Here To Play

by sarolonde

It's not the first time Kei's liked a boy he can't have, he knows the pain and hopelessness of it, yet there is nothing he can do as he falls hard and fast for Tetsurou. Basketball forces them together but Kei finds himself not wanting to leave the warmth of Tetsurou's friendship, no matter how much it hurts. (3rd gym fic)

16. Thank You

The long, pale fingers laced perfectly between his own seem uncertain and Tetsurou can't really blame Kei. Tetsurou has at least had the night to come to terms with how he feels, but for Kei this is all startlingly brand new. All Tetsurou can do is be here and reassure him that it's real, that what he feels is real. Tetsurou will do anything to make sure Kei is comfortable and happy.

Kei's quiet as they make their way back to his house and Tetsurou gives him the time to reflect. Kei had seemed completely baffled, convinced that Tetsurou would never reciprocate his feelings, and then tremendously relieved when he realised Tetsurou was telling the truth.

Tetsurou had recognised the familiar hint of self-deprecating disbelief that Kei would deserve Tetsurou. But of course Kei deserves the world. Kei deserves to be cared for and adored and looked after. Kei deserves to be happy and if Tetsurou can make Kei happy he'll do exactly that. Kei deserves friends who make him laugh and provide comfort. Kei deserves family who love him and protect him—

Tetsurou stops so suddenly that Kei is jerked to a halt by his arm and frowns back at him with concern.

"Tetsu?"

"Oh no… Oh shit." He gazes up at Kei with wide-eyed panic. "I'm so dead."

Kei clicks his tongue. "I wasn't actually planning on killing you, would kind of defeat the purpose," he assures, squeezing Tetsurou's hand to remind him of 'the purpose,' their new relationship.

"No. Aki! You told him, of course you did," Tetsurou says without accusation, stating simple fact, and Kei winces with realisation. "Oh God, he's going to hate me. He hates me, doesn't he?"

"He doesn't hate you, Tetsurou," Kei huffs, exasperation winning out in all uncertain situations. "You're acting like this is worse than confronting me for forgiveness."

"Trust me, I'm not. You should have seen me last night," Tetsurou says with a rueful laugh but immediately stops as an exceedingly sad expression crosses Kei's beautiful face, an expression that makes Tetsurou's heart hurt. "Sorry."

Kei's eyes flicker down to Tetsurou's injured hand, but he merely shakes his head and says, "It's okay."

"Okay. Okay! I can do this," Tetsurou says, inhaling a deep, bracing breath and continuing towards Kei's house.

"You know you don't have to do this now if you don't want to," Kei says, watching him worriedly.

"No, I really have to. Akiteru is my friend and I have to fix this. Even if he wasn't, he's the most important person in your life. And, whether or not you admit it, his opinion is important to you and therefore important to me."

Silence falls between them but the firm pressure of Kei's hand strengthens Tetsurou's resolve. He never expected to get this far today. He never expected Kei to forgive him and he certainly never expected Kei to accept his feelings, even if they reflect his own. But in doing so, Kei has given him confidence to right his wrongs.

Still, the walk up the path to the Tsukishima house has never felt so short. Suddenly they're at the door and Tetsurou's heart is hammering in his chest. Tetsurou is well-versed in angry Kei, but an angry Akiteru is an unknown entity and Tetsurou could have very happily lived his life without knowing. But he has to.

Kei waits with uncharacteristic patience, giving Tetsurou time to knock on the door himself, even though Kei definitely has his key. His knuckles wrap against the door ever so loudly, the sound making Tetsurou wince. There are footsteps from within and then the door opens.

Clearly Akiteru doesn't expect Kei and he especially doesn't expect Tetsurou. His expression initially friendly and curious shifts to confusion and, upon seeing Tetsurou, his gold eyes narrow with disdain which softens upon seeing their linked hands. When his eyes move back up to Tetsurou's face, he's annoyed. Then, he simply walks away, leaving Tetsurou gaping after him, and he has absolutely no idea how to proceed.

"Your brother doesn't own a gun, does he?" Tetsurou asks, eyes darting warily.

"Fairly certain he's a pacifist," Kei comments with a hint of amusement.

Tetsurou tentatively enters the house and follows Akiteru into the kitchen where he stands waiting with his arms folded over his chest. He's an intimidating figure without his usual good-natured, relaxed expression and carefree smile. God help anyone who crosses the Tsukishima brothers; despite their fair, golden attraction they're actually fairly terrifying. Tetsurou himself feels like praying for help and both of them actually like him. Or, Akiteru certainly used to, he's not so sure anymore.

"You might want to start," Kei whispers to Tetsurou into the awkward silence.

"Er, right," he mumbles and swallows hard, palms sweaty. If he managed to apologise to Kei, and somehow, magically, end up in a relationship with him, Tetsurou can certainly do this. The pressure is immense though. "Okay, Aki, I'm so, extremely sorry. I never meant to hurt Kei, I would never purposely hurt him. I fucked up and made a huge mistake. I don't expect you to forgive me but I care about Kei, I care about him so freaking much."

"You apologised to Kei?" Akiteru questions, voice low and stern.

"Of course. I should never have treated him like that. He deserves so much better."

Akiteru nods and narrows his eyes on their joined hands. "And you—you feel the same way about Kei?"

"Yeah, it just… It took me a while to—to realise."

"And you're together?"

"I hope so…" Tetsurou says, glancing back at Kei for confirmation.

Kei nods and adjusts his grip in Tetsurou's sweaty hand. "Yes."

Heaving a heavy sigh, Akiteru closes his eyes for a moment and when they open again they're burning with protectiveness. "You will never use that word again, or so help me Tetsurou, you will never step another foot in this house."

"Already removed from my vocabulary," Tetsurou confirms earnestly. "I promise. I will do anything to fix this. I will jump any amount hoops you want."

Akiteru huffs and shakes his head. "That won't be necessary."

"Would be amusing though," Kei comments under his breath.

"I'm trusting you Tetsu," Akiteru continues, his expression as serious as his tone. "I'm trusting you to never hurt him again and to protect him."

Kei clicks his tongue and while Tetsurou can't see his face, is fairly sure he just rolled his eyes.

"Of course, I would do anything to protect him," Tetsurou responds.

"Okay."

"Okay."

Letting out a deep breath, Akiteru relaxes his stance and already seems so much more like himself. Still a little on edge, Tetsurou tenses as Akiteru approaches him quickly, but merely pulls him into an extremely surprising hug. Kei huffs a laugh behind him and lets his hand go. Tetsurou returns the hug a little hesitantly.

"Well, now that's sorted and while… this happens, I'm going to have a quick shower," Kei declares and leaves.

When Akiteru finally pulls back his hands remain on Tetsurou's shoulders and he looks gravely concerned. "Are you okay, Tetsu?" he asks.

"Um, a little surprised maybe," Tetsurou mumbles, frowning in confusion.

Akiteru chuckles. "I'm not mad at you. I forgive you, Tetsu. I mean, I was mad, but we all do stupid things, especially when we're scared. I just want to make sure you're okay. You're only young and after going through it with Kei, I understand how difficult and confusing these changes can be."

"Oh…" he breathes, waves of relief crashing over him and utterly, unspeakably touched by Akiteru's concern. "No, I'm oddly comfortable with my sexuality, actually. Because of Kei. It's not so much a revelation of 'I'm attracted to boys and girls', so much as 'I really like Kei'. More than anything I'm just annoyed at myself that it took so long to realise."

A warm smile brightens Akiteru's face. "I'm glad to hear you're okay with it. If you need to talk about anything or need any help telling your parents or anything just let me know, okay?"

"Thanks, Aki—shit, you're going to make me cry," Tetsurou says, pulling Akiteru into another hug.

"That's okay, Tetsu. I've known for quite a while that Kei's liked you and he doesn't trust people easily, he doesn't let just anyone in. You're special and important to Kei and even if I didn't know, first hand, what a good guy you are, that would be enough to convince me that you're trustworthy."

Tetsurou, who usually has a response for everything, has absolutely no idea how to respond. The Tsukishima brothers are truly trying to kill him, just with unbelievable kindness and understanding that is on the verge of leaving him a pathetic mess on the floor. Lacking a response, Tetsurou simply stands there and hugs him. Too grateful for words.

"Okay, before you make me cry, I better go finish some work for tomorrow," Akiteru says, rubbing his hands over his eyes that are glassy with emotion. He walks over to his bedroom door as Kei exits the bathroom, a plume of steam following him. "And please both of you be safe. No sex while I'm here… preferably not here at all."

"Great, so just at Tetsurou's then," Kei comments indifferently as he passes in nothing but a towel.

Tetsurou's eyes widen and he feels his face heat with embarrassment. He's ready to placate Akiteru with an adamant shake of his head but Akiteru merely laughs and closes his bedroom door behind him. Yep, definitely trying to kill him.

Even though Kei's door has been left open invitingly, Tetsurou waits a whole five minutes before he approaches, giving Kei more than enough time to get dressed. They get changed in front of each other all the time in the locker-rooms, Tetsurou has even been in Kei's bedroom when he's changed before, but it feels different now. The thought of just the two of them in there, while Kei is any form of naked, makes his skin tingle in a completely wonderful but, as of yet, inappropriate way.

