Kei's bag feels overly heavily on his shoulders, weighing him down like it's full of bricks. The day has passed by in a haze of academic information and people asking if he's okay – to which he always responds with a noncommittal 'I'm fine.' Whether they believe him or not is their problem. Keiji and Morisuke have been at the forefront of the questioning, and Kenma less verbally so, with sporadic concerned glances.

The most unnerving has been Tetsurou, he's been quiet all week and hasn't asked 'what's wrong' even once. Not that Kei's complaining, it's just unusual for Tetsurou not to… care. Who is he kidding, it fucking hurts. He thought that—

Kei has been withdrawn since Monday, barely responding with more than single word answers, not focussing on discussions or in class and not even putting much effort into basketball practice. His friends notice but they're considerate enough to keep it to themselves. Or, they're Shouyou, who seems to think that his bad mood is because of the practice game loss. At least the little shit has been less snappy; not that Kei has the capacity to acknowledge that at current.

Tadashi walks beside him silently, knowing when Kei needs silence, knowing how to deal with his mood better than Kei knows how to deal with it himself. He supposes that's the point though, if he knew how to deal with it he wouldn't be in the mood at all. Under pretence of 'we haven't had a sleepover in forever, Tsukki' they make their way to Kei's house after school. It's Friday afternoon. Friday the 27th of September. The day he wishes he could skip over, the day he wishes he didn't have to live through.

His phone has vibrated numerous times throughout the day. Kei's only checked it once, this morning in the car with Tetsurou and Kenma. Most of the missed phone calls and messages from a contact he only keeps in his phone to know to avoid the number. Contact name: mom. Such a short word; one syllable, three letters, each letter of which made his stomach roil and made him want to throw his phone out the window. Instead, Kei shoved it deep in his bag and didn't look at it again all day.

"We're marathoning the Jurassic Park movies, right Tsukki?" Tadashi's voice draws him from his thoughts, right when he needs it.

Kei only hums an affirmative. Tadashi, unfazed by it, grins cheerfully.

"Good! I haven't seen Jurassic World yet, is it good?"

"Not as good as the first, but still good."

"And by your standards that means it's amazing! I was worried about the CGI, because in a lot of movies now days the CGI is so good that it looks too real. If that makes any sense. And don't get me started on 3D, I mean, it's nauseating…"

Tadashi rambles on, keeping up the conversation with ease. Kei likes listening to the sound of his voice, it keeps him grounded and out of his own depressing thoughts. Tadashi has been spending less time with Hitoka this week and has been attached to Kei at the hip any time possible. Kei would feel bad about it but with the kindness in Hitoka's smile he knows it's okay, she possibly even suggested it. Not that Tadashi wouldn't be there if she hadn't, but he'd certainly look guiltier about it than he does.

So lost in Tadashi's one-sided conversation about dinosaurs, modern film and, somehow, Star Wars, Kei doesn't notice his brother's car parked out the front of their house as they arrive. He unlocks the front door and enters his home robotically and almost shouts in alarm when he's tackled into a hug from Akiteru.

"Happy birthday Kei!" Akiteru says, his arms tight around Kei's shoulders. His brother left for work too early this morning to see Kei before school and is apparently making up for it now.

Kei clicks his tongue. "You're heavy. And why are you even home? Aren't you supposed to be at work still?"

"I came home early to hang out with my little bro on his special day!" Akiteru pulls back and holds Kei's shoulders, searching his face. "Seventeen," he sniffs dramatically. "They grow up so fast…"

Kei groans and breaks free of his grasp, pushing past him. He can hear Tadashi laughing behind him, probably relieved Kei is acting more like his usual self; if anyone can make him feel more at ease it's Akiteru. He's been working so much through the week that he's barely been home. Which has made Kei's week even harder.

Kei pauses when he walks into the kitchen. Sitting there on the counter is a box wrapped in green and blue paper with chubby cartoon dinosaurs on it and a large red bow on top.

He turns back to Akiteru with an eyebrow raised. "I thought I told you no presents."

Akiteru shrugs, grinning carelessly. "I didn't listen."

Guilt surges through Kei. He's already too much of a burden on his brother, having to take him in and feed him and clothe him and put a roof over his head. There is already so little he can do to pay back his brother's kindness.

"Open it," Akiteru says, nodding towards the gift.

Dropping his bag on the ground Kei walks over to bench and sits at the counter before carefully taking the present off the counter. It's not overly heavy but it's sizeable and rectangular, fitting nicely in his hands as he turns it over slowly. He can practically feel Tadashi and Akiteru jittering excitedly and deliberately takes his time unwrapping the paper.

"Tsukki!" Tadashi complains.

A smile curls at the corner of his mouth but immediately drops when the dinosaur wrapping paper comes free. His eyes widen as his mind processes the image on the box.

"Aki… This is too much…" Kei breathes, turning to face his smiling brother.

Akiteru shakes his head. "No it isn't, you need them. I was talking to Tetsurou a few days ago and he was speaking about your reduced peripheral vision due to the frames of your glasses. These will help, they have a broader field of vision and you'll be able to make those magical plays with Keiji."

Kei looks back down at the box and swallows hard. It's true, sports glasses will help him in games, but they're expensive. Akiteru is stubborn though, there is nothing Kei can say to make him take them back.

