Rosalina: I'm back! I know the authoress should be stu(dying), because tomorrow she has an English test, but I guess writing in English is the same as stu(dying), right?
America: Totes, dudette! *hugs Rosalina*
Rosalina: *struggles to breathe* Don't…touch…me…
Japan: Invading people's personal space is not very polite, America-san.
Danielle: Let's start with the 2nd part of our little grocery shopping fun?
China: Aiiiyaa! Yes, aru!
Germany: I guess our misfortune is razer entertaining for zee readers.
Rosalina: You are more than right, Germany!
Danielle: The authoress owns nothing. I own myself, Lina and Cat own themselves respectively.
Italy: Veee~ Andiamo with the chapter!
-Previously in How To Live With Hetalia-
"Come on, capitalist scum!" Haha, I'm not a communist, but it's fun to see Alfred taste his own remedy. At that point of our little shopping, I was already quite annoyed by my nation's performances.
"Hey! That was hurtful!" Alfred stood up from his position behind the stand and faced us with his hand on his heart in an overdramatic Mexican soap opera scene, "I'll not come back until you say you're sorry!" He crossed his arms.
I glanced at Arthur, then at Yao, and finally at Ivan. They were apparently as annoyed as I was, which is a good thing, that way if we kill Alfred and hide his body, nobody will miss him. I took a deep breath and called America with a little song from the game Portal I thought that would fit right now, "There's no sense in crying over every mistake, you just keep on trying until you run out of cake…"
"So that's a no?" Alfred raised an eyebrow lightly. I facepalmed hard.
Arthur seemed a bit angry at America. He stomped angrily his feet, but the only thing I could notice was his eyebrows frowning (which, frankly, looked much like two furry and fat caterpillars), "Come back here you irresponsible git!"
"Will I need to call authorities to send you somewhere 'safe'?" I crossed my arms, "Get back here before I chase you down with the pipe!" I looked at Ivan, and then realized my goal in life: If you're lazy to do it, let others do it for you, "Better yet, I'll let Ivan chase you down with the pipe!"
-Reality in Rosalina's POV-
I really thought that the Walmart today would be rather empty, since it's Monday and we're in the middle of July…Just then, a woman passed by us pushing a shopping cart much like ours. Everyone observed the woman with their jaws dropped (including me), because that's actually the first person to actually walk close to us (I mean, who would?). She stopped at a nearby shelve filled with children's hair products, opposite to the one the nations and I were. She was followed by a little black haired girl, who pointed a finger at Ivan,
"Mommy, look at those people! They are weird!"
"Sweetie, don't point your finger at people." The woman scolded, not looking at us. Well, not scolded, it was like a simple and motherly warning, "Don't seem surprised, we're at Walmart, the place for weird people, after all."
The girl had stopped following her mother, as she stared at us. She took a lot of time gazing at Yao, when she finally said, "Why are you wearing those clothes?"
"Lily! Stop bugging the girl!" Her mother scolded. Now she was really scolding.
I had to hold Yao's arms before he jumped out of the cart and beat the living shit out of the little girl and her mother, "But I'm a man! My name is Yao! Stupid westerns, aru!"
The girl quickly ran back to her mother, and both almost literally ran away from us, pushing the shopping cart away from the creepy people (I mean, us). I laughed so hard that I had to clean some tears off my eyes, "Hold on, Yao, just don't kill the girl because she thought that sexy ponytail of yours belonged to a girl!"
I was having a heart attack from laughing. The Chinese was with an expression like 'dude, stop', but I just couldn't. The Russian beside me was finding everything extremely amusing. The Englishman nearby just lifted one of his bushy eyebrows at my apparent stupidity. The American was laughing obnoxiously in the background. My belly and my jaw are literally burning from laughter.
"Are you even okay, dudette?" Alfred magically decided to come back from his hiding place and put a hand on my shoulder as I kept on laughing hysterically. I didn't even notice that he was touching me, for I was too busy laughing my ass off.
"I'm fine, just—" I couldn't even finish my sentence, "Pfffft! Hahahhahaha!" I was literally dying of laughter (and involuntarily making some inhuman noises as I did so). Yao was messaging his temple, still inside the cart. Arthur was also getting a bit annoyed at me. Alfred was laughing as well, but not as much. Ivan just smiled. I was having lots of trouble to breathe, but managed to continue making fun of the Chinese man, "When children… mistake you for… the opposite gender you… should look more at… mirrors!"
Yao sighted loudly, "Are you done, aru?"
"Wait a moment…" I laughed some more, until I wiped out the last tear in the corner of my left eye and took a deep breath, "Done."
Arthur clapped his hands together to capture everyone's attention, "Where were we before Rosalina decided to impersonate a dying pig?"
Hey! That was beyond offensive! "You are lucky that we're in a public place, Arthur." I said in a very low voice, before being cut by Ivan's louder voice,
"Discussing how America is stupid?"
"No, before that." Arthur shook his head, as he tried to remember stuff. Well, Artie, I said I was tired of your shit, so I'm not going to interfere anymore. I'm soooooo done! "Oh yes! I believe we were discussing how France is a stupid and immature git!"
"Yeah! Right there!" I take the part of interfering anymore back. Heck, keeping quiet was not in my instructions manual.
"Knowing the frog, he is probably posing for inexistent paparazzi at the wine section right around the corner." The British dude rolled his eyes dramatically. How does he know…that there's a wine section here? I didn't know that until, like, last week!
I put on the classiest expression I could master, "Are you hiding something from me, Arthur?"
"Why would I!?"
"Okay…" I decided to ignore that feeling that Arthur knew where Francis was and for some reason didn't tell me, "So, we're moving on to the wine section, since there's nothing else here." Now it was actually me who took hold of the shopping cart with Yao inside with one hand and my phone with the other. My menacing glare towards America, England and Russia made the three boys follow me without the need of verbal persuasion based on yelling and irony.
"What else do you have on your list?" Ivan was walking almost stuck into me, while he eavesdropped what I was doing on my phone.
"Nothing. Just the Axis and Francis now."
"Good. I'm hungry, aru." Yao turned inside the cart to look at us with a smile on his face.
"What is that picture of Turkey doing in the background of your phone?" I was forced to stop pushing the cart when Alfred took hold of my phone and kept frowning his eyebrows at the picture of the sexy Turkish man.
Ivan soon joined Alfred as he stared at the picture, "Дa, I would like to know it too."
"Know what?" Arthur finally caught up.
I violently took my phone from Alfred's hands, "Ahn? Who's this 'Turkey' you speak of?" I tried my best to make an 'innocent angel' expression. But I'm pretty sure I failed, because if there's one thing in this life that I'm not is an angel, because really, take a look at me? I decided to come up with a plausible excuse for the picture, "I think you're mistaking Martin Freeman for your friend." Turkey looks nothing like Martin, but it was the first name that crossed my mind. I shoved the cellphone inside my pocket once more to avoid further discussions.
"This is getting quite suspicious, Rosalina." Arthur observed. Well, I couldn't have guessed that. They'll figure out sooner or later that they're an anime and such, and that I know pretty much everything there is to know about all of them…
"Whatever… anyway, at any sign of a blond French please report to me." I continued pushing the cart, now humming the 'Mario Circuit' theme a second time, "Come on, Yao! The lean mean Chinese death machine is on again!"
"Choo choo, aru!"
"What the heck, dude?" Alfred raised an eyebrow at mine and Yao's little game. Well, Alfie, you're the only one who's paying attention to whatever shit Yao and I are doing, because Arthur is in dreamland (more like sleepwalking) and Ivan is still smiling at everything, "You're weird."
If Alfred continues to annoy me, I might turn into Godzila. What? No, because as far as I know, I'm not a giant-lizard-thingy. I'm more like Freddy Krueger.
"I'm the weird one? At least I don't hide in basketball stands to spy on people." I rolled my eyes. At that time of our little stroll around the corridors, I started to see little signs signalizing the wine section.
Booya.