Tentatively, Tetsurou pokes his head into the doorway to find Kei sitting on his bed pulling thick, black socks on. He's dressed in more soft, warm sweats with the same hoodie, rugged up because it's not exactly warm in their house. Without reservation, Tetsurou kicks his shoes off, climbs up onto the double bed and sits himself down next to Kei, leaning back against the pillows.

Kei's hair is deep gold with dampness at the ends and curling into his neck and forehead softly, Tetsurou's fingers twitch with a need to touch. Technically, he probably can, Kei might let him, but less than a few hours ago he had been certain Kei hated him. So it's probably a little too soon for too much touching.

"Aki didn't lecture you did he?" Kei asks quietly, standing up to close the door before sitting back down next to Tetsurou.

"No, he—he's oddly supportive, considering."

"'Considering', you're ridiculously dramatic, Tetsu."

"And you're ridiculously resilient," Tetsurou says, turning a small, sad smile to Kei. "I hurt you. That's a very big consideration. I really mean it though, I'll do anything to make you feel comfortable and safe with me, Kei."

Finished with his socks, Kei leans back and narrows his eyes at Tetsurou. "You're an asshole. You're not supposed to be all supplicating and apologetic. You're supposed to get all defensive and not talk to me for days and weeks like a normal teenager. You're supposed to give me time to be annoyed at you, time that only makes it worse and makes me more and more upset. Instead, here you are, being far too kind and repentant and mature for me to even consider being annoyed at you."

Tetsurou grins. "Now who's being dramatic?"

"You must be rubbing off on me," Kei mumbles, eyes dropping and stopping himself from smiling by biting his lip.

"So you actually… like me, right?"

"What, my screamed, upset confession wasn't enough," Kei says sarcastically, it's not a question. Tetsurou remains quiet, watching him fiddle with the hem of his hoodie. "I really do like you, Tetsurou. I think I have for—since the beginning."

Tetsurou's chest feels tight, his heart swelling at the softly spoken admission. He reaches out and takes Kei's hand, entwining their fingers in a way that already feels natural and easy. Ever has he envied those elegant hands, with long pale fingers so strong and deft; now he can touch them, hold them between his own, massage and look after them.

"I should have just told you," Kei murmurs. Tetsurou looks up from where he's gazing delightedly at their interlocked fingers.

"You could have, you know?" he responds slowly, carefully. "I mean, even if I didn't feel the same way, you could have. I wouldn't have been angry or anything. It's something I've had to consider before. With Kou; but the day his eyes landed on Keiji I knew that wasn't going to be a problem. And then with you. I would have been okay with it, worked through it."

"Not with Kenma?"

Tetsurou scrunches up his face as his stomach twists uncomfortably at the thought. "My little brother? Bleugh—gross!"

Kei rolls his eyes. "He's not actually related to you. But I see your point."

"Anyway, please don't dwell on what should or shouldn't have happened, especially you, Kei. You did nothing wrong. I, however, did a lot of things I shouldn't have—" Tetsurou grimaces as thoughts of Ana violate his warm, happy bubble. He closes his eyes shut tight and inhales deeply. "I—um—there's something I have to tell you. If it's too much for one day I understand, I will be sure to tell you later. It's nothing overly horrible. I just… don't like secrets."

The last sentence comes out quietly under the intense scrutiny of Kei's gaze and he clicks his tongue in annoyance. "You don't have to walk on eggshells around me, Tetsu. I'm not some fragile flower. I'm not going to break and I'm… I'm not going anywhere," he says resolutely, giving Tetsurou's hand an affirming squeeze.

Tetsurou's unable to stop himself smiling at that and then he grimaces again. "Okay—um, fuck," he mutters, shoving the fingers of his free hand through his hair in frustration. "Just let me get to the end before—you know—"

"Not going anywhere."

"Right. The night you kissed me, I was… I don't even know. A mess. A confused mess who makes terrible decisions. I went over to Ana's—"

Kei stiffens.

"Nothing happened!" he reassures immediately and continuing quickly. "We were in my car, she kissed me, she was all over me. But all I could think about was you. Which… sounds…" Tetsurou sighs, not even sure how to finish that sentence. "Just—all I could think about was you and wishing it was you. So I told Ana to stop, she was… persistent, but eventually she got out of the car and I went home and…"

Feeling his face heat with the memory of touching himself thinking about Kei, Kei's mouth, Kei blowing him, Tetsurou ducks his head.

"And?" Kei prompts, his eyebrows raised.

"I jerked off thinking about you," Tetsurou mumbles under his breath, hoping Kei won't hear him. Which is dumb considering how quiet it is and how close they are. Feeling increasingly uncomfortable in the silence, Tetsurou glances up to see Kei hiding a smile behind his hand and finally a snicker escapes. "You're laughing at me?"

Kei shakes his head, collecting himself. "No. Sorry. It's been… an interesting weekend."

Tetsurou sighs deeply and rests his head back against the wall. "That's one word for it. Another is 'exhausting.' Let's not fight again, Tsukki. I hate it. All I wanted to do was go to you, to talk to you… Ironic, I guess."

Kei hums in agreement and comfortable silence falls between them. They've always had comfortable silences, even though Tetsurou likes to ramble and draw as many interesting expressions and reactions from Kei as possible and even though he loves listening to the calm tone of Kei's voice. In fact, the more time he spends with Kei after the revelation of how much he likes him, Tetsurou is finding more and more things that he adores about Kei. Things he always adored but only now has the feelings to understand why.

Cold fingers carefully probe the back of Tetsurou's hand, sliding gently across his knuckles. Tilting his head, Tetsurou watches guilt crease Kei's face as he inspects his injured hand. He's about to say something when amusement curls Kei's mouth.

"You didn't hit Ana did you?" Kei questions, the expression on his face an intriguing combination of hopeful and worried.

Tetsurou snorts a laugh but shakes his head. "No. Closet door. And it's not your fault either," he adds. "I was angry at myself for how I treated you. It was stupid…"

"Don't do it again, Tetsu."

He nods solemnly. He certainly won't, he was lucky, this time. "Yes, boss," Tetsurou says, grin spreading wide. Kei watches him in that intense way that makes Tetsurou's muscles tense with nervous energy and his heart-rate speed up expectantly.

Kei's eyes flicker down to Tetsurou's mouth and his breath catches in his throat. As much as he wants to he can't move; he doesn't want to push Kei, not today, not so soon. Everything inside him is screaming at him to move forward, to kiss Kei and fix the mess he made of their first kiss. Which, in hindsight, had been soft and sweet and amazing despite the shock.

The bed moves and Tetsurou blinks to find Kei much closer, his enchanting golden eyes searching. It's a question, seeking permission. The answer is irrefutably, yes. Tetsurou leans in slowly, his mouth falling open as his gaze drops to the irresistible curve of Kei's bottom lip. Too focused on each other's mouths, their noses bump and Tetsurou smiles as he tilts his head to fix the angle.

Their lips barely brush and it sends an affecting jolt of delicious heat down his spine, his heart stuttering in his chest. It's incredible, just this and Tetsurou feels like he's floating, his skin tingling and mind so completely focussed on Kei. Tetsurou closes his eyes as Kei gives in, pressing a languid kiss to his lips. There are no fireworks or sparks, but Tetsurou feels like he's melting; the tender, lingering kiss a level of blissful comfort he'd never even imagined could exist.

A bone-deep warmth of relief floods him, and Tetsurou just knows; this is exactly where he's supposed to be.

Kei parts his lips, to place another soft kiss, and another, before moving back unhurriedly, hot breath ghosting Tetsurou's skin. Tetsurou opens his eyes to find Kei staring at his mouth, his teeth biting wistfully into his bottom lip before his gaze flickers up to meet Tetsurou's. A slow, tentative smile stretches Kei's lips and Tetsurou grins unreservedly in return.

There is a loud knock at the door.

"Are you making out?" Akiteru asks through the door.

Kei clicks his tongue. "He's going to do this every time now," he mutters to Tetsurou before turning away and calling out, "Come in."

The door opens to reveal Akiteru, who is covering his eyes. Tetsurou chuckles and Kei sighs.

"You didn't answer the question," Akiteru says innocently.

"No, we aren't making out."

"Oh good," Akiteru says, lowering his hand and smiling brightly, clearly enjoying annoying his little brother. "Lunch anyone? I'm starving."

Tetsurou glances down at his watch. 12:32pm. "Shit, I have to go."

"Sunday roast," Kei predicts. Tetsurou glances up, eyebrows raised in surprise that he remembers; it probably shouldn't be a surprise but it feels nice. "Tetsu has a big fancy Sunday roast lunch with his parents to catch up with each other because they're all so busy," he continues to explain to Akiteru.

Tetsurou scrambles up from the bed and pulls his sneakers on. At Kei's words realisation hits him; this is the best chance he's going to have to tell his parents. His stomach starts to tie itself in nervous knots as he straightens and Tetsurou freezes, staring at the ground.

"I should… I'm going to have to tell them," he murmurs to himself. But of course they both hear.

"Are you sure you don't need my help?" Akiteru offers immediately.

"No, I'm… I think I'll be okay. I've never heard either of them say anything negative about sexuality and I've always been really close with mom," Tetsurou explains. He doesn't have to be facing Kei to know the pained expression lining his face.

"I'm going with you," Kei says, his voice doesn't waver but there is a stiffness in it. Akiteru winces, worried gaze flickering to his brother.