"Thank you," Kei says quietly, fiddling with the edge of the box.

Arms drape over his shoulders as Akiteru hugs him from behind and presses a wet kiss to his cheek. "That's what big brothers are for!"

"Gross."

"Try them on!" Tadashi enthuses, bouncing up and down next to him. "You'll have to wear them to practice on Monday."

Opening the box Kei runs his fingers along the smooth curve of the black rims before pulling the glasses out and holding them between his fingers. They're elegant and the shape will certainly open up his field of vision. Taking his glasses off and setting them on the bench, he pulls the band of the sports glasses over the back of his head before settling the glasses on his face. The kitchen goes from soft, blurred edges to sharp, crystal clear focus.

"Do they need adjusting?" Akiteru asks, touching the strap that's firm against the back of Kei's head, his blond hair curling around it. "I adjusted it to my head so it should be okay."

"Its fine," Kei responds as he turns back to face Tadashi and Akiteru.

"How do they feel? Is everything clear? Is the prescription right?"

Kei smiles. "They're fine… They're great."

"Okay, but I want a full report after your training on Monday," Akiteru demands and Kei rolls his eyes as he takes the glasses off and sets them carefully back in their case. "What do you want for dinner? I was thinking pizza but it's up to you birthday boy."

"Pizza sounds good."

"Pizza is perfect for our Jurassic Park marathon!" Tadashi beams happily.

"Seriously? Again?" Akiteru groans, though his smile is as broad and gleeful as Tadashi's. "You watch them every year Kei!"

"He has to have at least one tradition," Tadashi says.

Akiteru chuckles. "Very true."

"Did you get me cake…?" Kei asks surreptitiously.

"You told me not to!"

Kei sighs and mumbles, "The one thing I actually wanted you not to listen to."

It's midnight by the time they finish all four movies and Tadashi is asleep on the bigger sofa, which is good because that's where he was going to be sleeping anyway. Akiteru drapes a blanket over Tadashi as Kei quietly turns off the television and turns the lights off. In the hallway that connects their bedrooms Akiteru stops him with a hand at his elbow.

"You know I love you, right Kei?" Akiteru whispers into the quiet, dark hallway, his eyes watching Kei intently. "That I'd do anything for you?"

Kei snorts a disbelieving laugh and nods. "How can I not know that? Everything you've done for me, everything you've given me…"

"And I'd do it again and again and again," he says sternly, pulling Kei into a hug. "You deserve all of it… You deserve better."

Akiteru's voice breaks and it makes twists painful in Kei's chest, leaving him unable to respond with words, merely gripping tighter into the back of his brother's hoodie. Kei wishes he could believe it, wishes that he felt better about himself and considered himself worth the effort. For now, at least, it's enough to know Akiteru believes it.

"I love you too," Kei says quietly as he pulls away.

"Sleep well, Kei."

Akiteru pats him affectionately on the shoulder before walking to his door and closing it behind him. Slowly, Kei makes his way into his own room. He's quick to numb the emotions that ache through his mind and body, nothing good can come of letting himself lose control.

With meticulous care, concentrating on every small action, he changes into his pyjamas, sorting and folding his clothes, before digging his phone out of the bottom of his bag and getting into bed. Turning the light off, Kei settles under his covers, tucking them right up under his chin. Turning his phone back on he goes through the messages he received through the day, diligently deleting the ones he doesn't wish to see.

[07:34] Koushi
Happy Birthday you giant dork! Please at least TRY to enjoy your day, that's all I ask. Oh, also, call me soon! You've been too caught up in your obsession (and I'm not talking basketball –_^) and I'm feeling underappreciated. All my love xoxoxo

[12:01] Daichi
Hey kiddo! Happy Birthday! Hope you're having a wonderful day but don't have too much fun, make sure you stay safe. Look forward to seeing you again soon, it's been too long.

Kei huffs a laugh, scrolling through the birthday messages from his Karasuno friends. From the overly aggressive well wishes from Ryuunosuke to the short, anxious message – that has undoubtedly been written out numerous times and finally completed with Yuu's help – from Asahi. He scrolls through them all until he gets to the last message Tetsurou sent him, Tuesday, something insignificant about basketball.

Kei clenches his jaw, staring at his name on the screen until his vision hazes over as he loses focus.

On Monday, when Tetsurou had asked what he was doing on Friday, for a stupid, hopeful second Kei truly thought Tetsurou was asking him out. Then he was both annoyed and excited by the idea that Tetsurou may have figured out that it's his birthday. But then… Nothing. All week. Nothing. Like the idiot he is, Kei thought that Tetsurou—

Turning off his phone's display, Kei curls in on himself and swallows back the lump that has formed in the back of his throat. An uncomfortable reminder of how alone he is. The sad part is he has no one to blame but himself, for never talking about what happened… For never letting anyone in.

Tetsurou turns over and his eyes flutter open slowly, reluctantly. He groans as sun aggressively invades his vision. It's such a nuisance. Why didn't he close his blinds?

Wait… The sun…

His eyes widen and he lurches upright, muscles complaining with the action after being asleep for such a long time. Scrambling for his phone among the mess of sheets on his bed, Tetsurou finally finds it and swears loudly when he sees the time. 12:46pm, he's late.

