A/N: Please read the lyrics if you would be so kind.

Disclaimer: I don't own the Outsiders. I don't own Brother, by Alice in Chains.

Roses in a vase of white. Bloodied by the thorns beside the leaves that fall because my hand is pulling them hard as I can. You were always so far away. I know that pain and I won't run away like I used to do.

No one said a word. The rain was the only noise any of us heard, and frankly, the majority of the room liked it that way.

Dally threw stick after stick into the dying fire we tried to keep. The cold of the night was starting be affective and there was nothing but hay and mud in the barn. We needed this, even if we burned.

Ronnie picked at the mud in-between the cracks of the flooring with a stick. His face hung low and his body was slumped. He didn't look like himself...the self that I knew anyway.

The car wouldn't work. Ronnie bitched and ranted and spewed and it still didn't move. Dally says it's the radiator. Ronnie disagrees. The only thing the rest of us know: we aren't getting out of here anytime soon...and the rain is back and it's dark.

"Can you keep a fire going in some place like this?" Emily asked.

Pony had his knees up to his chest, just watching the fire. "As long as there's an opening and you watch it, it's fine."

Ronnie and Emily hadn't been here long. We noticed that when we came in. Their bags were still in the car. They weren't planning to stay here very long. This was just a stop on their run-away mission. They had other places to be. Things to do.

"None of this would have happened if ya'll hadn't followed us down here," Ronnie harped.

I looked up. "We didn't follow anyone and it's your car that won't work buddy."

He rolled his eyes and went back to rubbing Emily's back and watching the fire like the rest of us.

The front door slammed open and the wind blew rain in as Dally slammed the door back shut. He had mud all over him and a scowl on his face. He stomped in front of us. "It's the radiator."

"No it ain't," Ronnie grumbled.

Dally smirked and wiped some mud off his face. "You know kid, growing some hair on your balls don't make you a man."

Ronnie hugged onto Emily. "Why do you even care? Why are you even down here in the first place? Last time I checked you didn't give a fuck about me or the rest of your so called family."

Dally pulled his jacket off and chuckled. "How is Pops?" He went over and touched the scar under Ronnie's eye. "Still a lovely son-of-a-bitch I see."

Ronnie swatted his hand away. "What do you know? You left a long time ago. Why don't you just answer the question?"

Dally grabbed the box of cigarettes off the ground and lit one. "Why you here anyway kid?"

"Stop callin' me a kid!" he shouted. "I'm fifteen Dallas!"

Dally laughed.

"This isn't funny!" Ronnie jumped up off the ground and took a charge. "Why are you here?"

Dally's mood spiked. He shoved Ronnie out of his way and kept walking. "You're over your head kid."

Ronnie didn't back off this time. He followed after. "What does that mean? You've been acting like this since I got here. Well here we are Dal, stuck together. Looks like it's time to start talking."

"Piss off."

Ronnie took a step forward. "No."

Dally stared him down. His eyes were filled with hate and destruction. They got that way every time Ronnie was around. Every time his eyes met his brothers they'd take new form and control his whole body. His eyes took him over.

The hate Dally stored up was filled with this negative energy that altered his perception. It was this feeling of destruction, and chaos, and most of the time, he couldn't control it.

I've seen this in his eyes before.

"Dal," I stood up, "come on."

His upper lip twitched. "What'd you say?"

The ends of Ronnie's lips curled up. "You heard me."

Dally took a strong step and grabbed the collar of his shirt, pushing his face into his. "What'd you say to me you little shit?"

"Dally," I said again. "Come on, he didn't mean it. Just lay off."

"Shut-up!" He turned back to Ronnie and slowly let him go. "You've always been a fucking little shit."

Ronnie shoved him and everything took a new motion. Everything was moving fast. Emily had gotten up from the ground to stand in-between them but too bad for her, there wasn't any room.

Dally pushed Ronnie into the wall of the barn. Dust and dubrey went flying. "Who do you think you're messing with?" he yelled. "Huh kid?"

Ronnie didn't flinch. "You're just like Pops ain't ya?" He laughed. "Some things never change."

Dally pulled him forward and slammed him again. "You think this is a joke?"

"Dally," I walked toward them. "Let 'im go. Just...calm down."

He slammed him again. "Huh, kid?"

"You look just like him," Ronnie said. "He'd be so proud he had a son like you."

Dally's hands moved to his neck. "Come to Tulsa huh? Take care of that old bat. Good cover kid." He tightened his grip. "Why are you really here?"

Ronnie chuckled. "See my big bro of course."

