… are they the reason behind it?"

"…I guess…"

Then, she frowned. "Len…" they were silent. What more was there to say? Sighing, Aiko stepped away. "I'm being nosy, and I'm sorry. However, you shouldn't need to be scared to tell us what's up." She offered him a small smile. "We'll listen if you need us."

A/N: I am team Aiko xD Aiko plays a HUGE part in the next few chapters, and she (and Hibiki later) are the more seen, more heard of the two as they are considered Kaito-san's best friends. I hope Aiko doesn't seem weird, or outrageous abnormal in personality or anything either, because she's going to be the first ice breaker in the group (and you'll see why in the next few chapters). Later on, she'll be refered to as Aiko-san, I just left it as Aiko for this one (too lazy to change it really haha)

Ryu's story changed in later chapters. Originally he was going to be adopted, but I changed my mind about that and changed it to that he has a rough relationship with his father. You'll see later on why I changed it (about chapter eight or so it is explained what Ryu's family situation is).