Daisuke was alive in his dream.
He was a grown man, fully trained to be a deadly shinobi. His father was standing next to him, grinning at Kakashi. Riku was poised to launch a kunai at him behind her family, her face distorted by hatred. Daisuke raised his arm, and a pack of wolves bounded forward. They watched as the wolves tore at Kakashi's flesh, mutilating him, making him suffer for the crimes he had done…
He lurched upward, barely missing Iruka's head with his own. He gasped for breath, covered in sweat, shaking from the all-too-real dream.
Iruka's angry face softened at the display of emotion in front of him. "Hey," he said quietly. "Are you okay?"
Kakashi shook his head very slowly. He stared up at the younger man, fear plastered all over his face. "Iruka, I can't do this anymore."
Iruka sat down on the bed next to Kakashi. The older shinobi shuffled closer to him, hands trembling, needing to be reassured that he was not a monster for killing them.
"What can't you do anymore?" Iruka inquired softly. He draped his arm over Kakashi's shoulders; he felt his companion needed it.
"Missions. I can't do them."
Iruka sighed. He was afraid this was going to happen. "Kakashi, you didn't know they were your family. No one had told you, and you had no way of knowing that Keiko had survived. It wasn't your fault."
"Yes it was!"
"I thought Keiko convinced you that it wasn't."
"No she didn't."
Iruka stared out the window for a minute, trying to word his next answer correctly.
"Kakashi, just because you killed you cousin's family does not mean you can't do missions. It just means you have to know all the facts before you accept a mission."
Kakashi whimpered and shook his head, clearly not listening t a word he said. Iruka sighed.
"Fine, Kakashi. I have to go back to the Academy. I'll send Keiko over to help you with the kids." He stood up and closed the door behind him quietly, going back to his morning preparations.
He downed the remainder of his coffee, placing the mug in the sink. He grabbed his papers and stuffed them into a bag, then checked to make sure that Itachi and Sasuke were still asleep before leaving the apartment.
Keiko's new apartment was a few minutes' walk from Kakashi's. Iruka slightly changed his walk to the Academy to walk past her building.
Keiko answered the door with a snarl, her face brightening when she saw it was him. "Iruka! What are you doing here?"
Iruka sighed. "Kakashi had a break down this morning. I have to go back to work and won't be home all day, and I don't trust him alone with the kids. Can you stay with him?"
Keiko smiled and nodded. "Sure I can. I love Itachi and Sasuke. I can watch them any time you need."
Iruka smiled gratefully and continued his trek to the Academy.
His classroom seemed impossibly messy this morning. The shinobi who had teaching was obviously not very good at keeping things clean.
He sighed and dropped his things on his desk, bending down to pick papers and writing utensils.
His students had started arriving by the time he was done. They sat down in their seats, openly staring at their teacher. Iruka raised an eyebrow, but otherwise ignored it.
He called the class to attention just as the last students entered the room. One student raised her hand.
"Yes, Sayuri?"
"Iruka-sensei, where were you?" Sayuri asked softly, her black hair hanging loose around her face. Iruka smiled.
"I had to take care of some business."
"What kind of business?" Michio asked. Iruka blinked.
"Michio? What are you doing here? You graduated from the Academy last year!"
Michio smiled. "Daichi-sensei wanted me to ask you how Kakashi is doing."
"Oh." Iruka shook his head. God, he had so many bad memories of Michio in this classroom. And headaches. "He's doing great. His ribs have healed."
Sayuri frowned. "Who's Kakashi?"
"Why were his ribs broken?" another student asked. Iruka glared at Michio; the Genin smiled and walked away. Iruka vowed to have a talk with Daichi.
"Kakashi is a close friend. He just recently adopted two children, and I was helping him get settled in," Iruka answered. He dropped into his chair. This was going to be a long day.
"Why were his ribs broken?"
He groaned and closed his eyes. Yep, his headache had officially arrived. Thank you, Michio.
/\/\
Keiko arrived at Kakashi's apartment ten minutes after Iruka had left. She let herself in and peeked into the boys' room to see if they were awake, then opened Kakashi's door and walked in.
Her cousin was curled up on the bed, hugging a pillow to his chest and trying his hardest to forget that night. She sighed and pulled her hair to the side, out of her face. She sat down next to Kakashi.
"Kakashi," she said softly. He grunted. "You have to forgive yourself."
"I can't," he mumbled into the pillow. Keiko dropped a hand onto his shoulder. He flinched.
"Kakashi, you can do anything. You just have to believe in yourself."
He didn't reply. Keiko sighed and stood up, walking to the door. She hesitated before opening it, going back to the kids.
Unless Kakashi could help himself, they would need serious help.
/\/\
Minato smiled down at Naruto, bouncing him slightly. The baby giggled and grabbed his vest.
Keiko sat across from him with Sasuke. Itachi had been sent to Hana's house for the day, and Keiko had appeared at Minato's office with Sasuke in her arms. She had explained the situation with Kakashi, and now they needed to figure out what to do.
"Keiko," Minato sighed, turning his attention away from his son."I don't think there's anything we can do."
"What do you mean? There has to be something!"
"I think the only solution is to wait for Kakashi to deal with it himself."
"Hokage-sama, you didn't see him this morning. Even Iruka couldn't get through to him," Keiko said desperately. "He hasn't gotten out of bed all day, and he didn't eat anything I gave him."
"And he's been through worse."
Keiko's golden eyes slid from Minato's blue ones to the window, staring out at Konoha. "Yes, Hokage-sama."
Even though the Hokage had said they shouldn't do anything, didn't mean she wasn't going to try.
A/N: I apologize for the long wait! I kept meaning to update this story, but I would forget and then never do it. And you guys still need five reviews before you get a story from me! Review!