Warren
Kirsty's colleagues wouldn't leave us alone. I was surprised that Adam hadn't put in an appearance, were they not really that close? Did he not care about her? He brought her home that day but he did say that Tess had made him and that he had a girlfriend. Was there really nothing going on between them? I couldn't help but go over and over that question. I'd been asking myself it ever since I found that text from him but it looks like there was nothing going on after all.
Unfortunately the rest of her work colleagues weren't leaving us alone that easily they were visiting all day everyday and I wanted to scream at them to leave us alone but I had to hold up my concerned and caring husband act. I was concerned this was nothing like Kirsty but I was getting more and more frustrated and angry at her. Why was she doing this? Did she even know what she was doing? I didn't know what to think.
Mom was the one keeping me sane. She kept the house clean and tidy and she was putting meals on the table, everything Kirsty should have been doing for our family but wasn't. Mom would have never done this to dad and I, she was always there doing the right thing for us putting us above her just like Kirsty should do but doesn't. Kirsty puts her job over us, Adam over us, most things over us. Not like mom, she always had dinner waiting on the table for us the house was always spotless. Why couldn't Kirsty be more like her? Why couldn't she care about us as much as mom cared about dad and I?
Nita has spent most of her time locked in her room or out with friends. I haven't seen her probably in days. She knows the truth now and wants nothing to do with me. I can't even make Kirsty talk to her; I can't even make Kirsty talk to me. I've tried and a couple of times I've been a grain of sand away from loosing it with her but I'd managed to hold back and restrain myself, just about. I knew that her friends were hanging around too much for me to get away with it; they would pick up on almost any new injuries quickly and start asking questions and with her just sat there not moving there wouldn't be much if anything or anyone to blame it on. I could tell they felt guilty about not noticing before now and weren't about to let anything else happen. She was on their radar and not about to fall of it anytime soon, especially because she'd become a shell that doesn't talk, eat or sleep. They wanted her better, we all did and they weren't giving up on her. I don't know whether it's a good or bad thing. It's good because I know that they will give her the best treatment so that she can get better and go back to being Kirsty but on the other hand they are going to make her see a counsellor and be interfering in our lives for ages yet. The bad out weighed the good but there wasn't a lot I could do about their new presents in our lives, just hope that Kirsty starts talking soon so we can all get back to normal.
Things weren't going to be easy to fix with Nita either. I could tell she hadn't known for ages but I don't know how she did find out. She refused to talk to me, look at me or even be near to me. Mom thinks that she's not coping with the way Kirsty is reacting, or not reacting to her and I'm not about to put her straight. I've listened when mom's gone on and on to Nita about how she shouldn't be taking the situation out on me and that it's Kirsty who is refusing to speak to her and she should be glad to have a parent who is willing to be there for her and loves her unlike Kirsty. I've even listened to her tell Nita that Kirsty doesn't love her. Nita refused to believe her at first but mom kept saying it and saying that if Kirsty did love her then why was she doing this to her. I'd stepped in a couple of times when she really did go too far but I needed Nita to see that I was all she had at the moment and I was there for her whereas her mother wasn't. I wanted her to know that I would never ignore her because I loved her too much to do that to her whereas Kirsty didn't. I needed to be the good cop again. I couldn't stand to be the bad one in my daughter eyes. She's my whole world and I couldn't stand to be seen that way, not by my daughter.
In a way Kirsty was making it easier for me to get Nita back on side. I used her silence as a symbol that Kirsty didn't care for her as much as I did but it didn't seem to be working. If anything it was making her resent me more. I'd seen her biting her lip through every single one of mom's 'little chats' and if it was me I would have snapped a long time ago but she hadn't. It amazed me that she managed to showed so much restraint even when it was my mom talking to her, I know how bad she can get when she's trying to tell you what it right and what is not when you don't believe her but in the end she always gets her way and you start to believe what she is telling you right or not. I'd seen her do it many times and it always scared me a little the power she had over people no matter who it was but in this case it was a good thing and something I needed to get my daughter back and I was going to use it to my full advantage.
Tess
After my shift I went over to Kirsty's. I had no idea how to get through to her. Nobody else had managed to so far and I didn't think I was going to have any more luck than them. Kirsty and I had never really seen eye to eye. She was always fighting to get the best for her patients and go above and beyond to get the best for them. I never really understood why she fought so hard for this until I found out about the abuse. At first I didn't believe it. I thought there was no way that Kirsty would put up with that. Not after the rough talking too's she gave to others like her who came in. But then I thought back over the time she had been working at Holby. She'd been in her fair share of scrapes. I know better now than to believe she was mugged that evening. She was so sketchy about the details, I should have realised before. She insisted she didn't see anything and not to involve the police. I should have pushed the matter further but she seemed in control. She was a little shaken but that was all.