Tetsurou turns back to him and shakes his head adamantly. "No, Kei. No," he says firmly. Not matter how strong Kei is, this is one thing Tetsurou will protect him from. Even if he thinks it will be okay. Even if Kei complains. Tetsurou refuses to put him through this. He takes Kei's hand. "It'll be fine, Kei. I'll be fine. I promise."

Kei purses his lips and sets his jaw, his chest rising and falling more quickly. Tetsurou can almost see the internal conflict. Lowering his gaze, Kei nods. Without a word he pulls Tetsurou out of his room and towards the front door.

"Eager to get rid of me," Tetsurou jokes in an attempt to lighten the mood.

The door is pulled open and Tetsurou is on his way out of it when Kei pulls him back into a fierce embrace. He holds Tetsurou tightly, close, his fingers gripping into his hoodie and in the back of his thick, black hair. Tetsurou's surprise morphs quickly to affection, returning the hug just as firmly.

"If anything happens come back here," Kei says sternly.

"I will."

"And call me as soon as it's done."

"Okay."

Letting out a shaky breath, Kei steps back. When Tetsurou meets his gaze he feels like he can't breathe. There is so much fear and concern in his beautiful golden eyes that Tetsurou feels his heart clench, overwhelmed with the need to protect Kei. Overwhelmed with gratitude that this amazing boy cares about him. Overwhelmed with happiness that this breath-taking boy is in his life, so wonderfully unguarded and trusting, just for Tetsurou.

"Thank you, Kei," Tetsurou whispers before backing out the door. He smiles brightly at Kei, at his boyfriend. "I'll see you tomorrow morning."

---

Tetsurou has been standing before his front door for the last five minutes, in which he has gone through ten different scenarios of how his 'coming out' will go. Everything from accepting hugs to objects being thrown. Oh how he hopes objects will not be thrown.

Nervousness and fear doesn't make Tetsurou reserved and sombre as it does most people. Instead, it makes him jittery and skittish. His thoughts process a million a minute – as opposed to the usual thousand – and he fidgets; clenching and unclenching hands, jostling his leg and his hair has never, ever been this messy from all the times he's pushed his fingers through it this weekend.

As much as he doubts his parents will be disapproving, Tetsurou is extremely nervous. There is always that niggling thought in the back of his mind asking 'What if they hate me?' And of course his mind always goes back to Kei, how his parents had betrayed him. Kei hadn't thought his parents capable of that either.

On that demoralising note, Tetsurou heaves a deep breath and unlocks the door. As he walks in and shucks his shoes off at the door, he can hear his mother moving around the kitchen, pots clanking and cutlery clinking.

His mother looks up as he enters the kitchen, offering her usual bright smile.

"Hi honey, everything all right?" Maiko asks, straightening from the dishwasher. "You left in a hurry this morning, said something about fixing something?"

"Um, yeah, all fixed, mom," he answers distractedly. Despite all the time he spent planning he's floundering for a way to start.

She narrows her eyes on him, dark eyes filled with concern, and comes around the counter to smooth his hair down. "Are you sure you're all right?"

"When's lunch ready?" he asks, stalling.

"Hmm, probably thirty or so minutes. You're father and I had a later breakfast so I got started a bit later than usual. Have you eaten today?"

Tetsurou shakes his head, no.

"That's not like you… Tetsu, honey, you're worrying me. What's wrong?"

He closes his eyes, savouring the feel of her hand in his hair while he still can. Heaving a steeling breath, Tetsurou meets her gaze levelly. "I need to talk to you and dad. Do you—Do you have time now?"

"Of course," she says, smiling warmly. "Sit down and I'll go get your father."

Tetsurou obediently takes his usual seat at the breakfast table as Maiko leaves the room. Tetsurou clutches his hands together in his lap, closing his eyes and imagining it's Kei's hand he's holding. He forces himself not to think about what he's doing or what he's going to say. He thinks about Kei; playing basketball with Kei, watching movies with Kei, holding Kei, cuddling up to Kei.

It's been a long, emotionally exhausting day, but he needs to do this. To be with Kei he needs to do this. No matter the outcome, nothing will keep him from Kei.

"Tetsu?" He looks up from his hands to see his parents sitting in their usual places, watching him expectantly, concerned. "You wanted to talk to us, son?" Takeru asks.

"Um, yeah. I've had a difficult weekend—" he snorts a self-depreciating laugh, "so, I'm just going to say it. I am—er—I'm bisexual. That is, I'm attracted to boys and girls. N-Not that I'm going around hitting on anything that moves, or anything. Just, um, one boy. Who—Who made me realise that I'm attracted to both. B-But just him. For now. Or, ever, I hope…" Tetsurou verifies, glancing between his parents, his hands trembling and heart racing as he waits for a reaction.

They're both staring at him, frowning, possibly because of his rambling more than anything. At least, he hopes that's why. Takeru turns his gaze to Maiko. His father has never been the most emotionally connected person, so Tetsurou turns to her also. Her puzzled expression softens and Maiko smiles brightly at Tetsurou, a knowing twinkle in her eye.

"Is it Kei?" she asks hopefully.

Tetsurou's eyes widen and his jaw drops open. He tries to speak but no words come out, his jaw clicking shut. He glances at his father but merely finds the same curious expression. This is not one of the ten expected reaction scenarios; he has absolutely no idea how to react to this.

"I—What?" Tetsurou finally gets out, the carpet pulled from underneath him for the umpteenth time this weekend. He should really stop having expectations all together at this point. "H-How? What?"

"Of course we don't mind about your sexual orientation, honey. If a boy makes you happy then we're happy for you," Maiko says simply and turns to his father, her sincere expression never faltering. "Right Takeru?"

Takeru nods sternly, his brow creased as if wondering why this is even a question. "Tetsurou, you are by far the most responsible and self-sufficient young man I could have ever had the honour of calling my son. We only ever want the best for you. We only ever want you to do what makes you happy."

Tetsurou swallows hard against the lump in his throat. Takeru said it matter-of-factly and there is no doubt in Tetsurou's mind that he means every word.

"Thanks dad," he croaks out.

"Now," Takeru says, rising from his seat. "I have an important call to make, but we'll talk about this more at lunch."

Maiko rises too, but only to walk around Tetsurou's side of the table to pull him into a hug. It's awkward with how short she is and how he has to bend down, but Tetsurou never really cares, especially not now. He doesn't know what he's done to deserve all these amazing people in his life who love him unconditionally and forgive him wholeheartedly, but he couldn't be more appreciative.

"We love you so much, Tetsurou. Never forget that," she whispers, voice earnest and full of emotion.

Tetsurou feels hot tears prickling in his eyes and he pulls the back of his hand across them, wiping them away before they fall. "I love you too, mom. Thank you."

Maiko pulls away and settles back, smiling up at him as she carefully wipes at her eyes. "Okay, now, I'm going to make tea and we're going to talk about Kei."

He chuckles as she makes her way into the kitchen, turning the kettle on. "Why are you so sure it's Kei?"

"Oh, honey," she says with playful condescension. "You never stop talking about him and I tend to agree, Kei seems like a lovely young man. Also I've seen the way you look at him."

"You meet him once and a month ago."

Maiko's eyebrows raise. "You only just realised recently? Wait… Is that what you were doing this morning? I do hope you 'fixed it' and that means you're together now. He is your boyfriend, right? Tell me everything, Tetsu. The whole story."

"You sound like a gossiping teenager," Tetsurou comments, smiling unreservedly as he leans against the bench and watches her make tea. "I'm not sure I can tell you everything…"

"Why? Does it involve sex?"

"No, mom, Jesus," he groans, not embarrassed because she's always been very upfront about sex, but frustrated she would think he would be that kind of guy. Despite the ridiculous rumours at school, intimacy is important to Tetsurou and not something to take lightly. "We literally just got together. There has been no sex of any kind. I really, really like him. In the long-term, going-to-make-this-last kind of way. This is—he's important."

She smiles. "I know, honey. I can tell. You know sex with a boy is very different though? You'll have to do some research and be very careful. If you need to discuss anything, just ask."

"Yes mom, I know," he says, blushing this time. Talking to his mother about sex has always been marginally uncomfortable but since it was always an abstract idea it was fine. Talking to his mother about having sex with Kei on the other hand… Thinking about having sex with Kei in general leads to his blood not knowing whether to rush to his face or his groin.

"Okay then, why can't you tell me?"

"Because I haven't been the best person or friend recently. I was kind of an asshole to Kei."

"Did he forgive you?"

Tetsurou nods, glancing down at his hands. "Yeah… He shouldn't have."

Maiko sighs. "Tetsurou Kuroo, you've always been far too harsh on yourself. Held yourself to impossible standards that you don't even expect of others. People make mistakes, my love, even you. Whatever you did, whatever the two of you have been through, happiness takes a lot of work and I've never known you to shy away from hard work," she says, handing him his cup of tea. "I'm your mother, if Kei can forgive you then I certainly will. So, tell me."

Despite the unflattering story he's about to tell, sure to be accompanied by sighs and scolding, Tetsurou feels a sense of relief and contentment wash over him. His parents accept him, love him, support him and his mother will forgive him.

"Okay, fine. But we need to be sitting for this."

[12:54] me
all good tsukki, they took it really well, ill call u later, mom wants to talk abt "boys", aka you

[12:54] tsukki
I'm really glad Tetsu. I look forward to it.

