Disclaimer: I do not own anything from the amazing world of Harry Potter!

Chapter 27: Realizing

Draco looked up as the door to the bar swung open. He sucked in a breath as he recognized the forms of his two friends hurrying across the room towards the booth where he was hiding.

He had been sitting in that same place for the last eight hours ordering drink after drink from the elderly barman Tom just wallowing in his miseries.

He put his head down in an effort to avoid being seen. His drunk logic decided that maybe if he couldn't see them then they would not be able to see him. No such luck.

"Draco, what are you doing? Where is Gin?" Blaise's voice cut through the dimly lit room and assaulted Draco's tired ears.

Draco sighed and looked up at his friend. He tried very hard to focus on him through the drunken haze he had been working so hard to acquire but without much success. He decided rather than try to talk he would just shrug.

"What did you do now?" Theo coaxed. He did not sound as abrasive as Blaise which had to mean that he was not as mad at him as Blaise already seemed to be.

Despite the possibility of having better luck talking to Theo all Draco could think to do was to gesture rudely at him. He just wanted them to leave him alone so that he could drink himself to death in peace. But no. Here again was yet another example of Blaise and Theo trying to meddle in his life "for his own good." Bullshit.

"Well this is going nowhere." Blaise said exasperatedly after a moment. He whipped out his wand and mildly stunned Draco

When Draco came to he immediately recognized his surroundings. They were in Blaise's apartment not too far from the Leaky Cauldron in Wizarding London. He could tell that he was still drunk but that it was vastly improved from the last time he had been conscious.

"Oh, look who's up." He heard Blaise say from across the room.

He turned his head slightly to look at his friend where he was sitting on the couch and struggled to fight the waves of nausea that were flowing over him. "What's going on?" he coked out.

"I don't know mate. We were kind of hoping you would tell us." Theo chimed in. "All we got was a 'Something happened with Draco and Ginny. Can you and Blaise go find him?' from Hallie about three hours ago."

"So what did you do now?" Blaise butted in harshly. He knew he should be making more of an effort to be gentle with his friend, especially in the state he was in, but he had seen this type of melodramatic act before and was not impressed with Draco's behavior.

"I didn't do anything."

Blaise snorted in disbelief. "Well that is bullshit. Why don't you try again?"

"Ginny and I got in a fight. That's all."

"Because?"

"I might have gotten upset about how she behaved with other males last evening at her gala." He said in a very flippant and posh tone.

"Gotten upset?" Theo questioned. He was very confused as to the way his to friends were behaving. Draco was being very aloof and noncommittal while Blaise was downright accusatory. This was a definite reversal of roles that he was unaccustomed to. It was becoming very apparent to him once again that in the years he had been gone he had missed some very important pieces of his friends' lives.

"Oh yes." Blaise said before Draco even had the opportunity to respond. "You see, I don't know if you would have noticed this back in the days before Draco was a notorious womanizing man about town, better known as a slut, but he was actually somewhat of a jealous prick with all the girls… oh I mean the girl he dated."

"You sound like a woman." Draco said in a bored voice. He was quite obviously trying to sound disinterested.

"And you are a drunk arsehole. Shut up. Anyways, he became very possessive of Ginny and they sometimes fought over the fact that another guy breathed near her or, god forbid, she happened to mention Harry. This particular characteristic of our dear friend is actually what drove Ginny to run away and not speak to him for three years."

"I broke up with her."

"Because she left you. I said shut up."

"Wait I've never heard any of this, what exactly happened to end them the first time?"

"Oh ho, so you've never heard his part of the story? Well relax mate, because gods know this arse won't tell you, but lucky for you I was there as well and would be more than happy to fill you in…"

Draco sat at the Slytherin table in the Great Hall waiting. He was practically the first person to breakfast that morning. On the outside he appeared as he always did bored and disinterested with a carefully trained Malfoy mask perfect installed on his angular face. But on the inside he felt very different. Where no one could see, his emotions were rearing their ugly heads. Worry, dread, anger and most importantly remorse all coursed through him as his eyes remained trained to the large doors at the front of the hall waiting to catch the tell tale flash of red that was so much a part of the woman he loved. But as more and more people began to fill the long tables Draco became more and more concerned.