"Shit, shit, fuck—!" Tetsurou cries out as he falls out of bed, hitting his shin against the sharp corner. "Mother of fuck!"

Ignoring the pain he makes his way into the shower and quickly scrubs the sleep off himself. Leaving his hair as the lost cause it is at the best of times, Tetsurou dresses and hastily throws some clothes in a bag before barrelling downstairs. His parents are sitting at the kitchen counter as he rushes past, leisurely eating lunch, smiling and happy.

"You slept in," his mother remarks. "Wait, Tetsu don't forget the cake!"

Tetsurou skids to a halt and runs back into the kitchen to grab the cake from the fridge, holding the box carefully against his chest.

"Thanks mom! You're a life saver," he says, quickly kissing her on the cheek and patting his dad on the shoulder before running out. "See you later!"

"What's that about?" Tetsurou hears his father's deep voice. "Must be important."

It is important dad, he thinks. Very important.

Whatever answer his mother gives Tetsurou doesn't hear it because he's already out the front door. Setting the cake down on the passenger seat, Tetsurou starts the ignition and takes extra care, even in his hurry, as he drives to 111 Sendai Street. Slinging his bag over his shoulder he gets halfway to the front door before swearing loudly and going back to his car for the cake, which he forgot… Again.

Tetsurou's knuckles finally rap against the front door and, despite his high fitness levels, he feels out of breath and flustered. When the door opens though, he grins broadly as he's faced with a sleepy looking Kei in dinosaur print pyjama bottoms and a baggy t-shirt.

"T-Tetsurou?" Kei mutters, gold eyes wide and disbelieving. "What are you—?"

"Happy birthday Tsukki!" Tetsurou says, feeling like he should hug him or something, but unable to with the cake box in his hands. "I saw you walking home with Freckles yesterday and figured you might want a quiet night with your brother and best friend. I also planned to come earlier but kinda slept in… But it looks like you didn't get up long ago either."

Kei blinks and closes his mouth from where it had dropped open as Tetsurou rambled. He looks a little dazed as he glances down at himself when Tetsurou indicates to his pyjamas, a light flush rising on his cheeks as he sees what he's wearing.

Kei has been distant all week, barely paying attention to anything, not even basketball. And Tetsurou has let him be distant, has given him the space he clearly needs, but has always been right there if Kei needs him. It's a difficult thing to balance; caring about someone and wanting to help them without pushing them too far, without pushing them away. Kei's the type of person that has a well-defined line and Tetsurou is very cautious around it.

"Thank you," Kei speaks quietly, sounding uncertain, as he pushes open the door. "Do you want to come in? We were just finishing breakfast, or lunch, I guess."

"Of course I want to come in. See this bag on my back Tsukki, I'm here to stay!"

"Wonderful," Kei groans sarcastically and sounding more like himself, it makes Tetsurou chuckle as he enters. "What's in the box?"

"Cake."

"…What kind of cake?"

"Yummy cake."

"Tetsurou."

"Have patience birthday boy."

When they enter the kitchen Akiteru and Tadashi look up at Tetsurou in surprise, their eyes flickering to Kei before settling back on Tetsurou. Akiteru is smiling, pleased to see him, but Tadashi looks nervous.

"Did you tell him?" Kei asks Tadashi immediately, his voice low with a hint of a threat, which may or may not be real. It's always difficult to tell with Kei, but considering it's Tadashi, Tetsurou doesn't believe the threat is real.

"Sorry Tsuk—"

"It's not Freckles' fault," Tetsurou interrupts, setting the cake down on the counter. "I found out accidentally. Your birth date was on your signup sheet for the basketball team. It was a mere accident, but you should be happy Tsukki, this way you get cake!"

Normally Tetsurou might go on to lecture Kei about keeping his birthday from his friends, from not allowing them to celebrate with him, but this isn't a normal situation. Kei is hurting and needs support. It's not for Tetsurou to decide what form that support comes in.

"I got it yesterday," Tetsurou continues as he lifts the lid off the box. "But hopefully it's still good. I remember Aki saying you like strawberries."

Tetsurou looks up to see Kei's eyes almost twinkle as he stares at the Strawberry Shortcake in the box. Then Kei's vision becomes more focussed and he frowns before glancing up at Tetsurou with a questioning expression. The room is quiet, for some unfathomable reason, and Tetsurou can feel Akiteru and Tadashi's eyes on him. He feels like he's missing something.

Akiteru shifts – the first to recover from… whatever is happening – and laughs a little awkwardly. It snaps Kei's attention away from Tetsurou, glancing back down at the cake.

"Strawberry Shortcake is Kei's favourite," Akiteru explains.

"Oh, well, lucky guess based off strawberries then."

"Are you sure that information wasn't on my team signup sheet too?" Kei questions, the hint of mischief returning to his eyes.

Tetsurou gasps dramatically, his hand clutching at his chest. "I am offended, Tsukki! I pay attention and retrieved that information all by myself. Or, guessed it all by myself."

Tadashi's phone chimes and he smiles when he checks the message. "Hitoka's here. Are you sure you don't mind me going Tsukki?"

Kei sighs. "Yes, go, I'm not going to take up any more of your time together."

