SIMON
I text him after I leave the car. And when I'm on the bus. And when I get home. I write how sorry I am, each message longer than the last. He reads them, but doesn't reply. I write that I'll never speak to him again if he doesn't respond. No reply. I tell him I was joking. I give up on texting and start calling, he finally picks up on the ninth one, "Baz?"
"What?" His voice is curt and agitated.
"I'm really sorry," I try to reason. Honestly, I don't know why he could possibly be this angry.
"For what? You didn't do anything," He sighs.
"For, uh, being a twat?" I shake my head, even though he can't see, "Are you sure you can't meet up?"
"Snow you-" He stops, "Tonight?"
"Umm. Sure. Whenever," i mentally smack myself. I never say anything charming.
"In a few hours? At the park near school?"
"It's almost midnight, Baz."
"I know," He sighs again, "If you can't-"
"I can, of course I can," I cut him off.
"Alright, well see you then," He hangs before I can respond.
I see him sitting on the bonnet of his car when I arrive. He stares at me when I see down beside him, "You walked?"
"Well, yeah, the buses don't run this late," And I obviously I wouldn't borrow my dad's car.
"I could've picked you up," He shrugs and looks down at the asphalt. I knock my leg against his, waiting for him to say something else, he doesn't.
"So, um, are we still fighting?" I ask him and stare at his face. Taking in the moonlight that cast shadows on his high cheekbones making him look like a vampire.
"I don't know," He finally glances up at me, but doesn't look me in the eye, "We weren't really fighting about anything important anyway," I smile and take his hand. He squeezes mine back.
"You said we weren't, well," I gulp, trying to build up nerve, "You said we weren't dating. Do you, uh, want to?" He immediately retracts his hand from mine, but then, with a guilty look on his face, takes it back.
"It's just difficult, Simon," He meets my gaze, he's eyes are glinting, "You don't understand," I'm the one to pull my hand away now.
"Then make me," I say, trying not too sound as angry as I am. His bottom lip quivers, I can tell I'm making this worse than it has to be.
"I can't, okay? Just leave it alone. Can't we just keep things this way, Simon? Just the way they are," He places a hand on my shoulder and rubs his thumb in circles on my coat.
"We can't just tumble around and be in hiding forever," I try to shrug off his hand, but he doesn't let me. He leans in until our lips are almost touching.
"Why not?" I can feel his warm breath on my face, it smells of smoke. I decide yelling about that now wouldn't be appropriate.
"Because that-" He cuts me off by kissing me. I push him off, surprising both of us, "That doesn't work for me. I- I don't want that."
"Is this- are you giving me an ultimatum?" I'm not entirely sure what that means, but I nod anyway, "Simon, I can't just do what you want. You can't just threaten not to be with me when you want something."
"Really!" I shake my head at him. He's so freaking thick sometimes, "You're the one saying we aren't together."
"You're the one trying to out me," His posture is straight and his chin is forced up, but I catch his voice wavering.
"What's the worst that could happen?" I mean it sincerely and he bites his lip before speaking.
"There are things, with my family and such. It's difficult. Like I said."
"What things, Baz? Can't you talk to me?" I throw my hands in the air. He looks at me with a frown on his face.
"No," He gets up and walks to the driver's side of the car. He pauses before he gets in, "I'll give you a ride home," I roll my eyes and hop into the car.
"Is this really it? Are you just going to never speak to me again?" I almost laugh. This all seems so dramatic.
"That's the plan," He replies sarcastically. We ride the rest of the way in silence, when he stops at my house I don't get out.
"You're being an idiot," I say.
"I'm not an idiot."
"I know; that's why this is so surprising," I smirk at him, proud of that line.
"Get out of my car," I comply and he races away without saying a word.