Author's note: Happy belated Easter day! Have you all found Easter eggs? I just found one the other day with a 'part-time job' inside. Haha kidding aside (yes it was suppose to be a joke), I just found a new part time job so forgive me if I didn't update as I suppose to be. =)

This chapter would be the first one for HBP! Woot! Expect darker scenes and love across the story. I still have many things in store! *winks*

Forgive my grammar errors, thanks! (Sadly, HP will never be mine. Queen Rowling owns it)

Enjoy reading!

The Girl who lived

(Half blood prince)

Chapter forty four: Changes

"NO!"

Renee covered Isabel with her own body, who's frosted on her spot kneeling. She had been trying to hide her true feelings for the entire conversation. But she couldn't just hide it anymore, not that Voldemort about to crusio her mother in front of her…again.

Yes, she was really in front with Lord Voldemort; the most feared evil wizard of all time, her biological father. He wasn't really looked like a human to her (not that she thought that he would like one). But his translucent skin and noseless face scares her to the end. Yet she was good on concealing those, thanks to those lessons she had with the potions master.

It was as if it was a long time ago when only she was asking for the headmaster's permission to join the cause when Isabel barged the door and asking for help (when in fact it was just a couple of hours ago). She was clutching her left arm as if it would cease the pain; and even though Isabel was surprised to see Renee standing in front of the headmaster, she still explained what was happening…or about to happen. The young Gryffindor finally realized, that the dark Lord was summoning Isabel…with her.

And so she found herself defending her kneeling mother on the ground.

"Being soft again Renee?" his cold voice echoed the room.

"Get out of the way Renee" Isabel tried to push her aside, but she ignored the push and stared at the cold blooded wizard in front of them.

"You wish to defy me child?"

"I said get out of the way Renee!"

She continued to stare with him. His bloodshot eyes stared back at her and then after a moment, he smiled…a cruel smile.

"If you wish to save that ungrateful woman…"

"I do not want to be saved, I beg you my Lord…It is I who made the mistake…" she got silenced by the sudden silencing charm Voldemort casted on her.

"I'll do whatever you ask. Just don't hurt her; I'm the one who made the mistake" Renee finally said.

"Very well,"

She watched him called a fellow death eater. A man in his forties entered the room with his head down.

"Bring me the prisoners"

He nodded, "Yes my Lord" and then he left not even glancing back at the two females on the ground.

Renee helped Isabel get on her feet. Her mother locked her eyes with her pleading her to stop the act. She just ignored everything and faced Voldemort with a still expression. He wasn't even blinking too, as if he was trying to crack her mind up. She could clearly feel his mind entering hers; as a matter of fact, she let him peek her mind and let his mind wander on hers. She let him see things, but all of those were unimportant…not at least for her.

His lips curled upwards as he withdraws, making Renee regret of letting him inside her mind.

The same man entered the room again, but this time he wasn't alone. She tried to keep her emotions intact as she saw the other people on hostage. Two boys, one girl same age as her and also an elderly woman was staring back at them. Chill rang to her whole body as she saw them. She might not have been seen them for a while, but she still knew them by heart. Mrs. Choi, their old neighbor gazed at her with surprise; she also recognized the boy beside her; it was Ben, her old schoolmate who bullied her in primary school. In fact all of them get involved with her daily life as muggle, now that she realized it.

They were tied up and very weak looking, making Renee guessed that they were being held hostages for several days now. It was fairly clear that they had also recognized them both, seeing their stares of pleading.

Voldemort walked and whispered to her ear.

She almost stopped breathing as he heard the words.

"You choose" he trailed and then sat at his usual chair with a bored look.

Isabel glanced at Voldemort and then at Renee. She couldn't see her expression, but she could see the faint trembling of her hands as she withdraws her wand and pointed to the muggle in front of her. She couldn't speak because of the silencing charm casted on her, but she keep speaking to the dark Lord, wishing he could understand what she was trying to say.

"Shut up woman" he snapped at her, "Watch my heiress as she began to walk to her right path…as she supposed to be"

She kneeled on the ground with her face touching the floor.

"Be thankful I give you another chance to live Emily. You think I wouldn't know how you tried to kill Rodolphus Lestrange because of your silly reason?" she looked up, "be grateful the child tries to protect you"

Isabel doesn't look grateful even in the slightest. She knew he planned this all along as she watched Renee struggled in front of them along with the muggles.

