21.) The Crippled God - Somewhere In The Smoke
Success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm.
- Winston Churchill
MINAKO
This time we were taking is slow, savouring each step. I brushed my hands over Rei's shoulders, as I reached for her hair tie. As I removed it her hair cascaded around her face. She reached over, raising a hand to my face, guiding me in for a slow, lingering kiss.
My hands went to the buttons of her shirt, doing my best not to fumble with them as I worked at getting her undressed. When I stripped her shirt off I couldn't help but pause.
She was still much too thin in my mind, but it hadn't been all that long since we'd... discovered her struggles. I supposed that all the healing she needed to do would take time, we couldn't just snap our fingers and have her be completely recovered.
I settled my hand over the black mark over her sternum, the place the shadow had... I suddenly felt as though I couldn't breathe. My fingers remained on the evidence of her old injury, I was struck dumb by the weight of the emotion forcing its way through my soul. Rei's hand wrapped around mine gently as she moved it away from the mark, shifting my hand so that it lay on her shoulder instead.
"Don't worry, Minako." She whispered, her thumb running across my lips. Her dark eyes captured mine and just held them for what seemed like an eternity.
Some how during that time we ended up on the bed, Rei leaning over me as she brought our lips crashing together. I wrapped my arms around her as tightly as I could, holding on to her like she was my lifeline.
I laid next to Rei, feeling quite comfortable and relaxed. Simply lay there, letting my fingers trail over the scars that traced her shoulders and upper arms. I let my fingers come to rest on her most recently healed injury. The fresh scar tissue was raised in a thin that stretched across her arm. It was the one injury she had received while on Mars.
She'd only given us the basics of what had happened that day. Saying nothing more than the Martians had completely wiped out the shadows that were present on the planet and that the timely eruption of Mount Olympus.
"Do you mind if I ask you what you actually did on Mars?" I questioned, still running my fingers along the scar.
"I used the mountain of the gods to wipe the shadows off the face of the planet." Rei replied steadily.
"You told me the basics of it and I still can't fully fathom it, that was easy? I mean not the..." My voice trailed off not really sure how to say it delicately.
"The killing people?" Rei asked, her voice wasn't that dead emotionless tone but rather it was calm, almost relaxed. It sounded more like she was trying to ease me through it, just prompting me onwards so we could keep talking.
"Yeah." I agreed. "But the actual physical power needed to do set off the volcano...that was easy?"
She gave a nod, not really looking all that concerned or even proud of it. She was just...neutral, like that kind of show of strength was nothing.
"It took three of us to sink the island on Earth and you, alone, were able to set off a volcano and were able to direct the ta?" I clarified.
"Yes. It was just a matter of concentration. Other than that, there was no strain. It was easy, nothing all that challenging about it. If anything, keeping that power under control all the time is the harder task." Rei told me in an offhand tone.
I couldn't help but feel awed. I was talented at controlling my powers, it was just like flexing any muscle in the body; if I pushed too hard I'd hurt afterwards... and my talent was far more pronounced than anyone else I'd met on Venus. I mean, I'd never been pushed with my elemental manipulation the way Rei had been but the mere fact that Rei was constantly having to keep her power reigned in...
"You're amazing, you know that?" I told her.
"First time hearing it, actually." Rei said, I could hear that teasing tone in her voice as her fingers toyed with my hair.
I also had the nagging feeling that Rei might not have actually heard her powers and control talked about like that... or perhaps even herself. I cuddled closer to her, letting out a contented sigh. Trying not to let myself think about how worried I was about tomorrow.
When the silence continued Rei looked over at me, rolling on to her side and letting her arm rest against my hip.
"Are you scared?" She asked, my eyes jerked up to hers. "About tomorrow I mean, not of me."
I didn't answer.
"I just thought I felt something from you." She told me idly brushing her thumb against the bare skin on my arm. Then it clicked for me. Rei felt the same way about her elemental control that I sometimes did about my empathic abilities. Sometimes my control just slipped and things leaked out or I saw more than I meant to. And Rei had to worry about that with a power that could kill people, not just affect their emotions.
"I'm worried." I admitted, deciding to talk about it rather than try and keep it bottled up inside.
"Well, worried is better than scared." Rei said softly. "Do you want to talk about it?
"Mostly I'm worried about everyone else, I mean I'm fully aware that I could die tomorrow but that doesn't worry me."
"Minako, you know I'd never let that happen." Rei whispered and in a way that kind of made sense. I trusted Rei with everything. I trusted her to watch my back and I knew that dying was hardly the worst thing that could happen to me; feeling the loss of Rei's presence again, that would completely destroy me. And I had the feeling that she felt the same way.
"I'm worried about the others, how they're going to cope with the war. How things will change if we win. Things are falling apart, whole planets have been destroyed and I'm worried that as a society we can't take much more..." I took a breath, my thoughts turning back to the others.
"There's Ami and Makoto. Michiru and Haruka. And I know that Makoto will have the hardest time, she's much more pure than the rest of us in many ways. I mean, I know that the others will be able to cope to some degree... Ami will be able to rationalize ending a life. Haruka, I can't see her having a problem with it... not with the rage she feels in regards to the Terrans. And michriu..." I gave a short laugh, seeing the smile in Rei's eyes. "Michiru, if she cares half as much abut her own life as she did about yours, there won't be a problem. She was ready to fight my brother over you, I can't see her having trouble with this. Especially if she knows you and Haruka need her support in this."
"But Makoto, she's just..." I hesitated again. "She hasn't been exposed to the same experiences. I still don't know if she has it in her and I'm worried that's going to get her killed, the fact we don't know how she's going to react that's more worrying than the rest of us combined."
"I've been thinking about that too." Rei admitted. "And I was actually going to talk to you in the morning about it. But since you've brought it up..."
"You know how to fix the problem, don't you?
"Not exactly fix, but I do have a contingency plan. I just wasn't sure how you'd feel about it." Rei explained.
"Just tell me, Rei. You wouldn't bring it up if you didn't think it would work to our benefit. Or to prevent loss of life."
"I was thinking that tomorrow when, or if, we need to split up... that you should go with Ami." She told me calmly. I almost protested but then I realized what she was going for.
"You want to be there to cover for Makoto in case she can't go through with it... in case she hesitates."
"I'm the only one with the skill set and experience to actually be made responsible for bringing her through this alive. Either of you..."
"We'd probably get injured or die while attempting to fight her battle for her." I finished for Rei, then I looked up at her. "This will place you in more danger, won't it?
