Miaka and Taka lay next to each other, Hikari sleeping on Taka's chest. The evening sun poured in from the French window. Taka was unwilling to leave his daughter's side.
"I've been thinking." Miaka said, her voice dry. "I've never been outside Japan."
Taka looked at Miaka, confused.
"How would I meet you if Suzaku didn't tweak your reincarnation?" Miaka continued. "It was because of Suzaku that you were born in Japan. What if you were reincarnated in Spain? How would I've met you then?"
"I would have found my way to you." Taka said, his voice hollow. "No matter the odds, I would have found you Miaka."
"How would you know to look for me?" Miaka asked. "If I hadn't met you when you were Tamahome... if we didn't fall in love when you were Tamahome..."
Taka turned to face his wife who was looking at the ceiling. He raised his right hand, the ruby from their engagement ring twinkling in the evening sun.
Taka smiled a little. Hikari clutched his shirt.
"I can't believe I have to say this to you all over again." Taka said, cupping Miaka's face in his hand, slowly turning her to face him. "Now things are like this. But I believe in you. Someday I will see you again. No, I will find you. It's a promise. Even if I look different, even if it takes a thousand or ten thousand years, no matter what world it is, I'll come for you. I'll conquer any hurdle. And then I'll say it to you again."
Taka wiped the tears from Miaka's cheek.
"Wo Ai Ni." Taka muttered, as he kissed Miaka's forehead.
From in between them, Hikari faded away.
"No." Miaka muttered, panicking. "No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no."
Taka pulled her closer, close to succumbing to tears himself.
"Miaka!" Yui called out, knocking on the door. "Can I come in?"
Miaka didn't respond.
"Yeah." Taka responded, a while later, gently letting go of Miaka, sitting up on the bed.
Yui stood at the door, her face worried, forgetting why she came.
Not Hiki. Yui thought, controlling the urge to scream.
"Hikari..." Miaka cried in pain.
"We still remember." Yui said, trying to sound optimistic. "History isn't rewritten. There still is a chance."
But in that house, Yui was the only one clinging to that hope.
-X-X-
Sleep evaded Zakuro again. She blankly stared at the open text book, the words hazy.
She looked at her phone for messages. She dawdled for a while, playing a game on her phone.
She then shook her head and took a deep breath. She looked at the watch on the table. It was almost 1 in the morning.
She slapped her cheeks and stared at the book, willing her brain to study. She tied up her hair and ran her fingers at the length.
"That's right!" Zakuro exclaimed.
Sorry to text you so late! But can we go to a salon after school tomorrow? Zakuro texted Yuna.
Her phone buzzed a while later with Yuna's reply.
Sure. Why are you up so late? Get some sleep, NERD! :) XOXO Yuna replied.
Zakuro smiled at the text. She switched off her table light and crawled into bed. She stared at the ceiling.
I don't have to feel so guilty. Zakuro thought. If they knew, they would have kicked me back here anyway.
She turned to her side, her palm facing the ceiling. She thought of her time in the book world. She thought of all the pain and sadness she left behind.
"It's only natural." Zakuro murmured to herself.
It was around then she felt a slight pressure on her hand. A pressure from a memory. She returned the pressure unconsciously, still remembering the warmth.
A hazy memory of Suzahara holding her hand in the room of the inn at Kai Lo surfaced. Zakuro couldn't help but smile.
She closed her eyes trying to get the memory in focus. She could almost feel his hand.
"Suzahara..." She murmured.
"I will never forget you." Zakuro heard the distant echo of a memory.
She remembered the soft sensation on her cheeks. For the first time since she got back, she felt at ease. Her eyes drooped.
"Suzahara..." Zakuro repeated.
She felt happy just saying his name...
And almost immediately, Zakuro's eyes snapped open and she sat up, throwing the covers off her.
"What the hell?!" She exclaimed. "Why am I thinking about him?"
She felt her heart pounding. She finally understood the pit in her stomach.
"No way." Zakuro muttered, blushing. "No way, no way, no way!"
She shook her head rapidly and then hugged her knees.
"It's not possible." She muttered.
But the more she denied it, the more she thought of him. She remembered his stupid grin. She remembered the look of worry on his face when they were in Ju En. She remembered him getting angry when she was injured. She remembered him taking bites of her food.
"No way." Zakuro said, one final time, the feeling of embarrassment quickly replaced by stomach churning sadness.
Dawn arrived treacherously early. Zakuro popped in an aspirin and rubbed her temples having spent another sleepless night.