"What is going on with you, mate?" Blaise whispered breaking Draco's concentration.

Draco had not even realized that his best friend had joined him. "I don't know what you are talking about." he replied what he hoped was cavalierly.

Blaise raised an eyebrow at both the response and the tone. "Oh really? Because you have been fidgeting and tapping your fingers on the table for the last 10 minutes."

"Malfoys don't fidget."

"I know, that's why I'm asking."

He was about to tell Blaise he could go shove it when suddenly Draco caught sight of Luna as she was about to enter the Hall. She was the next best thing.

Draco sprang up from the table and crossed the room in mere seconds to intercept her. "I need to talk to you." He whispered in a strained voice as he grabbed her by the arm and led her away from the other Ravenclaws and back towards the exit.

Luna could not contain her shock. Draco looked perfectly calm but she could tell from the painful grip he had on her arm and the way that his voice even in a whisper had begun to crack that something was very, very wrong. She put up no fight but simple nodded and followed the enigmatic man out of the room.

When they were safely out of earshot of all the eyes that had followed their strange exit though, Luna had no choice but to start to question. This behavior was strange even coming from Draco. "What's going on Draco?"

"I need your help." He said through gritted teeth.

"Alright, alright, calm down. Just tell me what is going on and we will see how we can sort it."

Draco finally stopped and let go of her arm. He spun away from her and ran his fingers violently through his hair. "Ginny and I got into a… well an awful fight last night. She ran away and I haven't seen her since. I need you to go into the girls dorms in Gryffindor Tower and convince her to talk to me."

"Oh Draco, she'll come out eventually."

"No!" He practically screamed. "You don't understand! She's going to leave!"

Luna looked at him perplexed. 'What do you mean? Like she is going to join the Order?"

"Yes!"

Luna's face creased with worry. "Alright. I'll help you."

Blaise was beginning to get a little worried. He had watched the way his best friend had practically dragged his girlfriend out of the room and they still had yet to return. Normally he trusted Draco implicitly but there was something about the gleam in his eyes this morning that had put Blaise on edge.

He had looked like a scared, trapped animal looking for any kind of release. Blaise knew from experience going hunting with his father and grandfather when he was much younger that animals with that look in their eyes would do almost anything to escape. That is what worried Blaise about leaving Luna alone with Draco right now, he had no idea what was wrong or how that would make his volatile best friend react.

Blaise made the decision to make yet another scene to add to the latest piece of gossip and dash out of the hall to follow his best friend and his love.

He emerged just in time to see the pair hurrying up the main staircase in the direction of the towers.

"Wait!" he called out as he ran across the wide open space of the atrium and up the stairs. "What in the bloody hell are you two doing?"

"We're breaking into Gryffindor Tower to check on Ginny because she and Draco got into a rather large fight last evening and now he is afraid that she has run away to join her family and the Order of the Phoenix… not even sure you know what that is but it is beside the point. We need to check on her." Luna said in her matter of fact way that often sent Blaise's head reeling for a few moments trying to catch up with her insanely blatant logic.

This time was no exception. He just took in what she said and nodded. "Alright, lead on."

Draco said nothing in response but immediately began to swiftly move back up the steps.

Minutes later Luna, Blaise and Draco walked up calmly to the portrait of the Fat Lady who was the guardian to Gryffindor Tower.

"Good evening ma'am." Luna said demurely. "I don't know if you remember me but I'm Ginny Weasley's friend and this is Draco Malfoy, the head boy and my boyfriend Blaise. We haven't seen Ginny in some time and we were beginning to get worried about her. Would it be possible for us to get into the common room just to check on her?"

"Of course I remember you darling but I'm not sure how the professors would feel if I just let several other students into a common room that was not their own."

"We completely understand that ma'am and would be more than happy to respect that if we weren't so concerned about Ginny. Did you by any chance see her last night?"

The Fat Lady stared contemplatively for a moment before recognition dawned on her face. "Oh dear! Ms. Weasley was the young lady who woke me up so late last night wasn't she? Came barreling down the hallway with tears streaming down her poor little face. She was absolutely hysterical, could barely get out the password. On second thought I had better let you all in to check on her." She quickly swung forward and Luna called their thanks to her before scooting through the doorway.