"Yes. But..."
"But not as much as the rest of us would face, it would be minimal. If one of us attempted this there's the chance of both Makoto and us dying... and with you, you're convinced that you can protect her with little risk to yourself. Is that what you're saying?" I asked her.
"Yes."
"And you're confident that you can do this without putting yourself at risk... well, more than necessary."
"Yes."
I studied her carefully, even tapping into her emotions a bit, trying to seek out any hint that she was lying to me. Then I nodded.
"Okay."
"Okay?" Rei replied sounding surprised.
"Yes. Do it. If the six of us are split up into groups that small go with Makoto. Ami and I can look after each other." I told her.
"So are you feeling better now that you've talked about it? Because I'm fairly certain that you shouldn't be up all night worrying." Rei prompted. I moved my arms more securely around her.
"They're not the only ones I worry about." I admitted. "I'm concerned about you too. I mean, I've got complete faith in you and your abilities but I still cant help but worry..."
"It's hard watching people you love go into danger, that won't changed even if you know they're fully capable of pulling through it alive. That worry doesn't go away."
I caught a hint of an undertone to her voice. Well two undercurrents actually, one was about me; the relaxation and trust and then there was the faint lingering fear over what had already passed, concern over a past event.
"You trust in my abilities..: I murmured, feeling surprised by this.
"You got Serenity to the shuttle back on Earth. You were able to protect her from the shadows and you did that without any harm coming to her or yourself. And then you and Haruka managed to save the others. Yes. I trust your abilities."
"And yet you don't think I could..." I started, but Rei cut across me. Already knowing what I was going to say.
"There's a difference between knowing that you need to protect someone and being able to do automatically the moment they hesitate." Rei told me. I could see the sense in her words. "So yes I trust your ability to defend yourself even if it's just you and Ami against a platoon. You'll be able to protect each other but no, I think that trying to do that with Makoto might be a bit too much for the both of you. I don't want to see either of you risk yourself over her. You know I can do this... and I'm not quite sure about you, which is why I won't chance it."
I smiled, bringing myself closer to her again. Her grip tightened around me, our foreheads were practically touching as we curled towards each other. I looked into her eyes.
"I didn't think that you had that many people you would be that concerned about going into battle." I noted, bringing up the second mixed emotion in her. "You've worried about someone fighting before this whole fiasco. You've been worried about whether or not they would live to see another day"
Rei's hand took mine.
"It was years ago, it was just hard to see. It doesn't bother me anymore." I could feel her comfort now but there was still the lingering memory.
"Who was it?" I asked.
"Michiru." Rei told me. I ran my hand along her arm. Of course it was Michiru.
"Michiru's already learned to raise a sword in the defence of her life. She hasn't killed yet but she's gone into situations fully prepared to kill or be killed. I almost didn't let her do it, I was ready to drag her away from the fight kicking and screaming but I... decided to trust her." Rei told me, she gave a bit of a chuckle. "It was one of the more difficult things I've done. I really was not comfortable with her out there with me, the whole time it felt like someone was trying to pull my heart from my chest. I expect tomorrow is going to be even worse with the two of you out there."
She met my eyes with a soft smile, it was only then that I realized the sheer ridiculousness of what we were doing. I laughed.
"We seem to be very good at this pillow talk thing. Discussing war and death."
"Well, you do love a Martian and the avatar of the God of War, at that. You probably should have expected that." I didn't hear any of the bitterness or pain in that comment that I was expecting. Rei's voice sounded almost light. "But I agree, we should change topics. No use having you stressing out over tomorrow."
"I was not stressed." I protested.
"You were stressing." Rei disagreed, I could see a bit of a smile on her face as she laid back and stared at the ceiling. "I could feel it."
I paused for a moment, still a bit confused over why
"So what then, are you going to distract me?" I asked her. She gave me a glance.
"What, I didn't distract you enough earlier?" She asked, a small hint of humour in her tone.
"I'm Venusian, Rei. We tend to need lots of distracting." I told her, she smiled then rolled back on to her side so we could bring our lips together. I was desperately hoping that tonight wouldn't be our last night together.
REI
I woke earlier than normal as was my standard practice the morning before a battle. However, this time, instead of getting up to begin my preparations I took a seat in front of the hearth and lit the fire. I felt as though I needed to do this. I needed to at least try and see what was going to happen.
I leaned back against the foot of the bed, looking into the flames trying to figure out what to do. I let myself relax into the meditative state.
Almost instantly I was drawn into a chaotic mess of sights, sounds, and sensations. A sweeping sensation filling me as I was pulled through the vision. Things jarred to a stop, allowing me to focus for a second on what was in front of me.
A wave of black crashing against a wall of shields, then things began to spiral around me; dropping me down beside Michiru and Haruka. The sand beneath my feet shifted as I watched them wheel their horses around to face a horde of shadows. The horse shied, throwing Haruka into the writhing mass of shadows. Things flashed again, leaving me standing beside Michiru as she cried over Haruka's body with the waves lapping at her clothes. I took a step forward, wanting to comfort her even though this was just a vision.
I stepped not closer to Michiru like I had intended but was instead transported to a war torn camp, resting beside Minako. She was just pulling a sword from Kunzite's body, standing over him with a bloody sword and behind her loomed Beryl; looking outraged. I didn't need to see any more than that to tell what was going to happen there.
I opened my eyes as I felt Minako's hand settle on my shoulder.
"You're up early." She commented, leaning down to kiss my cheek. I smiled as I stood up.
"I always am on these mornings." I told her, she wrapped her arms around me.
"It looked like you were in the middle of a vision. Did you see anything useful?" She asked me. I nodded.
"I got a few tips that might help us carry the day." I replied, knowing that I wouldn't let what I'd seen come to pass. Even if it killed me.
Minako smiled, letting her hand rest on my face. I brought my hand up to hers, just relaxing into the easy interaction between us. Minako looked like she wanted to bring something up but was worried about ruining the moment.
"Just ask." I told her, stepping back to start putting on my armour.
"Last night you seemed oddly... at peace with yourself and what you can do. You didn't seem at all worried about what you would have to do today to pull through this war. It was like... nothing could touch you and not in the way that it was when you faced beryl's last army. You're feeling this, you're not numbing it out." Minako said, the question in her voice was clear. "What changed? How are you able to face this?"
I stepped closer to her settling a hand on her shoulder and bringing the other hand up to brush hair out of her face.
