Disclaimer: Naruto is still Kishimoto-sensei's property.

A/N: Welcome back, minna-san! Our exams are finally over and phew, I barely finished answering all of those questions! After that I spent the next few days resting my brain for exhausting it during the exams.

All right, enough of that. Chapter 14 is here! School Affairs arc is swiftly coming to its end…if it weren't for my beta reader cutting the story off with cliffies. Sniff! Sniff! Anyways, enjoy!

Chapter 14: I do…Hell yeah!

The pretend priest coughed again then preceded to make the necessary arrangements for the ceremony. He adjusted his robe, smoothed his hair, and opened his bible to whatever page he wanted then faced the reluctant couple.

"Shall we begin?"

…………

6:46 PM

Kakashi raised his hands in a revered gesture. "Dearly beloved, we're gathered here tonight for the 'hasty' wedding of my beloved student, Haruno-chan to her egotistical, pompous, arrogant and stuck-up boyfriend . . . Uchiha-kun . . . "

"For the umpteenth time, I'm not her boyfriend!" Sasuke snapped then added, "And I'm not stuck-up!"

"Yeah, yeah whatever." The older man sweat dropped. Cheeky little brat…

Sakura winced. Holding the bouquet of white roses, she looked sideways at her unwilling partner. Understanding his reluctance, she didn't want to cause any more trouble. She looked back down at the ground, wondering when the ceremony would end.

"As I was saying earlier before you rudely interrupted the ceremonial rites, Uchiha-kun . . . " Kakashi picked up the bible and flipped it to a page. "Since the two people in front of me had come here of their own free will . . . "

Sasuke snorted. He wasn't enjoying this at all. Free will? Bah!

". . . So now I'm going to ask the two of you." Kakashi took a glance at Sakura who was blushing prettily underneath her wedding veil. 'Might as well ask her first. If I'm going to ask the bratty kid, he'll shower me more of his irritating refusals.' He coughed for emphasis then faced his student.

"Haruno Sakura-chan," he began and saw the girl jumped in apprehension. A smirk crossed his face as he asked her the question, which was often highlighted at real weddings. "Do you take this good-for-nothing, pretentious, ostentatious, portentous and stuck-up brat to be your lawfully wedded husband, so-help-you-God?"

Sasuke snapped again in the background. "For the last time, I'm not a stuck-up!"

"I . . . " Sakura faltered.

Am I supposed to say yes?

Should I?

Meanwhile, Kakashi and Sasuke waited for her answer with bated breaths. The silver-haired teacher crossed his fingers, wishing that the girl would say yes. "That's right my beloved student . . . just say those two little words . . . 'I do' . . . " he mentally urged her.

On the other hand, the young man silently wished that Haruno would say no and stop the wedding. 'She's still madly in love with that bad-assed Hyuuga. Of course she would say no!' he ruefully thought.

"I . . . I . . . "

Both men strained to hear Sakura's response. After a few minutes of stuttering "I's . . . " and "Uhms . . . " she took a deep breath and answered in a hushed tone.

"I . . . d-do . . . "

THUD!

Meanwhile…

Itachi tapped one finger under his chin as he thought of the possible places his brother would hide. Well, he did try looking all over the university and even checking out the classrooms. He encountered some of his teachers there and they were extremely curious in finding out his current situation.

"Itachi." Kisame broke his thoughts. The bored Uchiha gave him a nod. "I did what you requested. It's too bad, but he's not there either. Do you still have any idea of where he went?"

"Hmm…I don't know. But he's Sasuke for Yondaime's sake. He could be anywhere." Itachi snapped his fingers irritatingly. "Tsk. That dopey brat. Probably got scared of what I'm trying to make him do earlier."

Kisame glanced around his surroundings for a while when suddenly he stilled. He began to sniff the air, his nostrils flaring. "Wait! Sniff! Sniff! I smell something!"

"Oh please, Kisame. Don't be a numbskull," Itachi snorted. He fished a cigarette from his pocket and put it on his mouth. He took out his lighter then proceeded to light it. After blowing up a cloud of smoke, he eyed his tall friend who was still busy manipulating his nose, which to his opinion, looked like a shark's snout. "You're still doing that?" he asked dryly.

