"Calm down." Jackson tried to soothe his boyfriend, who was sat on the edge of his seat, raging. He knew from experience that if he didn't calm Aaron down quick, he would soon spiral out of control.
"Yeah mate, Jackson's right." Aaron said handing him his crutches. "You need to calm down."
Aaron breathed deeply through his nose. He knew he was losing it again and he needed to calm down before he was kicked out. He just couldn't help himself, not with everybody talking at him. "I need a cig." He breathed getting up and heading off before they could stop him.
Jackson wasn't going to let him wonder off on his own tonight, in town. Especially after the events that had just taken place. Waiting a few minutes, to give Aaron a head started, Jackson left Adam and the girls in the Bar as he went to follow the teen. Outside, he found Aaron slumped against a wall round the corner, trying to light a cigarette with his hands shaking from anger. He hated Aaron smoking but he also hated to see him struggling. He took the cigarette and lighter from Aaron without a word, once lit he handed the cigarette back and shook the lighter off.
Aaron glared at Jackson for a while before taking the cigarette back. He took a long drag, turning his head to blow the smoke out of his lungs away from Jackson.
"I could of done it myself." Aaron muttered as he rubbed the same hand he held the cigarette in over his head.
"I know you could of." Jackson said quietly. "I never said you couldn't."
A few minutes passed Aaron continued to take drags from his cigarette trying to soothe his temper.
"What happened in there?" Jackson asked breaking the silence that had come between them.
Aaron let out a shaky breath and shrugged his shoulders. He didn't know. One minute the guy was apologizing for knocking in to him the next minute all hell had broken lose. It didn't take much to get him riled up. It never did.
"Don't give me that." Jackson sighed, standing in front of Aaron who still had his back against the wall.
Aaron pulled out another cigarette, he never chain smoked. The odd one on occasion, when he really felt the need to have one, but never one straight after another. But lately he'd found himself smoking more and more.
"No Aaron." Jackson breathed, taking the cigarette from his hand. He was drawing the line at one.
Aaron glared at him, but he didn't care. "Just talk to me Aaron!" Jackson demanded. "I know I keep saying it but, talk to me!"
"What's there to talk about?" Aaron shrugged. He didn't want to open up to him in the middle of the street.
Jackson rolled on his eyes and paced up and down. "I really don't understand you sometimes."
"You're not the only one." Aaron mumbled under his breath.
"What was that?" Jackson snapped only just hearing what he said only to receive another shrug from the teen. He was beginning to frustrate him again. It was like talking to a brick wall. He couldn't get anything out of him. "We're going home." Jackson told him, heading off down the street.
"What?"
"We're going home."
"Yeah, I heard you right, why?"
"Just do as you're told." Jackson shot over his shoulder as he chucked the cigarette on the floor.
"What about Adam?" Aaron called after him, already trying his best to catch up with Jackson's strides.
"We'll text him on the way home. He'll be fine with Scarlett and Holly." Jackson huffed.
He knew he was in serious trouble now. Jackson had ordered him to get in the taxi when he waved it down and the whole journey home was in complete silence, filled by the sounds of Jackson breathing deeply. He was annoyed, anyone could tell. They got out at Smithy Cottage and Aaron headed inside when Jackson instructed him to as he paid the driver. It was gone twelve when they got back so nobody was awake to bump into when they got in. The whole place was in darkness as they could hear Paddy and Hazel snoring away upstairs.
"Upstairs." Jackson said when he got in.
Aaron did as he was told, climbing the stairs with Jackson behind him.
"Jackson-." Aaron started. He didn't know what he was going to say, but he needed to test the waters. Jackson didn't seem too pleased at all.
"No, Aaron. I'm gonna talk and you're gonna listen, for now." Jackson told him as he pulled of his jacket. "Then you're gonna talk and I mean it Aaron." He added before he started. "I don't know what's going on in that head of yours Aaron, I really don't. But I want to, I want that more than anything. Why can't you get that? Whenever I try to get you to talk you just close down on me. And you need talk! Otherwise stuff happens, like tonight. You just lose it."
"I'm sorry-." Aaron tried.
"No. Don't." Jackson stopped him. "You're going to end up hurting some one or worse . . . yourself. But you can't see that and that's what frightens me Aaron. So I need to know what's going on in your head, what you're thinking, how you feel. I need to know, so maybe I can help. 'Cause otherwise I can't. Do you understand?"
Aaron nodded his head. He did understand. But it wasn't as easy as that. He couldn't break a life time habit and open up to him. It was gonna take time.
"So what was going on in your head when you went for that lad?" Jackson asked as he sat down next to him on the edge of the bed.
Aaron shrugged his shoulders before he could stop himself. "I don't know." Aaron quickly said before Jackson thought he wasn't trying. He really was.
"You can do better than that." Jackson pushed.
". . . I just. . . I was just- angry." Aaron sighed looking towards the floor.
It was a start. "Do you know why?" Jackson asked gently, putting a hand on Aaron's back comfortingly.
Again, Aaron shrugged. "I guess- with everything that's been going on. . ." Aaron sighed leaving the sentence hanging. Jackson knew more than anybody what he was going through.
