*For some reason the chapter was gone and I fixed it*
Authoress: I just realized this story is almost 1 year old. Woah.
France: Stories are like wine, they get better with age.
England: Quit being a creep!
France and England: *fight*
Authoress: Anyway, I'd like to thank you guys for all the support and stuff, I never thought it would get this far… And I'm glad you all are enjoying this story! And that nobody complains about my slow updates.
Rosalina: After all, the chapters are so cool it's worth the wait.
China: Definitely.
Danielle: So lets start the next one?
Rosalina: Sure!
Cat: The authoress owns nothing except the three OC's and the chaos they might end up causing.
Authoress: Enjoyyyyyyyy!
-Previously in How to live with Hetalia-
"So you are an expert on friendship." Ivan giggled, as he looked at my face.
"Nah, I just like to help." I waved my hand.
"You don't show much your soft side, дa [Russian-Yes]?"
"Neither do you." Touché. Hahahahha.
"I will have to be thanking England for cursing the scones." He said, in a very quiet tone, which enabled me from listening correctly.
"What did you say?"
"Nothing." Ivan smiled, "Я больше не один являюсь [Russian-I'm not alone anymore]."
-Reality in Rosalina's POV-
I woke up by some voices outside of the room, "Rosiiiiieeee!? Time to wake up! I need to be fed! Ugh, I might not be knocking hard enough...where's the big Commie when I need him?" Hmm? Someone's knocking on the door, but I'm not going to answer right now. Nor am I opening my eyes.
Obnoxious. Alfred for sure.
"Shut up, America, aru! She is sleeping!" Yeah, China, stop him..
"But I'm hungry!" Nobody cares, Alfred.
"Nobody cares!" Good one, England.
"Look, you guys! I-a found a neat key inside a jar of cookies! It must-a be the key to Rosa's bedroom!" I underestimated Italy. He is not as dumb as I thought.
"How do you know?" Germany asked.
"It has a keychain a-written 'Rosalina's bedroom' in it."
"That makes sense." Japan acknowledged.
"We have to open it!" America shouted. I'm sure that America has the key by now.
"America, remember what Rosa said, 'There are things American but Amerishouldn't'" Canada quoted me!? I'm so awesome.
"That should be your foreign policy, you know." France added.
"This time, American and Ameriwill!" I'm should get up and shit, but I just don't care. "Fuck da rulez!" ...and the door was unlocked. "Commie?! What are you doing? Don't hurt Rosie!"
Wait, what? Ivan is sleeping in the bed bellow mine.
"The only one I would be hurting is you, America." The Russian replied. He should be nice and shit, or did everything I said yesterday just faded?
I opened my eyes and the big Russian was lying in my bed beside me.
And to top it off, he was hugging me. I don't know if I should be madder at Alfred for interrupting my sleep or Ivan for invading my personal space after I told him to sleep bellow.
All the other nations peeked at the door, and everyone fucking saw it.
"Ivan!" I shouted, freeing myself from the Russian's arms and jumping out of the bed and crawling into the furthest reach of the room-my table with the computer-to get away from that awkward scene. "What the fuck?!" I looked up to the blond Russian with rage burning in my eyes.
"I just wanted to be with my friend at all times!" Ivan replied, as he stood up from the bed. Alfred and I exchanged suspicious glances. Yao coughed awkwardly. "Or aren't you my friend anymore?"
Dude, no. I don't like to be touched, is this such a difficult concept to gasp?
Woah, woah. "We are 'friends' and not 'friends with benefits', because clearly that social interaction hasn't been unlocked yet!" I stood up from the floor and pointed an angry finger at the Russian.
"Wow, sorry to interrupt you, we didn't know you were 'aving...humm.. some other business in here." France giggled, as he peeked into the room at the door. Everyone else except for Alfred was watching the scene from outside the room.
I had to control myself not to snap at everyone.
Calm down, Rosa. Remember what Father told you to do, take a deep breath and count to ten.
One...two...three...four...five...
Italy giggled as well, "We should-a better leave them to their privacy, no?"
I couldn't even get to six, before everyone else started talking and laughing.
"I think I will make a doujinshi of this ship." Japan commented.
FUCK! "What!? No, there's nothing going on! Keep in mind that if you make any more comments about this-this-this- inconvenience, I can kick you out at any time!" I pointed a finger at everyone while I laughed as a maniac.