"It's because you love me and for the first time in, well, ever..." I explained, feeling like this was the simplest thing in the world. "I want to come through this alive, Minako. I have a reason to fight; it's you and nothing that will change that."
I could see tears in Minako's eyes for just a brief second before she closed the rest of the distance between us in a fierce hug. I could feel her tears falling against my cheek as she leaned our heads together.
"You're crying." I heard myself say and for a moment I was deeply concerned that what I'd just admitted to her had been the wrong thing to say... but then her hold on me tightened.
"I'm just happy, Rei." She whispered reassuringly, keeping her body pressed up against mine. Her voice was sounding a bit rough. "You have no idea how good it is to hear that."
"I feel like if I can make it through this one last battle, I can leave it all behind. So I can just..." I said, my voice trailing off as I felt tears coming to my own eyes. I was fairly certain they weren't of happiness. I didn't know how to describe them.
Minako leaned back a bit so she could see my face, she reached up cautiously like she expected me to pull away from her. Her hand settled on my face, her thumb moving to wipe away the tear that fell.
"So I can just... be with you." I saw in Minako's eyes that she could see everything I wasn't saying. Be with you... So that I'd no longer be a weapon. So that I'd no longer have to run or fight. So that I'd no longer experience pain.
"We can do that Rei. We can just go and not look back once this is all over. We'll just disappear and be together. We'll leave it all behind. The responsibilities. The fighting. The pain. Everything." She told me, pulling me down for a breathtaking kiss. She was saying everything I wanted to hear and telling me that the future I wanted was possible.
Hope, I decided. That's why I was crying.
We had only just finished the briefing with Prometheus, he and the other Ephors had come up with a battle plan during the night and they seemed confident. I had the feeling their confidence was because the battle plan... was merely the distraction.
A war would be waged so that the six of us might be able to circle around behind Beryl's troops to where she and her generals were holed up. And once there we would end this war.
"A headless army is in for a hard time." Michiru quoted at me and I found myself smiling for the briefest of moments. Then there was a sense of dread as certain memories came flooding back. I'd been thinking about it earlier this morning but... I hadn't expected this to be so hard to bring up. It was something that I kept nestled away from even my own mind and thoughts whenever I could.
Seeing Minako this morning as she slowly and methodically donned her gear... had brought everything rushing back. The fires. The lack of control. The insane rage. I knew seeing her out there, in danger, possibly fighting for her life... I wasn't sure how I was going to get through this.
"Minako..." I said quietly, trying to draw her attention discreetly. There was one last thing I wanted to talk to her about before we left on our mission. I hadn't brought it up earlier because I hadn't wanted to alarm her or make her worry more than she needed to. But now that we were about to go to war she needed to know.
No, she deserved to know.
Minako looked over at me, probably drawn by the lack of emotion in my voice. I just barely nodded in the direction of the door, still trying to avoid the others' attention. Thankfully she didn't do anything remotely suspicious in the others eyes as she slipped out of the room. I followed her, shutting the door quietly behind me.
"What is it Rei?" She asked, a hand coming up to cup my cheek. "You look worried."
"There's something I didn't tell you earlier."
"I.." I started then had to stop as my voice felt too shaky to go on. This scared me worse than anything else, bringing this part of my past up wasn't easy.
"Rei, it's okay. You can tell me anything."
I sat down on one of the benches, resting my elbows on my knees trying to figure out how to say this.
"Minako, I just... I need you to know something about me." She sat down next to me, resting her hand in the middle of my back. I remained hunched over, glaring at the wall across from us.
"I'm not always in control. Sometimes... I slip and it's like its not even me anymore. It tends to happen when... people I love are threatened or in danger. And I didn't want you to go out there without knowing that you'll need to..."
"To what Rei."
"You might have to protect yourself from me as well as from them. I... when I lose control like that there's no way for me to be sure that you won't get caught in the middle. I just need you to know that."
"I've never seen you lose control before Rei. When did this..."
"The first time it happened, I was six. It was the day my mother... died. It took me a long time to piece together what had happened, my memories around it were fragmented. But I know now what I did and what I'm capable of. I was six and with my power I tore through two dozen soldiers, slaughtered them."
"And that was before I even learned how to conjure a flame on my own. Now that I've been trained, honed into a weapon, I don't want to think about what kind of damage I could do. You might need to deal with me. Use emotional manipulation, whatever, just make sure you take me down. I don't... I don't want you guys to get hurt because of me."
"I know you know how to handle me, so you're going to have to do that." I told her, still glaring at the wall across from me. Minako reached down, her hand coming to rest under my chin as she drew me to face her, forcing me to meet her eyes.
"No Rei, I don't know how to handle you. I know how to love you." She told me, I let out a bit of a laugh.
"Yeah. Okay, we'll use your word for it. But you have to be ready to take me down if need be. Do you promise me?" I asked, I needed to know if she could do this for me. I needed to know if I could even go in to battle near them, if she couldn't do this... I would simply tell Prometheus I needed to be placed away from them. He would understand. Minako looked into my eyes trying to search something out in my gaze, then she nodded.
"Okay. But only if you tell me the other thing you're not saying." I looked over at her, letting out a deep breath.
"I almost went into it willingly once before. It was so... incredibly tempting, like a drug I just couldn't turn away from, I wanted to do it. I wanted to feel the fire burning through my veins as I laid waste to those..."
Again I let my voice trail off, having to take in a steadying breath and calm myself again. Even now it was hard to maintain control when I thought of that day. My emotion was ready to break free, sparking to life again with little help.
"Those..?" Minako prompted, trying to help me start talking again after the silence.
"Those soldiers, there was an attempted coup while I was on Neptune during one of my visits. They threatened Michiru. They threatened the people who raised me. I wanted nothing more than to burn them from the inside out and laugh as they begged for mercy."
I felt sick even admitting to the extent of my anger and emotion that day. I normally despised the thought of raising a sword or hand against anyone but that day had... it had changed me. And even now, whenever I thought back on that day... I still felt that insane desire to bring ruin to all those who had stood against me. I wanted to bring pain and hurt and some distant part of me wanted to take every possible drop of pleasure from it. I wanted to enjoy myself as I tore through armies.
"But you didn't?" Minako asked quietly, her hand still rested on my back. I shook my head.
"No. I didn't but afterwards, when the threat was gone... that feeling didn't leave. I wanted blood to be spilled that day. I wanted to fight, I wanted to wound, I wanted to kill. And I don't know why." I gave a wry smile. "A blood thirsty Martian, who would have thought...?"
