Author's Note: Another Chapter! Hope anyone and everyone reading this enjoys what they read. As always, Read/Enjoy/Review! I know this chapters a little on the heavy side, as far as sadness, but it will get better. I promise.

Chapter Sixteen: Knits and Purls

" What do you say when someone's dream dies? When it's torn away from them before they even realize it was so close to becoming a reality? There isn't much you can really say to them, other than just keep breathing; and never stop dreaming."-Anonymous.

XXXX

" He called you what! I swear to all that is holy when I get my hands on Chase, I'm going to rip his pretty little head off his shoulders," Evangeline screams through the phone, and I wince as I pace in the cool Florida air.

I don't respond. Ask her to keep quiet, to not say anything, because in all honesty I know it wont do any good for one. And secondly, I feel like crap. Spasming cramps, of all times for the monthly demon to show its face, it has to be now. I double over just slightly as I try to breath through the piercing pain.

" Hey, Brae, you okay?"

" Yeah, I'm fine," I say kind of breathlessly, " Listen, I'll text you. I need to get back in there. You guys still coming down?"

" Yeah, we'll be there tomorrow morning with your things. Hey, Brae."

" Hmm."

" I'm proud of you. A lesser person would have told Ty to go kick rocks, but not you. Love you."

" Love you more. Bye."

I hang up the phone, and go back into the hospital, all the while putting my own pain out of mind as I go.

XXXX

I sit among the faces. Barely noticing any of them as time passes slowly. Second by second, minute by minute. Waiting. I feel it. Continuously. The same shooting pain that radiates through my abdomen, but I ignore it, pushing it out of my mind as another cup of stale coffee is pressed into my hands.

" You look exhausted," Nick says as he sits next to me, his eyes searching mine and I cringe setting the cup aside.

" I'm fine," I manage to say, trying to smile, but it comes out as a grimace, and I know it by the flickering of curiosity in his hazel eyes.

" Are you sure? Brae, your really pale," he says but I shake my head, moving away from his outstretched hands.

" I told you, I'm fine," I nearly snap, but I manage to contain it as Tyson's surgeon enters the room, glad when all the attention is off of me.

" The surgery went well," the grizzled man says, and I let out a breath I hadn't realized I was holding.

" Oh thank God," I say, and soon everyone's hugging, and I'm being passed around, enveloped in tight embraces. As Mike pulls me in for a hug, I let out a strangled cry, slumping when he sets me down. I feel it then, the undeniable wet feeling dripping below my knee's, and hunched over, with utter silence surrounding me, I lift shaking fingers in front of me, confused by the smear of red.

" Brae," Tyson's mother is the only person I can hear, and her hand lays softly on my shoulder.

" Something's wrong," I murmur, lifting my eyes to hers and she looks at me sadly nodding her head, and with a rush of words I don't hear the room clears out, leaving just us.

XXXX

" Is there anyone you want me to call?" Tracy asks light, and my fingers instantly clamp down on hers, squeezing as the tears keep streaming down my face.

" No. No," I whisper, shaking my head from my hospital bed, " You don't have to stay, you should go, be with Ty. Please, please don't tell him."

" My baby is just fine, he's got all the boys, and Bailey to keep him company," she says handing me a tissue, " Are you sure you don't want me to call someone. Chase maybe?"

" No! No, you can't call him," I say panicking slightly and she just nods her head, eyes softening.

" Okay. All right, I wont call him. I'll just sit here with you for a while if you don't mind." I smile shakily turning my head to the side to stare out of the window.

" He didn't want children," I murmur finally breaking the silence, but I don't even recognize my voice. I sound hollow. Far away, like I'm not in my own body as the words are spoken, "Chase, he uh, he never wanted kids. Of course he changed his mind, but I don't think he actually wants it. I think he was going along with it for me. How is this possible? How can I feel so lost over something I didn't even know was happening inside of me?"

" It's normal. You may not have known it, but it doesn't lessen the sting. It was your baby."

" They said I was only about nine weeks. I keep wondering, how did I not know? I've always been regular, so how could I not recognize that I was late by a little over two months, I mean, I'm on birth control, so it should be like clockwork. Then I remember, so much has been going on. Two months ago was Evy's wedding, and I was so busy. Then I got sick. Bronchitis, so I was on antibiotics. So of course that would explain how I ended up pregnant in the first place. It just. It doesn't make sense. It was there, and then all of a sudden its gone. I just, I don't, I don't."

" Brae? What the hell happened? Why are you in a hospital bed? Mom?" Tyson's voice breaks through my ragged sobs, and I stare at him mortified.

" I'm sorry, I tried telling him, we thought he was sleeping," Nick says from behind him, and I roll over, closing my eyes tightly.

This is all a dream.

Please dear God let this all be a bad dream.

XXXX

I wake crying. My heart thundering, and aside from the fact that my face is wet and chest aches the only other feeling I have is the warmth of someone's hand covering mine. I blink my eyes clear, finding a familiar head of hair next to me.

Tyson, sound asleep, his long fingers over mine, hiding the skin on the back of my hand that's bruised from the I.v taped there.

" Ty," I whisper, fingers twitching under his.

" Hmm, morning," Tyson's sleep filled voice fills the room, and I try to smile, but I can't, " How, how are you?"

" Peachy," I croak out, and he winces slightly, and still his hand doesn't leave mine.

" Shit Brae, you don't have to stay. You should go home, be with Evy," he says and I shake my head furiously at him, suddenly feeling full of panic.