"Woah, Rosie, chill, nobody will judge you *too much* for sleeping with the Commie!" America offered a hand to help me get up from the floor, but I slapped his hand instead.
Thank you very much but I'm currently mad at everyone right now to accept your 'help', 'gentleman'.
"I hate all of you!" I yelled, and quickly ran off to the kitchen, to drown myself in sweets and forget this shit ever happened.
"You motherfuckers…" I said, as I stepped in to the kitchen, and to my surprise (not really), Germany and Canada were the only ones there. I furiously sat at the table and waited for my breakfast, as I checked my phone for new messages.
"Watch your language, Rosalina." Germany scolded rather politely, as he picked up some plates from the dishwasher. Beside him at the stove, Canada made pancakes.
Despite my bad mood, the pancakes smelled deliciously.
"Like, fuck you." I muttered, not taking my eyes from my Instagram account. Guess who has 1000 followers now? That's right, Danielle has 1000 followers, I have 40.
The German sighted loudly, "I heard that, you know."
It was meant for you to hear, asshat. I thought. Seriously, that comment would make a lot of harm if said. Lucky me I could keep my little potty mouth shut.
I waited for Ludwig to set up the table for everyone and for Mattie to finish the pancakes while I scrolled over Facebook. As the table was set and the pancakes and dairy products all displayed across the table, the others started to head back to the dining room (probably because of the smell).
"I'm sorry for what happened, Rosa. Truly." Matthew, who took a seat beside me.
I looked up from my phone, "You didn't do anything, it was your stupid brother who started it all."
"Who's the stupid brother?" Alfred asked, as he sat down across me. The others also took their places, but I didn't care.
I started picking some pancakes, coffee and yoghurt. For some reason we have maple syrup, cause I don't remember buying it yesterday.
"I'm not talking to you." I waved my hand at the American, "Talk to the hand, asshole."
"Hey!" He protested.
"What you did was pretty stupid indeed, Alfred." Francis agreed. "I'm sorry for everything. We shouldn't have laughed at you."
"And?"
"For stealing your spare key." Feliciano added.
"There's more, bitches." My eyes travelled across the table, stopping at all nations.
"For invading your room while you were asleep, aru." China said.
Japan lowered his head, "For thinking about a doujinshi for your and Russia-san's ship."
"For performing the social interactions you said weren't allowed yet." Russia smiled at me. How can one be mad at this big guy?
"And for being an asshole." America added. "And to earn the forgiveness of our favorite inn girl, we organized your room for you!"
"Really? I don't believe it." I laughed.
"You should, it was Italy's idea." Britain commented.
"Well, that's a suiting making up effort. Consider your apologies accepted." I smiled. I can't believe I've just forgave those people in a blink of an eye without demanding a humiliating thing!
I never did that to my friends. Once I fought so bad with Cat that we stayed an entire month without looking at each other's general direction. Another two months without being in the same room as each other and three others not talking. I have to admit, it was my fault that we fought, but I am too proud to ask for forgiveness.
The nations smiled back and we continued eating our breakfast, with the normal chit-chat and fights between the countries.
When I was about to start eating my eighth pancake, I heard the doorbell.
"Shit! What time is it!?"
Arthur took off his pocket watch and replied, "It's 9am, Rosa. I thought you knew."
OF COURSE! My friends were going to show up here at 9 so we can go to the outlet nearby to buy clothes to those countries. No wonder why they were all dressed up already! And I'm the only one in pj-s!
When I was about to get up and answer the door, Kiku did it first. "Allow me, Rosa-chan. Finish your breakfast first."
With that, the Japanese boy stood up and walked all the way to the door, unlocked it, and of course, once the door opened, someone almost knocked him down with a hug.
"KIIIIIKUUUU! HEYYYY BOOO!" from my place at the table, I could only see a huge mass of black hair hugging Japan so tight he was struggling to breathe.
"I am delighted to see you too, Danielle-chan, but could you please let go of me?" Kiku gasped for breath.
"Sorryyyyy!" Danielle quickly let go of him, turned to the table where I was and started going towards us. Also, gracefully pulling a very annoyed Cat along with her.
The brunette was wearing a very cute pink tank top and a denim skirt, adorned with a shiny belt. She also wore a short pair of black boots. Her long black hair hung loosely all around her.
Caitlyn, on the other hand, was wearing a striped black and white polo and -for the first time I've seen in my life-a pair of black denim shorts. I'll not blame her, it's flipping hot outside.
The red haired girl sighed loudly, "L-let me guess, none of you are r-ready yet."