Then I laughed, leaning back against the wall just looking up at the ceiling, Minako's hand took mine.
"You're not going to slip, Rei. I know you won't. You turned away from it then and..."
"But I didn't resist it. I didn't turn away from it." I told her giving a bit of a more honest laugh. "I brutally murdered a stand of trees three miles outside of the city, burnt down a couple hundred square meters of old growth cedar. I just lost it, couldn't get it back under control until well after dark. Over six hours of me trying to return to something resembling a human being."
"You did resist it, you resisted it until you were able to let go of it where you wouldn't hurt anyone. You have more self control than anyone else I've ever met. And if I do feel you slipping, I'll stop it before it even starts, you won't do anything to any of us, Rei. I can promise you that."
"Alright. That's all I needed to let you know. I just needed to prepare you in case..." I didn't really know how to finish that.
In case I...Went berserk? I fell to the blood lust? I went on a murderous rampage? I felt inclined to slaughter hundreds of people, friend or foe?
Minako's hand squeezed mine.
"In case you needed my help." She completed for me. I could hardly believe this, her calm cool acceptance was bringing me peace. "Now we should go meet the others outside, it's nearing daybreak and we need to get moving if we want to reach our destination."
I stood, doing a quick check of my numerous weapons then walked into the room we'd left from to pick up my bow and quiver.
"So you're clear on the plan?" I asked Minako. She scowled.
"I still don't like the thought of you being our scout. I don't want you going off alone." She told me. "To be honest I don't even want you out of my sight, really."
I gave a bit of a chuckle as I fastened the rest of my gear to my body, patting carefully over my pockets, assessing the small collection of medical supplies I always carried when I faced the potential for warfare. Which, to be fair, had been mot of the time on Mars.
Everything was where it was supposed to be and I'd be able to find it with ease if I or any of the others were injured. It wouldn't be the first time I'd had to perform first aid out in the field. Luckily this time Ami was around in case I got hurt, I wouldn't have to stitch my own wounds.
"I'll be fine Minako, honestly it's probably better this way." I said, then I caught the look of towering anger that was building on her face. I back tracked. "No, not because of... that problem but because I've been doing scouting work since I was twelve."
"Twelve?" Minako asked softly, looking like I was breaking her heart. I looked away.
"We should get going." I told her, she reached down and took my hand in hers, giving it a gentle squeeze. She didn't say anything as we headed to join the others though.
MINAKO
Together the five of us followed the markings Rei left us, the darkness that still clung to the sky was fading fast. We needed to speed this up or we'd be caught in the open when daylight finally arrived. There was the sound of hoof beats coming our way, instantly we were on our guard.
We were all faced the noise, looking for any hint of movement in the dark. We were up against shadows, there was no way to really know if we were being watched. Then Rei appeared from the gloom, swinging down off her horse.
"You can't have found them already" Haruka commented sounding disbelieving.
"Well yes and no. I've discovered that they have a rear guard. We would have stumbled right into them if I hadn't seen the portal open. It seems like they expected us to do something like this."
"So what do we do?" Michiru asked Rei, who looked to me. I nodded for her to continue.
"Well, I was actually hoping the five of you would stay here while I took another look around and tried to come up with a plan." She replied, her eyes not leaving mine. She was clearly asking for my permission and no one else's.
"How much longer until daybreak?" I asked Ami, looking away from Rei.
Ami glanced down at her timepiece as Rei gave her a little bit of light to read by.
"An hour and a half approximately."
"How far does a rear guard usually stay behind the main body of the army?" Haruka asked Rei but it was Michiru who answered.
"Well, they're there to protects the main army from attacks from the rear, either during an advance or a retreat. Close enough to keep an eye on the army's back and maintain contact with them... but far enough away to have a differing perspective on the battlefield. Too close and they won't adequate time to react to threats. Though the opposite is also true." She told me, with a glance at Rei. "But if the portal was left open that might not matter. Beryl could have multiple rear guards spaced through these hills."
Rei nodded in agreement.
"That's exactly what's bothering me." Rei said, I caught a hint of something else in her eyes.
"What is it you're not mentioning?" I asked her softly, hoping she wasn't planning on doing something stupid if I let her go out there and scout. Rei frowned.
"I can sense them... the Shadows. It's like a tugging in my chest, I can tell where they are or where a portal is going to open." She admitted. I nodded, looking back on the events of the past it probably should have been obvious. When she'd first gotten back from Mars she'd told me of the appearance of the portal and later in the queen's debriefing she'd reacted to the appearance again.
I frowned a bit.
"Okay. You have forty five minutes." I told her to which she gave a sharp nod.
"I doubt it will take that long." She replied, then I noticed she was unbuckling her sword belt and removing some of her other weapons. She caught my look.
"I'm not taking the horse, I need to be quiet and fast." She explained, passing her equipment to both Michiru and I. I slung her sword belt over my shoulder while Michiru took the collection of knives that Rei had pulled from various straps about her body.
Then I watched as Rei pulled her bow from over her shoulders and reached back almost absently to check her quiver. She gave me a nod.
"Half an hour at the most." She told me, then she turned and disappeared into the black again.
REI
I made my way swiftly and silently through the hills, pausing every so often and trying to sense the location of any new shadows. After ten minutes I sank down to my knees and shut my eyes, doing my best to concentrate only on the shadows. I could feel them writhing just at the corner of my senses, I could tell they were there even if I couldn't see them.
I frowned. The only other darkness I could sense was the main army. Nothing else was showing up. I turned my attention back to the location of the rear guard and made my way towards them as cautiously as I could.
Even when I was concentrating on them I couldn't figure out how many there were in the group. I dropped to my stomach and inched towards the crest of the next hill, where I lay quietly and tried to pick out black from the darkness.
It took a few minutes before the shapes and feelings at the edge of my senses separated enough for me to pick out individual creatures. I closed my eyes and counted, slipping back down the hillside once I had gotten an accurate read on their numbers.
I began my journey back to the others. By my count fifteen minutes had gone by.
AMI
This time we could when Rei approached we all felt relief rather than anxiousness. She immediately looked towards me, slinging her bow back over shoulders.
"You bring along those maps?" She asked. I nodded, pulling the parchment from my saddle bag and handed it to her. She gestured for us to come closer and spread it out on the ground, lighting a small fire in the palm of her hand so we could all see.