" What, why? Is Nick magically going to want change your PICC line dressing, and push the meds?" I ask, tears filling my eyes.

" Hell no, but you're, you just, you lost a…a baby," he stammers and I roll my eyes.

" Look, I just, I want to forget all about this okay? I am going to pretend none of this happened, and in order for that to happen then things need to go exactly how I planned. I didn't fight with my husband, I wasn't called a whore, for nothing."

" He called you a whore, fucking bastard," he says angrily and I laugh, actually manage to let the rolling sound ripple through my lips.

" Does it matter?" I ask, shaking my head, " I don't really care what he thinks, or what anyone thinks. I told you I'd help you through this, so, I'm helping you through this."

Truth is though, I need to be helped through my predicament just as much as Tyson needs help through his.

XXXX

How Nick, Mike, and Chris managed to convince Evy and Jared that I was out and that they should just be on their way I'll never know, what I do know is I'm grateful. Grateful that I wouldn't have to see them.

Not yet.

Not like this.

I button my shorts, staring at my bare stomach in the mirror, fingers running over my smooth skin. Skin that, had things gone the way it was supposed to go, would have been stretched tight over my child. Even as the tears cloud my eyes I stop the thoughts, throwing up mental roadblocks.

I have to focus on Tyson now.

Getting Tyson better, and then getting me better.

That's what I have to do.

" Hey Brae, you ready?" Nick's voice comes from the other side of the curtain and I tug my baby pink tank top into place, picking up my duffel bag.

" Yeah, I'm ready," I say, turning to send one final glance at the room where I lost my dreams.

XXXX

" Tyson Jay Ritter, you better not be going anywhere near that swimming pool," I call through the open kitchen door that leads to a beautiful, and huge back yard.

" Ugh come on!" Tyson yells back and I roll my eyes.

" Fine, but when you get another infection and end up losing your arm don't say I didn't warn you!" I sing out nonchalantly, satisfied as he comes back into the house, a pout on his lips as he glares at me.

" This isn't fair. This is just," he growls, " Unfair. I can't do anything."

" Your such a baby, and yes you can. Write music, watch movies, hell get a new hobby," I say, putting his antibiotics in the refrigerator, smiling over my shoulder at him.

" Like what?" he snaps, but I don't take his pissy mood personally. I'd be crawling the walls too if I was trapped with very limited things to entertain myself with.

" Hmm. Painting. Sketching. Oh, I know knitting!" I cry happily and Tyson's eyes grow wide as he stares at me.

" Knitting?"

" Yes, knitting. Its fun, and relaxing, you'd be surprised."

" There's no way I'm taking up knitting."

" Yes you are."

" No. I'm not."

" You are."

" Am not."

" Are."

" Not."

" Are."

" Not."

" Are."

" Not."

" Are. And do you want to know why you are Tyson?" I ask sweetly as I smile at him.

" Oh, please do tell me why Braelyn."

" Because. I. Said. So."

XXXX

I smile, smugly, as I watch Tyson, his face screwed up in concentration as his knitting needles click together. But I smile so smugly because it means I won. That's right. I won. I got Tyson to knit, and he's actually enjoying himself.

I am a genius.

" So, what are you making?" I ask, as I sit next to him.

" Scarf." And I'm highly amused by his quick, one word answer.

" A scarf?"

" Yes, a scarf. You know those things that wrap around your neck to keep you warm when it's cold outside."

" Really, is that what there for, and here I was thinking they were just some sort of fancy neck decoration," I say dumbly finding some satisfaction when he laughs lightly.

" Shit, your distracting me. You made me drop the stitch," he proclaims, and I break into uncontrollable laughter.

" I'm so sorry, but you need to set the needles down for know, its time for your meds," I say checking my watch to make sure I'm on time.

" Come on, just let me finish this row," he pleads and I roll my eyes as I reach towards his hands.

" Tyson, don't fight me on this," I say, glaring when he pulls the needles and yarn out of reach.

" I'm almost finished!"

" Tyson, seriously, put down the old lady hobby for two seconds so I can give you your meds."

" No! I hate that shit, makes me feel like crap," he pouts his fingers working furiously on his knits and purls.

" Tyson, don't start with me. The doctor explained full well to you that there would be side effects," I say, gritting my teeth.

" Okay, fine, fine, Jesus, I just wanted to finish the row," he grumbles darkly, setting his newfound hobby aside, staring at me, " Go get the nastiness."

" You are such a baby," I mumble as I walk out of the room.

Twenty minutes later, and I stand by my claim of Tyson and his baby like attitude. I stare at him, hands in latex gloves, alcohol swab in one hand, antibiotic filled needle in the other.

" Tyson Jay Ritter, do not make me call your mother," I say through clenched teeth.

" You wouldn't," he spits and I raise an eyebrow, smirking.

" Oh, but I will. She was nice enough to give me both her home, and cell phone number, so was Bailey," I say, and he squirms. Yes, squirms as he sits on the couch, arms crossed defiantly over his chest.

" You. Suck."

" Whatever. God, such a baby," I say sitting in front of him. I set to work, cleaning the line before administering the antibiotic. I wince, just a little when he shivers, and sigh when I flush the line and goose bumps are all ready spreading on his skin, " You should lay down now."

" Brae," he calls out to me, and I turn back to him, watching as he curls onto his side on the couch.

" Hmm."

" Thank you."