"We do not have all day, child" Renee gulped at the cold voice.

She finally raised her wand and closed her eyes. She knew there was no turning back now. She knew after this, her life will change…for the worst.

The others struggled on their spot as they stared at Renee. They had been staying there for a few days already that they knew the piece of wood was all about. But they couldn't leave their spot or even moved at all. They saw her mouthed 'please forgive me' and opened her eyes.

Her eyes turned into a cold blooded murderer.

"Aveda Kadabra!"

…..

Renee and Isabel walked in silence. Renee could feel she was dragging herself in walking towards Hogwarts. It was as if she had aged a decade from what just happened the other day. It was a kind of event she would never forget and believed that the event will haunt her dreams for Merlin knows how long. The faces of those people had haunted her dreams last night for the first time, making her fully awake for the whole night.

I should ask some dreamless potion at Madam Poppy later, hope she give me some.

"Renee"

She turned at her mother. Isabel was visibly haggard; with her dark circles on her eyes and a tired face, you could tell she was having the same problem as hers too.

"Mum" she said as Isabel suddenly hugged her tight.

"I'm so sorry you get through this" Renee returned the hug.

"Don't worry about me. I know it will happen sooner or later" she assured her.

"But it shouldn't happened that way"

"It's inevitable"

"But…I—"

"Look Mum" she broke the hug and looked at her in the eye, "Do don't have to blame yourself. I am the one who decided it from the start"

I'm the one who killed them, not you.

Isabel still don't looked convinced, "I was the one who decided to help you. No one forced me or whatsoever" she told her.

"But you're still a c-" Isabel stopped as she saw Renee glaring at her for the word 'child'.

"Just…don't call me…that" that word child will never be applicable to me…ever again.

"Okay, I will not"

They stared on each other and shared a sad knowing smile.

"We'll surpass this, someday." Renee smiled at her as she heard the word 'someday', the same word Sirius used at her.

Someday…I wonder when that will someday come.

"I better go inside, I'll be the one who'll report to Professor Dumbledore" Isabel wanted to protest for Renee's involvement to the Order, but she just nodded and said nothing.

"Oh and Mum," Renee turned at her again, "You and Sirius…you guys are really serious are you?"

Isabel became beet red, "What are you saying…"

"Nothing" she chuckled though the look of her eyes are saying otherwise, "I'll go inside. See you Mum"

She shook her head and started to walk and felt the comfortable feeling Hogwarts was giving to her. It made her spirit lifted up a little, though the sadness was still evident on her eyes. She could see her schoolmates were enjoying Sunday without homework to worry about.

I may be feeling the same way if nothing happened the other night.

Renee knew there was no way her life would be like them, where they have nothing serious to worry about except homework and exams; unlike her who's worrying about her mother's safety and her guilt about killing those innocent people. Not to mention to have Voldemort as a biological father and Harry as a friend…

Ah, I think my mind's going to explode.

"I have to report first to Dumbledore" she muttered as she could feel her fatigue.

Not far from her, she could see Harry. And he wasn't alone; he was with Malfoy, Crabbe and Goyle. It was obvious that they were having an argument; even a fool could see that. You could never place Harry and Malfoy in a same place without one of them picking a fight.

"Three against one…" said Renee slowly as she stared at the blond boy; "Isn't it quite unfair…right Malfoy?"

The three looked at her with fear, something Renee thought she needed to get use to. It was obvious from the look of their eyes that they knew something about her. She stared directly on Malfoy's eyes and speaks to her mind, hoping she could do an accidental legimmen spell.

Say anything and I'll kill you.

She didn't know if it worked or not, but it seems that Malfoy knew her unspoken message. He was the one who broke the stare and gave Harry one last threat before leaving along with his two sidekicks.

Renee watched the three walked away. She knew she needed to get worry how to keep them shut up about her linage, now that she had already met Voldemort.

Ah, so many things to worry about.

"You shouldn't walk alone Harry" Renee reminded the boy. "Where are you going anyway?"

Harry blinked several times before answering her with awkward expression. "Erm…I'm going to Hagrid's. You want to come?"

Renee smiled and nodded. It was also been a while since he saw Hagrid anyway.