"Do you know exactly where we are on this map?" She asked me. I glanced up at the stars, removing the sextant and bearing compass from my belt. After a few moments worth of calculation I knelt down and scratched a small mark on to the map we were relatively close to the spot where the cliff faces near the sea faded away into a smooth slope. Rei smiled then she looked towards Minako.
"Well Commander, how do you feel about splitting up the party?" She asked, I looked between the two of them unable to understand the silent communication that was passing between them. Minako nodded.
"What kind of split are you thinking?" Minako asked finally.
"Three and three. You, Ami, and Makoto then Haruka, Michiru, and I."
"Explain." Minako said, her tone falling somewhere between an order and a suggestion. Instead of looking at Minako, Rei turned her attention to Haruka and Michiru.
"Hate to ask, but how do you feel about being a diversion? Think you can be fast enough?" Rei questioned. Haruka grinned at her.
"You forgetting who you're talking to, Martian? We can handle it." She asked, settling a hand over Michiru's. Rei's eyes flicked to Michiru's, clearly asking the same question. Michiru nodded and it was only then that Rei looked back to Minako and began to explain.
"Michiru, Haruka, and I go to this point." Rei started, gesturing to one spot on the map next to the cliffs. It was almost directly between the main army and the rear guard. I frowned. "You three will come along this side and hold here until you see the shadows start to leave."
"How will we know when they're leaving when we can't even see them?" Makoto asked. Michiru looked at Rei, seeming like she had figured it out.
"If I know Rei, it will probably be because they'll be on fire." She said, shaking her head at Rei. "You're going to do your best to piss them off."
"No. I'm going to do what I can to draw their attention to you and Haruka. While they're coming after you two, I'll set up on this cliff and wait for you to draw them on to the beach. There the two of you will have the advantage. I'll remain on the high ground to cover you and but once you reach the beach I'll go to join the others and you'll be on your own to deal with the regiment."
"And what will we be doing?" Minako asked.
"You'll be going through the Terran portal. Should take you three exactly where you need to be." Rei told us with a bit of a smirk. "That acceptable, Commander?"
For the briefest second I thought Minako was going to argue with Rei over setting herself alone, or for dividing us up in that way, or about the whole plan in general but she didn't. She just sat back on her heels for a second with a thoughtful look on her face.
"Let's get a move on before we lose the cover of darkness." She ordered, getting to her feet as she passed back Rei's sword belt. Then Rei was joining Haruka and Michiru, discussing a few more details of what she had in mind as she fastened her weapons back on.
I looked to Minako as she turned to face Makoto and I.
"Ami, you're on point. Without Rei here to show us the way I'm fairly certain you're the next best at figuring out where we're going to. Makoto, stay as close to her as possible." She ordered, Makoto nodded but hesitated.
"Where are you going to be?"
"Rear guard. I'll stay a reasonable distance behind the two of you in case Rei missed something."
"You think she did?" Makoto asked but I saw the look on Minako's face.
"No." She said shaking her head. "But it's what Rei would do. You can never be too careful, I'll catch up with the two of you when I'm reasonably sure that nothing is going to get the drop on us. Now mount up. We need to get moving, we don't want to take too long to get into position. Knowing how the three of them ride they're probably half way into position already."
MICHIRU
Rei directed Haruka and I into position, giving us advice and saying how she was going on a head to light a few small guiding fires do that we could find our way to the beach with easy. I was still a bit uncomfortable with her going off alone but if Minako could put up with it so could I. Rei had also taken our horses with her, saying it would be better if it was impossible for us to be separated.
There was an odd look in her eyes like she'd seen something she wished she hadn't. I wondered briefly if she'd seen one of us die in a vision and that was why she was putting us on one horse... her horse actually. Somehow Prometheus and my parents had managed to save the one thing on Mars that mattered to Rei.
Despite the fact that her horse was one of her most valuable companions... I knew why she was doing this. She and Aithon had seen years of war together and she trusted him to look after Haruka and I. He was accustomed to battle and wouldn't spook, he knew how to keep his rider's seated firmly on his back. And most importantly, somehow, he always knew how to find Rei. She was giving us a way to join up with the rest of them without worry even if the portal shut before we could get to it.
Haruka was seated behind me, Aithon had absolutely refused to let her take the reins; which both Haruka and Rei had found highly amusing. I reached forward and stroked his neck as we waited for Rei's signal.
She said that the moment we saw fire we needed to ride towards our first marker as fast as we possibly could. Behind me I could tell Haruka was starting to get a bit tense.
"You nervous, love?" I asked, reaching back to rub her leg.
"More excited, really." She replied, pressing her lips to my cheek as she wrapped her arms around my waist.
MAKOTO
Ami, Minako, and I waited in silence for the first sparks to fly. Rei was clearly waiting for something, they had to be in position already, they hadn't had that much farther than us to go. I looked over to Minako, wondering if something had happened to them. Minako looked over and met my eyes.
"They're alright." She told me. I raised an eyebrow. "I can feel Rei's emotions still. She..."
Minako paused to give a quiet laugh.
"I think she's fussing a bit over Michiru and Haruka." She explained. "She's got this protective air about her... and yet she's worried."
I found myself grinning. Ever since I began to actually understand Rei I'd realized she was actually quite softhearted. We'd all fallen under her protection but the lengths she'd go for Michiru and Minako was actually quite sweet.
I looked over at Ami, her gaze was intently focused on the landscape across from us. Her eyes never once straying from one particular spot, I had the feeling she had calculated out all the bearings and distances and knew exactly where the other three were situated.
I cast another quick glance back at Minako, I knew if Ami had been the one off on her own I'd be intensely worried. Even with Rei I was concerned. What if the shadows didn't take Haruka and Michiru as bait and instead went after her? Minako reached over and touched my arm.
"Rei..." She started, then hesitated. "Rei can handle herself."
I nodded, logically I knew that but I was still concerned. Ami however looked over, tearing her eyes away from the horizon for the first time in five minutes.
"Does this have something to do with the bloodwrath or battlesleep the Avatars of Ares can suffer from?" She asked. Minako looked surprised.
"Did she tell you about this as well?" Minako asked Ami sounding shocked. Ami shook her head, returning her attention to the horizon in front of her. I glanced between the two of them in confusion. What in the nine hells were they talking about?
"I saw something in Rei once when we were sparring... well, it was while she was teaching me. It was like she just disappeared for a few moments but then she stopped and told me, in no uncertain terms, to leave her alone for a time." She admitted with a bit of a sigh. Minako looked confused still.
"But how did you find out about... it?" Minako asked, even in the darkness I could tell Ami blushed a bit.