The sniffing continued until finally, smoke came out from Kisame's nares. "But I swear, Itachi-san! I smelled it! I can smell your brother's clean and musky scent!" he exclaimed.

Itachi cringed, shying away from him as if he suddenly had an onset of a disease. "What the hell are you talking about, clean and musky? Don't tell me you've been fantasizing about my ototou for such a long time, Kisame! You pedophile!"

Kisame yelped, shaking his head. "No! I mean, I caught the scent of your brother from over there!" He flung one outstretched arm to point the location to prove his point. Instead, it accidentally hit Itachi on the back. The impact almost lodged the cigarette inside his throat but, thanks to his amazing gag reflexes, he was able to avoid swallowing the entire thing whole.

The raven-haired man spat the cigarette on the ground with distaste. Maybe it was now time for him to stop smoking. He didn't want to die because of being choked by a cigarette, especially if it was an accident. An accident of someone whacked you at the back while taking a drag.

"Anyway," he began. "Let's resume the search. And this time, we'll follow your nose . . . err, I mean your instincts, Kisame."

Pleased that his olfactory skills were finally commended, Kisame led the way.

6:49 PM

School Grounds…

Neji clenched his fist. It was almost time for the fireworks display. His glassy eyes scanned his entire surroundings. The sky was getting darker and if he doesn't find Sakura soon, then it would be too late. Of course he wouldn't enjoy watching the fireworks without someone beside him!

The fireworks display in Konoha was simply included in the list for all the lovebirds to enjoy. The fireworks would only serve to bring a romantic mood to all the couples that would watch it. If by luck the mood turned cheesy, a kiss or two would do the trick. And that was what made Neji furious. He has to find Sakura so that he could kiss her while watching the fireworks display.

Cursing, he made a right turn next to a curio stall.

…………

"Wait!"

Tenten stopped running. She glared angrily at her friend. "What now, Naruto?"

"What if Sasuke-chan's no longer here? What if he already left?" Naruto asked.

"And how did that happen? Seriously foxface, do you think Sasuke would escape this place if there are lots of his fan girls flocking the school gates?" She gestured towards the platoon of obsessed females flanking Konohagakure's main gates.

Naruto sweat dropped. "Of course he wouldn't! You think he would allow himself to be captured by those hussies? Certainly not!"

"Right. That is why we have to find him. Or else he'll be toasted by those girls," the brown-haired girl replied and was about to leave when Naruto grabbed her wrist. "What?"

"But T! What if he's no longer here?"

"Do I still have to answer that? Let's just go!"

…………

Itachi restrained himself from doing anything harmful when he found himself and Kisame right in front of a graying cemented wall. The shark guy next to him gave laughed nervously. "Oopsie…looks like it's another dead end. But don't worry, Itachi-san! I promise you that we'll find your brother in no time!"

"We'll never be able to find him at this rate," he growled. Kisame cowered as he tried to shield his body behind the post. Itachi sighed as he looked around. 'Since this is the dead end, the only way to get back is to go through that way,' he mused as he stared at the entrance of another narrow path.

"Kisame," he ordered. "We'll go through that path."

"Yes sir!"

"Sasuke-san? Are you still alive? Please wake up!"

"Hn. Maybe he wasn't able to handle the stress of entering a married life."

"You're not helping, sensei! He might not wake up if you keep on teasing him!"

"Oh? If you have a problem in waking him up, then we'll just give him mouth-to-mouth resuscitation. Don't worry, I just got my license in basic life support and I guarantee that this will work. Now stand back and let me do it."

Wait a minute…mouth-to-mouth?

What the hell!

…………

Sasuke opened his eyes to find Kakashi leaning down to him, lips puckered up and a few inches from his own. "Aaaaaaahhhhhhhh!" he yelled out and pushed the teacher's face away from him. He immediately sat up, hugged his arms around his body in a protective manner then glared at him with twice the intensity enough to melt an iceberg. "What in the hell do you think you're doing? You-sick-perverted-pedophile!"

Kakashi rubbed his cheeks in mock disappointment. "It's a shame. He woke up. And here I thought that I would be able to do the 'thing' his fans have been dreaming about for a long time."

