Hello! Updating again, will try to update regularly but have gotten busy busy. Happy Monday and please review :)
By 19 weeks there was no hiding the fact that Kate Beckett-Castle was with child. Her belly had swollen to the point where she could no longer comfortably sleep in any position other than her back, and she was running out of clothing that fit. The perfect solution, according to Alexis, was a girl's shopping trip. So, that Saturday, Kate, Alexis, Lanie and Martha all ventured to the best maternity shops in town, with Christopher in tow.
Alexis insisted on carrying the child, alternating between holding him in her arms and pushing him in his stroller. The red-head found it very amusing when people would eye her, somewhat judgmentally, as they assumed that the boy was Alexis' child. Kate smiled at them both, feeling a strong sense of pride and affection as she absent-mindedly caressed her baby bump.
She felt fortunate that Alexis was with her, as she swayed the vote in favor of 'best' meaning most variety and highest quality, as opposed to Martha's definition, which was most fashionable and expensive. Lanie seemed to take the middle ground, appreciating the rational, but loving the fashion. They went from store to store, buying clothing in a variety of shapes and colors. She picked out several belly bands, so that she had options to continue wearing some of her jeans for the time being.
At their last stop Lanie presented her with a soft pink contraption that had Velcro, padding and long straps. Kate looked at her quizzically, having absolutely no idea what the material was for. Lanie walked up to her and motioned for her to turn around before commanding Kate to raise her hands. She wrapped the material around Kate's lower abdomen and found that the large pad in front lifted her baby bump slightly and the padding on the other side braced and supported her lower back.
"This miracle", Lanie began, "will come in handy in just a few months when you're in your third trimester, it will take the weight off of your lower back. It will be your best friend." She continued to walk down the store aisle, leaving Kate to unstrap the adjustable device from her abdomen.
"Oh, and Kate," Lanie yelled to her, "you might want to pick up a body pillow."
Kate yelled her reply to Lanie, "Castle is my body pillow, I think he'd resent you suggesting he be replaced." As soon as the words were out of Kate's mouth, she heard a very distinct "eeew," coming from somewhere a few aisles down. Kate and Lanie exchanged grins as Kate meekly called "sorry Alexis."
Discussion of her body pillow caused Kate to once again think about how much she'd missed her husband while he'd been traveling. However, the knowledge that he'd be home tomorrow carried her through the day, as it would be her last night sleeping in bed alone. She ached for him, simply for his presence, for the feel of his hand on her back, his kisses, his smell, and his body. She sighed to herself as they continued shopping.
As they made their way towards the checkout aisle they passed the baby clothing, requiring them to stop. Kate immediately made her way to the section for baby boys, identifying an adorable bath robe complete with a hood. It was light blue with fluffy clouds, perfectly matching the design that they'd gone with for the boy's room.
Lanie came up to her and asked, "are you that positive that you're having a boy Kate?" She looked at Lanie, confused for a second before smiling.
"No, I have no idea what I'm having, my little Castle baby won't show his junk." Kate commented, earning a giggle from Alexis and an eye roll from Martha. Kate looked up to her mother-in-law, and deciding to tease her further, reacted to the woman's eye roll,
"oops, sorry Martha, or her junk. The baby won't show her junk." The older woman acted resentful, which was easy to see through, as she simply stated,
"the mother of my grandchildren, referring to precious little body parts as junk." Martha spoke, softly squeezing Christopher's cheek and directing her words to him apologetically for dramatic effect. He simply babbled at her in response, smacking his small hands on the plastic security table on the stroller and giving a long 'dadadadadada...babababa.'
This earned laughs from the other three women, and a smile from Martha. The fact that Martha had said grandchildren, including Kate as a mother-figure to Alexis and a mother to Christopher was not lost on the detective, who couldn't have wiped the smile from her face if she tried. Kate finally looked back to Lanie to answer her earlier question.
"Lanie this is for Christopher. He'd look so adorable in this." She turned to both Martha and Alexis for their confirmation, meeting their agreeing expressions. She smiled warmly as she thought about the boy sitting before her. There was no denying that Kate had fallen in love with him, and it had only taken a few days alone, which had occurred the previous week, time alone with him had eased her self-doubt and melted her heart.
The previous week
Rick Castle loved to be domestic. For all of the fame and fortune that had been bestowed upon him, he loved nothing more than a relaxing afternoon at home with his family. On this particular afternoon he was struggling with how to break a certain piece of news to his wife.
They'd returned from her 18 week checkup with a good bit of disappointment. They'd both done their research, and Castle had personal experience enough to know that Kate had finally reached the exciting point in her pregnancy where they could identify the sex of their baby.