If I ever got my hands on David now I couldn't be held responsible for my actions and I'm sure it would be the same for everyone around here. Although sometimes misguided, Kirsty had a heart of gold, one that he took advantage of. I can't see why Kirsty put up with it. She's the most unlikely person I would have thought of to put up with it and yet she did. I'd spent quiet a bit of time over the past couple of days thinking about it. If I hadn't seen the injuries for myself I would have had a hard time believing that she let that happen to her. She was always fighting to get the best treatment for abuse victims and urging them to leave their partners and yet all along she was one of them and did nothing about it. Ignoring the advice she gave to others and demanding that they make the change in their lives for the better when all along she was too scared to take her own advice and to do it for herself.
It was going to take along time before she got back to her old self, if she ever did. If the past few weeks were anything to go by I didn't hold up much hope.
The first thing I noticed when I saw Kirsty was a fresh bruise on her cheek. Apparently she hadn't moved since they had brought her home so how did she get it.
"I don't know," I hadn't spoken out loud but I guessed I'd been staring at the bruise and Warren had seen me, "I came down this morning and there it was. I can't work out how she did it but if she's up and moving around that's a good sign isn't it?" he look hopefully at me as I nodded slowly.
I left Kirsty's house feeling slightly uneasy. I hadn't managed to get a word out of her or even look at me but there was something else, something more was wrong but I couldn't put my finger on what it was. There was the bruise for starters but it seemed to be more than that. I poured myself a glass of wine and settled down on my sofa flicking on the TV trying to concentrate on something else.
Kirsty
Everyone had been to visit me. Noel and Big Mac came yesterday they didn't stay long. It got very awkward very fast when they could find nothing to talk about with Warren and Kathy was giving them dirty looks from the doorway, they soon made their excuses and left. They had tried to talk to me and told me what I had missed and all the gossip, which earned them even more dirty looks and even a couple of tuts which made me very close to letting out a laugh luckily I swallowed it but they had given up before they came knowing that we weren't very close and the chances of them being able to get me to speak was very slim.
Tess had come this morning she noticed within milliseconds of seeing me the new bruise on my cheek but she brought the story which Warren undoubtedly had ready for when the questions came. She hadn't given up as easily as Noel and Big Mac she sat with me talking about the ED how everyone misses me and she even spoke about Emily and Jay and how everyone can see that there perfect for each other but they are still unwilling to admit it and giving each other the run around. I was happy for them. I think they would make a perfect couple they seem so well suited. They have come over here a couple of times together they have never come apart and they look and sound like a couple already. Just like Noel and Big Mac, Tess gave me little up-dates on everyone but they all failed to mention Adam. I desperately needed to hear about him and hoped every time the door rang that it would be him coming to visit me but it never was. I'd got to the point of sitting through peoples 'up-dates' praying that they would mention Adam but no one ever did. Did he just fall of the face of the earth?
Nita hadn't been down for one of her midnight visits for a couple of nights. It was most likely because Kathy had found out about them and had put them to an abrupt stop. I couldn't imagine how hard all of this was on Nita but I knew it wasn't half as hard as finding out the truth. At least I could still protect her from that. I smiled slightly as I heard the familiar sound of a bed room door opening. She was coming to see me. She slipped into the room and found her usual spot beside me. She was quiet for a couple of minuets before she started.
"Mum, its ok to talk to me. I'm on your side I always will be. I need you to get better. If you don't how will we ever get away. You can't carry on like this. What are you going to do sit here in this spot for the rest of your life? I know, everything. I'm not going to let it continue. I love you, that's why we have to go." She reached up gingerly and gently touched the bruise on my cheek, she'd thought Warren had done it to me; she knew.
For the first time in weeks I acknowledged someone other than Kathy. I turned my head in shock to look at her.
"You know?" I whispered like a small child with a secret. She nodded not being able to bring herself to speak. "I'm sorry, so, so sorry. You were never meant to know. I never wanted you to know." I couldn't believe she knew. I knew things had been bad between her and Warren since I'd been home but I'd had no idea why. Tears slipped down my cheeks both in sadness and relief. She didn't hate me but she should never have had to live with this burden.
"I'm so sorry sweetheart." I cupped her face in my hands holding on desperately to the feel of her warm cheeks under my cold hands, hoping that it wasn't going to fade away like all the times I'd imagined this moment whilst sat here.
"No I'm sorry mum. I should have known. I shouldn't have always taken his side." I cut her off there this was not her fault and I was going to make sure she knew that.
"You have nothing to be sorry for, you hear me." I looked deeply into her eyes telling her that none of this was her fault. I knew she would need more reassurance than this but it was a start. I pulled her into a hug and never wanting to let go and then I whispered the three words I'd so badly wanted to tell her for what seemed like an eternity.
"I love you."
"I love you to mum," and with that more tears fell over my cheeks.