Hello guys from across the pond! Wow looks like you guys are liking this story and I'm glad. Your reviews and comments are all amazing as always and I really appreciate it. There are quite a few unexpected twists and turns in this story so I hope you guys will stick with me and well, enjoy the ride. Here's the next chapter and I hope you'll like, although I can already hear some of you groaning in frustration :). Let me know what you guys think. Love you guys! Cheer! ;)

Chapter 12

Nathan stared out the window watching the rain trickle down the window, remembering how it rained the night he and Haley made love. Lucas's words still rang in his ears. He looked over his shoulder and saw Rachel stir in her sleep, her naked body covered by a thin layer of sheet. He knew he wasn't being fair to Rachel and he really was trying. But everytime they had sex, the only thing that made him go through with it was by picturing Haley in his head. He couldn't even muster the strength to call it 'making love'. He felt no love in his heart for Rachel. He cared for her but he could never love her, at least not the way he loved Haley.

He felt a pair of arms snaking around his waist and closed his eyes. Why is this so damn difficult? He turned around and managed a smile. "Hey, did I wake you?"

She returned his smile. "No you didn't. What are you thinking about? You look like you're a million miles away."

He looked into her eyes. Eyes full of love and trust. He caressed her auburn hair, feeling the silky strands between his fingers. "Nothing, I just couldn't sleep. Why don't you go back to bed."

She looked at him intently, the question burning on her lips begging to get out. "Nathan, can I ask you something?"

"Yeah, sure."

"Do you, I mean what are we?"

He turned away from her. He wasn't ready to answer that question yet, not when he had this emotional turmoil raging inside of him. "I don't understand what you mean," he said simply.

"I think you do," Rachel said exasperatedly. "What are we doing Nathan? Who am I to you? Am I just some girl you have sex with? Coz that's not what you are to me. In case you haven't noticed, I love you and I'm not sure you feel the same way about me." She waited for him to respond, and when he didn't he continued. "You love her, don't you? Haley I mean?"

He abruptly turned around and walked towards the bed. "Rachel, don't say things you have no idea about. I'm going to bed. Are you coming?" He laid down and closed his eyes, hoping that she would take the hint and drop the subject.

His reaction confirmed her suspicion. "No, I'm not. I know you're in love with her Nathan. I can see the way you look at her."

"Enough!" he yelled and sat up to look at her, anger flashing in his eyes. "Haley and I are just friends so drop it."

Rachel stood shell shocked. He had never raised his voice at her before, she must have pushed his button. She started to gather her things, picking up her clothes strewn across the floor as quickly as she could.

"Rachel, what are you doing?" Nathan asked wearily.

She got dressed without even looking at him. "I'm going home. I'm not sure which is worse Nathan, knowing that you're in love with someone else, or hearing you lie about it." She stared at him with teary eyes before leaving, slamming the door behind her.

"Dammit!" he cursed loudly. "This is just great," he muttered angrily. Not only had he ruined things with Haley, he's doing the same thing to Rachel too.

The next day found Michael at his desk, cursing under his breath. The Chicago deal was not going as smoothly as he anticipated it would be. He felt irritated and exhausted and Haley's plan yesterday did not nothing but unsettle him. He wasn't sure that it was a good idea to do what Haley had asked him to do. In fact he knew for a fact that the idea was a bad one. But his friend needed his help and he would be darned if he didn't do his best to help her. However, knowing the fact that he's going to deceive Nathan made him restless with anxiety although he knew that for Haley to keep her baby, there was no other way to do it.

A knock on the door only irritated him further. "What?" he barked.

"Sorry," a scared looking Haley poked her head through the door. "You're obviously busy and I should've called. I'll come back later," she said timidly. She was anxious to leave this side of Michael and come back to a more familiar version of him. One that wasn't so angry.

His demeanor changed instantaneously at the sight of her. "Oh Haley. Come in. I'm sorry. I was just in the middle of something." He saw that she wasn't entirely convinced that she didn't come at a bad time. "Oh will you just come in. What's up?"

Haley looked around his office and for the first time understood just how successful he really was. He motioned for her to sit down but she was just struck dumb at how big his office was.

"What the hell are you doing? Just sit your ass down," he said jokingly.