"It's okay Freckles, I'll look after the birthday boy," Tetsurou says, slinging an arm around Kei's shoulders. Tadashi still seems uncertain, his brown eyes flickering between them. His uncertainty dissipates into embarrassed blushing when Tetsurou winks and says, "Have fun with Sparkles."

"I-I'm not—we're not… It's n-not like th-that," Tadashi stutters, tripping over his bag as he goes to pick it up.

Tetsurou chuckles. "I know Freckles, calm down. Go get your girl."

A smile finds it's way onto Tadashi's face. "Okay, I'll see you Monday."

With a vigorous wave Tadashi leaves. It's been three weeks since Hitoka's birthday party and the two of them have hardly spent any time together. With their initial anxieties and Tadashi spending most of this week close to Kei, worried about him, they've only had one date. Hitoka's said they've been talking a lot more recently, so Tetsurou isn't worried about it. In fact, they seem to be getting along very well. Just as he knew they would.

"Ah, youth," Tetsurou says. He can practically feel Kei roll his eyes.

Akiteru scoffs. "You sound like an old man."

"And you're only seventeen," Kei adds.

"Wow, you guys are brutal. I'm outnumbered, getting double teamed by the Tsukishima bros. Tadashi come back! I need help!"

"I'm going to shower," Kei says dryly, ignoring his dramatics, shrugging out from under his arm and walking away. "Don't break anything."

Tetsurou watches him go with a grin. There have been a few unusual moments, but Kei seems to be back to his usual snarky self, swapping quips and rolling his eyes, even though it's obvious he's enjoying himself. It's nice to see him like this again after being so dead to the world all week.

"I'm glad you accidentally found out and came over to hang out with him. I'm glad Kei has friends like you, Tetsu," Akiteru says. Tetsurou turns to find Akiteru regarding him with a warm smile. "I'm grateful and even though Kei may never say so himself, I know he's grateful too."

"Oh, Tsukki did thank me."

Akiteru's smile broadens and he shakes his head. "Of course he did. Anyway, I desperately need to get some work done so thank you for keeping Kei company."

Patting him on the shoulder, Akiteru leaves him alone in the kitchen. Tetsurou has been here a many times by now and has a tendency to make himself at home, always comfortable in his friend's houses, so it doesn't worry him. He puts the cake away in the fridge for Kei to eat later, moving things around to make room for it.

Tetsurou makes his way into Kei's room to wait for him, walking past Akiteru's room where he's locked himself up to do his work. Dropping his bag next to Kei's bed, Tetsurou walks over to the small bookcase filled with science fiction and fantasy novels he would never think to read, and wonders which is Kei's favourite. In front of the books sit numerous dinosaur figurines, dinosaurs of different shapes and sizes that Tetsurou couldn't name if his life depended on it. He runs his fingers over the spikey spines and the sharp toothed jaws, until he picks up the tall one with the long limbs.

The door shuts behind him and he barely turns his head to see Kei enter in his peripheral. He's dressed in navy blue Adidas track pants and a white t-shirt. His blond hair is darker with dampness and messy from haphazard towel drying. Judging by the way Kei jolts he didn't notice Tetsurou standing there.

"What are you doing?" Kei questions.

Tetsurou runs his thumb down the dinosaur's neck and turns to face him. "What's this one called?"

"Brachiosaurus," he responds instantly.

He nods, repeating the familiar word. "It's kinda cool. You know, for a dorky dinosaur toy."

Kei snorts a laugh. "Says the guy wearing a t-shirt of Schrodinger's zombie cat."

"Hey, Erwin Schrodinger was a genius," Tetsurou says, making one corner of Kei's mouth curve into a smirk. It feels good to be able to purposefully draw that amused expression from him. "Okay, so I have an idea—"

"Oh great," Kei groans, lowering himself to sit at the foot of his bed. "This ought to be good."

"Oh come on now, when are my plans ever bad?"

Kei cocks his head and raises a single eyebrow at him.

"Okay, fine. Just hear me out. And don't interrupt until I'm done," Tetsurou says, using his commanding Captain voice that never seems to work on Kei. He nods his assent nonetheless. "I know you don't want to celebrate your birthday, but I thought you might like to invite Kou and Keiji over to—ah, ah, no interrupting!" he demands as Kei opens his mouth to undoubtedly complain. "They won't know it's your birthday, we don't have to tell them. I know for a fact they're not doing anything tonight and I think it would be awesome to have a chill evening with them. Well, Keiji will probably know, but you know he won't say anything, dude's a saint… To you at least. And Kou's… Kou."

When he's finished speaking Kei is regarding him with narrowed eyes, considering his proposal. Tetsurou had carefully considered his options to get Kei to at least have an enjoyable weekend all through the week and practiced his speech for many hours. He's hopeful, he thinks it will be good for Kei. But again, the decision is Kei's and all Tetsurou can do is suggest it.

"Fine," Kei answers finally. "But no telling them it's my birthday and no… doing things."

Tetsurou smirks, subduing his need to bounce up and down with excitement. "Yes, we'll just sit there doing nothing."

"You know what I mean Tetsurou."

"I know, it's okay Tsukki, we'll just watch movies or something," he says, slumping down on Kei's bed and into his usual position with his head hanging over the end. Tetsurou gets out his phone and sends a message to Koutarou. "Keiji is super lazy and likes doing nothing as much as you do. And Kou will do whatever Keiji does, even if he complains about it."