"Next time, when things ever feel like they're getting too much, talk to me. Before you go off on one again." Jackson told him sensing he wasn't going to get any more out of him that night.
Aaron nodded his head in understanding. "Bed?"
"Bed." Jackson agreed rubbing Aaron's back before getting up to change. They were both exhausted.
Later on, when both were laying in bed Jackson felt Aaron twist his upper body towards him and snake an arm around his waist. The younger man nestled his face in the crook of Jackson's neck, making him shiver as he felt his breath against his skin. He didn't say a word, waiting to see what else Aaron was going to do. It was extremely rare to find Aaron acting out affectionately, especially since Darrel. Before there would be the odd, kiss or hug from him, leaving the teen ducking his head in embarrassment afterwards. But since Darrel the teen had done no such thing. It had been up to Jackson to test the water.
"I'm sorry for acting like such a pratt." Aaron whispered sleepily.
Jackson kept quite, he wasn't sure if Aaron thought he was asleep and he didn't want Aaron to freeze.
"I should talk more. . ." Aaron sighed.
A couple of minutes silence passed before Jackson assumed Aaron had fallen asleep. After all it was gone one in the morning. The teen would be exhausted the next day. He'd been traipsing round town with Scarlett, Adam and Holly all night.
". . . I just felt- I don't know. I couldn't breathe, they were crowding round me." Aaron justified sleepily. Jackson knew the teen wouldn't remember what he said, he could tell by his bitty sentences that he was dangerously close to falling asleep. Aaron would never of said this much if he was wide awake, aware out of what he was saying. ". . . And then. . . then I couldn't- I just. . . I lost it. I could-" Aaron yawned sleep finally beginning to win.
"Aaron?" Jackson whispered in the dark when the teen didn't continue his sentence. "Aaron?"
Gently, Jackson lifted Aaron's arm from around his waist and rolled over to face him. The teen had fallen asleep mid sentence. He guided Aaron's arm back around his waist, before slipping his own around the younger man's and settling down to sleep.
The next day, just as Jackson had expected, Aaron slept most of the time. The teen surfaced after lunch and made it downstairs before falling asleep again on the sofa in the living room with Jackson. He was still on a strict schedule of pain killers that made him more tired than usual and the night out had taken it out of him as well.
"We've got the solicitors tomorrow morning." Jackson reminded Aaron when he finally woke up again. He'd spent the past couple of hours watching Aaron sleep as he rested his head in his lap.
"Do we have to go?" Aaron groaned as he sat up and stretched.
"Yes." Jackson laughed as Aaron pulled faces as he stretched. The teen had woken up complaining of neck ache earlier, he'd slept on it funny the night before.
"Can't he just . . ." Aaron sighed waving a hand in the air. He didn't know what he could 'just do' he didn't want to go.
"We have to. End of." Jackson said, twisting his body round to face him. "Come here." He told him pulling Aaron back towards him. He began to massage the base of Aaron's neck. He was incredibly tense, Jackson's finger's and palms working to ease out the tight knots in Aaron's shoulders.
"Ah!" Aaron cried out when Jackson pushed his palm too hard.
"Shut up you girl." Jackson teased. "It'll help."
"Ah! It hurts- ah! What you playing at!" Aaron cried out again trying to wriggle free.
Jackson pulled him closer. "Relax." He whispered in Aaron's ear. "Trust me."
So Aaron did. He began to relax into his touch, trying not to cry out at first as each hard rub would send shooting pains along his shoulders or up his neck. Eventually, the pain subsided and Aaron found himself drifting off back to sleep again, content with the gentle massage from the older man. "See?" Jackson whispered to Aaron when he felt the teen was relaxed.
"Mmm." Aaron mumbled absentmindedly.
"Not disturbing anything am I?" Hazel announced as she walked into the room.
"No, just giving Aaron here a massage." Jackson told her as he continued to manipulate Aaron's muscles.
"Oh, that reminds me of this guy I met in Jamaica. He had godly hands, he did." Hazel sighed as shivers went up her spine. "Though his hands did tend to won-."
"Mum!" Jackson cried out stopping her before she could paint images of the two young men.
"What?" Hazel protested taking a seat on the other sofa.
"Don't." Jackson warned her, now put off giving Aaron a massage. "We don't want to know."
"Fine." She huffed. "It was all innocent. . ."
"Still. We'd rather not know." Jackson said quickly.
"No need to stop on my account." Hazel told him noticing the two men had stopped.
"We weren't." Jackson sighed. "Aaron's due for another medication top up."
"No I'm no-." Aaron started a little puzzled. He'd had some a few hours ago.
"Yes you are." Jackson told him heading to the kitchen. "You've been asleep for hours don't forget."
A/N – I'm glad you didn't think I was cruel for stopping the update so quickly the other night. I was out of time and I really wanted to update. Thank you for the kind reviews, I appreciate every single piece of feedback I receive. It helps me no end. So close to forty chapters Longest fic I've written so far! Anyway, hope you enjoyed.