She had spent the night, trying not to think about Suzahara.
But the more she tried, the more she thought about him. The more she thought, the longer she couldn't sleep.
She took a couple of pills and put them in her pockets.
She combed her hair, smoothing out the disarray. She sighed looking at her pale, sickly face.
She went to the kitchen and waited at the door, trying to listen in on the familiar humming before being badgered for not taking her vitamins. But the humming was completely out of tune.
"Dad?" Zakuro said, confused, as she entered the kitchen.
"Good morning, sweetheart!" Zakuro's Dad said, brightly.
"Where's Mom?" Zakuro asked, taking her seat at the table.
"Sick." Zakuro's Dad said, putting some pancakes on Zakuro's plate. "She's been up all night. She may have the stomach flu. I will be taking her to the doctor later."
Zakuro and her father looked at each other for a minute. They then burst out into laughter.
"I'm serious." Zakuro's Dad said, wiping a tear from his eye. "She really does need to go to the doctor."
"I would love to see you try." Zakuro said, grinning. "She can't even stand the sight of a hospital building, let alone go inside."
Zakuro's Dad ran his fingers through his hair.
"It's gonna be tough." Zakuro's Dad said. "But I'm the man. And it's gonna come down to me to take charge."
Zakuro's Mom entered the kitchen, still in her night clothes, her hair clumped in every direction. She frowned at the unhealthy breakfast and sat at the table.
"Really?" Zakuro said, addressing her Dad, a glint of mischief in her eyes. "I read this article that they're now giving fifteen shots to every patient who comes to a hospital. Just as a precaution."
Zakuro's Mom shivered next to her. Zakuro's Dad gaped at Zakuro. Zakuro slid off her chair towards her Mom, grinning at her Dad. She swiftly kissed her Mom on the cheek.
"Want me to take the day off?" Zakuro offered.
Zakuro's Mom shook her head.
"You look pale." Zakuro's Mom said, her voice weak. "Honey, she looks pale. Can you check her temperature?"
Zakuro rolled her eyes.
"I'm fine, Mom." Zakuro said, before going to the door. "Itekimasu!"
Zakuro looked down from the second floor, as she waited for Toya. The wind blew gently, the trees swaying.
"Suzahara..." Zakuro mumbled, holding on to the memory of his voice.
"Let's go." Toya said, tonelessly, from behind Zakuro.
Zakuro yelped in surprise and turned around, her stance defensive. Toya looked at her with his eyebrows raised. He then burst into laughter. Zakuro blushed.
"Shut up." Zakuro grumbled and started walking.
Toya jogged upto her.
"Were you gonna punch me?" Toya said, still sniggering.
Zakuro maintained a dignified silence.
"I hope Sukunami-sensei comes in today." Toya said, patting his bag.
Zakuro glanced sideways. She was sure Toya had the book in his bag.
-X-X-
Chichiri and Tamahome walked out of the Royal Courtroom, having just discussed contingency plans for their impending slip to oblivion .
"Genbu and Byakko are old Gods." Chichiri said, frowning. "If we are able to get a message across somehow..."
Tamahome shook his head.
"We cannot rebel against Equilibrium." Tamahome said, taking a turn towards the throne room. "Only Master would have the juice for that."
"Master is back to moping in his room." Nuriko said, as Chichiri and Tamahome passed by.
Tamahome sighed.
"He cannot go through stages of grief all over again." Chichiri said, indignant. "This is too important."
"If we're to ensure Ojou-chan's safety, this has to be fool proof." Tamahome said, running his hand through his hair. "Genbu and Byakko will have to find a way to hold the fabric of reality together. Obviously, we cannot depend on Seiryuu."
Nuriko giggled. Chichiri and Tamahome looked at her scandalized. Nuriko cleared her throat before talking.
"It's odd." Nuriko said, her expression calm. "Kotou and Konan have always fought. But their protector deities are the best of friends. So much so that even Equilibrium lumps them together."
Chichiri and Tamahome quietly waited for Nuriko to get to the point.
"Frankly..." Nuriko continued. "I'm not sure if what we're doing is right. As Gods, we do not have the privilege to be selfish. But if it is for her... If this is for Zakuro... Then I'm OK with it. I'm OK with the old Gods scrambling to find a way to close the gates of hell. I'm OK with Unme hating humans. I'm OK to have lived my life in my father's shadow, never knowing the courage that Zakuro showed me. What I mean to say is..."
Nuriko looked at Chichiri and Tamahome, her voice calm.