"And no making out in my house."

"What are you trying to do, kill Kou? That's like denying him oxygen."

Kei shrugs. "I doubt the few brain cells it'll kill will even be noticeable."

"Harsh," Tetsurou says, though he's laughing. His phone buzzes almost instantly and he reports, "Okay, they'll come over at seven… Hey, what does Aki do? He seems to work an awful lot."

"He's a lawyer."

"Seriously?" he questions in surprise. Tetsurou turns his head abruptly and Kei's a lot closer than he thought, a mere foot from his face, but he doesn't have time to register that. Kei's messy hair is pulled back from its usual place covering his forehead, and reveals to him, once more, the crooked pale scar at Kei's temple. Tetsurou swallows hard as he stares at it, and when he meets Kei's eyes they seem to quickly avert to meet Tetsurou's.

"…What?" Kei asks, frowning.

Tetsurou turns his head so that he's gazing at Kei's desk, upside down, and breathes out heavily. Saying what he's about to is a risk, but he needs Kei to know.

"I know you won't want to talk about… what happened. But I can tell it's been affecting you lately and I know it's the reason you don't want to celebrate your birthday. I also know I'm over stepping the line here… But I can't just sit back and—" Tetsurou cuts himself short, carefully controlling his emotions. "If you ever need anyone to talk to, I'm here, whenever you need. No judgement, no obligation. Just… Whatever you need Tsukki."

In the wake of his speech the room falls agonisingly silent. Slowly, Tetsurou turns his head to Kei, who is staring wide-eyed at him. Kei's surprise fades with the sorrow that falls across his face. His fingers are clasped tightly together in his lap and he gazes down at them.

"I don't like celebrating my birthday," Kei starts, his voice quiet and low, filled with emotion in a way Tetsurou has never heard before. "I don't want to celebrate because I'm not… My existence is not worth celebrating."

Tetsurou feels his eyes widen and his breath catch. He uprights himself and turns to face Kei.

"Don't," Kei interrupts before he can say anything. Tetsurou freezes in place, staring at the back of Kei's head helplessly. "I know what you're going to say, that I am worth celebrating, I've tried to convince myself of it enough times. But it's too recent, I can't just…"

Kei pauses, sucking in a deep breath and letting it out shakily. Preparing himself. Tetsurou remains quiet, allowing him all the time he needs.

"It was stupid. I thought I could trust them… Oh how wrong I was," Kei huffs a rueful laugh, his jaw clenching tightly. "It was just before Thanksgiving last year that I decided to tell my parents that I'm gay. Thought I'd start with my mother, she's gentle and kind. At least I thought she was. I told her after school and she was shocked but nodded along in all the right places, smiled as reassuringly as she could muster. Even though it was awkward and uncomfortable I thought it was okay. That she was still just a bit surprised, that in time she'd get used to it. There was no yelling or confrontation. I was relieved."

"I told her that I wanted to wait a few days to tell my father, that I needed time to prepare for it. He's not the easiest person to talk to. But then, when he got home, my mother sat us down at the table and announced that I had something to tell him…"

Kei swallows hard and then leans his head back against the bed, gazing up at the ceiling. Tetsurou feels like his muscles have locked into place, like if he moves it will somehow ruin the moment that he's not sure he wants to experience. But he has to, for Kei.

"I couldn't understand why she did it, but I trusted her. I trusted her… So I explained, once again, that I'm attracted to boys and that I've known for a while and didn't know how to tell them. That I was scared to tell them. That I only wanted them to accept me. That I needed them to accept me. Suddenly, with my father by her side, my mother started scolding me, acting offended and telling me that I was confused. She begged me to say that I was lying, that it was some kind of elaborate joke. I didn't even know how to respond.

"My father remained quiet for a long time. I was too busy being confused by my mother's actions to notice the fury boiling inside him. Until he exploded," Kei's voice catches around the word.

"He called me an abomination… dragged me out of my chair and started shoving me towards the door. Telling me to get out, telling me how disgusting I was and that he didn't want me in his house. That I was no longer his son. That I was a filthy animal. That didn't deserve a home or a family or friends or to be cared about. That I was a worthless piece of shit and a waste of space."

Tetsurou feels the itching tingle of a tear roll down his cheek, leaving his skin wet and cold in its wake. Something is his chest tightens painfully and he feels like he can't breathe.

"I resisted him, pulling back as he furiously tried to get me to the door. I was smaller then, skinnier, and he was bigger than me. There was no point fighting, but I did, I was too panicked to do anything else. I shouldn't have resisted…" Kei says, his voice quiet but clear, carefully controlled. "As I was pulling back he lost his grip on me and I stumbled. Hit my head on the metal edge of a table. I don't remember much, just the throbbing and weakness and blood and my parents adamantly refusing to come in the ambulance with me. Lying and saying they'd drive to the hospital themselves."

Kei sighs, raising his hand to his forehead and tracing the scar with his fingertips. "Luckily my friend's older sister's a nurse, she called her brother, who called Koushi, who called Aki. At least I have them…"

As the shock wears off anger sears through Tetsurou, sharp and hot, curling his hands into fists and tightening his jaw. But his blurred vision focuses on the trembling of Kei's shoulders and all that's left is sadness. There is no one here to blame, only someone to comfort.