After the routine examination procedures, such as weighing her and checking her blood pressure, they'd gotten another look at their baby, who was continuing to grow at a seemingly healthy pace. The doctor informed them that Kate was far enough along in the pregnancy that loosing the child before birth seemed less of a possibility, and it was time to consider having genetic tests for defects run for the baby.
Although there was no single medical test that could capture all possible genetic defects, some of the more common ones would be identified through amniocentesis. So, both parents decided to go ahead and schedule an appointment at 20 weeks to have the fluid sample drawn from the baby's amniotic sac.
The last thing they did during her appointment was identify whether the growing child was a male or a female. Unfortunately, on that day the baby had positioned itself in such a way that no anatomy could be identified. Therefore, both parents left with a sense of disappointment. However, their let-down over not knowing what they were having was tempered by the knowledge that Kate would most-likely not lose the baby before it was born.
As they completed household chores that afternoon they discussed many topics, finally reaching the one Rick was dreading when they entered their bedroom. Kate stood on one side of the bed and Rick on the other and together they stripped the sheets from their bed. Soon, fresh ones replaced them, each spouse taking a corner of the bed and tucking the sheet in before moving to the other corner.
"So, I got a call from Paula today." Rick began to speak.
"Yeah. What's up?" Kate asked as she took the other side of the flat sheet he was shaking.
"She says that I'm needed for a book tour." He tucked the flat sheet under the end of the mattress as Kate did the same on her side.
"Oh?" Kate spoke, not sure she liked where the conversation was going.
"Yeah, it will be just for a week and then I will be back here with you." He spoke as he moved for a pillow case. She could tell by his expression that he was worried about what her reaction would be.
"When would you be going?" She asked him as she shook the pillow into the fresh pillow case. She softened her voice to ease the tension in his brow.
"They want me in Chicago next week." He spoke softly, knowing that Kate would not react well to such a sudden departure.
"Next week!" She exclaimed. "Don't they believe in a little advanced notice?"
"Paula swears that I agreed to this several months ago, but I don't recall having done so." He explained to her before adding, "Look Kate, if it bothers you too much I can choose to not go."
"No," she sighed, "you need to go. It is your job. Think of all you've been willing to put up with when it came to my job. The least I can do is afford you the same courtesy." She smiled at him, although the sadness was still on her face.
He smiled at her as they both placed the pillows on the bed, then moved to pick to dirty sheets off of the floor. "I love you." He told her softly from across their bed.
"I love you too." She answered, walking over to where he stood and placing a kiss on his lips, "it's just a week and then you'll be back."
"If you need anything, any help with Christopher at all, you'll have it." Rick told her.
"I know. Martha will be right here and she is always supportive of me." Rick moved to the hamper and dropped the sheets there before returning to his wife. He took her in his arms, getting as close as possible with her pregnant belly in between them.
"For as much of a headache she can be, my mother has a heart of gold." He spoke.
"We are both lucky to have her." She added as she laid her head on his chest and listened to the steady beating of his heart.
He leaned his head into her hair, tilting his chin down and inhaling her scent. "I love the way you smell." He told her.
"I'm a pretty big fan of yours too. It was one of the first things I think I became addicted to when I fell in love with you. I could sense your presence simply by the mix of your cologne, soap and Rick-ness." She emphasized her point by inhaling his scent.
"Rick-ness?" He questioningly teased. Is that a new word?
"Yes." She smiled as she spoke, "it deserved it's own addition to my vocabulary."
He laughed into her and she reveled in the feel of his chest shaking with the movement.
"We should probably eat dinner soon." He changed the subject.
"Yeah. I think baby Castle is hungry." He lifted his head and raised an eyebrow at her.
"Really? The baby is hungry?" He challenged her.
"Yes. As a matter of fact the baby is very hungry. Our child has a craving for Chinese food and I fear that if we don't comply, we may never be shown his or her junk." She explained.
With that he laughed. "Well, I certainly don't want her holding out on us."
"I agree, so let's not make him angry." They both smiled, as they'd had a little competition over who would correctly guess the baby's gender. As they did with everything else, they'd set a wager on it.
If he was right and it was a girl, she would owe him what he referred to as a 'favor of a sensual nature,' to involve her compliance with his desires; which could be redeemed at any time of his liking.
She agreed, but only after they'd added the addendum that if she were extremely pregnant and uncomfortable, he would take a rain check. She wasn't too worried, as she knew he would never make her do anything she wasn't comfortable with.
On the other hand, if Kate was right and it was a boy, Castle would owe her three full-body massages, redeemable at any time of her liking. He readily agreed and had no issue with her having three. Afterall, to give a full-body massage, he'd be able to have his hands all over her. It was a win-win situation for him.