"We are!" Italy exclaimed.
"First of all, bitch, good morning." I rolled my eyes and gave a strong bite on a piece of my pancake.
"O-okay." She sighed again, "G-good morning, Rosalina, g-good morning, everyone else."
"Everyone else?! How daRE YOU!" America exclaimed, standing up from his seat and dropping the jar of maple syrup. "I am nOT EVERYONE ELSE! I'M THE HERO!"
Shit. I think they're going to start again. "Yeah, indeed you are not everyone else, you are worse." Britain sipped his tea.
"Fuck, Arthur, stop provoking! It's not even funny anymore!" I snapped. Ugh, I'm always the one who needs to control this place…
"N-not being ready at the a-appointed time wasn't funny at all as well." Caitlyn commented.
"And about not being ready on time," I turned to Caitlyn, "Ms. I-Am-Always-Right, but I had a little thing going on here that left me a bit late."
"She slept with Russia." America said bluntly.
"What!" I turned to Alfred, my eyes burning with rage. Seriously, how dare him? That was supposed to be a secret to everybody! First of all that it wasn't meant to happen. Second, I'd end up telling Cat and Dan one way or another.
Just…not like that.
Everyone gasped like it had been the first time they'd heard the news. Although Caitlyn and Danielle gasped so loudly that the brunette swallowed the gum she was chewing.
Then she started coughing like there was no tomorrow. It took her five minutes to stop coughing, and NO one (except Italy) had the decency of helping her.
Amount of fucks I gave: 0
When Dan finally stopped coughing, Caitlyn turned to her, "Y-you owe me 20 b-bucks."
"Fine." Danielle pulled out a 20 dollar bill surprisingly quickly from her purse, as she was immersed in the gazes of everyone else. "Here. A Lannister always pays his debts."
"You were betting?!" I raised my voice and myself from the table in anger.
Caitlyn grinned, "O-of course."
"I betted you would kiss America first, and she bet on Russia…" Danielle started. What the fuck, Danielle. WHAT THE FUCK!
Do I look like a whore to them? Cause I certainly don't (in my opinion, of course. There are some whores scattered around school that think I'm a slut)!
"WHAT!? You two bet on things that happen to me?" I asked. Surprisingly enough, I didn't mind the fact that they betted on me kissing Russia. "THAT IS TREASON." But not America though, "When did my life become so interesting?"
What the fuck did I just think about?
"Ugh, y-you know, stuff always seems to h-happen to y-you." Caitlyn reasoned, "I m-mean, look at t-this." She pointed to all nations, all of which were pretty much not caring about what we were talking about, which I'm grateful for. "A-anyway, go p-put on some c-clothes, lazy ass."
Why am I not protesting.
Why.
I've been brainwashed. Completely.
"Okay, fuck it. I'll dress up." I cleaned the sides of my mouth and threw the napkin on Alfred's head. Then I got up from the table and made my way to my room.
As I was almost at the hallway, Caitlyn sighed loudly, "T-that was s-s-so ungracious R-rosalina."
"And immature." Yao complemented.
I did a dramatic Galadriel turn and let my lil comment fly, "It wasn't me who invaded another person's bedroom." HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAH SUCK IT MOTHERFUCKING LOSERS! ROSALINA WINS AGAIN!
"I think she has right to do what she wants." Russia added, and of course he was smiling.
"Nobody cares what you think." Alfred retorted, staring at the Russian.
"The last time someone said that to me my people murdered the Czar."
"Brutal." I muttered. "I liked it." After that one I felt the need to walk up to Ivan and give him a high-five, "High- five!"
"Ugh, what are we even supposed to do while you are having your little fashion moment?" France asked, sipping a bit of his coffee in one of the 10 different mugs I have written #1 Dad.
"I don't know, maybe clean up the dishes, jump off the window, use y= mx + b to calculate the slope of how down hill my life is going…" I suggested, as I left everyone while I calmly walked to my bedroom.
And of course I was singing an amazing parody of the song 'A Thousand Miles':
Making my way to the bedroom
Walking past
All this fake hoes
I got to my bedroom and locked the door firmly. I turned on the lights (kinda pointless, cause the window was wide open and the sunrays entered the room, making everything warm and shiny) and glanced around and everything seemed to be in it's rightful place and in order. Even my bed had been made and shit I never make my bed, like, what's the point in organizing stuff when I'll have to mess it up later so I can sleep?