Wiping at the wetness on his face, Tetsurou slowly rises from the bed and kneels down beside Kei, his glassy gold eyes unfocused and distant, too broken to cry. Tetsurou pulls an unresisting Kei against his chest, wrapping his arms tightly around Kei's shoulders. He feels his legs wobble with the effort of holding them both up, and leans them against the bed, burying his head between Kei's neck and the bed.

He had known it was bad, saw the hurt in Kei's eyes sometimes and the understanding in him when Keiji was hurting. But this… The emotional torment and self-loathing created from the utter lack of acceptance from the two people who are supposed to accept you no matter what… It's too much. No wonder he's guarded. No wonder he keeps everyone at arm's length. No wonder he's mature. He's had to deal with pain beyond his years. Kei doesn't deserve it. He deserves happiness and to be proud of himself and—

"You have so many people who care about you," Tetsurou says, his voice wavering even more than Kei's had as emotion overwhelms him. "You're so important, Kei. You never deserve to feel like you're not important, not even for a second."

They sit there in silence for a long time, merely listening to Tetsurou's erratic breathing and Kei's rapid heartbeat. Kei shifts, but doesn't move away, and the movement almost startles Tetsurou, who was so comfortable – and still sleepy – that he almost forgot where he was.

"I've never told anyone about that," Kei admits softly, relaxing and leaning his head against Tetsurou's shoulder. "Not even to Aki. Thank you for not pushing me… And for listening. Thank you, Tetsu."

Those words warm through Tetsurou and he smiles. "You're welcome, Tsukki. That's what friends are for."

Kei stiffens against him, as if he's surprised and thought they weren't friends, as if he thought Tetsurou wouldn't be there for him. Abruptly Kei pulls back and pushes his glasses up to rub at his eyes. Tetsurou sits back and stretches out his muscles that have gone stiff from being in the one position too long.

"I need cake," Kei mumbles, rising to his feet.

"And what the birthday boy wants is what the birthday boy gets."

"It was my birthday yesterday."

Tetsurou grins. "Haven't you ever heard of a birthday weekend?"

Kei rolls his eyes before walking out of the room.

"Hey, hey, hey!"

"Koutarou, inside voice," Keiji scolds as Tetsurou lets them in the front door of Kei's house. "Kei's brother is working."

"Hey, hey, hey," he stage whispers, which isn't quiet at all.

Keiji sighs. "That doesn't mean you should repeat it."

Tetsurou chuckles as he gives Koutarou a bro fist and leads them into the open kitchen and living area. Through the afternoon Tetsurou and Kei watched Dinosaur and had a huge debate – quietly – about the Mesozoic Era; which mostly came about because Tetsurou intentionally said incorrect things about dinosaurs to make Kei correct him. And correct him he did, Kei went into full lecture mode. It's rather amazing how much Kei knows.

"Did you get all the sex outta your system?" Tetsurou asks, smirking.

"Not possible," Koutarou says at the same time Keiji says, "Yes."

"Good, because you have entered the no make-out zone. No funny business."

"There will certainly be no 'funny business'," Keiji affirms as he slaps Koutarou's hand away from his waist.

"But Keijiiii!"

"It's okay bro," Tetsurou says, patting his best friend on the shoulder as they enter the kitchen where Kei is sitting at the counter going through his phone. "I'm in the same sex-free boat, we'll get through it together… Which sounds more sexual than I intended."

"Yeah, but dude, your partner isn't—"

They both freeze as their gazes follow Koutarou's out-thrown arm to where Keiji is hugging a very surprised looking Kei from behind. Keiji's face is pressed into Kei's back, between his shoulder blades, as his arms tighten around his skinny chest.

"—hugging Tsukki intimately… Keiji, what the hell?"

"Um… Keiji?" Kei asks when there is no sign of movement and no response after a few seconds.

"This is kind of hot," Koutarou whispers to Tetsurou, once again not whispering at all.

"Dude, no."

Finally Keiji loosens his grips and pulls away from Kei, straightening. His expression is as impassive as ever but when his smoky green eyes meet Tetsurou's there is understanding in them. Tetsurou will never know how Keiji simply knows these things, he's just that observant.

"Keiji you can't just go around hugging other dudes like that! Especially attractive ones," Koutarou complains, going back to obviously faked annoyance. "Are you trying to make me jealous?"

Kei turns to him with a baffled frown. "You kissed me."

"Kei is upset, he needed a hug," Keiji deadpans.

Silence falls between them as they stare at Keiji in disbelief. Tetsurou had trusted that he wouldn't say anything, he thought he knew Keiji well enough to rely on his discretion. Kei's eyes widen as a panicked expression flitters over his carefully maintained mask of indifference. Koutarou frowns at Kei, pondering his boyfriend's words. Tetsurou's worried for a moment, until Koutarou speaks and he realises precisely why Keiji had said it.

"In that case, I give the best hugs!" Koutarou announces proudly, approaching Kei and pinning him in a giant bear hug before he even gathers his senses to fight it. Not that he could. Koutarou is very strong.

"I can't breathe…" Kei wheezes.

"That just means the power of the hug is working!"

Tetsurou notices the small, sly grin on Keiji's face and can't help but chuckle. Kei narrows his eyes on Tetsurou with his this-is-all-your-fault glare.