---

The words of the heavy textbook before Kei seem to get smaller and hazier the longer he reads, the more that infuriating tapping sound and that quaking jiggling disrupt his thoughts. Gritting his teeth, Kei attempts to read the paragraph again.

The library at Nekodani is large, filled with any and all texts one could possibly need. It's a quiet retreat and Kei often spends time here studying. With his last period of the day being a spare, Kei is studying for his Civil War essay due next week. He's reading about the less renowned battles, the smoke and daggers aspects; ambushes, stolen rations and late-night skirmishes. The devious, immoral parts no one likes to discuss as it lacks 'honour.' Although, which part of war is supposed to be honourable, he doesn't know.

He doesn't even finish the second sentence before being torn from his quiet study bubble by the obnoxious pen-tapping and jarring foot tapping of the person sitting at the desk across from him. Heaving a patience fuelling sigh, Kei glances up at the bowed blonde-braided head.

"Will you stop that," he snaps softly. About as patient as he gets. "The tremors are going to make people panic about an earthquake."

Hitoka colours, her foot and hand immediately stopping. "S-Sorry Kei."

"Everything will be fine. Just focus on studying."

His words may seem harsh but it's not the first time he's had to reassure her, nor the second, nor the third, but the sixth, in the last hour. Hitoka has been jittery and jumpy all day. Generally welcoming her focussed and supportive study companionship, but sometimes she can be a nightmare. Not that it happens often. Today is a special occasion, after all.

Nodding sternly, Hitoka sets her soft features into a determined expression and hunches back over her work. This is not the first time she has endeavoured to concentrate on her work either, so Kei gets back to his warily. He glances up every now and then, watching the tension slowly working its back into her shoulders and her hand start to twitch.

Not five minutes after the warning her pen is tapping loudly against her book again.

Kei is about to snap at her again when he hears someone approach and a warm hand touches his shoulder briefly before the person slumps down in the chair next to his. All too familiar with the warm presence and the pleasant tingle at the touch, Kei glances up to see the gorgeous, grinning face of Tetsurou. Despite knowing who it was and that he would be here, Kei's heart flutters at the sight of him.

"Hey, sorry I'm late. Jamieson wanted to discuss the freakin' Bio project, again," Tetsurou says, drawing books out of his bag before putting it on the ground and settling himself in his chair. Kei's grip on his pen tightens as Tetsurou pulls his chair as close as he can and pushes the length of his thigh against Kei's. He smiles at Kei before glancing at Hitoka and frowning. "Yo, Sparkles, what's up? You're eyes are all boggle-y and… Are you sweating?"

"I-I'm okay. Just a little—um—you know—"

Kei groans and drops his head on the desk with a heavy thud. It hurts, but it's worth it. Hitoka squeaks at the loud sound and Tetsurou chuckles, playfully jostling Kei's knee with his own.

"So dramatic, Tsukki," Tetsurou says, his voice full of affection.

"She's been like this all fucking day," Kei complains, lifting his head to glare at Hitoka and Tetsurou in turn. "Apparently I've been the one delegated to deal with her, which is a vast overestimation of my patience."

"Don't talk about the lovely lady like she's not here," Tetsurou admonishes, with levity and barely keeping the grin from his face. Kei senses the activation of dad mode and rolls his eyes.

"You deal with her then, she's being ridiculous."

"I shall. Sparkles, my dear, what seems to be the problem?"

"I—well—I'm just concerned. Wh-What if Tadashi doesn't like the party? I mean, he's not exactly the party type. He's shy and gets nervous around groups of people. Especially if those people are all focussed on him. Oh no… he's going to hate it. I just know he is," Hitoka laments, gnawing viciously, subconsciously, on her pen.

"Oh my adorable little friend," Tetsurou says with playful condescension. "Tadashi is going to love his party, do you know why?"

"Clearly not, she just told you all the reasons he won't," Kei mutters, but they both ignore him and Hitoka shakes her head, eyes wide and worried.

"Because you organised it for him. Because you put in the time and effort for him. And remember, I've been alongside you the whole time, I know exactly how much work you put into this, Sparkles. Freckles will love it, just like he loves you."

Hitoka was actually looking calmer until that final statement, in which her eyes bulge and she makes a sound like a strangled bird. "We haven't—I mean, I don't think he—I'm not sure that he—"

"Of course he loves you." Tetsurou shrugs off her uncertainty. "Just because he hasn't said it yet doesn't mean he doesn't. You'll both say it when you're ready. And that's okay."

The words make Kei hold his breath as he forcibly keeps his head down over his textbook, not daring to glance up for fear of giving himself away. There is no doubt in his mind about how he feels about Tetsurou, but it's far too early in their relationship for disclosing such things. And, like Tetsurou said, it's okay to wait until they're both ready.

Hitoka sighs, seeming to relax if her lack of fidgeting is anything to go by. Thank goodness for Tetsurou, Kei is certainly not competent enough to be dealing with these issues. He can barely handle his own feelings.

"Team Dad strikes again," Kei mumbles under his breath, a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth.

Tetsurou bumps into his shoulder. "I heard that, smartass."

"Oh God, now you really do sound like a dad, please stop."

"You can call me 'daddy' if you like, Tsukki," Tetsurou whispers, his breath hot against Kei's neck and sending an inappropriate shiver down his spine. With a grimace he glares up at a mischievously beaming Tetsurou.

"Never say that again."

Tetsurou just grins at him – that stupid, beautifully bright grin Kei desperately wants to kiss off his infuriatingly attractively face – and he can't stop his own answering smile. Just looking at Tetsurou makes him want to smile. It's as unnerving as it is wonderful.

A half-smothered giggle draws Kei's attention reluctantly away from Tetsurou and he turns to see Hitoka smiling knowingly at them.

"You guys are adorable," Hitoka remarks, her smile so bright it seems like she could pass out with the intensity of it.

Kei bristles, ducking his head back over his work. Tetsurou presses his thigh more firmly against Kei's, a silent agreement with Hitoka, as well as an affectionate reminder of his presence. As if Kei could forget. As if Kei could suddenly ignore the body naturally radiating warmth beside him. As if Kei could ever stop the keen heat of his longing and desire and affection whenever Tetsurou is near.

"Okay. We should probably get some work done before Tsukki bites our heads off."

The three of them, probably the most studious of their friends, put their heads down and get their study done without further interruption. Kei was worried about how he and Tetsurou would study together while in a relationship. He shouldn't have been though, they're both dedicated to their studies and they fall into their accustomed, cooperative and enjoyable study rhythm with ease.

"After the game Saturday you're coming home with me, right?" Tetsurou asks Kei as they're packing up, his voice low with secrecy.

Kei swivels in his chair, his knee coming to rest between Tetsurou's, where he's turned to talk to Kei and distracting him momentarily. Because the accidental implication in the question's phrasing isn't distracting enough. Swallowing hard, Kei forces himself to look up and nod.

"Great, we'll have our first-real-date that afternoon and then the dreaded lunch-with-parents the next day. Although, my parents aren't going to be home until Sunday morning, so at least there is that small reprieve. We'll have Saturday all to ourselves."

All of this is said matter-of-factly, innocently. A word Kei never thought he'd associate with Tetsurou. He knows all the insinuations of Tetsurou's words are unintentional. Firstly, because if they weren't Tetsurou would be either snickering immaturely or emphasising with a wink. Secondly, because for the first four days they've been together, Tetsurou has been avoiding any untoward contact. At least Kei thinks he is. Since their first real kiss on Kei's bed there has been nothing but careful, subtle touches, surreptitious hand holding and affectionate smiles. They've both been busy with school and basketball, but the more days that pass without the heat of Tetsurou's mouth, the more Kei worries that something's wrong.

"First date?" Hitoka asks, her button nose scrunched in confusion. "You haven't had your first date yet?"

Kei glances around at her words, but their preferred study table is fairly secluded and most of the other students have already left. Kei and Tetsurou have agreed to take it slow, especially on the public scale. Their closest friends and families know, but that's all.

"We only got together Sunday, Sparkles," Tetsurou defends. "Four days."

"Oh," she breathes, looking genuinely confused and then huffing a laugh. "Feels like you two have been together for ages."

It's a harmless comment but Kei feels Tetsurou tense beside him and glances over to see his brow furrowed heavily with the unspoken guilt of 'it should have happened sooner.' Without a second thought, Kei places his hand on Tetsurou's knee and squeezes. Tetsurou's expression softens as soon as he meets Kei's gaze.

Kei wishes Tetsurou would stop blaming himself. He hates seeing those glimpses of pain and self-loathing in his dark eyes.

"C'mon Sparkles, let's get this birthday party for your boyfriend set up," Tetsurou says as they make their way out of the library.

Kei groans at the immediate fretful expression that widens Hitoka's eyes. "Fuck sakes. Why did you have to bring it up?" he questions irritably.

As they make their way over to the gym, Tetsurou and Hitoka rehash their plans for Tadashi's party, which is to take place after basketball practice. It's not quite as intricate and personal as Tadashi's present for Hitoka, but there has been a lot of work that's gone into this. For one, asking Keishin for permission; though Kei's fairly certain that there is little their grumpy Coach would deny her. Hitoka explained that she bought Tadashi a gift as well. And when she refused to reveal the mystery gift, Tetsurou teased her about it being 'intimate' until she was bright red and flustered and Kei was certain his boyfriend would be murdered.