"Look over there, aru! I can see the 'swooshing' hair!" Yao pointed at a very familiar patch of hair from a distance. That's Francis. Obviously.
Double booya.
"Good job, Dora the Explorer." I praised the Chinese boy. Actually, in Yao's case he would be Ni-Hao Kay-lan, that weird show pretty much like Dora the Explorer but it teaches Chinese instead of Spanish (I'm very grateful for Dora, she taught me all the Spanish I know). I noticed something as we got closer and closer to the Frenchman: there were other people with him. I really hope that he didn't try to rape anyone or such.
My little troupe finally arrived to where the frenchie was, and unsurprisingly, he was observing a bottle of wine with a confused expression, as if he was reading a cover of a book. The only difference was that he was surrounded by five girls who sighted in 'love' for the handsome French. FRANCIS HAS A FREAKING MINI FAN CLUB. All of them were wearing some quite ridiculous clothes, all of which revealed more than they should. I think I could recognize some of the girls from school (in the 'bitch' category of my acquaintances), but I'd rather not bother with that.
When the girls noticed our arrival, they started giggling. Oh crap. Now I have 100% of certainty that they are bitches. And not the 'good' type of sassy bitches (that's me), it's the slutty type, I mean, I can literally see one of the girl's uterus from here due to her short skirt.
"France, dude!" Alfred called out, in his usual obnoxious voice, "And dudettes," He greeted the giggling girls, who didn't even notice him, ha ha, "Stop looking at those wines, dude! Coke is much better!"
"Quoi?" The French turned back to us, still holding a bottle of wine. The girls started to stare creepily at us. Really, those girls (who were dressed like whores) have nothing else to do during summer rather than be at a random Walmart? We live in a beach town, for goodness' sake (not that I enjoy beaches, I hate sand)!
"Are you even old enough to drink, Francis?" I said, leaning on the cart like a boss. Ivan glanced at me with a smile. Yao distracted himself with his Hello Kitty.
"I'm older than you think." The French frowned, and the girls sighted in awe at his beauty.
I rolled my eyes dramatically, at the sound of Arthur's facepalms, "Let me guess…you're 10? That's older than I thought."
"Silly mademoiselle!" Francis honhonhon'd. Another delightful sight for his fangirls. I'm getting quite annoyed at this, to be honest.
"Are you looking for a wine that goes with a new cheese you just invented, frog?" Arthur joined in, before I started to beat the crap out of someone with Ivan's pipe.
Francis turned to his admirers and said, in the most seductive voice I had ever heard, "Oh, ma-chers, don't mind them. They are some acquaintances of mine, more specifically the one with the freaky eyebrows, Arthur Imbeciléland."
"Bloody frog!" I could listen to Arthur gritting his teeth in building angry. The remaining Allies and I exchanged worried glances, "Only you would do say such a thing! How immature!"
"Aiiyaaa! That's my line, aru!"
"Don't tell me what to do, eyebrows!" The French put back the bottle of wine back in the shelf and took a step closer to the British.
Oh God, this is going to get good.
"Oh! It is ON, bloody French toast!" Arthur snapped, now wrapping his hands around the French's throat.
"Should we stop them, aru?" Yao wondered, looking at the rest of us as the two blonds exchanged bitch-slaps. I could listen to the girls sighting and saying stuff like 'he looks so gorgeous when he fights!' and 'Oooh! So manly!'
"I say seat back and enjoy show." Ivan replied, still smiling.
Alfred lifted up his hand at me for a high-five, which of course, I accepted, "Totally, dude! I hope they break their necks and die!"
"Where are you guys from? Like, you guys have totally strong accents and, like, really weird clothes." One of the girls asked. She had long bleached hair and she was wearing a tight yellow tank top, and very skinny jeans (I don't know how her livers are not being squeezed by it). To top it off, I was sure that she had something like 3kg of makeup on her face. I recognized the character from school. She was in my Biology class, and she was one of the skinny bitches (not 'skinny', in this case only skinny legs and arms, but huge legs, butt and boobs) I mentioned earlier. In fact, all of the five girls are, but none of them apparently knew who I was. Their leader, however, knows who I am, but thankfully, she was not hunting elephants on a random Walmart like her minions.
The girl's obnoxious voice reminded me of Poland for some reason.
I had to make an excuse for this, "We're a travelling circus from…" I started to say, but I couldn't think of a country where we could be from, and since those wankers don't know about me, a harmless lie will do it.
"Denmark." For my relief, Alfred completed my sentence, not with the confidence I wanted, but still, "That's a country, right?" He added quietly.
Arthur and Francis were still fighting, but nobody was giving a flying fuck for that.
"Yeah," I replied to Alfred, in an equal quiet tone, then added, "Dumme mennesker…" I'm so proud of myself right now! I knew that learning insults in different languages would pay off sometime! And seeing the delighted looks on those girls' faces as they thought I had complimented them was something I will never forget, although I wanted to say this to their leader, but that can wait.
With that, the girls decided it was not worth to stay staring at Francis (because his perfect hair was not so perfect now, since Arthur's fingers were pulling it) and they moved on to their next prey, for my relief the unlucky man was very far from us.
"Do you know them?" Ivan suddenly asked, as he observed the girls getting away.
I shrugged, "I know them, but they don't know me,"
"How can you put up with them, aru?" Yao wondered. Hell, even I don't have an answer for that.
"They remind me of a certain Polish dude," Alfred added, yet again, without being invited.
"I don't know…The only thing I know is that they look like mini Alfreds." I said with a malicious smile.
I was about to give up all my hope in trying to bring Arthur and Francis back home (since they were still fighting), but my stomach reminded me of the real reason why I decided to come here at this Walmart in the first place. "Enough of this little shitty fight," I interfered in the blondes' fight and pulled both of their ears like a mother would do, "Next time I'll tie a rope to everyone's wrists and take you with me like kettle!"
"Aiiiiya! But I was by your side all the time!" Yao complained about my preposition of being turned into kettle. Well, Yao, I don't fancy having to look for everyone and almost being scared to death by some *cough* Britain*cough*.
I tightened my grip in Arthur and Francis' ears, earning groans from both, "When you start behaving like civilized people I'll stop."
"This hurts!" England complained, his eyebrows frowning in different shapes.
"Est-ce vraiment nécessaire, Rosalina? It is 'urting!" Francis started to make some inhuman noises which creeped everyone out.
"Fine." I bluntly let go of the boy's ears, receiving sighs of relief from the blondes. I glanced at Alfred, then at Ivan and then at Yao, hoping that they would help me kill Arthur and Francis, but I guess they're just a bunch of losers as well, "Let's find the Axis and Dan before I completely lose my patience with you."
Alfred crossed his arms, as he looked around, "Where's your patience, dudette? 'Cause I can't find it anywhere."
Keep calm, Rosa, it's not worth it. "Fan ta dig, jävel," I muttered under my breath as I started pushing the cart with Yao inside, this time not even making the others follow me, because really, at this point of my shopping, I couldn't care less about who was following me or not.
But for some reason, they followed me. I must be one hell of a leader! I knew it! I knew I should've been promoted to being the captain of the kid's soccer team when I was 10!
Ivan approached me in a very friendly manner, then gestured the cart's pusher, "Let me take it, товарищ." Good, another unknown word in Russian. That is really incrementing my vocabulary. I wonder what other languages I will be speaking by the end of the month. I know I'm using lots of curses in other languages.
"Thanks." I think Russia is acting a bit OOC here. Well, maybe he was only scary with people who didn't treat him right or whatever. Not that I care. Wait, I do care.
"It was a joke, Rosie." Alfred said, still smiling at me, despite my anger. Really, he is a very, very, very brave lad to keep doing that. I know I have a short temper, I know I tend to get violent, but Alfred is just pushing it too far, and I've known the man for A COUPLE OF HOURS!