As they entered both of the Slytherin men were struck by how bright the room was. Everything was decorated in the tell tale Gryffindor scarlet and gold which stood in sharp contrast to the more soothing deep green and silver of the Slytherin domain.

While Blaise continued to explore the long held 'enemy' territory, Draco quickly refocused himself, only able to think of Ginny. "Alright Looney, can you go up to her dormitory and check? She has to still be up there. Just see if you can coax her to come down and talk to me."

"I still don't know if this is a good idea Draco… but alright." She quickly tripped lightly up the stairs and out of site of the boys.

Draco began to pace again as he had been all night since she had run from his room. He had known then that his words had been far too harsh but he had said what he felt at the particular moment. For that he did not feel bad, but for hurting the woman he loved he felt awful and was now more than ready to grovel to fix what he had broken.

Moments later they heard the sound of footsteps coming back down the stairs. Draco's breath caught in his throat as he watched Luna emerge all alone from the girl's tower.

"She won't come?" he asked, crestfallen.

"Draco…" Luna said in a strained and almost masked tone he had never heard from his friend. "She isn't there love."

Everything drained out of Draco: all his fears, anger and anxiety, and, worst of all, the small amount of hope which he did not even know he was so wholly relying on in that moment. Something inside of him snapped.

The next anyone knew Draco was thrashing around throwing anything he could get his hands on, trying to create as much destruction as he could. For the will to destroy was the only thing that was left in him if she wasn't there. Ginny was everything beautiful and good in his life and without her, without the opportunity to fix everything that had occurred between them, all he could do was lash out at the world around him.

He was blinded by rage. Not noticing the smash of glass objects he would throw or the crack of the wooden furniture he broke. He heard nothing of Luna's shrieks of fright and did not feel Blaise's futile attempts to restrain him.

He was aware of almost nothing but his despair until two more sets of hands stepped into aide Blaise and forced him to the ground. Moments later he lost the last shreds of his consciousness as he was stunned.

Not long after that he woke up in unfamiliar settings. He looked around and discovered that he was in Professor McGonagall's office.

"Well look who is up. Good morning Mr. Malfoy."

Draco did nothing but give her a curt nod.

"How are you feeling? That was quite the little scene you made in the middle of my house's common room. It took the combined strength of Mr. Zabini, Mr. Finnegan and Mr. Thomas to finally control you. Do you care to tell me what came over you?"

"No ma'am. I would prefer not to." He mumbled through gritted teeth.

"Please work with me Draco. This really is grounds for you to be relieved of your position as head boy. I really don't want to have to do that but I will have no choice if you don't at least explain what came over you. You are supposed to be an example for the rest of the school, not a destructive force that threatens them all."

Draco continued to say nothing, his Malfoy mask perfectly in place.

Professor McGonagall sighed and briefly messaged her temples. "I do not know what has gotten into this school. Between you today and the disappearance of Ginny Weasley I just don't know what I am going to do."

At the mention of her name Draco's face contorted in pain. It was only a flash but one that McGonagall's quick eyes did not fail to catch.

Understanding flowed over her. All the professors had noticed how close Draco and Ginny had become. None had suspected that they were anything more than friends, that was a miracle in itself, but maybe there had been something more behind closed doors that had never occurred to the professorial staff.

"Mr. Malfoy," she asked cautiously. "Were you and Ms. Weasley romantically involved?"

Draco said nothing but every muscle in his body visibly wound tighter.

"I see." She said sagely. Instinct told her that things had not ended well and that this boy had to be going through more than enough already without her adding to his misery. Her heart truly did go out to him so she made a decision. "Alright Mr. Malfoy, I'm docking 25 points from Slytherin and you are free to go. Just make sure that we don't have a repeat of this incident in any of the houses.

Draco left feeling nothing. He did not feel the gratitude he knew he should at McGonagall's lenience or the remorse for his behavior. The only thing he felt now was numb. Blaise would call him melodramatic he knew but there was nothing he could do. He felt empty.

And so the days turned into weeks and the weeks turned into months. Nothing much changed from that day. Draco went about the motions of doing his job and attending his classes but he felt nothing. Draco remained a dark hole void of all the emotions and deep seated sarcasm that had always so characterized his personality.