Kei is a key part of distracting his Tadashi before the party and Hitoka asks – for the tenth time – if he understands his role. Restraining an eye roll, Kei voices his affirmation with a simple 'yes'.

Tetsurou remains close by his side as they walk. Kei, of course, refuses to slow his pace and much to his amusement and delight, Tetsurou doesn't slow either. Which, considering he's attempting to maintain a conversation with Hitoka, means she's forced into a hasty scurry to keep up with their long legged gaits.

Tetsurou's knuckles brush against the back of his hand, making Kei's heart-rate speed up. He's uncertain whether Tetsurou does it on purpose, but it successfully wipes the smug expression from Kei's face and instead of internally snickering, he's internally reminding himself of why he can't thread his fingers through Tetsurou's.

Five minutes before the end of training, Hitoka sends Kei a not-so-subtle look and Tetsurou sends him away with a slap on the ass under the guise of sporting camaraderie. It's surprising, but welcomed, and settles some of Kei's no-kissing worry. It does the complete opposite to his heart though and he's grateful for the training exhausted redness of his face to cover his blush.

"Tadashi, can you come spot me for some weight lifting and bench-presses?" Kei asks casually.

Too smart for his own good, Tadashi frowns. "Your training regime doesn't have any bench-presses today."

"It's new," Keishin blurts from beside him before Kei can respond. "Need to get some more muscle on those weedy twigs Kei calls arms," he chuckles excessively to cover his lie, squeezing Kei's arm awkwardly. Kei frowns exasperatedly and can see Tetsurou face-palm in his periphery.

"Oh, okay!" Tadashi says, swallowing Keishin's lie whole, and Kei reconsiders the 'smart' thought.

Worried as he is for his friend's blind trust in his mentor, Kei is just grateful he's successful in getting Tadashi away from the courts and into the quiet weight room. He's fairly good at improvising, but he's too tired and grumpy and doesn't trust his ability to keep the secret after Hitoka's been driving him crazy all day.

Kei takes the ridiculous amount of weights off the bar, scowling and grumbling at the bulky gorilla of a boy who left them there – really, there can only be one meat-head who can lift that much, Koutarou. Settling the correct weight on the bar, Kei lays back on the bench and looks up into dark eyes surrounded by a sea of freckles.

"So," Tadashi starts and Kei immediately feels the need to run because nothing good can follow that inquiring tone. "How are things with Tetsu?"

He doesn't answer until a pleasantly familiar burn heats his muscles after fifteen repetitions. "It's fine. I told you already—we're just taking it slow."

Tadashi hesitates, Kei can hear it in the low intake of breath that signals an aborted statement or question.

When Kei had explained Sunday's events, the day he and Tetsurou got together, of everyone Tadashi had been the most unsure. Upon Tetsurou apologising to Tadashi himself, however, hearing about it is worlds different from experiencing Tetsurou's remorse and sincerity and guilt. Still, in the few short days, Tadashi has been questioning and curious.

Kei understands his friend's worry and appreciates it, but there will be things he and Tetsurou will have to resolve themselves. He supposes discussing it with a third party can't hurt.

"You don't seem 'fine,'" Tadashi mumbles.

"You're right. I hate the word 'fine.' What does it even mean," Kei grunts, breathing heavily, eyes focussed on the bar. Pushing up and down. "Nothing's wrong—just—it's going to take time. Frustrating amounts of time, it seems."

Tadashi snorts an uncharacteristic laugh. "Neither of you seem like you need 'time.' Honestly I can't believe I didn't see it before, but now that I know, Tetsu's, like, drawn to you. He always goes to you and watches you, and I figured it was because you're important to the team, and basketball has always been the most important thing to him, but not anymore. I think you are, Tsukki. I think you're the most important thing to Tetsu and I think you have been for a while. And then, of course you've been pining for him for weeks and months. I don't know why either of you would need more time. I mean, Tetsu's not exactly the hesitant, shy type and you're—y-you know—not s-scared to have—um… what you want."

Setting the bar down, Kei straightens slowly and turns to face a brightly blushing Tadashi. Kei raises a single eyebrow and the corner of his mouth twitches with amusement.

"Well then, shall I go have my way with Tetsu now? Shove him against the locker and—"

"Tsukki!" Tadashi admonishes, the colour of his face deepening, if possible. "This is exactly what I mean though. You're n-not a… a…"

"Prude?"

"R-Right, a prude. You and Koushi were—well, you know—"

"Fooling around."

"—for quite a while, and you don't—that stuff doesn't make you nervous or anything."

"Tetsurou makes me nervous," Kei confesses unintentionally, all humour at Tadashi's stuttering embarrassment fading as his gut twists. He drops his gaze. "He's new to this Tadashi, he only just accepted that he's attracted to boys. I don't want to scare him."

"Then maybe you shouldn't go straight for the butt," Tadashi jokes with uncharacteristic boldness. Proving, yet again, that he spends too much time with Tetsurou; the words practically straight from Tetsurou's mouth, except for the innocent use of 'butt.'

Kei rolls his eyes and lays back down on the bench. "I don't want to hear that from you," he mutters. "Forty more, then we're done."

The second set is much harder, so Tadashi is left to a one-sided conversation about training regimes and drills and strategies. It's nothing new thing between them – or between Kei and any of his more talkative friends – and Tadashi does so easily.

Dawdling in the weights room, making a show of stretching and wiping away sweat, Kei stalls for a few minutes, to give Hitoka the whole ten minutes he promised. Tadashi, trusting and oblivious, doesn't seem to notice anything thankfully. Even as Kei leads him away from the courts and gym and up to the empty pavilion above the courts. Even when Kei says "I'm sorry," before opening the door. He doesn't even seem to understand what's happening as the loud "Surprise!" deafens them.

Kei clicks his tongue and pulls a stunned, open-mouthed, wide-eyed Tadashi into the room to receive his birthday wishes from the team. Hitoka approaches him, blushing and still looking ridiculously nervous. Her presence seems to bring Tadashi to his senses.

"Do you like it?" she asks anxiously.

"I… Are you kidding?" Tadashi grins brightly down at her. "I love it, thank you!"

Tadashi lifts her into his arms and spins her around, the sappy, affectionate embrace leaving Kei feeling a strange combination of discomfort and wistfulness.

And then he feels it, the warmth and weight of Tetsurou's gaze. Kei's eyes are immediately drawn to unruly, black hair and a mischievous, bright smile, a smile of unrestrained happiness and affection that's reserved for Kei alone. A smile that pulls Kei's heart up into his throat, threatening to fall from his mouth and burn in his eyes. A smile that obliterates any sense of worry Kei ever felt about Tetsurou and their relationship. A smile that makes Kei believe that maybe Tetsurou loves him in return.

Kei can only smile back, because with a smile Tetsurou has rendered him incapable of doing anything else.

---

"You can't be serious."

"I'm always serious, Kei."

"Tetsurou, you made the worst joke I have ever heard not two minutes ago."

He chuckles. "Oh yeah. That was funny."

Kei clicks his tongue irritably, mostly to stop himself from responding to the absurd statement because it'll get him nowhere. He picks up a wrapped sandwich – fancy and nutritious, as per Tetsurou's standards – and fiddles with the zip-lock seal to distract himself from the fact that Tetsurou is making him lunch and they're going on their first date.

By social dating standards it's nothing special and incredibly cliché, and he's fairly certain Tetsurou stole the idea from Koutarou. A simple picnic in the park. Nonetheless it's special for Kei and will be no matter what they do. He's nervous about it, stomach fluttering at inconvenient intervals, reminding him that this is everything he wants and everything he doesn't want to lose. Because some part of it, of their relationship, still feels fragile, like something that could slip through his fingers.

"It's going to rain," Kei says, not for the first time, seeking the argument and Tetsurou's voice to distract his fretful mind.

"The sky is clear and blue," Tetsurou responds, smiling as he sweeps his arm in the direction of the skylight above the kitchen.

"It's windy."

Tetsurou raises his eyebrows in question. "What does that even mean?"

"The forecast said it would rain and wind moves the clouds, so that blue sky you're relying so heavily on will disappear quickly."

"Would you prefer to go see a movie and have lunch at a restaurant?" Tetsurou asks, already smiling because he knows the answer and is enjoying this conversation far too much. Kei grimaces at the idea of all the other people and the rigid formality of it. "Exactly," Tetsurou says, grinning victoriously. "Picnic it is."

As with anything Tetsurou does, his movements are confident as he prepares food in his own kitchen, weaving from cupboards and draws, slicing fruits and vegetables and meat. He looks comfortable and relaxed, immensely enjoying the creation process. Kei watches with rapt fascination but forces his eyes away when he finds himself biting his lip while desirously staring at Tetsurou's arms and hands and mouth.

"Okay, all done," Tetsurou declares as he stashes a container of berries in his backpack along with the sandwiches and water bottles. "Let's go."

He smiles at Kei as he shoulders the backpack and makes his way to the front door. Despite the clear blue sky and sunshine, the air is cold. At least Kei thinks it is. Tetsurou, with his natural higher body temperature, probably thinks differently.

Kei shivers as they walk out of the comfortably heated house, doing up his jacket and upturning the collar to protect that back of his neck. He's about to shove his hands into his pockets when a large hand catches his and envelopes his skin in warmth. Kei frowns, looks down at their hands and then up at Tetsurou.