I just leaned against the door for a moment to just process what will happen right now. We'll go to that outlet close by and buy clothes for the nations.
Now that I'm thinking about it, I don't have that much money at my disposal. How am I going to pay for the useless shit we're gonna buy?
Maybe if I force the boys to be my slaves. Like, to work. But not for me. What are they good at?
I must write those ideas down before I forget them.
I quickly grabbed the nearest pen and the nearest piece of paper (which was a maths paper I should be studying for SAT but nah) and started making some bullet points on ideas on how the nations can make me money.
· Take snow off people's porches
· Delivery services
· Language lessons
· Strip
· Selling organs in the deep web
· Assassinations
First of all Rosalina, what the actual fuck.
Second, that list escalated really quickly. I went from 'language lessons' and 'delivery services' to 'strip' and 'selling organs in the deep web'.
Now that I think about it, making them work at a strip club isn't at all a bad idea, I mean, have you, reader, seen Russia's abs? Damn, I can tell you they are strip club material-
Suddenly, my rant was disturbed by a hard know on the door, "Rosalina!? Why are you taking so long?" I heard a pissed off Caitlyn's voice.
"I'm coming, Mom!" I quickly grabbed the closest piece of clothing I found, which was my pair of black baggy sweatpants and a simple pink shirt written 'Awesome' in golden letters across it, the same outfit I wore yesterday.
I changed clothes so quickly that would make Flash jealous, then I unlocked the door and as I was about to go to the living room, I bumped into Ivan in the hallway, "Hmmm, what are you doing?"
"Just making sure you are beings alright!" The Russian smiled sweetly.
Weird, but okay.
After that, both of us got to the living room, where everyone was gathered. Apparently, some God-like entity cleaned all the shit from breakfast. Seriously, who managed to clean that thing up so well?
My guess is Germany.
Alfred, Arthur and Francis were watching TV. For some reason, Flash was on. Weird. Yao was playing Pokémon, Kiku was reading Vogue again, and Ludwig was reading old newspapers, probably to get in touch with all the Greece nonsense.
Once I walked in, nobody stared at me weirdly. What the fuck. Only Ivan stared at me, actually. Maybe they were all absorbed in their activities to notice me.
Dan was showing something or other to Feliciano in her phone, "Look what Sam just sent me,"
The auburn haired Italian scooted closer to the brunette, "Who is-a Sam?"
Samantha Emory, Dan's cousin is like the older version of me. You know, awesome, doesn't give a shit about others, self-centered and all that. Also, she can always get free stuff in stores with male attendants because she has got a pair of huge boobs. Now that I think about, Sam is kinda like our Ukraine, somewhat motherly, gives us stuff and uses her boobs to her benefit.
"My wonderful cousin." Danielle continued, "Anyway, here's what she sent: 'I was born with glass bones and paper skin. Every morning I break my legs, and every afternoon I break my arms. At night I lie awake in agony until my heart attacks put me to sleep'."
"Veee~ That was-a deep."
"I know, right…it reads like some 18th century gothic thing…"
"Guys, this quote is from fucking SpongeBob." I found myself getting the reference. Actually, I'm rather not surprised I recognized that quote from SpongeBob.
Danielle-Senpai finally saw me, she lifted one eyebrow, looked at me from my head to my toes, and then turned to Caitlyn. "Give me back my 20 bucks, Cat."
"Merda [Portuguese- Shit]." The red haired girl took off the shiny 20 dollar bill from her pocket. The exact same one Danielle had given her like 5 minutes earlier.
And that's how quick one gets 20$ poorer.
I sighed, "What did you bet this time?"
"They bet that you would wear the same clothes as yesterday." Alfred replied. Ugh, I hate when he talks, "I kinda wish I had bet too, that way I'd be 20$ richer!"
"Why wouldn't I wear the same clothes?" Cause like, I know water in the planet is running short and shit and the clothes I wore yesterday are completely fine! No ew smell, no bloodstains, no nothing! "I mean, y'all wearing the same outfit! It's not like I saw anyone!"
Danielle stood up from the floor and put her hand in my shoulder, "You saw me. Isn't that good enough for you?"
"Plus that is unhygienic." Arthur added. I'm so gonna kill this British bastard.
"Look who's talking!"
"They haven't got anything else to wear, duh!" For the first time since the nations arrived, Caitlyn could form a sentence without stuttering. That is one hell of an accomplishment, cause like, when we met she took 3 months to stop stuttering while talking to me. So I guess one day for the stutter to disappear was magic.