And then one day everything in life changed again.

Draco was sitting calmly at dinner. Blaise, as usual, was seated by his side animatedly caught up in some conversation with Crabbe and Goyle. Draco said nothing. He didn't really talk anymore, it was more that Draco had become Blaise and Luna's silent, sad shadow that none but the two dare to approach.

Draco had barely touched the food that was on his plate. He moved it around on his plate in a bored fashion, unconsciously forming his peas into the one word that would cause him the most pain when he regained his senses.

Suddenly, a jet black owl swooped down through the hall. All the eyes in the room turned to watch it. It was very strange for owls to be delivering mail at this hour. The owl headed straight for the Slytherin table and dropped a small letter right in front of Draco before turning right around and flying off, not even waiting for a treat.

The whole hall stared as Draco picked up the letter and looked at it. Immediately recognizing the small flowery script, he felt his breath catching in his chest. He quickly tucked it into his pocket until he could get somewhere solitary enough to read it.

Blaise gave him an inquisitive look when he finally met his eyes but Draco did nothing but shrug.

A few minutes later, once the general public's interest had waned, Draco stood up and slipped out of the Great Hall without very many people noticing him. He then made his way back down to his room in the Dungeons where he was finally able to read the note that he had been acutely aware of in his pocket.

He stared at his name written in her perfect script on the outside. Ever so slowly he was able to tear his eyes from the writing and flip it over to carefully break the seal that held it closed. He forced himself to read the few short words.

Drae,

I'm sorry I left. I don't know what I was thinking.

I acted rashly and out of anger. Please owl me back,

I want to fix this. I miss you and I love you forever.

Yours always,

Ginny

When he had read it he was overcome by a great and terrible anger that seemed to coarse through him. He was unsure why but her words caused him to fill with a deep seated bitterness that replaced the empty hole in the pit of his soul rather than the great relief he had expected to feel.

He tore the note into a million little pieces than used his magic to burst them into flames.

He flung himself on to his bed and curled up into a little ball. So she wanted to fix things. Well what if he didn't think that things could be fixed? Maybe now it was just too late for them. She had left him and that in itself said more than enough about what she really wanted.

"… And thus Draco's little heart was officially crushed and he was bitter and broken forevermore. The end."

"That is quite intense."

"You over exaggerate everything." Draco said in his most bored tone.

"I did no such thing. That is exactly what happened and exactly how you behaved. You are aware that you deserved for her to leave you correct?"

Draco did nothing but grit his teeth. He could not believe that Blaise would say something like that.

"Don't look at me in that tone, it is true. Ginny never did anything to you. That girl loved you more than anything in the entire world and you ran her off because in the end you were too scared to actually let someone love you."

"You're being ridiculous." Draco whispered.

"He's a bit right Blaise. Maybe you need to calm down." Theo chimed in. it scared him the way the energy in the room was rising in a very negative way.

"No. He needs to hear this. You are my best mate but for too long I have watched you go through an endless string of women searching for something you are never going to find because you found the love of your life years ago. You lost her once but you have been given a remarkable second chance to make things work with Ginny. Do not fuck this up because you are scared of commitment, or not being good enough, or whatever it is that has always held you back from just loving her the way she deserves. You can tell me I 'sound like a woman' all you want but I don't care because I know exactly what it is like to find that one person who so entirely completes you that she actually becomes your reason for living and we both know you have too. Do not let something like petty jealousy or your idiotic pride get in the way of showing her just how much you love her."

Draco could not meet his friend's eyes. It pained him to admit it but he knew that Blaise was right once again. "So what do I do now?"

"You go home and beg her for your forgiveness." Theo told him assuredly. "Beseech her until she takes you back."

"I'm not sure she will. I have messed up too many times."

"Gods know you have," Blaise agreed. "But you have to try anyway."

Draco stood up and nodded. He headed straight to the door without another word.

The door shut behind Draco and then moments later there was a very distinct pop from just outside in the hall way.

Theo and Blaise looked at each other. There really was nothing that the two friends had to say, they both knew from intuition that this was not over for their friends. They collapsed on opposing couches.