"What are you doing?" Kei questions slowly, confused.

"I believe it's called 'hand holding,'" Tetsurou replies with amusement.

"I mean, why? What if someone sees?"

Tetsurou sighs but his grip only tightens on Kei's hand. "I know we agreed we'd keep this – us – quiet and while that makes sense at school, God knows I don't want you having to deal with those immature assholes, but I won't repress everything I feel and want to do any time we step outside. If someone sees… then they see and we'll deal," he explains, glancing at Kei nervously. "I mean, if that's okay with you."

It had been Kei's idea not to flaunt or publicise their relationship, Tetsurou had agreed, but only after making unnecessary assurances that Kei knew he wasn't ashamed about it. Kei knows Tetsurou well enough to know he doesn't need to worry about that, but the clarification had been comforting and so completely Tetsurou, he shouldn't have been surprised.

Kei's not afraid of people or what they'll say about him. He decided on secrecy to protect Tetsurou, because even if he acts as though the rumours don't bother him, Kei knows that each one eats away at him and makes him question himself and who he is.

Kei nods and strokes his thumb across Tetsurou's knuckles. "It's fine with me, Tetsu. Besides, I need your hand to keep me warm."

Tetsurou chuckles. "You're always cold, but I'll do my best."

They lapse into an easy conversation about the team and today's winning game. The way the bracket is playing out, it seems Nekodani have already nudged out the two biggest competition teams in the first two games. There are only two games left to play and the teams they'll likely face aren't playing at their level. Based on form, Nohebi seem to have been their only real competition for the Regional Tournament title and the ticket to the State Championship.

"Anything could happen though, Kei. We could match up badly against one of the teams, or choke, or suffer injuries," Tetsurou says, spreading a blanket on the thick green grass in the park. "We still need to play our best."

"Aye, aye, Captain," he responds with a smirk as he crosses his long legs underneath him. Tetsurou gives him a playful shove in the shoulder, making Kei lose balance but he gets an arm out before he topples over.

Like the attentive patriarch he is, Tetsurou unpacks the food and organises it carefully between the two of them, ensuring they each get the right nutrients from the meal. Kei quickly retrieves half of his sandwich to hide a fond smile, with the added benefit of preventing any lectures about eating properly. Tetsurou doesn't seem to notice, his eyes roam the park as he eats and Kei recognises his pensive expression. He doesn't ask what he's thinking, knowing Tetsurou will divulge his thoughts when he's ready.

Instead of staring at the bob of Tetsurou's throat when he swallows – because that is disconcertingly hypnotising – Kei follows Tetsurou's gaze around the park. There are three small children playing enthusiastically on a playground in the distance, with beanies and scarves and jackets done up tightly. Two mothers watch the children fondly from the bench, chatting quietly and smiling. A group of middle-aged men are playing two-on-two basketball on Kei and Tetsurou's usual court, they're pretty terrible but they seem to be having fun.

"Did you…?" Tetsurou starts and frowns, seeming to reconsider his question or phrasing. "Have you always been interested in guys?"

The question isn't entirely unexpected, they've never implicitly spoken about Kei's sexuality. Tetsurou's unspoken acceptance apparent for as long as he's seemed to have known about it. His curiosity about it now is understandable, even with what Koushi told him, Tetsurou is the type of person who likes to hear these things directly.

Kei nods slowly. "For as long as I've been attracted to anyone, it's been boys. Didn't have to really contemplate it or anything, haven't ever seen girls like that."

"And Koushi, he was the first boy you were attracted to?"

The wording of the question makes Kei hesitate, his mouth opening and closing without speaking. Tetsurou notices of course, glancing at Kei with inquisitive dark eyes.

Swallowing hard, knowing where this line of questioning is leading, Kei shakes his head and answers anyway. "No. That's… Daichi was the first…"

Tetsurou's eyebrows rise in surprise, the corner of his lips twitching. "Really? Daichi? I don't really see…" he trails off, his eyes and smile broadening dangerously. "Tsukki! Dark hair, dark eyes, solidly built and a leader. Am I your replacement for Daichi? I'm offended!"

Kei rolls his eyes, not worried in the least with Tetsurou's teasing tone. "You know you're not, dumbass. Daichi was just—he was just that first silly crush thing. I didn't even really know him when I was attracted to him. More than anything it was just embarrassing."

"Do tell," Tetsurou encourages excitedly, nudging him in the side.

Heaving a sigh, Kei drops his sandwich, dusting his hands of the crumbs, and leans back on his hands. "It's not some scandalous story, so you can stop salivating, Mr. Drama Queen. I was a freshman, I had a crush on Daichi, a boy I played basketball with and therefore saw naked, or there about, a few times a week. I mostly managed to control myself, but one day I just couldn't stop staring and—you know, got hard. Koushi noticed and smuggled me out of the locker-room before anyone noticed. I was scared, but Koushi was nice, consoling and understanding. He told me Daichi, his best friend, was straight and that's when he suggested a distraction, in the form of himself," he finishes, shrugging.

Tetsurou hums thoughtfully. "Koushi's done a lot for you. Not sure whether I want to thank him or hit him though."

"Probably neither. You know that Koushi and I were never… We never had feelings for each other."

"No, I know," Tetsurou answers quickly, smiling reassuringly. "I have nothing against Koushi, he's an amazing person and I'm so glad you have him in your life. Yet, all that logic doesn't stop the idiotic jealousy at the thought of the two of you together."

Kei snorts. "Now that I can understand. Which makes even less sense because Ana isn't a good person and not someone you even remotely like." He pauses and frowns. "Seriously, Tetsu, what were you thinking?"

Tetsurou laughs loudly, freely, and then leans into Kei, resting his head on Kei's shoulder and groaning. "I have absolutely no idea. I don't think I even was thinking," he admits and sighs. "It sounds stupid, but, I honestly can't tell you what the fuck I was doing before I met you, Kei. It wasn't even that long ago and it just feels so strange to even attempt to remember. I don't even want to think about the time before I met you. Feels… lonely."

Kei stills, his heart swelling with Tetsurou's words. He wants to say that it doesn't sound stupid at all, that he feels the same way, that he's never been happier than when he's with Tetsurou. But he also doesn't want to say any of that because that would be embarrassing and embarrassment is something Kei avoids at all costs. Instead, he leans into Tetsurou's warmth and takes Tetsurou's hand, holding it between his own and tracing patterns over his skin.

"Basketball, you were mostly focussed on basketball before you met me," Kei finally responds, remembering all the times Tetsurou said 'basketball is everything.'

"Right… Basketball…"

Tetsurou's words are softly spoken and sound distracted, his fingers curling into Kei's touch. Tetsurou's weight lifts from Kei's shoulder and he turns to meet Tetsurou's magnetic gaze. Kei can feel it, feel the pull that drew him to Tetsurou's lips that brave and stupid first time. Tetsurou's eyes flutter down to his lips and Kei feels relief so profound it overwhelms his heart-racing anticipation.

Kei promised himself he'd follow Tetsurou's lead, give him the time to grow accustomed to this new situation, but he's been drowning with need. From that one real kiss they shared, Kei realised that kissing Tetsurou is worth the exaggeration of 'best thing in the world' and it's been borderline impossible to wait. Kei wets his lips and—

Tetsurou's glances away and Kei's stomach drops.

"We should finish lunch," Tetsurou says, sorting through the food. "You really should eat some blueberries, they're high in Vitamin C and K."

"I'm not hungry," Kei mutters through clenched teeth. Something is wrong, he knows it is, and yet Tetsurou won't tell him or talk to him. A drop of water splatters annoyingly over the left lens of his glasses, blurring the tense line of Tetsurou's shoulders.

"Kei—"

Raindrops abruptly fall hard and heavy all around them and Kei glances up at the dark clouds blanketing the sky. The 'I told you so' tickles at the back of his tongue, but Kei is too annoyed to say it. Instead he simply stands, completely unperturbed by the rain, as Tetsurou swears and hurriedly packs away the food and blanket.

Kei follows behind Tetsurou as they make their way back to Tetsurou's house, his mind swimming with unanswered questions and musings that only get more troubling in the deafening silence of the downpour. He can't feel the rain soak through his clothes, cold and heavy, and he can't see the splatters of water blurring his vision. All Kei focuses on is the seething, aching worry that sits uncomfortably in his stomach until it boils over and he just stops walking.

Tetsurou seems to notice and turns back to him, hunching against the rain and frowning. At least he cares that much, an absurd, bitter part of him thinks.

"Kei?" Tetsurou calls, raising his voice over the loud rain.

"Why won't you kiss me?"

"What?"

"Why won't you kiss me?" Kei demands, almost shouting though he knows Tetsurou heard the initial question and is merely surprised. "It's been—what?—nearly a week. You avoid it, all the time and I can't… Do you not want to? Is it because I'm…?"

Anger flashes over Tetsurou's face. "Of course not!"

"Then why? Because I know you're avoiding it, I'm not stupid."

Tetsurou sighs and glances up at the rain. "Do we have to do this here? Can't we go inside?"

"Tell me now," Kei growls.

"Of course I want to kiss you, Kei. I want to do nothing but kiss you. But…" Tetsurou trails off, scratching the back of his neck. "I've already fucked up far too much to expect anything. I don't ever want to push you or make you uncomfortable. I broke your trust, only a week ago, and I want to make sure you trust me and feel comfortable with me again before I even consider… other things. I want to let you set the pace, because I'm happy as long as you're happy, Kei."