Sasuke recoiled in disgust and is ready to kill the person in front of him. "You!"

The older man stood up and dusted himself. "Well then." He turned to Sakura who was sitting beside Sasuke and gave her a lopsided grin. "Looks like you'll be able to have that opportunity to do that 'thing', Haruno-chan."

Sakura stared back at him in confusion. Apparently, she was too busy in restraining the irate Uchiha so she wasn't able to get a grasp of what Kakashi had said.

"Are you all right, Sasuke-san?" she asked him. Her hand went up to touch his shoulder. Sasuke flinched from the contact and averted his gaze at her. Sakura winced at his cold stare and she was suddenly afraid that he might explode at any moment.

"I…I'm all right," he mumbled quietly, trying his best to rein his temper. Running a hand through his hair, he raised himself off the ground. Keeping in mind that Sakura was also sitting down on the ground beside him, he stretched out a hand to her. "Just take it," he offered grimly, focusing his gaze at the darkening sky instead at her.

The pink girl accepted his offer anyway and gingerly pulled herself up. Both teens faced their teacher who was still grinning ear-to-ear. Sasuke resumed glaring at him while Sakura went back to being a blushing bride. Kakashi stopped smirking and his expression turned serious.

"Seeing the groom is no longer psychologically incapacitated, we'll continue with the ceremony." He opened his bible to where a clipping of his favorite book was pasted and pretended to read some biblical passages. Kakashi smiled inwardly through his mask as he shifted his gaze from the book to the fuming male in front of him. 'If this wasn't reality, I'm sure that I'm seeing smoke coming out of his ears…'

Trying hard not to laugh, he coughed then cocked his head to one side. "Well…now that Haruno-chan finally gave her most awaited answer, it's your turn…" Sasuke continued to glare at him but he didn't care. "Uchiha Sasuke-kun," he finished with a hint of slyness on his voice.

"Do you take my favorite and innocent Haruno Sakura-chan to be your lawfully wedded wife? Despite the fact that you would eventually face thousands of crying females and probably, males waiting to get a hold of your ass just because you didn't choose either one of them to become the future Mr./Mrs. Uchiha?"

Sasuke blinked. "What the…?" This wasn't how it sounded in those sappy and romantic J-doramas that Itachi forced him countless times to watch! Kakashi could pull his perverted and flashy stunts to Sakura but not to him. He clenched a fist and was about to interrupt but Kakashi babbled still, obviously paying no attention to him.

"And not to mention that a few years from now, while you're taking your walk down the streets, you suddenly caught your face on the cover page of a magazine with an article that says you were married to a very beautiful but unidentified young girl when you were still in high school!" Kakashi placed both hands on his cheeks and sighed dreamily.

"Wait a minute! You…"

"Sooner or later the whole world would know that little tidbit! Next, your reputation would suddenly go down the drain with hundreds of fan mails filling up your mailbox with sappy letters of unrequited love and declaration. Finally, you have no other choice but to find 'that' girl and prove to everyone else that you finally found true love. And for them to stop bothering you," he continued, totally wrapped up in his own fantasy.

"Wait! You…I oughta…"

"After that, you and your 'wife' would get back to each others arms again and continue where you left off! Ahh . . . then you're going to spend your honeymoon in a secluded hot springs that is only found within the deeper recesses of a forest. And then you and your luscious wife would take a bath together and you can't seem to take your eyes off her because you're watching the warm water cascading down her pale succulent body." A full-fledged blush crossed Kakashi's cheeks as he gave a girlish squeal of delight.

"And then after that, you reached out to her. After giving her a hot wet torrid kiss you placed your hand on her and then you and ending it with a . Ahhhhhh, what an earth-shattering climax!"

"THAT'S IT! I CAN'T STAND IT ANYMORE!" Sasuke cried out. He fixed his hand firmly over Kakashi's covered mouth, effectively stopping him from talking. The lazy-eyed teacher broke out from his reverie and stared languidly at the still fuming but red-faced young man.

"Why? You're eventually going to do that in the future," he said innocently.

Goodness, he was now seeing blood. "Don't try to test my patience, old pervert!"