That's why I won't argue any longer with them.
"That's why we're buying some cool stuff for them." Danielle said, in a motherly tone. Damn I hate when she does that. Like, who does she think she is? Not Daenaerys Targaryen for sure. "But before we go, change your clothes." I hate when she uses that tone, and the weird thing is that I can't deny even the most ridiculous request when she uses it.
Shit I'm quoting too much SpongeBob for a day, geeez.
"Sometimes I wonder if the government is actually watching our very conversation and thinking 'the lack of motivation on this girl is incredible.'" Danielle wondered. "Oops, was that out loud?
"Oh, don't need to worry, the gov. is watching for sure." Alfred stated. Well, he is part of the government, so I guess he knows it better.
"Fine! I'm gonna change!" I stomped my feet angrily. I don't fucking care that it's 9 AM and the neighbors downstairs are sleeping, "Geez, I can't be myself in my house anymore! Or those hoes will fucking annoy me."
Caitlyn turned to me, dead serious, "You're the only hoe here."
"Fuck you." Guess who will have to ¯ \ _ (ツ) _ / ¯ their way through life? Pretty ol' me.
I've bullshitted my way countless time through my life, I guess ¯ \ _ (ツ) _ / ¯-ing my way won't be hard.
I actually don't know why Caitlyn is being so rude right now…maybe she only wants to sound tough so that no one will annoy her? Good thing I don't have feelings so I don't give a shit.
Narrator: But actually, Rosalina did give many shits.
Shut up!
Anyway, I was so immersed in my own thoughts that I didn't even notice Russia following my every move both with his eyes and body.
Double weird.
I calmly walked to my room again cursing everyone's existence in all languages I knew. I got inside, locked the door and proceeded to go to my wardrobe. Fuck I hate this so much that I'm going to choose the first clothing I find and who cares if it will clash.
I opened it and got the first thing I saw I grabbed. Turns out it was a spaghetti sleeve pink with black horizontal stripes dress.
I hate dresses. And I hate pink. Why do I even have those clothes? Oh yeah, it was not me who bought it. If I'm not mistaken, it was actually Sam who bought it for my 17th birthday last September. She thinks I care about fashion as Dan does, thus she gave me this. You can imagine how jealous Danielle was.
Why did I chose it? Ugh, anyway, that'll do because I have no time to lose.
I quickly changed myself and unlocked the door. Once I opened it, I, as expected, encountered Russia waiting in the other side, with his arms crossed and smile eternally placed in his face. "Hmm, you are looking very pretty."
"Thanks, I guess." I shrugged, not giving any shits as I continued to walk to the living room.
Damn Rosalina, why are you such an asshole? He fucking complimented you even though you look like a pink candy cane with this dress. Okay, okay, I promise I'll be nicer next time.
Once I got to the living room, everyone was expecting my triumphal arrival. "Woah dudette, you look stunning!" America observed. Bitch, I always look stunning.
"Indeed, Rosa. You look very nice." England added.
I crossed my arms, "Dudes, I only got a dress so I don't have to match the top with the bottom, okay?" Geez, those people think I actually care about what I'm wearing, but really I couldn't care less.
"Okay, so now Rosa is finally here and we're ready to go." Danielle said. She was at the kitchen, and as everyone turned to her as she spoke, she quickly shoved many little packages inside her purse. Not gonna argue, but that was weird. Why is she stealing my stuff?
"Problem!" Italy exclaimed, waving his arms all around the place.
"Italien [German- Italy] stop." Germany scolded.
"But è vero [Italian-It's true]!" Feliciano continued, not even listening to Ludwig's complains, "You-a see, we were in nine nations plus three ragazzas [Italian- Girls]… How are we-a going to fit inside one car?"
"That is actually a pretty good question." Francis observed. Well, I kinda don't get why they were such in a hurry to go but France was still seating down.
"Yeah, Rosie, how's it gonna be?" Alfred raised his eyebrow in disbelief that I could actually make up a plan.
I laughed heartedly, "You guys know that I don't actually make the good decisions around here, right?" This affirmation might sound false when coming from my mouth, but actually I trust Cat's decisions more than mine's and definitely more than Dan's.
"Who'd know." Britain complained, very annoyed. I'm sure he's pissed because of my delay in going to the mall….Who'd know.