"Pierdol się-" My curse in Polish was interrupted by a very unusual occurence:
A song I recognized as 'Bang Bang' from Jessie J (ft. Ariana Grande and Nikki Minaj) started playing in the direction of the video game section in a very loud volume. Are people here deaf or what? "What the bloody hell is going on?" Arthur asked to no one specifically.
"Something stupid. I just know it." I replied, walking a bit faster, in the direction of the video game section, in hope of finding Danielle (because frankly, she is the only one who would play a song as awful as this), but at the same time I wished it wasn't her. Please tell me that it doesn't involve Danielle, please not Danielle or the Axis…
Russia was following me with China, pushing the cart faster to keep my pace. America, England and France (the last two were already engaged in a glare battle) followed us not so long after.
We walked past some stuff for camping and other stuff I won't bother describing, until we got to the video game section. It was by far Danielle's favorite section of any kind of store, and of course, after finishing buying whatever Feliciano needed for pasta, she would come here.
There were some sample radios lying around in some stands and a tryout for the game Just Dance 2015 in a huge TV, and guess who was rocking the moves? Yeah, Danielle and Feliciano. But one question remains, how did she manage to convince Kiku to join the dance too? They were getting everything right! And the moves were great, I'll have to admit. There were even other people (beside a very pissed off looking Ludwig) staring at their dancing! I looked at Luddy, and he held three shopping carts filled up with many goodies while he watched Italy, Japan and Dan dance.
The music was loud, and it was infuriating. I stopped walking as I got to Germany's side, and the others followed me too. I couldn't stop thinking about Francis as he stared at Danielle's butt as she danced. Pervert.
Something about a minute later, I was sick of dancing and music, but luckily, the music had stopped and the trio eased to dance, "OI! What are you even doing?"
"Veeee~, nothing, Generale Rosalina! Just-a dancing!" For some reason, I liked the nickname. It matches my awesomeness and badass-ity. I know I'm a complex character, "Don't you like-a to dance?"
"Lina doesn't like to dance, she always ends up looking like a shaking tree during an earthquake." Dan joined in without being invited, but if you must know, I used to dance ballet back in the day, but now I can't even try to, because I'll break my legs. Danielle then waved at the people who were watching them dance as the TV displayed the final results of the game: Dan was in first, Feliciano in second and Kiku in third. I did expect that, for Dany is one of the best dancers I know (she practices Just Dance in my X-Box at least three times a day), but I guess that dancing in the closing scene of The Beautiful World was worth it, right?
"I told them it vas a stupid idea…" Ludwig facepalmed. Yao, Alfred and Arthur started to stare suspiciously at the two carts near the German.
"It's okay," I smiled at the angry German. Dan was also smiling, but she was extremely happy for some reason or other. Feliciano was happy as well, and he was chatting happily with Yao and Kiku. I decided to play a bit with good ol' Luddy, since he looks kinda gloomy, "If I could I would give you two medals, one for trying to control other's stupidity (trust me, I know that feel, man) and another in case you lose the first."
I felt proud of myself, but Luddy didn't even chuckle (Alfred and Iggy, on the other hand, were laughing their asses off, while Francis was catcalling some passing woman), "Danke, I guess."
I shrugged and decided to check what really was inside the carts. In the one Luddy was leaning against had an absurd amount of potatoes, cabbage and sausages, as well as some other condiments and flavor foodies (I call garlic, onion and other stuff such as these 'flavor foodies' because when used, they bring special taste to the dishes. When I eat stuff with flavor foodies I remember my grandma's food back in the day, like paella or gazpacho [my last name came from Spain!]). There were also some sodas, which I was grateful for (Danielle takes the philosophy that my house is her second home really seriously, because she always knows what is running short and she buys it).
The other cart nearby had fish, eggs, rice and some other stuff I couldn't identify. It was white and looked like some sort of chewable candy. Why the hell would someone need that? It's weird and kinda ew too! Well, as Iggy said when I refused to have his scones 'Don't say 'EW' before you try!' Oh well, what damage could come from it anyway? Food poisoning? I've had worse. Dan's cooking once made me have to go to the hospital with some pretty bad stomach-something.
The last cart had something like 20 L of ice cream with different flavors and some stuff I recognized as Mediterranean ingredients. I absolutely adore olives and olive oil! It literally screams my name! Also, there was flour, eggs and some other stuff, as well as LOTS AND LOTS OF TOMATOES! Really? That much? It was something like one hundred tomatoes! If there are tomatoes involved, I can conclude that this is probably Feliciano's cart, while the one with potatoes (potato bastard) was Luddy's and the one with the white stuff I couldn't identify was Kiku's... but why? Feliciano was the one doing the cooking today, only if...they will cook for me too? OMG!
While I was poking around the foods inside the shopping carts I could hear Alfred exclaiming obnoxiously at Danielle, when he noticed she had set a new high score in the game, "Duuuudetteee! You totally rocked those moves!"
"Indeed, ma-chérie! I would buy all of your DVD's if you were an actress." Francis is getting a bit over the top with those innuendos. It's best for me to keep an eye on him.
"Veee~ I would buy them too, bella!" Feliciano appeared to be quite jealous while the other boys flirted with Danny girl. The Italian glared at the others.
"Yay, so everyone would buy Dan's DVD's." I muttered as I poked some chocolate bars and gummy bears I found under a sack of potatoes. That is Danielle's doing, I'm sure. She knows I love gummy bears. I wish I were nice as Dan... Maybe I would have more friends, and the nights when my father wasn't home wouldn't feel so lonely.
The giant Russian apparently noticed my over-sarcasm, "Подсолнечник, are you having trouble with anything?"
"No, Ivan. It's cool." Well, there's no time for lamenting for stuff, let's not be distracted from my main goal in life: Eating.
Meanwhile I was having a mid-life crisis, Danielle and Feliciano were poking around inside the shopping cart where Yao was. Danielle was like 'WOOOOOW LOOK AT THIS FEEEEELIIII~' and Feliciano was emitting soft 'Veee~ Look at this, Germany!' at stuff, until Dany turned to me, holding a bar of soap, "Wow! Look at all those things you have, Lina!"
Feliciano took out from the cart an Italian flag towel, "Vee~ really! They will be very a-useful while we are with you!"
"I can't express how thankful we are, Rosalina-chan." Kiku bowed at me. Well, we can never have enough of politeness, right?
"Aww, don't be! Remember, it was me who invited you in!" Japan always seem to flatter me with his politeness! I saw even Luddy smiling! That's so cute, don't you think? Being a good Samaritan always pays back!
France decided to enter the conversation, by honhonhon-ing first, "Oh ma-chérie! If you ever feel like receiving a gift, feel free to contact the gorgeous me."
I waved my hand at the blond French, "Don't worry, I'll not need it." Wallflowers for life! As I said that, I noticed Alfred smelling some fish from Kiku's cart suspiciously. Ivan never left my side, but he now seemed a bit curious about the white thingy in Kiku's cart too, "So, tell me, what exactly we have got here?"
"We've taken the liberty to buy things to cook you some of our country's cuisine, if that is alright with you, of course." Japan replied. Aww! They are so cute! They're gonna cook for me!
"Ve thought it vould be a nice vay to thank you." Ludwig agreed.
"Hell, I'm glad I'll not have to eat only Cup Noodles for a month." I chuckled. Well, I'm pretty skinny, and even if I weren't, good food is never a subject of complain. Yao glanced at me and giggled lightly. I'll not even bother replying to that.
"Veeeeeee!~ I have tomatoes, some rosemary, tomatoes, basil, onions, garlic, tomatoes, flour, eggs, tomatoes and ice-cream!" Feliciano exclaimed in happiness, as he and Dan high-fived. There was a wave of facepalms from everyone else.
"Because a life without ice-cream is an incomplete life." Danielle added. I'll have to agree to this observation.
"That stupidly huge amount of tomatoes is really necessary, aru?" Yao wondered, now being genuinely annoyed at the huge amount of food we would have to squeeze inside my dad's car.
"Si!" Feliciano assured. Well, what else can go wrong when you have an Italian and a bunch of tomatoes?