Deep down, they knew it was a win-win situation for the both of them. They also didn't have a strong attachment to ether gender, as long as the baby was healthy, they were happy. Kate did think it would be nice for Christopher to have a little brother to play with, given that they would be so close in age. Rick, on the other hand, loved every minute of raising Alexis, that he was eager to do it again with another little girl.
Bright and early Monday morning Rick headed out, suitcase in hand and ready for the airport. He'd said goodbye to Alexis the night before, which wasn't dramatic as the girl was going to be busy with projects until Friday night anyway.
They held each other for a minute, leaning into one another and resting forehead to forehead. Instead of wrapping his arms around her, he simply rested both hands on the curve of her abdomen. They whispered softly to eachother, stopping every few moments or so to softly kiss eachother.
Martha Rodgers couldn't hear what they were talking about, but she loved the sight before her. From the moment she met Kate she felt that the woman was special, that she was real and that she had something to offer her son that none of his previous relationships had. There were certainly times where she doubted that they would ever get to where they were, but they did.
She sighed as she watched the sight before her, the way her son softly caressed his wife's unborn child, their child, brought tears to her eyes and a smile to her face. It was such a tender moment between the two, who were clearly very much in love.
As they separated to say goodbye, Rick looked up to his mother to wave to her again. They had already said their farewells, and he'd already kissed the child in her arms goodbye. With one more kiss placed tenderly on Kate's lips he headed out the door.
Kate took a deep breath and turned around, offering to take the child from Martha, who had a class to teach. With a smile the older woman handed Christopher over to Kate, reminding her to call if she had any problems. With that, Martha headed out.
The next several days put Kate to the test like she never had before. She was accustomed to having Rick or Martha with her, both of whom naturally assumed primary care of Christopher. Although she'd stepped up more and more, putting her anxiousness aside, they were always right there to help her.
On that first day, Martha remained out all afternoon and most of the evening. It left Kate on her own with Christopher, all the decisions for his care and his routine up to her. They spent the morning on the living room floor, Christopher sitting up completely and taking great pleasure in playing peek-a-boo.
She carried him with her to lunch, feeding him carrots and bananas before changing his diaper and placing him in his crib for bed. She leaned in and kissed him tentatively on the forehead, singing him a lullaby before heading out of the room. Before she turned off the light, leaving him with his space lamp, he sat himself up, placed a hand to his mouth and then threw it out towards her.
She laughed to herself happily, as the boy was doing what Alexis had recently taught him. He was blowing her a kiss. Her heart warmed a little and before she thought twice about it she returned to him, kissed him and whispered, "sweet dreams my love." What startled her the most about her words was how natural they felt.
She spent the afternoon cleaning up the living room and the kitchen, finishing the laundry and pulling out leftovers to defrost for dinner. By the time she was finished with the housework, Christopher's cries alerted her that he was awake.
After another diaper change she brought him into the living room and placed him in front of his giant dinosaur toy. He delighted in it because it allowed him to throw plastic balls into it and when they rolled down the toy would produce funny noises. His own babbles would accompany the sounds, as he produced noises that started to sound more like the beginnings of words, "babababababa."
Soon she scooped the boy into her arms and loaded him into his stroller. As they made their way outside and towards the park she picked up a latte for herself and watched as Christopher pointed out a variety of things to her. At one point he pointed to a dog in the park and, looking back to Kate said "Da." She smiled at him and spoke,
"Yes Christopher! Doggy!" He smiled brightly back to her and laughed excitedly, bouncing his arms and legs in the stroller. Soon she led them to the tree that she and Rick liked to sit under, spreading a blanket out and seating them in the shade. She provided him with a sippy cup and his favorite stuffed toy.
After several sips he dropped the cup and shifted himself to his knees, where he proceeded to crawl to the edge of the blanket and touch the grass. Each time he would look back at Kate and giggle, slapping the grass with his hand. She clapped her hands to support his exploration and his smile grew bigger.
She couldn't get over how much he had grown in the last 9 weeks. They'd had him over 2 months now and he was crawling, drinking from a sippy cup, eating some solid foods, babbling word sounds and sitting up without problems. He also had taken to smiling widely at her every time he saw her.
For her part, Kate was taken with his blonde curls and his big blue eyes, a definite trait of his dad and his sister. She loved his eyes. She also loved his little round body and his soft baby cheeks. When he smiled she could see where the boy was cutting a few teeth. Many days it made him uncomfortable, so they always had teething toys around.
That evening she bathed him in his small tub, using care to avoid his eyes as she washed his hair with baby shampoo. Although she'd helped with bathing him before, this was the first night she'd done it completely on her own. After he was clean she placed a soft towel that seemed to swallow him up around his body and gently dried him off.