"Enjoy it, Tsukki," Tetsurou says, smirking.

"You're the worst."

"What were you guys thinking for… dinner?" Akiteru asks, walking into the room and frowning when he sees Koutarou holding Kei. "Oh, hey."

Koutarou scrambles to release Kei. "I wasn't molesting Tsukki!"

Akiteru narrows his eyes, looking very much like Kei. "I didn't think you were… Now I'm a little suspicious though."

"I swear I wasn't, sir!" Koutarou salutes – for God knows what reason – and then frowns. Tetsurou struggling to hold back the laughter that's bubbling at the back of his throat due to his friend's antics. "You look really young to have a son as old as Tsukki."

"Koutarou, I've told you numerous times that Kei lives with his brother," Keiji says, rolling his eyes. "Please excuse him. I'm Keiji Akaashi, it's a pleasure to meet you."

"Wow, you have amazing manners, you're already my favourite," Akiteru says, grinning as returns the handshake Keiji initialised, and surprised that a sixteen year old is shaking his hand.

Tetsurou gasps. "And here I thought I was your favourite!"

"Wait, why don't you live with your parents?" Koutarou asks, scratching his head. Koutarou is from a large family, with four younger siblings and parents that are affectionate and caring, just like he is. It's understandable that this is what he gets caught up on.

Kei's silent, tendons in his jaw twitching and instantly uncomfortable.

"How about Chinese?" Tetsurou blurts, averting Koutarou's attention to food. It works, he grimaces at Tetsurou.

"Bro, you know I don't like Chinese, way too greasy."

"What about… curry? Tsukki?"

"Sounds fine to me."

"I'll order, you guys go put a movie on or something," Akiteru offers, smiling gratefully at Tetsurou.

With a loud hoot Koutarou bolts over to the larger sofa and dives on it, claiming the whole thing. Keiji sits on top of his legs; it doesn't look comfortable, for either of them, but neither adjust their positioning. It leaves Kei and Tetsurou with the other sofa. Kei folds his long legs, one underneath him and the other against his chest. Tetsurou's noticed that he likes to curl himself up, which, with such long limbs, shouldn't be as easy as Kei makes it look, he must be flexible.

"You like dinosaurs, right Tsukki?" Koutarou asks innocently. Kei shoots Tetsurou a glare.

"What? He's my best friend, I tell him pretty much everything."

"Koutarou has an owl collection, posters and figurines, all over his bedroom," Keiji says dryly. "He's obsessed with them. His bedspread, his underwear, his table lamp, his curtains—"

"Keiji! He gets it!" Koutarou grumbles at his boyfriend, who remains unaffected. "Can we watch Jurassic Park? I haven't seen that in forever."

Kei hesitates, a light blush colouring his cheeks. "No… We—I watched them all last night."

Tetsurou and Keiji glance at him, containing their smiles to one corner of their mouth, while Koutarou whines unhappily.

"What other dino movies you got?"

"Um, Tetsu and I watched Dinosaur earlier, so I guess either documentaries, The Good Dinosaur or The Land Before Time movies," Kei answers.

Koutarou's eyes light up and a broad grin spreads across his face. "The Land Before Time! Do you have all of them?"

"No, there are thirteen and I only have the first six."

"Let's do it!" Koutarou cheers, pumping his fists into the air. "I fucking love Cera, she's badass."

"Ducky is my favourite," Keiji adds as Kei navigates through menu systems to get to the first movie.

"Littlefoot—" Tetsurou and Kei say in unison and stop to glance at each other. Tetsurou finishes for both of them, grinning, "Is clearly the best."

"Okay, food is on its way," Akiteru announces, shoving Kei closer to Tetsurou to sit on the sofa. "What are we watching?"

"Land Before Time!" Koutarou hollers loudly as the movie starts.

Akiteru chuckles. "You're a bad influence on your friends Kei."

Kei feels warm, so incredibly warm. He's not all that comfortable, sleeping on an odd angle, which is strange because his bed is usually comfortable. He likes his bed, but it's not usually this lumpy. His body is bad at retaining heat and he usually has to cocoon himself in blankets, but now there is merely a light blanket covering him and he's, somehow, contently warm.

Something moves underneath him. It's a small movement, barely noticeable. Kei frowns as consciousness takes its hold, making him more aware of the steady, rhythmic pounding of a heart under his ear and the arm wrapped around him tightly. His eyes blink open slowly, the sunlight annoyingly bright. He glances down at what he's lying on and squints to make out the ugly zombie cat on Tetsurou's shirt.

In the clarity of the moment, Kei realises that he's not in his bed. Kei realises that he's in the living room, having fallen asleep staying up all night watching movies. Kei realises that he's not alone in the room, not alone on the sofa.

Butterflies flutter in his stomach as he finally registers every inch of contact between him and Tetsurou. Kei's draped over his chest, one leg hitched up on Tetsurou's hip and foot resting between his calves. Tetsurou's holding him, his strong arm around Kei's shoulders, hand firm on his upper arm.

Oh, shit.

Kei freezes, he has no idea how to move away without waking Tetsurou. He's not even sure he wants to move. But he needs to, he's not sure he can handle the awkwardness of accidentally waking up with Tetsurou like this. Though Tetsurou would probably just laugh it off, there is no way Kei could hide his emotional reaction.