Pretty much everything.
"I'm sorry, Rosalina-chan, for buying so many things with your money." Kiku started, "We want to show how grateful we are by cooking for you, and since we are in such a large group, we had to buy more things."
"But I promise ve'll pay everything you might need back to you, Rosalina." Luddy joined in. Aw, the Axis are so cute! "Even if I have to pay everything mein-self."
"Nah, do not worry." I waved my hand once again. I'm really pleased with myself for not going nuts until now. Seriously, I've endured the Allies' madness for a long time without even being paid with candy for it!
"Hey, hey, Lina! I got some candy for us! Like more ice-cream, bubble gum, chocolate and everything you love!" Danielle looked around in Feliciano's shopping cart, and magically pulled out a HUGE sack of jellybeans from under- guess what- some tomatoes. I raised an eyebrow at her big smile and the fact that her usual single braid over her left shoulder was messed up (she would never let it mess up), "Tah-dah! Jellybeans!" Everyone stared as she then handed the colorful extra-large pack to Kiku, who was looking at it with curious eyes.
"They are so colorful," He said as he examined the pack carefully. It was so big that Japan's tiny hands had some difficulty in managing the material, "and artificial."
Alfred violently took the pack from Kiku's hands and was now salivating with the sight of artificially colored jellybeans, "Buuuut Japan duuude! But they're so yummy!"
"Is this everything? Can we go home now?" Iggy wondered. Wow, you're calling my house their home? This is every Hetalia fangirl's dream! I LIVE WITH THE NATIONS! I FINALLY HAVE LOTS OF UNDERLINGS!
Stop, Rosalina. Just stop. Are you forgetting that you are starving?
"Pourquoi ne pas mourir, Angleterre ?" France added. Thankfully nobody was paying attention to him, and if they were, they didn't understand what the blonde had said. I'm not very good with Latin languages, but I'll use my best guess : He was cursing Iggy.
"We could get some nice clothes for our new friends!" Danielle jumped up, hugging an uncomfortable looking Japan in the process, "I didn't like the looks people were shooting them because of those unfashionable clothes."
" 'ow could you, ma-chérie? My clothes are the most exquisite ever!" France took one of his hands and placed it on his heart, in an overdramatic way. I thought he was going to pass out. Yao rolled his eyes dramatically.
"Dan, we can buy clothes later on, because I don't have enough patience to do so. You see, some people decided to explore the store and I had to look for them!" I crossed my arms and kicked the cart closest to Ludwig.
I instantly regretted my decision of kicking the shopping cart for two reasons: One, my foot is now hurting like hell, and two, because of this little comment from our beloved American,
"Come on, Rosie! It's not like anyone got lost or anything!"
"You're right, Alfie. The good thing is that nobody got lost." I said sarcastically, as I leaned on Russia to be able to hold my balance and evaluate my hurting foot. Surprisingly, Ivan didn't do anything against it, which is rather suspicious. Anyway, my big toe is a bit red from my little fit of rage. Oh well, what can we learn about this? Never leave your house wearing flip-flops and then decide to kick some metal, "Either way, I'm freaking starving, and in case you've forgotten, I've not been fed yet."
"And what's that for me?" The last phrase was followed by a very obnoxious laugh. Can you believe that I'm actually Alfred's citizen? I don't think they know that they don't represent the countries here anyway, since they're from an anime and yada yada…
"Just be quiet Alfred, geez!"
"Yeah Alfie! You should listen to Lina! She's a very smart girl!" Since we're talking about Danielle, I know that line wasn't sarcastic at all. "Okay! So, we don't need anything else?"
"Nein, ve are done." Luddy replied.
"I think we just need to go pay for all of this now, aru." Yao added, now impatiently playing with his sleeves. Alfred was still enchanted with the jellybeans, and Arthur was with the strange stuff inside Luddy's and Kiku's carts. Francis was in lala land and Ivan was-as usual-smiling at stuff as he stood behind me.
And by 'we' you mean 'me', I thought, fighting hard on keeping my little sarcastic tongue inside my mouth, "Good, let's take this 1000 kg of food to the cashier and hope they don't judge us too much." I said as I gripped in Yao's cart pusher, and began to walk towards the check-out area to effectively make the payment for the food. Well, food is something I won't need to explain to Father, because he is aware of my inhuman eating habits and that I will eventually buy tons of food and candy. Other stuff such as 'why one earth do I have eight strangers in my house' will be harder to explain, but what the eyes can't see the heart can't feel, right?
"If they be judging us, I will be introducing them to Mr. Pipe, дa?" Ivan offered, as he started walking by my side, smiling from ear to ear.
I chuckled, glancing behind to see if the other nations were following the leader (that's me, in case you haven't figured that out yet), "I'll not stop you." All the others were following me, Dany and Feliciano (while pushing his own cart, that appeared to be quite heavy for our favorite Italian) were discussing what was better, pizza or pasta (as Luddy, behind them, facepalmed). Arthur and Francis were fighting again over something or other as Alfred laughed obnoxiously at them. Yao was expressing his annoyance about how he had been mistaken for the opposite gender by a little girl to Kiku.
I'm glad there are no Walmart employees around at the moment, because they would laugh, judge and post pictures on Facebook of my hommies, and I would not tolerate that kind of behavior.
We walked some more until we got to the 'maze' that lead to the check-out area, and just as I expected, there was only JUST ONE cashier working, and because of that, there was a FREAKING HUGE line to it. What could I say? It's almost 1 PM, which means lunch period for some and a shift switch for the others, and attendants tend to get grumpy.
"This scene seems avfully familiar." Ludwig observed, feeling quite annoyed at the weird looks people at our front were shooting us. I mean, who wouldn't? There were eight young men wearing strange clothes (worth pointing out that one of them was seating inside the shopping cart's seat made for children), two random girls and a bunch of food. Totally normal, I see stuff like this every day.
Ivan put a hand on my shoulder, making me face him, as we finally stopped at the line. I made a face at the sight of his large gloved hand in contact with my shoulder (can you blame me? I hate when people touch me, I don't know why, but I just don't), however, the Russian didn't seem to notice my discomfort, "People here seem to be being kind of…how can I be saying it? Ленивый?" He frowned his almost invisible eyebrows in confusion, "Oh дa, lazy?"
I carefully removed his gloved hand from my shoulder, "I don't like being touched, nothing personal" Apparently, the Russian didn't care (at least that's what I prefer to believe), and continued smiling. Anyhow, now I get it. Everyone's getting annoyed at the laziness. Well, I am pretty pissed at the lack of efficiency from the staff of this establishment. It's not like this in normal work hours, not that I've been so many times here before, I normally order my stuff from the internet (yeah, I'm just that fancy). But hey, at least the stereos are not playing One Direction, "It's because it's the shift swap for lunch, and the people who stay longer hours without eating while the others are out tend to become grumpy."
"Will they be needing a special incentive from Mr. Pipe?"
"Maybe another time, they're just lazy, as you said it." I explained to the Russian, as we took a step in the line, inside the 'maze'.
The 'maze' in which we were was filled with goodies, and the best part was that we didn't have to look for them this time. It was an awesome marketing idea, because it tempts you to buy more stuff, as demonstrated in the following sentences,
"Can I have some diet coke?" Alfred asked, as he shoved a can into my face.
I pushed it off then replied, annoyed, "No."
"Can I have this super nice pillow?" It was Arthur now.
"Okay, drop it inside." I sighted, defeated. Another pillow wouldn't hurt, right? Not that I'm planning on lending my pillows to them, but I have lots of space at home. There's my father's bedroom, two sofas (not normal sofas, the kind of sofa that turns into a bed) and some spare futon-stuff.
"Yaaaaay~"
"Veee~ Can I buy those snacks?" Enough of food, Feliciano.
"No."
"Can I have those Milka Chocolate bars?" Danielle, for goodness' sake!
"Don't you have those already?"