"We cannot fight the will of Equilibrium. And Equilibrium seems to want Zakuro to live, almost as much as we do." Nuriko said resolutely.
-X-X-
Yui studied her blue studs in the mirror.
"Yui?" Tetsuya said, as he entered the room.
He embraced Yui from behind and rested his chin on her shoulders. Yui clutched his arm.
"Hikari..." Yui said, unable to speak.
Tetsuya knew how attached Yui was to her God-daughter.
"I know." Tetsuya said, kissing her neck. "Are you worried about Nakago?"
Though Tetsuya didn't understand it, he never objected to Yui holding onto the symbol of a man who caused her so much pain. Yui insisted that the Seiryuu Seven, especially Nakago, had cruel lives. Tetsuya knew this was a part of Yui he would never be able to understand.
"They look paler." Yui said. "I have looked at them every day for the last 8 years and suddenly they look paler."
Tetsuya frowned.
"Why?" Tetsuya said. "You're of Seiryuu."
Yui looked down, her long golden hair covering her face. Tetsuya embraced her tighter.
"It's going to be alright." Tetsuya murmured into Yui's ears.
Yui stubbornly nodded.
"Yui..." Yui heard the defeated voice of her best friend calling her.
Miaka stood at the door of the guest bedroom, her once twinkling golden brown eyes, sunken and lost. Tetsuya left the room, pausing to clutch Miaka's shoulder.
"Yui..." Miaka called out again.
Yui quickly crossed the room and went to her best friend.
"What do I do?" Miaka said, looking Yui dead in the eyes. "Everything is falling apart. Everything that we built... My life... When I summoned Suzaku...When I thought that Tamahome and I were going to be separated, I knew I would be OK somehow...Just with the memories... Someway I knew I would be able to live, the way Suzano-san did. But if I forget everything... If nothing ever happened..."
Miaka looked too desperate to cry.
"What do I do, Yui?" Miaka asked, trying to clutch for straws.
"Don't lose hope, Miaka." Yui said, gently. "We still remember."
Miaka stared blankly at Yui, the words washing off her. Yui stroked Miaka's head.
"It means that history isn't rewritten yet." Yui continued. "It means that we're in the in-between. There is still a chance for us to go back to the way things were. Zakuro is a good person. If she knows that the Gates of Hell are opening, she will want to go back to help the friends she made there. I'm sure of it."
Yui said the last sentence for herself more than for Miaka. Tears silently flowed down Miaka's cheeks.
"Isn't it a horrible thing to want?" Miaka said, her voice twisted in guilt. "Isn't it terrible to want to push an innocent child into certain death just so that we could be happy? If everything resets, how will I ever be happy with this knowledge?"
Yui pursed her lips. Her silence wasn't the answer Miaka was looking for.
-X-X-
Yuna, Satsuki, Rin and Zakuro were on the train, on their way to an upscale salon in the heart of Tokyo.
"I don't even know why you cut your hair!" Satsuki lamented. "It was so old school! Isn't that what's in right now?"
Satsuki leaned back a little. But Zakuro was lost to the world. She clutched her knees, her mind stuck on Suzahara. What was she supposed to do?
"When the aliens invaded, they didn't start at the Statue of Liberty." Yuna said. "Don't you think that's weird, Zakuro?"
"Yeah." Zakuro murmured. "Weird."
Rin and Satsuki grinned at each other.
"Big Bird was arrested yesterday evening." Satsuki said, leaning closer to Zakuro. "He lied about the letter of the day because he was high. Unreal, right Zakuro?"
"Yeah." Zakuro mumbled. "Unreal."
"Zakuro!" Rin said, leaning over Satsuki and shaking Zakuro's shoulders.
"Yes!" Zakuro said, standing up in attention.
The other girls erupted into giggles. Zakuro frowned at the lot and sat down.
"Bullying is against the law." Zakuro grumbled.
Yuna nudged Zakuro with her shoulder.
"What's on your mind?" She said, grinning. "You've been spacing out all day."
"Nothing." Zakuro said, all too quickly.
"Nothing?" Satsuki said, joining in. "Should I get the toads ready?"
The other girls were quiet for a moment.
"What?" Yuna asked confused.
"You know." Satsuki said, flushing. "From my joke yesterday. Toads in locker. Remember?"
Rin coughed. Zakuro and Yuna looked at Satsuki straight faced. Satsuki blushed in embarrassment.
"A-a-a-anyway..." Satsuki started. "Is this about Kagakuni-kun?"
Zakuro frowned and shook her head. She had to get it out. She had to talk about it.