It was really quite as they walked. And she was grateful to that. It kept her think that everything was still normal, when she was still worrying about how to fit into Hogwarts and how to get Snape's attention to get his extra lessons.

It made her smile sadly; she knew it will never happen again.

Someday…

"Hey," Harry broke the silence. "Where have you gone to the other day? You didn't came back after you gave those notes to Hermione"

Renee glanced at him, "Oh, just….somewhere, I meet with Mum"

"Is she alright?" he asked her.

She was startled at the question. "What do you mean?" did Dumbledore told…

"I just thought…"Harry gazed at her, "You're acting strange. I just thought something happened to her. She's fine, is she?"

Renee smiled. She always dreamed about having friends getting worried about her. It made her heart swelled on his question. They had been great friends to her even if it is just a short period of time. She wanted to keep the friendship as long as it could get, but she knew it was impossible.

Soon, they will know everything.

"She's fine. Never better" she assured him.

They continue to walk.

"Harry" he glanced back at her. "Yeah?"

"I…I've actually had something to tell you"

They both stopped walking. The student's enjoyment noise kept as a background for them. She closed her eyes and took several deep breaths. She knew Harry doesn't have to be kept in the dark (he had every right to know everything), she wanted to tell everything. But she just couldn't, his image of his killing stare on the crystal ball lingers to her mind.

No.

She finally opened her eyes and stared at Harry's green eyes.

"I—" she trailed, "I asked Dumbledore to let me join in the Order" Harry, I just killed four people and Voldemort told me to join the death eaters on their missions…

He was surprised. She knew from the looks of him that he was.

"And?" she knew he was thinking there was no way Dumbledore let a minor join them. But he didn't know that she has different circumstances. She knew it's a right decision for her to join the Order; now that she had already friends to worry for her, now that her mother has a new determination of their cause, now that she had something to protect too.

There is no way I'm going to let go the people I love without a fight.

"He accepted me," her eyes shone after days without hope, "I'm officially part of the Order now"

…

Renee didn't know how long she had been staring at the ceiling. It was already morning and the sunlight has now trying to get through at her heavy white curtains. It has been weeks since School has ended and temporarily said goodbye to her friends. Harry doesn't look happy on the slightest as he was about to return at his relatives house, though he now understood why he had to come back there.

She covered her face with her arms and sighed. Another dream of that incident had visited her again, and it was already the third time this week. The bottle of dreamless potion was already finished beside her bed and made her thought that she might take some additional dosage later tonight.

But, I might not even able to come home tonight.

The young Gryffindor sat on her bed and looked around. It wasn't the same house she and Isabel staying at for the last decade. Her room was much bigger now than her previous one, yet she still missed her good old bedroom. It was extravagant than she ever imagined; big windows and heavy curtains, a king sized four poster bed with laces and ribbons, and another room for her clothes, and a high shelf with books she still haven't touched.

They never dared to come back again to their muggle home after that incident. It was now dangerous more than ever. So Isabel led her to this mansion, the Briston's mansion…her mother's old home.

"Damn, I forgot to remove this thing" Renee muttered as she raised the black robes she was wearing in disgust. She dumped the black robes with the silver mask lying on the floor and headed at her extravagant bathroom to prep herself.

Her death eater mission started the moment the school ended, making her wear the famous silver mask and black robes that people dreaded to see. From wrecking muggle's structures and forests to torturing muggle; it had been her daily routine instead of having fun and doing homework like every student doing by now. She was quite scared; scared that she might enjoy the bad deeds because of doing it for so long without pause.

Her foot touched the carpeted floor with her fresh sundress and walked barefoot downstairs. No matter how many times she set foot to this house, it never ceased to awe her how big the place was. Of course she thought that it could never compare to Malfoy's mansion house or someone she would know. But living to this kind of house never passed her mind…not at all.

Her continued her way to the kitchen and halted as she heard voices talking.

"It's too bland"

"Is it? Here, let me taste it"

She felt silly eavesdropping, yet she peeked and spied at the adults in the kitchen. Isabel had her usual white apron and a French toast on hand as Sirius took a bite from it to have a taste.