"Oh…maybe you prefer boys over girls? And is that blood coming out of your nose?"

Sasuke poised his other hand into a fist and aimed it for Kakashi's face. "That's it! Even though you're a teacher, you're going to pay for insulting my sexuality!" He was about to make big blow to his face when Sakura wrapped her hands around his fist. He glared menacingly at her. "What…the?"

"Stop it, Sasuke-san! I apologize for my teacher's aberrant behavior but please try to remember that you're in a school! And you shouldn't try to hit those who're older than you because it's bad!" she reasoned out, her eyes watery.

"I…" he began. Damn it, what's with girls and all their crying? Realizing that she had a point, he sighed then dropped his hand to his side. All of a sudden he felt tired and all he ever wanted right now is to go back to his own room and sleep. He mentally bonked himself. Of course he wouldn't be able to go home unless he do Itachi's evil deed.

But first…

Sasuke plastered a reserved expression on his face, the kind he reserved for his parents when they last met and spoke calmly with formality. "Haruno-san is right. I apologize for my apparently rude behavior. Let's finish this ceremony so that she could finally be able to meet with her 'true' boyfriend and I'll be on my way."

Kakashi blinked. He became confused. 'When did this kid learn to switch personalities? First he was a hotheaded brat and the next he's a cool and calculated individual? Unusual.' He shrugged his thoughts away, thinking that it was probably a trait that is commonly seen in students attending in Sunagakure. 'I wonder if he also know that other guy who shares this same personality…'

"Very well, we shall now continue the ceremony. I'll rephrase my question. Uchiha Sasuke-kun, do you take Haruno Sakura-chan to be your lawfully wedded wife, in sickness and in health, for richer or poorer, till death do you part?"

"Hn."

Kakashi waved a finger at him in a mock gesture. "That's not the answer I've been wanting to hear from you Uchiha-kun."

Sasuke gritted his teeth. "Fine. I. Do."

"Splendid!" Kakashi clapped his hands together, relieved that the ceremony is finally over. "Now by the power invested in me by the members of the Marriage Committee, I declare you man and wife."

"Great! Now I can go!" Sasuke was about to turn tail and run when a hand latched onto his arm. He whipped his head sharply to see Kakashi grinning at him. He growled under his breath. He's now going to kill him for sure! "What is it?"

Kakashi stole one glance at his pink-haired student then to the boy in front of him. "Before you go, you forget to do one teensy weensy thing."

Sasuke cocked an eyebrow. He was already itching to go home and face his brother's supposed wrath. And at that moment, he's willing to listen and do whatever the perverted guy will say. "Look, I'm in a hurry. You better tell me right now so that I could do it fast and leave this place!"

"All right, if you said so." Kakashi let go of his arm and grinned widely that the contours of his upturned mouth were evident behind his mask.

"You forgot to…"

A/N: There you have it, Chapter 15! Sorry for the late posting but we just finished our finals and my brain is still recovering from its horrendous torture. It's going to be my last semester in the next few days so now I'm going to do my best in updating this fic! I'm in dire need of your suggestions and if you ever want to, you can give me a mail or add it to your reviews.

By the way, I'm going to post another batch of names in my "Thank You Bulletin" in the next chapter. And if you get lucky, I'm going to dedicate a chapter in your name! That is, if you're going to correctly answer the question posted below:

Kakashi said, "You forgot to…" – What are the next missing lines?

Please don't forget to post your answer and what you think of the story. Criticisms are also welcome and don't forget to give some suggestions (man, I'm asking too much! But it's for the good of the story…).

Oops! I forgot! Here's an excerpt from the next chapter!

…………

Next to him, Sakura was getting restless. She glanced at her watch and sighed in relief. "Three minutes…" she noted. She began tapping her fingers on her lap in an effort to pass the time. "After this, I'm going to make a call and apologize to Neji-kun…"

On the other hand, Kakashi mentally counted the remaining minutes while reading his book. 'Three minutes left,' he smirked to himself. Eyeing the two youngsters at the corner of his eye, his smirk widened.

It was a very good thing that these two brats were entirely clueless of what they're going to get themselves into…

…………

What do ya think? Once again, arigatou gozaimasu and ja!