"Well. I might have spoken to Chryses and Prometheus... and Nereid." She muttered. "I asked Chryses to describe some of the Bonehunter's history and he brought up the last Avatar of Ares. He mentioned that great power came with a cost that was rooted in their emotions. It was why Menoetius preached about peace and not letting your emotions control you."
"After that I asked Prometheus a few questions about his views on the last Avatar, his side was wildly different, he explained that in his early years Menoetius had brought so much destruction down on the Martian people that everyone was afraid to oppose him and so they had peace. He told me that he had suffered from the bloodwrath."
"Finally, I asked Nereid about Rei... I was up front about my questions with her. I didn't want to intrude too much on something that Rei wanted private. If Nereid refused to answer I would have dropped the matter entirely... but she didn't. She called the condition a battlesleep... a term I find myself much more comfortable with than bloodwrath. It seems to suit what I've seen of Rei, she simply lets go of her conscious decisions and lets herself react, the time I saw her come close... it was different. It wasn't like she was simply blocking it out, it was like she had gone somewhere else entirely and all that was left was instinct and rage."
Minako nodded but she was frowning.
"And you didn't tell me any of this because...?"
Again Ami flushed.
"I wasn't sure if you would still accept Rei for this. It was long before you two... really connected." Ami told Minako. Minako nodded again.
"Understandable." She admitted, then a flash of fire appeared on a nearby hilltop. "And that would be our signal."
REI
I ignited sparks at Aithon's feet and sent streams of fire from there to the gathering of shadows, killing a number of them and injuring a dozen others. I kept the trail of fire lit so they would have a clear path to follow towards Michiru and Haruka; howling with rage and agony they took the bait. Hastily I increased the flames at the markers so Aithon could follow them more easily.
I watched from the clifftop as the shadows began to descend on the three of them. I pulled an arrow from my quiver, closing my eyes and homing in on the feel of the shadows as they raced towards my friends. I let one fly, picking off one of the frontrunners; igniting it just before it hit home. I sent the flames arcing from it to several of the others; funnelling the others to where I wanted them to go.
I could feel the shadows' progress towards Michiru and Haruka and I had to push aside my nerves and trust in them. I kept firing arrow after arrow at their pursuers until they were almost to the beach and my quiver was empty. I concentrated, pulling back the string of my bow one last time and releasing an arrow of pure fire, letting it block off the shadows return path; they would now have no choice but to face Michiru and Haruka on the beach.
Michiru could put the wall of fire out when they needed to come back to join up with the rest of us. And that was all I could do for them, I needed to join up with the others before something went wrong on their end. I pulled myself up on to the horse Michiru had ridden and struck out towards the portal.
HARUKA
I felt an arrow whip past my face, embedding its self into the body of one of the shadows that had been moving to cut us off. A small flash of fire sprang up from it, burning the shadow into nothing. I shifted myself behind Michiru, adjusting my grip on my sword as we neared the path down to the beach.
I could only just make out the spot where Rei had set up, every so often I was able to pick out where her arrows were coming from. She was keeping us safe, watching our backs as we provided the diversion for the others.
Even with a good hundred or so shadows in hot pursuit I felt safe. I trusted in her and Michiru to bring me through this. I was just here so that Michiru wasn't going to be alone. I had seen the look in Rei's eyes that she would have rather sent me along with the other three but she had let me go with Michiru... just because its what she knew I wanted.
As one of the shadows came up beside us, I lashed out with my sword, neatly severing its leg as I integrated some of my bloodtrait into it. I laughed a bit.
"Maybe I should have kept up with the jousting tournaments, hey?" I asked Michiru. "Some more mounted combat experience would have been nice."
She laughed as well, wheeling the horse about as we hit the sand at the water's edge. I tightened my hold on her waist.
"Just remember I'm not that strong of a swimmer, yeah?" I prompted as I started to call on the howling winds. "At least compared to you."
"What? Do you think I'd let you drown?" Michiru laughed in response, bringing her hand towards the incoming shadows, a great wave sweeping across the beach towards them.
"No, but you'd find my floundering hilarious." I retorted, covering Michiru's undefended side as shadow lunged for us. The sheer force of the wind I controlled sliced it and three others in half. "Now call on a big damn tidal wave so we can end this."
"Of course love, I'd hate for you to get impatient." She replied, concentrating firmly, letting go of the reins. Aithon reared back slightly, stomping on one of the shadows that we hadn't noticed phasing into being before us. I quickly sent a gust of wind to tear it apart.
"Remind me to tell Rei I'm stealing her horse." I muttered, mostly to myself then closed my eyes as I heard the sound of rushing water.
I expected the wall of water to hit us violently but somehow Michiru managed to part it around us and bring it flooding back together, washing away the horde of shadows. I kept the wind swirling about us protectively as I held on to Michiru. I could feel the spray of the sea meeting with the wind and I knew right then that I had never felt more secure than I did right now. Even in the midst of battle I had never felt more at home.
I opened my eyes again, watching as the water began to flow back out to sea... Michiru hadn't even paused before spurring Aithon back up the hill. He seemed to know exactly what Michiru wanted.
"Yeah, totally stealing the horse." I laughed as we swiftly made our way to the Terran camp. Michiru reached down and pinched my leg.
"She'll hurt you." She told me with a laugh as the wind blew through her hair. I hugged her close to me again, feeling free and clear minded. We had a war to win.
AMI
The moment we entered the portal it felt like someone was trying to pull my stomach out of my body, a spinning sensation threw us off balance as we emerged in the Terran camp. Makoto was the first to launch and attack, electrocuting a handful of shadows that had come our way. Minako stepped up beside her, a smooth movement had her cutting one of the men nearly in half. The unfeeling look in his eyes told me everything I needed to know. These things we were fighting were no longer people, it was an empty shell of the man it had been before. A husk.
I raised a wall of ice of to one side, knowing that we didn't want to defend ourselves from all sides. We were in an unfamiliar camp, grossly outnumbered, and trying to figure out how we could possibly get to their leaders.
I solidified ice under the soldiers feet as Minako warped the metal of their weapons, driving them into their owners. Makoto seemed focused on keeping the swarms of shadows at bay.
I brought a pillar of ice erupting up from the ground, skewering a shadow that had been trying to catch Minako off guard. These odds weren't exactly making this fight easy and I could tell that we were slowly getting overwhelmed. I glanced back at the portal, hoping that reinforcements were on their way.
I noticed that the portal was ever so slowly beginning to break down.