For some reason, despite how well Kei knows him, he's surprised by Tetsurou uncertainty and selflessness. Still in awe of Tetsurou's ability to completely and utterly put the people he cares about before himself. For someone who's usually so self-assured and charming and mischievous, Tetsurou can be so vulnerable.

Kei sighs heavily. "You're such a fucking idiot, Tetsurou."

"I—sorry, I'm—"

Kei closes the distance between them in three long strides, so quickly that Tetsurou actually flinches backwards, probably thinking Kei is pissed off. Kei slows at the last second, cupping Tetsurou's face and carefully, even in his desperate haste, kissing him. Tetsurou gasps against his mouth in surprise but his hands find Kei's hips quickly, pulling him closer.

They're both soaking wet and Kei has to push Tetsurou's hair off his face where it's flopped near their mouths, but Kei doesn't care. All he cares about is the warmth of Tetsurou's mouth, their lips sliding and sucking and tongues dancing together. Kei arches his back, as if he could get any closer to Tetsurou, his fingers clutching frantically in the back of Tetsurou's coat and in his hair. It's the complete opposite of the last slow, soft kiss they shared, but it's just as wonderful. A different kind of wonderful. Kei's heart races and his breath rushes in and out his nose, anything so he doesn't have to part from Tetsurou's mouth, even though he feels slightly lightheaded.

"Kei," Tetsurou murmurs against his mouth, but Kei doesn't let up, doesn't want to stop. "Kei, we… we should go… inside."

Growling, Kei pulls back, but only far enough to stop kissing. "If you say some shit about getting sick in the rain."

Tetsurou smiles, his lips pink and kiss swollen. "Of course not, being out in the rain doesn't actually make you sick, that's just a bunch of horseshit. But I'm getting kinda cold, and if I'm cold you must be freezing."

Kei hums, because he is extremely cold but as long as he's kissing Tetsurou he doesn't notice it. He kisses Tetsurou once more but steps back, not wanting Tetsurou to be cold. The wet clothes do feel rather gross and he can't see very clearly.

Smiling brightly, Tetsurou takes Kei's hand and leads him back to his house. Fumbling with his keys, Tetsurou gets the door open and they almost fall through the door in their hurry to get inside, despite the fact that neither of them can possibly get any wetter. Panting heavily, Kei simply stands there, staring down at his dripping clothing.

"What now?" Kei asks, looking through the water distorted lenses of his glasses at a messy Tetsurou.

Tetsurou grimaces down at himself and then around at his perfectly pristine house. "Um. Shit. Okay, fuck it. Just take off your coat, socks and shoes and we'll deal with the rest upstairs. It's too cold here."

Unlike Kei's house, Tetsurou's has central heating that seems to keep the entire house temperate, no matter the weather or season. Kei disagrees, thinks that it's fairly warm downstairs, until they're in Tetsurou's bedroom and Kei just wants to sigh with relief at how pleasant it is. He didn't know just how cold he really was and now the icy prickle of his wet clothing is almost unbearable.

Tetsurou grabs some towels from a cupboard and, without much thought, other than 'must get warm', Kei and Tetsurou strip out of their saturated clothing, turning away from each other with habitual locker-room etiquette. Kei cleans his glasses, not to his usual standard but tolerably, at least he can see.

Kei's down to his t-shirt and boxer-briefs when realisation worms it's way deep and distractingly into his mind. Fingers pausing at the hem of his shirt, he squeezes his eyes closed and listens carefully to the sticky sounds of wet clothes being removed. His jaw clenches as various images from the locker-rooms of Tetsurou's bare skin flash provocatively through his mind and Kei can't stop himself any more than he could from kissing Tetsurou that first time.

Slowly, Kei turns and as soon as his gaze meets Tetsurou's naked form, his mouth goes completely dry. His gaze unabashedly roams the plains of damp, tanned skin; across the ridiculous, mature breadth of his solid shoulders, down the heavy muscles stretched over his shoulder blades, down the finer muscles of his back, to his slender waist and the dimples on his lower back. Kei's fingers curl tightly, fighting the alarmingly powerful urge to touch the smooth skin over the swell of Tetsurou's ass.

He holds his breath as his gaze moves down to Tetsurou's coveted thighs, the skin Kei has seen the least, covered by the material of basketball shorts and towels. Tetsurou's thighs are thick and strong, Kei knows how powerful they are, has watched him wrestle opponents under the basketball hoop and win with the strength of those thighs. A surge of overwhelming desire plunges in his abdomen. Kei needs to touch him. Now.

Tetsurou remains unmoving, Kei doesn't know why, hasn't had the capacity to even contemplate why, until he feels those burning amber eyes on him. The desperate desire reflected back at him in Tetsurou's eyes forces him forward.

Kei pulls his own lip between his teeth and drags his tongue and teeth along it firmly as he gazes distractedly at the defined contours of Tetsurou's muscles across his shoulders and chest. Entranced, Kei raises his hands to Tetsurou's chest, fingertips gently skimming heated skin. He pushes his palms flat against the muscles and feels the rapid rise and fall of Tetsurou's heavy breathing.

Gaze indulgently roaming up the length of Tetsurou's neck, Kei feels his way up Tetsurou's shoulders, squeezing the muscles there, and following the line of his gaze, coming to rest at his neck, thumb stroking over the erratic beat of his pulse point. Kei steps closer and, mercifully, brings their bodies together, his skin luxuriously warmed by Tetsurou's. He meets Tetsurou's gaze, brown irises a thin ring around lust blown pupils.

"It's very dangerous," Kei murmurs softly.

Tetsurou's breath is hot and heavy against his lips. "What is?" he asks, voice low and rough.

"Letting me to set the pace," he explains, leaning in closer and maintaining eye contact. His lips brush Tetsurou's as he whispers, "You have no idea the things I want to do to you, Tetsurou."

Tetsurou's sharp inhale is the only warning Kei gets before their lips are mashed together. Tetsurou tilts his head, breathing heavily into Kei's mouth before sliding his tongue in and exploring his mouth. Tetsurou kisses him firmly, precisely, ardently; not soft or frantic like their earlier kisses, but meaningful and measured. Kei melts into it, his fingers sliding greedily down Tetsurou's chest, mapping the heated curves of muscle.

Tetsurou's stomach hollows and he moans softly against Kei's mouth as Kei's fingers smooth down his stomach. Kei realises why and opens his eyes. He had been too lost in the overwhelming bliss of the kiss to notice the hardness pressed between them. Experimentally, Kei pushes his hips forward and watches Tetsurou's brow furrow, a whimper escaping between their mouths. Flames lick pleasantly through Kei's body, desperate heat curling in his abdomen and weakening his knees.

Smiling at their reciprocated need, Kei grabs Tetsurou's hips, almost moaning again as his thumbs rest on hip bones and his fingers press into the soft flesh of Tetsurou's ass. Tetsurou follows obediently as Kei pulls him towards the bed, their mouths never breaking apart.

Kei pulls back, Tetsurou chases his lips but Kei speaks.

"Lie down."

Surprise registers on Tetsurou's face for fraction of a second before he practically throws himself down on the bed and attempts to pull Kei down on top of him haphazardly. Kei resists, setting his glasses down on the bedside table and carefully pushing his knee between Tetsurou's thighs, kneeling between them before laying down on top of him.

Resting his elbows on the bed either side of Tetsurou, Kei rolls his body down and thrusting his hips skilfully, creating desperately desired friction.

"Oh, fuck," Tetsurou breathes, hands seeking Kei's waist. Finding the damp cloth of his t-shirt, Tetsurou immediately slips his hands under it, warm hands sliding up Kei's back. Kei pushes back onto his heels to pull the material over his head and throw it somewhere, anywhere, he's really not paying much attention because Tetsurou's arousal darkened eyes are burning heat through his skin everywhere they look. His neck, chest, waist, stomach, hips, thighs. He's still damp from the rain but Kei can't even feel it, not for the fire Tetsurou's eyes and body and existence sets alight in him.

Kei leans over him, breathing raggedly and using every ounce of will-power and control to stop himself from simply taking, from abruptly and enthusiastically drawing more desperate sounds from Tetsurou, from immediately setting about unravelling Tetsurou.

"Do you trust me?" Kei questions, holding Tetsurou's gaze intently.

Tetsurou nods fervently. "Yes, yes, Kei. Of course I do."

His hands reach up, fingers curling around Kei's ribs and thumbs caressing reassuringly against his skin. Kei can see hints of nervousness and curiosity in Tetsurou's expression and reminds himself that Tetsurou has only been with girls.

"I won't do anything…" Kei trails off, uncertain how to finish that sentence. Overtly homosexual? He can't say that, he knows Tetsurou would trust him to do anything, no matter how 'homosexual', but wants to ease him into it. Instead, Kei lines up their cocks and presses their bodies together again. "Just…"

Kei rolls his hips and Tetsurou groans loudly, his hands sliding down to settle on Kei's hips and pulling him encouragingly. So he does it, again and again, panting between deep, passionate kisses with anticipation and effort.

"God, Kei, that feels so fucking—" Tetsurou cuts himself off, capturing Kei's mouth and moaning into it.