"Maybe if I put a little sugar…"

"For goodness sake, don't try to put some sugar. You never learn the exact meaning of 'measurement' " Isabel glared at him, "Just prepare some honey, It'll be good to go"

Renee leaned on the wall and let them bicker inside the kitchen. They're one of the things that keep her motivated. Sirius was now 'officially' dead to the whole wizarding community, thanks to Isabel's and Dumbledore's way of concealing evidences. And it was only known by selected members of the order and the teens who had been with him at the infirmary.

Sirius stayed with them, even with Harry's dismay. But even though Sirius was not that happy for their arrangement with Harry, he had occupied himself with Isabel without hesitation. She would just laugh whenever she would see them bickering like that in the kitchen. Because she knew behind Isabel's complains against Sirius, Isabel is happy. And she had never seen her that happy, not even before she started to attend at Hogwarts.

"Mistress Isabel, Lady—" Toby stopped as he saw Renee leaning on the wall and trying to hush him up.

She came out from her hiding spot and motioned the house elf to continue his way in the kitchen. "Morning" she greeted the two adults.

Isabel pushed Sirius away with the bread on hand, "Ah morning dear, breakfast?" Renee nodded as she tried to ignore her mother's reaction like she had been caught red handed.

She sat on the chair and watched Sirius pour some coffee on her cup.

"Thanks" she smiled and then glanced at the nearest reading material on the table.

Sirius watched the young witch read the newspaper. As much as he didn't want to admit, he did pity Renee for what was happening to her life now. He was one of people who didn't want to accept Renee as a new member of the Order, but his fake death made his opinion not heard by the others. Looking at her shallow and tired eyes and not to mention getting thinner as days passed, it was obvious they had robbed her innocence and for her to experience a normal teenage life. She had been getting home in wee hours and as the young Gryffindor sleeps, they could hear her shouting because of her nightmares.

It was unbearable to watch without doing anything.

He already talked to Isabel about it. And as much as Isabel didn't like what was happening to her daughter, she couldn't do anything about it. As letting Renee off the Death eaters would mean death for her and destroying all of their plans. They argued about it for weeks, but in the end it didn't solved anything.

On the other hand, Isabel tried to be normal as possibly as she could. She knew Renee was experiencing the worst days of her life she could ever had, and adding to her problems would be a disaster for her daughter. She had once gone to a death eater mission with Renee on her side; and as much as she didn't admit, Renee was doing a good job in doing her role.

And it was one that scares her.

She couldn't deny Voldemort's blood running to her veins as Renee joined the other side. What she had imagined long ago was far off from what was happening now. If she wasn't a good occlumens, everyone would see how she feared her own daughter when Renee would step into the dark side. The cruelness of her eyes was something every death eaters feared of even if she was just watching from the sidelines or occasionally shooting curses on their targets.

It was as if it wasn't the Renee she raised up.

And so she was most relived when she could see Renee in her usual state; where the girl was nothing worrying anything other than her coffee cravings and morning newspaper. Isabel knew she cannot do anything about the girl's involvement to her dangerous life; it was like Renee said the day after her initiation, it was inevitable…sooner or later Renee would be a part of the upcoming war, whether they liked it or not.

…..

Renee watched the other masked men behind her own silver mask. Tonight they'll be destroying some properties and homes like Voldemort wanted to. The dark Lord wanted a dramatic effect for everyone to know he was alive and ready to terrorize the whole community. She really wanted to snort at that, though the only expression she gave to the Dark Lord was affirmation. Renee didn't know Voldemort could be such a show-off, not until they had started their nightly mission.

She started joining into mission as watching in the sideline and then occasionally throwing spells or such, while the others were having their day of their lives in destroying and torturing muggles many as they could. She might be always informing the headmaster what their future plans be and making preventive measures and all that, but they couldn't help but a muggle or two slip out. And seeing them getting tortured always makes her stomach curl. Those scenes added to her long nightmare's list and made her dreamless potion useless.

And tonight would be just like any nights of her death eater experience, as she humored herself as she called herself 'on-the-job' trainee. They were in a dark and muddy forest, when all she wanted was to curled up on her bed and read a book. It was a good thing they were wearing mask or they'll be seeing how irritated she was now. In fact, she was far irritated than her previous missions.

Renee glanced on her sides as ear deafening footsteps were nearing her. As much as she liked Hagrid and Gwampy, she doesn't like the idea of using giants to terrorize muggles. Fifty feet tall creatures' sure means great disaster and she doesn't know if the Order were ready for it. Giants were uncalled for and no one informed her about their involvement at their 'little' mission.