His face began to turn blue as Dally's hands didn't loosen up. Emily started shouting along with Pony. Ronnie's expression didn't change. He kept that smile on his face all the way through.

"You can't lie to yourself forever, man," he squeaked out. "You can't lie to her."

Emily began to pull on my arm. "Danni, stop him!"

Dally's eyes were red. His whole body was. He wasn't letting go. His grip was strong and tight.

"Dally," I started. "Just let him go!"

He didn't move.

I stood beside him. I placed a shaking hand on his shoulder.

"Danni he's killing him!"

I leaned forward. "Dally, let him go. Please?"

"We all have secrets," Ronnie let out. "Don't we?"

I stroked Dally's arm softly and began to whisper again, "You would never hurt him. You don't want to hurt him. Let him go, Dal. He's your brother. Let him go. Please. For me."

Slowly, his eyes drained. The veins in his arms went away and his muscles contracted back down. His grip became loose and Ronnie dropped to his knees, heaving and begging for air.

Emily ran for him and tried to help him. Pony soon joined her, asking if there was anything he could do to help.

Dally stood beside me, just looking at him. He didn't say anything. He just looked at him and what he had done. What he had been wanting to do for a while.

"Butt out," he hissed towards me.

I turned to him. "Dal-"

"You heard me." He grabbed his jacket off the floor and put it on. He headed for the door. "Stay outta this, Curtis."

The door slammed behind him the same way it did before. He was gone and all anyone heard was the thunder and the rain that followed with him.

Emily gazed up at me. "Aren't you going to go after him?"

I sighed and stared at the door, maybe hoping for more. I was always hoping for me. "It's not going to change anything. Dally is going to do what he wants...that's the way it's always been. It's never going to change."

"You okay?" I took a seat beside Ronnie on the floor.

He rubbed the sweat off his face and took a sip of water. "Woulda' been six feet under if it hadn't been for you I guess, huh?"

"Yeah...you're welcome."

Emily raced back over to us and put her hand on Ronnie's face. "Are you sure you're okay? You feel hot."

Ronnie held her hand and smiled at her. "I'm fine babe. Ain't nothin' that hasn't happened before. Trust me, I've been through worse with the guy."

Emily squeezed his hand. "You scared me to death."

"Don't worry babe," he assured her. "I can take that any day." He turned and looked at me again. "Can see having you has changed him some, huh? Any other day, I'd be gone."

I shrugged and hugged my knees. "Has he...he's always been like that, huh? Even towards you?"

Ronnie leaned back against the wall and swallowed. "It ain't his fault."

"What does that mean?" I asked.

He put his hand on Emily's shoulder to help guide him. He gently raised up and limped over towards the door. "I gotta take a piss."

Emily slumped down beside me on the floor. "I can't believe they're acting that way. Ronnie...he looks up to Dally...whether he wants to admit it or not."

"What was Ronnie talking about before?" Ponyboy asked. "About secrets and Dally lying?"

I rubbed my head. "You think I know?"

"Ronnie won't talk about it," Emily said. "He won't talk about his family at all. I try an' get him to talk about stuff but he won't."

I sneered. "Welcome to the wonderful life of dating a Winston."

Emily played with the tips of her shoes and sighed. "You love Dally, right Dan?"

I laughed. "Once in a while."

She looked up. "I'm serious."

I rested my head on the board behind me. "Yeah."

"Why didn't you stop Dally?" she asked. "Like, why didn't you run after him right there? If you love him so much then-"

"I learned a long time ago that I can't change things about Dally," I said. "You can't change a lot of things about anyone. I pick my battles. Dally is Dally. I love him, yeah, but I learned long ago I can't change him...and you can't change Ronnie."

Emily's eyes went back down to her shoes. "I really think I love Ronnie, Danni."

I sighed. She didn't know quite yet. She didn't know just how much that could hurt her. "I know you do."

"Really?"

I nodded. "You can see it." I looked down at her. "You can't run away with him though Emily. I'm not going to be the one to stop you, but you need to know how much you're giving up."

"Danni-"

"No, just listen." She stopped. "Your family loves you. You got a great life. Your mom would do anything for you and so would your brother. You're smart. You can do things in life. I know it seems like Ronnie is the only thing in your life right now that you got going for you but he's not. You have so much. You gotta decide if it's worth throwing that all away."

The house was silent. She was upstairs locked in her room again on the phone. Sarah knew what happened every time that phone rang at seven and who was on the other end. She knew why her grandma ran to her room to answer it.

She didn't fit in here. She didn't fit in anywhere she went and she'd been everywhere.