"Minako." I said, looking over at her. "We need to find a more defensible position. The portal looks like it's going to break down before Rei or the others can get to us."
Minako looked over her shoulder at the portal and nodded.
"Do you think you can manage to block of their access to us?" She asked. I sighed, not really sure if I had the power to do that.
"I can try." I told her, working on creating a massive wall of ice to stop more shadows from joining the battle. We needed some space if we were to find Beryl and the others. The wall of ice finally settled, giving us a bit of room to breathe. At least for the moment, I could feel the shadows and husks whittling down the wall trying to get at us.
I glanced over my shoulder again, the portal was barely there anymore. I looked back at Minako.
"Any idea where we need to go?" I asked her. She closed her eyes after using her skill to wrap a coil of metal around the remaining shadows in front of us, which Makoto sent electricity through until they burst into flames.
I raised my sword and hands, waiting and watching while Minako tried to feel out Beryl's location. Her eyes opened as the wall was brought down and a swarm of screaming monsters descended on us.
"We need to go to the north." She yelled over the noise as we moved closer together so we could watch each others backs.
And then, just as the portal was closing, Rei dove through it; sending a stream of fire towards the shadows that had been closing in on us. She rolled under the attack from one of the husks and rammed her sword through its neck as she got back to her feet. Immediately I saw her and Minako glance at one another before she stepped up alongside Makoto while Minako drifted closer to me.
I instantly realized what Rei was doing, she was trying to take care of Makoto knowing that out of all of us she would be the one to struggle the most with actually killing someone.
MAKOTO
I felt incredibly reassured by Rei's appearance at my side, she stepped in just when I needed her to. A quick glance to my right showed that Ami and Minako were already starting to fight their way to the north.
"We need to follow them." I told Rei, she gave a grim nod and raised a hand... sending a spiral of flame out in front of us.
"Take a different path, when they see us they'll most likely try and avoid a confrontation with us directly. We want to end this as quickly as possibly and that means forcing them to engage." Rei answered, leading the way into the inferno and circling to the north-west while Ami and Minako went to the north-east.
We emerged a few seconds later, coming face to face with another horde of shadows. Rei wrapped her blades in fire and began to hack her way through them, I sent an arc of lightning through the monsters that were closing in behind us; standing back to back with Rei.
And it was then that I saw them. The few humans in a sea of husks and shadows.
"Rei." I said softly, when she glanced at me I nodded in their direction. Rei's eyes narrowed like she found this whole situation somewhat familiar.
"Let's go." Rei told me, blasting another path through the enemies towards the Terrans. I could just make out Minako and Ami through the chaos, they too were fighting their way towards the generals.
One of the Terran's came to meet the two of us head on, Zoisite, if I remembered correctly. I sent a current through my weapon as a coil of darkness stretched between the two of us. I could tell that Rei was watching me closely even as she took on wave after wave of husks, blood muddying the ground in front of her.
The shaft of my spear turned away the blow from his sword, I let my power flow into the metal sending a huge shock into him. He nearly dropped his weapon, he paused, shaking his hands out before lunging at me.
I nearly hesitated before bringing my spear out in a thrust, catching him along the arm as I ducked beneath his swing. I was trying to bring myself to kill him. I knew that it would be easy to do, send a jolt of electricity into him and stop his heart. But the mere thought of it still made me sick.
I was forced to jump backwards as Zoisite slashed outwards in retaliation, nearly catching me across the stomach. Again I saw an opening in his defences but couldn't bring myself to take it. I allowed myself to retreat a bit more until I was back to back with Rei again. I looked across the battlefield, watching as Ami and Minako were slowly forcing Kunzite and Beryl in our direction.
I caught Ami's eye, realizing that she needed Rei and I. They needed help. And then I did it... and felt part of my soul die as a result. My weapon had been driven into his chest.
It was then that I felt myself hesitating but I forced myself to yank the weapon back out of his body, I could feel my hands starting to shake a bit as I saw the blood running down my spear. I felt a rush of heat and saw that Rei had raised a wall of fire around us.
REI
I looked over at Makoto, seeing the horror and distress on her face. She needed a bit of time to grieve, I raised a circle of fire around us.
"Makoto, take a moment just to come to terms with this. I can give you a bit of time to do that." I told her as I pulled my bow off my back again and drew back the string, forming an arrow of fire.
Makoto knelt down beside Zoisite as I sighted down the arrow and released it, sending it through three shadows. Then I drew back the string again, taking out one of the shadows that had managed to get behind Ami and Minako. I could watch their back while I gave Makoto her moment of rest.
After releasing seven more arrows I looked back down at Makoto, she folded Zoisite's hands over his chest then I reached down and placed my hand on her shoulder. It was time, we needed to get moving again.
Makoto nodded and I could see the resolve in her eyes as she got to her feet. I dispelled the protective circle and dove back into the thick of things. I heard the crackle of electricity as a massive lightning strike hit the spot next to Zoisite's body, rippling across the ground until it came into contact with several shadows. Together Makoto and I fought our way towards Minako and Ami.
MINAKO
The howl of agony that Kunzite let out when he saw Zoisite die was heartwrenching. It was pure pain and rage. I could sense the growing conviction and hate in his heart... and every last drop of it was focused on Makoto as she and Rei approached us.
He started to lunge towards Makoto, darkness flying from his fingertips as he prepared t rip her apart. I couldn't help but step into his path, choosing to ignore the crowd of husks that had been closing in on me. Ami would take care of them.
I used my metal manipulation to trip him up, causing him to stumble to the ground. Then he turned on me, his face contorted in rage. I was struck by how much he cared for Zoisite, back on Earth I had picked up on his fondness for his fellow general but I hadn't imagined that it would be this intense.
Kunzite loved him and they meant a great deal to each other, that much was obvious now. I raised my sword as he got back to his feet with a snarl.
"Out of my way Minako." He spat, I steadied myself... hearing hoof beats closing in on us. A quick glance over Kunzite's shoulder showed Haruka and Michiru joining us... cutting down huge swaths of enemies.
Then I returned my attention to Kunzite, blocking his next attempt at trying to get to Makoto. She and Ami had joined up again and were doing their best to hold off Beryl. Rei was surrounded by a sea of foes but when her eyes met mine all I could see in them was a smile. She was fine, she just wanted me to look after myself.
I parried Kunzite's next lunge, trying to find an opening in his defences. The darkness that spun around him wasn't leaving me many opportunities to end this quickly.