She was far pissed today.

Amycus was the one who's leading the mission and of course with Alecto on his side. Even covered with black robes and silver mask, she could easily point who's leading the mission. With the siblings were famous for their being squat and lumpy, with a lopsided leer and a wheezy giggle; it was a piece of cake to recognize them. She let them lead the way, making herself as invisible as possible. Renee might be Voldemort's daughter, but she was still a novice and Voldemort had emphasized it to her as he made her kill those muggles.

And so she watched the lumpy Amycus to cast a spell and got copied by the other death eaters, like their having a time of their lives. Strong winds started to form until it became a tornado, not far from their spot; and just like Amycus signal, it went straight at the houses below them, making a disastrous scene. The giants also started their job; they pulled trees to their roots and throw it anywhere they wanted.

It was a disastrous scene indeed.

I really hoped they got the people evacuated.

She followed them while one of her fears came true; they're going down to the nearest town to terrorize muggles. Renee was on the inch in hexing everyone or anything just to make them stop from their plans. Going down the town wasn't the Dark Lord instructed though the idea had never left her mind from last night (which also of course brings me again for another set of nightmares).

Someone among the team walked besides her, making Renee glared at the man. She always hated whenever a death eater tried to walk beside her. Most of them were trying to be extra nice to her, since she was Voldemort's daughter. And the last one who tried to serve her while they're in a mission like this experience a stunning spell from her.

They never learn, do they?

She was about to spat an insult when she realized the person walking with him. It might be dark but she could still see his pitch black eyes and familiar body built.

"Prof…I mean Severus" she corrected herself and felt how his name sound so foreign into her lips, "I didn't recollect that you're also joining us here"

"The Dark Lord sends me here my Lady" she was sure she was blushing behind her mask and for the second time she was glad she was wearing the hideous mask.

"I do not need any protection" Renee insisted as she could see peripherally some death eaters glancing their way.

"Of course, my lady" he bowed, though only she could hear his voice getting sarcastic. "It was rude for me to think of that, please forgive me"

She had been trying to get use of the professor's polite voice at her since summer. But she just couldn't sink it all. He gazed at her green eyes and for a moment she knew he was trying to communicate to her, so she lower her occlumens shield for a moment.

Did they succeed in evacuating the people?

They're working on it, they're waiting for us down and fight with them.

I'll try to distract the Amycus in torturing many muggles he could find, dang this mission. They got to evacuate those muggles before I could strangle Amycus to death.

Renee placed back her shield in place and looked forward with guarded face.

Another thing to worry about, just great.

They reached the town. It was quite but besides Renee and Snape, no one noticed it. And like maniacs, the death eaters started their work. They started to get havoc; wrecking houses by fire and destructive spells. She remained to be still with her wand on her hand and stood there watching the disaster they're doing for hours. A smile graced her lips while watching the place getting destroyed without her getting noticed at all.

What the?

She wiped the smile on her face and looked around. Surely, no one had seen her smiling because of her mask but she felt so guilty. She needed to clear her head.

"Just great" she muttered as she realized that she could hear voices screaming. Renee wanted to pull all of her hair in frustration.

They didn't get all muggles out of the village!

Renee removed herself from leaning on the tree and started to roam around. The village was obviously in wrecking state. She fastens her pace to look for any muggle she could save secretly. It was then she heard a faint voice of a woman from one of the houses, making her walked to that path and burst the door open.

A woman in her twenties gazed at her with frightened eyes. But the man on top of her didn't even glance at her. He doesn't even wear their silver mask; nevertheless Renee instantly recognized the man.

"Greyback, we didn't come here to eat" she idly said, though she was panicking at the back of her mind. Fenrir Greyback is a werewolf associated with the dark side; though his position isn't even higher enough to give him a privilege to wear the said mask.

But it doesn't mean he wasn't dangerous at all.

In fact, he was the one of the persons she didn't want to collide.

He just grunted, but continued to ravish the woman in front of her. The woman shouted and directly plead at the weird clothed woman, "Please stop him! I beg of you!"

Renee stared at the woman. From the looks of the woman, she must have been not much older than her. Her dark brown eyes stared directly on her green ones, making her startled.

"Stop playing around Greyback" she told him.