"Oh, that's true." I'll let Dany have fun with Feliciano's wild curl, that's going to be hilarious.
"Can I have some wine?" Francis joined in, showing me a bottle of wine he conjured from midair (actually, I don't want to know from where he took that out…something tells me that it was from his pants…).
"Haven't we discussed that already?" I crossed my arms, taking another step into the line.
"Non." Francis replied in the most tranquil voice ever, shoving the bottle on my face, "Please, ma-chérie!"
"Francis, I said no!" I spat out, violently taking the bottle off his hands. I'm getting real tired of shopping…Hell, I feel like I'm slowly losing my money and my mind, "And besides, if I agreed (even if we don't get arrested for buying alcohol for underage people), I would have to buy beer for Luddy and vodka for Ivan too!"
"Pourquoi ne puis-je avoir un peu de vin? Il est pas comme je vais prendre tout le monde en état d'ébriété et de viol en vue !" France seemed to get a bit pissed at me, for he crossed his arms and 'swooshed' his hair in a very majestic way. I could hear some women closeby gasping at the sight.
I looked around and noticed that all the women were now staring, and the men were rolling their eyes, "Francis, people are staring…" I said, between my teeth and forced smile, as I hid the bottle of wine behind some low price jeans scattered in the maze. The other nations started to get curious about the unknown sounds coming from people in our front.
The Frenchman looked around, and blew some kissed at the excited women, "Et? Qu'ils regardent la superbe moi!"
"Jetzt können sie kreuzen die grenzen, Francis." Why does German always sound so...uh...angry? In this specific case, however, Mr. Doitzu is a bit pissed. Can you blame him? This is going to be a tough time.
"Voglio un po 'di vino troppo, se si sta offrendo!" Feliciano joined in from some positions behind me, now smiling and with his eyes wide open.
I felt frustrated on not understanding what people say. I turned around to face the Italian, "What on earth are you even talking about?"
"Я хотел жил здесь..." Oh dear God! I can't even...
"¡Yay! ¡Vamos a hablar cosas raras en otros idiomas! A mi me gusta mucho, ¿y a ti, Lina, no te gusta?" Why everyone needs to do this? Even Danielle! Uh.. The only things I could get from what she said was: 'speak'...something something... 'languages'...something something and my name. As I said, all the Spanish I know comes from Dora the Explorer.
"Okay, guys, this is getting ridiculous." I facepalmed, as I felt different eyes on me and the nations. Probably those people who were already staring at Francis' sexiness the other's weirdness and my awesomeness.
"Nǐmen dōu tài bù chéngshúle!" Wow, Yao, bless you. That was a very disturbing sneeze.
I almost kicked something in fury, "Merda." I don't remember when stuff started to become crazy...oh yes, when France asked for wine...
"Rosalina!" Danielle scolded, apparently recognizing my previous word as a curse.
"Yada yada." I sticked my tongue at her in annoyance. I swear all the time, Dan should have grown used to it by now.
"Rosie, it's our turn!" Alfred pointed out, as soon as he finished laughing at the general mess. I noticed that the people in our front in the line had made space for us to go through. Yay, Francis is useful, after all!
"The Lord be praised!" I raised my hands to ceiling, then started to push the shopping cart with Yao towards the cashier, "Come on!"
We passed through the small open space between the other people in line and the stands of goodies that composed the maze. I could hear faint 'Merci's' from a happy Francis, some 'Arigatō's' from Kiku and some 'Scusami' from Feliciano. As I passed the people, they shot me weird glares, but the glares they shot me weren't nearly as judgmental as the ones they were shooting Ivan. I normally wouldn't give a damn, but these people are annoying me with their judgment (not that I'm not a judgmental bitch myself, but I hate when it's done to someone I like), "What's the matter? Never seen a Russian before?" I glared at (like a boss) no one specifically, as I walked away (also like a boss).
When we finally passed safely through the crowd of people, we arrived at the only cashier available, where a sole fat woman was doing her nails before almost falling down from her spinning chair at the sight of Ivan. She was wearing the traditional Walmart uniform, but something about her called my attention, she had a pair of giant earrings with the following words written in a silver color: 'TRUST NO BITCH'.
I'm serious.
That's what was written in her earrings. I had to control myself not to laugh. The only words I was able to say quietly were, "Francis, show us what you can do to win discounts." Sure, the cashier was ugly as hell, but hey, we're talking about the country of romance after all.
"Bonjour, mademoiselle!" Francis greeted seductively, and now started to chat with the woman, as Ivan helped (more like threw) Yao out of the shopping cart. The Chinese stretched his legs and started helping Ivan and I to put the stuff in the counter, so that the woman could scan the products. Britain was glaring at some weird stuff far away, America wasn't paying attention to anything other than the conversation France was having, Japan, Germany, Italy and Dan were waiting a little behind with their shopping carts, and were now chatting as well.
I think Francis couldn't manage to make the cashier fall for his looks. Well, she can't trust no bitch, after all, "Watch your mouth, white boy!" She snapped, pushing Francis' face aside.
"Ilest pas ma faute que les gens ici ne semblent pas apprécier le Pays de Romance! The Frenchman felt rather hurt by that, for he hid behind England (when I say they love each other [sexually], I mean it) like a cowardly baby.
The fat cashier rolled her eyes, but suddenly found her attention captured in the huge amount of different stuff we placed on her counter. She was now probably judging us as she began to scan the products.
I hummed nervously to myself as I noticed we were almost done with the shopping frenzy. I had never been so relieve before. I didn't even mind when I heard Iggy's annoyed squeal when Francy-pants was probably molesting him.
As the last item that once was in my cart was scanned by the cashier, she looked up at me and said in the most uninterested voice ever, "That's a total of…87,76 dollars."
Before I could say anything, Iggy did it for me, "Uh, we're not done yet, ma'am." He then gestured the Axis' carts.
"Ciaaaaaoo~!" Feliciano waved at the cashier as she glanced at them.
"Holy shit." The woman cursed as she noticed that there were three other full carts to scan, and she probably wished she were having lunch at the nearby Subway or whatever.
I turned to France and England, who were now verbally insulting each other (again) "Francis, Arthur, do something useful and pack the stuff for me." I asked. Not asked, most like ordered.
It indeed took some time for the cashier to scan everything. The nations were getting impatient, most notably America, who was now whining about being hungry and so on, "Seriously kid, how many people are you going to feed with all of this?" The fat cashier asked, being very impolite for my taste.
"Uh, only us." I answered, looking around. Now the nations had already packed the stuff up and were only waiting for me to pay for our stuff and then head back home.
"Make sure you eat a lot, you sure need it," She suggested pointing at my belly. I glanced down at my chest and belly and concluded: Yup. I definitely need to eat more, but really, I've been on a Cup Noodles diet for some time now, because I can't cook at all, "Anyway, the new total is 345,87."
Dad's gonna kill me when he sees what I have been purchasing with his credit card while he's away….But it's for a good cause, right? It's not every day that so many things happen in a time span of one day, like, slamming a frying pan into a French's face, passing out, meeting personifications of nations, inviting them to live with me, almost killing Alfred a couple of times, scolding Francis and Arthur… Yeah, I like to think of myself as a lucky girl.
I pulled out the shinning black credit card from my pocket, and just as I was about to hand it to the cashier, Danielle interrupted me, "Oh! Wait, Lina! I might have some discount coupons somewhere inside my purse! Just a second!" She then started to look inside her straw purse, grumbling stuff like 'I have to be more organized' and 'Oh look! The opened pack of skittles I forgot to eat last month!' The other people in the line to the cashier were now getting very impatient, and I can't blame them too much. For some good five minutes, Dany looked around inside the purse with no success (really, what does she have inside that? It can't be that big, can it?), she eventually pulled out a bundle of discount coupons and handed it to the cashier, "There!"
HOW.
Just 'how'.
Better not argue…and speaking of arguing, that's what Francis and Arthur are doing right now. "The total now is 284,22." The cashier sighed.