"I don't know how to put this..." Zakuro started, trying to think of ways to say everything without seeming crazy.
Yuna, Satsuki and Rin waited patiently, suddenly aware of the seriousness in Zakuro's tone.
"I have this friend..." Zakuro started, cringing at the cliché.
"She has a major crush on this guy." Zakuro said, making up as she spoke. "When I say major, I mean MAJOR. The type that doesn't let you sleep or think straight... And the guy is really nice to her. A complete sweetheart. But he doesn't know that... he is dying. Being with her can potentially kill him."
Zakuro tweaked the truth.
"She does." Zakuro continued. "But he doesn't know. It's all very secretive. But the thing is..."
Zakuro clutched her knees.
"She..." Zakuro continued. "My friend... Wants to be with him. Even if it's for a little while. But wouldn't it be too painful after he is gone? Wouldn't it be too selfish if to be with him knowing they're going to be separated? Wouldn't it be more prudent to just move on?"
Her friends were quiet for a while. Zakuro watched the telephone towers whizz by the window.
"Kill him?" Yuna said, in a small voice. "Zakuro, do you like somebody connected to the yakuza?"
"What?!" Zakuro exclaimed. "I'm asking for a friend."
"It's not funny anymore, Zakuro." Rin said, her voice serious. "You CANNOT get involved with the yakuza. It's too dangerous."
Zakuro decided to go with the flow, instead of contradicting them.
"My friend can't help it." Zakuro said, stubbornly. "She cannot choose who she falls for. And the guy really is sweet."
Yuna rubbed her temples.
"Don't be silly, Zakuro!" Yuna said, pensively. "You can get guys who're much better. It's not like you're in love with him! You'll move on!"
"Love?" Zakuro said, caught unaware.
"I don't know why you guys are discouraging her." Satsuki said, finally speaking up. "Isn't it all very romantic?"
Rin glared at her.
"Don't encourage her!" Rin chided.
"I'm not telling her what to do." Satsuki replied, not breaking eye contact with Zakuro. "Do I wish the guy was not from the yakuza? Yes, I very much do. But if Zakuro likes him, I say you go for it. Everybody has a finite time in this world anyway. If you feel strongly for this guy, I support you 100%"
"Satsuki..." Zakuro mumbled, gratefully.
I will get over him. Zakuro thought to herself. This is just a crush.
Yuna caught Satsuki's cheeks and pulled them.
"That was way too deep for you." Yuna said, frowning.
"Ow!" Satsuki groaned.
Zakuro laughed. Rin frowned at the lot.
"We wanna meet him though." Satsuki added, pushing Yuna away. "Give our blessings before you start dating."
"D-d-date?" Zakuro stuttered. "Me? This is for a friend!"
Yuna rolled her eyes.
"Do you have a photo?" Yuna said, taking Zakuro's phone from her hand.
Zakuro shook her head.
"We need pictures." Satsuki chimed in. "And contact details. Which school does he go to?"
Rin continued frowning at the lot, opening her mouth in intervals as though trying to say something. Before Zakuro could come up with anything, Yuna's phone rang.
"Akane-senpai!" Yuna said, picking up the call. "Zakuro? Yeah, she is here... She didn't... Of course she is... Yup. See ya!"
Yuna disconnected the call.
"That was Akane-senpai." Yuna filled the others in. "She didn't know if Zakuro was coming tomorrow. I confirmed for her."
"Huh?" Zakuro asked confused.
"Didn't you get the text?" Satsuki asked, pulling out her phone and pushing it towards Zakuro.
Dear Kohai-tachi. Please join us for a day of fun at the Kagerou Karaoke Club on Saturday. Hope you can make it! Lots of love, all your Senpai :)
Zakuro looked at the time stamp on the message. It was sent when Zakuro was in the book world. Zakuro scrolled through her phone again and found the message.
"We've to be there by 10." Yuna said, smiling.
"Sounds fun." Zakuro said, putting her phone in her pocket.
This is the right choice. Zakuro thought. It's just a crush. I will get over it. Just like I got over Toya. This is where I belong.
AN:
I have been playing the ending song of FY (Tokimeki no Doukasen; Fuse of excitement) on repeat for the past couple of days. Man! I love that song. It's been ages since that song came out and the lyrics are actually really weird... But I always picture Miaka and Tamahome when I listen to that song. The song still gives me goose bumps which really is an ode to this amazing series.
Hope you guys enjoyed this chapter.
Please do leave a review!
As always, keep reading!