"Wow, some office you got here. Big glass window, big mahogany table, big leather sofa, big painting by somebody I don't even want to know but must have cost a bomb."

He just shrugged it off, completely oblivious to his wealth and success. "Those are just material things. They can easily be taken away just as easily as I got them," he said philosophically.

Haley laughed, the first genuine laugh she had since she found out she was carrying Nathan's baby. "Okay enough with the Dalai Lama talk. I just came by to see how you're doing, you know after the shocker I threw at you yesterday."

He ruffled through his already messy head. "Yeah, well I gotta hand it to you Haley. Way to spring a surprise on someone."

"Yeah, you and me both." She looked at Michael intently. "Do you think I'm making a mistake?" she asked. She then thought the better of it. "No, don't answer that. I don't want to know."

Michael watched her wring her hands, an obvious sign of distress. He sighed and walked up to her. He took her hands in his and looked her in the eye. "Haley, listen to me. It doesn't matter what I think. It's what you think that counts. Do you think this is the right thing to do, keeping Nathan in the dark about this baby. Tell me really, who in this situation are you mostly thinking about. The baby? Nathan? Or yourself?"

She felt herself crumbling and tears started to form in her eyes. She had been feeling teary lately, a combination of the pregnancy and everything else that was happening in his life. "God Michael. I don't know! I just know that I can't tell him right now."

"So when do you plan to tell him, if ever that's gonna happen? What are you gonna tell this baby? You want this baby to grow up thinking that his dad didn't want him? Haley, I'm not saying these things to upset you. God knows you're upset enough. I'm just saying the reality here. How long do you think you can live with this lie?" And dragging me along with it. He said although he left the last bit unsaid.

Haley's hand automatically flew to her still flat stomach and fresh tears started to fall. "Michael, I know I'm asking a lot from you but I don't see any other way. If I could leave you out of this I would, but Nathan and Rachel, they don't deserve this mess."

Michael groaned in frustration. "And what about you, huh? Have you ever thought of what you deserve?" he said, his voice rising with every word. "Haley, you keep running away from Nathan. You think by doing what we are about to do is gonna make things better?" He took a deep breath to calm himself down. "You said you wanted my help. I'm trying Haley, I swear to God I am. But have you thought this through? I'm asking you one last time, do you really want to do this? Because there is another way and you know it. But if you really do, then I promise you and the baby can count on me."

Haley listened to Michael's frustration, letting his words sink in and felt guilt wash over her. She knew she was dragging Michael and Peyton into this mess. She had always been confident, so sure of herself. Every decision that she had ever made was done in a calculative way, always done after she had weighed the pros and cons. And now for the first time, she felt lost. She felt her stomach turn and put a hand on her mouth.

"Oh God, I think I'm gonna be sick." She started to get up to make a run for the bathroom but the little fetus inside her thought it would be fun for mommy to throw up now. She saw a decorative bowl on Michael's table and quickly reached for it, retching until the feeling of nausea passed. When she was done, she looked at Michael who was looking as if he might throw up any minute too.

"You," he pointed at the bowl. "Did you just throw up in a 3000 bucks bowl?," he stammered. They looked at each other and burst out laughing. "Come here you silly girl."

She didn't need any further invitation and still grinning, she let herself be enveloped in his strong arms. "It's gonna be okay Haley. I promise." She nodded. "I'm not sure I can say the same thing about the poor bowl though."

Peyton was also thinking about Haley and the situation she was in and immediately felt sad for her friend. Sad because the answer she was looking for right in front of her eyes, and yet she refused to see it. She was too wrapped up in it that she didn't notice the man standing in front of her.

"Hey Peyton! Are you listening to me?"

"Huh? What?" She looked up and saw Nathan standing in front of her. "Hey buddy," she said, trying to compose herself hoping her voice sounded normal. "What's up?"

"Geez, where the hell's your head at?" Nathan looked around the office as if searching for something. "Is Haley in?"

Oh shit, does he know? "No, she's not. She went out an hour ago. She should be back soon. Why? Anything important?"

Nathan was looking restless and started pacing. "No. Actually yes, I need to talk to her about something."