I quickly gave her my credit card, hoping not to be interrupted again, because really, I'm getting very annoyed at this, but okay. I inserted my credit card password, which is definitely not 1234.
With a sigh of relief, I conducted myself to the exit of the supermarket, now smiling as I passed by the puzzled nations who had the sense of, at least carrying the plastic shopping bags before getting rid of the shopping carts, "Come on, guys! It's finally over!"
"Go, dudette!" Alfred quickly followed me out of the Walmart, passing through the automatic door (and almost bumping into the glass), while holding some shopping bags.
"Wait, you wanker!" I could hear Arthur from a distance, as I happily skipped through the parking lot, until I finally arrived at where my car was parked. The weather outside was still sizzling hot, and it was a shock of temperature when my skin first was exposed to the heat. I had been under an air conditioning for a long time inside the Walmart, and now, I'm under this boiling hot sun.
It took some time for the other nations to gather around, after all, I came running and weren't carrying anything…Oh well, that was pretty stupid of me, but hey, now I can delete all those snapchats from my phone!
"Uh, dudette, how are we going to fit inside the car with all of these bags?" Alfred asked, as I unlocked the car.
I smiled, "You'll have to get squeezed in the back," I didn't wait to hear Francis' probably dirty reply to that, "Let's shove all of those bags inside."
Germany and Russia did all the work of putting the stuff inside the car (thank goodness, because I was soooo not doing it), and now it was finally time to head back home. "Hurry guys, we don't have all day, all that ice-cream will melt if we take too long."
"You heard Lina, come in Luddy, Kiku and Feliiiii~" Danielle said in a sing-song voice as she shoved the Axis inside the car, in the furthest seat, before entering the car herself. I watched in amusement as Ludwig complained that Feliciano was almost seating in his lap, "I just loooove being close to you guys~!"
"Veee~ We like being-a close to you too, bella!~" The Italian replied. I know I should get used to this, but it won't be less weird.
I stared at the Allies from outside the driver's seat, "What are you waiting for?"
"I will seat by your side at the front! 'Cause I can't let you get lost again, dudette, 'cause that's what we heroes do!" Alfred opened the door to the passenger's seat but was interrupted by a voice in a thick Russian accent,
"I will be seating with Подсолнечник, дa?" The Russian's smile only grew as the American's face grew paler. Because Alfred didn't make an attempt to take his hands off the car's doorknob, Ivan added, "Mr. Pipe would be happy to be breaking your toes if you do not be seating in the back."
"Geez, okay! Move it Commie!" Alfred finally gave up, not before muttering a very low 'Good luck with him, Rosie' to me. Oh well, I don't think Ivan would do such bad things with me, right?
I sighed and entered the car, while the chaos was still going on outside. Ivan calmly seated beside me, holding his bouquet of sunflowers then he smiled cheekily at me, and then at the quarrelling nations still outside, fighting to decide where to seat.
"Come on wine addict, I want to seat by the window!"
"QUOI? I want to seat behind mademoiselle Rosalina!"
"There are TWO window seats, aru!"
"But only one is not directly behind the Commie!"
I glanced at the rearview mirror, meeting my gaze with Germany's in the furthest seat. Then I had an idea. I turned on the car, making the four remaining nations jump up in fright, "How about I just leave you guys here?" I said with a wicked smile that rivaled Russia's when he kol-s.
In a blink of an eye, the four nations entered the car. France in the left window seat (right behind me, which I didn't like very much), America beside him, then England and finally China behind Russia.
Can I say that I have magical powers?
Probably no, because the last time magic was among those people, they ended up at my humble home.
So I started to drive off the Walmart. I can't say I'm looking forward to my next visit while housing the nations, because the last time I checked money did not grow in trees, and I just spent almost 300 dollars in food. I wonder how I'll explain that. Or better, how I will explain all of this. Let's not think about it…for now…
I noticed that the nations were unusually calm. Even Dan was quiet. Well, that didn't last much, because as I drove in the freeway, Alfred started,
"Hey Francy-pants, dude! How'd you manage to pick up so many chicks earlier?"
"Ohonhonhon~ Silly America! It's called natural talent," Francis replied, "Something you lack."
"Hey! I can pick up chicks too!" Alfred contested, "Tell him, Iggy! Tell him I can pick up chicks too!"
"DO I LOOK LIKE A GIRL TO YOU, BLOODY WANKER?!" I almost peed in my pants while laughing Arthur's priceless response. I could even hear Ivan chuckling lightly, and even Yao laughing. From the rearview, I saw Ludwig facepalming, as Dan, Kiku and Feli started playing I spy.
Now that I'm thinking about it, I can almost pretend we're a family. One big and noisy family. I like that thought, of being part of a huge loving family, because, just like Russia, I hate being alone (yeah, but I hate even more when out at some public place and I'm all 'eww, don't touch me, peasant!'). Maybe someday I'll not have to pretend they're my family.
Interrupting me from my thoughts, Alfred came up with an idea, "Rosie, Rosie, turn on the radio!"
"Ivan, can you please do it for me?" I quickly glanced at the Russian, who nodded and started pressing random buttons, until he eventually found the right one, but the awful song named 'One Thing' started playing from the radio burned my eardrums (people on the radio don't know that this song is kinda old?), "No, I refuse to listen to that." I said as I turned the radio off.
"Let me play a song in my phone, then~" Danielle suggested, "I think it fits our circumstances!"
"Play 'Stereotypes Song' and I'm leaving you in the road." I frowned. As much as that song is kinda nice, it's not the best time to play it. The countries could find it offensive. Oh well,
But instead of 'Stereotypes Song', a nice little dance track started to play,
Shining star
Ring me, ring me, ring me, ring me right now
You ring me right now
You ring me right now
Shining star
Ring me, ring me, ring me, ring me right now
You ring me right now
You ring me right now ( a/n: the original song is called Shining Star and is sung by Inna)
I noticed what it really was, a ringtone version of the song 'Shining Star', which, is in fact my ringtone, "Crap, it's my phone." CRAP MY PHONE IS RINGING! AND I'M DRIVING, "ANYONE ANSWER BECAUSE I'M DRIVING!" I threw my phone into the back seat, without losing my cool (if you think that by yelling I am close to snapping, you're terribly wrong, buddy), hopefully someone in the back will catch it, "NO LITTLE TRICKS, IT CAN BE SERIOUS SHIT!"
"Hello, you just reached Rosalina, may I help you?" I felt relieved when my phone stopped ringing and a British accented voice picked it up. "No, I'm not Rosalina, you silly, do I sound like a woman to you?" The British man continued to talk, now a bit angry at whomever is at the phone. I just hope it's not my father, "There is no need to shout in whatever language you're shouting…Who is this?" The other nations looked at him with puzzled expressions. Even myself. Shouting in different languages is it? I might just know who's at the other side, "You want to talk to her? Hold on just a second, please." From the rearview mirror, I could see England holding the phone, to prevent the other people at the other side of the line from hearing us, "It's a girl called Caitlyn (who yells a lot, apparently), should I continue talking or turn off the phone at her face?"
"Dude, turn it off! It'll be hilarious!" You can guess who suggested that.
"No, Alfred. Don't be immature." I sighed.
"Do you knowings this person at the phone?" Ivan questioned.
"That's Cat, our friend!" Danielle answered. Well, the nations finding out about her would only be a matter of time, because Cat is almost every day at my house.
"Is she a trustable friend?" Ludwig asked.
"Of course she is." Haha, she's even more trustable than me. I mean it like, really.
"Does she know about us?" Japan wondered.
"I'm afraid she doesn't." In details of course, and I didn't mention that I was housing Hetalia when we texted. I only mentioned I was having trouble with guests, but as far as Cat's imagination goes, she could think that the Narnia kids were at my house (now that I think about it, it's not that impossible with Iggy's suckish magic), "Ask her where she is, Iggy."