The intense heat of Tetsurou's skin everywhere it's touching his own is overpowering and he tries to drown himself in the ecstasy inducing whimpering, groaning, moaning sounds Tetsurou makes, swallowing them hungrily. Kei finds himself chasing the sensation of Tetsurou's pleasure rather than his own, focussing on the way Tetsurou trembles and writhes beneath him.

Tetsurou thrusts up against Kei, his hands tightly gripping Kei's ass and attempting to pull him down at a faster pace, but Kei carefully controls the movement, rolling his hips deliberately. Until Tetsurou starts begging, needy and breathless and irresistible. Kei complies and hastens his movements, pleasure burning hot and low in his abdomen at the friction.

"Fuck, yes," Tetsurou groans loudly, his head tilting back abruptly and thighs squeezing around him. Kei sets his mouth against Tetsurou's throat, sucking at his flushed, damp skin and revelling at the reverberation of his moaning. "Kei, Kei, fuck, Kei…"

Tetsurou is quickly losing himself, murmuring Kei's name over and over and rutting desperately against him. Kei loves it, listens and feels and focusses on Tetsurou, savouring the skin-tingling sounds and breath-taking sight.

In his enthusiasm, Tetsurou's fingers dip into the crevice of Kei's ass and it sends an electric shock of pleasure up his spine. Kei arches his back and sucks a little too hard at Tetsurou's neck. The pain seems to push Tetsurou over the edge, his body shuddering and tensing underneath Kei as he cries out, moaning Kei's name. A new, warm wetness smears across Kei's stomach and he continues to move until Tetsurou lets out a long breath and his body relaxes. Stopping seems to take more effort than continuing, but Kei ignores his aching cock in favour of watching Tetsurou coming down from his orgasm, eyes closed, expression calm and breath steading.

Kei's brushing back stubborn black strands of Tetsurou's hair when Tetsurou's eyes flutter open, a bright smile spreading his lips into a broad, satisfied grin. Then he frowns, glancing down between them.

"Kei," Tetsurou says, hand sliding down Kei's stomach and pressing against the painful erection tenting his boxer-briefs. Kei grits his teeth ineffectively, failing to bite back a groan. "You're still hard."

"I'm well aware," Kei breathes, attempting to sound unaffected but missing the mark by a mile. "Tetsu—"

"Roll over," Tetsurou instructs in his commanding Captain voice, which will now likely arouse Kei at every damn practice. Despite saying it, Tetsurou doesn't even give Kei a chance to move, grabbing Kei's hips and rolling him onto his back.

Tetsurou props himself up on his elbow, lying beside Kei and tilting his head to kiss him. The kiss is languid and deep, lacking the heat Kei needs. He's about to take control or protest when he realises that Tetsurou is stalling, collecting himself and building up courage. So Kei lets him stall, gives him all the time he needs; enjoying Tetsurou, enjoying the kiss, enjoying the warmth, enjoying the closeness, enjoying his boyfriend and the fact that he's even here, sharing this with Tetsurou.

Tetsurou's hand smooths down his side, the gentle touch making Kei shiver, and he pushes his fingers beneath Kei's waistband. Kei sighs against his mouth as Tetsurou's fingers trail the sensitive skin at his hip and down his thigh, removing the boxer-briefs. Kei's impossibly hard cock sits hot and heavy on his stomach and he forces himself not to touch it because he would just about to anything right now to have Tetsurou touch it.

"How do I—? Do I just…?" Tetsurou murmurs, his voice tense and awkward as he looks down at Kei.

Unable to stop himself, Kei snickers and immediately slaps a hand over his mouth, as if that could stop it. He expects Tetsurou to bristle, and while his cheeks colour with minor embarrassment, he actually smiles fondly down at Kei.

"What? I don't—I've never—"

"I know, I'm sorry," Kei says sincerely, stretching up to kiss Tetsurou softly. "Here."

Kei takes Tetsurou's wrist and places his hand in the sticky come on Kei's stomach and then moves it to his cock. The contact makes Kei's hips jerk forward and he swears under his breath, breathing carefully and evenly because his control is about to snap but he wants – needs – Tetsurou to do it, to do more.

"Just like jerking off," Kei explains, meeting Tetsurou's gaze steadily and watching his throat bob as he swallows hard and nods. "Honestly it probably won't take much, after watching you come," he murmurs, breath hitching and eyes fluttering closed as Tetsurou's fingers curl firmly around him.

"You're so fucking gorgeous, Kei."

Tetsurou strokes his thumb experimentally along the vein on the underside of Kei's cock and Kei immediately feels all his muscles tense, his toes curling. Tetsurou seals his lips over Kei's moan and licks into his mouth. As Tetsurou strokes him, firmly and steadily, with some guidance, Kei feels like all his nerve endings have been set on fire. Not just because he forgot how amazing it feels to have someone else do it, but Tetsurou is touching him.

"Tet—Tetsu," Kei gasps away from his mouth, fingers gripping into dark hair. Tetsurou rests his forehead against Kei's, watching raptly. Kei can't bring himself to care or be embarrassed by the intensity of his dark amber eyes, can't focus on anything other than the smooth, slick motion of his strong hand stroking him, making him feel, "sh-shit, so good, Tetsu. So, so, so—"

Tetsurou twists his wrist and slides his thumb over the head and it's too much. Kei's orgasm rushes through him forcefully, his back arching off the bed as he clenches his jaw and moans uncontrollably. It sears through his tensed muscles and aches blissfully down his spine.

The tingling sensation slowly fades and Tetsurou kisses his face – his cheeks, his nose, his forehead – tenderly, reverently. Kei leans into Tetsurou, but he moves away. He opens his eyes in a microsecond of panic, but Tetsurou merely reaches for the towel at the end of the bed and cleans the come off Kei's stomach. The soft towel brushes his oversensitive skin and Kei flinches.

"Sorry," Tetsurou says, throwing the towel away before lying back down beside Kei.

Silence falls between them and Kei listens to Tetsurou's steady breathing, trying to match it with his own. He watches Tetsurou's fingers trail tentatively down the pale skin of his chest and stomach, trailing the lines and curves of his muscles and ribs.

Tetsurou is unusually quiet, his expression pensive, and a sliver of worry breaches Kei's peaceful, content mind. Had it been too much? Too soon? Was Tetsurou not ready to be this physical with him?

"I'm sorry, was that…?" Kei asks, tentatively.

"Fucking wonderful? Best orgasm I've had? A religious experience watching you fall apart? Yes, yes and hell yes," Tetsurou says, tone playful but sincere.

Kei smirks, ignoring the pleasant flip in his stomach. "No, I meant, sorry if that was too soon or too fast or—"

"I swear to God, Kei, if you're apologising for that, for literally the hottest and most fucking incredible thing that has ever happened to me, has ever been done to me, I might have to leave."

Kei snorts. "I'd like to see you try."

Tetsurou opens his mouth, hesitates, eyes roaming down Kei's body, and closes it again. "Touché."

With a deep sigh, Tetsurou settles his arm across Kei's chest and curls into his side. Kei knows he wants to say something, but since he's already guessed wrong once, he certainly won't attempt to again. Tetsurou kisses him absently, his neck and jaw.

"Thank you, Kei," he finally says, murmuring quietly against Kei's neck.

With a frown, Kei faces him, their noses touching. "Will you ever stop thanking me?"

"Probably not."

Kei clicks his tongue, exasperated. "What is it for this time?"

Tetsurou touches Kei's face, thumb gently stroking across his cheekbone and fingers tangling through his damp hair. "For being patient with me. For being so fucking incredible – honestly, how you can do that with your hips and then dance so stiffly, I will never know. For putting up with my idiocy. For wanting me. For kissing me in the rain," he smiles, brilliantly, beautifully, breathtakingly. "For being you."

Kei is grateful he's lying down, grateful he's probably already flushed, grateful his heart is still beating rapidly. It feels like it's going to beat out of his chest and expose, too soon, how undeniably and irrevocably in love he is. He loves Tetsurou. Fuck, he loves Tetsurou so much.

"Why," Kei grits out between his teeth, "are you so goddamn embarrassing?"

He shoves Tetsurou and is rewarded with a low, flirtatious chuckle as Tetsurou rolls half on top of him, holding him, kissing him. Kei welcomes it, melts into it, expressing his feelings through the kiss until he feels comfortable enough to tell Tetsurou. If it's this overwhelming and intoxicating only a week into their relationship, Kei's not sure how much longer he can restrain himself.

"We should probably shower," Tetsurou says against his mouth. "You must be freezing."

Kei hums. "You keep me warm," he says, pressing a quick kiss to the corner of his mouth before sitting up. "But, yes, shower please. I feel…" he grimaces, "soggy."

"You go first then."

Kei rolls his eyes. "Such a gentlemen. Come shower with me, idiot. We do it all the time and by the size of your house I bet it's more than big enough."

"I shall ignore all the penis innuendo you just laid out perfectly for me…" Tetsurou trails off and frowns. "Wait, that sounds even dirtier. Anyway," he continues. "I'd like to point out that it's a little different when we're alone and ridiculously gay for each other."

"We don't have to do anything, Tetsu. I'm too tired," Kei says, muscles aching with the memory of the intense game of basketball they'd won earlier in the day. "Just—come on."

"Okay, fine. But I warn you, I have absolutely no control of my dick when I'm around you, especially when you're naked and wet and unfairly attractive."

Kei scoffs, following Tetsurou out of the room. "I don't want to hear that from you."