Peyton stood up and went around the table to where Nathan was standing. She sat down at the edge of the table and touched his arm. "Nathan, I need to ask you something and I want you to be honest with me. We've been friends for so long and I think you owe me that."

He looked at her confused, unsure of where this was leading. "Yeah, sure."

"Okay, what's going on between you and Haley?"

"Oh God not you too. Will you guys get off my back about me and Haley already?"

"Honey, I'm only asking because I care about the two of you. So you wanna tell me."

Nathan gave in, knowing that she would continue to pester him if he didn't. "Okay, Haley and I are friends. We did sleep together one night but that was it. She practically shoved it in my face that she didn't want us to be anything more. Happy?"

Peyton looked at him incredulously. "Happy? Is that what you think I feel right now. Believe me mister, happy is the last thing I'm feeling right now. What is the matter with you two?"

"Peyton, things are already complicated as it is," she heard him say. Yeah, more than you know Nate. "And there's Rachel to think about. I love Haley but if she can't tell me that she feels the same way, then there's nothing much I can do about it. Maybe it's about time I move on and try harder with Rachel."

"Do you think that's a good idea? You and Rachel?"

"No I don't know if it's a good idea or not!" he yelled, clearly frustrated with the whole situation. "But I'm gonna try." Suddenly, the door opened behind them, making them both turn.

"Nathan, what are you doing here?" Haley asked nervously. It was the first time she had seen him since she found out that she was pregnant.

"Wow Hales, are you okay?" Nathan asked suddenly.

"Why? Why wouldn't I be okay?" She felt panic rising, wondering if Nathan had figured it out.

Nathan shook his head and grinned. "Nothing, you just look like hell. That should teach you not to stuff yourself like a pig," he said referring to the day they spent together at his place.

Relief swept over Haley's face when she realised that Nathan didn't have a clue about what's happening. "Oh, yeah. Totally."

"So erm...listen. Can I talk to you for a minute? I mean, if you're not too busy." He looked at Peyton hoping that she would take the hint and leave them alone.

She did take the hint and made a scene of cleaning up her desk. "Okay, I'm gonna go get some lunch. Hales, do you want anything?"

Haley shook her head vehemently. "No, I don't think I can stomach anything right now." She immediately bit her lips, hoping that she didn't give anything away. Fortunately, Nathan didn't notice. To his relief, in a few minutes Peyton was gone.

"So, what did you want to talk about?" Haley said and took off her jacket to hang. Nathan took the sight of her in, thinking how much self control he would have to exercise to make things work with Rachel with Haley around.

He ran his fingers through his hair nervously, not sure of where to start. Finally he said, "Hales, I've been giving this a lot of thought."

"Giving what a lot of thought?" she asked.

"Us." He walked up to her and put his hands on her arms, holding her at arm's length. "I love you Haley."

"Nathan-" she interrupted.

He silenced her. "No, listen to me. I love you and I just want you to know that. I know that you can't say the same thing about me and I won't force you too. I told you that Rachel makes me happy and she does. So I'm gonna try and make things work with her. But even with all these, I want you to know that nothing is gonna change between us. You're still my best friend and I'll always be here for you."

Tears sprang in her eyes as she took all his words in. She wasn't sure whether she was relieved or sad or even a mixture of both.

"Hey, what's wrong? Why the tears?" He gently wiped the tears that had flowed down her beautiful cheeks.

"Nothing." She smiled through her tears. "I'm happy for you. I really am." She looked at him sadly and resolve kicked in. All this while she was looking for something to convince her that what she was about to do was the right thing to do and hearing him say those words just made things easier.

"I'm gonna miss you Nathan," she said unexpectedly. Nathan looked at her curiously, not understanding what she meant by it.

"Hey, I'll still be here. I'm not going anywhere," he said and pulled her into a hug. He had made the most difficult decision in his life, hoping that it was the right one. Truthfully, he was hoping that by some small chance Haley would tell her not to stay with Rachel, but she didn't.

Haley held him close, feeling her heart break slowly into tiny little fragments. "I know. I'm so sorry," she whispered. She pulled away and they looked at each other, sadness written in their eyes. Like a moth to a flame they drew closer, their lips touching in the tenderest of kiss. Nathan closed his eyes and let his own tears fall as their lips met, knowing that this would be the last time.

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