BERYL
A column of fire exploded between Minako and I, cutting off my access to her. I turned around knowing exactly who I was going to have to face.
"Rei." I murmured, I should have known that she wouldn't let me engage Minako... let alone kill her. Even now, though I knew that she was alive, seeing her still surprised me. She was walking calmly towards me bringing her sword up in front of her as she approached. The fire dancing around us blocked off anyone who might wish to intervene between the two of this.
"You don't have to do this Rei." I told her softly, already knowing that she was a lost cause. Rei's jaw clenched, sparks practically flying from her eyes.
"Yes. I do." She replied before diving forward, dropping underneath the automatic response of the darkness within me. And that was when I felt it.
The darkness.
Not just in me... but in her. I glanced across the battlefield to the place where Zoisite lay. A forced soul conversion he had said.
I could feel the darkness spreading through her like an infection, reaching out and slowly exerting its own will on her. I reached out towards it, feeling the cool reassurance of its power.
Rei's next attack drew my concentration away from that darkness, forcing me to meet her fire with my shadow. Then I reached out again, grasping the power inside of her and trying to bring her to her knees. I didn't want to kill Rei, even now. She was simply misguided, there was no reason for us to be fighting.
I could hear Rei make a choked noise, hesitating as she felt something yanking at her soul. The chains that were wrapped around her existence were bending, slowly, to my will. I would only disable her until this was over then I would release her to do what she wanted. I'd even spare Minako for her, despite the fact she had killed my dearest general.
I could see Rei struggling with what was going on inside of her but then she met my eyes, and it was like the darkness just disappeared. Something, someone, else had taken Rei's place... a terrible might and conviction was evident in her otherwise empty eyes. I felt my heart breaking, I would have to kill her now that I couldn't control her.
I drew my own sword, meeting her frenzied attack head on. But it wasn't enough, she was beating me back... forcing me closer and closer to the flames that wrapped around the two of us.
REI
The same agony that had gripped me upon my resurrection was returning, I could see in Beryl's expression that she was using whatever was inside of me to try and gain control over my actions and will. I gritted my teeth as I struggled with the darkness that was suddenly threatening to overcome me.
I let out a strangled noise, fighting to keep my hold on my own free will. I looked deep into the flames that surrounded the two of us, catching the smallest glimpse of Minako's hair in the chaos. I met Beryl's eyes, knowing what I needed to do.
I needed to let go and embrace what I could do, if I wasn't present... there was no way for Beryl to control me. I needed to surrender to the God of War.
The sensations of the world around me faded, until I felt disconnected from the battle before me. It was completely peaceful here, the blood was no longer pounding in my ears. The sound of fighting was nothing but a distant memory. The sword in my hand felt as light as air. And the fire was singing in my veins wanting nothing more than to burn the world into nothing. I lunged forward with a flourish of my sword, feeling only the briefest hint of resistance on Beryl's part.
It was like someone else was controlling by body... and yet, it was still me. The calm and acceptance allowed me to focus on only one thing, the woman before me. I forced her back until she was cornered against the flames I had summoned.
I paused, allowing both of us to stare our fates square in the face before we met in one last thunderous clash. Faint hints of darkness wrapped around my arms where my hands gripped the hilt of my sword. I took a step backwards, shaking them off as I removed my sword from Beryl's rib cage.
The fire around us went out as Setsuna stepped into the ring, carefully lowering Beryl to the ground.
SETSUNA
The bloodwrath faded from Rei's eyes as she stepped closer to the two of us. I gently pressed my hand over the bloody wound as Rei knelt down beside us. Nothing would come near us at this time, that I knew for certain.
Beryl reached out to Rei, clutching Rei's jacket in her hands... I brushed my hand through her hair, trying to ignore the blood leaking from her mouth. I couldn't take my eyes off hers as I could see the life fading from them. It would be a long time before I got to experience any sort of emotion like this again.
Beryl's fingers tightened around Rei's clothing.
"You could have saved us." She whispered, letting out a bit of a cough. Rei looked up at me, confusion and puzzlement clear in her gaze. I shook my head, now was not the time to answer those questions. I kept my attention focused on Beryl as I took her hand in mine.
And together Rei and I watched as the one truly magnificent woman I could have loved... died.
REI
I rose from my position next to Beryl and Setsuna, I could see the pain in Setsuna's eyes and couldn't stand to watch it any longer. Instead I turned my attention to the battlefield where the two armies were facing off.
The shadows and husks were slowly descending into chaos after the deaths of their leaders. I felt an odd sense of guilt rising up inside of me after the death of Beryl. A splitting headache, not unlike the ones from my visions, was developing and threatening to take over. I sat down on the rise and watched as the battle played itself out.
The pain in my head and chest was only increasing, I raised a hand to my forehead, trying to rub at the spot where it was hurting. A hand settled on my shoulder. I glanced up, seeing Setsuna's calm and steady gaze... showing none of the grief or pain I knew she was feeling.
"It will pass." Setsuna told me, her hand still resting supportively on my arm as she gave me a sad smile.
"That's a bit cryptic." I muttered, bringing my hand away from my head to rub at the tightness in my chest... trying to ignore the agony that was spreading.
After a time Setsuna removed her hand and turned her attention back to Beryl, whose body I was still seated beside. Then another hand gripped my shoulder, instantly I knew it was Minako. She knelt behind me, settling her hand over my sternum and the place I had been feeling the ache... and the sensation began to lessen.
"We've won." She breathed, letting her arms tighten around me. I smiled.
"We won." I agreed.
BERYL
The darkness around me was both stifling and freeing at the same time. I could feel other presences in the black but first and foremost was the incredible might and power of the Elder God.
"We lost." I said to the emptiness around me. The words seemed to echo around the space in which I resided, causing my ears to hurt and pain to form in my mind.
The formless cloud around me vibrated in what seemed like a chuckle. The swirling mass of chaos and darkness closed in around me. The never ending and all consuming sense of purpose about it was making it clear to me that this wasn't a loss... it was simply a chance to try again. The elegance and simplicity of its hunger, purpose, and patience caught me off guard again.
Words couldn't fully capture the sensation, I had failed... but it seemed like we would return.
AN: Well, I can't tell if the lack of response is reassuring or not. Thinking maybe the ending of this story isn't as relevant or important now and maybe I just just kick off the sequel without finishing this one and just take my time on the ending until I'm satisfied. So that's a thing that happened. Warning: it will have spoilers. Anyway, stay tuned and blah blah blah, see twitter - KarmicRogue for updates.