"Don't call me that bloody nickname!" The British complained before picking up the phone again, "Hello? Ms. Caitlyn? Are you still there? Good, Rosalina would like to know where you are." I could see that the other nations were as curious as I was to know what was happening in the other side of the phone line, "You're at her house? How interesting. How did you manage to get in?" It's getting difficult to pay attention in the road with all this suspense, "How is that none of my business? You're not being a lady at all! Stop speaking the bloody frog's language!"
"Arthur!" Danielle scolded from the back seat.
"How easy it is to enter your house, aru?" Yao, this is very immature of you to ask.
"She probably has a key." I replied, "Anyway, tell her I'm driving outta crazytown and soon will be home…and tell her not to fear being alone at home."
The Englishman nodded, "Rosalina is currently 'driving outta crazytown' and we'll be home soon." From the rearview mirror I saw Arthur frowning his big bushy eyebrows, "Yes, love, we'll be home soon. Rosa also hopes you won't be scared of being at her house alone." I saw Russia shifting in his seat, to be able to catch a glimpse of the others behind us, "What? You're not alone? Who else is there? Who are you speaking French to?"
I pressed the break in the car so strongly and unexpectedly that Alfred's face almost encountered the front window, in fact, everyone almost bumped into the front seat. "Sorry guys." I muttered, as I continued to drive normally. I'm fucked, I'm fucked…
Arthur continued talking. I'm sure him and Cat will be best buddies, "None of my business? Maybe it isn't, but it is certainly Rosalina's! What? Who am I? Well, my love, that's none of your business."
With that, the British angrily shut down the phone and handed it to me.
"Puta que pariu, Arthur!" I cursed, annoyed at the way the blond boy ended the conversation with Cat.
"She was being ungracious!" I narrowed my eyes. "She even cursed!"
"Ugh, as soon as we get home you'll apologize."
"Only if the person who's there with her doesn't kill everyone first, aru." Yao, why do you need to always be the pessimist here? Everyone knows that's my job.
"What? She was the one being rude!" The British continued to argue. I rolled my eyes, I'm sooo going to murder people if those wankers continue to argue…
"Shut the 'ell up, Britain!" Francis joined in, "You are being very annoying right now!"
"You frog! I'm just trying to be serious over here! The other girl in the phone line made it clear that she wasn't alone! She was even speaking French! I'm just worried what people in America are able to do!" England continued, ignoring Alfred's comment of 'HERE IN AMERICA WE KICK LOTS OF ASS!', "Although, the girl…she didn't seem scared or anything, on the contrary…Do you happen to have any idea of who it might be in your house, Rosalina?"
"Hell, I don't." I really don't know. You may be thinking that my house is disorganized because, apparently, half of the world holds a key to my house, but that's not true. Wait a second there…Cat's speaking French? To someone else? Who the fuck is at home right now with her?
"Vho else has zee key to your house?" Ludwig asked. If Iggy brought the Axis and the Allies here, I might have an idea of who it might be…
"No one."
I successfully avoided further discussion on the topic of 'Stranger Danger in my house', because at that instant I spotted the building where my apartment is. With a sigh of relief, I parked the car inside the big garage and unlocked the doors. "So, guys, we're here."
"I'm glad we didn't crash." Japan sighed in relief.
"Why? Don't like my mad driving skillz?" I turned around to face the people in the back, while still inside the car and with my seat belt on.
"No, no! I didn't mean it like that!" The Japanese seemed to be very serious about his 'apologies'.
"Calm down, Kiku. Lina's just irritated because she's hungry that's all…" Dan comforted the Asian boy by patting his head lightly.
"Aw, fuck." I cursed under my breath, as I turned back to face the front and noticed that a certain yellow New Beatle wasn't parked at the spot in my front. The ridiculous yellow New Beatle belongs to no one other than my wicked neighbor, Ms. Long, which was not parked at the moment.
Her car was not in the garage. I know her car, but it's not like I stalk the woman. It's more like anti-stalking, when you learn someone's routine to systematically avoid them.
I felt strangely happy about the idea that Ms. Long wasn't going to annoy me, at least for now. That's our chance of going up to the 10th floor (which is where my apartment is) and fucking kill whomever is with Cat. "Come on, dudes, we got to go now."
"Veee~ I am going to a-cook pasta for my new friends and my old ones!" Feliciano cheered, once everyone was finally out of the car. I locked it with my keys and progressed to lead the nations to the elevator. And of course, as I said before, they're carrying all the shopping bags for me, therefore being my slaves, because as I said, there's no fat under those military clothes (I read the last two words in Francis' voice for some reason).
"Dude, everyone's not going to fit in." Alfred observed as the elevator arrived at the garage and I opened the door.
"Thanks for the update, Captain Obvious." I smiled sarcastically. I was happy with myself that I did not curse in any language at the obvious statement made by Alfie.
Thank you very much that Danielle (who was not carrying any shopping bags, but unlike me, she didn't refuse to) solved our problem, "I'll can stay back with my new friends, right Luddy, Kiku and Feli?"
"Do I have a choice?" Ludwig sighed, under Danielle's tight hug along with Kiku and Feliciano.
"Nope!" The brunette replied. Her hair was now re-tied in a simple single braid over her left shoulder, "Bye bye! Be careful with Cat and the French stranger!"
Dan waived at us as the elevator's doors closed after I pushed the 10th floor button. It was rather uncomfortable to be squeezed inside an elevator with other people, but I decided not to get into that, "Okay, guys, plan time."
"Who put you in charge, dudette?" America asked, annoyed, as he was being squeezed by a smiling Russia who stared at me.
"I did. Any objections?"
"I do-" I cut the American off before I snapped.
"Die, Alfred." Hahaha, I'm such a delicate girl, "Anyway, as Ivan has a pipe, he'll go first, and will beat up the stranger if need be, дa?"
"Дa." The Slav agreed, his smile widening, "I'll just imagine it is little Alfred's skull."
"Ivan!"
"Мне жаль ... Sorry…" The Russian muttered. If I weren't so stuffed here in this elevator, I would be laughing my ass off at Alfred's scared expression.
"Ma-chérie, tell me, is your other friend pretty too?" France asked. Hell, why is this elevator taking forever to get all the way up?
"She is, Francis, but I'll not let you touch her."
"Why? You don't like l'amour?" I sighed.
However, gladly for me, the elevator's doors opened at that instant, "Ooops, we are here."
"Thank goodness, aru."
We quickly got out of the elevator and followed the little bright white hallway between my apartment and my neighbor's, until we got to my doorstep. Before I could unlock the door, Arthur rushed to my side and pressed his left ear in the wooden door, "What are you even doing, bro?" America asked, as everyone observed the British in that awkward position.
"Eavesdropping, you git. What does it look like?" I think he regretted asking that question, because before Alfred could open his mouth to say something irrelevant, Arthur cut him off, "Don't answer."
"What do you hear, aru?"
"All frog's language." The Englishman lifted up from his position, "My ears are bleeding."
"Je déteste me plaindre, mais Mario ne suffit d'appeler Luigi gay?" I heard a soft male voice from inside. Definitely there's someone there, and what ? Mario and Luigi ? Gay ?
"That is being French." Russia is now the new Captain Obvious. Congratulations! Calm down and accept your prize!
"Voilà ce que nous aimons à croire." Now it was a girl's voice. Certainly Caitlyn's. Her voice, despite the language difference, sounds pretty much the same, "Voir, Mathieu, qui est pourquoi Lina acheté ce jeu, pour se moquer de lui."
"Hey, I'm not an expert in French, but I understood my name, and someone's named Mathieu... " I started.
"Mattie?!" America exclaimed.
"Aiiiyaa ! He is here too, aru?"
"Who the fuck is Mattie?" I crossed my arms in annoyance.
"Pourquoi ferait-elle ça?" 'Mathieu' continued speaking. He doesn't seem menacing, and by the looks of it, the nations know him...there's only one nation who's name resembles 'Mathieu' and speaks French other than France, Seichelles and Switzerland...