Slowly, carefully, Kei lifts his head from Tetsurou's chest and looks up to see his sleep relaxed features; the sharp line of his jaw, the additional mess of his hair, the softness of his lips and the darkness of his eyelashes resting gently against his tan skin. Kei's breath catches and he curls his hand into a fist to stop himself from… It would be so easy, to just lean down and—

That's what friends are for, Tetsurou's voice echoes in his mind, stopping Kei abruptly.

The words had sliced through his flesh like the sharpest knife. The pain was subtle, barely there, but the damage was just as profound, sliding in between his ribs and eviscerating his heart.

Fuck Tetsu, Kei thinks, swallowing hard as he clings onto the feeling of being in Tetsurou's arms. Twice in the last twenty four hours he's been held by him, and never has Kei felt more comfortable and safe, like it's somewhere he belongs. His jaw tenses. Why did I have to fall for you?

A loud snore tears Kei's attention away from Tetsurou's lips and his head whips around to see – through the blur of his unfocused vision – Koutarou and Keiji curled together on the other sofa. Luckily they both still seem to be asleep.

Breathing a sigh of relief, Kei shifts his weight onto his arms and extracts his leg from between Tetsurou's. It's a slow and nerve-wracking process but he manages to get himself free, focussing solely on his movements and not at all on the space he's putting between them. The space he doesn't want to put between them.

Kei retrieves his glasses from the table beside the sofa and sits them on his nose. Tetsurou shifts in his sleep, curling into the back of the sofa where Kei was sleeping mere minutes ago. Kei's generally not one for hope or optimism, but maybe they'll grow even closer. Tetsurou clearly cares about him, and in such a short amount of time, perhaps he does like Kei and just doesn't know it yet. Perhaps he just needs more time to come to terms with it. Tetsurou brought him his favourite cake, spent the day with him, celebrated with him, watched his favourite movies with him, comforted him, cared—

Tetsurou's phone vibrates on the table that Kei's glasses had been on. His eyes automatically move to it as it draws his attention, and unintentionally sees the message. The newest message is from someone named Ana and it reads 'tetsu where ru? im getting lonely without u' kissing face, love heart, kissing face…

The vibration seems to wake Tetsurou and Kei quickly makes to look like he's waking him.

"It's twelve and your phone won't stop buzzing," Kei grumbles, unaffected mask falling into place.

"Good morning to you too, Tsukki," Tetsurou chuckles, his voice sinfully low and gravely with sleep. He stretches for his phone and groans when he sees the message. "I guess I better go."

Kei doesn't respond, unsure that he even can without venom lacing his words. He walks into the kitchen and pours himself a cup of water, not that he really wants it, just for something to do. Tetsurou stretches, his shoulders and back popping and Kei uses the full extent of his control to avert his eyes from the sight.

"You're okay with the lovebirds, yeah?" Tetsurou asks, pulling on his sneakers in the kitchen before running into Kei's bedroom to grab his bag.

"Yep."

Kei walks with Tetsurou to the front door, his hands pushing through his messy black hair like it will make any difference, like it will stop it from sticking up at odd angles. Kei likes it that way, likes it messy, likes the fact that it's so thick it manages to defy gravity. He quickly quashes those thoughts. It doesn't matter what Kei likes. Only what Ana likes. Because that's who Tetsurou wants and who he's going to see.

"I'll see you tomorrow morning Tsukki," Tetsurou says as Kei opens the front door for him. He pats Kei on the shoulder, grinning that casual grin that seems to light his whole face spectacularly. "I'll pick you up at the usual time."

Kei nods, not trusting himself to speak with the lump that's forming in this throat. Tetsurou walks out and away, and all Kei can do is watch him leave when everything inside him is screaming at him to stop Tetsurou.

That's what friends are for.

Hope only leads to disappointment, it's the mantra he lives by and he should know better. They're friends. They'll only ever be friends. Tetsurou will never see him as anything more and they'll never be anything more, no matter how much Kei wants to be. No matter how much Kei loves Tetsurou…

But Kei can't lose him. Doesn't want to lose the warmth of Tetsurou's friendship, the affection, the care, the concern. Doesn't want to stop seeing his smirk and grin; or stop hearing his stupid jokes and dramatics; or stop feeling the weight of his arm draped over Kei's shoulder. No matter how much it hurts, he can't walk away from Tetsurou.

The only option that gives him is to ignore his feelings. To keep them hidden. Kei will bury his love and no one will know and he'll never have to lose Tetsurou.

"Kei?" Akiteru's voice comes from behind him and Kei realises he's been standing at the door staring at nothing. "Are you okay?"

He nods numbly, shutting the door. "I'm fine."

A/N: Okay so this is the end of the first story arc: Falling (For You). The next chapter won't be up for a full month because I need to finish Absurdly Happy. But once that is done I will go straight into writing the second story arc: Desperate (For You). Which will include: training camp, the State Championship and lots and lots of emotional pain ^_^ as well as adorable background boyfriends and important friendships. Most importantly though: KARASUNO~! Lots of fun planned; I do hope you stay along for the ride.

Also, just so everyone knows, I assure you there will be a happy ending, even though it will look super bleak for a while. KuroTsuki happy endings assured in all of my fics, I could never write my precious boys anything else.