"Is the coast clear?" A new voice called out.

Blaise chuckled. "Yes, he's gone. You two can come out."

Luna and Hallie both emerged from down the hallway and flopped into place with their respective men.

"Well I doubt this day could be much worse for them." Hallie said exasperatedly.

Theo sighed and kissed her on the forehead. "I don't know, I think you are seriously underestimating them."

"Did you hear everything he said?" Blaise asked.

Luna nodded. "Yes we were back their listening the whole time. That was quite an inspiring little speech you gave there."

"I did my best."

"What do you think he will do?" Hallie asked.

"Knowing Draco? Probably the exact wrong thing, but I think we scared him enough that he will figure out how to make it all work."

"I really hope so." Luna said almost sadly. "They were so close to being happy there for a minute… there is also something that you boys don't know yet. Ginny is pregnant."

They both started, stunned.

"Come again?" Blaise choked out.

"You heard me correctly. Ginny is having Draco's baby and he doesn't even know yet and he will not know until he finds a way to fix all this because she left him and hasn't told him anything."

"You mean she isn't going to be at the Manor where we just sent him when he gets there?" Theo clarified.

"Nope and no one is to tell him where she is. He needs to put the effort into finding her if he really wants her back." Luna responded matter-of-factly.

"Wow." Theo said.

"Second that." Blaise agreed.

"Ok." Hallie interjected. "Enough about them. Time for the four of us to drink."

"Amen." Conceded Blaise again.

"So four glasses then?" She confirmed taking charge of the situation as she walked towards the kitchen.

"Three," Luna corrected. "I'm not drinking."

"Wow. Why?" Hallie questioned.

"Well that's usually frowned upon when you are pregnant."

Hallie spun around and stared with her mouth open. "What?You too?"

"Well technically me first but yes." Luna said looking at Blaise who's face wore a big stupid grin.

"That is not fair! Now I want one!" Hallie began to whine. "Theo…?"

"No! Absolutely not!" Theo immediately chimed in.

"But Ginny and Luna both get one!"

"If Ginny and Luna both jumped off a bridge would you do it?"

"…. How pretty is the bridge?"

Theo threw up his hands in exasperation. "You're impossible."

"But you love me."

"… Some days."

Hallie began to pout ever so slightly. "You won't let me have a baby and you are not a prince. I don't like you anymore."

"Yes you do…. And we'll see about maybe the next round. You know that they will both have more. And what do you mean I'm not a prince?"

"That is none of your damn business…" she said as stuck out her tongue at him.

Draco stood at the bathroom door contemplating whether or not to knock. They were right; he had been such an idiot, over reacting about absolutely nothing. His friends had helped him to cool his head helped him and realize that. She said she loved him and so he needed to… well get over his fear of commitment and believe her. He took a deep breath and rapped softly a few times on the smooth hard wood. There was not answer.

He knocked again, when no response came yet again he ventured to swing open the door anyway what he saw there threw him into a distress.

The room was a mess. There were random pieces of clothing everywhere; it appeared as if everything had been swept off of her dressing table and shelves with random items that had been missed. It was not the violent mess that he had created next door but instead a frightened hurry that blatantly spelled out flight.

"No." he whispered to himself. This could not be happening. Not again.

At this point he began to panic. He couldn't believe she was gone, no not again. It was not possible that this woman whom he needed in his life more than the air he breathed could have run away from him yet again.

He stumbled back to his own room and there on his bed lay something he had not noticed before, a ripped piece of parchment and right next to it a glittering silver moonstone necklace.

He crossed the room in two strides and delicately picked up Ginny's favorite piece of jewelry. The feeling of dread that had crept into his heart now constricting his chest and making it hard to breathe. He snatched the paper from where it lay. Quickly unfolding it he saw Ginny's tiny neat handwriting and two jagged water stains, tears.

I tried… Goodbye. – G

He crumpled up the scrap and sank to the floor in shock and despair. It was true then, she was gone and with her left all possibility that he would ever be happy again. She was the one, the only one he had ever or would ever love and it was all over.

Yes I am totally and completely awful. Please don't hate me. My life is insane and I just have not had the time to write.

I would love if people reviewed the chapter and let me know what you think!

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