"Parce qu'elle est folle, voilà pourquoi ... Je ne peux toujours pas croire que personne ne vous a remarqué! "
Fuck it all, fuck it all... I don't have paicience anymore...
I'm going to open this door right in this instant!
I pushed the nations (who had hurdled up against the door) aside and proceeded to unlock the door.
As soon as I did it, I stepped inside the house and depared myself with two different figures seating at the two sofas, playing video-games on the TV. One of them was blond and looked very suspiciously like Alfred, and was holding a CD-i controller, playing Hotel Mario.
Well, that explains the 'Mario and Luigi gay' stuff I could distinguish among the French the two were speaking. Even the crappy song could be listened.
The other was a ginger haired girl who was sprawled in the sofa, her left hand raised, holding her phone, and headphones on. There was a sack of chocolate chip cookies beside her, probably my sack of chocolate cookies she stole from my sacred heaven.
By the looks of it, Cat was probably watching some Brazilian soap operas on her phone, using my internet. I told her not to do that, because to catch the signal from miles away takes too much of my already crappy connection. I noticed that behind me, England and France started to fight, calling the two French speaking people's attention. Cat took out her headphones and just stared at me, while the blond boy turned to us and I could finally see who it was...
"Canadia, dude! We didn't see you there!" America pushed me aside and ran to his brother and crushing him in an embrace. Ruuuuuuuude!
I think it has been a loooong time since I had such an eventful day like this one.
-Yaaaay-
Translations (if they're wrong, blame Google Translate)!
Russian
Подсолнечник- (podsolnechnik) Sunflower;
Дa- (da) yes;
Товарищ- (tovarishch [a/n: this is totally my favorite word in Russian]) Comrade;
Ленивый- (lyenivyi) lazy;
Я хотел жил здесь...- (Ya rrotel zhil zdyes) I wish I lived here;
Мне жаль ...- (mnye zhal) I'm sorry...
ЧТО?- What?
French
Mes chers- my dears;
Ma-chérie- my dear;
Non-No;
Imbecilé- Imbecile;
Mademoiselle- lady;
Est-ce vraiment nécessaire, Rosalina?-Is this really necessary, Rosalina ?
Pourquoi ne pas mourir, Angleterre?-Why don't you die, England ?
Pourquoi ne puis-je avoir un peu de vin? Il est pas comme je vais prendre tout le monde en état d'ébriété et de viol en vue !- Why can't I have some wine? It's not like I'll get drunk and rape everyone!
Et? Qu'ils regardent la superbe moi!- And ? Let them stare at the gorgeous me !
Merci-Thank you;
Bonjour, mademoiselle!- Good morning, lady!
Ilest pas ma faute que les gens ici ne semblent pas apprécier le Pays de Romance! -It's not my fault that people here doesn't seem to appreciate the Country of Romance!
Quoi ?- What?
L'amour- Love;
"Je déteste me plaindre, mais Mario ne suffit d'appeler Luigi gay?"
"Voilà ce que nous aimons à croire." "Voir, Mathieu, qui est pourquoi Lina acheté ce jeu, pour se moquer de lui."
"Pourquoi ferait-elle ça?"
"Parce qu'elle est folle, voilà pourquoi ... Je ne peux toujours pas croire que personne ne vous a remarqué! "-
"I hate to complain, but did Mario call Luigi gay?"
"That's what we like to believe." "See, Matthew, that's why Lina bought this game, to make fun of it."
"Why would she do that?"
"Because she's crazy, that's why…. I still can't believe nobody noticed you!"
Portuguese
Merda- Shit;
Puta que pariu- literal translation: the bitch who had a child/context translation: Fuck!
Polish
Pierdol się- Fuck you;
Danish
Dumme mennesker- Stupid people;
Swedish
Fan ta dig, jävel- Fuck you, bastard;
German
Danke- Thank you;
Nein- No;
Jetzt können Sie kreuzen die Grenzen, Francis.- Now you are really crossing the limits, Francis.
Chinese
Nǐmen dōu tài bù chéngshúle- (你们都太不成熟了！)- You are all so immature!
Japanese
Arigatō(ありがとう)- Thank you;
Italian
Andiamo- Come on!
Si!- Yes!
Scusami- Excuse me;
Ciao!- Hello!
Generale Rosalina- General Rosalina;
Voglio un po 'di vino troppo, se si sta offrendo!- I want some wine too, if you're offering!
Bella- beautiful;
Spanish
"¡Yay! ¡Vamos a hablar cosas raras en otros idiomas! A mi me gusta mucho, ¿y a ti, Lina, no te gusta?"- Yay! Let's speak weird things in other languages! I like it a lot, don't you, Lina?
Rosalina: Hahaha, Canada was finally introduced in this huuuuuuuge chapter!
Canada: Finally.
America: Aw Canadia, we didn't know you were here too!
Canada: I was by your side all the time during the G8 conference!
America: Really?
-Next Chapter Nine Nations Are Better Than Eight sneak peak-
While I watched Francis and Arthur quarrel about something or other, I noticed Dan jumping up from her seat unexpectedly, "How about we watch some Game of Thrones?" She suggested, looking for something inside her huge purse. After some moments of grumbling, she eventually took out a DVD case with the season 1 of Game of Thrones. How?
Just, how.
That purse of hers is serious witchcraft. Maybe she stole it from Gandalf and used some spells in it. At least the magic in Dan's purse works, unlike Arthur's crappy dark magic.
"Do you randomly carry the season one of Game of Thrones in your purse?" Caitlyn asked, not even taking her eyes off her phone for a mere second. That damn soap opera really grabs Cat's attention.
"You never know when there'll be an opportunity to introduce new people to the fandom!" Danielle exclaimed, skipping to the DVD device and standing there, watching the rest of us argue/don't give a damn/laugh our asses off the situation.
I was one of the people laughing my ass off. When I returned to my true self, I said, "I don't think everyone here is capable of handling this show, Dan."
"Veee~ Is it scary?" Feliciano squealed, as he clung into Ludwig's arm in the sofa.
"No." I replied, "But hell, there's blood everywhere."
"It reminds me of the rumors I heard when Russia was housing the Baltics and his sisters!" What an unlucky comment, America.
"ЧТО?" I almost slapped Alfred across the face for making someone as cute as Ivan angry. I know he didn't torture the Baltics (that's what I prefer to believe, anyway, but I don't think he'd do such a thing).
"Aw, don't worry, guys! I'll be here to comfort you and give spoilers so that our friends don't have the chance of being caught in surprise!" Dany clapped her hands together to cause dramatic effects.
"Geeez Danielle, don't you have anything better to show us?" Caitlyn sighed, annoyed. She was now sprawled across the floor and didn't seem to care that Francis was staring at her.
"Do you mean Brazilian soap operas?" Yao joined in, much for Cat's discontentment. She finally took off her headphones and murdered the Chinese over and over with her stares.
"Hey! Those are good!"
I leaned on my chair and took a bite off a chocolate bar, watching the freak show in my house in amusement, "No, they aren't."
"Why do you take the rude Chinese's side, eh Lina?" I can see little Kitty-Cat is getting a bit angry.
Am I one of those people who likes to see the world burn?
You bet'cha.
"Who's that rude Chinese you speak of?" Yao asked, smiling as Cat's pale face turned deep red as Spain's tomatoes in anger.
-End of sneak peak-
France: Rosalina, are you lonely?
Rosalina: Uh, no.
France: You seem to need a bit of l'amour.
Rosalina: Nope. But you know I'll have to have it, right?
England: Because it's written on the summary of the story?
Rosalina: Exactly. Just commenting that this story is a Slowmance.
America: Aw, Rosie! Slowmances make me sleepy!
England: Just like the wine-guzzling cheesy-monkey's movies!
France: QUOI? Non, those are your movies, black sheep of Europe.
England and France: *fight*
Rosalina: Okay, so the chapter is over…If you enjoyed, why don't you click in the review button bellow?
Russia: You will review, дa? *waves pipe menacingly*