Once dry and in his pajamas, a soft yellow onesie that was covered with giraffes and elephants, she gave the boy a bottle, burped him and rocked him to sleep. Once he was out, she placed him softly in his crib, checked that the monitor was on and charged, and proceeded to the living room. There she sat, the other monitor near her, and read a book.
When Martha came home she was pleasantly surprised to hear how well the day had gone. Not because she doubted Kate's abilities, but because the woman seemed so much more confidant in her own skills. Martha joined her on the couch and they chatted.
They talked about Martha's stress with her newest project, Shakespeare's The Tempest, where the woman complained incessantly about the actresses playing the Aspects of Ariel not getting their lines in sync. Kate told her about their trip to the park and Christopher's goodnight kiss at nap time. They both enjoyed a drink, Kate of warm milk and Martha of wine, before heading to bed.
The next several days passed in much the same way. Kate and Christopher would play in the mornings after breakfast, nap in the afternoon and go to the park. Kate would grab her decaf latte as usual and take him to the tree. She brought a shape box with them and allowed the boy to try and fit each shape in the appropriate hole, congratulating him when he got one.
At night she'd sing him to sleep and he would be awake for her in the morning, sitting up with a wide smile on his face when he saw her. On Thursday afternoon when Christopher woke from his nap he was screaming, his face was red and he had a low-grade fever. Panic filled Kate as she tried to figure out what was wrong with the boy.
She called the pediatrician and got an appointment for the same afternoon. She tried to soothe him, but he continued to cry. She noticed that he was pulling on his left ear, which was very red. She couldn't tell if the redness was from an infection or from his pulling. Regardless, her heart broke for the boy.
In that moment she'd never felt so completely helpless, as she paced the living room and held the wailing child close to her. "Shhhh, little one. I know it hurts. We're going to make it all better soon." The baby whimpered for a minute, but continued to cry. She rubbed his back and placed kisses on his head, inhaling his smell.
"Christopher, it's ok. We're going to make you feel better soon my love…oh, my sweet baby. I know you're hurting." She was struck by how strongly she felt for the boy at the moment, she realized that if she could have taken his pain she would have. That was the moment that Kate-Beckett Castle officially fell in love with Christopher Castle, who for all intents and purposes, was now her son.
It was nearly 6pm by the time they got back from the pediatrician. Christopher was diagnosed with an ear infection in his left ear, most likely brought on by allergies while outside. Kate felt guilty for having taken him out so much, but the doctor assured her that it wasn't anyone's fault. "Babies get ear infections every day", he told her.
He sent them home with an antibiotic, pain-relieving ear drops, and instructions to bring him back if his fever went over 101. She changed him into his P.J.s, soft blue with cartoon puppies covering it, got him to eat a little, and rocked him to sleep. That night she sang him a song she'd just remembered.
"Dragon tails and the water is wide. Pirates sail and lost boys fly.
Fish bite moonbeams every night, and I love you.
Godspeed little man; Sweet dreams little man.
Oh my love will fly to you each night on angel's wings.
Godspeed, Sweet dreams.
Christopher tried to keep his eyes open, but he was fighting a losing battle as her voice lulled him into a peaceful slumber. His little fists curled tightly, repeatedly squeezing then relaxing, into her shirt while his chin rested on her shoulder. As she softly stroked the curls in his hair, she continued to sing.
The Rocket Racer's all tuckered out. Super man's in pajamas on the couch.
Goodnight moon, will find the mouse; and I love you.
Godspeed little man; Sweet dreams little man.
Oh my love will fly to you each night on angel's wings.
Godspeed, Sweet dreams.
She thought about the little boy in her arms, about all that had transpired that day. She'd realized that she would have done anything to protect him and to take his pain away. His tears made her want to shed her own. She watched his round face as his lips moved in a gentle motion, sucking on the pacifier in his mouth. She leaned her head down and kissed him gently on his forehead, which now felt cooler, finally she sang the last verse of the song.
God bless mommy and matchbox cars. God bless dad and thanks for the stars.
God hears amen wherever we are, and I love you.
Godspeed little man, Sweet dreams little man.
Oh my love will fly to you each night on angel's wings.
Godspeed, Godspeed, Godspeed…Sweet dreams."
By the time she was finished singing the boy was fast asleep. She simply watched him, taking in his long eyelashes and the peaceful expression on his face now that he wasn't in pain. She knew it was time for him to go to bed, but she wasn't quite ready to let him go.
Although there was no rush to do so, Kate was sure of one thing. She had every intention to talk to her husband when he returned about making things official and adopting the boy. She wanted him to have a mother and a father in his life, and she needed to love him and protect him for the rest of her life, just like the unborn child she carried. Christopher, she thought, my son.
The song is called Godspeed, by The Dixie Chicks. I love it and used to sing it to my nephew while putting him to sleep when he was a baby. Very sweet song.