"I know, right! All my decisions are good." I said sarcastically, as I clapped my hands together, "But anyway, where is Caitlyn? Why does she disappear when I most need her?"
Danielle shrugged, "Oh, she's already downstairs with Mattie, Yao and Kiku."
That impatient little leprechaun…. "Come on, y'all! We're grabbing the car!"
Alfred lighted up with my statement, not in the good way, "Finally Captain Lazy decided to do something."
"Shut up, Alfredo." I snapped, as I picked everything we needed in order to have a mildly pleasant trip to the mall. "One of you is going with Kitty-Cat in her motorcycle."
"Phone, check. Car keys, check." I recited, as I collected the things and shoved them inside a little backpack I will be taking to the mall, cause really, I'm not going to use a purse. Ever. "Wallet, money and cards, check." When everything was gathered, I opened the front door, quickly scanned the hallway to be alert to any possible weird thing my neighbor might be doing and shoved everyone out, "Come on, bitches!"
"Congratulations, Rosa. Only one hour late than the time set. You are really something." Britain sighed as he looked at his hand clock.
"Why thank you, Arthur!" I smiled as I locked the door when everyone was already in the corridor, not actually minding the fact that Artie was being sarcastic. After all, I am fluent in three languages: English, shit and sarcasm.
I called the elevator quickly and it didn't take long to arrive, thankfully. I don't fancy Ms. Long to see me here with company.
For some reason I could shove everyone inside the elevator at once. When everyone was inside I pressed the garage button. I have to admit we all had to get a little squeezed inside that thing, and to be honest I am not comfortable by seeing Alfred's and Ivan's faces so close to mine but okay I guess. Who was the prissy bitch who said two bodies can't occupy the same space obviously didn't see the state of this elevator.
"Are you sure this is safe?" Ludwig asked, apparently feeling quite uncomfortable by being squeezed by Danielle and Feliciano, by the time we were at the 4th floor.
"Don't be a killjoy." Danielle scolded the blond German. "It's all part of Lina's plan!"
"But really, the elevator says it supports up to six people and we are in…eight." England commented, trying to shove France away from him.
I shrugged, (but when I did I had to get even closer to Russia, "Don't worry! I always know what I'm doing!" Except when I don't lolz get it.
When we arrived at the garage floor and the elevator doors opened, everyone almost fell to the floor.
But we didn't. Which was good cause I don't look good when I attack the floor backwards.
Also, Yao was at the hallway expecting us. He had his arms crossed and looked rather pissed. "I can't even begin describing how immature you all are being, aru."
I recomposed myself from my previous awkward and squeezed position, "No one asked you, Yaokissoba."
"What did you just call me?"
" 'Best-Asian-country-ever-to-exist' of course." I smiled, "Come on, the quicker we get the better."
"Says the one who's stopped in time." Arthur complained while we walked to my car.
"Foda-se [Portuguese- I don't fucking care]." I retorted.
We arrived to the spot where my car was parked, and to our surprise (not really), Cat was already on top of her purple BMW motorcycle wearing her cool galaxy print helmet, and to my surprise (that was true) Matthew was in the passenger seat of the cycle and was wearing a pink helmet with stars all over it. And that solves our little car problem. The extra nation just drives with the extra person.
Japan however was already inside the car. He lowered the glass of his window and said, "Get in loser, we're going shopping." He then looked at Caitlyn, "Was that good?"
You might be asking (or not) how Kiku managed to get inside my car without me opening it with the key. Simple: I never lock my car lol #thuglife
"Perfect!" Kitty-Cat gave the Japanese boy a thumbs up. "Looks like Regina George herself!"
"OMG Mean Girls that's my favorite movie!" Alfred fangirled on his own.
I turned to the boys behind me and gestured towards the car, "You heard the Honda dudes, hop in!"
"I will be seating with you in the passenger seat, да [Russian-Yes]?" Ivan came up to me and asked, as the others proceeded to enter the minivan. Hell, was that like a demand or something? Cause I'm like, not in the mood for that.
"You can seat with me if you ask for it. Demanding is not cool." I smiled, genuinely. I really want this big guy to lash out all his sweetness and make friends, that's why I'm telling him those friendship rules, it's not like I feel sympathy or whatever. What happened last night stayed last night.
"Хорошо [Russian-okay], I can do that." The big Russian smiled. "Can I seat with you?"
"I don't know, can you?"
"?" Apparently Ivan didn't get the American school system joke.