"I'll come by in a minute"

She could feel her vein popping out of her forehead. Renee casted a spell and slammed the man on the nearest wall.

"I. Said. Stop. Playing. Around" she launched at him and pointed her wand at him with full of hatred.

"Jealous my lady?" he laughed maniacally and brushed his hand on her shoulders. "I could play with you if you want"

The woman scrambled to crawl out of her spot and run towards the door. Renee idly casted a Locomotor Mortis spell on the woman as running on the streets will just make her killed on the spot.

"Do not mess with me" she snarled back at the pinned man.

"You think you're that great because you're the Dark lord's daughter?" he laughed again, though he was carefully eyeing her wand on his neck.

Of course, he wouldn't trust me.

She wasn't really surprised at that. It was quite roaming around the circle how Isabel almost killed Rodolphus Lestrange for removing Sirius' curse. If it wasn't for Voldemort's one last chance he gave, Isabel might have dead by now. But it doesn't mean they were trusted by the other members of the dark circle instantly. Not even for a girl who Voldemort claimed to be his rightful heiress.

So to make the story short, not everyone believes her and Isabel but just couldn't voice it out because of the Dark Lord.

Renee glared at him with loathing. She might not like her new title as Voldemort's daughter, but underestimating her makes her blood boil.

Before she could react, Greyback had gained control and pushed her so hard that she slammed on the wall across them. Renee yelp in pain as his hand gripped her arm so hard that she thought he crushed her bones. Greyback removed her mask and smiled in triumph as he saw her pain.

"I'll kill you" she cursed him.

"Such heavy feelings, I'm flattered" he dropped the silver mask, whispered into her ear and licked it, "I really preferred younger girls than the mudblood anyway"

Renee shivered and struggled by his grip, but the werewolf was much stronger than her. His lips travelled to her neck, to her very much disgust.

"Feel like asking for help my Lady?" he teased her as his breath was tickling her neck, "No one will save you, I ass—"

Greyback flew across the wall, destroying the furniture that comes his way. Renee fearfully glanced at the source of the spell. A man with silver mask was pointing his wand at the werewolf and spoke.

"What do you think you're doing Greyback?" his velvet voice made Renee instantly relieved that it was Snape who found them.

"We were just having a little—" Snape darted to his way so fast while pointing his wand at him.

"A little comfortable chat in your expense" he continued his phrase, "I'll make sure the Dark Lord will hear this"

Greyback's face darkened at that.

"I'm just fooling around with her"

"The Dark Lord will surely not be happy if he learns that you're having such intimate talk with our Lady, Leave and return to your job" he heard nothing and pointed the door before he could do something at the fellow acquaintance. Greyback glanced at him and Renee before dashing out of the house.

Renee, who's leaning on the wall for the entire time slid on the floor until she was sat on the floor. She might be strong in front at all times, but it really shook her terribly. Snape glanced at the rooted girl on the floor and helped her to stand up.

"Did he bite you?" it was the first thing he asked. Renee shook her head.

"No, he did not dare" she whispered but then whimpered as Snape's hands were on the same spot where Greyback gripped her. Snape noticed this and pulled her black robes and saw the purple bruises on her both arms.

"Don't worry about me, what happened at the—"

"They retreat as soon as the Order came to the rescue" Snape explained as he help her, "Only you and Greyback didn't came back in time"

"Stupid werewolf, I'll kill him" she muttered. Renee and Snape finally realized the woman frosted on her spot.

Renee gave Snape a knowing look and gave him the floor. The woman watched Snape kneeled on the floor and pointed the wooden stick on her temple.

"Obviliate" and then she passed out.

Snape stood up and glanced at Renee. Her eyes were closed as she didn't watched him erased her memories. He never dreamed of seeing Renee wearing the same black robes as him; granted, he was first on the list who oppose in letting Renee joining the dangerous mission. But he couldn't undo Dumbledore's decision…or Renee's. Not especially when he learned that Voldemort had already met Renee.

Renee opened her eyes and caught Snape looking at her. She tried to smile, but it just turned into a grimace.

"Let's get out of this place"

A/N: Poor Renee..ugh. =/ curse noseless Voldy. Team Sirius and Isabel for the win! Lol (you can never make me unship this )

Make my day brighter? Send me a review! *winks*

Renesnee