Sarah knew the bills were coming too. Her grandma would do anything for her mother, even if it meant losing her home. Sarah just wondered when she'd learn that she was never going to be grateful. That just wasn't her mother.

The doorbell downstairs began to ring. She leaped off her bed and ran to answer it.

She opened the door. "Oh, hey Johnny."

"Hey," he said softly. His hands went inside his pockets and his head darted back and forth. "Is, uh, your grandma home?"

"She's upstairs on the phone." She held the door open all the way. "You can still come in though if you want to."

He looked to the side. "Uh, no, I'll just-"

Sarah smiled. "Come on, we got food inside."

Reluctantly, Johnny went into the warm house. Sarah's grandma always kept the thermostat at eighty-five. She liked it warm. That was one thing Johnny liked about that woman.

Sarah led him into the kitchen where he took a seat at the table. "We got chicken-noddle soup or baked potatoes with everything you can think of to put on it."

"Um, the potatoes are fine."

Sarah grabbed a plate from the top shelve and a potato from the pan on the stove and began to fix it up.

"So," Johnny cleared his throat. "Are you and Danni friends now?"

Sarah slit the top of the potato. "I guess. I mean, I haven't heard from her in a while. I guess we might be."

Johnny nodded and fiddled with his hands awkwardly. "They're...no one can find them."

Sarah whipped around. "Danni?"

"Her and Dal and Pony," he said. "They left this morning and no one knows what happened to them."

Sarah didn't know what to think. "Oh gosh. I hope they're okay!"

Johnny looked down and nodded. "Yeah...me too."

Sarah slowly turned back around and went back to fixing his food. She had just gotten a friend and now she was gone...she thought she was her friend. Maybe she wasn't. Maybe she was just being nice to her. Maybe-

"Johnny!" a woman shouted. "Well boy you haven't been around here lately. Where've you been hiding?"

Johnny raised his head. "Hi Mrs. Johnson."

Betty laughed and walked over to him. "Boy, how many times have I told you to call me Betty? Are ya hungry now? I can-"

"I got it, Mamaw," Sarah spoke up.

Betty turned her granddaughter and smiled. She missed seeing someone in the house every day. "You're a sweetheart, Sarah. Thank ya darlin."

Sarah's checks flushed.

"How have you been doin' Johnny?" Betty asked. "Ain't been gettin' yourself in any trouble have ya?"

Johnny shook his head. "No, ma'am."

Betty nodded and patted him on the back. "You're a good boy Johnny." She turned and looked at Sarah. "Just like my Sarah. You two are good kids. Good kids."

She moved her head so no one would see the tears getting ready to fall. Sarah tried to sneak a glance but her grandma had become and expert at hiding tears.

"I better go feed that dog." She headed for the door. "Sarah, take care of Johnny will ya?"

She was out the door before Sarah could answer her.

"Here you go." She placed the plate in front of Johnny. "You want something to drink?"

Johnny slowly picked up a fork and started in on the floor. "Um, yeah."

"Milk okay?"

Johnny took a bite. It melted in his mouth and it took all the energy he had in him not to drool. "Fine."

Sarah placed a cup in front of him and poured some. "You'll have to mind my grandma. She just got off the phone with my mother and she isn't doin' so well."

"She sick?"

Sarah put the milk back in the fridge. "No." She sat down in front of him. "She likes ya a lot...my grandma."

Johnny nodded and kept his eyes on his food. "She's...she's nice."

"Yeah," Sarah said quietly. "She really is."

The rain wasn't letting up. Dally walked through the woods, ripping off loose sticks from trees.

His blood was running cold. He couldn't get his thoughts clear. He couldn't stop thinking about killing that stupid kid and having it all over. He just wouldn't stop it.

He twisted the chain on his neck. He wanted to rip it off and throw it in the mud and stomp on it. It didn't mean anything to him anymore. It was years ago the kid gave it to him. He knew he would never get rid of it though. He knew he couldn't do that.

He just needed to get out of here. He needed that stupid kid to get the fuck away from this place. Dally came here for a reason and this kid was just fucking everything up. He was just a black cloud over everyone. He needed to go back to where he belonged and never heard from again. That was the plan.

He may be half blood, but kid's got Winston in him...

And everyone knew it.

Pictures in a box at home. Yellowing and green with mold so I can barely see your face. Wonder how that color tastes. You were always so far away. I know the way so don't you run away like you used to do.

A/N: I haven't written Johnny in a while. I thought it was high time to give him some of the spot light. Reviews would be nice. :)