"Just kidding, big guy." I lightly punched his arm, "You can seat with me." Both of us quickly ran to the car and I shouted, "Hurry up everyone!" The remaining boys squeezed themselves in the other seats as I struggled not to laugh at them. I hope carrying that much people in a car isn't illegal.
Finally when everyone was inside and not complaining about being squeezed by America, Ivan and I took our respective seats and I started the car. "Vrum vrum!"
I quickly made my way out of the garage and into the highway. I always made sure I was actually driving close to Cat's motorcycle in order not to lose her. For some reason, nobody was fighting. Or talking. Maybe they were all just too squeezed to say something.
After some 5 minutes driving, Danielle broke the silence, "Do you guys want to hear my music?"
"Sí [Italian- Yes]" Italy agreed, "What kind of music?"
Danielle giggle lightly, "You'll see!"
As I'm a good driver, I won't be turning around too much to check on the nations. If they for some reason start to kill themselves I'll be like 'boo my bad'.
"If you're playing German Sparkle Party I'm throwing you out." I said.
"Why are you so mean?" Danielle asked, faking a sniff. "Okay, let me synchronize with my phone's Bluetooth…" I turned on the Bluetooth thingy on the radio to help, "And there we go!"
The music started with heavy guitar and heavy drums. What the fuck? Is that actually death metal? I almost had to cover my ears cause it was so loud.
"You listen to death metal?" Germany questioned.
Dan giggled again, "Yeah, why?"
"Nothing."
"That is so weird, dudette!" Alfred observed, "The only one I knew that listened to this things was little Tino!"
Before this discussion could get any weirder, I announced, when we passed through the entrance gate of the mall, "Shut up everyone cause we are here!"
France couldn't actually believe until I managed to park in a spot rather close to the entrance of the mall, which was huge and full of glass windows, "Already?"
"Well of course, because I don't actually respect traffic laws." I turned off the car. That is actually true, since I don't wear seatbelts that often and I almost never respect speed limits #thuglife
Just kidding.
"Lol that explains a lot." Yao giggled, as everyone got out of the car and witnessed Cat's and Mattie's arrival.
Alfred facepalmed, "Are you trying to look less old by using internet slang?"
"I have to try, aru."
"Veeeee~ this place is huge!" Italy observed, as he finally got out of the car (since he and the other Axis were seating at the back back seats they were the last to get out).
"Hai [Japanese- Yes]" Kiku agreed.
"Okay everyone, let's get inside." I said, as I locked the car with the key and later on shoved it inside the little backpack.
As I was able to find a good spot at the parking lot, it didn't took much time for us to arrive at the entrance. Dan started skipping like a little school girl all the way to entrance, and we followed her under the boiling hot sun.
Italy was completely enchanted by the automatic doors, so Dan had to drag him inside. The air conditioner was a health saver, I smiled as I felt the chilly air brush my cheeks.
The mall was huge. It had three floors and it was crowded. We gathered at the entrance hall to discuss what we would do next.
"I know where I'll take you guys first!" Danielle turned around to face us, "Abercrombie & Fitch!"
"Dan, that store was soooo 2011."
"Who cares? I bet everyone will look amazing on those shirts!" She said, rather confident. She proceeded to squeeze Italy's non-existent muscles, "See?"
"I actually refuse to enter that store. Like, one needs a flashlight inside it." I observed. And plus, since nobody buys shit from there anymore, I doubt it will be a nice place to be…except that their prices might be lower, but oh well.
"Where do you suggest, Lina?" Danielle crossed her arms, "Hot Topic?"
I laughed sarcastically, "Ha ha ha do you think I am Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way?"
"Who's that?" Germany asked.
"You definitely don't wanna know." Caitlyn replied for me.
"What if we split up?" America suggested. Hell, that boy can be useful when he wants to hahaha.
"That's actually a really good idea." Kiku agreed with me. Agreed with my mental comment, of course.
Alfred shrugged, and I added, "I'd never see that thing come out of your mouth, Alfredo."
"Who's going with who, then?" Cat asked, "We're in three girls and there are nine nations, so three for each."
At least I wasn't the one who had to do the math. Cause you know, Vikings thought that math was witchcraft, "Also, I personally forbid England and France to stay together." I complemented.
"Why?" Danielle glared at me, like if she was genuinely surprised with that.
"Why? Seriously?" I facepalmed. I'm so sorry that I sometimes mentally say that Danielle is stupid…I don't actually mean it, you know?
"I'll have the Axis!" Thank goodness Dan never takes anything personal, "Kiku, Luddy and Feliiiii~" She squeezed the three of them in her arms. Luddy didn't look really pleased with being hugged by her. Unlike Feli, though.
"Okay, Dan gets the Axis." I made some mental calculations. Well, we have China, England, Russia, Canada, America and France left to be divided.
"I'll be with Matthew, Yao and Arthur." Cat closed her arms, really decided. The three boys quickly gathered beside the ginger haired-girl.
Why do I never end up with the quiet ones… "Okay, Alfredo, Ivan and Francis, you guys are mine." I finally said, as I figured I couldn't think of any plausible reasons how I could get rid of Alfred without him knowing that I kinda hate him.
France took a step closer to me, "I can be forever yours if you wish."
"Shut up Francy-pants! Nobody likes you!" Arthur complained, pushing Francis away from me.
Act like I don't know them. Act like I've never seen those sexually tense people…
"See everyone, that's why France and Britain must not be together." I said, as I brought Francis back to my team.
"We can meet up in the restaurant plaza at 2:00 pm, cool?" Caitlyn suggested, glancing at her watch. "That will give us plenty of time to walk around."
Alfred jumped up, "What about team names?"
"Why would we need team names, you git?" Arthur complained.
I facepalmed, "Arthur you are such a killjoy…"
"It'll make everything more the fun!" Ivan added.
"Alright…pick a name!" Dan turned to her team. Cat turned to her's and I turned to mine but everyone just stared at each other. Ivan looked particularly murderous while glancing at Alfred.
"'Team Pasta'!" I'll give you my soul and my heart if you can guess who said that. Too bad I have neither lolz.
"Wouldn't it be easier just to name your team 'Axis'?" Cat lifted an eyebrow.
"Don't argue." Kiku bluntly said. Well, couldn't have said it better myself.
"Okay, 'Team Pasta'." I said. "How about your team, Cat?"
Cat proudly announced, "We'll be 'Team Rich Nations'."
"I like the way we do the thinking together, aru!" China high-fived the entire team. His attempts on trying to seem less old are actually working pretty well.
"And my team is 'Team Rosalina the Boss.'" Well, I have the right to make one by myself since nobody suggested anything. And what's better than inflating Rosalina's ego?
Alfred frowned, "Who agreed with that?"
"You don't need to agree to anything." I smiled sweetly.
"I say we name it 'Cold War'." Ivan suggested. "Like the good old days, right Amerika?"
"But I wasn't in it." France observed. OMG isn't that super exciting? I'll get to shop with France!1111!1!1!eleven.
"Okay, 'Team Cold War + France'." Whatever dudes, I couldn't care less about this, I grabbed Ivan's and Alfredo's hands and dragged them with me to the left, "Off we go! See everyone else at 2:00!"
And with that, the three teams went on to different directions in search of cheap and fashionable clothes for a bunch of nations.
Authoress: So yeah! I'll be cutting it right here!
Italy: But don't worry! We've got some-a teasers for you!
Authoress: That's right! Some cool little summaries!
-Next up on my stories-
Team Pasta Teaser
Italy gets excited when the group enters an Armani store. Will the group be able to get through the shopping without any security showing up? Stay tuned in How To Live With Hetalia Through Other Eyes to find out!
Team Rich Nations Teaser
Some people weren't born for fashion, and when Cat thinks it'll be a good idea to shop at a cheap place, things might not go as planned. Stay tuned in How To Live With Hetalia Through Other Eyes to find out what will happen next!
Team Cold War + France Teaser
Rosalina has no idea where to start. And she simply doesn't care. She'd rather grab a drink at Starbucks and let the boys be. However, some unexpected casual encounters might change the course of the story. I mean, what are the odds of encountering Hetalia mall cosplayers? Pretty low, right? Right? Stay tuned in How To Live With Hetalia to find out what will happen next!
Rosalina: This story here follows only my timeline, so if you want to read Dan's and Cat's timelines you've got to read 'How To Live With Hetalia Through Other Eyes'.
Caitlyn: But it'll be totally worth it, because you know, we are also pretty awesome!
Danielle: Put awesome in that!
Authoress: So… this is it! If you liked the chapter, why not leave a review? It makes me super happy!
Russia: You will review, дa?
Rosalina: What did I say about demanding, Ivan?
Russia: Sorry… Okay, how about you please review?
Rosalina: That's the Mother Russia I know!
Russia: *blushes*